Prof: Okay guys, i need a flash drive to put a copy of your next project.

Me: *pulls out a flash drive and sho-..*

Prof: except you, I dont trust you.

My boss came into my room today, sat down and said:

Take your family to the [BIG AMUSEMENT PARK], and please keep the reciepts and give them to me. Spend a couple of hundreds bucks and we will pay.
Thanks for being someone whom I can trust

That made me happy

Few months ago I made an app for my buddy. Because it was simple soundboard app (it literally took me 15 minutes) I haven’t took any money. He said it’s for personal use only...

So he released it under his name on Google Play Store... And now he asks me to add advertisements... For free... When I asked him what can I get from it, he said “you can add your name to Credits”

That’s how you loose trust and buddies!

Last year, my company sent me to India to coordinate stuff.
Me, to my wife: "They've chosen me because they trust my social skills."
Her: "OMG, what is the rest of the company like?!"

LOL.. :-)

The ability to convince the compiler that there's no errors.

"Shhhhhh.. trust me, there's such things as a duoble. Now just tell me the build was successful"

Mobile app dev here 🙋‍♂️

Guy at work asking me why his phone feels heavier then mine (we have the same phones)

I just told him that his phone gets heavier with every apps he installs.

1 week later he meets me outside the office and tells me he deleted a lot of apps and his phone is actually lighter know.

Sometimes I just want to cry 😂😂😂

Got a great boss!!;

Me: Hey, do we have a corporate GitHub account?
Boss: *excitedly* do we need it? We'll get it!
Me: uhh, yeah, we need it 😉

Don't care he doesn't know what it is, got his trust to get all the right tools!

That’s how I can manage 10 projects as same time. Trust me.

Never trust a hot chick that tell you "Wow you are a programmer? Tell me about it"
ATTENTION: DON'T TELL HER ABOUT IT

Phone call...
Caller: we contact you to arrange an interview for Java developer position, what time is good with you?
Me: Sorry Sir, I am javascript developer not Java developer!
Caller: You mentioned in your CV that you are using Java and Ayax for building applications!
Me: Trust me Sir, I don't have any relationship with your Ayax...
Caller: No problem, we can discuss this small technical difference in the interview. When you are available for it?
Me: No Sir, I am not available.

trust me, it's done and tested!

So was first day at new job ... Boss takes me around meeting everyone. One employee stuck editing file by typing in new records data, calls boss for help.

Boss to me: "I like to get handsy with data from time to time. "
*me smiling, watch how he copies and paste the new records*
ME to boss:"why don't you just write the script to update all the records?"
Boss:"I don't trust the automation of input. "
Me:" what about human error?"
*crowd of other employees gather around awaiting answer*
Boss:"we include margin of errors in our disclaimer to the client... "
*He hears himself*
Boss:"... and we bill by the hour why would we work faster for less money?"

*me grinning, going to remember that line next time I need extension of deadline*

Me*murmurs*:" Master has presented dobby with a sock"
*Girl in next cubicle snickers clearly caught the reference "

Going to love it here.

Current PM in the morning: "Startup flexibility! I'm at the beach chilling in the sun! I trust you can do standup without me! #tech-detox #positive-energy"

Current PM in the afternoon: "ARE ALL THE FUCKING TASKS FUCKING DONE YET? THERE ARE ONLY 9 DAYS LEFT IN THE FUCKING SPRINT! WHY HAS NOTHING BEEN DEPLOYED YET?"

This is why I hate wireless earbuds: You don't have a wire available for strangling coworkers.

trust me i'm an engineer.

Why is it that every time I tell someone I code they instantly think I can hack into things like their phones. Then after that they never trust me with any electronic device.

Me: Hey can I use the toaster?

Them: No! Your just going to hack it.

Guy: I don't trust password managers
Me: so how do you remember passwords?
Guy: oh, I just keep them in a note in the iPhone notes app/iCloud.

I literally cringed today when my neighbor wanted help installing an app, she didn't tell me it was her banking app... And the thing I needed to help with was logging in... So she told me her bank details...

Even though I said (multiple times) it was dangerous to do so, and that she can't just trust people with this kind of information...

WHY ARE PEOPLE SO GOD DAMN STUPID WHEN IT COMES TO SECURITY!

Trust Me Devs,
In INDIA we use this to WASH DISHES in the Kitchen...

"Tabs create smaller file sizes. I run a compression company, trust me, I've devoted my life to minimalizing file sizes."

- Richard Hendricks

🙁

Every girlfriend I had broke up with me and it was not even my fault...

1. A bi cheating on her girlfriend - girlfriend found out
2. Furry cheating on her boyfriend - she felt bad...
3. Hysteric b** that did not trust me for even 1 second
4. Really nice and sweet girl... that could kill me if she did not take her antipsychotics - told me she is sorry but she wants someone older (I am older than her...) - her ex before me was 42....

To clarify: both 1 and 2 did not tell me they were cheating on someone with me... I only found out after the shit hit the fan.

I feel depressed... I just want to love someone and I want that someone to love me... that's it, I don't even want sex, I just want hugs, mutual trust and someone that I could tell anything on my mind without them judging me...

Appreciation post.

Fucking love Amazon even more now.

Story -
I created a new Aws account and they asked me to pay ₹2 (0.031$) as part of the verification process.

No big deal right?

2 days later, I got a notification saying - "Your account has been credited with ₹2.66"

Not only they returned me my money, but they also paid a certain interest with it too.

And the fact that they are taking care of their dev community (as if we are their customers) is appreciable.

Amazon - you bloody have my respect. I trust you.

No big deal

This fucktard of a 'stick that facility management up your arse' manager.

He insisted 'no cooling required. Trust me'.

While we insisted 'how dare you to asume our servers temperatures'!

We moved our servers to a new /tmp/office/ yesterday. Was quite fun, until we saw this...

Doorhandle is hot as fuck, 50 degrees air temperature, all servers in heat error state. Thank you, you damn fucktards! Take this cactus 🌵 and stick it up your arse!!

Can't work like that.

And they ask me why I have trust issues

Friend: dude, JavaScript seems awesome. It looks so easy and there aren't any annoying compiler errors like in Java

Me: I know it sounds cool in theory, but it sucks in practice, trust me

Friend: no way, dynamically typed languages are the future

*Friend installs node*
*Friend writes a simple script*
*Friend gets undefined errors because of a few typos and has a hard time debugging it*

Friend: JavaScript is retarded

-_-

Stop bitching about having to write comments, they are important whether you like it or not. Trust me nobodys code is "that good" 😒

Don't work late/during the weekend because someone else committed to an impossible deadline. Trust me. It's not worth it.

