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Search - "you don't say"
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🤔 If developers were linguists...
Person 1: How do you say "????" in Italian?
Person 2: Why don't you use Japanese? It's a much better language.6 -
If you're going to ask for my help
... and then do the opposite of everything i say
... and then complain when things don't work
... and continue to ignore everything i say
HOW ABOUT YOU JUST FUCK OFFundefined fucking hell fucking fuck fuck try listening for a change and see how that works for you? maybe just once?8 -
wife: why don't you react to things I say (she means why don't I go crazy when she says crazy shit)
me in my head: after 7 years in IT I have learned not to react when people above you say crazy shit.2 -
What the fuck!? Did you just fucking say you don't want to discuss API endpoints with me because I'm just a frontend developer? Get the fuck down from your imaginary backend throne and talk to me like the software engineer that I am. That's right, I'm a software engineer too, you fucking asshole. Just because you do backend and I do frontend doesn't mean you can talk down to me. And I swear that the next time you say you made all the work and I just have to "style it" I'll just leave. You can "style it" yourself.34
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"I don't use Linux because you can't game on Linux"
Shut your fucking cocksucking mouth.
Yes, support isn't the greatest and a lot of games don't work on Linux yet and some graphical drivers don't work.
But don't fucking say you can't game on Linux because you fucking can.
Steam has a Linux game library that keeps on growing and growing.
There are some platforms for games especially for Linux as well even.
I've seen steam games with freaking high requirements run with any lag on Linux computers - open source amd drivers worked well.
The support could be much better (of games/drivers) but YOU CAN FUCKING GAME ON LINUX.
THAT YOUR GAME DOESN'T RUN ON LINUX DOES NOT MEAN THAT NO SINGLE GAME DOES.
MOTHERFUCKER115 -
- It's a game, play it
- Come prepared
- It's better to say "not sure" or "don't know" than bullshit
- Don't write in the CV (or mention during the interview) things you don't want to be asked about
- Sound eager and enthusiastic about your profession because no one likes a downer
- the interview is a sales meeting, you are the goods, be sure to be a good salesman10 -
relationship with dev perks (just happened):
GF : *bad mood* i'm hungry
Me : Let's go get some food ! *trying to cheer her up*
GF : No.
Me : Ok, whatever you say.
GF : Do you really wa--
Me : Whaat? you said "No"?
GF : Don't you see abstraction in my face?
Me : so what ? you want me to Implement it?
GF : NO. PUT IT IN YOUR GODDAMN MAIN FUNCTION.
Me : ok let's go *still don't understand what she meant*
GF : Good Job.68 -
Wife: the neighbors brought their pc, it doesn't work.
Me: WTF did I say to you. I DON'T REPAIR ANYTHING NO PCS, PRINTERS, WASHMACHINES NOTHING TELL THEM TO GET THE FUCKING PC GODDAMIT ITS MY FREE DAY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.3 -
"You will get a month to finish this project."
"I will be honest and give you are a realistic deadline. It will take about 2 months."
"But ${random} company told me they will take one month."
"As you can see from your previous project, they will say one month and will drag it to two-three months by making excuses"
"No, I don't think you are good enough for it. I will pass it to them."
"..."6 -
Boss: please refactor this js 2k lines spaghetti code class and use it in our reactive functional app
Me: it will take like 1 week to refactor and plug this
Boss: but it's almost the time I needed to write it!
YOU DON'T SAY? MAYBE FIRST LEARN HOW TO WRITE DECENT CODE. ffs.2 -
Someone donated to me today for one of my open source projects.
I don't even know what to say. Thank you 🙏3 -
Recipe of cold coffee.
Step 1: Make Coffee
Step 2: Start Coding
Step 3: Forget you made Coffee
Step 4: Drink it Cold
Don't say thank you I understand!33 -
Now there was this meeting where our boss called our team to reach at exactly 8:00 . One minute more and you will be fired.
Turns out he himself reached at 8:15 for the meet. And we were just staring him, wanting to say, "Hey boss, you don't need to come anymore. YOU ARE FIRED."9 -
If the Firefox Quantum is really good then you don't need to say:
"Chrome will become obsolete"
"I hope Chrome dies"
"Chrome's dead, long live Firefox"
to prove that it's a great browser. Fanboys always ruins nice experiences.14 -
It looks like those who say "I don't use Chrome, I use Firefox" or "I use duckduckgo instead of Google" are like vegans.
No one gives a flying fuck if you're a vegan or you use Firefox.
Yes, many of us use Firefox, ddg, Altavista, Netscape and FreeBSD but there is no need to remind us at every opportunity you do so.
Do whatever you want to but we don't care and probably won't judge you.40 -
PM: Hey Brod, I know your really busy refactoring to ES6 but I think our Ruby app broke, could you fix it?..
Me: Ask Tom, he's the only one here who knows ruby he wrote the app..
PM: I didn't want to interrupt his Skype call.
Me: he's not on Skype, that's his face, he's taking snapchats.
PM: oh, well I don't want to really interrupt that either.
SAY YOU HATE ME. JUST SAY IT.8 -
Put it on a poster:
"It's ok to:
say "I don't know"
ask for more clarity
stay at home when you feel ill
say you don't understand
ask what acronyms stand for
ask why, and why not
forget things
introduce yourself
depend on the team
ask for help
not know everything
have quiet days
have loud days,
to talk,
joke and laugh
put your headphones on
say "No" when you're too busy
make mistakes
sing
sigh
not check your email out of hours
not check your email constantly during hours
just Slack it
walk over and ask someone face-to-face
go somewhere else to concentrate
offer feedback on other people's work
challenge things you're not comfortable with
say yes when anyone does a coffee run
prefer tea
snack
have a messy desk
have a tidy desk
work how you like to work
ask the management to fix it
have off-days
have days off
(From UK Government Digital Service: https://gds.blog.gov.uk/2016/05/...)7 -
⚪Present yourself properly
⚪Have a basic idea about the company and the role you're applying for
⚪Be respectful and pleasant to everyone when you go to an interview
⚪Day before the interview, go over the interview in your head and prepare as much as you can ( this way you'll be more comfortable in the actual interview )
⚪Figure out and prepare your "Strength and weakness" answers
⚪Don't lie on your resume or in the interviews, if you don't know something, simply say "I'm sorry i don't have experience with that”
⚪Being nervous is ok, but try to relax and answer the questions correctly and clearly
⚪Don't give up and join something that's not worth investing your time5 -
Rant! I found a bug in payment provider's api. The bug involves sending an invalid (!) Stripe ID to that API, (which I send on purpose btw) Which causes a complete white page when you login to their systems and view the details of that customer. Btw the API will accept that invalid Stripe ID without questioning and returns a 200 status code back.
So I send a mail to there support saying "look I found this bug by accident, this is how you can reproduce it"
And the support team send me a message back saying "then don't send an invalid Stripe ID"...
You don't freaking say... *sigh*9 -
Alright, I just wanna start off by saying that I'm a huge privacy guy. I hate all kinds of data collection companies like Google/Facebook/Amazon and all that. Yet I'm forced to have a Google account for certain reasons.
But the thing that I want to say is that I often talk to people to express my concerns about privacy. And most people agree and say that "yeah sure that's some scary shit" but don't actually do much about it.
And the thing is. If you just browse through all of the options in your Google account. You can turn off and remove almost all data collection/ad serving and identification options entirely.
And yet purple complain about that Google sees what you buy and shit. Turn everything off. Get and adblocker and get noscript. The single best browser add-on out there. It's almost that easy to get at least acceptable amounts of Internet privacy.
Please, don't ever ignore the significance of in Internet privacy. And the potential issue of net neutrality. Don't be ignorant. Don't be the client.24 -
Dear Android:
I know I'm not on wifi. I get it. Sometimes data coverage isn't amazing or the network is congested. It's cool. You can just flash "no service" and I just won't try. or even "3G" and I'll have some patience. I rember how slow 3G was. It's okay, I'll wait.
But fucking stop showing 4G LTE if you can't make a fucking GET request for a 2kb text file in less than 5 minutes! Fucking really? Don't fucking lie to me with your false hope bullshit, just tell me the truth and I'll probably sigh and say shit and put my phone away.
But fuck you and your progress bar externally stuck in the middle. As if to say you're making progress! Wasting my time!
If you can't download a kilobyte in a 5min period, why even say I have data at all? What good does that do me?23 -
$sis: hey $me, can you help me?
$me: Uhm, sure, what's wrong?
$sis. The printer doesn't work..
$me: what does it say?
$sis: what do you mean?
$me: like, when you try to print something, what does it say?
$sis: uhm... idk...where should it say something
$me: On your screen you should be getting an error message right?
$sis (now getting irritated for some reason): no it doesn't..
$me: okay, let me check it out
*I walk to the printer with my sister's laptop and plug in the usb*
*Select printer > click print*
"Printer offline"
$me: was it also saying this before
$sis: uhm...yes
$me: ok
At this point im already getting a bit fed up
$me: are you sure this port is working
$sis: yes, I am sure
Okay, check other ports just to be sure, also don't work.
After about 15 minutes of debugging, turns out she managed to unplug the cable on the printer...
And all I got was a "o thanks"
Fml4 -
Best error message I've found during my dev years.
"Error: An error has occurred!"
You don't say! :))8 -
In IT-Class:
Random: Ey watcha doin?
Me: Programming. What else?
Random: Oh, you're such a nerd...
Me: Programming is fun! I really like it.
Random: Please don't say this is your hobby...
Me: It is.
Random: Bruuh... *goes away*
Why the fuck are you here, if you're not interested in programming???
I don't understand such people.13 -
Being a programmer on a non-tech startup company is not too bad. That means aside from coding:
- You have to check if the office printer works
- You need to figure out why the phone lines aren't ringing
- You have to teach a stupid colleague on how to unzip a file
- When they give you a task, they'll say that it's "not urgent", but, they just "need it by tomorrow"
- You have to be a "mind-reader" because if something goes wrong, they don't know how to describe what's going on. Or probably, they're just too lazy being specific. They'll just say, "Hey, I have a problem.", and you will be like "What problem? Your dog is sick? You shit your pants? You lost your faith in God? Fuck what?"
- You don't have a time to "focus", because everyone interrupts you for just about anything related to "technology". Yeah, because you're the IT guy
- You always have learned and applied the latest practices/stacks, but no one gives a fuck
- You will start to re-think your life and devrants make you feel better9 -
I just wanted to share a quote that I think is completely magnificent.
"Saying that you don't care about privacy because you have nothing to hide is like saying you don't care about free speech because you have nothing to say."
- Edward Snowden26 -
Dad: What are you doing with your life?
Me: Enjoying it. Can you say the same?
