HTML: Hate This Meaningless Life
CSS: Can't Style Shit
JS: Just Shit
Java: Just another vicious asshole
PHP: PHP Hates People
Go: (the "fuck yourself" is silent)
.NET: Now Everybody Thinks (they can code)

I really should find a more productive thing to do on my breaks.

FUCK YOU SHITTY FUCKING DICK HEAD!!!.. I'M FUCKING TIRED OF YOUR FUCKING BULLSHIT ABOUT "YOU'RE A PROGRAMMER... YOU MUST KNOW HOW TO USE PHOTOSHOP!"... OR "SUCH A SHITTY PROGRAMMER YOU ARE... DON'T YOU KNOW HOW TO FIX MY COMPUTER"... OR "CAN YOU MAKE ME AN APP?... IT'S LIKE OTHER APP BUT BETTER, I CAN'T GIVE YOU MORE DETAILS BECAUSE IT'S CONFIDENCIAL, SO YOU GOT TO DO IT WHIT OUT KNOWING WHAT THE FUCK YOU HAVE TO DO"... GO TO FUCK YOURSELF WITH A TRUCK FULL OF DONKEYS FUCKING IDIOT!!!... STOP TALKING BULLSHIT AND GET AND FUCKING LIFE YOU ASSHOLE!!!... sorry about my english for those who read

I FUCKING HATE WAITING FOR PEOPLE.

It feels like a full quarter of my life is wasted just goddamn WAITING.

Fuck off.

From now on I'm just leaving whomever behind.

I googled "fuck apple" and ended up here... so yeah fuck this piece of shit company with shitty overpriced cancer inducing products. Xcode is the worse garbage I've ever seen in my life. For a company that masturbates to their superior design well they can eat a fat dick cause its horrible. Everything this fucking company does makes me waste my time. Add a fucking notch to their displays, retarded app store process, makes you workaround to install latest OS on older machines, hide options in convoluted interface, everything, make you feel like your 12 again and living with your parents. fuck them. fuck apple fan boys. fuck tim cook. fuck kids that jack off to iphones fuck you if you own a macbook and drink at starbucks . this is the last fucking ios app I ever make. bye

So my friend started a YouTube channel, being the motivational man I am I encouraged him and made him a logo for his channel.

It started here, he called me a bazillion times every single day asking me to make stuff like Channel banners, intros.

He even went so far to call my design bad and that I could do better.

I'm definitely losing my hold on my generosity, it's like this with every single fucktard I help. It's like programmers don't get to have a life, people pitch me stupid ideas at every party.. Having a casual conversation a guy starts talking about an idea.

Oooh... And the worst part they say you can have 60% and just give them 40% 'MINORITY' share for coming up with an idea I could pull up from my arse instantaneously

Next time he asks me something I'm gonna fuck him up or just charge him a bazillion dollars... FUCK FUCK FUCK... REALLY GOT TO BUY THAT STUPID STRESS CUBE

When your school project team fails to deliver 3 times in a row because of their incompetency and they're the sole reason for your failing grades

I am a hobby programmer. I just got rejected by the biggest crush of my life. I guess I'm stuck with my stupid wothless fucking life writing code. How fucking exciting....

Well what the fuck. Life just won't stop with the dick punches this year.

To recap: My wife had me arrested on bs charges. While i was in jail, she packed her shit and left. She filed a restraining order, which i fought in court amd won. I have visitation with my daughter every other saturday and every Monday. I lost my apartment because she left, so I'm homeless. Living in my car.

Today, I was fired from my job of 6 years. Fuck me.

1hr before going to prod, after working for 16 straight hours, fuck my life

!Rant

Doctors called me back, I’ve got brain decompression surgery in a month... fuck my life. If it’s not one fucking thing it’s another.

Dad: What are you doing with your life?

Me: Enjoying it. Can you say the same?

My dad degrades me for my programming because he's from 'that generation.' Fuck him, Imma do what I enjoy, cause I'm damn well sure I don't want to end up like him.

Whoever thinks that coding is easy.

Fuck you motherfucker stupid chicken head nugget sized brain faggots. You think all we do is smash keyboards in front of our screen and it poops code and creates beautiful applications? Fuck you in particular.

One of my friend says sitting on computer for whole day is the easiest thing. What the fuck motherfucker.
One fucking string can fuck your life forever. Innumerable hours will be wasted behind one simple fucked up logic. And u shithead say its easy.
Get into my shoes and let me bang your head on the keyboard and we will see how beautifully it poops code.

Stupid people.

So my ethernet randomly stopped working on Arch.

At first I thought it had to do with a conflict between it and my tethered phone, so I tried removing all my connections. Still wasn't working.

Next I tried to test the driver itself and make sure it loaded on boot. It loaded, but was disconnected.

Next I decided "fuck it, I know I was just using the internet on Windows, but I'll check the ethernet cable is still plugged in anyway". It was, and it was returning the right MAC address, but still no connection.

So I try debugging the driver further. Everything seemed fine, except it would time out trying to establish a dhcp connection.

Finally I figured, maybe Microsoft tried to troll me and lock out the ethernet waking on boot. So I restart my computer, load into windows and check my ethernet driver, it seems fine. I go to disable the shutdown of the card on OS shutdown. Turns out this driver no longer has that capability.

Wait a minute!? Windows is also having connection issues!?

I look to my left.

Fuck my life...

My router was off... I must of kicked the powerboard under my desk..........

you know what... I'm pissed... I'm fucking mad... this has gotten beyond the point of annoying... and I need to get off my chest... I AM LEARNING HOW TO PROGRAM ANYTHING FROM PYTHON TO C++ TO PHP not "wasting my time playing stupid games" for over 3 fucking years... I tell my parents and they just won't listen... like they think that they're right but they're not... this is my passion and my future life and they shake it off like it's nothing! fuck fuck FUCK! FUCK!!! I really need a stress ball or else I'll probably end up throwing my mouse across the fucking room...

Look at the 'k' in 'keyboard'... Fuck this fucking shit. I'm wasting my life with this stupid things

'rona virus working from home thug life.