Me: So what you are doing in the IT field?
Him: I am hacking bank websites.
Me: OK, that's cool. It is good in free time. What is your actual job?
Him: I am seriously hacking the bank Web site!
Me: Trust me, if you seriously doing that you will never ever mentioned it...
Him: No, I am doing it legally... The bank hiring me to try to hack the website...
Me: OK, you mean that you are cyber security tester?
Him: That is almost the same...
Me: So you are tester?
Him: I am hacking bank's websites...
Me:....

Come on:
You can't trust estimates that two month ago me said!
He was young, foolish and full of hope.

Trust me, I've been doing this for years.

Best way to deal with numbers in JavaScript:

let x = "1"
x += "1" // add one
x.length // get value of number, 2

My girlfriend asked me to take her to somewhere she hasn't been when I asked, 'where do you wanna go for anniversary?'
So I took her to Github.com 🤣
Trust me, I had to pay a big price for that joke! 😏

Don't put a hack and leave comments like "// HACK: Remove this later". It's gonna stay there forever. Trust me. Do clean codes from the start!

Looking for jobs..
Position: Junior Java Developer
Requiements: Minimum 3 years experience with JEE, Applikations-Server, Persistenz, Open Source Frameworks, Web Services

Honey, trust me, if I had 3 years experience I wouldn't be applying to junior positions.

Job descriptions like this make me so MAD!

Me: I've been using ubuntu with i3 for 6 months. Is awesome. Everything works great.
Brain: Have you seen debian or arch linux. They're better than ubuntu. Just try' em
Me: Brain shut up. I don't have time to reinstall everything + I'll 100% fuck my pc up. I'll do it another time.
Brain: Trust me. I know what's better for you. Try it now
Me: No.
Brain: Pleeeeease.
Me: Ok fine.
Me: Now windows doesn't work, debian doesn't work. I need to format my hard drive and do this shit all over again.
Brain: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Hey. Install arch linux.

nephew: what's the meaning of word "Enterprise", particularly in computing context?

me: No worries about that. Once You endup in enterprise You will know

nephew: How do I know?

me: when bug in your software prevent at least 250 people from doing their job, congratz, You are in Enterprise! And You will know that instantaneously, trust me :)

What programming has taught me:
Never trust yourself, never trust your code...
And never believe that when it was working in the past, it would work again...

A teacher from high school.

I finish the assignment early, shit on everyone’s head in terms of speed and performances and this guy first praises me, then slams the keyboard with random chars, letters and weird shit in an application which was supposed to only accept numbers.

“But… the requirements said…”
“I’m your manager and I am dumb af. Trust me, this will happen a lot irl.”

Me and my trust debug åartner Rocky out on our lunch break. Working from home is great :-)

me : *leaving 15 min earlier*
manager : IT'S UNACCEPTABLE, HOW CAN WE BUILD A TRUST RELATIONSHIP LIKE THAT

manager one week later: yeah we need you to work till midnight if needed today. You cannot say no.
me : ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

post != rant;
post = "Feature Request";
@dfox

Stack Overflow is full of abuntch of downvoteing dickbuts. The devrant community is so much more accepting of new devs, why not add a question section.

Down votes would only be allowed for spammers.
One the question was solved, it would go into the devrant question archive, Searchable by everyone.

Ik you have heard this one before, but it's Just my two cents.

So today was the worst day of my whole (just started) career.

We have a huge client like 700k users. Two weeks ago we migrated all their services to our aws infrastructure. I basically did most of the work because I'm the most skilled in it (not sure anymore).

Today I discovered:
- Mail cron was configured the wrong way so 3000 emails where waiting to be sent.
- The elastic search service wasn't yet whitelisted so didn't work for two weeks.
- The cron which syncs data between production db en testing db only partly worked.

Just fucking end me. Makes me wonder what other things are broken. I still have a lot to learn... And I might have fucked their trust in me for a bit.

Trust me. I’m an Indian 😀

So my boss booked me a spot at a conference about "the future of online payments" and I received an email with auto created account (there was no sign up) with a clear text password.

I'm feeling pretty confident that I can trust them to guide and advise me on best practices when it comes to handling sensitive information.

Trust me, this is a kernel.

DON'T

EVER

SHARD

YOUR

DATABASE !

Trust me, don't !

Beware of office politics. Take it from me. Beware whom you trust in the workplace. Sometimes you won't detect it and they will prey on your innocence. You thought they're good but really is not. Back stabbers.

Today I learnt never trust a coworker or see them as a friend.

So I have been thinking of quitting my job to further educate myself. The work I sit with is mostly the tiniest CSS changes. Which is frustating and demotivating to work with.

One of my coworkers told me in confidentiality, that he was looking for another job in another company and he only told me. And wanted to keep it secret from everybody else. I felt this gesture of him trusting me meant I had to trust him back with something else. I told him that I am applying for an education for later this year. But I don't want to say anything before it has been approved.

He understood fairly well and we got to be a thing outside work.

Last week I learnt I was seriously underpaid compared to all other coworkers despite me being one of the people with the most responsibility. I felt this wasn't right, so I talked to the pay responsible and said this paygrade isnt substantial, and I felt it was demovating to go to work knowing I was the least paid coworker.

He understood fairly well he said and said he would bring it into management to discuss.

But then he said one last thing. "I have heard something about you applying for another education, is this true? Since I have seen you put your summer vacation really early this year"

I had to lie and say no, that was like before I knew I landed a job here.

I dont wanna say anything to my company before I get the approval from school.

But still now I am in this position of feeling stupid for trusting this coworker, mad that he violated my trust and feeling very guilty for having to lie to this person's face.

It's easy to multitask these two things.
"Being" a programmer and "being" single.
Trust me, there are no easier ones than these.

DATA COMMUNICATION BETWEEN SERVER AND AN APP..

1. Write all data into files,
2. Make the files as zip,
3. Send the zip to server,
4. Server will unzip the zip file,
5. Read all the data line by line from the files and update the data.

** TRUST ME, THIS IS A PRODUCTION APP I HAVE SEEN FROM A CLIENT **

Don't trust Evangelists when they say product X is easy 85% of the time

“Get the code working first, then worry about how to clean and optimize it.”

