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My first dev job was the worst! The woman in charge of the building was always on my ass! She didn't really understand what programming was and didn't like that I smoked in my office... Then I moved out of my mom's house and got my own place9
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Asshole trying to steal credit for my work. Can't wait for the next meeting to light this shit.
So this client hires me and this person that I'm gonna call 'B'. B deletes my name from the comments and description. Then proceeds to present it as his.
But B can't get it to run now, so they have me have a look at it. B thinks that I don't notice that he is trying to take credit for my shit. Now I'm sitting here with evidence for the next meeting with the client. Ignoring all of B's communications.54 -
Client: Where are we with the project, it's been a week and I see nothing.
Me: You asked me to do something that was not in the agreed scope of work, which has kept me from starting on the project.
Client: Do I need to plan out everything in advance on paper for you to get it done in a timely manner?
Me: Is that a serious question? Yes, you should. That's the whole point of creating a scope of work. It's to allow me to schedule out the time necessary to build out a product in a "timely manner".
Client: I don't appreciate your attitude. This is not how you should be doing business if you like making money.
Me: I don't appreciate your condescending, unreasonable, dickhead mentality that makes you think it's remotely okay to act like you're better than me. Money doesn't grant you the right to be a dickwad, and just because I'm being paid doesn't mean I have to put up with any level of arrogance or disrespect.
I am in this business to make money, but not at the cost of my dignity and self-respect. You will be receiving a full refund later today, not because I have to provide a refund, but because I never want to communicate with you ever again moving forward. Take your unacceptable bullshit somewhere else.14 -
So I got the job. Here's a story, never let anyone stop you from accomplishing your dreams!
It all started in 2010. Windows just crashed unrecoverably for the 3rd time in two years. Back then I wasn't good with computers yet so we got our tech guy to look at it and he said: "either pay for a windows license again (we nearly spend 1K on licenses already) or try another operating system which is free: Ubuntu. If you don't like it anyways, we can always switch back to Windows!"
Oh well, fair enough, not much to lose, right! So we went with Ubuntu. Within about 2 hours I could find everything. From the software installer to OpenOffice, browsers, email things and so on. Also I already got the basics of the Linux terminal (bash in this case) like ls, cd, mkdir and a few more.
My parents found it very easy to work with as well so we decided to stick with it.
I already started to experiment with some html/css code because the thought of being able to write my own websites was awesome! Within about a week or so I figured out a simple html site.
Then I started to experiment more and more.
After about a year of trial and error (repeat about 1000+ times) I finally got my first Apache server setup on a VirtualBox running Ubuntu server. Damn, it felt awesome to see my own shit working!
From that moment on I continued to try everything I could with Linux because I found the principle that I basically could do everything I wanted (possible with software solutions) without any limitations (like with Windows/Mac) very fucking awesome. I owned the fucking system.
Then, after some years, I got my first shared hosting plan! It was awesome to see my own (with subdomain) website online, functioning very well!
I started to learn stuff like FTP, SSH and so on.
Went on with trial and error for a while and then the thought occured to me: what if I'd have a little server ONLINE which I could use myself to experiment around?
First rented VPS was there! Couldn't get enough of it and kept experimenting with server thingies, linux in general aaand so on.
Started learning about rsa key based login, firewalls (iptables), brute force prevention (fail2ban), vhosts (apache2 still), SSL (damn this was an interesting one, how the fuck do you do this yourself?!), PHP and many other things.
Then, after a while, the thought came to mind: what if I'd have a dedicated server!?!?!?!
I ordered my first fucking dedicated server. Damn, this was awesome! Already knew some stuff about defending myself from brute force bots and so on so it went pretty well.
Finally made the jump to NginX and CentOS!
Made multiple VPS's for shitloads of purposes and just to learn. Started working with reverse proxies (nginx), proxy servers, SSL for everything (because fuck basic http WITHOUT SSL), vhosts and so on.
Started with simple, one screen linux setup with ubuntu 10.04.
Running a five monitor setup now with many distro's, running about 20 servers with proxies/nginx/apache2/multiple db engines, as much security as I can integrate and this fucking passion just got me my first Linux job!
It's not just an operating system for me, it's a way of life. And with that I don't just mean the operating system, but also the idea behind it :).20 -
Client: can you fix the slider on my homepage please?
Me: It seems to be working just fine
Client: it works but it’s not how I want it, fix it
Me: well what do you want me to change then?
Client: don’t change it, just fix it!
😒2 -
Boot up/shut down(different os edition)
Windows:
......eh?....
......zzzz......z...eh?
......
.....
....hold up.....zzz
....eh? Oh right!....
......z.....ok ok I am here...what?
....z...zzzzzz
Mac OS:
........
.......
..eh?
...ok I am here wtf u want?
Linux (most distros)
....snores coke...what?I AM HERE LETS GO MOFOCKA
-----shut down
Windows:
Still eating glue...
....glue....glue....glue...
WINDOWS WILL UPDATE WHE...whst are you doing with that pillow shshuahahhaah..x___x
Mac OS
.....
..ok fuck u bye whatever
Linux (most distros)
Ok bye xoxoxo talk to you lateer
**dead**32 -
Confessions of a Programmer
#1
If a client is an unbearable asshole during the initial communication, I look for every excuse to pad on the hours for the estimate to get paid more. If a client goes above and beyond in their douchbaggery, I tack on an additional $40/hour.
#2
Sometimes I will present an elaborate solution to a client, but really I'm just reading off the features of a plugin or library I'm going to download or buy after the call. Not because I can't build it myself, but because I'd rather spend more time on other/my own projects.
#3
Clients assume because I know one language, I know them all. Rather than turning down the work, I take a crash course to work in that language, or outsource the work and clean it up afterwards, whichever is more practical at the time.
#4
I use cPanel on a dedicated to manage our client websites. I'm not paid enough to bother with setting up everything manually.
#5
Certain projects I build have a 3-day backdoor built into it. If the client doesn't pay upon completion, a unique hash triggered as a GET variable deletes a core file in my work, rendering the work useless. If it wasn't triggered by the 4th day, the file allowing me to trigger this backdoor is removed. This is only used for clients where the project must be launched on their servers, or if there has been a previous issue collecting payment.
#6
I slip in the initial contract that all preceeding phone calls will be monitored and recorded, and that they acknowledge the recordings are admissable in court. This has saved me from losing money twice now.
#7
I have never used an IDE. (I know, I know, it's really inefficient and dumb, but I'm just more comfortable with Sublime. Plus I often find myself mobile and without my computer, so I have to program from my phone.)
#8
Each day resembles a betting spectacle of which work will be late, which will be rushed out and which will never see the light of day.
#9
I have used "sick" and "family emergency" as an excuse to just sleep in far more than I can count.
#10
When a client from hell crosses over the line in their conduct (such as getting very nasty and personal, or sending threats), I anonymously report them to the BBB and on RipOffReport.21 -
Client: Can you build a Snapchat clone but better?
Me: I’m going to say probably not logical given the resources they have and what we have, but for curiosity, what kind of budget do you have?
Client: $2500.
Me: Get out.7 -
[Thursday afternoon on a call...]
Client: Before we get started, can you create a sitescape outlining all of the pages and sections of the new website?
Me: Sure! I'll go through the website and shoot you a full layout in xls format as soon as possible, that way you can easily make notes on what you want added, modified or removed.
[Two hours later...]
Client: Hey, did you build that sitescape yet?
Me: Actually, I've been on back-to-back calls with other clients.
Client: So when are you going to get it done?
Me: Well, I have to go through the current website in it's entirety, which I'm guessing is about 1,000 pages. I have to determine which pages work fine on their own, which need to be combined for better presentation and which should be removed due to redundancy. That's something that is tedious and takes some time to complete. That, in combination with having an existing work queue that I need to fit you within and being at the end of the work week, we're looking at Tuesday morning to have it ready.
Client: "Existing work queue"? This is ridiculous. We're paying you good money to make our project your only priority. If we wanted to wait days for work, we would have saved money and paid for a cheaper service. You're already gouging us as it is! If we don't get the sitescape by end of day Friday, we're going with another company.
Me: I would tell you that I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but I'm not. I'm not going to feed you a line to make you happy. I'm also not going to work on my days off just to rush something out to you. You hired us because you wanted things done right, not quickly. Your current website is the result of not focusing on quality, but by how fast you can deliver it. We don't work that way. We only build quality products.
By rushing your project, not only do we alienate our current clients, affecting our reputation, but we build product of less than the highest quality. That will upset you because it isn't perfect, and it reflects poorly on us to use it in our portfolio.
If you want to hire someone to pump out this project to your unrealistic deadlines, be our guest. But you paid a 50% non-refundable deposit, so not only will you lose money, but your end product will suffer.
I'm going to let you sleep on this. If you decide tomorrow that another direction is the way to go, we wish you luck. But please understand that if we conclude our business, we will no longer make ourselves available for your needs.
Please find the attached contracts you have signed, acknowledging the non-refundable deposit, as well as the project timeline and scope, of which a "sitescape" was never originally mentioned or blocked out for time.
I hope that tomorrow we can move forward in a more professional manner.
[Next morning...]
Client: My apologies for yesterday. We're just very anxious to get this started.
-----
Don't let clients push you around. Make them sign a contract and enforce it whenever necessary.7 -
Client: I want you to reverse engineer this piece of software!!
*posts some link to an exe on altervista along with some unrelated crap*
Oh and "I PAY"! (Because you can't even take that for granted anymore these days.)
Me: Alright, I'll look into it but I'm not a reverse engineering expert so don't expect too much.
*Closes Facebook*
Client, day after: Hey have you looked into it already? Have you finished it already?! HEY, RESPOND ALREADY!!!
Me (thinking): YEAH AFTER 1 DAY AND NO PAYMENT DETAILS WHATSOEVER, I INSTANTLY DROPPED EVERYTHING JUST TO PLEASE YOU, FILTHY RAT SACK!! You fucking wish, motherfucker. Down to lowest priority you go! And if I don't feel like doing it, how about I just drop your request and tell you to suck my fleshy snek, HOW ABOUT THAT HUH? Fucking piece of shit 😤12 -
based on true story
> delivered project on time
> giving good performance
> boss noticed
> gives appreciation
> raise in salary
> profit2 -
My wife took the kids to the mall.