MS Teams, several people including my PM, my company's sales lead, and the top brass from the client.

Sharing my center monitor with some technical documents etc.

A wild messenger message appears from my wife with the contents, "I'm gonna come home for lunch and fuck you sideways."

I'd put the amount of time it took me to mouse up there and flick that thing off the screen at about 900 miliseconds.

How fucked (in addition to sideways) am I?

Tl;dr ~ Fucked my wife. Fucked my life.

!dev && I'm fucking pissed

Bloody fucking mosquitos, FUCK YOU!!
If you couldn't evolve your shitty self over billions of years to be able to consume decent food instead of MY FUCKING BLOOD, then just let me fucking kill you already and eat my own fucking supper in peace!
MOTHERFUCKING PARASITIC ABOMINATIONS OF LIFE!!!

You know that you have fucked up another night when you are browsing devrant and your phone turns off the soft-color-night-mode because the sun has infact rise.

Fuck my life, another fucked up night and following day

Me doing monday morning Support because all of our fucking support members were not available.

Me: Can you navigate to the Installation path of our Software.

Customer: how?

Me: with the Windows File explorer

Customer: i dont have That

me: Explaining how to navigate to the install location (thinking: fuck my life)

FUUUCK I HATE FUCKING WORDPRESS AND PHP!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

I didnt change anyfuckingthing and everything went to shit! FUCK! FUCK YOU FUCKING FUUUUUCK!

Company wide ban on headphones at desks, because how can people be working if they're listening to music? Never felt so miserable in my life.

Fuck fuckitty fuck, with a side order of bollocks. May the senior management of this tight arsed tin pot cowboy outfit of a company all sleep soundly at their desks until Doomsday while the rest of us keep them in business. See, I'm not bitter...

Depressed.
I have never been so depressed in my life. Today I felt so sick, tired and numb.

Fuck depression.

My tip for staying productive: **Don't**

Take a break. Take a few. Have a nap. Take a stroll outside. Enjoy life.

Life's too short. If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong.

Fuck productivity.

FUCK YOU WORDPRESS

Omfg never been so fucking pissed in my life.

I just wasted 3 hours because this fucking bullshit rewrites the fucking URL based on the URL on a config fucking file?!!?

It fucking ignores: apache virtual host configs and nginx reverse proxy

omfg...

Who the fuck came up with the idea of using indentation instead of braces? I wasted 5 fucking hours of my life tracing a bug which eventually came down to incorrect indentation of a return statement which pushed it inside the loop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FML

And the PR has already been merged into master! How will I face everyone on Monday!

Just broke up with my girlfriend and it feels AWESOME! Like I’m free now! I finally can do what I like to!

Finally! To live without regrets and fears of not being able to entertain someone. It’s finally my thoughts, my music, MY life. My fucking life. Just me as is and it’s awesome. Finally, after three years of suffering.

FUCK YOU

Start to work, open laptop, open IDE, open editor, excited for coding, end up with youtube, fuck my life

Sooo... Cant drink coffee or energy drinks with my new medication.. FML

I fucking did it!!!!!!!

I fucking passed my last exam!!!!!!!!!!!

It fucking took me 6 YEARS of college to finally graduate a 4 year college!!!!!!!!!!!

I fucking have to do my finishing thesis before i get my degree!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!fcuck you

I fucking suffered so fucking much!!!!!!!!!!!

Last fucking exam was databases 1 and i fucking passeD ON THE FIRST TRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lick my balls play with them

WTF?????????????????????

I fucking spilled blood to get here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!shuh

I fucking am still mentally stunned!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fucking I cannot wrap my fucking head around what just fucking happened!!!!!!!!!!

I fucking expected to fail and take another exam next week but I PASSED??? ON THE FIRST TRY?????????????

My fucking gpa is shit BUT I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IM DONE WITH STUDYING COLLEGE!!! FOR EVER!! FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BRUH WTF THIS IS UNREAL IT FEELS LIKE I JUST SERVED THESE 25 YEARS OF PRISON AND NOW IM FINALLY GETTING OUT OF JAIL AFTER 25 FUCKING YEARS!! ALL MY LIFE I COULDNT DO SHJT I LOVED TO DO CAUSE I SACRIFICED MY LIFE TO SCHOOL. WAS IT WORTH IT? NO. FUCK THIS GOOFY AHH SHIT. I HOPE THIS DEGREE PAYS OFF CAUSE I DIDNT LEARN ALMOST SHIT IN HERE

Fuck my fucking life. Laptop of about 6 years is finally giving up on life and I don't have a big budget right now..

Anyone advice on a new pc? I want a desktop one this time. 16gb ram minimal.

😥

I am 21 and I just found out that I have rheumatoid arthritis in my fingers

I think a little part, no ,a huge chunk inside of me just died.

Why the fuck does life keep piling shit...
what's the fucking point....

When you been debugging over 3 hours and wonder... "What the fuck is wrong with my life"

Just tested my GPU code vs my non-GPU code.

Its a simple game of life implementation. My test is on a 80 x 40 grid running for 100,000 cycles.

The normal code took 117 seconds.
The CUDA code took 2 seconds.

Holy fuck this is terrifying.

Fuck you, you motherfucking fuck. How DARE you have the capacity to sell fake fucking chips on Amazon and make me fucking waste hours of my god damn fucking nights trying to program your shitty, lazy-ass implementation of an EEPROM.

I followed the datasheet specs down to the fucking microsecond just to find that nothing would write to the chip, and then spent hours of my goddamn life trying to figure out what I was doing wrong, making myself feel like a fucking failure for not being able to write 1s and 0s to a few pins. Fuck you, fuck you with a giant horse cock with needles on the tip

Why the fuck am I - who never had a girlfriend in his life - the person my friends come to to get relationship advice?

Well, I can tell them what no to do...

At first I thought fml means fuck my life but, it turns out, it means fuck machine learning.

God fucking dammit.

I got assigned to a WordPress project...

I AM NOT A WORDPRESS DEVELOPER!!!