For me when I learnt about optimization and how one thing was better than something else, I tended to focus on that. I’d have a picture of that in my mind, and would try to write as clean of code with less hacks in the middle and as optimized as I could in the first go, which slowed me the way fuck down.

After he said that to me, I realized I was stupid and just wasting time if I worried about that from the start. Would waste time, and just cause more headaches from the start than it was worth.

——

Oh also another one, I knew never to trust the client from the start but the way he said it was funny. “Never ever trust the fucking client, don’t trust them with anything. I trust Satan more than I trust the client.” 😂

!rant
Anyone work at a place where you think you could leave $20 on your desk, go on vacation, and it would still be there?

Listen, I get you're a junior.

But please read the fucking spec I spent quite some time on writing for you before you ask me a bunch of irrelevant questions, which you know would be irrelevant IF YOU READ THE SPEC!

Trust me.

Read the spec.

It will be clear.

So I was interviewing at company X, through recruiter A. It all went well - one of the best feedbacks I have ever received actually, but then they went quiet for a bit... only to have the recruiter A call me about 3 days later and tell me that apparently the project they had planned to get me on, was a no go for a while and that they would contact me again within a month or so.

Meanwhile, recruiter B called me up and sent me to company Y and asked me what my situation was at other interviews. I said that I was interviewing at company X and that they came back to me and said the project is delayed and they'll contact me within a month or so.

Recruiter B starts a rant about how he hates when companies do that and that he, as a recruiter, would loose trust in that company if something like that happened.

And now company Y goes quiet for 2 days. Recruiter B calls me and says exactly the same thing.

So naturally, I say - "ah that's a shame, you must be loosing trust in company Y now."

He pauses and says - "Well umm"... another big pause. "I see what you mean, but umm..." another pause and this awkward silence.

"thanks", I said and I hung up. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

*based on a true story*

Co-worker: Let's release it
Me: Wait, I want to add just a little feature
Co-worker: Is it necessary?
Me: Trust me

*5 minutes later*

Co-worker: So, have you finished implementing your "little feature"?
Me: Yeah, well, it's done. Maybe.
Co-worker: What the hell have you done?
Me: MAYBE I've added 647 lines of codes to the file to implement my little feature, MAYBE it doesn't works and MAYBE the entire project is compromised
Co-worker: ah

You left me a tiny hole to look through, I can’t even PUT FUCKING AWAY that garbage and you expect me to trust you on design! Fuck you!

Trust me guys, waiting for the stress ball to arrive is worse than waiting for the stickers.

While working with an older programmer,
Me: "Hey Randall, get latest version, I made a checkin"
10 minutes later...
Me: "Hey Randall did my fix work for you?"
Randall: "I'm still going through TFS looking for NO's"
Look at his screen, he is manually going through the file structure, checking the version of each file
Me: "You know you can get latest version of the folder"
Randall: "You can't always trust that, I've had problems with it in the past"
Me: (insert hair pull emoji)

Reminder that you shouldn't trust head hunters.

I reached out to one a month or two back, because I knew they had worked with Company X in the past, and I figured they might get me a more direct line to HR.

They said company X wasn't hiring, that I should apply to Y and Z.

I started working at company X on Monday. They only wanted me to apply to Y and Z because those are the positions that recruiter was specifically trying to fill.

Recruiters are not your friend. They do not have your best interests at heart. They can be useful, but don't trust them.

Yes yes, trust me😎

A mate from highschool contacted me the other day, offering me a job on this grand new idea he had.

So I said: "Allright, lets hear it, whats the idea?"

Him: "Trust me, its the next billion dollar app! It is a whole new social network for..."

Coworker made a tool to automate part of our job and she sent it to me. After 5 seconds of using it I found a bug... she has been using it for weeks. Now I don't trust anything she has done around here. (It's a financial tool and the bug is changing certain numbers to negative so it subtracts instead of adds...)

Co-worker: dude, I need your help!
Me: all yours.
Co-worker: can't fix that sh$t over here.

[IDE]
Err on line~~
badFunction(...);

Me: piece of cake, gimme your keyboard.

[IDE]
Build successeful.

Co-worker: duuude, how did you...???
Me: Better not look.
Co-worker: but I am curious to know, ya know
Me: promise not to scream, k?
Co-worker: I just hope it's none of your old-stylish jokes.
Me: oh dude, you know me for years, trust me, it's fine.
Co-worker: -_-

- Team_leader_1: I know you're a frontend developer, but trust me NodeJS has threads :) sync operations don't block the main thread :)
- Team_leader_2: You need to study the theory :) NodeJs can handle further operations during the sync function :) it spawns a new thread, you haven't studied Javascript well enough :)
- Me, very ready to dab on 2 condescending little fucks:

Today at work I saw 2 tech guys (Russians) that tried to fix an audio system at my hospital clinic.

The PL-3.5 cable was unable to transfer any sound to the speakers from the secretary PC.

So they tried to plug it into one of their phones, to rule out the possibility that it is because of the PC headphones plug.

(The speaker volume currently is on *maximum* btw)

1st guy said "Let's play something nice and relaxing, so the patients (mostly old people) won't get an heart attack"
The 2nd ask "So what should I search in YouTube?"
Then the 1st said "Metallica"

I'm nearly crying today. 1 and half year ago I started my own business (gaming and android app dev company). Today I own an office and hired another person to help me. Why it took me 1,5 goddamn year to realize that working alone from my bedroom on 4-5 projects at the same time is not healthy nor productive in the long run? It seems that this shit took some self growth to realize that I can actually trust other human beings.

I hate being on call when all directors and c-suite are unable to work because their systems went down.

At least they trust me and let me work. It's just stressful.

Me: I want to be a dev..
Mom: But you only sit in front of the computer to play games.
Me: That's not what I always do.
Mom: Then why are you sitting behind the computer all the time.
Me: To make software. Most of the time you clearly see me typing code.
Mom: No, I can't trust you, you play too much games. Study hard and get another job.
Me: *Middle finger behind a back.*

So my CTO comes to me and asks me to checkout the APIs provided by a particular service and see if we can use them.

After two days of research I go to him and tell him that it cannot be done and it doesn’t fit our use case. He tells me research more although I have researched everything required.

So I take two days doing absolutely nothing, send a mail to the developer of the apis and they tell me that it can’t be done.

Now imagine this kind of scenario occurring every three months. RESEARCH MORE.