I work from home.
me: fuck yeah, I'll be able to work now, since I focus a lot more when there's a lot of silence in the house, looking forward to this coding session
me: *takes the fattest 2 hour nap*
I guess I was tired...8 -
My prof suggested me to use matlab instead of Python for my project.
So I started learning and found out that in matlab ARRAYS START FROM 1.
Wtf!
I am going back to python8 -
So this other senior dev got seriously ill a couple of weeks ago and the project he was working on was assigned to me. His code was so aesthetic, loved his work, the structured code helped me a lot in meeting the deadlines. He returned a few days back and now the company has given him two weeks notice because "his pace is slow". I am frustrated, PM is frustrated. The guy is such a gem that he is still helping with all the new requirements client is throwing at us.8
-
This kind of bullshit advertising is the reason everybody thinks we can do that every new whimp of the client within a few minutes.
Fuck off! Making real custom websites/apps takes time, planning, design, coding and testing. Its not just pressing a few buttons.
Translation: Make a website? 30 minutes.
14 -
Client: [sends design as a tiny, badly compressed jpg] "I need this site done by tomorrow"
Me: ok, can you send me the psd?
C: "no, I don't have it"
Me: ok can you send me the images you want on the site?
C: no
Me: what about the text?
C: no
Me:.....
C: I have to go to bed5 -
Sending a well typed professional email to your boss, but receiving a:
Sure thing
Dave
Sent from my iPhone9 -
Downloaded a merely 27.2MB file. Download stopped at 27MB.
Oh did I mention it took 10++ minutes? 😭😭😭16 -
Got some customers not paying their bills?
Play russian roulette with these projects on the prod. server:
# [ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf /<path_to_project> || echo "*click*"9 -
How to get your long time pending payment?
I stopped the website and then client told me that website is not working and asked me to check what's wrong.
Me: Your cloud server has been disturbed by the recent cyclone, and I won't fix that until I get my pending payment.
Got all the pending payment instantly.2 -
A group of Security researchers has officially fucked hardware-level Intel botnet officially branded as "Intel Management Engine" they did so by gathering it all the autism they were able to get from StackOverflow mods... though they officially call it a Buffer Overflow.
On Wednesday, in a presentation at Black Hat Europe, Positive Technologies security researchers Mark Ermolov and Maxim Goryachy plan to explain the firmware flaws they found in Intel Management Engine 11, along with a warning that vendor patches for the vulnerability may not be enough.
Two weeks ago, the pair received thanks from Intel for working with the company to disclose the bugs responsibility. At the time, Chipzilla published 10 vulnerability notices affecting its Management Engine (ME), Server Platform Services (SPS), and Trusted Execution Engine (TXE).
The Intel Management Engine, which resides in the Platform Controller Hub, is a coprocessor that powers the company's vPro administrative features across a variety of chip families. It has its own OS, MINIX 3, a Unix-like operating system that runs at a level below the kernel of the device's main operating system.
It's a computer designed to monitor your computer. In that position, it has access to most of the processes and data on the main CPU. For admins, it can be useful for managing fleets of PCs; it's equally appealing to hackers for what Positive Technologies has dubbed "God mode."
The flaws cited by Intel could let an attacker run arbitrary code on affected hardware that wouldn't be visible to the user or the main operating system. Fears of such an attack led Chipzilla to implement an off switch, to comply with the NSA-developed IT security program called HAP.
But having identified this switch earlier this year, Ermolov and Goryachy contend it fails to protect against the bugs identified in three of the ten disclosures: CVE-2017-5705, CVE-2017-5706, and CVE-2017-5707.
The duo say they found a locally exploitable stack buffer overflow that allows the execution of unsigned code on any device with Intel ME 11, even if the device is turned off or protected by security software.
For more of the complete story go here:
https://blackhat.com/eu-17/...
https://theregister.co.uk/2017/12/...
I post mostly daily news, commentaries and such on my site for anyone that wish to drop by there
19 -
friend: so how are we gonna do this project together? download, edit then upload to google drive again. thats the fastest way.
me: how about git?
friend: what?
me: ill just create a repository and create branches before we merge it with master. no need to go through that process of downloading and uploading multiple times
friend: not sure... what... that.. is.....
me: oh we have a looooong way to go, ill guess ill have to teach u git right from the beginning12 -
Haven’t been on here for ages, but I felt like I needed to post this:
Warning:
This is long, and it might make you cry.
Backstory:
A couple of months back I worked for a completely clueless dude who had somehow landed a contract for a new website for a huge company. After a while he realised that he was incapable of completing the assignment. He then hired me as a subcontractor and I deleted literally everything he had done and started from scratch. He had over promised and under explained what needed to be done to me. It took many sleepless nights to get this finished with all the amendments and I had to double my pricing because he kept changing the brief.
Even after doubling my prices I still put in way too many hours of work. At one point I had enough and just ghosted the guy as I had done what he asked, and when he submitted it to them they wanted changes. He couldn’t make the changes, so I had to. He wouldn’t pay me extra though. I decided it wasn’t worth my time.
A couple of days ago I heard from him again. He had found another subcontractor to finish the changes. He still needed a few things though, so he promised me that I would get paid after fixing those things. I looked at the few things he had listed in our KANBAN and thought it was a few easy tasks.. until I opened the project..
I had my computer set up to sync with his server because he wanted everything done live and in production. So I naturally thought I would just “sync down” everything that the other subcontractor had done.
Here is where the magic started to happen.. I started the sync and went to grab a glass of water, and it was still running when I came back. I looked at the log and saw a bunch of “node_module” files syncing - around 900 folders. Funny thing is; neither the site nor server has anything to do with node..
I disregarded this and downloaded the files in a more manual fashion to a new folder. Interestingly I could see that my SCSS folders had not been touched since I stopped working on the project.. interesting, I thought to myself..
Turns out, the other subcontractor had taken my rendered and minimised CSS file, prettified it and worked from there. This meant that the around ~1500 lines of SCSS neatly organised in around 20 files was suddenly turned into a monster of a single CSS file of no less than 17300 lines.
I tried to explain to the guy that the other subcontractor had fucked up, but he said that I should be able to fix it since I was the one that made it initially. I haven’t replied. My life is too short for this.8 -
I have a client (a friend of a friend of a friend) who came to me to build them a "simple" booking solution for their home cleaning business. Easy enough, I first thought.
Having taken a deposit based on my initial quote and contracts all signed, roll on exactly 8 months to where I find myself today.
It turns out, there is no cleaning business as the business will be totally reliant on the website. The original goalposts have now been moved to a completely different fucking country. The (now) required functionality has STILL yet to be finalised (I told client I'm not writing another line of code until EVERYTHING has been mapped out and made crystal clear), as every single face-to-face meeting / back and forth email turns into the client requesting hundreds more brilliant, essential features that make absolutely ZERO fucking sense. And now, to top it all off and push me into writing my first ever rant on here, I've just received an email from the client this morning saying "what I would like to have is like an online restaurant live booking system". WTF?!?!?
I work from home and have only my dog for company today, so please don't judge me. Just needed to let it all out.11 -
Now I am not a web dev but I just stumbled upon Electron and envied all web devs.Seems fun being a web dev
20 -
- My client on regular day.
U can manage your tasks by your own. App looks stable and you are doing well.
- Same client when I'm on Vacation
This thing is not working, that thing is not working. This is do or die situation for us. you have to cancel your vacation plans.
- Same client after I come back from vacation in which I wasted precious hours of my vacation time and fixed all the bugs.
I didn't release your changes yet coz I wanted to release it together with you. I was like "THEN WHY THE FUCK YOU RUINED MY VACATION" -_-4 -
!rant
This dumb pretentious bitch.
We are both computer science students, she is writing her bachelor thesis, I'm in 4th semester, but have 6 years of professional programming experience.
So naturally when she had a problem implementing the MOTHERFUCKING PREPARING SOFTWARE, which she needs to begin writing her thesis I helped her.
First I started explaining every last bit of code, trying to teach her something, so that she wouldn't need my help ALL the time.
After a while I realised that this BLOODY GIRL FROM HELL acquired nearly half her credits by other peoples help, so I just fix the code hoping it would be over soon.
When that software was done, keep in mind, I coded nearly 90 FUCKING PERCENT OF THAT SHITTY ASS PIECE OF CRAP SOFTWARE, she asked me to also "help" her implementing a generator for samples she could test the software with.
Naturally at this point I said I'd be busy with own projects etc. And declined.
So now, nearly 1 Month after she didn't talk to me, THAT ARROGANT PIECE OF SHIT WANNABE SCIENCE BACHELOR asked if I could help her with LaTEX.
At first I was speechless. How could she have that amount of balls, asking me that. As I only am a ranting asshole inside, I declined in the most polite way.
WHAT THE FUCK! I HOPE YOU WILL FAIL YOUR THESIS AND ALL THE 12 SEMESTERS YOU STUDIED WILL HAVE BEEN FOR NOTHING, THUS SENDING YOU TO LIVE ON THE STREET WITHOUT MONEY AND DIE A HORRIBLE AND LONELY DEATH SURROUNDED BY BEGGERS TRYING TO STEAL YOUR KIDNEYS!
Sincerely,
Me.14 -
Client: We need this site up and running by the end of the month.
Me: Ok we need them to send creative over. Please provide it in Photoshop format.
.... A few days before due date.
Client: We have sent you all the creative. Please see email attachment.
...... Opens attachment. Creative was created in PowerPoint.
FML!! I CANNOT BELIEVE!!!
*starts twitching*5 -
A while back a co-worker of mine fucked up by leaving some debug code and pushing to production.
He quickly repaired it, redeployed and everything was good again before the customer experienced any issues.
Later that day, management showed up by his desk to ask what happened, how it happened and stating that he was not "angry enough" about his fuck up, long after it has been repaired.
Up to this day i regret not asking in what unit of measurement we could determine if we were angry enough; decibels? gray hairs? grams of shit in my underwear?4 -
One day with a lot of hours trying later:
Got an OpenVPN server running from scratch and can (still have to write the actual authentication code) accept or refuse clients through a php script ran from a bash script with a username and password.