Why do I have to deal with this giant pile of stinking shit?
I'm a php developer, I make applications, I don't write fucking wordpress plugins...
WHY DOES THIS EXIST, WHY DID WORDPRESS BECOME SUCCESSFUL WHY CAN'T I JUST DEV IN PIECE.

Dear wordpress developers,

Please suffocate on a big fat old cock.

Regards.

Me at midnight: let's release a demo build

Me at 1 am: why are there so many bugs? Why won't it compile.

Me at 2 am: omg finally compiled. Runs it, buttons don't work. Closes it, reopens it. Buttons work.

Me at 3 am: let's write apologetic posts for the bugs, but post the version anyway

Me at 4 am: why do I advertise in so many places

Me at 5 am: let's update the patreon reward tiers

Me at 5:30 am: nah fuck this, going to bed.

Mom at 9 am: wake the hell up we need you to dig out a hill and build a stone wall around one side of the house.

Me: omg wtf why.

Me at 2:30 pm: why the hell are we doing this, I have so many bugs to patch and everyone knows they are there because I told them all!

Have you ever lost 1,5 TB in few seconds? Well... Here I am... Fuck my life. Really, fuck it!

fuck you to the tech software engineer who would sexually harass me for over a year straight and would simply NOT GET THE FUCKING POINT that I'M NOT FUCKING INTERESTED.

Worst mistake of my life.

Brought in a meeting a really good idea. One guy out of 9 sayd, that it's stupid and we could not use it.

1 week later the same guy proposes the same idea to the boss and team. Took all the merit and when I confronted him, he denied, that it was first my idea.

Fuck my life...

Teacher: The next 3 months we're going to learn web dev
Me thinking: fuck yeah, finally, I love web dev.
Teacher 1 week later: shows us how to build with wix-like builder...

>Middle of night
>css not getting applied conditionally
>a simple ng-class
>me raging
>fuck angular's digest loop
>fuck dom and not giving parse errors
>fuck my life
>Coworker is also confused
>after 1hr, what it could be
>A typo, ifStudent->isStudent
>😑

I am quitting my job in the next couple of weeks. I don't even have a job lined up. I can't deal with doing Design work as a developer when you have a whole ass design team. Like what the fuck. Then I nearly do development. Oh and your gonna bitch at me when I mess up in design, then threaten to fire me? Well you can shove that shit all up your entire ass. Fuck this Job. I am doing my own thing. I don't care if I become homeless cause Fuck I'll be more happier I did that then be at this concentration camp. I am gonna live my life and own. Cause fuck everything corporate Jobs is fucking life sucking. Please Fire me. I GIVE NO FUCKS ANYMORE. Sick of being depressed and stressed. I want to be a real developer!!!! argghhhhhhhhhhhh

I feel strange, because I don't have nothing to rant about... I work with awesome people, and my life is not so terrible... What the fuck I'm doing on devRant?

Uhm... maybe I'm the boss who everyone is ranting about...

After refusing to work over 40 hours a week and refusing to work last Sunday, today I was fired. It's been the 2nd time in my life and it's been the same deal: totally unrealistic timelines and totally unrealistic work expectations.

No big loss. Fuck that place.

Had the first DDOS battle in my life lads, fuck me that was hard. I somehow managed to block these assholes, and some piece of shit was extorting money out of our business by messaging us in telegram. What a piece of shit.

When you try to clear term in messenger.

Fuck my life. I shouldn't be allowed to programming before midday.

As a total noobass with Linux I tried installing Arch. Why the fuck did I do that.

I fucked up the drive partitions, deleted the Windows boot loader and now neither Windows nor Arch fucking loads.

Can this get any worse

I used to get gigs from a freelancing website. Some guy posted a project where he wanted a website with complementary Android and iOS apps for $50. My bid was "Sir, would you like fries with that?". It was uncalled for I guess but after seeing so many projects like this, I was pissed to no end.

2 months later I get an email from the website saying I received an infraction due to my behaviour. Wtf is an infraction? Fuck you and fuck the English dictionary! Or pay me fucking 50 dollars to find out what it means!

Basically, I shat where I used to eat. Fuck my life.

Seriously fuck this place!

For this $200 per month job, i have to work ovetime and no travel allowance and boss begged me to work this sunday too..

Fuck my life

I just decided to do something productive today. Well... Fuck my life

My current company decided to do all automation in node.js.
Crawling, new projects, processes, all of it in Node.

Fuck my life.

Aye so i got a new job, and its android. I thought "yeah sure, ive been a java dev my whole life, it will be easy".

And it is easy.

But its like a fleshed out java, with a trillion built in classes and xml (seroiusly, fuck xml), and also the studio eats away my ram.

Me : *trying to download latest version of android studio*
Google: "Your client does not have permission to get URL /studio/index.html from this server. That’s all we know."
Me: FUCK YOU GOOGLE
Me: *googles: دانلود اندروید استودیو* (which means download android studio)
*and downloads it from a random website*

It happens every goddamn time, why the fuck i can't download this shit !? Because these countries are fighting each other all the time! What did i do wrong in my life? I just want to download your fucking app to write another shitty app to continue my fucking life. I don't know shit about this wars happening, I'm just a dev like others all over the world.
Downloading an app, is that too much to ask? Well fuck you then.

I am 30.

Just now I see that if I rewrite documentation of things I learn online with my own words (aka taking fucking notes) I learn with 5x quality.

For some reason I didn't do this most of my 20s.

what the fuck am I doing with my life?

What the fuck am I even doing with my life

Called in on a Saturday... I’d rather have my underwear ride up for the rest of my life than having to deal with your bitch ass not knowing how to run a FUCKING computer.

No, I promise it’s working fine you dense fuck. You just don’t know how to fucking run it. Perhaps instead of calling me in, why not ask your other coworkers how to preform the task that you’re failing to learn.

And the shit thing is, I’ve explained this so many fucking times. It’s not my fault you won’t retain the mother fucking information you cheeky bastard.

STOP FUCKING CALLING ME! - who the fuck even gave you my personal number you fuck!

34 days without any sugar (except for fruits). Am i a hero already, or should i go for 2-3 months?

Life is hard.

You are born. DNA gets determined. You go through infancy.