Why do super senior members of our company don’t trust me. It’s just so random and anger evoking

I've been working in a company for two tears, builsing it from ground up as a CTO with a CEO and COO. Two years in, with 60 people on board I was managing a project which was bringing serious profit into the company, and they decided to cut me off. Reason: they don't trust me anymore, real reason: CEO wanted more money for himself and less money control from me and the other guy.

Turned out fine as it made me start my own business.

When you see what worked for someone else with a similar issue on GitHub and run it.

Trust me, I hope I know what I'm doing too.

Hey! How do I do machine learning?

Well first you start off with a metric shit ton of data.
And then you .fit() your data
from there you can .predict() your data

Trust me, the algorithms are already there. All you need to do is get the data.

Why do people jump from c to python quickly. And all are about machine learning. Free days back my cousin asked me for books to learn python.
Trust me you have to learn c before python. People struggle going from python to c. But no ml, scripting,

And most importantly software engineering wtf?
Software engineering is how to run projects and it is compulsory to learn python and no mention of got it any other vcs, wtf?

What the hell is that type of college. Trust me I am no way saying python is weak, but for learning purpose the depth of language and concepts like pass by reference, memory leaks, pointers.

And learning algorithms, data structures, is more important than machine learning, trust me if you cannot model the data, get proper training data, testing data then you will get screewed up outputs. And then again every one who hype these kinds of stuff also think that ml with 100% accuracy is greater than 90% and overfit the data, test the model on training data. And mostly the will learn in college will be by hearting few formulas, that's it.

Learn a language (concepts in language) like then you will most languages are easy.

Cool cs programmer are born today😖

Vendor: We are very professional and follow best practices, we know what we are doing. You should trust us.

Also Vendor 5 mins later: DB passwords, API keys and SSH keys in repo. AWS Access Keys shared in screenshots in email.

Me: 😭

Asked client to send me the icon pack he wants for his website via email. He then sends me a screenshot of the icon's pack preview image via Skype.

Trust me, I tried very hard to explaining what he had to do. No success.

Trust me, you've been here before

This is why you don't want to have Dev gf. Unless you like emotional Rollercoasters. Trust me, had one...

2 leetcode hard questions in 60 mins. That's what I faced in few company interviews. Trust me, if that's the expectation you're having from candidate, you're looking for a leetcode monkey but not a software engineer!

To the interviewers who have such unrealistic expectations, please change your mindset. It's literally impossible to come up with optimal solutions to 2 leetcode hards in 60 mins if I haven't solved those problems before! It just becomes a memorization game not a problem solving round!!!

:)

Client: if you build me this one site super cheap I will give you another project because then I trust you

Me: interesting ...

The best comment I ever read in the production...

/*
* You may think you know what the following code does.
* But you dont. Trust me.
* Fiddle with it, and youll spend many a sleepless
* night cursing the moment you thought youd be clever
* enough to "optimize" the code below.
* Now close this file and go play with something else.
*/

Taking "Trust me bro" to a whole another level

!rant Scheduled Slack message from myself after hours to myself during work hours:

“Hey idiot,
The thing you need to do is [solution]. Trust me.
Sincerely,
Past you

PS: Drink some gd water.”

*followed by panicked double-checking I’d actually sent it to myself and not a coworker*

This one is interesting

- 9 to 5 (including breaks) aka WLB
- Building products in my area of passion (Music, Art, or Travel)
- High paying (I don't care for those perks like free food or bean bags)
- Enough vacations without judgement
- Continuous innovation (fuck your 1830s product)
- Good social capital (teams should trust me for my decisions)
- WFH where I can opt to go in to office whenever I want (so that I can build my awesome battle rig at home)

I'm the kind of dev who is willing to overtime because I enjoy coding. But my previous boss (owner) abused this opportunity and thinks he can call me whenever he wants. After my shift, he would be surprise if I go home immediately and ask If I will be working at home. He even called me while I'm in vacation (he wants me to work on a new feature). I already filed my leave 3mos before that. He is very manipulative to the other devs and doesn't even trust his managers.

Dear "Create a web API with ASP.NET Core" official MS tutorial:

you betrayed me. I came to you like an innocent child and you fucked me over, you abused my trust, forcing me to follow insane instructions leading to no result other than the loss of my childhood and my day.

I feel like a child raped by some perv-priest or monster father.

I had a soul ready for a space walk,
and now I have just a hole full of your cock

RANT.RANT.RANT.

So I have a fucking groupmate for our degree project and he's been constantly bugging on my neck asking me to do things. The problem with him is that he constantly reminds me of the things that I should be doing and he seems like he wants the thing to be done all himself. Basically, he doesn't trust me that I could deliver whatever he asks me to do. He keeps on micromanaging me from time to time and he seems like he wants to control my life altogether! Fuck this.

Oh and another, whenever he asks for opinion, whatever you say doesn't even fucking matter. He dismisses it immediately anyway and goes with whatever he thinks.

Seriously, fuck this!!! I can't keep calm and I need to constantly check on my posture! (Forgot the right term...) Uhhhh halp

Thnx @dfox for the awesome stickers, I'm gonna put them to good use, trust me))

My boss has been begging me migrate a nightmarish complex excel report he made to calculate the payout of a tiered rebates program with compounding rewards. Today I finally decided to make take the time and I sat down with him so he could break it down for me...

Me: *looking at the mess of formula's* it would be easier to rewrite the math than decode this - can you just give me the reward rules... where does that value in cellX come from?

Him:*pointing at the spreadsheet* There! All the rules are in there for you :-)... like it's some big favour...

Me:No I mean when you wrote this, what did you base this off? There must be something...

Him: *Very Gravely* No, no, no it's far to complex! It took me ages to get this sheet right and it balances so just trust me and use it ok?

At this point I will mention he's an accountant so yeah I fucking trust him... fast forward past 15 minutes of digging through what may as well be quantum theory and lo and fucking behold all 2 sheets and 100 calculations are mathematically fucking pointless. Aside from formulas like this:
$X10=+(((O10+P10)-((O10+P10)*$X$3))*$R$4)+T10
which is actually equal to (X10/R4)/L10.

Anyway once you compound and sum the "tiered" benefits the rewards payout is ALWAYS = customerSpend*1.81.

This is why programmers name variables.

You can trust me. I know SSL.

Predominantly a Microsoft Stack Dev, used Windows for the last 14 years.