Fuck yeah!15 -
Worst experience with cs profs? Oh boy....
Databases lab: "You'll need to work of this snippet, if your IDE tells you it's deprecated you don't need to care about it"
If you want to imagine the quality of the code base we were expected to work upon just think about that attached xkcd comic, basically an undecipherable black box.
The instructions where at the same time micro managing everything (he gave us frickin variable names to use, and no good ones, no the database connection had to be called datbc, yeah very descriptive) and yet so obfuscated that I'm not completely sure he didn't resurrect Kant himself to ghostwrite for him.
He also didn't like us to use any Java feature that was to 'modern', for example for each loops since "they offer no benefit over normal for loops".
Further, everything we wrote had to be documented with a relationship diagram and a uml. So far no problem if he hadn't invented his own flavor of both (which can be read about in his book).
Oh, and he almost failed me because I used a lambda expression in his 'code on paper' exam and this "arrows are a C command" I "must have been confused"... which is glorious coming from the guy who can't get operators and commands straight.
1 -
When you get a client from real MOTHERFUCKING hell.
You just really FUCKING want to say this:
Scorched earth MOTHERFUCKER. I will massacre you. Now SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME DO MY JOB.
First, take a big step back and literally, FUCK YOUR OWN FACE.
I will rain down an ungodly FUCKING firestorm upon you.
You're gonna have to call the FUCKING United Nations and get a FUCKING BINDING RESOLUTION to keep me from FUCKING destroying you.
I am talking SCORCHED EARTH MOTHERFUCKER.
I will MASSACRE you.
I WILL FUCK YOU UP!
But for your own sake you keep it at this:
Yes sir/ma'am :).7 -
Thanks Windows 10. You were working for the most part and now thanks to your update when I hit WinKey and start typing 'down' I get 'Download and install braille' as the first match. Or as Windows 10 calls it 'Best match'.
16 -
Just came from a one week holiday, only to come and see that zesty security and some other repositories are no longer supported on my 17.04 ubuntu...
Updating to 17.10 now..
Havent even booted up my windows laptop yet.. God please give me strength..19 -
Customer logic - "We'd like a website but we don't know what we want...so can you do a whole thing so we can change 80% of it day after day until we are bored of it? Thanks"4
-
Client: "Something is missing, like a type of BOOM or some fancy stuff, but I can't pinpoint what exactly. Do you know what I mean?"
Me: "Sure, give me one sec."
Changes font of a single word on a Web page to italic.
Client: "Perfect!"
My face: Priceless and trying not to laugh out loud.3 -
!code
I literally cannot get this computer to boot from ANYTHING other than its hard drive.
I want to boot from a usb flash drive, but the bios doesn't support that. it supports standard and 120mb floppies, ZIP drives, usb floppies, usb cd drives, etc. but not a generic USB drive. You'd think the bios developers would have heard of them back in 2012, but they also refer to Windows as "window os", so who knows.
I changed the boot order multiple times to include everything that might possibly include a usb flash drive, and then just tried all of the other options as well. No luck. Everything just booted straight to Windows.
Okay, that's not exactly unexpected, so I found a boot manager that allows booting to usb drives, and burned that to a cd. I made sure the boot order included "CDDRIVE" first (and "USB-CD" second just to be sure), and tried again. The bios refused to boot from the cd because it's in a cd/dvd drive, and cd drives are VASTLY different beasts than dvd drives, apparently. Like, it didn't even ask the drive to spin up! It just booted straight into Windows.
After a few more reboots (and quite a few middle fingers), my dvd drive magically appeared in the list of allowed boot devices. Why did it just show up now? No clue :/ I'm just happy it's there.
So, I pick that, save and exit, and wait for my shiny new boot manager to pop up. The cursor flashes a bit, moves around, and flashes some more. Then Windows starts loading.
what the crap? why?
So this time I disable booting from the hard drive altogether. In fact, I disable everything except the dvd drive, because screw this, and save/restart for the twelfth time.
Windows greets me.
Again.
What the hell?
At this point I'm tempted to unplug the friggin' drive. If Windows still greets me after that, I'm just going to check myself into an asylum and call it a life.
But seriously.
Either the boot manager in question is triple-faulting and the bios is transparently failing-over to the previous boot config (Windows), or said boot manager is just like "yolo!" and picks Windows anyway.
If a different boot manager doesn't work, I'm totally out of ideas.
Edit: disabling HD boot entirely and removing the boot manager cd also results in Windows loading. It's like the bios is completely ignoring my settings. :/16 -
Holy shit i've found my father's old books back from the 80's for basic and comodore 64. He learnt from thoose and used to code a lot of games and office softwares on that old beast. 😮
1 -
Me: ok, we're 4 days from launch, here's the most up-to-date version of the app, and here's what's been added since yesterday.
Client: ok, looking good, still needs a little more here and here.
Me: yes we've made note of that an-
Client: oh ya, and that thing that's been in there since day 1, take that out.
Me: oh, ok, we're gonna need so-
Client: and that thing we specifically asked for, take that out too.
Me: that's fine bu-
Client: oh, and add a fucking Christmas wreath for them to jump through. -
Developer: Changes are difficult from here, are you sure this is how you want it. 🤔
Client: yes. 👍
Developer: ((3;"'&}×π{sk*[=¶^[|) ☕😴
Client: Oh, actually can we have this too and maybe remove this bit because we don't need it now thanks. ☺️
🤐🙃🔫3 -
This startup I started working for with their shitty code base written by interns, restrictive sys admin who had no actual use in the company since I was the one setting up their servers, know-it-all CEO, stupid HR representative who used to grill employees for being 10 minutes late in the morning, very small apartment "HQ", using fingerprints to signal our entry and our leave to and from the office, no formal process, and, to top it all, monitoring our own laptops which we use for work with a software that takes screenshots every few minutes. In short, it had the worst in corporates with the worst of startups combined in one company.
If, hypothetically, we could overlook all this, I couldn't overlook the horrible smell this place had. The apartment was overlooking a small garden which was a home for many stray cats and dogs. You can imagine how horrible this smell was. The weird thing was that no one there seemed to really care about the smell!!
I lasted there for only one week before I gave my resignation and I believe I had every right to do so.3 -
True story.
Some clients (especially in India) don't want to pay, but they want everything to be implemented in the project.
Big data.... Check
Machine learning.... Check
Deep learning..... Check
Espresso maker.... Check.
They want all the buzz words that are buzzing to be put in your project and they want you to put it in the 'cloud', for which you have to pay.....10 -
Wife ( working from home; to husband ) : how many whistles did the pressure cooker blow?
Husband : How am I supposed to know? I don't know!
Manager ( on Skype ) : Three! I heard three whistles!5 -
My CTO in the 'good old times', when he still talked to me and shared his wisdom, once told me what I should know about oop and explained me the world of programming and what really matters:
CTO about oop and C#:
"I think this object orientated stuff is overrated and useless. You don't get finished. I write everything in one file. You should do that too. The fastest way is always the best one."
So, dear readers, you might think, he maybe understood, what oop means. I have to disappoint you. He is as FUCKING STUPID as he sounds.
He didn't understand the whole concept of the language C# or oop.
He doesn't use properties, every single method is static void and there is nothing like an object.
Since there is more from where that came from, this will be continued...7 -
Been working on this project for a month now. Everything is going fine, meetings are short and to the point. But then...
Client: "I'm leaving the project, this is the new person taking over."
Me: "Hello new client."
New client: "Burn it."
Me: "Uhm, what?"
New client: "Throw what you have away. It doesn't meet our new specifications. We're starting over."
Me: "Ok..." 🙃🔫3 -
It has come to my attention that people like to read!
Specifically, I mean that a lot of ranters like fiction.. :D
I've been trying to decide on something to write for a while now, and I think I have it..
"The Traveler" (name open to suggestions)
The Traveler is a magic-based fantasy where our main character travels between world's using ancient stone portals (think: Stargate) and uses her unique powers to play god.
Each world she visits will equal to a different story, and she might play a good or bad guy (or both) depending on what the world has in store for her.
Her powers will include my WIP magic system from RISE, as well as some extra querks that aid the flow of the story.
I may still work on RISE, and I will keep in mind that The Traveler and RISE come from the same universe (I think RISE will be a prequel to The Traveler, and tell the tale of how she got her powers, and the origin of the portals..)
Let me know your thoughts below! ^~^34 -
Client: We want to onboard people with sign-up wizard just like (Massive Industry Leader) so remove the sign-up process from the app.
1 week of development later...
Client: We need to take photos of their information, but we think its easier to take photos on the phone so once they sign-up link then to the phone.
Me: How will they get the apps if it not in the app stores?
Client: Get the apps approved for the app store! duh!
2 weeks later... 4 failed app submissions..
Client: Would it be easier if we just add the sign-up on the app?
Me: Yes... like it was 3 weeks ago?
Client: Yes! Why did we remove it?
Me: You did in an effort to be more like (Major Industry Leader)
Client: ....but we're nothing like them! Change it back!
Me: >•<!!!
I have to fire my client...3 -
Congratulations? For fucking what. So you built a wix website. Now youre a web developer and the whole world knows it, my services aren't needed anymore.
Congratulations you bypassed half a decade in 50 hours a week of coding, then you have the bone and fucking marrow of emailing me because your like buttons are causing users to create a new instagran account. Good one kid.3 -
I met a rather talented developer some time ago that is highly proficient in C# as well as React and Angular for the creation of web programs.
Dude knows the ins and outs of C#, has been working on it since the early stages of ASP.NET.
I am always intrigued as to why certain people chose certain languages. When I asked him, he admitted to being very lost during his early days, and somehow settled on C# because of the file extension being cs, which made him think that it was the proper Computer Science programming language, get it? because of CS?
Now a days he does use a wide variety of stacks and languages, and he keeps up to date, not one of those "I don't need to learn anything new!" types of developers, the dude is absolutely l337, but i keep thinking that such a talented developer had such a funny start.5 -
Maybe this is my retribution for participating in yesterday's rant about public transportation.
Saturday morning, I had an 🥚and 🍌. I was happy.
I went out to meet with my GF.
I got a window seat on bus.
The seat on my left was empty for few stops.
A mudafucka big kid came and sit beside me.