My dad degrades me for my programming because he's from 'that generation.' Fuck him, Imma do what I enjoy, cause I'm damn well sure I don't want to end up like him.13 -
"I put in a request last week, why isn't this done yet?! It's an emergency!"
Look up number... Created early 2015. Need by date, late 2019.
Mothertrucker, get yo shit straight. I've been on the phone since 7, I don't have time for these games. How does 2.5 years pass and you say it's been a week?!
....and there goes my phone again1 -
I just wanted to shout out to everyone here and say that I really appreciate how great everyone here really is. I've posted rants in the past on dev subreddits and I've always received harassment for one reason or another. In my whole time here, I don't remember running into anyone who was nearly as verbally abusive as those on Reddit. Thank you all for being you and please continue to do so.3
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So some guy decided to steal my laptop. I don't know if they thought my machine wasn't happy with me or what but whoever did that, all I can say is your time is coming motherfucker.
I will always miss you 😭😭13 -
If you get the "What's your greatest weakness" question make sure to answer "honesty". That way when they say "I don't think honesty is a weakness", you say, "I don't care what you think."1
-
README.md file on some random GitHub repository
"A Python program written in Python which does xyz task"
Ok you don't say2 -
Tester - The app has a bug when I try to buy a ticket
Me - okay, what's the bug ?
Tester - it shows an error
Me (trying to not high-five him with a chair in the face) - What's the error message?
Tester - ah nvm it works now!!
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Explain the issue you dimwit, don't just say it doesn't fucking work!2 -
I recently got my first job ever as a developer. And I don't know how long the feeling will last; but I have to say it's an awesome feeling to get paid for what you love doing! I hope you guys share this feeling with me12
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*offering sweets to a fellow at work
Colleague: Oh I'm a diabetic but What you've got here aaaaaa.....
My Brain:
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Me: Oh come-on already One small piece won't kill you9 -
Today is a great day for me! Today I've reached my weight goal - 99.9 . That's right guys - this nerd can proudly say that he's lost 20kg since last Nov!
Boi does that feel amazing.
So yeah guys, listen up. If your weight is <100 - appreciate that! Your hearts aren't in trouble, you can bend easily to put your socks on, you can sit with your legs crossed, you can do sooo many things! Enjoy it. And don't let it go easily. Don't think like I did: "meeh, it's just one more kilo -- I'll tackle it down later". It's a // TODO. It'll never happen!12 -
Me: I think you should keep your data in a proper database.
Client : Don't try to up sell your products to me. Excel works just fine! Been keeping data in it for years! Wonder why you ever need a database to begin with.
What would you say? Cause I'm speechless.6 -
He: Honzo, you are great coder, but can you please stop using those sexy anime chicks as placeholder images in your templates?
I: Ups, i forgot replace them.
He: Don't worry, client also enjoy it, but he maybe is only one. He also want to know where you found them.
I: Konachan.com
What can i say, i have exciting work.22 -
At work, me and my guys don't say "you have my attention" we say "you have my erection"
Yeah, its juvenile, and in poor taste, but to us its fricking hilarious.
Anyway, at any meeting when someone says "attention please" we always start giggling like fucking morons.
We basically substituted the word "attention" for "erection" and the only thing that we fear is using it in public. My guys seldom have to speak in public, I do most of the talking as their manager.
It falls on me to not say it at the wrong place, and the wrong time.
That is not reassuring to me. But I wonder how much longer can I keep going without messing that one up.15 -
A real conversation I just had:
Brother: Have you heard of a game called Super Hot?
Me: Everyone has heard of that game.
Brother: Can you play it?
Me: I don't have the PC to run it.
Brother: I played it on my friend's Xbox.
Me: I don't have an Xbox.
*Pause for effect*
Brother: Can you build one?
(He's not stupid. He just likes to say things that will annoy me. We live in the same household, he would know if I have a PC or an Xbox.)12 -
While working, my dad would come and stand behind me. Looking at the indentation, he would sarcastically say things like "Don't you know how to write?" or "Why are you writing so ziggy zaggy? " or "All these years of education, for what?"
The first two or three times I really had a good laugh. But after that, I really get pissed off.1 -
Non-developers (especially factory workers) don't understand the stress a developer goes through. They say: "What stress could you possibly have? You just sit with your ass behind a computer".
Yeah.. don't get me started.15 -
I wrote this blog post entirely on my phone through doing an SSH on my home server. Why, you ask, well because I don't have my laptop and I am hella bored. Stupid, you say, well I agree.
http://iostreamer.me/chip/2016/...7 -
You Don't post an "X vs Y" article and conclude with "it depends, there is no winner"
We understand it your opinion so just say it, break hearts if you have to. But don't build tension and then leave the audience hanging.
Ps. This is especially for react vs angular vs vue11 -
Week 26 advice - you all probably know this but good to refresh!
Eat healthily
Sleep well
Document clearly
Annotate your code
Use version control properly
Keep yourself in check with project management tools
Your peers are your friends... And competition.
As much as your boss is an idiot respect them and your life will be easier.
With great power comes great responsibility; don't touch that keyboard until you think through what you are doing chances are your first idea is not the best.
Don't write quick fixes and say you will go back to clean it up later on when you have time. That time will never come.3 -
Generally I don't discuss work with family as they just smile and nod.
I start by saying I'm a front end web developer, then simplify to I code websites, then I have to simplify again to say I make the bit you look at.
So now I just say I'm in IT.1 -
Keep your arrogance, your fucking stupid logic and religious belief about everthing you say is right aside.
when somebody says there is a better way to solve a problem.. you can do two things. you either listen to them, validate the idea and accept or reject based on discussion or you just be an arrogant fucking prick and stick to your fucking reasoning, about your "right" way.
Don't do the latter. Wont help you become better neither at work nor in life.
FUCK YOU.
- a teammate7 -
How can those WordPress-Theme-Creator-Bitches write bullshit like "no coding skills required". What the fuck do you say?
Why don't you jump into the Pacific Ocean (no swimming skills required), idiot.3 -
Hello "friend", whom I haven't seen or talked to in years. How have you been? Please don't mind me, my life is boring as shit and nothing happened to me since. Yes, I'd gladly make an app for your company because you agreed to do it but apparently you lack the skills. Oh, you've been fucking around for a month doing nothing? That's sad but sure, I can do it by Sunday, I don't have plans for the weekend anyway. You say you can't pay me more than what I earn in six hours doing my day job? And your boss should think you did it all by yourself? Well, let me consider this cool little opportunity. I'll be in touch, talk to you "soon"!1
-
Do Travis CI's email subjects really need to say "Still failing". As if I don't feel bad enough.
Fuck you Travis i'm trying!!!1 -
In acting you don't say "good luck" but instead "break a leg". If coders were superstitious, what would our equivalent be?21
-
That moment when you wanted to see Big Ben since you were 8 and it's under renovations. 🤬😭
Man you guys don't pay as good as America but I'm seriously ready to say fuck it and try it out here for a few years.4 -
I honestly don't get too mad when people aks me to do things like install programs for them. This is not my dayjob, but when you think of it, they're right when they say "you are a programmer so you must know how to do that". We do know how to do that. When you have a question about plants and you know a farmer, you are going to ask the farmer, even though he is not a gardener. He will know. Just as we know how to use computers very well.2
-
I've been coding for over 8 years, and whenever a recruiter says we have you do these coding challenges or recite them an algorithm from memory, I say "You know, the longer you've been programming, the less you remember how to do this stuff, because you don't use it in real life." They say, "Well we just want to see how you think and how you solve problems." B.S.
These types of algorithmic programming challenges besides the simpler ones don't show how you think. A lot of stuff like the dynamic programming and other optimization problems were solved by phd professors after many years of research. Nobody would think up these solutions on their own.
These programming challenges weed out
experienced developers unless they want to
take the time to re-learn this stuff. It explains why google, facebook or amazon are filled with young and inexperienced developers and how come it takes so many thousands of them to get anything done, and they still have buggy products...23 -
What the hell is "4k mAh battery"? Come on guys, you know what that little 'm' means, please tell me you do.
You wouldn't say "4k miligrams". You wouldn't say "4k milliseconds". You wouldn't say "4k milliliters". So don't use "4k miliampere hours". It's dumb.
Just to be sure - everyone, repeat with me:
👏 0.000004 👏 MAh 👏 eqals
👏 0.004👏 kAh 👏 eqals
👏 4 👏 Ah 👏 eqals
👏 4000 👏 mAh 👏 eqals
👏 4000000 👏 nAh 👏
Thank for giving me 5k ms of your attention.20 -
John: You know, I don't appreciate it when I run the application and it crashes on me. Especially when you say it's working. If you say you've debugged it and got it working, I shouldn't be able to break it in the first 2 minutes.
--------------------------
me: You know John, with all due respect, there are two ways that this can go. Either we can actually work on this project as a team and get something done, or I can leave and have you flounder on your own trying to complete the rest of this project for the next 4 months. Now, I know that you don't have a lot of experience in this framework, so that means you owe me the respect I deserve and not complain about the way things are getting done.
--------------------------
Me: Ok, John, I'll fix it.1 -
It's hard to earn reputation here if you don't say anything.
I'm more of a lurker and I hardly have anything worth posting.13 -
Well, I guess all the Linux folks are going to know what I am talking about. Do you know this feeling (Yes, you know. Don't tell me anything.) when you use Linux and nobody else uses Linux in your Work/School. And these people come to you and say.
Stupid people : Oh! You use Linux. That's bullshit!
Me : No it's not. It doesn't do 24/7 updates like Windows.
Stupid people : No, Linux is bullshit you don't have money for Windows. And Linux can't run professional Applications.
Unfortunately there is no medicine that cures dumbness. Just saying ...
I'd rather stay not dumb like these people instead of buying another Windows license.24 -
My little daughter came to me all excited, saying "Daddy! Daddy! Guess how old I'll be in June!"
"Oh I don't know princess, why don't you tell me?" I said. She gave me a huge smile and held up four fingers.
It's now three hours later, police have joined in and she still won't say where she got them.7 -
I hate cliched lines in office.
When someone I respect leaves the company I don't say "Good luck for your future. Keep in touch". I shake hands, look them in the eye and say "It's been an honor"
On a birthday I don't say "Happy Birthday". I say "May you grace the cover of Time magazine" or something else related to their aspirations.3 -
!rant
Breaking point in System Architecture. The point where you define it is ok for the system to break if you user doesn't meets the expected threshold of intellect.
In plain words, you say "F**K it, if someone is that stupid, let the system go down"
They don't teach this in college.9 -
!Dev
WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO MEET STUPID RELATIVES.