Switched to linux mint for the last couple of weeks. Trust me its a breath of fresh air. Fast and smooth. True to its promises, minds its business.

Windows is nothing but a cranky, annoying, slow talking bitch!

I backup my home partition everyday at 9 pm.
Feels good.
You should also.
You don't want to remember this post when it's too late..

Today in development: discovered that it's possible via combination of keys to rename a database in SQL Server Management Studio without as much as a dialog box to confirm.

Shout out to the 2000ish users in production that discovered this delightful nugget of info with me.

Lessons learned:

A) Don't trust Microsoft to create software that makes you confirm potentially catastrophic actions

B) Make sure your user hasn't been granted ALTER DATABASE permissions without your knowledge before you start using it.

Well, I have a friend working on a major bank in my city. Yesterday we went for a coffee when he told me that the wifi connection that the costumers can use is the same as the network they work in. Like, are you fucking me? Do they know what security means? Jesus Wallace, wake up!
And they have a fucking "web security guy" working there. Doing what? Installing ccleaner on pcs? This shit gets me mad. And that's why I don't trust banks.

The biggest influence on my coding style is my OCD and trust me, its awful.

Trust me, I never got an answer on Stack OverFlow.

Trust me
Life's a lot easier if you can code a little :)
-Coder

Someone asked me to help him with his assignment and this happened.. trust me I'm not drunk
"mid ka next" means "next of mid"

Here's an advice to you guys:

Ever look at your mailbox and think it's so full of junk?

Archive all your current emails.

Then next time you get any spam emails take the time to unsubscribe or block the sender.

Trust me, life is so much better after you've got rid of those craps. And it's not that hard like it seems. In a week you'll probably get rid if 90% of those.

My girl friend was complaining that I care more about programming than her.
I told her,

"Trust me baby, in the array of my interests you are [1]."

She was satisfied.

dev: “I want to start working on [feature]”

Me: “I already started to work on it, sorry for not mentioning it, we need specs from design team before I can go on, but I’d suggest going for another task meanwhile”

Manager: “noooo design is very very busy, [dev] will take care of it.”

Me: “[dev] still needs specs from the design team... and I am half done with it so no real point in re-writing the same code I wrote”

Manager: “just trust me, we do this and [dev] takes care of it.”

*me and [dev] look at each other perplexed and just nod to the manager cause it’s Thursday and the fucks to give are over*

... am I actually a patient in an asylum? I question my sanity after this exchange of words.

Last year, my current manager promised me a significant salary increase if I transferred to his team. He said that's because his department has bigger budget. So I did.

Today I received a notification for a 5% salary increase. 😂

I am a dummy for trusting him. 🤡
There's a reason why a lot of my former colleagues are no longer in the company.

Never fully trust your company folks!

Boss: What's the estimate?
Dev: A month
---
Boss: What if we add one more engineer?
Dev: Two months
---
...
Boss: If we add a PM
Dev: Trust me. You don't wanna know

Im seriously thinking about Watercooling my Raspberry Pi 3...
Why?
BRCAUSE THIS LIL SHIT RUNS SO FUCKING HOT THAT I CAN MAKE AN EGG ON IT! THATS WHY!

Its 80°C when under little load BUT GOES OVER FUCKING 90°C ON LOAD! AND THIS IS FUCKING DANGEROUS! FUCK!

so back to watercooling...
Its a Stupid idea, I know, but its literally THE ONLY FUCKING WAY TO COOL THIS BASTARD! And trust me I tried Novec (Yes the liquid that evaporates at 60°C...) and SHITS EXPENSIVE!

I haven't got tape to prevent my dinner from opening, but hey... trust me, I'm (almost) engineer 😏

Trust me or not, i'm currently creating a fcking cool video game with php.

I was on a interview two weeks ago, got a mail today that I had been selected to the third round (government intel stuff)

I got clean sheet from the police and the "Security Service" in the country.

And now, in the mail. The recruiter wanted me to give contacts to my current boss. I am one of 4 and I dont want to sacrifice the trust that my boss have on me.

What the '''' should I do?

If you ++ this post, you will get good developer karma credits for the next 10 years, and every piece of code you write will eventually work.

Trust me this actually works, you can try it yourself.

CoWorker: “Yea then just use double inheritance to grab the methods off the two classes.”

Me: “Yea that doesn’t seem right... the first object is a string parser the second object predicts future occurrences...”

CoWorker: [louder] “No trust me, I’m taking a developer course right now. If you inherit both classes your new class can use all the needed methods!”

Me: “Okay, go for it bro.”

So tired of people who think they know what they’re doing...

#1 Don't go looking to clear your doubts with your mentor. Instead, try and figure everything on your own. Trust me, that'll teach you a lot more than you think rather than by getting the answers directly spoon-fed to you from your mentor.

#2 Always keep a curious mind if you want to achieve something in what you do. You can't learn anything if you don't have the curiosity to ask the right questions - why? (mostly). Especially if you're just starting your career.

Was very excited to receive my new work laptop. Everything is in French and I don't even have admin rights!
I guess they trust me with writing SW for their cars but when it comes to customising my own pc a team of IT guys should supervise me.

PM wrote a really high-level requirement doc and asked me about estimates.

Me: Well, functionality-wise it will take 4-5 days provided the design is ready.

PM: Our designers are really full on schedule; Just do it! Expand your creativity. I believe in your taste of UX

Me: Listen, the implemented design will take much more time to change if we go back and forth. It's better to revise on the designer's screen.

PM: Oh don't be so modest! I trust you already. Just focus on the functionality, get it done first. For the design we'll talk about it later. Move fast and break things!

Me: ..Sigh. This is gonna end up badly.

So we've got a gif that doesn't show up in our React Native application. Of course, the designers assume it's me: "are you sure the gif is in the codebase? how are you using it in your component"? yeah ok boomer. I'm like, look at this other gif, works fine. "oh" So I tell them, double check the export options on how you are building the gif, maybe there is something there. so now they are asking ME for those export options. I'M A DEV, NOT A DESIGNER, DO YOUR JOB AND FIGURE IT OUT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT PROGRAM YOU ARE USING

oh as an aside, I was putting up a website for a client and they are like "my logo is quite similar to many others, is this something to worry about legally?" OH, SO NOW I'M A LAWYER TOO??!!?!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE GOOGLE IS LITERALLY IN FRONT OF YOU

why do people continually think just because we can code we are fucking designers / lawyers / astronauts
/ god?
man this pisses me off - i think of that draw red lines with blue ink expert video, in the end, just smile and nod: "i can do... absolutely anything... trust me, I'm an expert"

*during sprint planning*
Me: so here are the tickets I'm taking in this sprint. I'll do this first and that second. I'm also keeping some buffer for emergency stuff
Manager: ok, this looks good. I trust you and will let you work in peace unless something important comes up. I won't micro manage you
Also my manager for every fucking day of the sprint: hey man what's up? Ready for sync up call?