I was like, cool, heyyo kid. Not some greasy old dudes or ready to slap chicks.
Oh boy can I be wronger?
The mudafucka big kid started with right butt scratch using right hand.
Then followed up by left butt scratch with left hand.
And then did a wiggly body scratching using his seat like an alien snake.
I got itchy looking at him.
Also I said big two times because he spread his big thighs so wide it took 1/3 of my seat.
And now playing loud ass games on his phone.
Not a good sign for my Saturday.1 -
Seen on HackerNews, couldn't left it for myself.
Mail loop from hell: https://blog.dbrgn.ch/2012/7/...2 -
Client's API returns a very weird response that changes its structure depending on its content.
When a array field has more than 1 children it returns:
{
"field" : [
{ "name1" : "value1"},
{ "name2" : "value2"}
]
}
So far so good. However, the fuckery happens when it has 1 children:
{
"field" : { "name1" : "value1"}
}
WTF! So the client API can return either a JSON object or an array and we cant trust the specs they gave us.4 -
*In the final weeks of development with a project on a short timeline because the client "needs it".*
Client: "We've hired a consultant we want you to work with."
Me: "Okay, can we push this to after the delivery?"
Client: "Of course"
Wake up to an email from the consultant with a list of scripts he just ran on the production database server for the currently live app.
Get follow-up emails about bugs and app crashes from the client.
My rage is so hot it can keep warm an Eskimo tribe over the winter season.2 -
Client has a hand drawn logo. Which is really bad.
We build a website with the same concept.
Client keeps telling us the website doesn't look sophisticated enough.
How do I tell them it's the childish logo?8 -
I work at a school and am involved in building the new website. Specifically as an ex Web developer myself I am acting as intermediary between the leadership team and the company we have hired to build the site. The company has a "the customer is always right" approach and will do what they are asked for so my main role is stopping the school from making stupid requests.
For example yesterday they complained that the site looked different on mobile compared to desktop. Then they complained that the (long paragraph) welcome message appeared below the menu and quick links on mobile instead of above them (forcing users to scroll down to get to navigation controls). After many more complaints and mind boggling suggestions, and my attempts to explain responsive design and reducing cognitive load, I left the meeting with a headache and an urge to spend the next three hours drowning Lara Croft.
The most difficult part of any developers role: not throwing the keyboard at the client every time they say something stupid.1 -
Finally moving from godaddy to digital ocean for my personal projects.. lets hope I get the desired results 🙈9
-
Client asks for website and budget very low and wants a form with dB. Think WordPress site is a solution. Build site.
Deliver site.
Client's IT team unable to deploy on server. They blame me for bad "code".
I have to go to their office and help them deploy on local machine using WAMP.
2 days and 100s of calls later, website installed on test server. Works fine.
All is well1 -
Clients always add up:
- The time it took you to create the project.
- Enhancement times.
Client: "How are we still working on this a year later?"
Me: "Well motherfucker, you requested a change recently. It has nothing to do with the original request, nor the last 39 updates."
Like it's my fucking fault you keep changing your mind.3 -
Has any of your clients asked you to disable inspect element and right click on webpages to protect their COPYRIGHT images from being downloaded...19
-
After 1 month of not writing a single line of code in some language, I'm like ehhh: youtube -> tutorial (any programming language) episode 0 😰2
-
Howdy my binary friends and those who identify as an attack helicopter or an Amiga 500, I was away from devRant for about 2 weeks or 4 because I had to order a new touchscreen (who cares anyway).
Have I missed something on devRant?
Let me just freshen up my dictionary with Alex's rants, be right back.20 -
Z2: 3GB RAM
Z3: 3GB RAM
Z3+: 3GB RAM
Z4v: 3GB RAM
Z5: 3GB RAM
Z5 "Premium": 3GB RAM
X: 3GB RAM
X "Performance": 3GB RAM
ZX: 3GB RAM
Sony.. Alright...3 -
That moment when you change your mindset from "I'll probably leave the office by 6pm" to "I hope I'll leave before midnight"1
-
Got a ticket form a client reporting a calculation giving the wrong outcome.
In return I ask her what she thinks the outcome should be and why.
"The right answer because I said so."
Yeah thanks that's going to help a lot. -
When project is finished, everything is according specs, and on final review the client says: "everything looks nice! But I would like to change just a few small details. I would like a different design and functionality".
Seriously?!
1 -
There's this huuuge project I was a part of for half a year. I was kicked off along with a few dozens of other devs (>60% of total manpower) a while ago for particular company reasons.
Now the remaining devs are oh-so-enjoying their time there..
1. workload has not changed
2. deadlines have not changed
3. no one will have Christmas-NewYear vacation
4. a new k8s-based infra is scheduled to roll out to PROD on Dec 23 (k8s is still far from ready - might need a few more months)
The most fun part is that it's not client's mgmt who has decided for #4 -- it's our own....
Boys.. Girls.. Save yourselves.3 -
Retarded client sent us 25 minutes worth of videos of "bugs". Guess I am getting cancer after I watch them. The way he works on PC, the mouse movements, the speed, ...are just magnificient. My stomach is getting more and more sick each minute passes. Pray for my health.22
-
Got my first serious project about a year ago. Made it clear to the client that we are developing a Windows app. After around 80-100 hours of work client just goes "how about we make this a web app?" Got a "financial support" instead of the agreed payment. Got around 4 times less money than agreed upon. They never ended up using some parts of the software (I ran the server so I knew that they weren't using it)
I once had a nightmare explaining to the client that he cannot use a 30+ MB image as his home page background. Average internet speed in my country is around 1-2 MB/s. I even had to do the calculation for him because he couldn't figure out the time it took for the visitor to load the image.3 -
Having to use home PC because your office PC takes a millennia to train a classifier. Why not just work from home?4
-
[...] great! Nice to hear from you that you've got experience using C#! Our shipping company will also need a mobile interface for our IBM AS400 relic older-than-the-pyramids server, can you do that?
Me (a little displeased about the idea of working on a pre-existing legacy server): yes sure, I'm working on a Android project right now, so I'm learning a lot about it lately, I think it's totally feasible
Them: oh, but we are using a windows mobile device
Me (wondering why they are still using Windows phone): I can look it up and let you know btw
> Windows Mobile /= Windows Phone
> Deprecated since 2010
I'm fucked.
4 -
Clients that add you on Facebook and start asking at 3 AM how their project is going.
No this is my personal life, how about you get lost and call or email me during working hours. -
"Coding is free dude, why are you charging me for that when I can just use Google to copy-paste code from there and there, boy.. think about it"
-- Typical Client5 -
Client wants a webapp where every label on all form inputs are configurable, even the fucking login form ("Login" and "Password" text)
They also want it to send emails where the message is configurable too (they can insert your own HTML)
so basically they want the entire fucking webapp to be configurable, all without requiring any code change.
I could use a "configurable" torture device right now.9 -
Here's an even meaner prank. Make it just a tad more difficult on them.
Set chrome in kiosk mode, so they can't switch out of the browser.
Unfortunately 'Alt + F4' still works, but they'd have to know that ahead of time.
And then kill off `explorer.exe` so they can't press the windows key.
You can either set this up as a bat, or you can do all of this from the Task Manager.
```
chrome --chrome-frame --kiosk "http://fakeupdate.net/win10/"
taskkill /f /im explorer.exe
```
And to really piss them off, set it up such that every time they reboot it just goes straight to the update screen
You can set Chrome to run as the Windows shell instead of explorer.exe. Just set the registry
```
HKCU\Software\Microsoft\Windows NT\CurrentVersion\Winlogon Shell =
[chrome path]
```5 -
Wake Up. Cook. Eat. Work. Clean. Meetings. Work. Eat. Work. Netflix & Chill. Sleep. Repeat. 😎😝
How does your Work from Home look like?🧐
9 -
Not exactly a co-worker, but one of the devs from the client's team spent a few months working in our office next to us. He would always take a nap at lunch time and snore loudly, and eat an apple afterwards and it seemed to be impossible for him to chew with his mouth closed.
Whenever he had a cold and his nose got blocked he would still force himself to breathe through his nose, so it sounded something like a mix of darth vader and someone drowning.
He also lacked any notion of personal space, and would always sneak behind us to ask questions and then put his laptop right on top of our keyboards or in front of our screens and start talking while we still had headphones on. -
A few weeks ago a client came to us asking for edits on their site. They had a developer in their office but they fired him a few days prior. After some looking at the piece of garbage they called a website I told my supervisors that it was built in Adobe Muse and from what I could find in a few quick searches it's shit and I didn't want to learn to use a shit tool. Apparently as a company we decided to hire a freelancer to handle this despite the fact that we didn't build the site and the client isn't paying for maintenance so I'm not sure why it's our fault.
Fast forward to today:
I've been in the office for 19 hours straight trying to learn how to use Muse and fix the client's site because somehow the freelancer managed to delete the mobile version of the site. When I ask my supervisors why I'm fixing and supporting a site we didn't build and don't have experience working in and the response is: we're presenting the client with a $50k proposal and we need all the good graces we can get.
Unless I'm gonna see some of the commission it doesn't really matter what we charge for the site, I make the same whether it's a free site or a $100k site.2 -
A few years ago I was working in a startup where the designer was given way too much decisional power (he was friends with the owner).
He had a tendency to keep editing parts of the design during the development phases, so when we had to work on a new big section of the application, before starting the tront-end development, I asked him to confirm that the mockups were final.
He confirmed the design was final and was not going to change.
10 days later, of couse, he sent a new, completely different, set of mockups. The startup owner expected the new design to be implemented without moving the deadline.
(I left that startup shortly after. The issues with the designer were just the tip of the iceberg.
The owner tried to keep a payment hostage to "force" me to sign a new 1 year contract. He backtracked when he thought I was recording the call. I got my payment and left.)1 -
I need to invent time travel so I can go back to Friday morning and slap my past self for thinking that Linux From Scratch might be a fun weekend project. I should've gone to bed four hours ago and instead I've been shouting at LLVM.
It really makes me appreciate the hard work that Linux distro maintainers put in to keep all the pieces up-to-date and compatible with each other. I already want to put my fist through my monitor and I'm only trying to maintain a single virtual machine.12 -
Client doesn't have any idea what pages/links they want for their website. Same client told me to call the guy who recommended me to him for the project brief...wtf...I mean WTF!!!
