Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
Just reached 100+!!
Anyhow. I started coding prettymuch 365 days ago. My mate decided to launch his company and figured it was a good idea to start it with good friends who knew fuck all at coding.
Fyi, the dude can code 15 hours straight everyday for about a year (no shit thats what i saw).
Since he taught me html css javascript(even if i still suck abit at js). He made me remake the whole bootstrap in react by adding this new lib styled-components and test everything(95% coverage :)).
He also taught me webpack and rollup. Json schma forms，http requests redux， redux logic， and all the routing shit...he obliged me to i plement RR4 on release and is now making me overlook the merge requests of my other collegue (yes he made me a git pro，almost).
And now i have to work long distance by studying java， spring， oauth2 and start working on our api.
O yeah，and i went from microsoft to full on linux!!!
To be honest i thought i was gonna die this year. (Also have a kid on the way :)).
Devrant has been like going to the psychologist :) everytime shit hit the fan i realized every one has the same problems :)
Thanks to the community i can also now even give out nerd jokes :)
(L)Devrant11 -
FUCK PEOPLE ON STACKOVERFLOW ANSWERING JAVASCRIPT QUESTIONS WITH FUCKIN JQUERY SOLUTIONS! IF I EVER WANT JQUERY I WILL TELL YA!
NOW GTFO AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!!!15 -
I actually hate this job, seems like there's not a single project with decent code abstraction. Everything is a fucking spaghetti like:
```
// we only care about e-mail fields, which are odd
isValid(index) {
if(!(index%2)) {
return true;
}
...
}
```
Like MOTHERFUCKER, WHAT BUSINESS RULE DOES THIS SHITCODE REFLECTS?!?! WHY CAN'T YOU SHITHEADS WRITE PROPER BUSINESS ABSTRACTION RATHER THAN JUST COLLEGE-GRADUATE QUALITY SHITCODE.
FUCKING KILL ME ALREADY I SHOULD HAVE INSTEAD BECAME A PSYCHIC CAUSE I'M SURELY GOOD AT GUESSING WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK THIS FUCKING FUCKCODE INTENDS TO ACHIEVE.
AND YOU CALL YOURSELF TOP-NOTCH DEV CAUSE THIS IS JAVASCRIPT... YOU KNOW WHAT, SHITHEADS LIKE YOU, WHO DON'T KNOW SHIT OTHER THAN GLOBALLING EVERY FUCKING NPM LOCAL PACKAGE IS WHY GOOD ENGINEER LIKE US GET SHIT FROM PHPEPSI ZENDFRAMESHIT FUCKHEADS DEVS.
DO YOU THINK YOUR COMMENT WAS HELPFUL??? DO I LOOK LIKE A BUSINESS GRADUATE FUCKTARD WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THE MODULE OPERATOR IS??? I WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU WROTE THAT SHITFUCK INSTEAD OF WHAT IT DOES; THE REASON I'M READING YOUR POORLY WRITTEN MODULE OPERATOR SOAP-OPERA IN THE FIRST PLACE IS CAUSE I KNOW WHAT IT'S DOING, IT'S BREAKING SHIT.
OH AND ONE MORE THING, FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK FUCKSHIT SHITFUCK FUCk11 -
Teacher: Homework for next time is to make 2 web pages with three javascript.
* whole class is quiet *
Me: What's "three JavaScript"
T: undefined
M: Do you mean three files?
T: No, I mean three JavaScript.
M: Okay, so let's go with five CSS and twelve HTML as well then...
Please, go somewhere else when you can't explain your OWN HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT. Holy fuck.16 -
Fuck MatLab. Fuck Mathworks. Why the fuck do I still have this fucking piece of shit on my computer? Even its logo makes me want to puke.
You think JavaScript is bad? Try MatLab, JavaScript will look like a saint.
You are still virgin? Try MatLab, it will fuck you hard.
Give me one fucking engineer who has to use MatLab and love its nonsense, I dare you!31 -
FOR FUCK SAKE...
The same fucking guy that said Java and JavaScript is the same thing tried inserting RAM into the PCIe slot twice! It doesn't even look like it will fit at first sight.8 -
Interview : alright .. your backend experience match us perfectly. Now tell me about ur experience with JavaScript !
Me replying without thinking :
Fuck JavaScript !
Interview : 😮😦 !!
Me : 🤐😨
Interview : alright then, u are in the short list and will get back to u for your second interview.8 -
Friend: So you're like a Developer right? Specifically using JavaScript?
Me: I mean...kinda? Pretty Noobish still...
Friend: But you could like show a buddy of mine some basics right?
Me (thinking to myself...the best way to test your knowledge is to teach it...): well...sure...
Friend: Great here is their info!
*Drives an hour away*
*sits down with this friend of a friend*
*busts out laptop*
Friend of friend: So how long have you been a Java Developer?
Me: -_- oh fuck...
*head desk*15 -
I hate everybody who says JavaScript is the best language because of loose typing and its easy to learn, YES OF COURSE IT IS EASY!
ITS FUCKING JAVASCRIPT! IT WAS MEANT TO BE EASY! AND THEN SOME ASSHOLE CAME ALONG, CREATED NODE AND THOUGHT THAT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA!
NOW WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT EVERYWHERE BECAUSE PEOPLE WHO WROTE CODE FOR UX NOW THINK THEY KNOW WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN ON THE SERVERSIDE!!
GOD FUCKING DAMNIT I HATE THIS ANALTOY OF A LANGUAGE.
YOU THINK JAVASCRIPT IS THE BEST?! DO YOU REALLY??!!! OH YEAH!?!
WELL FUCK YOU AND GO TO HELL, YOU ARE NOT A DEVELOPER IN MY EYES, GO HOME KIDDO, LEARN C OR ASM OR HOW A FUCKING COMPUTER ACTUALLY WORKS!!
AND THEN TELL ME AGAIN JAVASCRIPT IS A WELL DESIGNED AND PROPER LANGUAGE!!
I'M OUT!32 -
Yesterday was Friday the 13th, so here is a list of my worst dev nightmares without order of significance:
1) Dealing with multithreaded code, especially on Android
2) Javascript callback hell
3) Dependency hell, especially in Python
4) Segfaults
5) Memory Leaks
6) git conflicts
7) Crazy regexes and string manipulations
8) css. Fuck css.
9) not knowing jack shit about something but expected by others to
produce a result with it.
10) 3+ hours of debugging with no success
Post yours27 -
Fuck javascript
Fuck css
Fuck even html
And fuck web dev in general.
i can't do this shit anymore.
i've been working in web for ~2.5 years, 4 different companies, countless frameworks, technologies and tools and it feels good having that kind of knowledge and ability to do anything in this field, but god damn. I'm exhausted of "moving pixels" most of the time.
And i know, maybe different company and position would better suit me, but how often do people hire pure breed back-enders ? not that often, at least not in my country. Everyone has to do everything. And even then, php/sql/sysadmin/devops work doesn't motivate me as much. I need something that would make me actually think.
And so i decided to change my specialty, i'm going to follow my long lived dream - game dev (C++) :)
Oh i know, i'm not naive. I know how difficult and hard it is, but it seems like i've finally matured for it. So i've been waking up at 5 a.m and learning for ~3 hours before work for a few weeks now, and plan to go part-time at my work, after a few months (need to save up some money) for ~6 months, to focus on C++
Then hopefully i'll be able to land a junior position. If not, well, i wouldn't be a problem solver if i let that get to me :)14 -
Software company director: we build Java applications right?
Devs: nah, javascript.
Director: it's the same, right?
Devs: no
Director: fuck, I pitched a Java application.
A few hours later...
Director on the phone: Yeah, we are building it in Java...10 -
My company wants to start using Node.JS.
JavaScript.
They wanna use JavaScript.
For everything.
JAVASCRIPT.
FOR EVERYTHING.
Scene;
**Asshat enters break room after meeting**
**Asshat turns to Asshole**
Asshat: “Oh here in a year or two we’ll just be rewriting all of this is Node.JS.”
Asshole: “JavaScript. You’ll be rewriting it in JavaScript. And fucking WHY?”
Asshat: “It’s better”
Asshole: “It’s not really a general use language. Why wouldn’t you guys choose Python if you wanted to write EVERYTHING in a goddamn scripting language?”
Asshat: “Google uses Node.JS”
Asshole: “For back-end web development type stuff. I doubt their accounting systems are written in fucking JavaScript...”
Asshat: “Python is oooooold.”
Asshole (to himself): No you’re old, you stupid, ancient fuck.
**Asshole rolls his eyes and walks away**
**Asshat continues his ignorant chuckling**
End Scene;
Clearly years of fixed format RPG programming has killed too many of Asshat’s brain cells.12 -
Talking to Best Buy customer support live chat trying to price match using friend’s laptop.
Typed in “<b>Hello</b>”
Oh cool.. it comes out as bold. Let’s get a scary as fuck screamer gif and img src it.
Me: *Posts picture*
Me: *Waits a few seconds*
Me: “Did you see that picture?”
Support: “No. Sir, could you tell me the item you want to price match?”
Me: “Okay hold on.”
Typed in “<script type=‘text/javascript’>window.alert(‘OOGA BOOGA BITCH’);</script>”
Me: “Did you see that?”
Friend: “Dude stop.”
I push my friend away since I’m on his Best Buy account.
Me: “Did you see a pop up?”
Support: “No.”
Me: “Okay okay hold on.”
You have left the chat.10 -
Dude chaining in JavaScript is so fucking ugly but so trendy.
thing.doStuff().doThing().then().doMoreStuff().orDont()
Like fuck off with that.25 -
I always hate going back to C++ after using JavaScript for long periods of time. I'm always like, "Fuck I just wanna split this string!"3
-
I send a PR to your GitHub repo.
You close it without a word.
I tell you that your lib crashes because you're trying to parse JavaScript with a (bad) regex, but you keep insisting that no, there exist no problem, and even if you barely know what "parsing" means, you keep denying in front of the evidence.
Well fuck you and your shitty project. I'll keep using my fucking fork.
And if you're reading this, well, fuck you twice. Moron.10 -
I hate it when clients force me to fix their fucking magentos with crappy javascript fuckarrounds because the shop is already a huge pile of fuck with window resize events fucking up all onservers. 4 jquery includes all messed up fucking each other in a cum gobbling bukkake because you never know which jQuery, $j, jsm or jFuckYou is bound to which library. I know i have to spill my own fuck all over that fuck. Frontpage slider is raping the search results for slides leaving dead meat in the results foreever. Fuck your fucking fuck you fucking fucker.7
-
DO NOT USE JAVASCRIPT FOR PUBLIC WEBSITES IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE IT!!!
Almost every fucking day, I click a fucking button and NOTHING HAPPENS. I open the console and find tens of JavaScript errors, that *I* have to debug and fix in order to proceed.
FUR FUCK SAKE, JavaScript is not strictly needed, those fucking React and Vue are also not needed. Just now I wanted to download a form: IT'S A FUCKING PDF FILE, why the fuck are you putting your broken JavaScript function to let me download it!? PUT A FUCKING DOWNLOAD LINK YOU FUCKING MORON!
Nobody is forcing anybody to use JavaScript or those fucking fancy frameworks, SO WHY THE FUCK PEOPLE OVERCOMPLICATE THINGS THAT USED TO WORK SO WELL!14 -
Got fired.
Fuck
3 days on the job...
Told on the interview I didn't know the machine OS but I could learn in a few days...
Well they want someone with experience on that machines I don't know...
It's like asking a Javascript programmer to work with Java...
Whatever...
There are more companies11 -
I’m a .NET desktop fullstack dev these days… Never worked web unless for my own small needs/personal projects.
I started using tech one way or the other by the time windows was version 3.1 and been through quite a bit ground-breaking changes in the industry of software development and the internet but if there’s one thing I cannot understand of it all, no matter how much thought I put into it is: How the fuck did we manage to make it so fucking complicated to develop anything these days?
I remember like it was yesterday that you could stand a website with HTML, CSS and JS, three fucking files and you’ve made yourself a single page site. Then came the word “Responsive”, “Responsive” written everywhere. Fair enough, grid system popped up. All of the sudden jQuery was summoned… and everything that happened after this point has been a fucking circus of high-pitched teens talking on conferences about fucking libraries and frameworks to make integration with real time, highly scalable, eco-friendly, serverless, data driven, genome aware, genderless, quantum technologies to interact with bio dynamically generated organisms, namely fucking users.
Every fucking bit of the process of building a mobile/web application seems to be stopped by yet another incredibly dumb attempt to suicide a developer. Can you go from starting an app and publishing an app without jumping through a thousand VERY specific hoops? No, fuck no.
I fucking hate it… It’s a bit hard to get Desktop dev jobs these days but for as long as I work on IT I will continue to stick to that area, until someone for the love of life comes up with a fucking solution to all this decadent circus of bureaucratic technocracy.
Fuck big industry, fuck tech giants, fuck javascript and webassembly, fuck kids putting ASCII art on console applications that I DON’T FUCKING NEED to install dependencies THAT I DON’T FUCKING NEED to extend functionality on frameworks that I DON’T FUCKING NEED… oh wait, I do need all this because YOU FUCKING MADE IT MANDATORY NOW! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!!!9 -
Fuck code.org. Fuck code. Not code code, but "code" (the word "code"). I hate it. At least for teaching. Devs can use it as much as they want, they know what it means and know you can't hack facebook with 10 seconds of furiously typing "code" into a terminal. What the fuck are you thinking when you want me to hack facebook? No, when I program, it's not opening terminal, changing to green text and typing "hack <insert website name here, if none is given, this will result to facebook.com>" Can you just shut the fuck up about how you think that because you can change the font in google fucking docs you have the right to tell me what code can and can't do? No, fuck you. Now to my main point, fuck "code" (the string). It's an overused word, and it's nothing but a buzzword (to non devs, you guys know what you're talking about. how many times have you seen someone think they are a genius when they here the word "code"?) People who don't know shit don't call themselves programmers or devs, they call themselves coders. Why? It fucking sounds cool, and I won't deny that, but the way it's talked about in movies, by people, (fucking) code.org, etc, just makes people too much of a bitch for me to handle. I want everyone reading this rant who has friends who respect the fact that YOU know code (I truly believe everyone on devRant does), how it works, and it's/your limitations, AND that it takes hard work and effort, to thank god right now. If you're stuck with some people like me, I feel you. Never say "code" near them again. Say "program." I really hate people who think they know what an HTML tag is and go around calling themselves coders. Now onto my main point, code.org. FUCK IT. CAN YOU STOP RUINING MY FUCKING AP CS CLASS. NO CODE.ORG, I DON'T NEED TO WATCH YOUR TEN GODDAMN VIDEOS ON HOW TECHNOLOGY IS IMPORTANT, <sarcasm>I'VE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK FOR THIRTY YEARS</sarcasm>. DO I REALLY NEED ANOTHER COPY OF SCRATCH? WAIT, NO, SCRATCH WAS BETTER. YOU HAD FUCKING MICROSOFT, GOOGLE, AND OTHER TECHNOLOGICAL GIANTS AND YOU FUCKED UP SO BAD YOU MADE IT WORSE THAT SCRATCH. JUST LETMECODE (yes I said that) AND STOP TALKING ABOUT HOW SOME IRRELEVANT ROBOT ARM DEVELOPED BY MIT IS USING AI AND MACHINE LEARNING TO MAKE SOME ROBOT EVOLVE?! IF YOU SPEND ONE MORE SECOND SAYING "INNOVATION" I'LL SHOVE THAT PRINT STATEMENT YOU HAVE A SYNTAX ERROR UP YOUR ASS. DON'T GET ME FUCKING STARTED ON HOW ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO ANYTHING FOR YOURSELF WHEN YOUR GETTING ALL THE ANSWERS WITHOUT DOING ANY WORK AND THE FACT THAT JAVASCRIPT IS YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE. <sarcasm>GREAT IDEA, LETS GET THESE NEW PROGRAMMERS INTO A PROFESSIONAL ENVOIRMENT BY ADDING A DRAG AND DROP CODE (obviously we can say it) EDITOR</sarcasm> MAYBE IF YOU GOT THIS SHIT UP YOUR ASS AND TO YOUR BRAIN YOU'D ACTUALLY GET TO PRPGRAMMING IN YOUR ADVANCED AP COURSE. ITS CALLED FUCKING CODE.ORG FOR A REASON32
-
I spent yesterday refactoring a JavaScript file and it was so fucking bad that I wasn't containing my frustration to the point it git blamed it to make sure I wasn't "wtfing" my boss's code, I wasn't so I went on a rampage.