Puberty comes and DNA is like
"uh from now you'll pretty much have strong sexual urges, a huge desire to be sexually prolific, nothing weird like being pedo or into rape though".

me: Uh ok.
dna: oh, also, you're gonna be one of those late bloomers, you know, you talk like shit, you dress like shit, you smell like shit.
life: that's true and also you don't have anyone in your life to teach you about that shit, so forget about kissing, having sex, let alone being in a relationship for a long time.

*a lot of years go by with a lot of missed opportunities, mistakes and regrets*

life: ok, you seem to have become a decent sex partner out of a lot of scarring experiences, but there's one problem: you've fallen in love with somebody.

and you're married

and you have kids

me: well, does that mean I can't fuck other people?
life: yeah, no. I'm surprised I even have to explain that, it's called cheating. It will pretty much ruin your marriage, and fuck up your kids.

me: ok, I guess no then. I'm still fortunate enough to have sex with my wife right?

life: yeah... but you still want to fuck other people
me: what???
life: yeah, did you think that falling in love would make you not want to fuck other people? fuck no

me: ok, well I'm very grateful that I get to experience sex at all.
life: yes... there's a thing though, your partner has a much much lower libido than you.

me: ok, well maybe if I exercise and dress better that might change
life: that will definitely help, you'll feel more confident and have more stamina, but every time you retry exercising, you remember how much you hate it and how little stamina you have.
oh, I'm sorry, I forgot you had kids and work, yeah no time or energy for that.

me: ok, then should I just embrace a more liberal lifestyle, like becoming a swinger?
life: ha, fat chance, it's a very taboo thing and you're not that liberal, neither is she.

me: uhhh, i guess i can sometimes watch porn then...
life: watching porn regularly will make the only sex that you have worse, according to statistics.

me: ok, I guess I should get ripped

I want to build an Android app...
buuuut
- I hate NPM (NodeJS is neat, but NPM is annoying af)
- I hate Java
- I hate Dart
- I hate Windows

Fuck my life...

Me when I fuck up my sleep schedule badly by turning my life into a coding sprint and then trying to go normal

No dev rant but... Yeah!! 6 MRIs and 2 CT Scans. Fuck my life.

Fuck my life sometimes.
I'd just finished my work for an ongoing project, it's been over 6 months only to be dragged out to be told another system needs an immediate change which at best will take 3-4 weeks.

Like seriously just let my mind come off down from the completion of previous project before dropping a new barrel of insanity on my desk 😬

I like being busy, don't get me wrong. but damn not even a day of recovery 😓

Tomorrow is Monday and I don't feel like going to work. I have an ongoing project that is boring. Its 1AM and and am still awake. Have to wakeup at 5AM. God fuck my life.

Fuck life, fuck this society and especially fuck my brain - waking me up at 6 AM and immediately making me burst into tears because bipolar... I mean come on! I can't even sleep anymore?! I know it's hard falling asleep but waking me up just to cry? ...why...

Tonight is my school's prom and I'm the only one of my friends that's not going. My original date cancelled on me and the other one ended up getting a boyfriend and cancelled too. Oh well.

(Am I capable of posting about something other than my personal life? Holy fuck I don't have many posts that aren't about my personal shit)

It was sunny outside but the manacles that shackled me to the workstation were cold and biting particularly sharply this morning. I typed "fuck xcode" into the search engine. I found devRant. My life would be forever changed.

Fucking powershell.
Just make a fucking api call, and shove my json into a damn csv.
How fucking hard do you have to be 🤯

Deadline : Friday evening
Testing : There is only prod
Deploy : Friday evening
Why : Boss says customer wants it
Me : . . .

Fucking hate it when the moment I sleep, the "spaceX is live" notification awakens me and after 15 minutes of waiting, that bitch says "the plan rescheduled for next week". Don't you really know your fucking rocket has problems 10 minutes before takeoff? really? shit, Now I have to read some idiot rants to sleep again. Fuck my life.

Today I tried medication (concerta 36mg) for my ADD for the first time in my life (im 26 years old).

Result is fuck yeah! I feel like a human being whos able to focus on shit. Im so jealous of normal people having a decent attention span and decent working memory.

You don't know pain until you try writing a bash script using VIM ... on a ec2 instance ... WITH A SHIT ASS INTERNET CONNECTION

**slowly peels off face**

Fuck! I am never gonna get hired again. I fucking suck at live coding. My mind just fucking gets blocked. On simple shit like arrays. I still suck at regular expressions though. Fucking failed Amazon and now wayfare.!!!! Fuck my fucking god dam life.

I never thought I'd say this but I fucking hate my cousins and relatives.

Money and fame hungry people, constantly judging and excluding if you are not 'cool' enough. Give them attention, obey their orders, spend your money on them if you want to be considered human by them.

They spend 24x7 of their on Instagram with all their activities and gatherings revolving around the core idea of taking pictures and showcasing on Instagram.

All of them have inherited a fuck ton of fortune from their parents and live to spend. Nothing else in their life.

Their ideology is everyone should spend all their money and even if you have $5 in your savings, you are miser.

Cousins and relatives have bullied so much in my childhood that I had to go for therapy before I stabilised a little. They still fuck around and use me.

Now that I am living a better life than what I used to, they have started mocking my parents for it by shaming and excluding them from the family.

Not only I never wished ill but I prayed for their good health and success all my life. But all they did was neglect and ignore me.

Fucking blood sucking bastards. I still don't wish bad but I never thought I'd see this day where I'd hate them so much.

As I have worked really hard for my current life, because unlike them I had no fortune to be inherited, they pick some weak aspect of my life and poke it continuously to the point that it hurts me.

I never felt so alone. If not for my parents, I'd cut off all the times with such scums and move out for a better life with new people in life.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

I am not into motivation books but I was intrigued by a title.

Nice fucking book.
Found some improvements I can make in my life.

Author literally wrote he don’t give a fuck if you’re reading it or not.

For the first time I tried to use WordPress. I spent almost 30mins. Now I decided I should not use that again in my life. Fuck WordPress.