5 -
Le Mail: bla bla \n \n Sent from ...
Le me: I DONT DUCKING CARE!
WHO fucking thought that anyone‘d care ?15 -
I'm here at work working on my back end security code and my co-worker is watching the Emoji Movie.
I'm strongly against censorship, but this goddamn piece of cock shit makes me almost reconsider it. Noise canceling headphones are about the only thing keeping me from going that far.
//end rant
18 -
Work from Home was not the cup of tea for most of us before Covid-19. 😱
Some really love working in the comfort of their home like your oh-so-lovely HR and some are scratching their heads like your beloved Project Managers.😂
The Designer is loving his space. 😍
Tester is enjoying some good naps in between the working hours. 😴
and... What do you think programmers would be doing? 🧐
Well.. well.. well.. Programmers don't really feel any change. Coding then and Coding now. 😎
How's your Work From Home Going?
4 -
Renting a flat above a kindergarten.
I hate Christmas songs and I am very sensitive to high pitched noises.
It's a bad time in the year to be working from home...3 -
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
...
I am currently facing a client from hell. I don't even wanna write down the shits she is giving us. This lyrics are just prefect for my scenario.6 -
I really start to lose motivation to work when working from home..
I find myself watching YouTube videos for 4-5h a day instead of working..
Still get my sprint work done but man, it’s so boring after a year at home..8 -
Going out to London for my second week of vacation. Hope it doesn't rain much and your beer is as good as you claim it to be. 😝10
-
Flipping client is checking my website work for them in an old version of internet explorer before I've even tested and having a go at me!
** Stick to your own job arseholes ** -
Sometimes your music app knows just the right song to play.
Story:
Production program was working (has been for a long time). But suddenly it starts failing. I spent a long ass time trying to see what went wrong.
Problem:
Security update on the server 🙃
Now I've got the client, his minions, and the users emailing me to fix this. But I didn't start this fire!
Song: We didn't start the fire, by Billy Joel -
Receive several documents of blog posts from a client, each one titled "Blog $n - $category - $title." Cool, the client gave them to me in order and I just have to plug them in.
Enter blogs on site starting with Blog 1.
Client sees the blogs on the site and loses their shit. "I specifically numbered the blogs so you knew what order to put them in! How hard is it to put them in numerical order? Blog 1 is the newest blog and should be first on the page."
The site displays the newest post first, but because any normal person would have named the oldest blog "blog 1" and counted up from there the blogs are in the reverse order the client expected.
What the hell kind of dense motherfucker numbers their blog files in a manner which requires them to rename every file each time they write a new blog post? -
Spends 5 days working from home at my desk.... Stressful week...
Spends weekend playing diablo 3 with son at same desk.... Relaxing...
Wife says I need to get out more.... *looks outside* raining...3 -
left the office early today to see my 2 years old son before he goes to bed.
it's 11pm and I'm working from home, gonna wake up around 5:30am to commute to work.
I really need to move closer to work3 -
Are any of you guys sentimental about your early programming efforts? I still have my first few simple Python programs on my computer, from years ago!
print("hello world")8 -
When a company operates like a startup but they're over 10 years old and they try to do the micro brew lunch thing and be "casual" but they pay you like shit and the boss is a moron.2
-
"I would like my site to be harmonious with a garden "
- real client quote
(I quit that job shortly after)3 -
so... 9 years ago we had this super awesome codebase. 1 file, complete logic COPIED to be used in ui and service/daemon. I scrolled to the middle of the file and there was no source. it was out of bounds of my monitor to the right because of nested ifs. ok... what the fuck!! the worst part: I had to implement a new FEATURE into this mess. 2 days. I said it would not work as expected because the feature was not thought through. but project said let's gooooo! ok there I was, a junior with an impossible to implement feature and a codebase from hell. I've implemented something, all night long. next day it was the problem of the consultants. they called me, I told them why it's impossible that this would ever work, they understood and talked to the customer. he accepted the solution. WTF?! anyway, in those days I thought about quitting developing software as my daily job....4
-
I'm freelance and I work from home, despite being repeatedly told however my friends have no problem calling in for a cup of tea and a chat in order to stop that work. As a result, I've got to work late to make up for the lost time they've caused me during the working day.
I'm sick to death to explaining this to my friends who just don't understand that I "work from home," and that "I am not home from work."9 -
I can't stand talking to clients on the phone!
One of my first freelancing clients used to talk to me for an hour at a time. I really wish I could have billed him by the hour, it took him twice as long to explain anything and then I'd have to get back in the mindset for what I was working on. The phone is just so disruptive.
I'm so much happier working for a company where the project manager deals with the client's and product managers.2 -
You are a developer and you will only log time you're actually working. This means you will not be logging time spent in meetings, chasing for specs, requirement clarifications and similar. You must log 8 hours each day.
^^-- wtf?!? Is anyone else working in similar conditions?12 -
Dear client,
If you provide me a PDF file that you name a design, and don’t provide any info I can’t do much with it.
So I got a PDF design for the program I was building. I tried to rebuild the elements and copy your photos. As you said this was the only file the designer had. But don’t expect me to look for your fonts, sizes etc. And then complain that I need to be more specific in the design... and sending me by once do I need to ask her something?
Just f*** off -
So I'm a freelancer celebrating my second year at this one client (yes, times are good). When I first got to my current (not customer-facing) project, lots of "externals" (other freelancers) had come and gone, "internals" had been assigned and reassigned to and from this project and nobody knew exactly what was in the (angularjs) codebase.
One of my first
"quick win" assignments was to see if load times could be reduced. After some looking around it turned out someone had used moment.js (with locales, 67k gzipped) for some feature that had since been abandoned... and then accidentally dropped it into the source folder, checked it into source control (svn!), from whence it was happily packaged by the CI job and released every month.
Removing it reduced the pre-render javascript by about 40%. (also yes, that said "nobody knew exactly what was in the client-side codebase")16 -
I think my manager has this false impression that just because we are working from home, we suddenly are gifted with lot of free time.
In my experience, the work life is horrible like this. I have not seen much day light in the last 2 weeks.
I don't know how long i can stay sane like this.16 -
Serious question: why all the hate on PHP?
I've been using it as my main language, and genuinely like it. Tried Java but find that to be typing a fuckload to get the same task done. Javascript is nice, but still, i prefer PHP (probably mostly because i know it).
Just really curious, what have i been missing?14 -
Companies should understand the fuck that working from home doesn’t mean we are available 24 hours a day. For fuck’s sake let me eat in peace...7
-
Never believe that you have the benefits of a work from home internship, with stipend; and the comfort of your home.
Indian parents be like, "Beti bachao beti padhao; beta dhaniya lao pudina lao"...
Which translates to, "Save daughters, educate daughters; son go bring dhaniya and pudina from the market"...
Dhaniya and Pudina are some vegetables, whose translation I don't know :P2 -
I'm currently working on a feature that no one likes. Everyone knows that it will be removed soon because the users won't understand it, but it still has to be implemented due to client-side Management madness.
Good thing: the contract with this client expires in 3 weeks :) -
An old one, but funny af. Shows the pain freelancers have to go through.
Please design a logo for me.
With pie charts.
For free.
http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p.html1 -
I’m getting fed up of working from home. I now get changed in the morning and wax my hair to feel like I’m going to work, even if I have no team meetings!2
-
First day back from holiday: after 30 minutes of work (excludes start-up, catch-up etc.) The P.O. (product owner) comes to me
Telling me I needed to switch project, ok I thought at least they switched the project from what ever it was to a propper OTAP street while I was away
Few tickets later the P.O. asked me if tickets x could be deployed to our test servers as well as production.. (note the ticket was already merged with our develop branch and he wanted only that single ticket x to be deployed)
WTF is the point of a OTAP street if you're going to deploy it to every server type at once?
So day one after my holiday I already needed to fight the P.O. again
At least I wasn't disturbed during my vacation... Witch is a first.8 -
What the fuck is clients' problem? This woman comes to me after one of the last bids I saved and spent on her stupid task! She asked me to come on skype and I said I didn't have the ID and maybe we can go ahead with a phone call or whatsapp call or even Google hangout! She stopped responding to my messages when I had sent her 3 options! It's not like I was willing to back out but hey, I DON'T FUCKING USE SKYPE ANYMORE! What a waste of my precious last but one bid!
15 -
Management has bequeathed that it shall hit prod tomorrow, the developers cry 'but it's not ready`. Hush little dev for tomorrow we hit another payment milestone
-
There is a colleague of mine who is loud, arrogant and thinks he knows it all. Except when I worked closely with him turned out he doesn't know shit. And he has been in the industry for over a decade! Why the fuck was he hired, I don't know..
-
I have been growing this creepy stache for a month now. I am hoping the "not fitting company culture"-ness of it will steadily attain me work-from-home privileges.
If it does fit the company culture, I am fucked in more ways than one.3 -
Repost from Reddit, i will probably do another with certain color theme, i just prefer this to be 'dark' build as it is how i initially immagined it.
I plan on expanding with certain micro pc, as server, 3d printer and some true hifi.
Suggestions?
14 -
I love when teachers know nothing about technology and when something closes, or in their mind “their pc breaks”, they hit a bunch of random buttons or keys and make it worse.2
-
Today I got a message from a potential client. See following excerpt:
Me - "ok I'll need you to give me a brief before I can send you my quote."
Potential client - *sends me only a screenshot from the damn App Store showing an existing app with the desired features*2 -
When you want to write to the client "how are you?" but your auto correct knows your feelings and you send "how dare you?" instead....
-
I remembered one time my freakin prof in programming taugh us how to understand computer language, that time my worst enemy is ASSEMBLY, for some reasons my teacher doesn't know how to code in assembly like wtf?
On our last grading period he asked us to create a program using mov and shift and the deadline is set tomorrow after he announced it.
I remember my code in that freaking subject
MOV COURSE
SHIFT SCHOOL
HAHAHAHA after that I was scolded big time 😂 -
To all those working from home...
How do you keep yourself motivated to stick to a schedule?
I've been at this for 7 months now; it was great for the first 2 months, now I can't seem to get my ass together.
I still get my work done, but that's the problem.