Anyone who looked at me yesterday would see a pissed off dev with the highest rate of wtf/minute to the screen gesturing and force palming constantly.
I'm a back end dev.
I made a front end code have 90% (?!?!?!) less code, more readable and I can say for sure 10x faster.
There was a fucking setTimeout() with 5 seconds delay to do something that doesn't even need to wait...
Fuck this shit lol.2 -
If programming languages had honest slogans, what would they be?
-C : Because fuck you.
-C++ : Fuck this.(- Dan Allen )
-Visual Basic : 10 times as big but only 5 times as stupid.
-Lisp : You’re all idiots.
-JavaScript : You guys know I’m holding up the internet, right ?
-Scala : That was a waste of 4 weeks.
-Go : Tell me about it, Scala.
-Python : All we are saying, is give un-typed a chance.
-R : Whoa, I was supposed to be a statistics package!
-Java : Like a Roomba, you guess it’s OK but none of your friends use it.
-PHP : Do Not Resuscitate.
-Perl : PHP, take me with you.
-Swift : Nobody knows.
-HTML : No.
-CSS : I said no.
-XML : Stop.
Source:@Quora: https://quora.com/If-programming-la...6 -
Sometimes.....
When I want to escape how dull/repetitive/boring the world of web development is. I crack open a nice lil terminal, dust off my gcc/g++ compilers and fuck around in C or C++ till my eyes start to bleed.
I have been fucking around with systems development. Mainly with Linux programming. I have also started to get deeper on game engine design and compiler design....because low level development is where its at.
A man can only fuck around rest apis, css and html and the endless sea of Javascript and other dynamic languages for so long before going crazy.
Eventually.....I would want to code something impressive enough to give me a spot somewhere as a C or C++ developer. I just can't work with web development any longer man. It really is not what I want to do, the fact that I do it(and that I am good at it) is circumstantial more than because I really enjoy it. I really don't12 -
I'm freaking the fuck out.
After months of learning from bootcamp and on my own, after a month of no resumes replied to, after almost giving up I finally got a job opportunity in front-end web development.
The thing is, I have to pass their online test to verify my JavaScript-fu.
3 hours.
4 tasks.
And I feel like garbage who can't understand even the most basic algorithms.
By the power of Grayskull, I don't think I have the power...
Wish me luck.16 -
Javascript is a horrible language.
I really try to like it but I can't. Even the wonderous node ecosystem can't redeem Javascript's flaws.
Seriously how the fuck could they invent such a bad language and make it so damn popular. Why couldn't they used an existing language's syntax to make life easier.16 -
I'm so sick of all these fat frontend websites.
Transferring dozens of megabytes of mostly unused libraries is not acceptable.
A browser tab crunching up CPU time because everything must be "beautifully animated" (🤢) and processed without involving page reloads/backend is not acceptable.
A response time of over a second is not acceptable.
Cryptic error messages and random popups asking you to reload your page, not acceptable.
Sticky elements/popups breaking access on small screens is not acceptable.
Running hundreds of ajax calls per minute as heartbeats/probes
and crashing the page when the internet has a hiccup, not acceptable.
Fuck Asana, Fuck Twitch, Fuck LinkedIn, Fuck Youtube, Fuck the dozens of other SPAs which unload their truckload of diarrhea into a tab, yet fail to load crucial functionality about half of the time.
Fuck any page that breaks when you block Facebook, Doubleclick, Twitter or Google Analytics. To hell with websites depending on cookies or javascript loaders to display anything.
I want webpages to be interactive informational documents again.
Fuck off with your apps.
If you want to make an app, learn to use a real language, and get the fuck out of my browser.5 -
Fucking evopdf, I spent 2 days trying to figure out why the fuck my js isn't rendering the html for printing. I created the structure in html already, and it's rendered perfectly with js DOM, when evopdf ran from backend it shows nothing, tried not using external script, tried to put value one by one, it works, my css is also broken, thanks fucker, the client only asked to directly download the html page instead of save as PDF. I thought why the fuck not?
evo pdf modified my CSS element for some odd reason, flex and grid got messed up, page width also fucked along with font size, doesn't support some javascript function. I shit you not the .after and let doesn't work. Fucking garbage
Edit: it worked now, but I spend hours today rewriting everything just to looks decent and it still looks like shit fml6 -
Python: I hate the way it uses True/False over true/false
Java: Static. Just fuck static. oh and System.out.println(), why the fuck did they make the basic print function so long to write.
C#: I despise the way the curly braces get automatically put under the function declaration rather than beside it since it's a language style thing.
C: the inability to declare vars in altho declaration of a forloop. Although I think C11 let's you do this.
Javascript: Fucking prototypes.
Coldfusion: it runs like an elephant. Slow and heavy.
Go: The way the compiler won't let you have unused variables/imports. Pain in the ass for testing.17 -
FUCKING FUCK JAVASCRIPT AND IT'S FUCKING 10000 DEVDEPENDENCIES.
LET ME FUCKING CODE AND WRITE TESTS AND NOT SPEND FUCKING ONE FUCKITY FUCK WEEK TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO FUCKING MAKE MOCHA AND KARMA PLAY WITH FUCKING ES6 CODE YOU FUCKING FUCKTARD PIECE OF SHIT TECH.
I NO LONGER FUCKING KNOW WHICH PACKAGES I FUCKING NEED AND WHICH I FUCKING DON'T FUCKING DUMBFUCK FUCKWIT OPEN AND HACKABLE MY BROWN ASS PIECE OF TECHNOLOGY STACK.
8 -
I'm done with f/e. I so fucking hate it .
I fucking hate implementing weird highly animated websites designed by gurus
I fucking hate making them accessible.
I hate working on weird code generated by my coworkers and jump on projects with 0 specs.
I fucking hate this whole bloatware called javascript.
I fucking hate morons who think they know it all.
I'm fucking disgusted by the job market with their whole job specs ( Oh you don't have 5 year experience in some fucking stupid library I don't give a flying fuck. Too bad, we can't hire you )
And most importantly I fucking hate the day I chose f/e development instead of smth else.
Now at 29 I'm fucking stuck with this shit with no energy and patience to learn something else or at least jump on b/e or anything that is not related to web dev or js.
Sorry for so many fuckings but I had a breakdown.
Love ya.25 -
Am I the only one who is triggered by seeing all of the stupid articles claiming Java is bad introduction language? Just becuase Standford decided to change it to JavaScript? What the actual fuck? How students should learn the fundamentals concept of OOP in scripting language?
Don't get me wrong, I hate using Java for real life projects. But there is a reason why almost every university use it as introduciton language. It's great start to learn programming. Saying that the 'Hello World' in Java is complex and can scare people away, it's complete nonsens. For fuck sake, yes programming should be fun, but it is also hard. People can understand that they are going to learn what 'public static voiď means later. It's the structure of many Computer Science classes. It's the assigments that are not designed in engaging and fun way for newcomers. That's the problem, not the language.21 -
Oh boy.
I recently, I switched job for an open source company in Lyon, FR.
They had struggles to find me something to do (still has, tbh), so they sent me to a client of theirs, to help for a biiiiig project that's really old (created in 2001)
The thing was... Horrible. Lots of styles were set via JavaScript without condition, I found 3 different versions of jQuery, at one time they added Object oriented development in a context where they had HTML, JS, (inline) CSS and... PHP of course, inside of one PHP file. The architecture was more "uuuh these files in this directory will be about this functionality".
And it goes on forever. I told them that I hadn't the required level of PHP knowledge to have an excuse to get the fuck out of there, my company didn't like it but it was either that or my mental health.3 -
Javascript makes me want to flip
the table and say "Fuck this shit", but
I can never be sure what "this" refers
to.5 -
Fuck College, Fuck C, Fuck the people that didnt help me with my C code and in fact made my problems worse and didn't fucking help me, Fuck the bastard that decided to give my the largest mountain of homework, fuck my inability to get shit done, fuck myself for not getting motivated to do anything. And also fuck Javascript cause its JavaScript.
Edit: IM ALSO FUCKING RETARDED41 -
Not a rant about anything in particular. Just a summary of some feelings stored in the hateful part of my heart.
Developing for Android: Add this third-party library to your Gradle build. Use (this) built-in Android class to make the thing work.
*Clicks link
Deprecated since API version SUCKMYDICK-7. Use (this) instead
*Clicks link
Deprecated since API version LICKMYBALLS-32. Use...
Developing for Windows: Please use (this) API call. It was literally already available before Bill Gates was born. Carbon dating has placed this item to older than the universe itself and it is likely the entry point for the big bang. It is also still the best way to accomplish (task).
Developing for Linux: "Hmm, I wonder how to use this"
> > > Some shitty mailing list in small blue monospace font tells you to reference a man page that is three versions behind but the only version available.
What? Those three sentences didn't explain it enough? Well, maybe you aren't cut out for this type of thing.
JavaScript: you know how it is.
SQL: You expect a decent-quality answer from stack overflow but you always get an outdated and hacky response and it's using syntax from Microsoft SQL. You need MySQL.
C#: A surprising number of Microsoft forum results ranking high on Google. You click on one in hopes that it will be of any sort of quality. You quickly close the tab and wonder why you ever even had hope.
Literally any REST API: Is it "query" or "q"? "UserID" or "user_id"? Oh, fuck, where's the docs again?
You thought you escaped JavaScript, but it was a trick!: Some bullshit library you downloaded to make your other library work redefined one of the global variables in the project you inherited. Now you get 347 "<x> is not a function" errors in your console. Good luck, asshole.
FontAwesome/ Material fonts/ Any icon font pack: You search "Close" for a close button icon. No results. You search "Simplified railroad crossing sign without the railroad". You get a close icon.
I think that's all of my pent up rage. Each of them were too small for an individual rant so I had to do this essay.2 -
If I died, I would have one regret.
I once worked in a code base whose messiness would make an oil spill in the fucking pacific ocean look like spilled milk on the floor in comparison.
Naturally, it had bugs. Oh BOY did it have bugs. Most of them were taken care of well enough. Or about as well as anyone insane enough to work in that code could.
There was just this one bug, which I still (un)fondly call "my bug of 2 years". It. Just. Didn't. Make. Sense.
It was written in JavaScript. Naturally. Which by itself, is the metaphorical programming language equivalent of a pile of horse manure. But this bug. It was the guano icing on top of the horse manure cake which is JavaScript.
I LITERALLY spent 2 years trying to find a solution. I woke up at night, thinking of explanations. I had dreams about fixing the damn thing. And I never did.
On the day I left the job, I had to pass it on to a friend (who hasn't solved the fucker yet either).
I hated that bug with all my heart. But..
Now that I think back, all the books I read, all the docs that I scoured, every non working fix I coded and every failed efforts I made on it, eventually made me a better programmer.
So cherish your bugs and issues. Sometimes, they come, not to hurt you, but to help you grow (unless you use JS, those bugs just wanna fuck you).3 -
I disabled javascript in my browser. Amount of shit loading to read shitty article is insane.
I opened chrome devtools and it was 300 requests and 10MB to read 500 words.
Another news portal 250 requests 7MB to see 300 words.
WTF ?
And they’re fighting with internet traffic by lowering movie quality ?
I just add I have pihole with lots of wildcard filters filtering half of internet and fucking adblocker and those numbers are after those filters.
Are you fucking out of your mind ?
Fucking hypocrites.17 -
Trying to debug some webpage JavaScript with Edge.
Console window doesn't log anything before you open it.
You cannot copy-paste more than a single line from it.
You cannot search in it.
Fuck. Just FUCK.8 -
The company I work for (very big IT consultancy) has made the absolutely genius decision to put a block on the corporate proxy for GitHub. GITHUB. Because no fucking software developer ever needs to visit there. Their reason? "We don't want people publishing our intellectual property". Mate, I can fucking guarantee you that if unscrupulous bastards want to publish code against our T&C's, they will do so. Why make every body else's job harder and block it?!
But the best bit, you can submit a request (that is accepted without question) to get yourself an exemption. WHY THE FUCKING FUCK HAVE THE BLOCK IN THE FIRST PLACE THEN
To add to their fucktardery, they blocked the CDN that hosted stackoverflows css and JavaScript last year (CloudFlare) weeks after the alleged hack was fixed, and seemingly without any research at all. This obviously rendered stackoverflow unusable. Because again, why would a company full of engineers need to go there.
Morons.4 -
Story Time:
When I first started working where I currently am, the manager at the time decided to send us off to a conference about one of the products our institution was purchasing at the time. She also thought that it would be a good way for me, the new guy, to bond with the rest of the staff.
During the presentations we found out that the people surrounding us were not exactly developers because of a couple of things:
1. Some examples were done with php and javascript for adding functionality to said product. The product gave you the opportunity to script on top of it (think of some sort of CMS, but it does not use PHP as its backend language) EVERYONE from the "class" in this particular workshop said they were developers. But at the sight of php in a group of 80 people or so, only about 7 recognized it, including myself and my team.
2. When they showed an example with Javascript, in particular jquery, one of the dudes in the workshop said (with extreme senior level confidence might I add) "yeah I never liked Javascript because you really can't connect it to any database in a website" <--- my face went 0.o and one of the actual developers doing the presentation did a Jim from the Office and looked at some out of screen camera.
3. During a conf talk, one PHD dude showed an example in the template language the CMS used (an obscure Java based template language)in which he was proudly calling out a technique he used to include one snippet of code into another one.....at that time, one of my coworkers squinted his eyes in disbelief, got close to me and said "is this man telling everyone in here that he discovered how to include a file? like, as a new thing?" me: "lol yes", him: "this is a waste of time, do the docs for this thing show how to do it or is he doing some sort of strange maneuver for something the platform does not support?" me: "let me check....nope, it is included, for some reason he made a function that takes the...name of the file he wants to include and passes it over to that call inside of the body....which as per the docs it is the include function...." him: ".....fuck, what a waste of time and money, fuck it lets spend a couple of more minutes here and then go get a drink or something"
That last part was my favorite really, the man speaking was not just any phd holder, but a comp sci phd holder. To this day my dude would walk into my office and say shit like "I DISCOVERED HOW TO INCLUDE A FILE WITH PHP!"14 -
so heres to all the fucking programming teachers who use incorrectly terminology when explaining shit. now i gotta go tell my friend that he should ignore what the teacher said and ill tell her how to myself. also fuck javascript and code.org's terrible implementation of an environment for it.
4 -
The most helpful error message of all time:
Unhandled exception in line 0: Script error.
Literally translates to: “Something went wrong but I’m not gonna tell you what.” -
Fuck web dev.
I dabbled in many areas but I do web dev most often. And seriously: fuck web dev. Your site has to work on multiple browsers. Multiple screen resolutions. The code has to be tiny for load time. The images have to work for every resolution and still be small. The styling can look different in different browsers. So many useful javascript features are only supported by modern browsers. An on top of that: IE.
I’ve gotten quite good at all of this, but still: it’s such a fucking pain.10 -
well this is a NO!
just jumped on a WordPress website and was wondering why it was taking so bloody long to load even on high-speed internet. only to view source and get hit with 240 lines of JavaScript includes and about 20 odd lines of content.
LIKE WTFFF!!!
There is no way on this fucking earth every single library is being used to show me a god fucking dam search result that returns absolutely nothing no matter what i search for.
To any wordpress "DEVS" out there FUCK YOU and your FUCKING plugin madness.
I would love to hear from a WP dev how you justify this kind of bullshit!