I HAVE NOT MET THEM FROM PAST 5 YEARS AND NOW MY PARENTS ARE FORCING ME TO MEET THEM SAYING THAT YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO MEET THEM FOR QUITE A LONG WHILE (BECAUSE I AM SHIFTING 5000 KM FOR JOB).
NO, I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THEM AND WON'T TRAVEL FOR 6 HRS JUST FOR THEM TO SAY YOU ARE SHY. NO I AIN'T SHY YOU ARE AN IDIOT.14 -
That moment you're 8 beers deep into your program at 4am, so focused and then realized you've been crossing your legs doing the pee pee dance in your chair so you don't piss yourself because your bladder is full and you just say "ok bathroom break after I finish this method, then one more beer."4
-
I'd tend to say Matlab :
- you don't learn to write good code
- if you start by learning Matlab, you tend to be stuck in Matlab
- it's heavy and ugly and expensive
- arrays start at 18 -
Devs are known to give up quickly especially beginners...all I can say to them is..
...there is nothing like smooth mountains, you have to go through the ragged edges and valley's to get to the top...
Don't stop Coding... and dont give up.1 -
"It is risky to release an app that depends on APIs that you don't control."
Yeah, dude, we also live in the real world.
Better to say: "Your app should handle cases where the third party API is partially or even totally down."
God, some people, they build a wall of rules around themselves and wonder why their skills don't improve.13 -
recently people have been worried about what people were going to say I.e "no hate" , don't hold back!
In devrant we only mean light hearted banter if we are pissed we don't want to hurt you we are pissed at a thing and not directly at you. Not that I speak for dfox or trogus but I'm sure that's what they are going for, and it's what ive seen!
We are nice here... This isn't YouTube , it's a credit to devs we are nice people. Hell it isn't stack overflow!
Also I'm brutally honest at times but I love you really.10 -
Cs101 - a 3 hour Friday morning lecture. 1st at uni doing computer science. Half asleep. I'm awoken by the professor
"You at the back - what's the answer!"
Alarmed but not too bothered I just say "I don't know"
He replies "yes you do! We just went over it"
I say I really don't know. Someone behind me says "64". So I say "64".
Professor sighs and says "no - 2 to the power 8 is 256!"
He never liked me after that.4 -
Project Owner: We don't need Git, it's a waste of time to set it up!
Yeah, whatever you say old man...7 -
Don't you love it when you take a look at a company frontend React code and GraphQL queries and they say you are hacking them? 🤔🤦🏻♂🤣12
-
How to teach a 5 yr child to code?
The method is simple you don't need to teach him to code just help him to understand the method to execute a task. It took me years to understand that coding is a way to express what you want to say- the method and also is our expression. So, if you can help him/her to understand what to express, then I believe the method on how to express is totally unworthy. He/she can say printf("I know this") or print("I know this") or #I know this or he/she may create a new language.
Which you might call: The Baby's Code in future
If you like it do ++7 -
I would love to see those that say:
Unused RAM is wasted RAM
There you go, used every fucking possible bit to a point mouse pointer doesn't fucking move.
Fucking hate when people say that, and don't be funny and throw a comment about those 300MB are wasted .. blah blah blah.... Yaaaa fuck off.24 -
Him: "I don't need source control, it's just another program that does unknown things on my source files. What if one day it stops working?? How do I get my files??"
Me: "you could say the same thing on 90% of the tools you use every day... Like when you restore npm packages by GUI"
him: "what are those? I don't use them"
Also him: "command line is vintage"2 -
With this post I want to say thank you to all my fans (friends) just kidding I don't have any fans ... or friends
Well ... What I actually wanted to say is that I want to thank @EvilArcher and @naktop3031 for ++ing my things all day because they decided to push me to the 10k mark
HOLY MOLY THANK YOU AGAIN!
If this isn't a record I don't know what is
I'd also like to thank @dfox and @trogus for developing this awesome app
And every single person that ever ++ed something by me, THANK YOU
It's been an awesome journey for me since I joined devRant in October, I got to know lots of funny and great people here :D11 -
Have any JabbaScripters ever heard of backwards compatibility?
Nope. Because all the shit on NPM is written by 15-year olds who don't know how to code properly, not to say maintain their packages.
Fuck you.6 -
Shit Project Managers say.. to my coworker when I'm not there :
"Hey do you think she's working hard enough ?..I don't know, she has only made 2 commits in the past week so.. "
Fortunately my coworker defended me and told me after but yeah.. As if you could measure efforts and work in development by counting lines of code, fuck-tard.5 -
In spanish we don't say "stop being afraid" o "have no fear" word by word through translation. We say "ya no seas panocha" which roughly translates to "find bravery within you" and I think that this is beautiful.
For people that are constantly afraid we don't call them fearful in standard translation, we refer to them as "panochon" which attempts to remind them that they are in fact brave.
Use the word my friends. No sean panocha.20 -
I don't really have a notable successful project yet, but I'm working on a small game with my friend and I'd say that that's already a success. Doing something you love with people you love is amazing.1
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Don't you just love it when eclipse gives you these wonderfully informative error messages? Couldn't you at least say something?8
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"We don't use a VCS like git, what are you opinions on this?" This is great in my opinion. You get to see some people sheepishly agree and say it's fine and try back it up, or people put valid points why they think it's wrong. You can start to gauge a person's personality after a few of those kinds of questions.4
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Everywhere you go, you find these memes where developers are skeptical of their work. Things like "It works. I don't know how. It doesn't work. I don't know how.". Don't you guys think this is a huge problem? And people say that their programming language is the best, because preference. But isn't this happening because our tools suck?
Yes the problems maybe inherently complex but at least we should be able to figure out the logic behind the snipper and reason about it.
Haven't really experienced it, but they say Haskell and the likes are great at this and it must be true because it's backed by mathematical properties and laws, not " experience".
So the rant here is, wish we had better tools in the mainstream that allowed us to enjoy absolute faith in at least what we have written, regardless of the fact that we understood the problem in the domain.11 -
'I have nothing to hide'
in the last 20 hours i have heard this lie three times from three different people.
I just don't understand them. Everytime the topic privacy comes up (a lot of the times it isn't even me who starts talking about it) they I say this.
Would you want someone following you at all times, looking through your window, recording everything you say and writing all the information he gets about you into a notebook, potentially selling this information to others?
I really hope that you don't want this.
Privacy is a human right and it should stay that!
Privacy is a part of freedom and while freedom may be pretty difficult to define, privacy should always be a part of it.16 -
Today I make a big progress in agile development.
You don't say fuck you. You say your request is in the back log.
😎 -
I (don't) like how some people say "If your code needs comments, your code is probably ugly and should be rewritten".
Well, asshats. You have never considered complex calculations/functions or "temporary" workarounds, right?
Sometimes, you have to do it in a not-very-readable way for efficiency. There is no way around that in that case, and comments that either explain the code below or provide alternative, slower code that's commented really help others understand your code.
If I ever work with you and you don't bother commenting your code at all (or rather use slow code because more efficient code doesn't appeal to your "muh code dun need comments" approach), I will hate you.6 -
I'm convinced no one really understands OAuth2, probably not even the creators.
Every blog, articles and tutorial, you have people saying don't do this, don't do that. Basically, no one agrees on a single implementation.
Want to use passwords for auth in a first party system you fully own? Apparently, that's unsafe.
Hmmm, what about magic links for passwordless auth? Also not safe you say?
Okay, I believe Okta just wants people to use their services, nothing else.15 -
Dear Client,
You said it was of paramount importance that this software work flawlessly. I've worked hard to make it so, even when your indecision and lack of attention to detail indicate you don't care as much as you say and have made the project late.
Yesterday when I handed you a step-by-step user acceptance test plan, you delegated it to someone not as familiar with your specific requirements. You said you don't have time for such things.
I will remind you of those words when the project launches and you find something you dislike.
Sincerely,
Me -
When i ask you a question through skype or mail, I expect a fucking answer.
You might just say that you don't know. That is okay.
But we all fucking work from home and I can see you're there. FUCKING ANSWER YOU INCOMPETENT, USELESS, UNPROFESSIONAL SACK OF SHIT.
It is so fucking counterproductive. I fucking hope all the chocolate chips in your life turns out to be raisins.
It is fucking impossible to underestimate these people.
I am seriously jealous of all of you here on devrant, for not having met these washed up twats.8 -
Could people that want a stressbal that badly, just buy one?
Lets say the community grew with 15%. So if your rant first had to be "100 funny" to get 150++, you still need "100 funny" to get 175++.
Conclusion: you don't need to be more funny to get a stressbal. releived?
Besides that, it's free, be grateful3 -
Have I ever told you guys of the time that I had made my PM feel bad by saying I had to drop 3 classes because he was working me so hard?
Yeah that happened and he felt really bad about it!
GOOD! FUCKING GOOD! I want you to feel bad about it! Don't you dare say that I'm not putting in enough work ever again!1 -
Client :
When do you think we can get the website done with?
Me:
Don't worry, I'll get it done in 3 days.
Me after 2 and half days:
<!Doctype Html>
<html>
<head>
<title> Hello, what did you say the website does again? ....4 -
I don't think it's to complicated...
Dumb clients, no matter who they are if they want you to fix their computer ... Create a new Twitter , hack, when you don't hack.
They make our lives hell .. why ? Because ignorance.
My favourite is when they expect you to work for nothing.oh but you can have 2% it's a billion dollar idea you'll make like 20 mill!😒🙄 All I'll do is sit here since i was the genius if the idea you work out the details ? 400 hours you say? I'm sure it'll take 20 don't be silly now.1 -
The kitchen at my office is pretty small, it fits a max of two people. Today morning while making a sandwich, an infrastructure dev walks in and proceeds to say... "I hope you don't mind me standing behind you, it's really not a Christian thing to do"... what?6
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When I say "I'm a programmer", Please, don't ask me to install windows for you. It it isn't my full time job.10
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God, don't you love it when your team COMPLETELY IGNORES all the work you do, dismisses it outright, and then acts rude to you? And then when they do take one of your suggestions, they say 'wow you ACTUALLY contributed' as if you haven't been trying to contribute the whole time only to get ignored?!9
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*ahem*
You know how people say "you get the gist!", yeah?
...
I don't. 🤔
How can they expect me to GET http-colon-slash-slash-gist-dot-github-dot-com without the rest of the url?
I bet it's stored in that social context I've never been able to access.
THANK YOU, I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK 😘joke/meme instant regret help can your score become negative social interactions and spontaneous erections -
Can we please stop using continuous delivery on mobile. I don't want to update your app every other week just because you decided to change a comment.
Also Bugfixes and improvements doesn't say anything as a changelog!5 -
This was a comment I made on another ranter's post.
* Tailor your resume (and cover letter if needed) according to the job. No generic resume.