FUCK FIREBASE, FUCK CLOUD MESSAGING, FUCK GOOGLE, FUCK APPLE, FUCK PUSH NOTIFICATIONS, FUCK PROGRAMMING AND FUCK MY LIFE. JUST TELL ME MOTHERFUCKERS WHY NOTIFICATIONS IS NOT WORKING ANYMORE, I SWEAR I DIDN'T CHANGE A SINGLE LINE OF THE FUCKING CODE. AND IT'S BEEN ONLY ONE WEEK SINCE THE LAST TIME I TESTED IT.

First day of the academic year(CS):

(some uni official) - "And remember to become a good programmer you have to become an excellent mathematician first"

(Me): Oh shit.

Little did I know...

It is a second year now. And the only course I failed is the one that he lectured.

I had no fucking idea that people like this (mad)man exist.

Almost at every lecture he was introducing at leas one topic that was way beyond our program; as he thought they were interesting and "fun".

Many teachers at the University refered to him as a very 'ambitious' man. Then I didn't blame him he truly loved his profession and wanted to share as much knowledge as possible(I thought).

But two months ago he went to far. It was a second exam(for those who failed the first one). And believe me there were a few(60 out of 160 to be exact).

Only ~30 people showed up as the rest failed to many courses and would be kicked out of the uni anyway.

He was handing out the exams when I saw that whoever gets one slowly starts turning white.

I finally got my copy and immediately I realized that the tasks are from his favorite topics, the "fun" ones. 🤦

At this point I knew that it will be extremely hard to pass. But when I was reevaluating my life choices something draw my attention.

One of the tasks had a note below it: "Homework after the exam: It is a very interesting problem just assume x instead of y and try to solve it. PS: it is a lot of fun!"

At this point I lost it.😠 I don't care how much you love math, you should always assume that not everyone loves it as much as you do. So don't push it down the throat of people who clearly don't need a degree in this subject!

Now I'm preparing for the second semester with this guy. And I have a strong feeling that it will be hell of a ride... again.😐

BTW: Sorry that the rant is so long, it's the first one I wrote, and had to share it with someone 😀

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY YOU FUCKING SPYING SNEAKY LITTLE CUNTS?!?

This is the Calendar app that comes with my phone. Can't disable, uninstall, or change these slightly suspicious permissions. FUCK MY LIFE

Dear project managers.

Go fuck yourselves, stop hindering me in my ability to do my job. My job is to get the job done, I know exactly what exists where. If I request something, fucking get me it you useless cunts.

You're wasting time and resources with your lack of technical knowledge and making life difficult for the rest of us.

Sincerely, Frustrated Developers everywhere.

Fuck my life! For my studies at University it is required that I learn how to code... Over the past month I've been learning java, and yesterday a friend of mine has introduced me to Go. Now all I want to do is learn Go, meanwhile our Prof pushes us to learn switch-case and goto...

So... after a vision test on a whim, it turned out I needed glasses.

Turns out sitting in front of a screen all day did actually mess my eyes up 😂

Luckily I only need them for using the computer for extended periods of time, so managed to run them through my company as an expense.

Just got my first internship using Angular 1 today. Oh yeah, I’ve never in my life touched Angular. Fuck (:

when you see devs with age <= 16 who look experienced than you and you say to yourself

"Where the fuck have I spent my early life"

Actually finishing a project.

I am a person who gets a lot of ideas for projects I want to work on, then I start writing the code for them, then I reach a wall, stop and restart the cycle all over again.

Fuck my life.

My f*cking laptop died. Well, the HDD did. And now I'll be without a computer until I have replaced this f*cking piece of hardware. I kinda wanna die.

mom : i don't understand why my son became a nocturnal being..

father : son .. what the hell do you do entire night alone in your room with your lappy .. go get a gf or get married .. go get a life

relatives : beta (son in indian lang) my tv is not working can you fix it.. beta my internet is not working on my mobile (goddamnit turn on the mobile data for fuck sake )

When they tell you they put all the js code in a `core.js` file

Got married. Best day of my life. Woke up the next morning to my wife on one side and a fuck load of messages from my boss asking me to fix shit. Quit shortly thereafter.

Who the FUCK calls to get more information about a potential employee at fucking 8:20 AM? GO RECRUIT A LIFE AND DON'T BREAK MY SLEEP YOU FUCKING VULTURE

Oh my motherfucking God...
How the fuck can a dumb IDE be so fucking slow? I entered the office at 8:15. And I am still unable to checkout a motherfucking previous version of an android app in git and get Android studio to build it, because the fucking gradle is so damn slow it freezes the GUI. WHAT. THE. FUCK. Android studio get you shit together and maybe, just maybe don't be such a dick!!!

You need 5 min to open that project and another 10 to build it ONLY FOR ME TO REALIZE THAT I HAVE TO REPEAT THAT WHOLE PROCEDURE BECAUSE I NEED A DIFFERENT APP VERSION FROM THE GIT REPO FUCK YOU YOU SHITFACED STUPID COCKSUCKING CUNT, SHIT FUCK ARRRRGH!!!

Sincerely,
Me.

Edit: now it's 9:35 btw

Here it is.

The CS final.

I reached this point in my life.

I hope I won’t forget the base case in recursion like last time and fuck up an entire question.

First time doing web development for front end AND back end and I just want to say...

FUCK YOU YOU SHITTY ASS BOLLOCK DRIPPINGLY RETARDING CACHE, WHO YOU LOAD THINGS I NO WANT YOU TO LOAD...WHY THO?...

Well that was 2 hours of my life wasted....

So silicon valley ended. And Mr Robot is ending in 4 days. What the fuck am I gonna do with my life then?!

Recently not a single fucking thing is going my way...... Every goddamn new thing i try, screws me over in some way... And when I finally think somethings working, I get fucked more than a highway hooker.

Fuck-a-doodle-do Fuck Fuck Fuck what a fucking dipshit. Scared the god damn shit out of me.

So I am deep in code, listening to my music pounding out some code and Drupal configurations and I feel a shadowy draft over my right side like someone is watching me.

I work with a guy that will not for the fucking life of me use Slack to send me a message when I have my headphones on or at all for that matter.