10 -
A LOT of this article makes me fairly upset. (Second screenshot in comments). Sure, Java is difficult, especially as an introductory language, but fuck me, replace it with ANYTHING OTHER THAN JAVASCRIPT PLEASE. JavaScript is not a good language to learn from - it is cheaty and makes script kiddies, not programmers. Fuck, they went from a strong-typed, verbose language to a shit show where you can turn an integer into a function without so much as a peep from the interpreter.
And fUCK ME WHY NOT PYTHON?? It's a weak typed but dynamic language that FORCES good indentation and actually has ACCESS TO THE FILE SYSTEM instead of just the web APIs that don't let you do SHIT compared to what you SHOULD learn.
OH AND TO PUT THE ICING ON THE CAKE, the article was comparing hello worlds, and they did the whole Java thing right but used ALERT instead of CONSOLE.LOG for JavaScript??? Sure, you can communicate with the user that way too but if you're comparing the languages, write text to the console in both languages, don't write text to the console in Java and use the alert api in JavaScript.
Fuck you Stanford, I expected better you shitty cockmunchers.
31 -
JavaScript Motherfucking Asynchronous Bullshit.
I get it, for quite some stuff, async is very, very useful. But why on fucking earth do so goddamn many functions NEED this (and those callback functions) and can't do without?!
If there would be good and nicely understandable await documentation that actually fucking works, I'd be so happy.
I've currently got .then after .then after motherfucking then and its irritating me to no end as it, in this context, shouldn't even be necessary. This thing I'm writing doesn't give a fuck if something takes a few milliseconds before the rest of the program can continue!!
Fuck asynchronous programming in JavaScript for goddamn everything.
(I do love JavaScript!)27 -
Javascript! What a fucking horrible language it is.
I just wonder why this fucking language became this popular nowadays just performance is not a good reason to use this fucking language everywhere.
13 -
> be me a 23 y.o intern
> two years on self learned MEAN stack
> first day of intern<
> boss: we need you to become an iOS intern
> me: *whut*
> me: *thinking swift syntax is similar to JavaScript*
> me: OK, in swift ?
> boss: No, in Obj-C
> me: *fuck*
> spend 2 days to familiarize with Obj-C
> boss: Here's a bug, solve it.
> me: OK
> me: *checking their code for the first time*
> me: *fuck, fucking huge*
> me: *open up bug related ViewConttoller*
> me: *fuck, 6k lines of code*
> me: *fucking MVC*
> spend 2 hours to fix the bug <
> boss: you did great ! awesome
> me: *heh*
> boss: *announce to everyone* from now on INTERN will take over the project.
> me: *whut*
> boss: here's our roadmap plz implement features
> after 3 months <
> me fixing bug <
> me do feature development <
> me write shitty code <
.
.
.
repeat, life as an intern6 -
I’m fucking done….
I don’t even know what to tell.
I’m a CTO in a startu. We have pretty good traction, my salary is about average senior dev salary (plus 10%).
I’m good financially.
But I have no more pleasure in work. Like at all.
“This API call performance is bad”
Yeah I know, maybe you shpuldn’t try to call it for 1000 objects at the time ?
“We need to reduce Azure cost”
Yeah I know, but are you ready to live with performances downgrade it will generate ?
“I don’t understand on what thing you worked past week, where is a devops card ?
Fuck you, I’m in extenuating fire mode, I don’t have time for a fucking devops card
“We should migrate whole stack to modern technology, like JavaScript”
Thank you for your imput, Blazor WAS created to avoid JabaScript
“The client has only 1.000.000 records and API doesn’t return them all”
Use fucking paging moron. And BTW, I’m adding “number of authorized requests” shortly.
I can go on and on and on for hours. But the idea is : I completely lost the will or motivation to do anything. I’m considering just to quit and go back to be Junior dev for a random company.9 -
Time to rant about JavaScript tutorials.
If you don't know the 'jQuery basic arithmetic' joke, Google it now. It'll make you laugh, promised.
In that manner i just remembered a JavaScript tutorial my fiancee tried to follow when she did an internship at the company i work for last year.
She was tasked to create a temperature interface for our server rack, which she wanted to do via an Arduino and a webserver aswell as an SQL database.
The Arduino part wasn't really a problem, but since she had no experience with js she very closely clinged to a chart visualisation tutorial.
All of that worked very well, but beeing the person i am i looked at the code and found something off.
The chart library had no dependencies to external libraries or any local files for any of them. Though the tutorial used a jQuery import.
So why did it use jQuery?
Well...
To load the chart initialization after the page has loaded.
So they pulled the entirety of jQuery in just to do what fucking window.addEventListener('DOMContentLoaded',function(){...}); could have done.
I wonder how many people who just want something to work did this shit. I hate it that so many tutorials do not adhere any kinds of standards, override behavior because they don't like it, even though it may have a very good reason to exist, pull entire libraries in for something vanilla <language> can do in 3 lines, etc.
Fuck.7 -
Fuck whoever invented octal literals with just a zero prefix. 042 should never not equal 42. How hard is it to have 0x42 for hex, 0b11 for binary and 0c42 for octal21
-
Today I learned in a cafe why (some) users think that Facebook doesn't allow them data control. Due to drunkness I'm paraphrasing here, but it went something like this:
- I don't trust Facebook, because my posts that I make are visible to people that I didn't want to have it be seen to.
> Audience controls. Use them.
- This guy in town sent me a friend request, why would he be able to??1!1
> He and you share hometown. So probably friend suggestions based on you both explicitly sharing location, or he just visited your profile on name and wanted to get in touch with you. Socializing on the internet, it exists.
That's the kind of user that's roaming the facebooks on the internets and the googles I guess? The type of user that's surprised that their Facebook games and nametests expose information that they explicitly consent to? Give me a break. I care deeply about privacy, but this is just ridiculous.
On a different note, why the fuck is not a single one of those very same fucking Facebook users worried about 25-ish% of websites running their JavaScript (which you can check and block using NoScript and co.), which is the *actual* privacy threat? But muh nametests!!!
Fuck ignorant users!!!10 -
Drinking is all fun and games until you need to come in to work next morning." The fuck is a JavaScript" is what my brain is at the moment.7
-
Just read an article that really grinds my gears. Its about coding in other languages. Not programming languages, but literally other languages.
Btw I learned to code in Spanish and I'm not against coding in programming languages using variable names in other languages.
That's fine.
What pissed me off was that the author claimed that we should be able to code Fucking JavaScript in SWAHILI or other languages available. What kind of PC bullshit is that!
Coding is barely fucking readable and now we have to make standards for Multilanguage support. Just learn the less than 60 reserved words you lazy fuck and code with them! I leaned to code with shitty tutorials in Spanish and theres no 1000x resources out there and this author claims you can't code unless you know english.
Granted. It's easier but wtf not just learn it. When I coded in Java in Spanish, I didn't know wtf a Class was or ags meant. So what. I memorized that shit. How? By coding!
Why bring this PC shit to programming? The author thinks there are few programmers bc we don't support fucking SWAHILI in JavaScript. Fuck no!
Now if you want to support this initiative. Think of this,
...legacy code
...in 32+ languages.
Have fun debugging this thing.14 -
Mother fucking SQL, fuck mathematicians, fuck every thing!
So let's supose we'd only need the first char of a string. Every, and I mean fucking every (php, java, javascript, ruby, python, haskell) fucking language, uses something like `substring(input, 0, 1)` as it knows the input is nothing more than a fucking array of chars, otherwise known as motherfucking String. Logically the offset for the first char is 0.
Enter SQL, there you need to put `SUBSTRING(input, 1, 1)` because fuck every one! Fucking math guys who developed relational algebra on which (most) databases are based on (I love you for it, but come on you fuckers!), Decided that the first character should be at position 1...
Fuckers6 -
Why the fuck does people who teach in professional colleges doesn't have the mindset to update their godamnn fucking dinosaur knowledge to the least basics of modern technology.
Had to do this mini-project for uni, and the languages allowed included java, python, php or any similar frontend tools for creating desktop app or web app. I planned on taking React + Express cz apparently that'll fall in the category.
Now she starts yelling at my project saying its not allowed and when I fucking asked her "can I use node.js which is basically javascript" she said yes.
And for gods sake she has a Masters degree and phd but doesn't even know what's the difference between get and post request!! Fed up with this college shit!!7 -
Yknow, I want to make an android app that I have in my mind for about half a year now and I already tried twice, both with Kotlin and with Java but everytime I try it's just pain and suffering and frustration...
No it's not because of the language, I like Java and I like Kotlin too and I'd say I'm at least decent at Kotlin and really good in Java...
No no.. the issue is the fucking Android SDK and the mix-and-match documentation available online!!!
Every fucking time I want to implement some sort of UI element, user action or a background service and I start googling how to do it It comes with with at least 3 different stack overflow solutions, all of them saying "that way of doing it is deprecated, instead you should X" and looking up the OFFICIAL FUCKING DOCS it will just make me roll up in the corner and cry because of how fucking inconsistent it is and the retarded domain language it uses... fucking transactions for fucking fragments inside fucking activities... because I guess the word "screen"/"view"/"template" or something similar natural just was too mainstream for the all knowing alphabet soup that google is...
And then you start looking up what the fucking difference even is and how to code it up only to find out there's at least 12 other opinions on how fragments should be used and what should be an activity and what should be a damn fragment...
But that's not all, that's just the base... I get a headache even thinking about how the fucking inflating of templates and the entire R. notation works. You want to open a fucking tiny corner menu with the settings options? WELL THEN YOU FUCKING BETTER REMEMBER TO IMPLEMENT IT THROUGH SOME SORT OF EVENT AND INFLATE THE MENU YOURSELF EVEN THOUGH ITS THE SAME FUCKING THING WITH STATIC STRINGS...
AND WHY THE FUCK DO I NEED LIKE 4 NEW FILES TO IMPLEMENT A FUCKING LISTVIEW...
also talking about ListViews... what was wrong with "ListView"... Why do we need a "RecyclerView"... oh right... because the fucks fucked the fuck up and all the legacy components were designed by a monkey and are next to useless! SO WE NEEDED A NEW NAME FOR THE FIXED VERSION, CANT NAME IT LISTVIEW AGAIN... FUCK YOU...
honestly... if I got a dolar for every "what the fuck android" I said during trying to understand that mess I'd be richer by a few hundred...
oh oh oh, but you know what? You don't like the android SDK? that's fine, you can use fucking React or Flutter or something... yeah.. because instead of torturing myself with the android SDK I want to torture myself with an abstraction of the same SDK and JavaScript as the fucking cherry on top... HAVE YOU FUCKING SEEN THE CODE FLUTTER SHOWS ON THEIR WEBSITE AS THE "Introduction" ?!!!
Look at this piece of shit:
[code in attached image, we could really use a proper Markdown support at least for rants]
THAT'S NOT EVEN THE ENTIRE THING, THAT'S JUST THE *REALLY* UGLY PART...
The fucking nesting... What is it with JS and all the fucking nesting everytime?! It looks like shit.... It reads like shit as well...
WHY, in the name OF FUCK, IS THERE MORE THAN 5 ANDROID FRAMEWORKS and ALL of them... used this FUCKING NOVEL idea of programming using A FUCKING BRACKET WALL
It always looks like:
(code(code[code{code(code{code()})}]));
If I wanted to make a fucking app or a website using fucking Haskell I'd do that.... at this point reading assembly code feels like heaven compared to this retardation... Why is this so popular?! WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE SEE IN IT?! Clearly it's not the aesthetics... it looks like a fucking frog vomit running down an emus leg, fuck that.... I don't even hate classic JavaScript, it's a good enough language and it does what I tell it to... but these ugly fucking frameworks like react, angular and whatever else uses this fucking format can go fuck right off. This is not the way JS is gonna get a better name for itself...
So:
Fuck Google
Fuck the marionette that designed the Android SDK
Fuck the Hellspawn the came up with the "functional-like" way of using JavaScript
Fuck everyone that thinks "JavaScript everywhere" is a good thing
And deeply future-fuck everyone that makes a new framework following any of these standards, stucks a .js at the end of the name and releases his hairball.js of an invention into the fucking world....
It's a mess... fuck everything android related...
14 -
Teaching JavaScript to a master of classical programming (only uses C++, Python, Ruby, etc.). Here are the results:
1. What
2. What the fuck
3. Why
4. Why the fuck
5. Oh shit that's useful
6. Oh shit that's stupid
7. Why would anyone do that
8. Why isn't anyone else doing that
9. This is crazy complex
10. This is stupid easy8 -
A recruiter emailed me.
And called me (and left a voicemail).
AND texted me.
About a job opportunity in California (I live in Texas).
That requires experience writing performance critical and thread-safe code in a large multi-threaded codebase (I work primarily in JavaScript/TypeScript ecosystem, fat chance of that).
Responsibilities listed as: Focus on Supercharger Open Charge Point Protocol (OCPP) software features. I don’t even know what the fuck that means.
Opportunity is for a 3 month contract.
Why are you so desperate, lady?10 -
Jesus Fuck, is it so hard to slap a motherfucking 'Delete Account' button somewhere on that trashpile of 5000 different Javascript-frameworks and bootstrap you call website?!
No I don't want to deactivate it, I want you to DELETE all the information you have on me, preferably without having to fucking beg some low-life suppport agent in India (no offense intended) via E-Mail to do his goddamn duty...6 -
Fuck this, fuck that, fuck the buffer, fuck AES, fuck crypto, fuck node-forge, fuck IV and browsers, once I am done with this fucking cryptographic wrapper on both client and server, the first person to say decrypt and Javascript in the same sentence in front of me will get their own dick in their ass. The guy that said mixing computer and crypto was a bad idea was fucking right4
-
I sometimes forget to close the tab to my bank's website. I flip back to it, hours, or even days later. As soon as the tab becomes active the "You'll be logged out in 60 second" timer starts ticking. Literally, days after I logged in, I can click "Stay logged in" and it works!
Their session timeout logic is all fucking Javascript based!? Don't they log out the session server-side at some point? How the fuck is my session still valid 2 days after initial login?5 -
Fuck you javascript and your bizarre Date object.
May your ass itch, and arms become too short to reach.
Spend a good hour debugging why this fucker:
(new Date).getDay();
Returns 3, when it's actually the 2nd of May.
Turns out the value returned by getDay is an integer corresponding to the day of the week.
(new Date).getDate(); it is, ಠ_ಠ15 -
*looks for some reviews of a dentist*
Yelp: ah yes we have that.
*Enters Yelp site*
"Oh noes, you have JavaScript disabled! You should enable it because it can make websites really cool (why does this seem like a front-end wank), gives you compliments when you had a bad day (fuck you Yelp), can save the world from tragedy on its own (does savetheworld.js exist yet?). But that you'll never realize anymore. Because YOU disabled JavaScript, filthy piece of shit you are. So enable JavaScript so that we can have so much more fun!"
Ah, not providing any content that I visited your shitty site for, guilt-tripping me into enabling JavaScript for your dribble, and on top of that saying that we'll have fun when I whitelist you. Fun ey.. you know what'd be fun Yelp? For me to go there and shove my dick into every one of your front-end and marketing cunts' faces until they turn blue. Now THAT would be a lot of fun!!!2 -
- Fuck mobile apps that open links in embedded browser windows
- Fuck Wordpress page builders that use the single content field as an embedded IDrag&DropE.
- Fuck unindented HTML markup
- Fuck plugins with "pro" versions that provide more than 50% of the advertised features.
- Fuck building an app with a SPA framework and then adding SSR cuz ur SEO is fucked.
- Fuck Javascript transitions that are meant to make a site look fancy but slow it the fuck down.
Fuck it.