* Research about the company and make sure you have the same interests as the company. Clearly let them know why they should hire you. One question you can expect is: Why should we hire you?
* Show them that you're passionate about the job.
* Be curious. Ask questions. That's how they'll know you're interested.
* Be open to opportunities. Let's say you're applying for Full Stack developer role. Be open to take up Front End or Back End developer role. You don't have to accept everything but at least roles tangent to your job (provided they match your interest).
* Be flexible but focused.
* You don't have to know every listed requirement but make sure to know the majority.
* Don't lie. "Fake it till you make it" doesn't work with dev roles.
* Be confident in telling them "you don't know" if you don't know. Also make sure to tell you're willing to learn that.4 -
Arguing with my girlfriend (recalled from my mind, not 100% accurate)
she: What do you expect when you buy an android?
Me: sure thing apple is more "unpack it, use it", easy to use - but android is more like an empty canvas. The first thing when I buy it is setting it up to my needs.
she: You don't understand, what do you expect from your android device?
me: It has to be affordable and work for a certain time
she: No I mean, do you.. when you unpack your phone, expect it TO WORK?
me: Sure, it's not like I buy a pile of trash, I expect it to work
she: you're too stupid, baka
me: ... ? *confused*
she: When you say it is like a canvas, isn't a canvas someday full?
me: yes, every phone, iPhone, Pixel, Samsung, every phone has a limited memory
she: *mad* you don't get it, silly
me: I want to but heh, I don't get it10 -
GIT IS TRASH
WHAT'S THAT, YOU SAY? I'M JUST BEING AN IDIOT WHO ISN'T GOOD AT USING GIT? I DON'T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT YOUR OPINION, I SAY! (eventhoughitstrue). I NEED TO VENT MY ANGER, AND GIT SHALL BE MY VICTIM.
GIT IS TRASH26 -
Don't trust people. Especially if they say: "No Problem, I'll invest enough time to make x happen"
But in general. Don't trust people until you know them very well. -
Things I wish people had said at my first job (in light of lots of the people I see starting their first dev gig on here). Please add yours.
Congrats!
Take a breath, you will be fine.
If you get frustrated, take a moment to collect your thoughts.
Don't be afraid to say you don't know, you are not expected to know everything.
Your workday needs to end at a decent time. Don't overdo it or you will be useless for more of your hours.
Always take whatever length of time you think something will take and double it. If you think it will take 15 minutes, it'll probably take your 4 hours.
Concentrate on networking and personal relationships.
Pick the smartest people who have moved the most vertically and pay attention to what they say, they might know a lot.
When management makes an "unwise" or "crazy" decision, ask them why or what the context or motive is that made then arrive at that course of action. Some of them might surprise you in their bigger picture motives or dumbassedness.
Six sigma may be in your future, learn what it is.
Automate as much of your own job as possible.
Um, that's all I've got for now. Hopefully that's helpful to people just starting out. Feel free to add yours.5 -
I loose it big time when developers in my team say "it's not working" and don't even care to explain what is not working and what were you trying to do....2
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I don't like it when progress bars develop their own personality. Gurr.
Friendly reminder: see attached gif.
Uh-uh-uh, you didn't say the magic word.
Uh-uh-uh, you didn't say the magic word.7 -
me: import express from 'express';
my IDE: quick fix: remove import express from 'express'; ('express' is declared but its value is never read.)
me: // you don't say, as I only just started typing!7 -
Anyway I just want to fucking write code. I don't want to deal with people or give an opinion that is not appreciated. My manager says I am too aggressive but the truth is I hate stupidity and incompetence. I tell them their ideas are shit and not in a polite way and they make HR call me. Now I don't say shit and they are asking what I think. I think all of you are cunts that's what I think.but I don't say that. I say no comment when I know they are about to fall into a massive ditch. Will I stop them? Fuck no. Will I help them out if the ditch? Maybe, if it only involves writing code. I can't do diplomacy. I'll definitely be a fucking tyrant if I ever ruled a nation.rant ugggh fuck this and let me write killer code. i can't seem to please anyone management sucks ass14
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Programmers life reaching final day! [Spanish comic] [Don't need to know Spanish to understand] it only say the day of the weeks... you gotta understand
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At first, I was skeptical and somewhat resilient of trying Arch Linux. As a former Debian based distros user, I have to say : once you go Arch you don't go back! Time to 🍚 it up a bit more!6
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PM: I don't like the number of meetings we have
Me: Oh I agree. We have too..
PM: We don't have enough of them.
Me: (oh... I was going to say that we need to cut back... But ok)
PM: I need better visibility into what everyone is doing.
Me: (so you wanna micromanage. Got it...)
Me: ... Gotcha, yup... Writing that down.3 -
I WANT TO SAY A BIG *FUCK YOU* TO SYNCFUSION FOR OFFERING NUGETS BUT NOT MAKING IT CLEAR THAT YOU NEED TO PAY AN $1,000 LICENSE TO GET ITS CONTROLS TO WORK SO YOU WASTE A LOT OF TIME WONDERING WHY THEY DON'T WORK, AND THEIR DOCUMENTATION IS THE SHITS, AND THEN 4 HOURS LATER YOU REALIZE THAT THE REASON THEY DON'T WORK IS BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN USING THE DEMO VERSION. SO, SYNCFUSION... *FUCK YOU* WITH ALL MY MIGHT. AND IN CASE YOU DIDN'T HEAR ME *FUCK YOU* ONE MORE TIME!! BITCH!4
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I don't understand working in FAANG. As an engineer, who inherently has an ultimate say in how the computer worlds you construct work, how do you live with acceptance that you have no say whatsoever in how your company is run? how do you accept doing work that you don't always see the product benefit of?
Yes, FAANG pays a lot to ordinary engineers, but when you were dreaming back when you were a STEM student with fiery eyes, did you really want to be an ordinary engineer, no matter the bankroll? After all, it's not the total company's revenue, it's at least the revenue divided by staff count. In Nintendo, salaries are way higher than in EA, because there are way less people working at Nintendo.
Take any unicorn startup that survived. If you work there, you will have a say, you have an impact, you see the results of your work, and you will earn much more.
I wanted to work at Google as a student, but now I feel like it's just a plastic dream pitched to those inexperienced who don't know any better.
Note that above I don't even touch ethics, like anti-suicide nets in Foxconn factories that make Apple devices, let alone Facebook's and Google's surveillance.
Maybe, if you're somehow an engineer who has proficiency but not care, or if you cared, but was broken, with fire in your eyes extinguished, and now you see your work as "just work", FAANG might be a good choice.
But I can't relate.15 -
Is React really that good? Some say if you don't know React you are doing JS wrong. But everyone says that for everything.13
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Fuck you scp. I was uploading 6GB file to an EC2 server. Well, needless to say, "no space left on device" after all 6GB transferred was the biggest FUCK YOU moment. Seriously. Send the file size and check before you waste 30 minutes of my time. Oh, and don't read CLI command data as part of the transfer. You suck.8
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The question "are you busy" is the most loaded fucking BS question ever. If you answer and say you're busy you get told that you aren't that busy since you answeted the chat. If you don't answer the messenger blows up your shit asking many more times and possibly even fucking calls you.
If I don't answer, I'm busy go the fuck away. "But it was super important and I needed it fixed right away!" Ok, but when I answered your message just 4 minutes after your originally messaged me don't make me spend another 5 minutes asking for information you knew I was going to ask for and could have provided in one of your follow up messages (Client name, website, page with the problem, description of the problem). Also, don't tell me that it has to get fixed because I'm the one who made the mistake. It has to get fixed because it's wrong, it doesn't fucking matter who made the mistake.3 -
Random talk with a colleague:
-How familiar are you with oop concepts?
- I don't need that, I will make my life easier instead. They say "the" Java is faster though.
-Faster from which lang?
- C.
Me: Aw shiet.
Can't believe who I share this precious air with.7 -
First message of today :
"Hi, I'm X from the Y office. Do you remember that was you to set up our internal network two months ago? Ok, yesterday we called the elettrician to fix two wall plugs. Now our network is completely broken. Come to fix because we think you did something wrong."
I forced myself into some other jobs i had to do for about 2 hours. After that i grab the smartphone to answer.
Oh look, there is another message.
"Hi, always X from the Y office. We just restored the static IPs you setup after we've changed them early this morning. Now everything works again."
Oh really ?1 -
i'd rather burn a site to the ground to preserve it in its current state than let it devolve into a place for SJWs to basically outlaw everything because they're special snowflakes. It's about breaking video games, you don't need to say "well you can't use he/she/him/her pronouns ever, you can't acknowledge binary genders, you can't say the word 'retarded' even when referring to the dictionary definition of the word (synonym of regression), you can't send PMs at all because privacy is against God, you can't say/reference God or Christianity because #NotAllReligions"
just fuck off. We break Pokemon games, we don't plot to genocide the white race because all whites are cis racist Nazi cucks like you do goddammit
;-;15 -
When nobody takes you seriously when you say you don't do it for the money....i genuinely love what i do and you should too.
-
Has anyone else noticed when ever a question of what framework to use where React could apply, people have the shittiest reasons for using it.
"React is gud, you should use it. Ima say React a few more times to sell you on it."
"React makes my code better so it's gud."
"React react react react react."
Do your research guys, don't trust this hype-driven bullshit.16 -
How many times will you say hi to me when we're passing on the stairs for nth time? How many 👋 will you send me in one day at almost regular intervals? I'm not a fucking rest api. You don't have to generate a fucking oauth token every time you pass me some information. I have a fucking state and it's getting distracted by too much human interaction3
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The president and manager where I work always say: "We have to defy the status quo". But when I say "we don't need to do that in this way, we can do it this way which is more efficient". Then they say, "We can't because we have to do everything in the same way". You are just making yourself look stupid.
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Today, in "Marketing showed a Beta feature to a bunch of cusomters"...:
"I shouldn't have given access to the Beta server to the new user... They're gonna find all of these bugs and they're not gonna be happy..."
You don't say -
I have a coworker who, when frustrated with a bug in his code then finds the simple solution, loudly exclaims "You Idiot", or "Ah dammit", or "What the Hell?!". He also belches loudly, and says a few other humorous things throughout the day. It has inspired me to make a sound board that would say whatever he would say in a given situation. Don't think it will ever get built, but it sure would be hilarious!2
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Always include import statements. Always. No excuses. I don't care if you can't be arsed to copy-n-paste an extra bit of code.
Nothing worse than trying to learn something new, copy-n-paste a sample code then your wonderfully helpful IDE asks you which of the 8 matching packages you wish to import.
When someone asks me, "where did you get that", I don't simply say, "a shop"!!