He gets up and walks to my cubicle and just stares with a goofy fucking grin on his face. You know the one. LIke a retarded fucking dog eating shit out of a wire brush. Yeah that's the grin. Silently derping with his fucking derp ass Derp McDerpington face waiting on you to turn around an notice him there instead of knocking on the cubicle wall or waving to get your attention.

The FUCK dude? CreepyPasta

I have adhd and anxiety which means I cant smoke, drink coffee or drink alcohol because that fucks up my sleep and short term and long term memory badly for few days in a row. ADD symptoms become unmanageable. Fuck my life. I guess I will have to cut all stimulants if I want to be abe to function as a decent dev. I will have to cut most of my social circle because they wont understand me not going out for drinks... Fuck my life....

How do you celebrate GDPR? By having a breach

Fuck my life

When you work your ass out for days and night together for a feature. Rip your brains apart for that slimy thing to work.

And the client says it was not needed.
FUUUUCKKK

That moment when you make a suggestion. But client ignores you, and you end up building what they want.

Then an asshole comes along and presents the thing that you suggested, and has the balls to say they made it. When you can clearly see that it's the prototype you made!

At least it's Friday...

My laptop battery is absolute rat-shit, it drains half of itself when I try to copy a large file...

Fuck you windows 10. Fuck you private keys. Fuck you tortoise git. Fuck you git bash. Fuck you cygwin. Want 3x hours of my life back. Had an auth problem... Had to reinstall all the above on windows to connect to my private repo. Took me 5 minutes to connect after reinstalling all the tools. Grrrrrrr. And I'll never know why it wouldn't connect apart from fatal protocol error: bad line length character..I tried ever stack overflow answer... I nearly bricked my gitlab CE...and it was windows being a motherslut

This is a very mild rant about character limit saying that there are >0 characters left when writing comments, then refusing to submit.

I'm so fucking infuriated! I almost raised an eyebrow in anger! What the fuck, my life is literally ruined, this bug is making my toilet visits insignificantly worse!

So my time saver automation can not be used because automation is not reliable.

Yeah sure make me extract data manually from 800 urls by hand and see if there is no human error.

Fuck my life.

FUCK YOU LIFE!
YOU LEFT ME 3 HOURS WALKING IN THE COLD TO GET TO MY HOME FROM MY FUCKING INTERNSHIP!
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS ORGANIZE EVERYTHING SO THAT I.E. TODAY THE BUS DOES NOT ARRIVE AT THE BUS STATION??!?!??!?!?!!
I ALWAYS DON'T HAVE LUCK. WHATEVER I DO... I (ALMOST) ALWAYS FAIL AT IT (not talking about skill-related stuff! fuck you!)

I fcking hate when my friends come to me for restoring his stupid blocked accounts like Instagram, Facebook, Google etc... OMG I'm a fcking computer technician not a hacker

FUCK MY LIFE!

MY DEPARTMENT IS IN SEARCH OF 3 PYTHON DEVS (1 expert, 2 "normal") FOR DEVELOPING AUTOMATIC THINGS!!! I would seriously apply because it's like my first dev job without having attended University.

But only for two years... After that I have to reapply for my old job.. but it's two (expert 3) salary groups up from mine...

What to do?

Also fuck python but I would learn it for God's sake

When the fuck I am gonna get some time for me?.... where is my life?😖

ah shit, here we go again

fuck my life

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK LAMBDA CALCULUS IS??!?!?!

I swear to fuck, nothing makes you feel more like an idiot than trying to understand functional programming after living all your life in the oop world.

Fucking meta-functions and alligator games.

Fuck this, I'm going back to my happy little Java world

I don't like others to know that i'm a programmer. Do you agree or why shall they know? It just changes their opinion on you.

!dev

I just fucking hate people that have 10 years without talking to me and write me to ask for a favor.
Starting like: hey man how are you doing? Like you give a fuck about the shithole I'm at, just tell me what a fuck do you want and let me go back to my life.

Have to present a school project I've been working in for three weeks with my team.

My part of the presentation is done, my part of the project is done.
The fucking sysadmin doesn't have his fucking part ready...

ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS SET UP A FUCKING WEBSERVER, IMPORT A DATABASE, EDIT THE HOST FILE AND WRITE A SMALL 2 PAGE DOCUMENT ON THE INFRASTRUCTURE.

Each of the 4 "roles" within the project need to present their own part, guess whose part of the presentation isn't there...

I am so fucking done with this guy and 2 others in the team...

I just don't get how you can spend 1000's of € per year on uni and then not take it seriously.

I hate my fucking job but I can't resign as I can't afford myself financially. Fuck my life

Hi all,

This might be a long post so bear with me. I work for a company and there was a project for a huge client. I'm junior in skill (been programming for about two years) but my job title doesn't reflect that. Anyways, I got the design about a month ago but I was on deadline for two other projects so I couldn't pick it up until last week Wed. Ironically, that's when the final design was delivered & told me it was due next week Wednesday. I built it as fast as I could. Finished mobile but for some reason, this last part for desktop just wasn't working out and it just so happens to be the most crucial part of the piece. (I was also sick the entire time and didn't sleep for the last two days nor did I eat). I was supposed to demo it yesterday but I still needed to make a few updates and the project coordinator took me off the project & gave it to a dev with more experience. This has never happened to me before. I'd go as far as to say this is my first big fuck up. I've always delivered on deadline and I'm taking this pretty hard. Has anyone been in similar situations? What do I do? Any advice?

So we work on a Vmware network. And besides the terrible network lag. The specs of that VM is one core (Possibly one thread of a xeon core) and 3 GB RAM.

What do we do on it?
Develop heavy ass java GUI applications on eclipse. It lags in every fucking task. Can't even use latest versions of browsers because the VM is a fucking snail ass piece of shit!

So, in the team meeting I proposed to my manager, Hey our productivity is down because of this POS VM. Please raise the specs!.

He said mere words won't help. He needs proof.

Oh, you need proof ? Sure. I coded up a script that all of my team ran for a week. That generates a CSV with CPU usage, mem left, time - every 10 min. I use this data to show some motherfucking Graphs because apparently all they understand is graphs and shit.