Vent your frustrations9 -
You wanna know what the fuck we did in our goddamn code.org class today, wait no, the last whole fucking week. YES OR NO QUESTIONS. I GET BINARY IS FUCKING 0'S AND 1'S. FOR GOD SAKES I KNOW BINARY. I EVEN KNOW FUCKING TERNARY. AND. YOU KNOW WHAT TEACHER ? EVERYONE ELSE COULD LEARN BINARY IN FIVE GODDAMN MINUTES. "Is code.org worthy of being kicked in the ass and tied up on a railroad when the trains coming?" Is a perfect binary question. This whole fucking class I feel like I'm in an english class for five year olds in spain. HEY TEACHER I DON'T CARE IF BILL GATES OR MARK SUCKERBURG OR BARAK OBAMA OR GODDAMN CHRIS BOSH SUPPORTS IT. ITS FOR THERE FUCKING REPUTATION. PEOPLE WITH HALF A BRAIN KNOW THESE PEOPLE DON'T GIVE A FUCK. THEY EACH HAVE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OR EVEN BILLIONS OF DOLLARS, BUT THEY ALL CHOSE TO USE A FIVE DOLLAR MIC JUST TO FUCK WITH US. EVERY TIME I WALK IN THAT CLASS I FEEL DEGRADED LIKE I'VE BEEN PUT BACK IN PRESCHOOL. THANK YOU TEACHER, I ALWAYS WANTED TO LEARN BINARY TO MAKE MY FUCKING SIMPLE JAVASCRIPT APP AS MY FINAL PROJECT FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR.4
-
Dear ESLint,
- you convinced me to put a space between function() and {
- you convinced me to use single quotes for strings in place of double quotes
- you convinced me to put a space between inline operators
- you had me when you said that trailing spaces shouldn't compare in my code
- you said to put semicolons at the end of each instruction, and I thought it wasn't a so bad idea
BUT NO FUCK OFF NO NEVER I WON'T NEVER PUT A FUCKING TRAILING COMMA IN THE END OF JAVASCRIPT OBJECT IT'S MEANINGLESS UGLY A WASTE OF A FUCKING BYTE.
WHY THE FUCK I SHOULD TYPE var obj = {a: 'some text',} INSTEAD OF var obj = {a: 'some text'} WHY WHAT'S THE MEANING OF THAT FUCKING COMMA9 -
Just spent 2 fucking hours debugging one of my websites scripts because apparently appendChild wasn't a function... Here I was thinking there was a function called getElementByClassName... Dick head me didn't realise I'm missing a single 's'... 2 hours over a single fucking s!
Fuck javascript man...12 -
The company I work for offered a Javascript Course/Training for every developer to enroll, which happens to take place on 3 days. In the description it was ensured to be for everyone, doesn't matter if you are an expert or beginner: there's something to learn for everyone.
The company described him as a top coacher in Austria and that he is overbooked for 2 years. High in demand indeed. "Has to be good", I thought. As a relatively average JS developer, there has to be something to learn for me.
Sitting here the second day, I fucking regret to join this shit. I have never seen such a bullshit in my lifetime. Why the fuck would you even book this man, he doesn't even understand basic concepts of software engineering. Just reading down the script, opening the script on one laptop and showcaseing it on the other. When someone asks a question, there's a 70% chance he doesn't know the answer. It takes this scumbag 30 fucking seconds to define a function; probably making spelling mistakes alongside.
I don't even want to know how much this dude will make from this "coaching". Hoped that it'd get better over time but I don't see an improvement. Contacting my boss that I'll leave this "training".7 -
Just saw an ad on LinkedIn.
First line: looking for JavaScript developers of all levels
A bit further down...
Requirements: 4+ years of JavaScript experience plus whole front-end stuff
The fuck is wrong with people?
At least the salary is not crap. -
I've been debugging a bug for two days straight and I have only thing to say:
fuck javascript a piece of shit15 -
Fuck the new ECMAScript 2018 specifications.
https://youtu.be/s-G_RZ4RJLU
I mean seriously? How the hell is dot syntax gonna make it more readable?
Also, i love the brackets, braces and semicolon. Hate to see them deprecated.
Almost gave me a heart attack and my head was boiling watching it.
😓😌6 -
Buckle up, it's a long one.
Let me tell you why "Tree Shaking" is stupidity incarnate and why Rich Harris needs to stop talking about things he doesn't understand.
For reference, this is a direct response to the 2015 article here: https://medium.com/@Rich_Harris/...
"Tree shaking", as Rich puts it, is NOT dead code removal apparently, but instead only picking the parts that are actually used.
However, Rich has never heard of a C compiler, apparently. In C (or any systems language with basic optimizations), public (visible) members exposed to library consumers must have that code available to them, obviously. However, all of the other cruft that you don't actually use is removed - hence, dead code removal.
How does the compiler do that? Well, it does what Rich calls "tree shaking" by evaluating all of the pieces of code that are used by any codepaths used by any of the exported symbols, not just the "main module" (which doesn't exist in systems libraries).
It's the SAME FUCKING THING, he's just not researched enough to fully fucking understand that. But sure, tell me how the javascript community apparently invented something ELSE that you REALLY just repackaged and made more bloated/downright wrong (React Hooks, webpack, WebAssembly, etc.)
Speaking of Javascript, "tree shaking" is impossible to do with any degree of confidence, unlike statically typed/well defined languages. This is because you can create artificial references to values at runtime using string functions - which means, with the right input, almost anything can be run depending on the input.
How do you figure out what can and can't be? You can't! Since there is a runtime-based codepath and decision tree, you run into properties of Turing's halting problem, which cannot be solved completely.
With stricter languages such as C (which is where "dead code removal" is used quite aggressively), you can make very strong assertions at compile time about the usage of code. This is simply how C is still thousands of times faster than Javascript.
So no, Rich Harris, dead code removal is not "silly". Your entire premise about "live code inclusion" is technical jargon and buzzwordy drivel. Empty words at best.
This sort of shit is annoying and only feeds into this cycle of the web community not being Special enough and having to reinvent every single fucking facet of operating systems in your shitty bloated spyware-like browser and brand it with flashy Matrix-esque imagery and prose.
Fuck all of it.20 -
I'm a front end developer who knows Ruby on rails and Node Js, I still call myself a freaking FRONT END DEVELOPER because I don't have enough knowledge of the required concepts to trust my skill in a complex backend project.
How the fuck there are so many full stack developers who lack shit tons of knowledge in both specialties! And worst of those are asp.net "FULLSTACK DEVS" that can't write JavaScript without copying and pasting from SO and don't know that display flex is a thing!14 -
"I won't use javascript for this webapp where we don't use anything server-side, because I've been using php for everything"
Yeah fuck you12 -
After 3 interviews with test:
"Ok very good, I see you are good with JavaScript, Php, MySQL and some frameworks, it's exactly what we need because we use only on the edge technologies and we do very cool products."
"Thanks, so what about the first app?"
"App? oh no eheh, now you must manage our 12 wordpress sites and edit the CSS!"
"Very good, so while I see you all goin to fuck monkeys I with to you a nice day"2 -
Just got my first internship using Angular 1 today. Oh yeah, I’ve never in my life touched Angular. Fuck (:
4 -
*Me starving all the week to lose weight:
Lost 3.5~4 Kg
*Me eating as always during my pause day
Won: 2 Kg
Fuck, this shit does not work, it is like Javascript.6 -
TL;DR
Front-end dev trying to dictate back-end tech.
We are gonna start split stack (front / back ) development with the following projects and this stupid fucker who knows jackshit about backend , servers, etc... , is more versed in front end stuff and said herself that she knows nothing about databases told me this:
"No way we are gonna use Java."
I politely said:
"We are gonna analyze the projects requirements and see what technologies best fit the scenario"
Me inside my head:
"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU STUPID CUNT, GET YOUR FUCKING JAVASCRIPT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!! IF WE DECIDE TO JAVA THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYTHING THATS HOW ITS GONNA BE!"4 -
For fuck sake I get that people like python but not everyone is going to use it!
Just want a few articles or tutorials on interpreters and would you fucking look at that, it's all just in fucking python using external libraries...
Then I purchased a couple Linux and Raspberry pi magazines just to have a gander at some of the code examples and what do you think every single piece of code is? C? C++? Vala? Nope, fucking python!
I will eventually finish learning what I can about python but there are other languages that exist that isnt fucking python, give us some C, C# or even bloody JavaScript... Please
Ok rant about python over, back to my hole12 -
!devButAlsoKindaIsDev
Alright, time to do some explanation.
TL;DR: JavaScript is a fucking nightmare. May god help every web developer out there. Essentially, I was gone because of JavaScript.
Q: where tf are you bruh
A: in your mo-uhhhhh alright, so I was chosen to be the main developer for an interactive promotional video for my school (every year the school holds something called an open day, where kids from 8th grade can come to the school and have a tour in the school first hand. Because of the coronavirus (just gonna call it “the rona” from here) this is now impossible so we are losing the interest and the first impressions so the school decided to make an interactive virtual one). They asked me if I want to do it and I said yes.
Boy, was that ever a mistake... (hint: it was a huge mistake)
So the guy who talked to me and asked if I wanted to do this was my grade’s manager, and he gave me the phone number of my PM. So we talked and stuff, and then this happened: (bruh = PM)
bruh: I’ll send you the API and documentation for the thing that we are working with! They have lots of examples and stuff and they’re Israeli too!
Me: Okay! What language are we talking about here?
bruh: JavaScript.
Me: (questioning life choices) Okay!
I didn’t write any JavaScript for the last 3 years or so. It had to be done because I promised and I can’t let down people who count at me and ask me to show where I shine.
So, what was the objective for me? Build a Firebase client that sends the user’s score and choices to Firestore after he chooses something in the interactive video (for example, go to chemistry or go to physics) while learning JavaScmeme (ECMEMEScript) as I go.
Deadline? A week and a half.
After working almost 12 hours a fucking day, I made it work. Sorta. In order to reconcile with small exceptions and edge cases in the interactive video, I had to hard-code some IDs in the code. I had no choice, since I couldn’t allow myself to spend more and more time to make my code more dynamic than it was because I simply didn’t have time. The code absolutely STINKS but it works.
Today is the day where we (aim) to finish all of the cosmetic things that we need to fix. All of them are non-essential for everything to work, but we want to make this thing presentable because we want to put this on the school’s website.
CONCLUSION:
JavaScript is literal shit. Dynamic weakly-typed languages are cursed AF and need to die in a fire.7 -
Fuck JavaScript, seriously I have spent the last 8 hours trying to build a fucking basic search application that would take me < 1 hour in any other fucking programming language on the planet. I AM FUCKING DONE WITH THIS SHIT. I'd rather pay some dude with a long ass fucking beard who calls himself a "Frontend Engineer" WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS. Because my backend oriented brain cannot fucking handle all of the frameworks, and modules, and different versions of the same fucking language. Plus its like JavaScript was designed so that you can't not write spaghetti code. FUCK THIS. I'm going back to writing static fucking template code that is used by a fucking backend language that only changes every few fucking years, not every month.
Have a great day. :)4 -
Ok, Why tha Fuck does everyone bitch about javascript, like seriously why?
Its a damn great language and i have fun working with it. sure some people prefer other languages but it seems people who haven't even tried JS properly talk shit about it.20 -
did you know, that in PHP, you can do:
if ( ! function_exists('function_name'))
{
function function_name()
{
//code of the function
}
}
which apparently means you can do
if($var == 'something'){
function functionName(){
//some code
}
} else if($var == 'something else'){
function functionName(){
//some completely different code
}
}
so now, apparently:
1. before this code executes, the function doesn't exist at all (okay, i can live with that)
2. after this code executes, any call to that function can result in any of those two completely different bodies of the same-name function executing, depending on what the $var was set at that time?
...so... now not only the same call to the same(name) function can do two completely different things, *but if you change the value of $var afterwards, you can't even properly find out which version of that function is in effect for the remainder of the run of the script*...?????
WHAT.
THE.
...i mean... I can't help but think that the idea of conditional function declaration like this is... kind of cool (have I been warped by JavaScript too much?), but at the same time... WHAT THE FUCK.18 -
people always complain about semicolons but I don't think I've ever had a semicolon issue cuz of ide's. but I'm plagued by tons of other stupid mistakes, like forgetting to initialize my ArrayList<>'s in java from null to empty..1
-
If I were the world dictator I would forbid JavaScript in web pages for a month, to teach shitty web developers a lesson.
Is it normal that to submit a form I have to use the developer console!? For fuck sake, I don't give a shit about your fancy scripts that only god knows what they're supposed to do. A simple <form> with an <input type="submit"> would do the job, holy fuck!
I'm so tired of those fucking broken scripts. Don't write JavaScript if you suck at it!3 -
I'm an embedded devices dev. As part of my job I take off the shelf devices and write libraries so that our JavaScript team can interface with them. If I have to deal with one more custom implementation of a standard protocol I'm going to freak the fuck out. Like fuck there are only 5 or so major communication protocols at the hardware level there is no fucking reason to reinvent some shittier protocol over a well documented, widely used protocol that has been around for 30 years. (Modbus for anyone who cares)2
-
So recently I needed to make a little Tic-tac-toe game with Node.JS for an university project. I previously learned Java and C# so Javascript as a non-compiled, script based language was something new for me.
Now during the programming process I reached the point where I needed to implement a function to change the player who's playing.
I was testing the game and... It seemed like the player was changed twice so it immediately switched back to the previous player.
Using a lot of console.log's I finally stumbled upon the error... (since Javascript or at least Visual Studio Code, I honestly don't know, doesn't have any kind of debugger or something).
Why the fuck does js allow to make allocations in if conditions?
I accidentally wrote one '=' instead of three '==='.
No error, no warning... Nothing.
Since then js and me are not friends anymore.8 -
Javascript promises: I JUST WANT THE FUCKING VALUE OF A PROMISE.
WHO THE FUCK THOUGHT PROMISES SIMPLIFIED ANYTHING?!11 -
All the articles about javascript fatigue lately. Omg just shut the fuck up already. Being a developer is hard, deal with it2
-
HEY!
JAVASCRIPT!
I wasted 3 hours on your this. self. null, undefined, + asynch functions, bullshit "features"...
AGAIN...
and your taking 8 seconds to compile and test each wild guess that I make until I finally console.log every single fucking variable in order to make sense of it all
so, as usual, FUCK YOU17 -
Why the fuck should I echo javascript?
Why in fucks name you do not deal with JSON responses?
Plugin devs are either lazy, or simply stupid as fuck!
Ps: Or I'm actually crazy6 -
Things that seem "simple" but end up taking a long ass time to actually deploy into production:
1. Using a new payment processor:
"It's just a simple API, I'll be done in 2 hours"
LOL sure it is, but testing orders and setting up a sandbox or making sure you have credentials right, and then switching from test to life and retesting, and then... fuck
2. Making changes to admin stats.
"'I just have to add this column and remove that one... maybe like a couple of hours"
YOU WISH
3. Anything Javascript
"Hah, what, that's like a button, np"
125 minutes later...
console.log('before foo');
console.log(this.foo)
etc..2 -
It's computer science college, and yet :
Them : ... so thats how my project goes ! it's fun!
Me : whoa that's cool, do you use javascript?
Them : ... umm
Me : ...I suppose??
Them : uh, i use node and bulma actually.
WHAT THE FUCK?11 -
Fuck you JavaScript with your blocks within blocks within blocks, your promises and callbacks, your million of libraries that are doublons or not finished. Fuck you with your assigning variable before functions, fuck you!11
-
Fuck the JavaScript ecosystem; Fuck React, Redux, and a big special fuck you to React-Router. And fuck interviews that give week long assignments.
The whole fucking JavaScript community makes the simplest things so complicated just so that they can tell Backend and Mobile Devs “Hey our job is difficult too”; fuck you, it isn’t! You made it difficult. and so that they can write corny emoji-laden medium articles about it to supplement their meagre income. What’s more the articles are outdated in less than a week.
Fuck JavaScript; APIs changes everyday a week and it’s documentation is updated every decade.4 -
I decided I should finally relocate from Russia. As one of the people I value much once said, it’s not about grass being greener, it’s about grass being alive.
I’m not going to buy a property here. Instead, I do this all at the same time:
- fixing my health (eye surgery done, quit smoking half a year ago, quit sugar several months ago, now through dental care and an obesity treatment with newest novo-nordisk stuff and sports, so far so good)
- gaining some momentum (newsletter launched, articles and open source stuff are published on a regular basis, it all gonna assembly to make my new website and a v2.0 media presence)
- learning (hands-on management and a11y experience on my current job as a tech evangelist, also a11y courses, bleeding edge JavaScript and css)
- saving money. Fuck rouble, just converting everything into usd covers up all commissions and taxes and basically makes me money
I’m going to accomplish all this and finally relocate.