If you don't include your imports in answers then I hate you.6 -
Authors of articles that say PHP is past because "it doesn't separate concerns" and "it just spits out HTML within logic"… please don't write about something you don't know1
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What was your first real program or website or app developed by you?
(PLEASE DON'T SAY HELLO WORLD)33 -
So I'm gonna send the e-mail with these 4 questions, is that OK or am I missing anything?
"Go ahead"
* Clicks send *
"Could you also ask..."
NO! DON'T SAY THAT'S IT'S OK TO SEND IF YOU STILL WANT TO ADD STUFF TO IT!1 -
Don't be specific on any programming languages, focus more on OOP approach, and say you know about OOD/A rather than, you know Java, C# and this and that.1
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When you ask your infrastructure admins for a firewall rule and you are very specific. They say that you don't need it... you troubleshoot for 2 hours then argue with them for 5 hours. Then they add the rule and it works. I want to punch someone right now and have a beer. FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Can we have a general appreciation thread for the kde community?
I feel like those guys and gals don't get the love they deserve, yet a lot of us use their software, desktop environment and/or Linux distro.
So, if anyone from the kde community is here, I'd just like to say thank you ♥️2 -
Teacher: "Classes and methods are pretty similar in java and c#. But in c they are a little different"
Me: "u cereal?"
Never say something you don't know shit about5 -
My fellow developer just sits next to me and is very nice person. But he keeps peeping into my screen and say -
"oh, why are you looking into x "
"oh, so you looking into y"
"oh, there is blog post on this"
It really turns me off :x
How to tell him politely that I don't like this.16 -
Wow. That's a new level of ratings.
Just read ratings like these below an ascii cam app(which works like it should):
"This is just a camera witu a mosaic filter, that's why you can't save the pictures as ascii"
"This is not real ascii because you can't save it as .txt or .html"
I don't think i need to say anything.1 -
FaceTime is not instant access in to my space. I can ignore that too. Every time you want to tell me you've sent me the logo sets me back 15 minutes. Do I really need to fucking see you to tell me that shit. It's not for you to reel off a load of requests either... when you have finished don't you here me say "put it in an email and I'll get back to you". Stop wasting my fucking time. FaceTime.1
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Things I didn't say to this project advisor, which I wish I could have:
1. Tales of your incompetence do not interest me.
2. You cannot just say something is bad and have absolutely zero direction of how it could be improved. You cannot criticize and then in response to "how do you want it changed?" say "idk".
3. You're incompetent, and I have zero clue as to whose ass have you kissed to get to where you are.
4. I hope you suffer, more than you make people who work with you suffer.
5. Now I know why the other guy resigned.
6. I'm glad that this project is over by the end of this week. I'm just afraid that you may drag it out for longer, so my fears don't let me enjoy the idea of not seeing you ever again.2 -
!Dev
I dislike the idea of therapists. I mean, not the people who study human behaviour to help understand it but the people who try to "fix" another person's problems.
My reason for this is that they're human themselves and I'd say it's pretty obvious that we don't know exactly how the mind works so it's basically like trying to fix an airplane with only half or even less of the blueprints.
The reason I don't like them being human themselves is because we are fallible, you can't guarantee or at least have a extremely high probability of the same prevention or treatment rate as you maybe could with a computer. It's not repeatable. Then again, we don't have the "blueprints" so to speak so it's kind of hard to say.
Your thoughts?5 -
Imagine being a senior dev with a green junior that says: "Well maybe there is a better way and I just don't know"
and you say:
"There is, I'm telling you"
only to continue on discussing it more.5 -
Not rant. Just a pathetic mumbling.
When you live your life hiding your true face, when you live your life keeping quiet because you don't wanna burden the loved ones, when you live your life giving others first priority...
Can you even say that you are living your life?7 -
!Rant
Looking at various Devs & non-devs like myself, ranting, posting meme's [my bad];
I realised why we keep coming back. Nope not because of the notifications, but because devRant feels like home dare I say it, it feels like family.
Thank you @dfox @trogus & the other creators who aren't that famous [my bad I don't remember your names].
Thank you.5 -
Do you think the keywords used by git (or other version control systems) are intuitive?
I'm talking to a very junior dev about git and I find myself having to explain around the fact that I don't feel the keywords are great. They are asking good questions like
* Why do you say "push the commit" but then say "make a pull request" - when I want to push why isn't it called a "push request"
* "Why are the metaphors sometimes related to trees (branches), sometimes roads (forks) but you still call it "master" instead of tree trunk or main road?
* Why do you call it "commit", what kind of commitment am I making?16 -
I hate when people say "thank you for your patience" because then I feel socially obligated to be patient when I really don't want to be 😠2
-
!rant
Don't know if you guys have this kind of boxed up stuff inside like me. I have good friends, I have a good gf, I have great family and nice colleagues. But there are still so many things I don't share with them, especially the negative feelings I usually possess. Even here I don't share all the deep dark stuff.
As much as I wanna share my true identify and personal info here, the reason I'm restraining myself from doing so is this is the only place where I can say whatever really I wanna say in my mind. Except my blog but then my blog doesn't have any reader.5 -
"We want you to run the site"
"Ok but you don't need me - the rewritten codebase is javascript and the Python proxy is in the cloud. You can run it on any cheap web hotel. Or just unzip the app on your own desktop"
"We want you to run the site."
Loop this a few times. Can't say I didn't try to save them the money...2 -
Whaaaat? Now i can't even say in public that i would like one slave robot in the future because it would sound too nasty or pollitically incorrect?
Don't know about you but... python sounds more nasty to me...7 -
You're asked if you know how to use git, you say you can but you can't.
You decide to change your entire codebase because you realized your previous approach was a bad idea.
You ask how to change the old repository-content for the new project, you receive answer but you can't get it to work, you don't ask again for help.
What's the logical consequence? Create a public GitHub-Project and dump the entire customer-project under NDA into it -.-* -
Is It correct to stop any development job because the client stopped paying? What are pros and cons about it? I think it is good, you won't work for free but I've heard some people say "It's better someone owes you money rather to have no job". I really don't like that point of view. Any other industry stop it's activities when you stop paying them... However I'm asking this because what happens if that client is a big client? Say... Walmart. Would you keep working on it's project even when it's not paying?11
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What do you say to your coworkers who want to get free copies of your paid (kinda expensive and lots of effort + time to download) work related video tutorials?
Also, sometimes they ask for it indirectly then laugh.
If they insist, should I ask them to pay for the share?
Some people don't like investing in themselves. They pay expensive tuition costs but don't want to invest while they are working.
What's the proper way to say no in a big corporate environment without looking like a bad guy? I will say yes if the justification and initiative are really good.17 -
Its so disheartening to see how easily replacable you are if you work for someone else, no matter how hard you worked. The moment you say " I am resigning", the behaviour of your manager changes so dramatically. Its like you don't exist anymore. No more new interesting work, no nothing. Why!!!!7
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Client sends screenshots, compressed, and shrunk down to an unreadable size, inside a docx file.
Just... just no. Where is a spray bottle or a rolled up newspaper when you need one.
(For you three people who are going to comment 'why don't you just teach them...' ssssssssssshut up, some people are just unteachable ( for you other three who are going to say 'everyone is teachable.' Not true, if it was you wouldn't be saying such things.))1 -
Don't understand why interviewers ask such stupid questions like where do you see yourself in 5 years?
If I goddamn knew why the hell would I be applying here.
Also why do you want to join our company?
The obvious answer is money. end of story. Why do you expect me to say the work environment blah blah blah19 -
TLDR: dealing with other people is stressful
I hate having to explain things to people and then they still don't listen.
Especially if they know nothing about the topic.... I guess like those little kids that ask Why? all the time.
Can't you see I have other things to deal with, just do what I say because unlike you I already tried ... Or just know what I'm talking about....1 -
Every time I read someone reply to a post with "lol" I stop for a moment and imagine myself actually laughing out loud to that post. I've got to say, only under ~1% of such posts were actually worth lol'ing. Other times laughing out loud to whatever is there would be retarded at best.
So either I'm a bum with only notions of a sense of humour OR there are far too many retards laughing out loud to basically anything.
Or perhaps there are too many idiots who use 'lol' without knowing what it means.
Or those people so desperately want others' attention that they lie to others pretending to like what they say/do/write by saying "what you did there made me feel so good that I burst in loud laughter".
This is stupid.
If you don't laugh OUT LOUD - then don't say that you do.
If you are not in immediate danger threatening to your life - then don't say you are LITERALLY DYING.
FFS, is it THAT hard?26 -
Positively accepting criticism is a superpower I hope to acquire one day. As in jump in joy and violently smile when they say my code is shit level of positive acceptance.
I don't really hate or reject criticism. I am simply saddened by it, on a good day.
so yes, if you have this superpower, where's the source?2 -
Forget about everything I could say these last 2 days: I'm having as much fun with Docker than when I first discovered Ruby on Rails 3 years ago 😍
I still don't understand everything with docker-compose & shit but so much things are way more clear when you try them out!1 -
Studying engineering doesn't make you an expert physicist, and studying medicine doesn't make you an expert virologist. Learn the bloody difference, just because somebody has a degree doesn't mean all they say is true and verified, especially if the don't list their sources or talk about it "exclusively" for one media.3
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Can people at least write a damn comment and tell me why the fuck they don't like the app???
Yesterday I released an update and noticed someone left a new review, without comments, just a one star review.
First I was worried because maybe the update has some nasty bug, but no, this stupid user rated the app without leaving a comment, GREAT!!!
Now google only shows that specific review because the others were of an old version, so great, now anybody wanting to install my app will only see this shit.
If you already took the time to open the play store specifically to rate the app, fucking say something!!! insult me, say it's a bunch of crap but say something you piece of shit!5 -
Yeah, handouts create lazy people I'm not impressed with
You want something in life, then why don't you go and get it?
Actions speak louder than words do, it's pretty quiet, isn't it?
Look at the world we live in, defined by comment sections
Surround yourself with people that challenge how you think
Not people that nod their head and act like they agree
Those people will cut you open just to watch you bleed
Always be yourself, not the person that you pretend to be, no!
These people gon' tell you that you will never make it
Then when you do, they gon' say they knew you were goin' places
That's just how it works, next thing you know you'll be overrated
Hearing people say they miss the "old you, " it's crazy, ain't it?
And perfect people don't exist, so don't pretend to be one
I don't need pats on the back from people for my achievements
When I die I wanna know that I lived for a reason
Anyone can take your life, but not what you believe in, no
Just remember this
Yeah, don't take opinions from people that won't listen to yours
If money's where you find happiness, you'll always be poor
If you don't like the job you have, then what do you do it for?
The cure to pain isn't something you buy at liquor stores, nah
The real you is not defined by the size of your office
The real you is who you are when ain't nobody watchin'
You spend your whole life worried about what's in your wallet
For what? That money won't show up in your coffin, woo!