Because I'm not motivated to stick to the schedule I've made, I'm chipping away at my non-work time to get the work done.
Any advice?7 -
Am going through documents and found an old review on a paper I wrote in semester 1. Now, I wouldn't say my paper was either good or bad. There was not enough guidance provided in the unit and I was unfamiliar to the scientific asshole community so I tried my best.
But in particular, fuck reviewer 2. He doesn't understand basics in English and he has the audacity to make judgement. Like, I am not "misspelling" you moronic asshole who doesn't even know the difference between American and English spelling.
He wrote three fucking pages. This moron wrote about half the length of my paper about why my paper is shit. I hope he chokes on shit.
He goes on to why every figure was useless or wrong; How no section is related to another; How everything is either not explained enough, or explained too much. The audacity is what he suffers from throughout the review.
In conclusion, and given the contrast between reviewer 1 and 2, I'd recommend reviewer 2 goes on to fuck himself. Moronic bastard.
It's a pity that I know this will happen again in future. God this makes me so angry. Gah.5 -
Since few days I’m sick. Literally, I look like shit and feel even worse. Some combo disease with fever, diarrhea and things like that. And despite that, I tried to work from home today. And surprisingly - I’ve made everything I planned to do: 100% PHP multi process server, which sends push messages via GCM and APN, emails and SMS (using different operators API and talking AT commands directly to modems). I’m a bit proud of myself. And now I feel like I’m dying, so it’s time to get some pills and take a looong nap ;)3
-
I didn't know "bandwidth" can be so hard to understand even after 2 hrs explaining..client still wants widgets with autoplay videos..God why?4
-
When a PM or other self proclaimed demi god decides to tap the shoulder of the programmers with headphones on just to look just above their head and say "oh, i see. a programmers thoughts do throw a nullPointerException when disrupted"1
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Tracking status of an item from a Kickstarter I backed. Shipping to me in the US. Yeah, that should be here any day now.
7 -
Magento 2.
If you've worked with it, you know why.
If you don't know why, do yourself a favor and keep it that way.7 -
Best client I have ever experienced. Kappa
So, I got job to recreate one old website, because the old one was incredibly fucked up. She told us, it was made by someone retarded.
The code was fucked up even more than UI. It was definitely written by some kind of idiot. Diacritics, mixed languages, no OOP, no FW, just copy&paste. Yeah copy and paste for every page.
The DB was another level of shit. Inifine is not enough to describe it. Column names with whitespace, diacritics, uppercase, lowercase...pure hell. Yeah and I had to import it.
Whenthe new website was ready for testing I got an email from her that it was her who made the website... HER!! Fucking hell, no more of this please!1 -
I am currently working as a consultant and I like it. It also makes upset/happy/schadenfroh (not entirely sure how I feel about it) when we tell the client what work needs to be done in which order and why just so they can throw it all overboard and we do it the way they want it and it bites them in the ass a few month down the line.
They hire us for the external professional experience that we bring, so listen to us. We did this before, we know what works, and we know way your way does not work.13 -
A while a go, we got a Feature Request by our client, which was a bit of a stretch. and by a bit of a stretch i mean horrible shit which is totally unusable, a technical nightmare to implement with almost no accessable data.
well, the pm gave me the Ticket. when I First read it, I wanted to puke.
since the pm wasnt in a good mood, i just wrote a large comment on where to implement that Feature to be a much less pain in the ass.
many discussions with the pm and the Client later, i Had to implement it the way, they wanted. so i started.
after one and a half week, i was almost ready, just a few hours left and the nightmare would be over
what i didnt know is that the Client came over to discuss a few things with my Boss
suddenly my Boss walks in and asked, how much im ready
then He told me THE message
i should should Revert everything ive done the last 1 1/2 weeks and implement the Feature the way, i told was better
worst friday ever -
Today I had my first ever prod db fuckup due to too wide where clause in delete query. Spent 8 hours restoring service. It's 02.09 now and I'm finally home, going to bed.
Interestingly enough I've enjoyed this experience... -
After previous rant (https://lynkz.me/9xAFVZ9) he told me to be as close as possible to the design from the designer. There was on the left side a BarCode, which made no sense. So I didn’t add it. Now today (saturday) he told me I need to add the barcode because it looks classy. I told him we had a QR code already with same data. His anwser, yeah but it looks better with Barcode added too. Just f*** off! Your classy, shitty barcode will have a great price as it’s weekend. Thanks @linuxxx for the url shortner, it’s awesome!9
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I just asked a client if he wants a contact form instead of just writing down an email address on their contact page.
Now I'm trying to explain to him how building a full blown CRM is outside the scope the business website we agreed to build.
Lesson Learned: Never make suggestions.3 -
I really hate when I have to work on something wrong. I mean, the client wants to embedded a third party service on their website, using iframe. Then, they want us to change the layout and behavior of the embedded page. And well, no matter what, I have to do what they want. Great job.
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Public Service Request to Users from Tokyo and those with good knowledge in buying keyboards.
Which retail shop sell tenkeyless mechanical keyboard such as HyperX Alloy FPS Pro? With English words not Japanese 😬
I can't find it at my country and my gf is currently at Tokyo for a training, so.
On further note, I'm looking for a keyboard with following requirements. Would appreciate your recommendation.
- without numpad
- standard qwerty layout (US/UK)
- backlit (any color, as long as keys are visible in dark)
- USB wired
- easy to clean and maintain
- must last for more than 3 years9 -
If you were forced to not use an electronic device for programming purposes ever again, what would your job be?
For example, I'd study medicine and try to become a surgeon.14 -
Past month I had been working on a JSON hierarchy construction from flat rows returned by query where some bugfuck had introduced pagination for some damn reason, I never gave a flying duck to this till I get a email from one of the clients who supposedly made a complete hierarchy and my endpoint wasn't returning some hierarchy after some levels.
Frustrated that my service layer there is a bug, I debug to realise only certain rows are getting sent back from the query and ebullient from this fact , I put the bug on the DB person and walk off for a smoke.
After a smooth drag , I realise while closing the email on my phone that this client had entered 10 on pagesize which would indeed just return 10 rows. *Facepalm* I didn't even need to debug all this and now I had to a face a db person I just plastered a bug on. BAHHUMBUG2 -
One of my friend is wanted to build his site. Like other extra smart customer he did his share of research.
With half an hour of explaining why I am charging more than other. He said okay, and said he will be at my place tomorrow.
Me: why?
He: so I can watch you?
That single demand of his, made me pissed off. I wanted to punch him for that but anyway suggested him,
he should look for other vendor.2 -
So there seems to be a lot of discussion lately about the closing of background apps on Android. Now, I expect a decent amount of disapproval from this, but I happen to be one of those people BECAUSE I've experienced that it drains my battery more to have them running.
Since I genuinely trust y'all quite a lot compared to how much one should trust the internet in general, I'd like some more proper and reliable info (or as reliable as it can get) on this. If I'm indeed wrong I want you to convince me.9 -
UI bug is found to only occur in Firefox.
Director sends mass email telling dev & qa to only test using IE11. -
Waiting on a baby girl in a few weeks from today! Excited! Scared!
Any other future/current dads with babies with tips on how to handle a work from home with a baby?6 -
I got my domain from Swisscom (Switzerlands "T-Mobile") Every damn time I try to renew/adjust the domain it feels like I have to search for the fucking Higgs Boson. Searching for it on DDG only yields wrong results. Domains are hidden deep within the business part of their homepage. Their buisness site barely mentions domains, the login is somehow tied to an account you would normally use in combination with your phone number which only adds more to the confusion and the whole domain thing seems to be a shitty frontend coverup of someone elses service.5
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Boss asks if the project will be finished today, I reply ‘yes’ and then realised I’d not pushed my code after working from home the previous day! Doh!1
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Everyone I know chilling and shit.
As a developer and having the ability to work from home I am being pushed more than usual and I think it is because of no commute time I am working more now a days.5 -
This happened about 2 years ago. My colleague at work, who's a kind and smart soul was actually yelling at the phone. Before that nobody had heard her yell at anyone, let alone a client.
The history was that she found out that the client sent her falsified official documents and she confronted him about that, so the idiot client started laughing then yelling that she had to be 'on his side' since he hired us as consultants. That's when she started yelling.
How can anyone be so cynical?
This is also our job to save your moron ass from your own stupidity.
If she didn't found out and the documents sent to the government there would be a lot of trouble for everyone especially the client.
After that we all comforted her and told her she did right. Unfortunately the client wasn't fired (a friend of the boss) but of course we all declined to work with that client again.1 -
TL;DR The "senior dev", that the client hired on their end, is acting as a middleman between me and the project requestors. Taking the credit for my work.
I've already bitch about this before. I've been in a crusade to defend the production server from this fraud for a long time now.
But most recently he has removed me from all meetings with the actual project owner. I create the solutions, then he goes through them to understand it a bit. He proceeds to present it to the project owner in a way that almost blatantly says that he made it.
I'm sick and tired of working with this asshole. He is literally useless, worse he is slowing things down and breaking others.
I'm just gonna begin countering this... -
Because of you great people, I installed Linux (Kubuntu, latest) again on a device after roughly 4 years, just to see how things are... 3 application crashes, 2 errors with no details just before I was able to install Chromium 😂 oh boy, hope the updates that crashed Discover fixed some of it 😌8
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Working from home once a week, it's my most productive workday by far. No annoying interruptions; well except for my cat who insists on being in my face all day (but honestly, I can live with that).1
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Hey guys! So I just woke up from a dream in which I was talking with skilled programmer and he gave me awesome pro tip which I'd never realize exists!
But it was my dream so my idea. I have no idea how the f*ck this works but it's awesome. Is it just me or ?3 -
My company just pulled the trigger on wfh. They just sent out an email saying tomorrow's the last day any of the offices in the region are open. Come in and get your shit. See you on teams.
Most of us have been working from home for a while anyway but there's been a few holdouts wondering why no one's coming in. It'll be interesting to see their reaction. On teams. -
So the bus I get into work has been cancelled and my office manager said I could have the day off but I had some important stuff he needed me to finish so I remembered I had TeamViewer installed on my work machine so I'm going to be working from home today4
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My boss gave me the task of rewriting the app to Next.js from regular react app, I've been procrastinating for a while now....2
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I spent the week working on an adapter to a specific format, the client came this morning to tell us Json would also have worked. Then why didn't you tell me earlier?!?