Being attached to my city is a bias and a mind game. I just need to leave.
18 -
Final project senior year...
Mistake 1: Chose a project suggested by the prof, who did not initially make it obvious that the project beneficiary would be a personal friend of his.
Mistake 2: Nine of us thought this project looked cool and all signed up for it.
Mistake 3: Looked at the code-behind provided for us and discovered that the web-app we were building was... programmed in Java, using StringBuilder to append HTML, CSS, and JavaScript and create its webpages. Which was then decoded and built into a webpage using some obtusely designed compiler.
Mistake 4: Decided to question the reasonability of said project to the prof.
Mistake 5: Did not quit the project as a group and do something else
We all graduated, I think, but a lot of C-'s were had. Fuck that class. -
!rant, but kinda
My new director wants to buy a solution for a portal environment that my institution currently has. I have no qualms over it. My only issue was the company that sells it to be known to provide close to 0 fucking support when shit arises.
During a presentation we were told that they were using state of the art JAVA technology to render items on the page and that their ApI was easy for devs to grasp. This caught my attention since I know of very few and obscure Java frameworks that work with frontend tech (as in, your frontend logic is legit in Java)
The sales people proceed to show us React. Obviously thinking that no one knows what REact was. The dude continues with "This is new Java tech" all proud and shit prompting me to interject that it is "Javascript" the dude brushes it away saying "same thing" to which I reply with "Negative, please make sure that you properly discern Java from Javascript since Java is to Javascript as car is to carpet, completely different environments" the dude sarcastically says that "oh well, didn't know one of the people here was more aware of our own technology than we are" to which I say "and not only that, but the final say in us adopting your tech is mine, so I would rather you keep the sarcasm and the attitude to yourself, bring in a tech person if need be and learn these distinctions since we don't work with Java"
My new director later on went to talk to me since he apparently thought that Java and JS were related in some way. I can't really fault it, last time the dude touched programming was in the early 2000s, previous boss was a C and COBOL developer, but the previous dude would ALWAYS take my word no questions ask, this dude was there asking me if I was sure that Javascript and Java were really completely different environments asking me to show him.
I do not like to be questioned. I shoot the shit here and don't really involve myself with more technical aspects under this platform unless it involves concrete architecture discussions and even there I really don't care with engaging on a forum concerning that. But concerning my job I really.......really do not like to be questioned by people that know way the fuck less than me. I started coding when I was 17, I am 30 now, with a degree and years of experience. I really hate to be questioned by this dude.2 -
fuck these websites thAT ARE GETTING SO GOD DAMN HEAVY THEY LOAD WHEN I TURN OFF THE WIFI.
literally just fuckin shut off the wifi while this one bloated, shitty website loading aND THE WEBSITE DISPLAYED. of course, the gigabytes of javascript haven't loaded so the buttons weren't functional, bUT AT LEAST I COULD SEE THE CONTENT INSTEAD OF A WHITE SCREEN.
if ur gonna have a shitload of assets at least make your websites be viewable while the page is loading13 -
As I am working with WordPress for the really first time I am making horrible experiences now.
My client wants a simple submenu on the sidebar if the user is logged in else he want the login form to be there. Easy peezy done with php and just good old plain html. Maybe some JavaScript to make the login process asynchronous.
But fucking bitch - NO. As I found out after searching and digging. I have to create a menu in wp-admin first. Then add a menu-widget to the sidebar. And then install a plug-in to make the links only visible for logged in user. Wtf?
WordPress takes all the joy in doing web development for me. I won't do that anymore. I will force all new clients to use proper tools to make their shit work for them. And as I am the expert in this things I am the one who suggests the right tool.
Fuck this shit.8 -
It's 00:54. I'm supposed to wake up at 8.30AM. Not even tired. In front of my computer, with a frozen Visual Studio Code on the left screen and a frozen Madeon music on the right screen.
My CMS won't get compiled anymore, due to lack of memory. I have 16gb of RAM, gave it 4 of them, and it froze. If I give it less, it just won't compile. Why. I can't figure out wether if it's my code which has some memory leaks or if there's just too much JavaScript in it. What did fuck up? My code? React? Material-UI? The way I want to mix them all together? Maybe I just shouldn't have used React to cover up everything, and maybe I shouldn't have used Ruby on Rails the way I did.
Fuck.
What do I do now.10 -
So I just recently had the pleasure to set up a Rails environment for a friend on Windows. I haven't used Windows in about 5 or 6 years, and the person I had to set it up for doesn't know much about programming at all.
I all went fine at first, install database, devkit thingy and git. Then set up the project itself. And there is where the problems started.
First windows would refuse to use SSL, because of some weird bug in the Windows version of rubygems. The suggested upgrade did not work so I had to switch some gem sources to insecure connections, but at least it did install everything correctly.
Alright, I thought, that's not _that_ bad, everything is running now.
He sent me a screenshot some time later. Something was wrong with the JavaScript runtime, and I could not figure out for the life of me what the issue was.
Later again he sent me another screenshot.
His Antivirus spyware was messing with the asset pipeline. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
This was the point where I just said "FUCK IT, i'll just put everything into a fucking VM and let him use that".
I should have done that in the first place.
Long story short:
Setting up a development under Windows is painful.
Do yourself a favor and just use a VM.3 -
Company has me giving interviews and today brought the second "Sr JavaScript Developer" that's gotten past multiple people that can't even construct a fucking "for" loop.
Get the fuck out of here... And those excuses at the end trying to explain your "industry experience" just annoy me further.
If I have to smile, thank, and shake another one of these fucktards hands, I'm gonna scream!11 -
Holy shit firefox, 3 retarded problems in the last 24h and I haven't fixed any of them.
My project: an infinite scrolling website that loads data from an external API (CORS hehe). All Chromium browsers of course work perfectly fine. But firefox wants to be special...
(tested on 2 different devices)
(Terminology: CORS: a request to a resource that isn't on the current websites domain, like any external API)
1.
For the infinite scrolling to work new html elements have to be silently appended to the end of the page and removed from the beginning. Which works great in all browsers. BUT IF YOU HAPPEN TO BE SCROLLING DURING THE APPENDING & REMOVING FIREFOX TELEPORTS YOU RANDOMLY TO THE END OR START OF PAGE!
Guess I'll just debug it and see what's happening step by step. Oh how wrong I was. First, the problem can't be reproduced when debugging FUCK! But I notice something else very disturbing...
2.
The Inspector view (hierarchical display of all html elements on the page) ISN'T SHOWING THE TRUE STATE OF THE DOM! ELEMENTS THAT HAVE JUST BEEN ADDED AREN'T SHOWING UP AND ELEMENT THAT WERE JUST REMOVED ARE STILL VISIBLE! WTF????? You have to do some black magic fuckery just to get firefox to update the list of DOM elements. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DEBUG MY WEBSITE ON FIREFOX IF IT'S SHOWING ME PLAIN WRONG DATA???!!!!
3.
During all of this I just randomly decided to open my website in private (incognito) mode in firefox. Huh what's that? Why isn't anything loading and error are thrown left and right? Let's just look at the console. AND IT'S A FUCKING CORS ERROR! FUCK ME! Also a small warning says some URLs have been "blocked because content blocking is enabled." Content Blocking? What is that? Well it appears to be a supper special supper privacy mode by firefox (turned on automatically in private mode), THAT BLOCKS ALL CORS REQUESTS, THAT MAY OR MAY NOT DO SOME TRACKING. AN API THAT 100% CORS COMPLIANT CAN'T BE USED IN FIREFOXs PRIVATE MODE! HOW IS THE END USER SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT??? AND OF COURSE THE THROWN EXCEPTION JUST SAYS "NETWORK ERROR". HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL THE USER THAT FIREFOX HAS A FEAUTRE THAT BREAKS THE VERY BASIS OF MY WEBSITE???
WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE NORMAL FIREFOX??????????????????
I actually managed to come up with fix for 1. that works like < 50% of the time -_-5 -
So apparently hiring these days is all about 1/3 learning random questions and answers 1/3 remembering algorithms from code execution portals 1/3 luck. Well fuck my life, it’s worse then 5 years ago when I last switched jobs.
So how was it 5 years ago you ask ?
I send my cv with exposed java interviewed for javascript and hired for python. At least then it was 50/50 luck.5 -
This is the most wtf thing that happened me with Javascript, I had a regular expression and it caused bugs only with 4 digits long words, then I just noticed this:
/^.{3}$/.test(null) // false
/^.{4}$/.test(null) // true
What the fuck, I can't believe that who designed the .test method didn't think to avoid null coercion2 -
At work they assigned me to another project.
Now I need to work with JS instead of Java.
Plot twist: I have 0 experience with JS and about the same amount of knowledge.
GL to me5 -
I need to delay execution of code in a for loop, how do I do that?
PHP: Sleep(3000)
Javascript:
const waitFor = (ms) => new Promise(r => setTimeout(r, ms))
const asyncForEach = (array, callback) => {
for (let index = 0; index < array.length; index++) {
await callback(array[index], index, array)
}
}
const start = async () => {
await asyncForEach([1, 2, 3], async (num) => {
await waitFor(50)
console.log(num)
})
console.log('Done')
}
start()
Fuck you Javascript17 -
fuck javascript
node.js module system sucks. Like its module system is trash, who will want to download some fucking 1GB worth of packages to create a new project.
People keep on just creating other package managers. Yarn is good enough because it caches your packages but still, i am just from deleting some 2.2Gb node modules from my computer and just whyy ?
An area where internet connection us shitty and expensive it is just not very well.
Fuck javascript is everywhere so i have to use it,
typescript just adds another layer to the heavy lifting. You write some typed code to 'reduce bugs' but you generate much more heavy code. I could write in 1kb js file but i end up getting some 3kb js because what - i used typescript-ügvjpiahdjb
fuck javascript14 -
Why do we post here? Is this just an outlet for our intrusive thoughts? A therapy session for things we can't articulate in meetings? Being able to say controversial things we are not allowed to say other places?
It feels like this place exists outside of time and reality. It really is refreshing, sometimes frustrating, and sometimes really offensive. Things that exist here that would not be tolerated elsewhere:
1. alternate ideas of software, sometimes politics, theories of existence, people liking javascript
2. ostream (I love you man)
3. bullying
4. saying what you really feel
5. telling people to fuck off
What would we do without this place?
Meanwhile my intrusive thoughts:
17 -
*PTSD kicks in* Hello darkness, my old friend... :')
At least after 5 years, this time it took me only few seconds, to locate the source of the problem, and fix it.
PS: fuck you javascript... STILL. FUCK. YOU!!!
20 -
First day of web server programming class. The teacher clearly doesn't know anything. He doesn't even know what the course is about! When someone asks him what it is, he mumbles about "dynamic" something... Then he says we will be using the languages JavaScript, MVC, and PHP. What the fuck. MVC? LANGUAGE?
He then tries to come up with some project we could make, and is not going to teach anything apparently. Keep in mind, most people in this class have very little previous experience with programming.
After not saying anything for a long time, he finally tells us to make a clock in JavaScript. A CLOCK. He is supposed to teach how to make Web APIs and such, but instead, he tells us to make a clock in JavaScript, and that's it.
What. The. Fuck.10 -
A government website that I wanted to try and scrape data from to make a better app, I've actually found to be the pinnacle of a demonstration of what NOT to do...
Containing a JavaScript file that not only had got code copied 3 times (changed the tiniest bit on each) for what environment it's on, but has ALSO got the API keys for all 3 environments, AND the APIs they've made it call from there pass FULL SQL right in the query string...
What. The. Actual. Fuck?!5 -
I applied for software engineer in a software development firm. It clearly states in my resume that I am mainly a PHP developer in my current job. The company I applied for focuses on javascript frontend frameworks with Java Spring or node.js as backend.
The screening consisted of three parts; written exams, panel interview and the final interview. It lasted for a whole day, and when It's time for the final interview, the interviewer said that there are no slots left for trainee/junior level which is my level with 5 yrs experience in the industry.
I understand that this means that I will be trained with the technology that they are using so it will be an entry-level job but I submitted my resume several days ago and they didn't reviewed it first before making me attend the screening. I just wasted my time with this! They could've said from the start that they are not looking for people that do not have any experience with this technology/framework.
Fuck6 -
JSF: Yeah, we make it so can focus on what's important and you never have to write HTML or CSS like those lowly web developers.
Also JSF: You can't nest <h:form> components because nested forms are invalid HTML. Oh, that breaks the composite component you were trying to use? Ha, fuck off.
Primefaces: You know how you can just provide an ID and OverlayPanel will open on its own? Well, for a Dialog, the API is completely different. Here's a glob of JavaScript in an onclick event.
I swear this entire thing was regurgitated by a murder of seagulls.1 -
What seemed like a simple task of upgrading our angular project and adding universal to it, is slowly beginning to feel like an impossible mission.
Fuck you npm, fuck windows and fuck whoever thinks javascript/typescript can be used for every god damn thing.
I fucking give up -
The platform my school is using was obviously designed and developed by people who hate students.
I've seen the teacher panel, and it looks really intuitive, allowing you to see test scores, missing assignments, attendance records easily, and it was obviously well thought-out
however, the UX as a student is a goddamn nightmare
First of all, there's like 5 different places where an instructor can post an assignment, so good luck keeping track of your work
Second of all, there's no way to sort assignments by completion status or due date. Just by when assigned
Third of all, the only way to see your grade in a class is if you dig through a series of menus and submenus and sidebars so complex and stupid it puts the Jira UI to shame
And finally, one of the 'features' of this platform is that students can submit a textbox with markdown formatting natively on the platform. And that should work great and all, but APPARENTLY THE FUCKING DEVELOPERS HAVE NEVER HEARD OF LOCALSTORAGE AND YOU JUST LOSE YOUR WORK IF YOU EVER CLOSE THE TAB FOR ANY REASON!
WITH NO FUCKING WARNING! NOT EVEN A LITTLE JAVASCRIPT ALERT OF ANYTHING!
JUST POOF! AN HOUR OF WORK GONE! YAY!
In conclusion, fuck you2 -
I love Google Docs.
I hate their white-only style.
I love writing at night...
So I made myself a userscript to help my eyes when working late. Unfortunately they have css classes' names constantly changing (dynamically generated) with each update of the source code and I was too lazy to go full javascript on them because it'd make a lot of "getElement..." stuff or even jQuery only to change the theme.
It wasn't like full broken page, no... only some elements were broken, but in places it'd burn your eye out in 2am when the theme is almost black.
I felt like I have to do something, because I don't want to lose the Docs at night, but writing on their email list would be like talking to the wall. Then they updated again, some elements changed again and I was like... man, fuck you!
div#doclist > div > div > div > div > div > div > div > div+div
div#doclist > div > div > div > div > div > div > div > div > div > div+div
It works, if you are interested: https://github.com/KeyWeeUsr/...18 -
My Teacher wouldn't understand the responsiveness of UI I designed and gave me 10pts for that.
I was told that my design is too unrealistic and idealistic for it to implement..
I used some css framework(to reduce the amount of work to be done) and javascript.
My dream is to become a web developer and make Desktop application with a use of ElectronJS(Currently devRantron is using).
One last thing... FUCK YOU, FOR GIVING ME A LOW SCORE FOR MY DESIGN.6 -
Just spent 20 mins trying to figure out why new lines weren't printing and why random '0's were in the text.
Turns out I was replacing with +"\n" which JavaScript converts to a 0.
Fuck this8 -
Here I am for three months trying to implement TypeScript in this project that was a dump when I picked it up.
And then some morons get assigned to the project and just start adding @ts-nocheck everywhere?
Like, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?
And then you wonder why the project is bug-ridden??
FUCK THESE PEOPLE THAT CALL THEMSELVES JAVASCRIPT ENGINEERS!! NO WONDER JS GETS SUCH BAD PRESS WITH ALL THESE CLUELESS IDIOTS TO WHOM STATIC TYPING IS JUST AN OBSTACLE TO THEM CHURNING OUT LINE AFTER LINE OF "CODE"3 -
Today I learned that for boolean HTML attributes, they are considered true if they're present on the element at all, regardless of their value. And that as a rule, you should specify the empty string("") in value.