So there you go. Have your proof! Now give me the specs I need to fucking work!

> Am writing code
> Life is good
> Add debugger keyword
> Script pauses
> Type in var name... Undefined.
> ...What?
> Check out local scope. It's there. What the fuck?
> Add console.log(myVariable)
> Refresh
> Logs variable no problem. Cool.
> Type in my var name
> Undefined

FFFUUUUUUU-

I learned computer science so i can create a small game some day. I spend my entire time on web development coz thats what makes money in my lame ass country. I come home too tired to go into game development which is an entire world to explore by itself. Cant apply to other countries coz game development companies wont recruit a web developer (i tried). Fuck my life

Rust is beautiful. Rust is also extremely difficult to understand. What the fuck are lifetimes?! I’ve never seen this shit before in my life.

Fuck me. Upgraded a java project from java 11 to java 17 and now the shitload of power mockito tests are all failing because they locked down reflection. Now I have to upgrade to junit 5 and waste my life looking at these stupid unit tests. I sense a large purge approaching.

That moment when you just quit your successful paying job just to have more time to study and try to pass the fucking piece of trash math exam.

Fuck my asshole, fuck my life and fuck that motherfucking college degree. If I don't pass, I will eventually kill my self or quit college.

Jeez, I wonder what was in my head when I enrolled in college, oh wait.. Parents, society brainwashed me to think I need top tier education to be a successful computer programmer engineer.

Fuck you society, fuck my brain, fuck everything.

FFFFFFFUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKK!
endRant();

Create my own company and finally release my app. Quit my current job and eventually start doing whatever the fuck I WANT rather than whatever the fuck I HAVE to.

I have only one life. Is it that much to ask to have it for myself, not sold to someone else?

Giving up expectations of people.

People don't know what the fuck they want, so what made me think they could actually deliver anything? Idk, but it doesn't matter now, my life has been easier since I stopped caring.

Fuck my life!!! Fuck it right hard!!! My fucking compiler (the one I code) fucking broke down, and i have to put it to competition it two weeks... Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck: obviously Iost backup and gitHub doesnt seem like wanting to give me that version back... Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck duck!!!!

At my workplace, we are working on the codebase from 1999. It's built on Oracle Forms and Reports. Fuck my life 😔

I need new monitor
Extra ram
new mechanical keyboard

ooh fuck it i cant afford that
my life sucks !

Linux on the 3DS is going well. Others have no issue at all, but I've gotta fix issues with the toolchain executables being named wrong, the provided, precompiled toolchain everyone else uses being the wrong one and being incompatible...

Fuck my life.

Wasted 2 hours of my life trying to make an actionbar display white text on a dark background after migrating the legacy code from ActionBarSherlock to the supportactionbar.

And guess what? That fucking actionbar still displays black text.
What. The. Fuck.

Giving up on this for today...

Spent ten plus years professionally coding, used c, go , python, openwhisk ,docker, kubernetes and God know what else. Now I have to convince those team members who coded so far in their free time that write fucking clean code, avoid dependency on distributed and hard coded configuration, how to build a product
Fuck my life

92% download..
internet goes down
restart it!!
fuck my life

its seems like ill lose my gf if i start my cs study cuz ill not earn money in this period.. wtf!?
is this dev life?
console.log ("fuck you") ;

Why is learning a new language from python such a bitch? Like, w h a t t h e f u c k. Syntax can eat my ass with that semi colon no semi colon bullshit. Also fuck the compiler with it always having an error and shit. I was lowkey just trying to compile the shortest shit but cant get through s h i t. Fuck life I swear I'm gonna shoot my computer if I get another error.

I cant believe its impossible to find a dev job even with a computer science degree. What have I wasted 6 years of my life for then if no one values a degree? Fuck you

I dedicated one day of my life to install Hackintosh in dual boot… with no success. FUCK.

Doesn't work
I hate my life
fuck this shit
Oh I used the wrong list
*jumps from the top of the mountain*

It's the best thing ever where watching one tutorial doesn't work. So you go to another. Then you see a suggested video that's unrelated to your current task, but it's a short video. So you quickly watch it.

Boom. Next thing you know, it's fucking 45 minutes later and you just watched some random ass dude's entire fucking life story in his vlogs.

Fuck my life an Adderall would be fantastic right now.

Been using Linux for years now and only now just discovered appimage's... Fuck me where have you been all my life?!

It's like snap and flatpak but not slow and shit!

Follow-up to my last rant... The HDD is still not booting. I'm afraid it really is fucked up. (The screenshot is TestDisk doing a Deeper Search, and showing a shitload of Invalid FAT Boot Sectors)

My paper just got rejected. Again. The first time it was expected. But for this journal, it wasn't supposed to be. Some of the reviewers' comments are stupid. (for eg. I mention a no-loss algorithm fir a game which, so his/her comment is like what's no-loss? , like are you fucking kidding me, if you don't know that, then why are you a reviewer in the first place)

Anyway now I don't know what to do. I'm looking for more journals but all have so high impact factors and I'm not even sure confident to submit again. Had a good mind to mail the editor in chief but well, I don't think it'd help. What do you guys think?

In the middle of another project, another paper, online courses, now this. I'm just done. I didn't go home as well. It's around four o' clock in the morning here, so noone here is awake.

Can anyone hear me?

How did my life went from "Fuck Drupal" to "All hail Drupal"? 🤔

I literally just deleted all (50+) of my college research files from chrome bookmark folder by accident but after a small research I landed on this article from HTG and by following instructions from there I successfully restore it. Fuck I've never felt so blessed in my fucking life.

Just ran "rm -rf <project_folder>" instead of "rm -rf <project_folder>/Library/PackageCache"

I'm almost afraid to open the project itself right now

I stopped it like a second later, but still it has deleted some project configuration :(

300 fucking people.

and only 120 are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING while everyone else can go fuck themselves in a COMPUTER SCIENCE COLLEGE

why is this restricted so much

why such a small amount of people are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING

are you telling me i sacrificed my time and wasted 2 years of my life on college because i wanted to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING, just so i can go fuck myself after 2 years?

someone explain this to me

this is unacceptable

After about 7 hours continuous work in any one day, I’ve kinda had enough and noticed that work beyond this point is usually shit. I stopped trying and think fuck it now. Deadlines are mainly bollocks anyway. My life is a lot better because of it. Don’t do today what you can put off til tomorrow.Who’s with me?