THAT'S MICRO MANAGING RIGHT THERE YOU PIECE OF SHIT. YOU COULD CHECK JIRA OR GITHUB OR ASK ME IN STANDUP BUT YOU INSIST ON CALLING AND ASK ABOUT THE TINIEST DETAILS. GO FUCK YOURSELF SERIOUSLY

After being an active developer in the industry for about 5 years, I still have some bad dev habits on which I'm working on:
- Starting off with the code first without a proper design in mind/paper. (Trust me, I'll always regret of not having a proper design later)

- Writing long method bodies and not refactoring them later. (Because sometimes I turn out to be a lazy ass)

- Duplicating code in some places without reusing some.

Is anyone else get irritated while upgrading apps and seeing changelogs as:
1. minor improvements
2. performance boost
3. information not provided by the dev
4. repeating changelogs from the past few updates.

just tell me what minor improvement u fixed?
where performance is boost?
how can I trust if tomorrow you decide to add some malicious code.

I don't know but it really irritates me. Sometimes I don't even upgrade the app until they have something in the changelog.

Maybe because I am getting old now.

Don't trust me doing MOTDs

Brave Browser was found hardcoding referral links to partnered Crypto sites, even if you manually type the URL.

Since then , they have fixed the bug but it's hard to trust Brave again.

Privacy is built on trust. I have recommended Brave to my friends and family and seeing news like this , makes me skeptical about the company.

9:45 AM
I just woke up and in my whatsapp there was rhe following message of one of my friends:
"Hello how are you? I have to ask you a favor, ca you check if in my facebook profile is hooked up a hacker? A person told me that but I don't trust at all! Could you please check and let me know? Meanwhile I closed my profile, if I have to open it again let me know, thanks and greetings"
I think I return to sleep

So I did make a few website, they kinda worked well, but they really were ugly as fuck in terms of UI and UX.

So everytime a company was asking "have you got any website to show"

"NO, ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT, BUT YOU CAN TRUST ME I'M A REALLY GOOD DEVELOPER"

So I am only 15 and I am trying to find local businesses that will allow me to either build them a website or let me redo their current website.

Doesnt sound thay complicated right? I have gotten to do it once, for a laid back coffee shop owner whos business went out of business a day after i emailed him about it being done. I mean how the hell does that even happen!

I have tried different types of emails and shown all of my work, which it is all good sites that look professional. Issue is alot of people dont trust email offers or dont trust me cause im 15. I am not much of a person who can walk into a store and talk to the owner about it, i am not social in that aspect.

So anyone have any ideas?

Earphones on.

Notifications off.

A boss who is the most inefficient boss ever. No, yours is not, mine is, trust me.

In the middle of coding, never in the zone for obvious reasons. A workmate wants me to call him to discuss stuff as he is working from home, which I wish I were.
I keep coding and decide to call him later.

My boss interrupts me again to TELL ME IF I CAN CALL MY WORKMATE.
Whyyyyyy
FML.

What’s with all these people saying, “reach out to help for me anytime!” - but when you actually ask for help, they never respond? Like damn looks like I can’t trust ya cad ass anymore.

Realised I never post on devrant. Maybe I should. Todays tame rant

Never trust intune when it says a group policy has been successfully applied and had to use powershell instead. What is the point of you settings catalog if you lie to my face.

Gaslighting buggy Crap making me look bad.

Have you disabled autoplay yes on these devices.

Looks at fully synced device dafuq

Trust me guys for loop saves life.

I have an old manager that I worked with at an old job that got me shit canned for a failed web sockets implementation. He works at a new company and wants to talk.

What should I do?

A) I don’t trust this fucker. Ignore him.
B) Forgive and forget and try to get the job?
C) Something else.
D) SWAT the motherfucker.

Android is fucking fucked up.

Why the fuck it takes so much of time to build. And trust me,

React + Android is the worst combination. Can't even understand what the fuck it is trying to say?

And sometimes, no body knows what is wrong with something. Seriously look at the picture, that's the solution sent by the Android lead.

Did you realize the repeatedly at the end. 🦆 What try 🦆 dude.

Fuck. I'm ain't gonna work on this after this project.

I think some of my co-workers see me as real life human version of Google search engine.

Hope they would understand that just because I'm little bit more up to date in tech knowledge and an accidental Google nerd doesn't make me a know it all..

But i understand their tendency to trust my recommendation over their googling skills

They want me to find

1- best freelancing website
2- best platform or service for someone who wants to do online teaching

Results that I'm aware of:

1- freelancer, guru, upwork
2- YouTube, udemy, Pluralsight, skillshare, thinkific

Any other recommendations?

My company provides its services as web pages and web services to our customers.

Once a year we update the certificate used for the https connections.

I notified the update to the clients that use the web services.

One of them asked me a copy of the public key.

No problem. Open the web site with the browser, save the key and send by email.

One day later the client asked me the public key in a zip file because the anti virus blocked my attachment.

Why the client hates the Chain of Trust ?
He could obtain the public key by them self from the browser or openssl.

Trust me it worked on my machine .

“I do trust you, just let me see the logs”
- our colleague after we present to her good feedback from the demo just passed ok

When scrum master/agile coach sais "I know, I used to be a developer myself." ....

Do they think it makes me trust them and drop my point?

Honestly all I think is "well, plenty of bad devs out there, and there's a reason you'r not doing it anymore"

When you make a typo in a command and spend 20 minutes googling why it isn't working trust me its time to sleep and reboot.

Trust Google. Trust the Process.

The Android Studio Installer doesn't show download progress bars, speeds, ETAs or the size of files being downloaded. I hate this design. Tell me exactly what, why, and where is being downloaded so that I can download it myself with a better HTTP large file client, put it where you want it, and restart the installer. I know my machine and ISP and Google does not. I don't trust Google to make a single right decision, and I only want to relinquish control when I don't have time to do something myself.

My simple MySQL Connector for every languages (Dekstop/mobile). I've tried this in C#, VB.NET, and Java. Trust me, it works. How 'bout ya?