This wounds me on a logic level since everywhere else in JS, "" is false.
What.
The.
Fuck.
Seriously. Why?14 -
every fucking time I use Javascript.
(yes, I'm no expert, but I can pick up ANY LANGUAGE and do this task in FIVE FUCKING MINUTES, NOT AN HOUR!!! FUCK!)
"Gee, I think this button should probably list the total recipients of the mailing, looks like I have to get the total of a column in an object, no problem, hell, i'll do it frontside just for the fuck of it'
yeah, seemed like a good idea.. AN HOUR AGO
ARRRGGGH
fucking javascript scope can take a flying leap off of a tall building, and then NOT FALL to the fucking ground because it will fucking tell me that OOPS gravity doesn't exist for javascript!
UNCAUGHT REFERENCE ERROR
right?
FUCK YOU
die from gravity like you deserve motherfucker16 -
Urgent: I got a coding camp JavaScript Instructor job very well paid expects answer tomorrow. I got another company wants me but they don't have offer as they must get permission from the CEO for a developer job. The developer job would pay less than instructor job
I don't know what the fuck to do. I would like the dev job for experience but I haven't worked for 3 fucking months.10 -
It's disgusting how a package like compress-commons can have 1.3 million weekly downloads yet no documentation whatsoever and not even any relevant comments in the code. Honestly fuck the javascript ecosystem3
-
What in the flying fuck is happening with this fuckery. Geezus fucking hell man...this is some top level fuckery. It's some grade A fuckery. It is about the most fucky thing I had ever fucking seen in a while. Fuck it. That's it...i am going full time Golang or C++ dev.
Peace bitches i am out.
https://zdnet.com/google-amp/...5 -
Visual studio intellisense is going to make me commit bridge jump
In HTML, it's changing "id" to "itemid" ???
In JavaScript, it's changing document.getElementById and document.querySelectorAll to documentgetElementById and documentquerySelectorAll ????
What the fuck is this horse shit. It's only getting worse and worse. It's like Mt. Saint Helen blew up 5 minutes ago, they updated the system, and accidentally set off the Yellowstone Giga-volcano. Fuck you, william gates.5 -
Automated functional testing using selenium and javascript bindings
aka
FUCK FUCK FUCK Driven Development2 -
So my friend told me that he recommended me to be a new Creative Engineer.
-Oh shit, sweet, what are the requirements?
-I don't really understand that kind of stuff man, just look it up, here' the link
*Hmmm*
-Html,
*ok*
-Css,
*mhmm*
-Javascript
*sure*
etc etc...
and,
Actionscript
...
Excuse me?
Who the FUCK use actionscript nowadays ???2 -
!!!!!!!!RANT!
today (~9h ago) i was in college lab, alone, and few minutes later 2 seniors came in and sat behind me and started working on some webpage and they were talking about HTML and CSS and all of a sudden one guy says "how can we make a page responsive?" and other guy goes "we use JavaScript"
my brain: "wtf, JavaScript?? are you nuts? responsive pag- are you fucking cra- why am i even- why the fuck would you say Jav- why God why??”
i had to get that off chest...6 -
Just had a recruiter contact me, and found this gem in their text:
"We work with MS stack and SQL Server, but we really think JavaScript is the way of the future"
Motherfucker, JavaScript can hardly tell basic types apart, how the fuck you gon' run a relational database with it!? And if you're not, then why the fuck are you running a relational database in the first place!?
Fuck outta here!2 -
Javascript days are counted... I've been away from the dev world for a little bit and instead of writing bugs I've been invested in reading news portals and checking on fucking frameworks...
Web Assembly its gaining traction and projects like Blazor are already showing its potential... I cant wait for things be v1, in any case... fucking Javascript its soon to be "that fucking shit we use to use".
No one truly likes javascript, and if you do like it you are probably the kind of person who like to rape babies anyway.8 -
Big plays...
function collapseView(element){
/**
*it doesnt work at the first time, the function needs to be called again
*/
element.collapse();
element.collapse();
}
Literally copy and paste this code..1 -
So we got a new Front-End intern today.
My senior was demonstrating to her how to minify and beautify JavaScript codes.
And I'm like WTF dude she has worked with Front-End technologies and she knows that.
And who the fuck beautifies and again minify jQuery script. Totally idiot.2 -
I'm so fucking fed up with the npm ecosystem. Every single god damn time I've had to do anything it always takes DAYS to figure out how to get anything working and I always have to try multiple tools or libraries to final get it half way sorta.
I'm so fucking annoyed right now. They always turn out not that great, have lacking features or trivial oversights in functionality and ALWAYS have garbage documentation.
I just want to build a fucking npm library with TypeScript to be used with node. That's probably the NUMBER 1 use case so how fucking hard can that be?
So obviously I start out with tsc. That's quite simple, compiles all my stuff and shits out .js and .d.ts files. Okay so how do I use them via es6 import? I don't fucking know, because it doesn't work no matter what I do. The 'module' option in tsconfig is absolutely useless btw. It does *literally* fuck all. Nada. Absolutely nothing.
Okay I'm far from defeated, maybe I'll just have to bundle it. So I waste two days finding something that half works (I'm using fusebox right now) and at last I get a stupid es6 module as a single bundle... But what about type the declarations? They are nowhere to be seen and of course there's no option for that. Because Fusebox the pile of shit that's oh so well Typescript integrated apparently doesn't think TYPE DECLARATION FILES are needed. What the actual fuck.
And that's where I'm now. I need the fucking .d.ts files so I can use it as a module with import. Do I really need another fucking piece of shit tool that bundles these files? Honestly fuck all of this. "Oh the Javascript ecosystem is so great" YEAH fucking great, alright. Where 90% of the ESTABLISHED tools and libraries (we don't talk about the landfill of all the other shit) flat out don't do what you need. Again, how fucking hard can it be to make a npm lib with typescript? That should be NATIVELY SUPPORTED. If not by npm atleast by typescripts tsc.
FUCK NPM. FUCK JAVASCRIPT. AND FUCK THE WHOLE ECOSYSTEM4 -
Been coding and learning for 3 years and still don’t even feel close to try and look for a job. FUCK. Don’t wanna be a valet driver forever.
11 -
Javascript in general (jquery, Ajax, nodejs and so on) is my greatest weakness. I've been working on a project which a great part is js and it's slapping in my face that I don't really know js. It's frustrating as fuck but it's a great experience, because I can now work on my weakness and turn it into my greatest strength. So let's see how it goes. If I don't smash my head into a wall in absolute rage that is...5
-
Don't need Netflix when you have a production deployment right before a long weekend. It has failed since last two weeks due to vulnerabilities present in one of libraries(P.S. FUCK JAVASCRIPT and Post release vulnerability scans!). You have rewritten the whole functionality from scratch twice! Security gates finally open for you, welcoming with arms wide open. So you click Deploy! DAFUQ!! FUCK MY LIFE! Deployment failed! It's only a 3 hour window to deploy! You frantically re-review your code, is it me?? Not again!! It isn't! Well, why is the deployment failing, you work against the clock. Going through configs, code, documentation! WTF is it?? Should I give up and raise a support ticket? Nope! You login to the server, sifting through logs and configs, there's a couple of other tickets with today's deadline. What are you going to do? And you get a hint! You take the hunch, change the config 5 minutes before deadline!
Get merge request approved, wait for the build, hit DEPLOY!! Nail biting 3 minutes! Your eyes fixed on the logs! Building..... Pushing instances..... Starting App..... SUCCESS!!! Finish the remaining tickets! Your long weekend still exists!3 -
Fucking love how one-liner packages are breaking basically the entire JS ecosystem every once in a while. Why the fuck do you add one-liner packages as dependencies in your code?9
-
I have so much shit I want/need to learn. I've started learning C while picking JavaScript back up, I'm learning basic electronics but I have a lot planned for that. Not even related but I want to fucking Cook, yeah i said it i wanna cook but why does that make me feel like i should just stop and go back to programming. Idk I just spill shit in these rants. Also wanna learn to speak another langauge but can't find the time, and I have college and dude I'm trying and trying and I need someone to appreciate something I do before I flip or before C destroys my entire being from being the weirdest yet interesting yet fucking brain melting. And fuck JS I Love it but sometimes it's a twat let's be honest4
-
Looking for platform specific language options for a new project at work and reading articles from well known sources.
If you start your article with something like, "when I think of a good programming language, I think of JavaScript", I'm going to punch out of your shitty opinion faster than an async function.
When you're trying to convey an unbiased message you generally don't start with, "I'm an absolute shill for {language}".
What the fuck happened to journalistic integrity?7 -
brew install node
keeps going for more than 5 minutes, installing idk dependencies or doing idk wtf
fuck javascript and its ecosystem5 -
So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:
"Does minified javascript improve performance?"
This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:
"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]
Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]
It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]
So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"
So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...2 -
My worst experience has actually been trying to fix someone else's code. One of my friends is in a graphic design class, and right now they have to do a basic site in DreamWeaver (a small nightmare on its own, I've found that the previews they show are never quite correct). I decided I'd at least pop in to help out a bit, cause they kinda have no clue what they're doing. They are graphic design students, NOT developers, and it's very easy to see that.
One of the first things I noticed was EXTREMELY unorganized code, but that's forgivable. But...I once saw probably 5 </body> tags in someone's code, a JavaScript function inside of the <body> tag, and a bunch of CSS statements in the <script> tag that they had one if the JS functions in.
I remember seeing this stuff, and I thought "what the actual fuck?". The dude was like "yeah it's unorganized as hell, I know"
...That's not the problem. CSS goes in either a <style> tag or a separate file (THEY HAD A SEPARATE CSS FILE). JAVASCRIPT GOES IN A <script> TAG OR A SEPARATE FILE
But, I get it. They're graphic design students. They can outdo me in probably everything in the Adobe suite (except DW as I learned). I once watched a girl in there do a project in Illustrator. I had no fucking clue what was going on. And when I was talking to her about it, she said "that's what I was thinking when we were watching you fix our code"
Kinda got a little sidetracked there. Basically, worst experience is non developers writing code for an assignment. -
I've been trying for the last 3 months to land my first development job. I have a good (over 3 years) amount of experience, but no industry experience and no degree. So it's been a uphill battle. Currently working at a call center making garbage and most of my time and energy is invested into this. Currently am not mobile so most of my money is being geared towards that. It's just frustrating to see all these over glorified job postings that ask so much for just entry levels. I haven't even gotten a damn interview, I feel like in houston it's either you have a degree or you are not even considered for just a fucking interview. If I can get at least one they will be able to see my drive, persistence and skills that have been developed overtime. And fuck recruiters, have been interfacing with them over linkedin and not one of them seemed eager (initially yes) to land me an interview. Most of these fucks don't even fucking understand the technology or buzzwords that are on the job posting. If I were a recruiter I would at least put a little research into what the different technologies are so the process will seem less abstract. The tech will have more meaning and maybe I would be able to get a better success rate with clients if I knew what was really required of them. Not just looking at xyz and seeing if client has experience with them, but really see if they know what they are; that way I will have more confidence sending them into an interview. But of course that's not how it works. "Oh yeah Java and javascript are very similar"... get the fuck out of here.13
-
JavaScript: Default exports vs. named exports
Who gives a fuck, honestly? I used to think there was merit to one over the other, but I'm running out of steam to have these silly debates.4 -
I mentioned in a previous rant that one of my favorite games of all times (CrossCode) was written in HTML5 and Javascript. I have been playing the game again (this time on the ps5) and continue to be surprised at the monumental force of the game. So, I decided to take a look at the "original" game engine in which the game is built. ImpactJS. So, apparently (and I have not looked at the inner workings of the code) the creator had a module system in which files could be imported before module imports was a thing in Javascript, not only that but it had a class system mimic in place to deal with things, with inheritance and everything in between. Fucking fascinating. Now, one can actually see the dev logs of a new project that Radical Fish is working on, their primary target remains, but now they seem to be using TypeScript with a plethora of other things in order to build the game, they essentially took the game engine and re-modified the fuck out of it to come with something different. And it fucking worked, beautifully.
From my other findings, it seems that they had to jump through some hoops to get the games to run on consoles, specially the Nintendo Switch which we all know it is a bitch to port into, but apparently the underlying tech is built on Haxe using something known as Kha, a portable multimedia lib.
This is interesting to me as someone that always admired game development, and I sometimes wonder if they would just be better served using something like C# as a target platform with something that they could mold up from the ground up like MonoGame.
I am probably not going to work tomorrow in order to stay in playing the game all day lmao.
Game devs are amazing really. And this game is a jewel, try out the demo online if you have not yet and see what you think:
http://www.cross-code.com/en/home3 -
The borrower
Dart: Can I borrow your let?
JavaScript: Fuck off!
Dart: Please spare me your var then... You don't seem to need it anymore.
JavaScript: I said fuck off weirdo!
Dart: Can I borrow your var?
C#: 🧐... Kotlin. Is that you again?
Dart: No, I'm Dart.
C#: That what?
Dart: Haha, Just Dart.
C#: So, you need my var?
Dart: Yes, and also your String.
C#: Just that.
Dart: and your int, your bool, double and List
C#: Just that.
Dart: All your types... Maybe.
C#: 🚍☎️🗃️💺📺🛏️🎻🔦 🧤 Here you go.
Dart: Thanks💃
Dart: Can I borrow your pointer?
C: 👴 Huhh?
Dart: Your pointer. Yes that pointing stuff.
C: Borrow what?
Dart: Your pointer.
C: Poin...
Dart: Pointer!
C: Ponita
Dart: 🏃...
C: Here is my Pony bear... Hellooo. You there?1 -
<rant>
I was once a pure server side developer. Then came full stack development. So in order to keep up with the competition, I had to brave through front-end development.
But goddamn javascript, make up your mind between functions, and “Objects”.
Also variable visibility. Goddamnit. I thought ES6 was widely supported. I was happy doing const and let bbut goddamn testing frameworks, grunt and shit. Can’t make up it’s mind to support it unitedly.
And lastly, IE. Goddamn it, why the fuck are you not supporting Promise by default. We’re fucking 2017. [insert slowpoke meme]
</rant>
One good thing though, I like the library vuejs.
Bad thing is, this is just the beginning of a much more upcoming headache.4 -
My another attempt to write something in rust and I wanted to try tauri as it’s promising competition to electron.
Why use tauri not electron?
Cause in tauri you can write rust plugins that you can interact with directly from javascript without stupid http servers, mangling code and stuff.
From javascript point you only call one method and pass object with arguments into it.
So it took me entire weekend to create draft plugin to interact with sqlite database.
Documentation of tauri is inconsistent. I understand that cause it’s young project and plugins architecture changed frequently.
Moreover my knowledge of rust is near to zero. But overall it was worth it. I like what I achieved.
I can pass sql query and execute it inside mutex guarded singleton. Like I said before I like it cause I can call my plugin directly from javascript.
I know I wasn’t fancy with my implementation. I just created file database connection from json configuration and managed to receive string sql statements. I just print results with rust to console for now.
I will add sending back results later this week.
For me tauri is already better then electron cause code is clear and there is no workaround ( except singleton with connection - cause of limitations of my rust knowledge ).
Live long tauri and fuck you electron.
https://tauri.studio/en/
if you’re interested.2 -
Does anyone else include greek letters in their JavaScript variable names just to fuck with co-workers?1
-
Sometimes I get in a mode where everyone is a potential enemy. So my mind will be say, "The fuck you say!?" in a reactionary way. When this happens I sometimes respond badly online. I am noticing this pattern before I respond. It can take great effort to not post shit online at times.