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!rant
I just had the weirdest dream ever!!
I dreamed that PHP is like cancer: It eats you slowly from within and eventually you die.
And the weird thing is that I use PHP for a project..
Maybe it's a sign?😱2 -
I've had enough. I can't handle those bad designs layouts anymore. It is getting on my nerves to receive designs from "professionals" that don't think about responsive layouts, correct alignments, grid, vector shapes, use 6 different font families, and have graphics placed in the most wrong places.
Oh, and let's not forget that such design should be coded in 15h. Sure dear client. Keep dreaming, idiot. -
I have some people trying to access to my accounts from far away.
I think my password have been leaked :|
f*ck6 -
So, I work as a sysadmin junior (6 months and going), and in the past few months, I learned what my boss warned me about - Devs don't understand us admins, and we don't understand the devs.
We have this huge client who is about to migrate to our company (We do mostly server managment/Housing/Renting), and I am so gald I don't have to work on the migration myself!
Just hearing what the company devs say makes me facepalm: No, it won't work. It cannot work on just 3 machines (They use like... 20 in total), no, we won't get rid of our docker swarm, that's essential (Doing the absolute minimum in their infrastructure, just a fancy buzzword to lure people on. Though they've spent like 2 years developing the app that uses it, so they my not want to give it up).
I kid you not, once, they replied to an email that contained the phrase "To be afraid of/worried about" something during the migration, that something could break, not work, be unstable. 7 times.
Might not sound as bad, but it was a rather short mail, and when they're so afraid of everything, its kinda hard to cooperate with them.
My colleague literally spent this entire week mapping out /their/ infrastructure, because they were unable to provide us with the description themselves.
And as a cherry on top, they sent us a "graph" of relationships of all the parts of their infrastructure that was this jumbled mess of rectangles and arrows. Oh, and half of all the machines were not even in the graph at all! Stating that "We also have all this, but I really don't know how to ilustracte the interactions anymore"
Why do companies like that exist? If you build an infrastructure yourself, shouldn't at least someone know exactly how it works?1 -
I hate touchscreens!
Far too often, nothing at all happens when "pressing" a "button", and when something happens, it's not at all what you wanted, it's like touchscreen devices have a will of their own.
Maybe touchscreens will evolve and actually become useful in the future, with a technique for reading input that works for everybody and not just for the majority, and with tactility, i.e. through 3D morphing of buttons, switches and wheels, controls that you can grab, feel and hold on to.
Till then, I'll dismiss touchscreens as the toys they are, no good for anything serious.5 -
Having a look at electron again after giving up on it months ago.
I must say, the documentation has improved a lot since then, and it looks---dare I say---intuitive to use?
The electron api demos app is surely some help, but I'm not really all that sure how much it lives up to its name. It doesn't really demonstrate anything, and it doesn't cover the whole api, just small chunks of it.
Loving the event system though!12 -
So this horrible client micromanaging every single thing in the application now suddenly asking me where a menu should go! I'm like why are you asking me that now I think you should take the menu and shove it up your ass?2
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Not a rant, positive news instead. Finally after 2.5 years of searching I found a new job! Especially after a interview that I thought went south very quickly. Ended up with an offer 30 minutes after the fact.1
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Ups and downs in devLand.
Day started with a meeting with one client. Guys, getting told "thank you" and "I appreciate your help" feels so good. Nothing could bring me down.
Then I get an asshole making the same request that we already went over -__-
Seriously, how many emails do I have to send. Sigh. -
Just in case I didn't remember when I started working from home, I have a quick way to look it up.
1 -
I Work from home for like twice in the quarter
And of course, on the day I happen to be at home... my neighbor starts drilling holes into his walls at 9:20 am3 -
Going over some NodeJS code, and I feel like the scene from "Dude Where's My Car" - "And then....And then..."
Coming from almost three years of 99% python, this hurts my eyes so much1 -
Me when a client who will listen reason insists on me sending files as email attachments in .zipx format. :(
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After days of work we finally deployed a finished project to integration for the client to test.
Client calls... They decided to use a different technology. Project is cancelled. Wat? -
Before I started working, I used to feel like I depended on documentation and the internet a little too much owing to ultra crappy long term memory. After spending some time at my internship going through code written by "professional developers" several years senior to me and trying to write unit tests for it (surprise: the code was in production without having underwent any sort of testing), I feel like the amount of time I spend online reading usage recommendations, alternates for optimisation, best practices for writing clean and descriptive code and all that is a lot more rewarding. Some bad things help you feel good about yourself.
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Everyone: Keep people safe and work from home!
My power company: We were going to turn off your power for maintenance but now we won't to help people work from home.
Also my power company today : Hope you didn't need your power to work from home. Good luck with that.
🤦♂️1 -
!rant
The joys of returning from my annual leave..
My contributions after just being back from a 7-day leave.. 27 in total.. PR's, issues, bug fixes, feature fixes, requested features,..
Feels good tho.. It was a productive day today and we made the weekly update! :D
( Yes, I pushed commits while on vacation :D )
2 -
Monday Morning...
Open up new client issue ticket...
“I want my site to appear on the first page of Google. I know only about 10% of our sales come from our site, but it’s importent that we appear professional.”
Well, start by proofing your ticket and the other 500 typos I found in the content you sent me, sir. -
So I developed this proxy server that will throttle down API calls to one of our providers so we don't get blocked for TOS violation...
Some dude had a tool running all day long which crashed 2 minutes before I left work.
This literally ruined my day until I recalled it's all cached!!!!
Mood is back again and I deserve my beer! -
I worked for 16 hours straight without any break because client kept me on call with screen sharing on and asked me to solve all the bugs from last 6 months of coding because he wanted to go live next day.🤕
Ps: I was the only developer and the only tester of that project.1 -
Part 1
https://devrant.com/rants/954253/...
Sooo, a follow up...
I talked to HoIT last week and he could see the issues, both on how my boss manages his team, but also a clear lack of resources.
He promised that I would be promoted in a some months.
Today, we had a talk with a broader audience. And everyone agrees that the current situation is unsustainable and we should do something now.
I expected HoIT to present his vision, with me as the lead of a new team. But... Nothing...
I tried to suggest the model, using his own words so he might remember.
Nothing...
Sooo anybody in need of a Team Lead/Architect around Frankfurt, Germany?? -
Lost my changes twice now. First time was my own fault. Was in a hurry to pick up my son from daycare so I checked in my code and locked my computer before the code was actually checked in. So today when I took "Get latest" somehow my last code from yesterday vanished. So, I rewrote everything, but now there was some problem with service references, and building the solution failed. A colleague had a look into it, but he couldn't resolve the problem neither. Instead he accidentally made an undo changes on my code, so now my code is gone again. And the solution still doesn't build. I'm just a *leetle* frustrated right now :(3
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Traveled South East Asia for 1.5 months and now getting back to work!
What did I miss? How many new JS frameworks are there now? Did AI replaced us yet?1 -
I moved house yesterday and now it's been around 27 hours since I last used my computer.
All I want to do is create but my setup is in boxes in another room and it's 5am.
Why must motivation strike at the worst times?2 -
Ok I don't know what ticks managers off about working from home.
I live an hour away from the office and my team (i.e. The whole company) consists of 3 people, INCLUDING ME. And we all work on different projects. So what's the point of even going to the small room with cubicles AKA the office? No, there aren't really any "learning from my colleagues" crap; we work on different stacks. Plus we're all juniors. Oh yeah, haven't I mentioned that? WE HAVE NO TEAM LEAD OR EVEN SENIORS. The CEO has a tech background and he communicates with us directly and discuss the requirements etc. BUT HE LIVES IN ANOTHER FUCKING CONTINENT. So, again, what's so bad about working from home in my case? My manager doesn't like it for some reason. -
Fucking monstrous specifications!
What do I need 4500 pages of specification if half of the defined behaviour is specified as user-overridable and every fucking blithering idiot that has only read the cover page defines behaviour for his system just slightly different.
'Oh the specification lists 999 ways to structure data, but I don't wanna be mainstream. I want an egyptian hieroglyph at the end every 42nd data item received'
So many things are already standardized, just use what is already there and don't re-specifiy the wheel. How hard can it be? -
Playing around with a POC I'm doing for work, and it works so well I got an IP ban from one of my favorite websites for a massive amount of requests they got from me
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FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUCK
So yesterday following Java class i went to my next class everything went well (or so i thought) and in my next class my phone blows up with notifications (changes in grades notify my phone) i look down and my Java grade goes from an A to a D in seconds and i was just so confused, after he finished grading it goes up to a C but i was still confused. So the next day I go into class and talk to him about my grade and he says, “you never fix your projects so why would i grade any of them, i’ll just give you f’s” to which i responded, “i am confused what i’m doing wrong (it was a few simple projects where i had to make shapes with stars for example a triangle) my outputs are correct” and he responded with “Oh well i can’t help you” so now i have a C and i did everything right but of course because it wasn’t his way it was wrong.
he just makes me so mad, when a student asks for help who decides to respond with i can’t help, he can but he just won’t.
Fuck him.5 -
Hate it when clients told you a specific requirement but then changes it the last minutes. You can't justify or argue. Can't do nothing about it but only follow. Just a high paid slave.
Example:
Client-verbal: background color of all 5 pages
Me-with email verification: ok. I will bg color of all pages will be red based from our last meeting.
Client email reply: ok
After a few days
Client: I think we have misunderstanding. What I meant was 4 pages red only. The 5th page should be maroon.
Me in my mind: wtf. Of course I can't argue but just agree and follow. The demo is near and he'll just inform the last minute. I will not win this argument.
Also, there are no acceptance criterias in the user story.6 -
Hello all (App devs) I have finalized all APIs and here is the postman collection for you. I have been working on the chat page so excuse me for my delay but I finished all the system all that is remaining is the chat. I will be working on it tonight.
Please let me know if there is anything wrong.
Dev 1: thank you will see then asap.
Dev 2: why do u want to make me lost we said u deliver the chat first and then we move forward with the app.