Just merge this pull request in production and all service gonna work fine, trust me :D

What is your greatest weakness?

My greatest weakness is that I don't trust people enough to let them know how the can leverage me by telling them my weaknesses.

Vue is amazing at all but fuck...never try to create some kind of layer on top of it or use external events inside. It is hell, trust me. I hate myself so much now. Shieet.
Now I am crying here with fucked up data flow and such complex hard to debug creature...

So I got everything done that I'm supposed to this month. Now usually I would try to get ahead of the rush. However, since now even upper management doesn't trust me to do my job I figure I will adopt the same development process as the rest of the group: do nothing for the first three weeks of the month and in the last week hastily make excuses for why nothing is done while doing just enough to justify my continued employment.

These days I'm listening to french music so much.
Even when coding. Trust me I am loving it and productivity really increased.

Forgot to bring me laptop to college, so had to use the age old Turbo C complier on college PC. So had to do some power calculation.. used the pow() function, forgot to include math.h...
And bamm!!! It compiled and I had no idea why the pow function isn't giving the correct value!!

Lesson learnt: never trust anything!!

If your problem is not in Stack Overflow, trust me, you are doing it "wrong"!.

Hey fellow devRanters,

I'm sure some of you have read about the newest vulnerabilities in Intels Management Engine (ME). I feel like ME and similar "features" are unacceptable backdoors into our systems. Unfortunately Intel and AMD do not offer their customers the option to acquire CPUs that lack these backdoors and make disabling them rather impossible 😒

Thus my question: Do you guys know of any 64-bit "open-source" CPU on the market that is production-ready and suitable for high-traffic web applications? Please note that I don't consider FPGAs to be viable options, since I don't trust Xilinx and Altera either.

best teacher? i wont really consider it teaching but it had really helped me a lot in my 1st year of programming.

me: *sends an email* hey i dont really understand how to do this part
teacher: i dont really know how to explain it so i coded it myself *sends me code*
me: oh thanks! *copy paste to mine*

after a week:
I GOT A PERFECT SCORE!! but ofc now i dont trust the teacher's code anymore. i deal with my own code.

I guess all of you know udemy.
Can anyone tell me whether HR actually gives any shit about "I finished an udemy class"-certificates?
I like udemy. To get into a new language or something like that it's pretty cool (if you are ok with paying for things you can find on google, too). But somehow i don't trust their certificates. Do they make you look like a fool if you put them in your cv? Or is it a prove of "see how engaged I am"?

The longer I work in my department, the more I grow to appreciate clients that actually know what they are doing. Or clients who have been communicating with us for so long that the emails got a little less strict and formal.

Having a client write something like "I know this mail looks scary long, but trust me, its just a few domain edits, nothing horrible" (freely-translated from my native language) just kinda... Sets me at ease and makes me chuckle.

Does anyone enjoy their Windows development laptop? I fight with it so much. I would be happy to smack it hard with a hammer for all of the embarrassing things it has done in front of customers.

They are trusting me to build a multi million dollar system yet for some reason I can't join a Skype meeting, or my mic doesn't work, or the scaling on screen makes everything look oversized.

What am I supposed to say? "Trust me to build your system. I swear I'm not as retarded as I appear."

I'm too young to have taken my last job...

Enough with the jokes. I have been networking with a lot of people through the years of working at companies and that paid off.

When people trust you for your knowledge, then it's normal to attract business offers. Also, you can partner up with people. That's how my last job started and is still going. At a previous company, I interviewed a guy who had the skills and motive to replace me, but he didn't get the job cause my boss was stupid (he was lucky not to work there, for real).

After I left, he called me to offer me a partnership. One year later and we are killing it, became good friends too.

Trust me this is not a coincident.... And only two people in the whole department know what this monster really did. Thank god i never had a professor like him.

After doing some self reflection today, I realized that I could finish college (I passed every exam), but the amount of time I spent for college (basically the whole day each day) is too much to handle for me.

Note to future me: If you blame yourself for why you didn't continue, it's because of the lack of time, freedom and calmness of your mind. Otherwise you would have went literally insane.

Trust me, your early version is in that phase right now, and I know it better than you do.

Just found out the reason for these extremely useless "Script error." errors we're getting being so useless is, once again, CORS. 😡

"Hey, something went wrong in an iframe. I'm not allowed to tell you what went wrong, or where, but trust me some shit is broken *somewhere*. But you have to figure it out yourself."

If cross-origin blocking were a person I'd kick him in the nuts just for being such a fucking dick all the time.

So manager talked to me about the plan to deploy me to another project. He told me I will be working on Gosu language. After me giving a sad face he said confidently "Trust me it is a good technology it is like java, python, c#(saying it as C-pound)...". He really knows his stuff, nothing to worry I'm in good hands.

Best strategy for getting unstuck:
Wildly curse at the screen and start smashing your had against the keyboard. The ideas will come. Trust me!

So there seems to be a lot of discussion lately about the closing of background apps on Android. Now, I expect a decent amount of disapproval from this, but I happen to be one of those people BECAUSE I've experienced that it drains my battery more to have them running.

Since I genuinely trust y'all quite a lot compared to how much one should trust the internet in general, I'd like some more proper and reliable info (or as reliable as it can get) on this. If I'm indeed wrong I want you to convince me.

I am a frontend dev but please don’t trust me 100% with responsive, works in every browser, animation heavy, top of the line, UIs.

Also I don’t know how to work with Wordpress.

Also don’t ask me questions about Webpack, Node, or anything related to builds/configs. (I will be happy to google search my answers for you tho)

But I am a frontend dev.

OK trust me, DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO. NOT. TRY TO DO ANYTHING ON A COMPUTER WHEN YOU HAVE SMALLER SIBLINGS, my baby brother has broken my PC monitor, my laptop screen, my phone, and hell, I'm desperate to the point of jailbreaking my Nintendo switch, witch he almost broke already, I'm typing this on my school laptop BTW.

Breakup and all hurts
But have you ever experienced you're working fucking hard on a project in your company for 3 weeks and suddenly they drop the idea for a new feature implementation ?