My general goals when conversing online these days:
1. Spread joy through humor. (it isn't my problem if you don't think it is funny)
2. Care for people by telling the truth. (it isn't my problem if you don't think its true. I do like exchanging ideas.)
3. Try to listen and help people if they exhibit a perceptible need. (sometimes a lone voice reaching out can make a huge difference)
4. Restrain myself when someone aggressively challenges my beliefs. (work in progress, the fuck you say?!)
5. Sharing common interests with people. (games, programming, staying sane, etc)
6. Shitting on Javascript. (not because it is true, but because it is funny. see goal 1)1 -
Fuck them all who say Java and JavaScript are the same !!!
Feel like to punch them at that instant.6 -
A tool widely use and been perceived as a superset of JavaScript does not have a FUCKING language specification, we have no single clue why certain things are done the way they are done. All we FUCKING do is guess.
Fuck typescript11 -
I think it should be an unspoken rule that if you make an IOT coffee machine the core framework should be written in Java and any plugins or integrations should be written in JavaScript... you know so future generations arnt confused as fuck.9
-
I opened "About" screen
I read "Write native Android/IOS apps with JavaScript"
A second later: "devRant stopped unexpectedly"
Okay :D -
> be me
> recruiter: *sends a LinkedIn request with a message, I saw your profile, you're quite proficient in javascript and jQuery, do you want to work with us with cutting edge meteorjs stack*
> me : *the fuck ?! I don't even know that library exists, replies anyway for a call*
> me:...okay I'll call before I come in
> me: *quick look on their website which is built on meteorjs, fucking beautiful*
> me: *opens console out of curosity*
> me: holy shit, what the fuck? they're loading jQuery 1.1.2 over HTTP and website is on HTTPS, top of that they are loading jQuery libraries before jQuery.
> me : *reports to the recruiter*
> recruiter: thanks, we'll look into it
> ???
> profit
and I don't plan to work a place like that3 -
Our fucking life is short, we all going to die sooner or later, thats sad. To make the matter worse, every fucking software will eventually be written in Javascript. Fuck.1
-
Trying to put together all the code of my ajax request into a function so I do not repeat myself. The code works perfectly outside but not in the function. Well fuck JavaScript. I've been stuck here for two days.19
-
Just wasted 30 mins of my life wondering where the fuck this bug is coming from. This is why i fucking hate javascript.
7 -
fuck javascript
took me an hour, but I finally figured out why the date was so wack
can you?
admittedly not strong in js, cuz I hate it
7 -
Ok I love JavaScript but this is enough.
I know selectors like these shouldn't exist, but double escaping? Hell no! I didn't even know it was a thing! I wonder what's the highest level of n escaping there is out there.
6 -
To the newbies out there, those who just study and work hard, do you ever feel like you can’t do it? Like what the fuck is the point. You work your shit job and get home and code but kinda just look at your code editor for hours without typing anything? There are times I feel like that. I stay up all night and go to work at a shit job where were accused of stealing shit and it’s like, dude shut the fuck up, but when you get home, you know you’re gonna be a Developer one day, but you just don’t know how you’re gonna get there. Keep on pushing. It’ll come and you can leave you’re shit job. I promise that.
-
"My code is explain itself. Well, I need no comments to understand it."
I don't care if you wan't to write comments or not; If don't write any then i don't care because fuck you and your code.
May it be java, kotlin, python, javascript or anyother language, you think "everyone can read", i hope you'll never find anyone who has to deal with you and your cancerous code.7 -
JavaScript is shit! The only JavaScript frameworks I've liked so far is Angular 2 onwards all the way upto 5, and that's only because it's in TypeScript. Fucking JavaScript! How did it even get here!? So anything with JS, please save us all the gut wrenching, testicle crushing, ass fucking without lube pain.... fuck JavaScript!1
-
Omg I loath path separators. Been working on windows most of the time (bought a surface pro for some reason) and my colleagues work on Linux. We just do standard web dev stuff nothing special but. I started having issues with my windows build getting weird function.prototype.bind.apply is not a constructor issue. Which is valid because apparently my colleagues started using the fat arrow function everywhere and on places where not needed.......
But on Linux they never had an issue because babel fixed it to the old function during the transpileee. So why the fuck am I getting this problem. After some tedious debugging and asking my colleagues. (colleagues only responded with just use Linux) I found the the issue to lie in the webpack loader for the Javascript in which the path regex used a single / :(. So I changed that to a group to be / or // and bam the whole bloody project works on windows now.
....... My colleagues still don't understand that they over use the fat arrow in the wrong places unfortunately3 -
Well AI is made by some developer so why not just swing with the technology. When JavaScript Framework because famous (jQuery, Ionic, React) we started using them like an asshole. Similar way when AI takes over, let's switch to AI.
All I wish is that AI doesn't fuck my girlfriend/wife. I will implement very strict rules.1 -
I understand JavaScript but I cannot for the love of fucking JavaScript Zeus understand how the fuck all those front end technologies work. Maaaaaaaan I suck at my job.11
-
Gonna update my discord bot! But I'm gonna rewrite it all in JavaScript because FUCK Discord.py honestly a horrible community and shit docs it just didnt feel right at all the only reason i stuck with it because it was my senior project and my first big project9
-
Lately I take work literally seriously, not due to motivation but due to fear, more on that later, but this is what I think about lately while I'm working
> that line of code should fix it
> oh shit I should've checked logs
> let me check logs
> let me put 10 breakpoints in code and javascript in chrome
> why is this bug not reproducing?
> why I have to work on someone else's spaghetti code?
> this loop iterates over all customers' data I'll just step over it, Oh fuck I resumed
etc etc
I'm feared because where I live, isn't a good place for software developers as there aren't companies which hire, those who hire need ninja developers who complete 1 JIRA Sprint/Phase in 1 day, Here I feel safe as there are people to correct me plus coffee machine -
Javascript makes me wanna blow my fucking brains out.
Why the fuck isn't appendChild working? It shouldn't be this fucking hard to get a simple result.
p = document.createElement("p");
p.textContent = String(new Date().getTime());
doc = document.getElementById("todoList")
doc.appendChild(p);
Done from within a listener function for another element, listening for onkeyup. Using bulma.
Jesus fucking christ and this is the profession I chose.
At this rate by the time I'm fucking competent I'll be replaced by wage slaves from india who started training at the age of ten because their government actually gives a shit about investing in their people instead of saddling new generations with trillions in bank debt so goldman fucking sachs can hire more underage prostitutes from epstein and mossad.23 -
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
Working with google shit is a fucking nightmare.
WHY DO THEY HAVE TO REINVENT EVERYTHING ALL OVER AGAIN?
Javascript already have a very standardised way of handling env variables. It's called dotenv. It's simple. It's efficient. But of course google can't have it and must use their own version WITH ENV VARIABLES BEING SETTABLE ONLY THROUGH CLI. Because who would ever want some kind of end user friendliness. That's for the weak, like users of netlify.
Fuck you, google. I wish you could rot in hell.
5 -
why the fuck am I stuck using a "custom javascript framework based on angular.js" instead of NORMAL FUCKING ANGULAR LIKE REGULAR PEOPLE DO.4
-
Working for unappreciative fucktard clients who believe they know more about dev than a seasoned professional and try to give me advise on how to approach my work and or solve programming issues. FUCK Sake if you know it then don't hire me you fucktard client.
My best experience is working for a small company and bridging their disconnected systems together using an array of programming languages such as Go, PHP, VB, Batch Script, Javascript and C -
So I've made this plan of what I'm gonna learn/practice/study programming wise. Some of it involves learning new languages and I'm always told i shouldnt be hopping between languages but I really want to learn fucking PHP and C# even fucking C to help my python and it's not like its overwhelming but I hate when I get told to not bounce between languages IVE BEEN USING PYTHON FOR A YEAR AND A HALF I THINK ITS TIME FOR ME TO POLISH MY JAVASCRIPT AND LEARN A FEW MORE LANGAUGES LIEK FUCK3
-
Started using typescript and other than the toxic wasteland that is NPM, I'm actually quite enjoying my time. Fuck javascript in the ass, typescript is like a nice dick pic to that ex who called to threaten your life for the third time that day. Different phone numbers every time too. Fuck JS.2
-
My fucking god!! I swear if i meet the guy who implemented Array.reduce in javascript!! I'll tear his god damn head clean off and stuff it down his throat!!
From the spec: "if the initial value is omitted, the first value of the array is used instead and skipped"
WHO TF THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA!?!!?!
One freaking hour that stuff cost me today RRREEEEEEEEEE
# rm -rf $JAVASCRIPT
Please and thank you!7 -
Fuck JavaScript!
Seriously, it's always like this:
> "Hey, look <module name> seem cool, let's try it!"
> Find a tutorial
> Tutorial is 3 to 6 months old
> Should be good
> Everything is deprecated
> Come on...
> Back to C I guess.
It's moving waayyyy to fast.
It's frustrating...19 -
Webpack? More like Fudgepack 😡
OK sure, I know it's cool to rip on Webpack without taking 5 minutes to understand it, but I really have tried. Every time I want to do anything which used to be trivial with grunt, gulp or brunch, it requires a whole bunch of sorcery and every post I see online around the same topic inevitably ends with something like "that's not modular", "WebPack doesn't work like that", "you're holding your phone wrong" etc. And it's not like I'm someone who is afraid of new or uncomfortable things. I try new languages almost as often as there are new JavaScript fads (OK maybe not THAT often). I use "weird" keywords and experiment with different key maps all the time. I swap my daily window manager on an almost quarterly basis (and xmonad is no picnic as an introduction to Haskell). But what the fuck is it with so many people in positions of influence in the frontend world always taking one step forward, two steps back and an occasional hop sideways when it comes to tooling (and dragging everyone else along with them)?
How did such a turd of a tool become defacto for so many frontend frameworks? Do hard core JavaScripters just really really hate outsiders and want to deter others from their precious as much as possible? Fuck Webpack and fuck everyone responsible for helping it permeate so thoroughly through the software development industry.2 -
FUCK JAVASCRIPT!!! I JUST DECIDED TO LEARN DAMN EXPRESS AND NODEJS THEN I HAVE ISSUES WITH ROUTING ISSUES WITH VIEW ENGINES !!! ARGH!!! ITS SO SICKENING I HAVE TO REQUIRE() SHIT AND SHIT WTF??? JS?? WTF JS?? 50 LINES OF CODE FOR JUST A VIEW THAT SAYS "HELLO WORD" AHH FUCK IT, ***FALLS BACK TO PHP** BYE.7
-
react is garbage because javascript is garbage
like trying to draw straight lines but there's no straight edges to work with
fuck hooks , im too salty and stupid to learn this shit1 -
No proper normalization and database structure practices seems to continue to be the bane of my fucking existence at work.
One would think that it would be the quirks carried through by the language stacks in question, those are fucking absolutely ridiculously horrible by the way, y'all think you've seen bad Javascript and PHP? these would make you cry, laugh, wonder in amazement and then fucking pity me and eventually buy me a beer NO JOKE.
Y'all think you have seen some obscenely unoptimized SQL code? think of the worst fucking possible output from the shitty-est most error prone boundary checking inefficient ORM out there and multiply it by 10k. Then refer to my other point, and do the same thing for me which culminates in alcoholic consumption.
Worst thing? the developer that wrote most of this is a college level TEACHER rn....i've met the smug piece of shit, he acted severely condescending to everyone around him and I just smiled because I know how much of a piece of shit he is.
The other dude in question (it was two of them that I am talking about) left for another city and currently holds a senior developer position....i-fucking-magine that.
Fuck I hate these mfkers and I really wish they gave me a chance to fucking blow up on them.2 -
The frontend developers in my company are the reason why I have anxiety. Here are few things that grinds my knees:
1) for a long time in projects, they deleted the auth token from their storage without integrating the logout api. They thought why use an API for that. :)
2) most of them had no clue that form fields could accept javascript as inputs and work as XSS vulnerabilities. This actually happened with a client, he got so fucking pissed.
3) One of them asked me to convert a PATCH request to DELETE cos fuck REST and HTTP methods.
For fuck’s sake. I need to get out of this place.4 -
I hate it when an opinion is valued by someone seniority.
Sure, you might not like react, fine, but if your only argument for that is it being built by Facebook, you're just an ass.
Sure, you might not like node, fine, but if your only argument for that is your prejudice towards javascript , you're just an ass.
Normally this guy is pretty nice, but fuck you for talking about shit you don't understand6 -
Fuck all those special snowflake npm packages who each implement their own incomprehensible documents format and even make an ugly ass website full of lies for it.
Next to JavaScript, this is the biggest reason why I hate frontend development with a passion.2 -
Fuck me man this is the second time this week! Planning on going fully to Ubuntu mint.... But I'm not sure if that's the best solution for me
Need a good distro for web development
(php, mysql, Javascript) any other recommendations or should I stick to mint?
13 -
First Rant...
Why the fuck do I get on a C++ interview the question if I now Javascript......everytime.... NO I DON'T WANT TO KNOW JAVASCRIPT!!!
Real coders code in C/C++ and not hipster javascript. Am I alone???(probably)10 -
Got recruiter spam from a "devs only" super-hip recruiting company. As they announced in the mail, they develop themselves and know the difference between Java and Javascript. On their blog where the last post is from more than one year ago, they have hints how to pimp up one's resume. Amongst other useful things: don't use Comic Sans.
WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!5 -
Im back at University and need to code Java for my Semester Grades. My main languages are PHP and JavaScript.
Reading a book right now where it says "Java Developers are happy".
NOPE aint nobody happy about Java. Sad fucking Author of the Book, go fuck youself and retire. Java needs to retire itself, there are more modern languages available.7 -
fuck php and fuck it's whitespace header not sent bullshit, apparently there a bazillion ways the header function may just refuse to work, all for a function javascript does way better13
-
Silent errors in web-y tech like html, jsp, javascript , etc can fuck right off. I wish they'd silently kill me instead and end my fucking misery.
On the other hand maybe I just need to git God and just write perfect code the 1st time the way an old prof of mine recommended as the best way. Just draw 2 circles and then the fucking owl right? -
Looking at vacancies and the JS build tools asked (Babel, Gulp) and then visiting their websites I notice that I don't understand what they are going on about.
"Leverage gulp and the flexibility of JavaScript to automate slow, repetitive workflows and compose them into efficient build pipelines."
What the actual corpo fuck?
The "get started" page expects you already know npm, typescript, and when you look at their pages, well... Where does the circlejerk end and the actual Javascript start?
I've been out of the corporate loop for a few years, seems it's all about build tools these days. I need to get out of this industry pronto.3 -
Fuck you javascript. You're the worst. Fuck you fuck you. Why I became a fucking frontend developer. Fuck me and my stupid idea to get hired as a...
Oh nvm found the bug. JS is za best.1 -
So, I'm about to be up shit's Creek. I need a new source of income, ideally either a new job or becoming a freelancer. I have been making intranet sites with ASP.NET for a while now, and I can tell two things:
1. It's too corporate minded, so I'll need a fucking degree
2. It's too corporate minded, so I'll be stuck with people like my boss, who still use tables to align content despite the project having bootstrap.
I need to do something more fulfilling, but I probably will have to leave my job by December anyway due to some major fuck ups in my life, do I need to get something lined up. I have been brushing up on my HTML, CSS, and JavaScript skills, but when it comes down to it, I suck at design so my "portfolio" is blatant clones to learn CSS and shitty Spartan things.
Basically, I'm anxious, terrified, and unable to figure out what comes next. Do I keep sending job applications and praying to whatever deity will listen, it do I start figuring out this freelance thing? If freelance, then how do I get into it? I'm terrified and desperate.1 -
Dear Python devs who complain over state of Javascript. I politely ask you to fuck off because followin reasons. You are praising language witch does not have switch case statement(until 3.10), your async is just a stolen idea from JS and final argument that in pyhon there is one way to do everything is such bullshit when it comes to strings. For some reason i meet JS people who can write Python without much complaining but rarely another way around. Everytime Python fanboy sees JS they need instant tampons to stop their ass bleeding.7
-
Just how can I get the stressball? I know! Im gonna write down three word. Just... Randomly...
Rant:
Fuck, JavaScript, coffe -
Trying out Gnome again, because KDE is "just ok", and Hyprland and DWM are fine, but I wanted to try something different. (Actually DWM is amazing, and Hyprland is sorta weird?)