Yeah, anger's a liar, he ain't got no respect
I fell in love with my pain and I slept with my regrets
Happiness saw it happen, maybe that's why she up and left
Joy called me a cheater, said she ain't coming back
I've always had a problem with relationships
But that's what happens when you see the world through a broken lens
Mistakes can make you grow, that doesn't mean you're friends
Who you are is up to you, don't leave it up to them, no
Just remember this
Yeah, they say you got into music, you signed up to be hated
That's kinda weird cause I don't remember signing my name up
Coming from people that give advice but never take none
I like my privacy, but, lately, I feel it's invaded
I heard that life's too short, don't let it pass you by
We waste a lot of time crying over wasted time
It's not about what people think, it's how you feel inside
My biggest failures in life are knowing I never tried, woo!
I look at the world from a different angle
People change, even Satan used to be an angel
Think twice before you're bitin' on the hand that made you
Don't believe what you believe just 'cause that's how they raised you
Think your own thoughts, don't let them do it for you
Say you want a drink, don't wait for people to pour it on you
Cut out the liars, stay close to the people you know are loyal
Grab your own glass and fill it, don't let your fear destroy you, woo!2 -
Awesome wallpaper of devrant...
I don't remember who gave me the link of this wallpaper
Whoever it was just want to say Thank You !!!!!8 -
You so are fucking stupid!!! You don't fit in this team because of your stupidity! For one get a fucking grip on life will ya and stop with the money thing the only thing you say is money this money that.
Second fucking learn the view the world with logic in mind, if some things don't work on websites that you designed than your knowledge of websites and the web in general is to low to begin with!!1 -
Obligatory I hate C++ rant
And no, I don't care what anyone has to say, you have to be masochistic to enjoy working with this crap13 -
When I say Unsubscribe, I mean Unsubscribe you stupid annoying spammer, I don't care anymore about your shit
-
in the freelance marketplaces, some people write, "Need a freelance developer for SMALL TASK". who the hell defines those tasks as SMALL task? if you knew this is a SMALL task, why don't you just do it yourself? if its so small, why don't you just ignore it? if its a small task, why don't you just spend five-ten minutes of your "precious" time to learn how to fix it?
& then when it comes to paying, they say, "My budget is 5$, because its a small task"
Seriously? in 5$ my electricity bill wouldn't be covered.
& Then comes to the marketplace commission! Most of the times, its about 20%
So, I get 4$
Then it comes to the bank tax and blah blah!
So, now I get around 2$ or 3$
Now, I don't know whom should I kill first -_-
The clients or the marketplace owner or the government or the bank owner or myself :}11 -
Don't you just love it, when Windows lovers community just throws user's concerns and issues right back into their faces? "it works for me!" they say.
On the other hand, Linux sucks. (because it still got a lot of room for improvements!)
Seriously, we need better OSs.11 -
I formatted my entire hard drive, installed an unlicensed windows 8.1 and ran a shit ton of cracked patching on it; even went hunting for a fuckload of drivers, just so I don't have to use Windows 10.
"But it's not so bad" you say. Well, merry Christmas to you and your six hours of unskippable, non-disablebale updates per week, strategically placed to cause maximum disruption to your work, my friends.11 -
To you, who use Windows 11. Is there at least one feature that makes you glad you switched from 10 to 11? Or maybe not necessarily glad, but it would make you appreciate the new OS? One thing that would make the upgrade worth it... I myself can not think of a single fucking thing. (Please don't say better HDR support, that's the one most often mentioned feature. Definitely not good enough reason to have a new OS)11
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Microsoft has put out some really fantastic and educational lectures for free on YouTube. And I understand they have to use Microsoft technology but it makes me cringe when they say things like "Now I'm going to open Microsoft Edge and use Bing." You're working on a projector, we all see you doing it, you don't have to rub salt in the wound.2
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If you have any project (personal or not, doesn't matter) that does not have proper code comments and documentation and you don't want to make one because of the effort (maybe even "wasted" effort), think again. When commenting on a wall of code to say what it does, you may find a better way of doing what you have to do, possibly increasing performance, or improving security.
I have been able to do better input sanitization for a method on a personal project of mine because of this.
Don't use the amount of effort for proper documentation as an excuse not to make one.2 -
Sometimes I get in a mode where everyone is a potential enemy. So my mind will be say, "The fuck you say!?" in a reactionary way. When this happens I sometimes respond badly online. I am noticing this pattern before I respond. It can take great effort to not post shit online at times.
My general goals when conversing online these days:
1. Spread joy through humor. (it isn't my problem if you don't think it is funny)
2. Care for people by telling the truth. (it isn't my problem if you don't think its true. I do like exchanging ideas.)
3. Try to listen and help people if they exhibit a perceptible need. (sometimes a lone voice reaching out can make a huge difference)
4. Restrain myself when someone aggressively challenges my beliefs. (work in progress, the fuck you say?!)
5. Sharing common interests with people. (games, programming, staying sane, etc)
6. Shitting on Javascript. (not because it is true, but because it is funny. see goal 1)1 -
My dev teacher for mobile was teaching us react native. I got an error while compiling it (missed a try catch in a function). My teacher only looked at my code and I hear her say to herself "no semycolon missing" and then she says to me, I don't know what's wrong...
Like... Are you seriously a teacher?2 -
I have do optimize a website to work in internet explorer... Hell no, but have to.
Which version will you then say that it should at least work in? Just the newest one.
I don't think I can get it to work in every single old internet explorer, but maybe the newest one could be possible.20 -
Know your shit and don't give a fuck.
Sometimes interviewers are just idiots or monkeys.
I dunno, I've had a few interviews where it just doesn't click. While I'm sitting there, I say to myself: this is nothing like what you said on your job description.. and I've seen all your "technical questions" on Google -
My conversation with Avalara support (API for taxing):
Me: Hey I'm implementing your API for a client. The requests are going through, I get a valid response back but all goods are taxed with $0. Can you please give me a hint what I might be missing?
Sup: You're using Salesforce Commerce Cloud, requests might be blocked through their firewall
Me: I don't think so, here are some sample requests and responses I just created. The object returned matches the one in your API Doc.
Sup: This isn't a system controlled by us, no support.
Me: So how in the world can it be you don't control your own endpoint?
Seriously, if you don't want to help, next time just say fuck you...5 -
I realize that people are breaking the rules. No longer social distance themselves and wear mask.
Here's some idea hold your fart and release it in a closed room and say this "if you don't care about an invisible pathogen , why would you concerned about an invisible atom bomb? "3 -
Don't even say your initial time estimate/guess out loud. It will probably become your deadline, and you probably assumed that most things would take a reasonable amout of time.
Bonus: Try to get onto projects that you think you can get interested in. Once on a project try to keep interested in it's success.8 -
I have a question for you guys. What level of education tends to be required to get a good dev job?
I've seen some people say bachelor's degree, I've seen some people say it doesn't matter much. I really don't fucking know. I'm in my senior year of high school and I need to know what exactly I'm gonna fucking do with my life.10 -
When your company ask to put your views on Glassdoor and you don't have any good to say.
#vicious cycle .
Life is hell6 -
Code didn't change my life because I've been coding since I was a kid. You could say that it shaped my life instead. I don't know life without code. I don't know if that's good or it's not...
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When you say to a non-techy: "This is complex."
Meaning: "I don't want to spend my time explaining this to you" / "I don't care".1 -
How many devranters have you followed on here? I add a few every day... Must be at like 300 or so by now. I
It would be a 1000 if I could follow on desktop version. Love hearing from you all.
And I don't usually say that shit to people.13 -
Be who you are and say what you will, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
-
Do you say to police officers "Please stop me if I'm breaking any laws"?
Do you say to traffic wardens "Please fine me if I'm parked illegally"?
Do you say to rental agents "Please reject my application if I don't meet the requirements"?
Do you say to Restauranteurs "Please turn me away if I don't have a reservation"?
Do you say to Airport staff "Please confiscate my item if it's prohibited"?
...
...then why would you say to a Facebook Group Admin "Please delete if not allowed"?2 -
I don't like things like "programming is copy&paste"
But if you think about it... Actually it is: when you don't know how to use a function or how to write a new language you read the docs, copying and using what they say 🤔
Stack Overflow? It's a doc full of examples 😁6 -
Wait a moment sublime... really? I don't have the option to say no to all the 10,000+ replace action?
Now you have me clicking "No", "No", "No"... like a maniac! (-‸ლ)25 -
Some business users have been chasing me all week to produce a report using some old report with some modifications.
I didn't write the old code and have no context as to what the data is.
My current reaction is:
so you want a report that says X using some vague input which you haven't clearly defined or explained to me...
Have you heard about black boxes and overfitting (i.e. reverse engineering a process based on sample data)?
TLDR: I can generate a report that will say anything you want it to say... doesn't mean it will be right in future use cases.
Why don't people (originally GBoard suggested peepee) understand "junk in = junk out" -
Code what you enjoy. Don't code what people say will "improve your skills." If something interests you, learn about it. Also, try broadening your interests. Learn new things that you may not have thought about before. It might be fun.4
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On The State of Twitter And The World
(important update: everything is still shit and heres 10 reasons why)
Why does it seem like in order to get ahead in life everyone has to self promote now?
It's not enough to be on twitter. You have to like posts. It's not enough to like posts, you have to ask directly for endorsement. But don't ask too directly. And make sure you read this "55 reasons why I don't retweet you list", where I say "remember to stay relevant!"
and "you only ever tweet me when you have something to sell." and "remember to carry on conversations."
Great so we've went back from marketing to sales.
To read the rest, don't forget to visit my fucking link..
http://freetexthost.com/iqbdmh1tut7 -
I don't get publicity hungry personalities on Medium. Their usual headlines :
"Why we left `${ insert framework}`. There's nothing wrong with it though."
Either have the balls to say you didn't do your homework when you started, or hold your peace.
Don't screw the hardworking folks whose code you depended on before bailing out. -
It's true what they say.
You don't mess with hot glue without burning yourself.
It would be funny if I didn't have my pointer fingers burned up lol.4 -
Single page apps? Why are there not more complaints?
Why are there so many ways to "build" these apps? Where are the standards?
Also, what do you prefer, framework wise? Please don't say Ember.10 -
'It's just...' is the biggest lie any co-dev can give you!
If it's just a small change why don't they do the god damn work and spend the next 2 days wading through an undocumented shit storm.
Next person to say 'It's just x, y & x', that ticket will be going up their tail pipe sideways! -
!rant
Has any of you ever felt like you were going straight towards a burnout if you keep doing your actual job but consequently don't have any energy left during spare time to learn something new, new skills you would need to land a better job? Think changing programming "branch".