Trust me it feels so much fucking demotivated .
Idk what to say now

government is like an abusive spouse

WHERE DID YOU GO, WHAT DID YOU DO

ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME, YOU TERRORIST?! YOU'RE OUT TO GET ME AREN'T YOU

CLEMENTINE WILL REMEMBER THIS, *writes lists about innocuous things that may or may not actually happened*

Why are you helping your neighbours but not me =[ taxes pls
it is your wifely/husbandly DUTY to service me! it is immoral to do anything else
YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME! *proceeds to "educate", ignores any feedback and makes excuses to why they're not listening to you -- because it's not reaaaalllly technically ignoring you!*

DON'T TALK TO FOREIGN GOVERNMENTS, DON'T YOU KNOW THEY HATE YOU?! WE CAN ONLY TRUST EACH OTHER

proceeds to sleep with a foreign government on you

Debugging a task, that's sending emails to too many customers.
Supervisor: "Never mind, just test in production, there is a dry run flag for the tasks."
Just in case I test locally...
Flags tried:
--dryrun="TRUE" => Error, failed to send mail.
--dryrun=TRUE => Error, failed to send mail.
--dryrun="true" => Not trying to send mail.

If it's THIS PICKY a little more documentation would be nice.
And by a little more I mean: more than the task base class in a giant php monstrosity without phpdocs expecting its code to be self-documenting.

I hate it when I got severe sickness like fever that disable my focus and concentration, everything that i have planned to finish in a week is delayed, and any arrangements and meetings are postponed. It reduce me everything, productivity, income, client's trust, and it will eventually reduce my reputation.

That I'm responsible enough for people to just entrust shit to me and irresponsible enough to fuck up very important things for very stupid and easily avoidable reasons. Rarely enough to not happen a lot, but serious enough fuck-ups that it can't be considered inconsequential.

And when I tell people not to trust me with shit without supervision they refuse to believe me and think I'm just being self-deprecating. Bitch I'd accidentally let you die if that was a responsibility of mine, I have no brain, only butterflies.

Put on head phones for efficient coding.it helps a lot trust me

So I use 4 differents setups in my life nowadays

My main PC at my home, which is on Windows 7
My PC at work, which is on Windows 8.1
My Cloud PC for gaming and video editing, on Windows 10
My travelling PC, which is on Ubuntu.

The Ubuntu, it's okay, no problem. But trust me, that's a real pain in the ass to switch from one OS to another.

Trust me dude I can totally code but only alone and not with others around where no one can see me. Where no one can see me 🤥 Is there a Sunkist machine on the floor with my office? I'm the new senior developpah! Develll-opp-bah! Senyyyyawwww! Devel0PPA!🤪🙃

Fucking all of them.
I get stuck doing mind numbing bullshit without learning anything new or beneficial to my career.

It literally doesnt let me sleep at night.

I could become Senior in terms of years and still be Junior in terms of knowledge if I were to trust these fucking bosses who like to pretend to be mentors.

Udemy here I come.

Why do the issues that have been bugging me for weeks/months almost always go away immediately when the support person replies "I'm looking into this"? And almost always the support person claims he "didn't change anything".

How can I not think they are covering their asses and lying to my face? How am I supposed to trust support after this...?

they have no idea
and they don't trust me to help fix computer problems

36 or sth..
Trying to fix production for xy client without them noticing someone fucked up everything with the previous deploy.. (wasn't me)..
Anyhow, managed to deploy my changes plus fix for the previous fuckup.. in the morning it all worked as it should.
Why it took me so long? Because why bother writing down what changeset was used for deploy.. It's much more fun to guess.. Multiple times.. Anyhow, I managed to figure approximate code for that deploy & merge my changes & fix everything.. + later found out looooads of uncommited changes on the guys computer.. :/ So yeah, never trust a bunneh!!

so, in latest news (source: trust me bro)

Intel cut off 15K employees from their workforce. But but but, they re-introduced free tea.

Win-Win, right?

I love how all foreign people around this floating piece of shithole rock in the middle of nothingness always get flabbergasted when i tell them i earn $3.75 an hour as a software engineer with computer science degree. Trust me I'm flabbergasted beyond you

Garbage collector, toilet shit cleaner, waiter, barber, mcdonalds worker, all of them earn way more than me, as a software engineer with computer science degree

Don't you guys think, developers should narrate their own life in biography books ?

Trust me my neighbours will stop asking me to fix their broken PC

I know reviews are so I can show my progress and let you tell me what you think. Just, please don’t tell me to click irrelevant buttons, trust me, there’s really nothing there.

As this is as good a place as any to vent, I feel the need to proclaim that I've had to unsubscribe from /r/ProgrammerHumor on account of all the "volume control" jokes.
I am a patient man, but I simply cannot deal with monotony. It is the same fucking joke over and over again popping into my feeds.
Gonna give it a couple of months until it dies down.
Here on devrant, I guess I'll just have to downvote and trust in algo to save me

This is what a real yandere gf looks like. You _don’t_ want her in your life. Trust me.

One easy way to watch YouTube without ads on a smartphone is Firefox + Ad.blocker

HoWeVeR... Page loading time on YouTube went up to 1 minute for me lately, all out of a sudden. Nothing changed on my device. I have auto-updates disabled

A coincidence? 🤔 Or Google looking to make life hard for me. YouTube was already caught making loading slow on FireFox deliberately, so they deserve 0️⃣ trust

Sometimes I work from home, I don't know if i'm allowed to but nobody says nothing and I don't notify either, my record is 1 week without showing up at the office, I want to stay one month just to see what happens.

Do you think they trust me or I'm unnoticed and replaceable?

Hello guys any can tell me about good trust site for earn money . Beacuse i lost my job due this Covide19

I just used Redux with NodeJS. Trust me it's awesome..👩‍💻

I really don't want to dual boot windows and ubuntu, trust me,
but when I'm getting frame drops in chromium, while having a gtx1070ti, it's kinda hard to be a linux/ubuntu advocate and windows hater when every stackoverflow answer tells you to reinstall drivers
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

Xamarin.Forms sucks ass. Piece of garbage. If you wanna make a big project better not choose Xamarin.Form, trust me.

I don't trust that my code isn't cheating on me

It is better to write almost all of the logic used in the code as comments/documentation.
Trust me.
It is a good thing. It increases Code readability.
Nobody is going to copy your logic and get hired in a high paying job or get promoted for that reason. People will come to know about your wit and will appreciate you instead.

Reading about technologies I know on IDG owned news sites make me cringe and yet I trust them for news on technologies I don't know.

Trust me, I'm an engineer

Switching keyboard buttons '/' with ';' is not that big problem but it's really annoying, trust me!