You know, it's not that bad. Doesn't even seem to be as memory crazy as everyone seems to say either...idk what I did, but it appears to be using around a GB, maybe a little less. Definitely not the experience I remember from the Gnome 2 days. Anyway, I was curious, so I was looking at the source on Github....and why the fuck is there javascript in this DE code? WHY. I do not understand.
Maybe I'm fucking nuts, but I actually kind of like the workflow, once I've applied a couple of "tweaks". But seriously, I am fucking gobsmacked at the JS thing. Why.9 -
IE11 weird behaviour!!
So I'm building a website for management purpose. I'm asked to implement confirm pop up box.
This pop up box uses one div with dynamic content which is created using javascript and not hardcoded in html file.
Here comes the twist. I used append() function to append child elements inside that div. Everything works fine in chrome and Firefox. Pop up shows upon clicking button. But in case of IE 11, on clicking button, It asks user to download fucking json file, instead of showing pop up !!
I'm like WTF is going on??? How the fuck this json file is generated by my code??
Turned out, this happened because of append() function. That doesn't support in IE11. Fixed it, by using appendChild() method.
Don't ask me what kind of data was in that json file. I was too scared to open it!!
Things like this are scary and weird for a fresher like me. :(4 -
Fuck man! Let ME communicate with the other devs who worked on this project. I know you mean well, but when you can't remember the difference between Java and JavaScript, you aren't going to be able to effectively communicate technical details back and forth.
-
Fuck these apache2 and nginx configuration that fucking make my life miserable. Why can\'t I fucking edit the files inside /var/www/html? Fuck that. Why can\'t I access a subdirectory inside it? Fuck! In Node.js, you can fire up your server pretty easily. Then you tell us that JavaScript sucks? Fuck me dead.21
-
So I tried to fix an app today that we made for a client ...
It's a Cordova project that's basically jus a wrapper for a certain section of the client's website that's displayed inside an iframe inside said app (with a bit of additional CSS and such). It's all working fine.
Said section of the website offers two to four different options to choose from, then scrolls down (triggered by JavaScript, window.scrollTop or JQuery's equivalent) to the next selection panel that's dynamically added to the DOM tree, the content's depending on what the user selected before.
The problem is, said scrolling effect inside said iframe does not work inside the iOS version of the app (does, however, when the content of the iframe is viewed (by just visiting the URL) inside Safari), instead, the iframe just scrolls back to top.
So after five and a half hours of depression, anger and rage, also some repetetive cursing towards Apple (just like every time something has to do with their awful products), my boss walks in, looks at me and says:
"I'd be fine with it, if I just had to manually scroll instead".
.........
If it wasn't 5pm already (I usually go home at 6), I would've just left the room / gone home or gotten my salad from the fridge to have something to release my anger on.
Seriously though, what the fuck!? -
Seiously though , Javascript Developer community are toxic shit! All I did was asked a question regarding the syntax.
They started to curse me and call me names , like what the fuck? I just want to know some syntax. Dont have to be an arse.
At least Elixir community is polite.16 -
Fuck you and your new shitty 2018 JavaScript framework built on top of another shit pile of brainfuck libs.
Best Regards.1 -
It’s so funny when old ass software tries to be hip and add a cool new design to their documentation, but they just end up fucking it all up because they don’t know how to setup anything in the modern era. Like I’m looking at these docs but it is fucking with the JavaScript page click events and the FID is like SECONDS longer than the LCP so your like “oh fuck did this shit just crash my computer?!?”. On top of that everything is overflowing with this absolutely positioned nightmare.2
-
So today I thought to polish things on a former colleagues code. I noticed he wrote JavaScript inside PHP file to redirect header to another URL. I don't know what the fuck he was thinking. Why didn't he used PHP Header to redirect the URL why JavaScript?1
-
fuck me I don't know shit
I thought I know pretty much anything I needed to know about JS. I used it a lot. I am using it everytime I needed something done fast.
but I was wrong
I was so fucking wrong
I don't know shit
I didn't knew about prototypes
I didn't knew about apply , call , bind
I didn't knew about this syntax
var T = (function (T){});
JavaScript seems like such a mess now.
I think I m going to let it down3 -
I'm working with a nice piece of code written 6 years ago by somebody who isn't in the company anymore and only the fact that they live on the other side of the continent prevents me from physically strangling them.
They must have thought that they were very smart trying to use JavaScript as a functional language. A shitload of library-specific decorators that ultimately don't do shit except for raising the cognitive load of anybody who hasn't worked with it before. Why the fuck did you use 'curry' in a function that then is never called in a functional manner? Because fuck me, go check the documentation of ramda because you obviously have too much time at work if you ask questions, just to learn fuck all.
It fascinates me how people take this steaming pile of shit that is JavaScript and then try to work against all its design assumptions to create something that is even more slimy, disgusting and smelly. It shows a radical misunderstanding of what you're even working with.
Take shit, add straw and you might have a docent construction material. Take shit, sprinkle it with chilli and try to eat it and it's just hot shit. But at least you will make everyone else try to find out why the fuck is that chilli in there because why would you expect it there. I'm a coprologist, not a cook.3 -
this is not a solution, what the fuck https://github.com/seanmonstar/...
modern era, where a "safe" language can't even do basic bitch network calls right and then you write a retrying loop macro to get around it. yeah I had that already because I didn't have access to reqwest configurations and I think the library I was using to wrap the reqwest calls to the API was doing something wrong. turns out the fucking accepted by a damned GPT bot solution is to JUST KEEP RETRYING?!
WHY IS IT SENDING TERMINATE CONNECTION MESSAGES RANDOMLY
unfathomable. one of the most popular crates on rust. maybe they should care less about their cult and more about their ridiculous-to-have bugs
remember kids, javascript is the devil, JavaScript is ugly, messy, you have brain cancer if you use JavaScript. at least it can do network calls properly without you having to make retry loop MACROS (because the generic system sucks) all over your code!2 -
EPiServer Forms is probably the worst fucking thing to ever exist in terms of Nuget packages. I would rather shove an entire daikon radish up my asshole than trying to debug the stupid fucking mystery that code is. Wanna tie into the JavaScript events to handle payment validation? Go fuck yourself - u can’t use any external functionality.1
-
What exactly is a full-stack developer/engineer? I'm confused.
So, I worked as a freelance webdev for a US company where I redesigned a pretty complicated website from scratch with PHP, mysql, JavaScript, CSS, HTML5. I only mention those because it will important later.
Basically, it's a lame mvc framework I wrote which heavily relied on AJAX and bootstrap modals.
I built from mysql <=> PHP -> UI
I Also built an android app that communicates with the php api
I worked for 4.6 years and they were kind enough to give me the designation "Full Stack Engineer" so I could put that on my resume. Alright, cool.
Then I go to this interview and one interviewer took offense. He told me that, there are 3 tiers of web dev; Database, Backend shit and UI. And I'm not a full-stack engineer. He then asked me if I worked with frameworks like laravel, symphony etc. [I did but not in this project]. I didn't know what to say. The other interviewer tried to help me, "Do you know what it means? Or have you ever worked with React.js or Angular?".
Didn't get the job and I'm so embarrassed and just feel like I'm a fraud. How could I not know what full-stack is? And why did I put it in my resume? Fuck!
Anyway can anyone tell me what "full- stack *" is?
>inb4
>incoherent
>bad engrish
Just fuck my shit up fam5 -
When you are trying to write event handlers in JavaScript and nothing is working so you spend hours and hours trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with your js code only for it to be a duplicate id. Fuck sake. I really wish JavaScript warned you about duplicate ids, but then again that's what you get for using such a weakly typed language.
-
So I’m learning JavaScript but with every project I’m delayed because I have to make the page for the project and it irks me because I hate front end. DONT ASK WHY IM LEARNING FRONT END SHIT ALRIGHT? Anyhoo uh yeah no this shit is holding me back because I want to do web dev for web applications but developing the front end is such a fucking hassle. Like creating divs for the apps to look how I want while being basic as shit and I know JS is for front end and I get that and it’s fun to play with but I just wanna get to the programming you know? I’m not a designer I’m just trying to get better at programming and have fun. And also fuck those times I changed something and it literally should have changed but IT FUCKING DIDNT!2
-
Almost two decades of working with JavaScript, and I just got caught out by the most stupid of things..
Did you know that `["ping"] == "ping"` is `true`, whereas `["ping"] === "ping"` is `false`...? 🤔 I did, once upon a time, long ago. Apparently I forgot about it though.
Seriously, fuck you JS.. with all of the internet's 10 foot rusty barge poles.11 -
can't use IDE automated refactoring to extract method because we can't figure out the types of parameters and variables
fuck you typescript, javascript, graphql3 -
Man I really don’t like component libraries... perhaps there’s some thought out libs out there. But so far it’s been as if I were to build a bridge with a bunch of “reusable” parts but no one knows what the fuck they may be meant to do so no one bothered to account for anything and didn’t even fit screw holes or something.
So now I have to weld and screw everything together with fucking JavaScript in 10x the time it would have taken me to build the part myself.4 -
Fuck you Drupal 8
How complicated can it be to dynamically change the title of a page?
No I don't want to write another custom module, which requires two fucking .yml files?? and initiate another controller for something that simple...
Fuck it! JavaScript it is....3 -
While building this site I decide to check if it works in internet explorer (you know, would be kinda nice) only to find out that apparently even edge does not support the js notation:
class MyClass {
// Stuff here.
}
Throws an exception 'MyClass' is undefined... Fuck you ie. Making me rewrite my damn classes.2 -
Fuck PHP, what a piece of shit language, have to add a fucking $ to every fucking variable wether declared or not, half the fucking functionality of a language such as Javascript with a 1/4 of the features and sometimes these features don't even fucking work properly!!! Like fucking functions requiring to have a function, WHAT THE FUCK? Why does something like javascript .find() HAS TO BE SO FUCKING DIFFICULT!!! Seriously, for all of you who swear by PHP, do the world a favor and dig yourselves a grave and bury yourselves in it. Fucking down syndrome motherfuckers.33
-
Why in the hell does everyone have to have a different fucking CMS and why do they all make it so goddamn difficult to put a simple javascript in the head?
it's 2016 fuckers, sometimes the end user hires a dev to do things and I can't do shit in your fucking site-builder. I want to add a tiny javascript specifically for fb pixel, but frankly this is how most analytics work and it shouldn't be a complicated task for someone to perform if you built a halfway functional fucking CMS.
One simple function is all it would take to let users put a little bit of js in the head, fuck you could even name it something scary to keep idiots away or hide it behind a developers options in the settings or something that would allow someone with the IQ of a dolphin or higher to install some goddamn tracking code on the fucking shitstorm of a site your "builder" came up with.
your SEO practices suck too, but that's a rant for another time2 -
Algorithm Design Course Assignment: Sort a hexadecimal string using 4 different sorting algorithms, and display each pass on a webpage. Easy enough yeah? Oh wait. Boomer professor wants us to use a canvas based javascript library called P5.js
Why the fuck. would you enforce some random ass boomer ass javascript library on the class, rather than let students choose something they're more comfortable with so they can focus on the core of the project. IMPLEMENTING ALGORITHMS. OR AT LEAST PROVIDE BOILERPLATE CODE?? GAH!!!!!!!!15 -
Fuck javascript, been on this firestore cloud function since yesterday , i have been get some stupid errors like expected catch or return promise/catch or return , used some stackoverflow answers still not working. Uugggh really wished cloud firestore used a better language like python,..what more do u expect from a language created in 7 days..shitty js
-
I feel many people suffer from this same problem.
Meanwhile why the fuck would this not work in a javascript class or am I getting my languages mixed up ?
Will know soon enough.
6 -
Ugh, retrieving specific data fields nested within several arrays and objects in Javascript/Json jacks me up every fucking time!!!
Anyone ever fuck with the MapQuest geolocation/geoqueries api??
I'm trying to retrieve the lat/lng values out of responses generated from submitted address strings, and it's nested about 8 json layers deep.
I feel like I'm overthinking this?
I can access the values in my web console, and can reach them after using the console to assign them to a temp var, but can't get to the values from my actual js code. Only when I run some business logic from the console.
Here's a shitty example of me explaining the tree:
[{...}]
0:
locations: Array(3)
0:
latLng:
lat: <data here>
lng: <data here)1 -
Babel fails about 10% of the time, but if I re-run it it works. What the fuck did I even get myself into, and why aren't elements of a modern javascript toolchain completely deterministic? (webpack, babel, typescript, react)1
-
I'm too retarded to understand how the fuck to get iframes (of other pages on our site) somebody wrote in the past in our code base to not become the page (the original has 2 other pages on our site "embedded") https://cheatsheetseries.owasp.org/...
I don't even fucking understand if I implemented the recommended framekiller code correctly, but it fucks shit up like the not recommended framekiller code so I'll settle for it. I also enjoyed (actually I didn't) reading about how this javascript framekiller stuff is fucking stupid anyway and mainly only applicable for old legacy browsers (in which case go fuck yourself anyway, just use a modern browser which benefits with from the x-header-options whatever the fuck, which was easier to implement and juSt WeRKs)
Guess I have no choice but to write AJAX to do this dumbass shit.
It's a shame I have no fucking clue how to fuckign front end3 -
WTF?
W_T_F?
W-T-F?
W$T$F?
how the fuck do you brand codebases?
say you've got a brand called dicks,
and you've got a website, api server, some SDK's, and whatever else. How do you format the codebase names so it's A, usable as a variable name, B clickable at the variable part of the name, C, that's fucking it
dicks-website can't be used in js because
dicks-website = require('dicks-website') won't work
dicks_website can't be used in url's and in general because double clicking any part will select the whole word, so you can't replace dicks_X easily.
dicks$api seems to work, dicks and api are seperately clickable, and usable as a variable in javascript. I already know that the $ sign probably fucks up many many systems so that's probably a no go
has this question been addressed already?4 -
Fuck social media websites that don't allow you to embed their content with a simple iframe
Good example 👍 :
<iframe src="https://youtube.com/embed/..." allow="..." allowfullscreen></iframe>
Bad example 👎:
<blockquote class="reddit-card" ...><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/.../...">...</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js"></script>
NO I DON'T WANT TO RUN YOUR 100kb JAVASCRIPT FILE WITH FULL PERMISSIONS ON MY WEBSITE JUST TO DISPLAY 1 SENTENCE AND 1 IMAGE. WHO KNOWS WHAT OTHER NASTY THINGS IT MIGHT LOAD IN IN THE FUTURE.
With an iframe it's at least somewhat contained.5 -
Pocketbase relationships are a pain in the ass.
Don't get me wrong, the software itself is awesome and the maintainer is a cool guy.
But everytime I have to work with relations I have to choose between ripping my hair off or hardcoding categories as a string and use regexes "for old-times sake". -
So, I was googling for cross platform javascript things.. every answer, there's only weex and nativescript, but both aren't ready for prod, so I tried weex, it's alright but the documentation is non existant, and the support is practically on dial up, and hardly anyone has used it. And nativescript isn't really an option cause it's only for mobile.
So I chose weex, web + mobile, and I can easily port my already written vue project, sweet, so I get to porting, run into a few issues but it's pretty easy, need to play with some of the root file path definitions, no "./"'s just "@/" (if you use @ as your root symbol).
great. Pug works, sass... seems to work, then I run into a pretty big issue with sass compilation/loading, can't find an answer for an hour.
So I go out. Then come home, no answer on my SO question.
So I google "jsfiddle weex" to get a jsfiddle template for debugging weex/vue projects.
A few results down. I see this: https://reddit.com/r/javascript/...
well I've heard of framework7, but it would require me rewriting most of my element tags and components, but what's quasar?
I have a look, totally cross platform, desktop, web, mobile... wtf..
read the docs, "uses vue single file components"
..what, holy fuck, the documentation is beautiful, it uses vuex, fucking fuck.
I just found it 10 minutes ago....
wish me luck......... -
why the fuck JavaScript uses === and == ?! it's f***** the same! like iPhone 6 and 6s.. its just the screen!10
Top Tags
Weekly Rant
View