How/what did you do? I'm thinking of trying to get my boss to let me work less hours... But I honestly don't know if it would be enough.
Any advice?
Sorry for the downer post, I'll be back with shit my colleagues say soon enough ;)4 -
So get this, I try making an appointment at the bank twice, they don't call me either time so I call them and they say they'll call me back sooo they never call me back. So today I go to the bank office because fuck it right ill just come in then and guess what I'm told? Oh euh you need an appointment to open a business account LIKE FUCK YOU YOU TWAT I TRIED MAKING AN APPOINTMENT FUCKING TWICE2
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When I say I'm a developer, it means that, in simpleton language, that I don't do your backups, I don't "repair" you PC because you're a baffon and I certainly do not edit company's logo which is in .png format deliver it in .cdr file and expect it as, as good and perfect as original, So fuck you, you impatient , imbecile , pompous prick I've ever met
> "Yeah take as much time as you want, but do it quickly"
I mean what the fuck does that even mean, if you want it done quickly then say so, be a man and face it and don't hide behind the excuse of "take as much time as you want"
Fucking idiots, little do they know when I'm in the zone I need time to think before act so I don't get blamed for "un-satisfied" product in the future.
So I've decided to leave loopholes in the current project I've been working on, deliver it, and leave the company and make their lives living hell, I know this is beneath anyone's standards but I have to do this to teach them how to treat a person properly,FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK,
This is going to be fun9 -
New favorite statement/question: "OK, but WHY?"
When co-workers want access to something, when clients request stupid features, when clients say almost anything really.
If you can't tell me why, then I probably don't need to waste my time on it.1 -
!rant
Went to a hackathon this weekend. We didn't win, but at least I can say I enjoyed working with the guys and we finished the prototype on time.
So, if you have never been in a hackathon, you should go, it's an awesome experience and even though if you don't win, you'll end up learning a lot. -
Ugh there's little to no labor laws for developers.
Sometimes they don't even list software development as an industry.
We don't really analyze business finances, but we create tools that help real analysts to gather data and visualize economic trends. We don't really teach kids, but we create tools for schools. We're not in retail, but our cusomters are.
"Oh I know! You're an **electrician**. I'll put you next to the people who install air conditioning."
"How about... storage services?" I say "we storage our customer's data. At least that is accurate."
"Oh yeah like wholesale!"
"I recommend you write down telecomuncations." I mean, we do use HTTP if that's what you mean, but would you call a restaurant to be in the telecommunications industry just because they have social media accounts?3 -
if you ask me how the method i wrote works because you don't understand it, and you don't let me finish my sentences without interrupting me, then you deserve to be punched.
LET ME FINISH WHAT I HAVE TO SAY YOU DUMB SHIT
I WROTE THAT FUCKIN METHOD
I KNOW WHAT IT DOES AND WHY -
How do you fuck around on a breadboard/arduino if you have sweaty hands? And don't say stop abusing Amphetamines.3
-
A customer of ours not to say names trains people for infosec certs upon investigating their website I noticed they don't have forward secrecy enabled.
Why? What? Even?
Turn it on you baddies.2 -
I hate when people say "why do you prefer programming instead of football/sports? " . I like sports but I hate all the super addicted people who fight just because someone said " I don't follow your team".
Is too bad to say that I don't know all the players of a team ? If I say so there will be always someone saying " We know that, you are a fucking nerd.".
Oh well sorry for the angry post. I am more calm now.9 -
I just hate trends...
A few years ago, if a website would show customized content (like news, posts) we would say that the job is done by a robot, scripts, filters...
Now days is AI this, AI that... Buy this bike, it as collision sensors so it's AI powered... New washing machine with inteligent AI.. You don't have to set half or full load because the AI will do that for you...1 -
i was trying to explain to someone that we have really specific problems that others don't really understand, which i think is why devrant exists. it was kinda frustrating, cause idk if i explained it very well.
what would you guys say is the worst part of working as a dev that others wouldn't get?11 -
Don't ya just love it when someone you work with is constantly asking you to do stuff. Even though you literally ask nothing of them. Can't say no though because then they throw a gigantic 11 year old temper tantrum..1
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Visual Studio, if you don't stop mangling the indenting in my .cshtml files, I'm going to put my Wellington boots on and kick you squarely in the minge.
Don't say I didn't warn you. -
Say after me:
/usr means USER!!!
$PWD means PASSWORD!!!
/dev means DEVELOPMENT!!!!
Don't you dare question this!!1!5 -
Just spent all morning adding my own user account to my local MongoDB because some network security guy found I was running an unprotected server on my PC....
I tried all the admin roles to get full access across all databases I have but none worked....
Until I see one at the bottom of the official documentation:
root -
Sitting and making mobile phones do what i want. When i tell them what i really do they just say:"I don't any word you say, but i think it's good!" 🤔
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https://prodajatest.byethost7.com/
My first public website... Please don't say how it is bad because I know believe me :) There is probably XSS and SQL innection attacks so feel free to play with it. Also it is on serbian but you will figure your way in and out (if you even open the website)6 -
Dear Python linters, why can't any of you implement some actual linting features? Like, say, consistent use of single or double quotes? Or dict() vs {}? How about indenting nested function calls? Forcing list / set / dict literals as multiline? Trailing commas?
And while I'm at it, why can't you handle dependencies properly? Say, separating linter & linter plugins from the remaining dependencies in a way where I don't have to manually remove them from the requirements lockfile every time?3 -
Gooooooo awayyyyyyy
All I wanna do is play my Chinese grill cartoon games of infinite dodging in peeaaceee
And while you're 100% complete why don't I just go down and make some tea and come back for you to still be 100%,as they say, "" complete "" -
I want you to make that dream become a reality, because if you don't, you will be working for somebody else to make their dreams become a reality.
Listen to me, if it was easy, everybody would do it. There are people right now who are working who don't want to work. There are people who hate their jobs, but they keep getting up to do it.
I'm here to tell you, number one, that most of you say you wanna be successful but you don't want it bad, you just kinda want it. You don't want it badder than you wanna party. You don't want it as much as you wanna be cool.
So what I'm telling you is, when you want something bad you can't count the cost. Because if you count the cost and you see how much it costs. You might quit, you might give up. So you gotta go in knowing that I don't count the cost.
You just do whatever it takes, to get whatever you want! Boom! 👊 😎 👍3 -
Friend : Have you take a look at this part? We will discuss it this Friday.
What I want to say :
"Don't underestimate my ability to procrastinate, sleep on my problem, run away from my responsibilities, and don't give a sh*t about everything."
What I actually said:
"Of course but I will look at it again thoroughly."
_______________________
Maybe my frustration and depression are not showing enough on my face.
: /1 -
If you ask any sane person "hey, do you want to get some disease with fever, headache and potential risk of dying?", I doubt anyone will say "yes".
But if there exist a way to prevent it with a proven efficacy from both evidence-based medicine and science, why not get it today? I'm not even talking about covid. Why people are not getting their flu shots? How's that logic works? You mean you don't want disease, but you also don't want to take any measures to prevent it?
Every time in late autumn people get cold. For a sane person, one such case with themselves is enough to say "hey, I don't want this to happen again the next autumn". Yet people do nothing.
I can't understand this.
And this is only a flu. Hepatitis will destroy your liver and potentially will destroy your whole life, so why avoid vaccination?8 -
Well my greatest mentor has been bad experiences. Its always there, lurking in the corner to mentor me. And well i do take a lesson or two, now and then to keep me afloat.
As they say- what doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.
Human mentors have been missing from my life. Superheroes don't exist :-/ -
I've seen a lot of buzz around the EU's GDPR and since I don't live there I'm wondering if it applies only if you store personal data and should it count if it's hashed for example?🤔
Let's say you hash a client's IP, it's not technically his data you've irreversibly transformed it into something else, like a computation.
For example let's say he provides you with a number and you multiply it by another and store the result, let's say 2 x 2 = 4, Is the 4 his data or yours?
Also I'm really interested in the general opinion of ranters about article 13.14 -
Just started a blog. It doesn't look pretty and I just grabbed the first fully free platform I could - I don't care how it looks. I intend to post on it every time I learn something interesting or have something I think is decent to say.
Check it out if you want
https://freema489.wixsite.com/codet...1 -
I hate all these fucking companies that say "We'll get back to you" after a fucking interview and they never fucking do, gurzle on my fucking nutsack fucking fucktards. Don't they have fucking courtesy to at least say you're out motherfucker, they just never get back to you.
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instagrams "based on likes" is total bullshit, I don't like shit those suggestions like but if you scroll through your contacts you'll find those suggestions. Why not just say it like it is: "from your contacts or from your friends contacts"3
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Being on second line support, I don't feel I need to say much else as I'm sure many of you know my pain right noe
-
You know what's terrifying? When you hear a contracts person say "we already know what we're going to bid, so we don't need engineering inputs."
-
When you have time, can you squeeze this project in?
Look, I don't have time ever. Projects are scheduled months in advance. Nothing ever finishes ahead of schedule. If you want to bump another project, just say it! -
"We follow the AGILE methodology."
A fancy way to say :
- We mostly work on tight deadlines.
- We will come with last second changes.
- We have little/no overtime payement policies.
- We will ask you to do basically anything even if you said explicitly that you don't know how to do it.2 -
Code as often as you can. Don't burn yourself out, you don't have to strive for a daily masterpiece, but do something.
You're just starting and these new skills need constant work I you don't want to lose them immediately, so if your company tries to put you on something else that's not your job, don't be afraid to say no. If you start working IT for them "just to help out, just for now", you'll undo all your hard work and have to start again from scratch down the line.2 -
When someone sends you a link to an existing product and tells you, can you clone the whole thing instead of paying that usd39.99/month.
I don't know what to say.6 -
just heard about an LG fridge with built-in Windows 10Tab:
"The fridge has an Intel processor and 2GB RAM. It will not replace your Desktop-PC!"
//you don't say2 -
I hate people who don't do basic debug and say that it is a Infra/DevOps pipeline issues. If you are not able to compile in your local how it can be compiled by CI engine.2
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How I fucking hate those programmers who say they only can do backend stuff because they don't like front-end work... You godamn pussies, as a programmer you have to be able to adapt to a given projects requirements. If you are not able to do that you are not a real developer in my eyes. So grow a pair and the next time you have the chance to do some frontend work take it, maybe there is someone who in return would like to dable in some backend work for once.13
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I know your code is great and that you learned about scrum a month ago. But I didn't know the scrum training had to say you don't assign yourself tasks, mark them as done and be surprised when other team members haven't done them, two minutes to five the day before a national holiday (yesterday).