After 3 weeks of being interviewed on upwork she replied today and told me

"Sorry, the only reason we cant hire you is because the client wants only EU passport devs"

.....

Is this my fault? How is this my fault? EVERY FUCKING TIME WHEN I TRY TO SUCCEED AT ANYTHING LIFE JUST FORCEFULLY REJECTS ME FROM SUCCEEDING AND IT IS ALWAYS BECAUSE OF THE LUCK THAT I DONT HAVE. HOW IS IT MY FAULT FOR BEING BORN IN A GARBAGE BULLSHIT PIECE OF SHIT COUNTRY AND IMMEDIATELY HAVE HUGE DISADVANTAGE IN LIFE? HOW IS THAT FUCKING FAIR??? WHY DO YOU GIVE A FUCK FROM POLITICAL REGIONS WHERE I AM BORN IF I CAN DO THE DEV JOB RIGHT????? WHST RHE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING LOW LIFE ABOUT IF I ***NEED*** LUCK TO BECOME SUCCESSFUL. NO MATTER HOW SKILLED OR HARD YOU TRY YOU WILL ALWAYS APPARENTLY FAIL IF YOU ARE MISSING ***LUCK***

When I go to sleep, driving my car, or when I am distracted with some hobbies my mind give me some ideas and motivation for doing programs and games.
Then I switch on my PC and my laziness come from holidays to fuck my projects and doing anything.
Idk why.
I need help? Or my life as programmer sucks?

Omg I have to check 2350 svn commits.

We have 2 seperated frontends, one for maintaining old UI and one for new UI which is going to production in one month. So now I have to check if any CR/bug was implemented/fixed only on old UI. Frontend2 was created last year on july. Fuck my life

Booted my laptop in windows 10. Forced to install the new updates. Ubuntu partition got deleted.
Fuck my life, how can get Microsoft away with that? That's so stupid. Now neither Ubuntu nor windows 10 is booting and I have to perform a boot repair and recovery with a live CD...

I am a web app developer by profession and software engineer by qualifications but when there is a problem with router, firewall or a server needs to be setup, whether internal or for client, all my employer can see is me. Sometimes i get too tired of this shit. Also I am expected to work at home during night as if I don't have any life outside this field. I need to enjoy my life with I am young. I am twenty and stuck. Fuck it.

I just spent 4 hours troubleshooting 2 pcs, neither of them working yet. I'm way too tired, and I'm not even sure what I'm saying is correct English but I don't care. Man, fuck my life. I just wanna go to bed, but my brain doesn't think that's a good idea

Never had a more stressful day of dev in my life. After shooting off about half a million emails today to clients who decide that they want their sites to go live over the long easter weekend (fuck knows why they all want it this weekend) I just need some beer and some Zelda. I love this job but sometimes it kills me

Dev: Please let us know when will be a good time to make a DNS switch for launching the site?
Client: ok
...
....
Client: one hour later, hey I did a DNS switch to your server but the site is not there?!
Dev: (Fuck me running!!) fuck fuck fuck fuck and fuck my life!

How fucking hard is it to write simple documentation with everything you need to get something working for fucks sake. Several fucking hours of my life later and I'm still no closer to figuring out what the fuck is going on with something that should simple. FUCK!!

I want to fucking strangle my past self to death. Why the hell didn't you use typescript you dumb fuck? Your life would be way easier now.

Got my RC522 RFID reader for a school project last night, got it to work, tried to plug it into my breadboard this morning and shorted it... Double checked on 2 different arduinos and 1RPi 3 B didn't work on either one of them.

Fuck my life.

Babel and webpack kicked my ass today. fuck you babel, and fuck u too webpack. neither one of u fucks is making my life any better at the moment. things were moving along, now my app just looks like this. something in this transpile garbage. I'm not missing '>' . it's just not transpiling correctly I think.

Now finally im in a phase of my life..... Where.... I dont know what the fuck is going on anymore 🤣🤣🤣🤣

why is everybody posting about wordpress & php?
fuck my life
fuck php
fuck $300 freelance wordpress websites

Some notes from some interviews
1. I don’t read minds
2. I can either talk or think

My Phone crashed (22%) while I was trying to send a picture of my bluescreen. (Phone needs to be charged) - fuck. my. life.
Damn driver updates. Damn 5yo iPhone.

Damn it!!! Fuck! That's 2 hours of my life I'm never getting back... FUCK!

{"op":"replace","path":"/spec/template/spec/containers/0/resources/limit/cpu","value":"4.0"}

I was failing all the test cases for a CS assignment where we had to implement our own methods for strings in C++. After an hour of debugging, turns out strings don’t end with ‘/0’ in C++ like in C.
Fuck my life.

Just wasted 30 mins of my life wondering where the fuck this bug is coming from. This is why i fucking hate javascript.

i think i just hit my limit after 5 years of no breaks or time off between finishing my studies and working 2 jobs sleep deprivation these last couple of weeks I'm barely able to work can't wake up either I've been sleeping 4-5 hours for a while. now i can truly say Fuck My Life.

Well my software update came through correctly, but now it crashes everywhere 😠😠 (Follow up on last Friday).

Me: "But what if I fuck it up?"
Him: "Well, don't fuck it up".

When asking about what the user should do next in case they make a mistake and wanted to correct it.

It was a turning point in my dev life.

Well.. I Guess i can't use apt-get anymore then...

I try to use apt-get ( image at top)

It does not work. Libc6 needs to be
reinstalled.

I try to install a libc6 package i downloaded from packages.debian.org
(image at bottom)

An error occurs.

Fuck My life!

I told the designers how a web works a hundred times.
I thought they got it.
Today they handed me a "web design" as an InDesign file.

I just graduated and now I don't know what the fuck to do with my life