Me: well I had some difficulties with the chat so I finalized all else and u can fix those while I fix the chat
Dev 2: no this is not what we agreed on. This is propostrous. I will not do anything anymore. I need the chat to finale x y and z.
Me: dude the chat has nothing to do with x y and z u can finalize those and then fix the chat!
Dev 2: no I don't understand this is not right.
Me: dude I built the backend I know what u need for x y z. Anyway why all the blame and the destructive approach?
Dev 2 don't think we r kids we r not kids .. (bullshit talk)...
This is the scenario that happens Everytime a pussy of a Dev is late and is ignorant of their job and all about blame it on the weakest point.
Therefore guess what's drafted ?!
MY RESIGNATION PAPER!1 -
So, Our company called us back to office after 8 month.. and reason was our boss is giving.. You guys may be work on bed.. It is bad for your back.. Here we will provide you better working enviornment and please do carry your laptop to office :P
But I think its okay to work from office.. Once I was excited to work from home. But dude you can learn from the person sitting next to you, discuss things around,, can see what others are doing.. Its a progress. At home you are just u and laptop :)
Personally I think its better to work under someone superior obvious he/she should be technical and egoless.. then its more fun.3 -
I hate when clients think they're always right.
Yesterday this client showed up saying that he had an emergency on computer, because after an update all icons turned white. When we told he the situation and that all data was lost, he begged to retrieve all the info because he needs it to work.
He was affected by ransomware, something like Fantom, and not only all the files are encrypted but also the backups.9 -
If your manager asks you to write a raw algorithm based on raw data in order to properly structure, sort and filter that data, how long do you take on average to complete said task?
Example:
Here's a text file with a bunch of continuous data like: john doe 5555 my street 123 karen wiscott 12347 her street 22 peter wright
..and then you first have to start identifying boundaries for each data entry (which is a task on its own, with comparators and shit), solve its bugs.. then you have to make sure it's properly getting sorted.. sort those bugs.. Yeah, it just takes a long time for me to figure all that out.
It takes me 4-5 days on average since I'm a junior but managers expect it to only take 1-4 hours.. madness..4 -
Scope creep is so great. I love it when someone wants to add something to a request that has nothing to do with the request, and will only be used MAYBE once annually. /s1
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!dev (kinda)
Warning: Might contain (be) stupid rambling.
So I got my new toy and want to play around with it. Just in case I have to return it I first want to make a full disk backup, so I try to boot clonezilla. I press the power button and mash F2, F8, F9 - and it boots straight into the windows setup. Nope, not what I wanted. Try again. And again. Eventually I look it up and apparently I have to hammer the ESC key to get where I want to. Alright, now it works. Boot from USB. Failed. Try again. Failed. Check the BIOS, disable secure boot, reboot. I need to type 4 digits to confirm disabling secure boot. Alright. Reboot, try again, failed. Secure boot is on again. Wtf? After some more infuriating tries I see that NumLock is disabled. AAAARGH. BIOS: Enable NumLock on boot, disable secure boot, enable legacy boot. Input the 4 digits - works! Try to boot from USB: Failed! Grab another USB stick, did the clonezilla image, try again: Finally! It! Works!
Format disk, install Qubes OS. Success!2 -
I have an opportunity to speak to a large and well mixed group of web designers and developers plus _clients_ of designers and developers. Part of what I want to cover is what affects the client/professional relationship and project(s) in both positive and negative ways. I want to include your (dev/designer) real world perspective on that. So, please share a positive and/or negative client behavior or experience that typifies how hard it is to work with some clients and/or easy it is to work with others. If you have a solution that works well for bad situations, I’d love to add that to my presentation as well. THANKS!7
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So I currently work at my first job and have for 2 years now. First project I had was to redesign a user info set up page. Didn't know any of the languages so kinda had to just wing it. Anyway finally committed my code and tested on dev server. Then code pushed to production and tested there. Then I saw a message from one of the top devs saying nobody could login. I replied saying that I was able to. Well, I actually ended up making it to where no one could log in except me. I learned real quick to never fuck up like that again. Surprised I wasn't fired on the spot.1
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I want to build a blog. Which language do you recommend me to use? Which is better and why?
I know MEAN, Rails, PHP... But I just can't decide which one to use. I don't wanna use any wordpress-like app (joomla or any other thing).
Thanks! :D10 -
Hate it when the devRantron Mac client app doesn't support copy and paste. What devRant client do you use? Web, devRantron or mobile apps? Thanks!
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Beware of Open XChange web mail client! It's so utterly buggy that when you empty the deleted mail folder, you lose all newly created folders as well...along with any of their content. INCREDIBLE CRAP!2
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Trying to figure out the use case for a random stackoverflow question.
Well ...
At least they are honest, I guess?
-
Oh, joy, another meeting. Because nothing sparks joy like discussing the same issue for the umpteenth time.
Can we code a solution instead of talking it to death? My keyboard's getting rusty from all this meeting-induced inactivity.
Time to wield the power of Action Items and break free from this endless cycle!1 -
That feeling when your clients are very well aware that you're away on holiday but they still try to contact you to work on some last minute edits on a project.3
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I feel if there is an app like focusmate.com for developers where the developers like me who are working from home can join and work together. If there is already one, let me know3
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So a client is apparently ignoring my request for payment to continue the hosting services for their blog ( which has been inactive for a long time ).
Thinking of getting rid of the client. I wouldn't mind if they voluntarily left because they don't want to pay, but now it's like i have to force them out.
This is going to be a rope walk. I wouldn't want their few hundred followers coming after me.
Any tips?9 -
Vinegar didn't work, time to test honey.
Let's see if autocomplete is nice enough to persuade some of these mongrels to evolve from dogs to chimps and actually document the code they write.
1 -
It took me a month's time to adjust to working in co-working space last year and it took around similar this to adjust to working from home this year. Both working environments have there own pros and cons but somehow we all find a way to continue working.
Don't know what working environment lies ahead of me once this lockdown get's over but I hope I adjust again in similar manner there too :D -
To work from home, I recently bought an internet connection at home. It has pretty good speed and is affordable for the base plan. The speed is around ~ 35 Mbps. Never had that fast internet in my life.
Now I have this sudden urge to buy a console and start gaming. That would require me to also buy a TV screen. So I'm now dealing with a temptation that would cost me atleast $500 in total.
This corona better stop soon...3 -
Colleague put this up on their team's channel today :
" I'll be working from home today, ad hoc task is in review, will be opening a PR for backend changes [ ... ], yesterday was mainly spent on setting up gcp on my local and fixes towards gcp deployment. "
Wait, what? did you just set up the entire GCP on your local [machine]? I wouldn't mind giving you a whole week off if you needed it; if I were your manager.3 -
I'm usually really productive when I work from home. At my Seattle gig, I worked from home 3~4 days a week (most of my team was in New York City anyway). My current company does not do remote work well, and I've been terribly unmotivated. Our useless manager took the entire week off to work on his house he's trying to rent out.
I'm usually not one to worry or panic or even check the news, yet I've found myself doing that all the time now.
It's been very surreal. -
How do one see very old rants from their profile? I think it is limited by default Neither navigator nor pagination at the very bottom.7
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Doing office even when it's vacation day today...
Not because I am a workaholic or there is work pressure from company...
But because I like doing my work as a developer and it's quite peaceful and fun to code for some hours rather than idling around at home figuring out how to kill time especially during this lockdown period...
P.S. Planning to find some time to learn from online tutorials too in the evening 😁2 -
Is NodeJS + Express + Sequelize enough for an Enterprise app from scratch. Or should I use other Node frameworks like AdonisJS or NestJS?
Frontend will be Angular 9. Database will be MySQL. Thanks!12 -
Recruiter got tired of me being not interested and just went ahead with a friendly reminder of a previous email with credentials for some test so we can move ahead with the process... talk bout some balls
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Everywhere now there is a work from hype, so I wrote one article on my blog. Hope everyone can read and relate , to same. Shiver being working at home .
Check here
https://tekraze.com/2020/03/...
Will write one more article with pros and cons specific to company/employee.
Thanks10 -
!rant;
if (!me && !someoneiknow && (MusicThatGetsMeInTheZone === true)) {
https://soundcloud.com/dubdogzmusic
}
The 100k mix is really nice. Thought id share :) -
!=rant
So, my company wants to use MadCap Flare to build our help center. This project is a nightmare so far. I've been trying to push for some better alternatives for down the road. Any recommendations? Preferably a
Some sort of free open source framework. I've seen a couple of developer friendly CMS frameworks pop up lately but just want to get a consensus from my good devrant ppls. -
My team and me nearly finished a big new feature for our website.
I am a junior dev and this was the first big thing I was in charge of and now that I see how it unfold I feel really bad.
It consists of php backend (integrated into a 20 years old monolith) and vue frontend (punctually jumpstarted by a clusterfuck of typescript files included into php rendered html) and especially the frontend part looks so bad.
Vue is relatively young in our project and almost nobody has a clue about it. I learned so much about vue in the process, but the result is a behemoth of awfulness that grew over several months.
I have a really strong desire rewrite the whole mess, but I will never be officially allowed because it works and practically all the flaws in our code base are subject to the classic
"well, someday, somebody probably has to do something about that, but for now let's start this shiny new feature"
So for now I think about doing it secretly and pass it to my buddy to review it. I guess chances are high that not even the colleagues in my team (apart from my buddy) are going to notice, since they aren't as interested into vue as I am and don't have the overview over this features code as I do, but on the other hand it feels like something I could get in trouble for and apart from the cursed code base my company is great.
Have you ever bin that disgusted by your own production code before it was even one year old?3 -
!Rant !Promotion
As I read some Devs rant they are out of job, thought to share something that came to my inbox.
Company called Toggl is hiring
Check https://jobs.toggl.com
They have some test online to try and most of all jobs are work from home too.
Try checking them out -
Hey guys! Can you describe some of the problems y'll are facing with virtual meetings because of WFH??20
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Is it possible to disable laptop original keyboard from within windows 7? My keyboard just gave up on me.Been trying to install ubuntu but my keyboard's not working i can't use the arrow keys nor tab..:-( .I am thinking of attaching my ext.usb keyboard when i setup boot.For the record the original keyboard has keys that auto clicks so very frustrating.Help guyz.4
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