-
Solution to issue at redhat.com: "Subscriber exclusive content. An active red hat subscription is required to participate" (and read the solution)
What the hell is this kind of bullshit?! Don't say that you have the solution if you won't share. -
Don't you love it when your in a class, let's say a Web Dev 1 class at a community college, and your surrounded by classmates that are completely computer illiterate and have to help them every step of the way, including reminding them what git clone does10
-
At school during my free time I work on random coding projects, and I get at least one person say to one of their friends " Oh! He's hacking!" And they say it like I can't hear it. Then I always get someone asking me "What language is that?" So I say the language, usually Python, Java, or PHP, next they say "Oh I program in HTML." I really want to tell him that HTML isn't programming, but I really don't want to waste my breath.
I wish people would mind their own fucking buisness, or at least know what your fucking talking about before you open your mouth.
🦆2 -
When people give you something related to IT and expect you to know everything about it, literally because you have an IT job.
For example; my aunt out of no where shoved me her phone and said 'here' she expects me to know her Facebook email address and password. When I say, it's your login details, I don't know them she states 'Oh well your in IT you can fit it right?'
-_-
Fuck sake1 -
Why the flying fuck does a resultset get returned with the pointer going to BEFORE the first fucking entry? And why does the error say "no data available"????
I saw the stinking values in the debugger, you fat cunt, don't tell me there is nothing there.
But hey, at least now my boss doesn't have any expectations whatsoever. I sure am dense motherfucker.1 -
If you are into Postgres and don't know this guy than I don't know what to say...
I wonder if he's on devRant2 -
The "voluntary" Affirmative Action tracking questions on your site's job applications are no longer voluntary if you don't have an "I choose not to say" option and refuse to accept the placeholder "Choose One"...
"Refusal to provide this information will not subject you to adverse treatment." ...other than the inability to submit your application, of course. -
So if you're invited to your "friend's" wedding, is it okay to say you can't / don't want to come?8
-
Webpack, requirejs, AMD, browserify all are wonderful tools but they don't play nice with node(client side) .
I LITERALLY switched between all, because the hacks worked but not quite. (Using node and electron, go figure!)
You know what they say fifth times the charm.1 -
Prank idea: call a colleague's phone and if they don't have your number (you'll notice by the way they talk), they won't know it's you. Then try to convince them they've somehow created a data breach and you have access to their company's source code... 😈
Oh, and if they do have your number just say you accidentally called the wrong person. -
I hate when a developer doesn't know how to use git. He never asks for advice or help until has pushes his changes up and creates a mess out of the main branch instead of creating his own feature branch. I mean there is no problem if you don't know how to use git, but you have a real problem if you say you know how to use it just to "look normal and experienced" and in reality you just don't know how to do stuff there. Just ask for help... and then if you create a mess out of git... Well, solve it and learn.2
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I don't understand one thing and that is people who say they are going To delete their
Devrant account and make an announcement and post it 1st, as though they just announced they wan't to kill themselves. if you're really tired of devrant you'll just delete the account. You wouldn't announce it. Which leads to the Only other logical conclusion... you're just looking for attention aren't you11 -
I'm tired. I don't want to do these tests anymore. These vague test scenarios I have to decrypt on my own lest asking business shows signs of weakness. I'm slow to test and going way beyond the hours the client estimated and you folks just accepted. How can I finish this when I get pulled to meetings which I am not the decision maker but I'm supposed to be the technical one to help them decide. In between this testing I get emails to help check on issues I'm not even a part of. Production issues I can understand because those have a feel of critical and priority but if you pull me to that I lose time testing. I'm trying. But I'm truly very slow at this. I'm a slow tester for this set of test cases. I'm hating myself every minute as the hours inch to the deadline which is today. I want to sleep but I want to finish as well. Shitty days of drone work that could have been given to somebody else but I can't say no to because you guys accepted. Someone from management just see please, don't give this to me. But you can't see. You probably don't even understand. They asked, you caved because you can't see the list of tasks and level of detail that comes with each thing they ask. This testing is a ridiculous use of my time but I can't say that to the client. You could have. I want to. I truly want to say "Fuck these tests". I tried to push back. But the client of course reasoned back and it was understandable to ask. To do what's good and what's best. How can I say no to that?! I'm almost depleted. I'll just finish this somehow.
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What do you drink while you're programming?
Don't say "coffee, energy drinks", post the model/type.
I'm from Spain, and usually I drink this: http://coffee.wikia.com/wiki/...28 -
At university: Error 404
But as I say: you can learn from everything, from good how to do the things, from bad how to not do the things.
One example: don't copy code directly from a PowerPoint presentation, it will change the " to other symbol and make you look like a fool when the compiler throws errors and you don't figure it out why -
So I heard a character in a game say this: "You are so stupid that you don't know that you are stupid." They were not saying this to me. It was to a common enemy. However, I am unsure if I am smart enough to be offended by this statement.3
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Honest question.
Developers that don't work for a company and that don't use freelancing platforms but are successful, you're making good money, how do you guys do it? What advice would you give me, I really just started out as a developer a few years ago and I can say I'm still struggling but have high hopes for the future. Any advice is okay.4 -
At what point do you say a junior dev is no longer a junior? What metrics do you use? Like scope of knowledge, impact on team / code decisions, years experience, management skills, etc.?
I feel I'm qualified as a mid level developer now despite only being a junior for a little over a year. I had tons of internships in college and was kind of placed in a role where growing fast was required.
I broke a sweat for most of that ~1 year I worked as a junior and my contributions to my project aren't insignificant
I don't say that to toot my own horn here, I really do want to ground myself in reality. But I don't know if my standards are too low or my organizations standards are too high. FWIW, other devs on my team have commented privately / informally that the junior title isn't super fitting.
I'm still pretty dependent on my boss but that's more for final say of things. He'll often have some input to my work but I'll also be involved with design discussion and take up a large chunk of work without question. On light sprints I'm knocking out 20+ taskhours of work, going closer to 30/40 when things pick up. Not uncommon to kill 10 user stories in a sprint.
I don't know, what do you guys think?8 -
Worst technology ever by far I have to say JsData. It's a framework for javascript ofering ORM facilities so you don't have to deal with Ajax yourself. The nightmares with data being cached and not updated, the fact that the response must always be an object with an id. Why? Just why? 😨1
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When you have to do something as a group in class and you don't do or say anything
I just stayed in the back, maybe a bad idea...
They just did a bunch of crap, titled it "fuck bitches get riches" and put my name under it, I drew over my name, but they've been calling me leader since then, after lunch they continued with teacher, sendai, and eventually father
What a bunch of idiots -
It would be neat if you could filter by tags, like you can filter by categories now.
So you can e.g. say "I don't want to see any posts with the tags 'gdpr' 'github' 'microsoft' "
(My feed would probably be empty afterwards, but that's not the point)1 -
Dad used to say "now don't you go getting depressed" yet he was one of the most unhappy men alive and now I know why when my comparison against the world is a full trash can
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My family members are support me, they know I'm unsaveable about this. Only my wife sais when I'm learning (I am before career change), you should stop playing and take care something useful instead. Or when I say I have to work on something, her answer is like, It's not work if you enjoy it and don't get money for it, it is only a hobby.
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Are you able to imagine working on group project without VCS and project management software like Jira?
You don't have to imagine it, just go on my university where people would most preferably use notepad and pendrives to share files.
Gotta say, that's an interesting experience. -
Fuck you, whoever kicked me out of LinkHub Discord server + revoked repo access... i even contributed. I don't care if you shut down everything, just say something before kicking me out... rude mf3
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/(ò.ó)┛彡┻━┻
Why can't you just do what I say... I don't need ur opinion on points that I specifically stated should be done a certain way....
I don't want to spend 30mins arguing with you... I already got enough work as it is and ur supposed to be helping me...
I don't have time to explain everything to you... Just what I need you to do....
There's a reason I got promoted and you didn't...4 -
when someone suggest you a project idea out of their genius mind,
and the story is either it's impossible or there are tons of implementations.
you'll be like " you are so naive, you don't know anything", but you can't say that because you wanna make friends. -
Ask the community who's hiring, visit user groups and other tech gatherings. Being an organizer really helps also, put that on your resume along with any highlighted side projects. When interviewed and asked something you don't know, say "I'm not sure, but I'm really eager to learn"
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they say don't talk about the future. well the future is come and gone so technically its the past and all you people are trapping yourselves in it for no valid reason. looks like i'm going to be imprisoned in the near future
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I'm looking for joining a group to join or have some people join my team
1. I'm great with XML files and normal java files
2. I don't need to be paid unless your team can pay me
3. When I say some people to join my team I mean by if you don't have a group and you don't want to go through the trouble of creating a group
If you want to have a group then join my discord server https://discord.gg/pMsrAMs and you can own the group3 -
Have you ever declined an already signed offer to take another one? If so, what's the way that you've handled it?
I just don't want to say to them that is for personal reasons because I'm pretty sure they would know it's about money .
(Signed offer but won't start in the position until June 1st.)2 -
When you want to investigate what a function does, you read the name and say "ok, seems reasonable what it should be doing" ... and then you encounter an adventure of if-else's, nested if's and else's, some promises here and there (with more nested if's and else's) and also a bunch of dispatches sprinkled all over the place. You want to refactor it into tinier functions but can't because you don't know what happens where ... help ... 🙄😩
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class devRantPost
{
bool isRant = false;
string title = "Feature idea";
string content = "\n
If you try to buy something and the purchase fails, the error message should say this: Stop trying to use Lucky Patcher!";
bool isTried = totallyNot;
bool isWorked = false;
string purpose = "Research";
string content2 = "Pls don't ban me!";
}3 -
I set the voice password for my Android phone, it asked me to say ok Google three times.
Why can't it allowed me to name my phone ? Like Cindy Cindy Cindy ????? Don't you think that will be much safer and easier? No need to have data connection to unlock. -
When you want to have the family watch Sneakers for the first time but they say they don't want to watch some stupid old movie.
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Yaaay Myopia has entered the chat!
never been nearsided before but god its annoying.
couldn't even see or read the waffle cones tag on the box and don't even say glasses those will turn you eyes into dormant jellies. yuck!!!
to be honest i never touched grass in 2 years :P
(unless it was school sol testing or going out to the store)2 -
So I've been working with heavily data centric applications for 15 years or so. And I must say moving our data warehouse into the G Cloud was the worst idea ever. No tooling, everything is barely working, debugging is a nightmare.
If you are thinking about it, just don't.3 -
One thing that I hate.
I don't remember having ever used Facebook to login into Quora. Yeah, you might say I did, but still I find it treacherously insane that they do this kind of linking with my information.2 -
Hey guys,
Would you like to join the production support team in early stage of your career ?
Let me know your thoughts.. anyways I don't have a choice to say no.9