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It was between me and another guy.
I fucking won!
I GOT THE FUCKING JOB!!
I'll be a junior Linux Support Engineer in a week or so!
OMG OMG YAYAYAYAYAY100 -
Train conversation between 3 girls:
A: "Oh, I've got 4G.. "
B: "What, we have 4G!?"
C: "OMG I HATE 4G!"
A: "Yeah, it's almost as slow as E"
C: "I know, right?!"
.....
Kill me pls16 -
Me: Sometimes I talk to myself while debugging.
Me: OMG 😱, me too..
Me: Lets try pair programming next time.9 -
My worst developer sin is probably me talking sh*t about programs I could never have done better myself.
"Omg, this is so inefficent!"
"Omg, the ui is so confusing!"
"What kind of idiot would do that?"
...I'm not the only one who does that, am I?10 -
Last year, my company sent me to India to coordinate stuff.
Me, to my wife: "They've chosen me because they trust my social skills."
Her: "OMG, what is the rest of the company like?!"
LOL.. :-)3 -
YES YES YES YES I HAVE MY FIRST INTERVIEW NEXT WEEK (SERVER MANAGEMENT/SUPPORT POSITION)
*JUMPS AROUND* (NOT LITERALLY BECAUSE AT A TRAIN STATION)40 -
My friend: OMG OMG OMG My laptop is dead!
Me: What do you mean it's dead? It doesn't even turn on?
My friend: Nooo, it does nothing?
Me: Are you sure it's plugged in?
My friend: Yesss
Me: You sure?
My friend: Yess, it's actually plugged into a multiple socket thingy...
Me: And that thing is plugged in to the wall..?
My friend: Well duh!
Me: And did you turn the switch on?
My friend: Of course I....oh, wait!! Never mind!!!!!
Me: >:/5 -
Normal people talking:
Alice: Are you on Facebook?
Bob: No.
Alice: OMG!!! YOU'RE NOT ON FACEBOOK!? Do you live under a rock?
Programmers talking:
<Replace all instances of Facebook with github>9 -
Omg...
T-Mobile AT was asked, why they store passwords in plain text, and in a long discussion, they answered this (see img)
I don't know, if this is a late april fool...
25 -
Boss put some kind of Linux professional certification book on my desk today.
I REALLY HOPE I CAN GET CERTIFIED 😍15 -
- Free app:
"5 stars - OMG this app is awesome!!!"
- Add new feature with In-app purchase:
"1 star - App sucks balls. Why we must pay? Make free and I rate 5 stars"
I call them The Rating Terrorists.8 -
Me: *uses google chrome*
Parents: Stop, log out of everything, you're hogging up the internet, omg
Me: *unplugs computer*
Parents: *their computer still not working* You downloaded a virus to our wifi you're grounded for a month3 -
Normal people post selfies on Instagram and get comments like "omg so sexy 😘"
Developers post stuff like this in devRant and get comments like "omg so sexy 😎":
4 -
”OMG WE CAN’T GET INTERNET TO WORK! WE CAN’T DO ANYTHING! PLEASE COME AND HELP US ASAP!!!!!”
*rush over there, expecting the worst*
”So yeah, what’s the WiFi password again?”
:|2 -
OMG you guys weren't kidding. Windows 10 sucks. I finally understand why no one uses it anymore. I heard the Linux brand is very good.
49 -
*enters password*
*misspells a letter*
*OMG BACKSPACE! BACKSPACE!*
*retypes whole password again* 😂😂6 -
So the other day my mother told me that her laptop does not start. Then we found out that she holds the "power" button so long that the laptop turned off again after a few seconds after the boot was initiated.3
-
Instructor: "Alright you fresh meat, you're gonna do natural logarithm, factorial, and 2 to the power of N in C++"
My classmates: "Omg this is so hard"
Me:
8 -
Took me 2 fucking days to figure out why the loop wasn't working, biggest facepalm ever.
if(iterator.hasNext()){
// some awesome code
}8 -
Programmers as seen by me when I was 10: "OMG, they are scientists, they must rule the world!"
Now: "How the fuck... Whose donkey programmed that shit?!"6 -
Working on code that we took from other devices company. We found this brilliant thing in one of their function (check catch blok)
1 -
I take 1 day off from work, i come back finding my chair replaced by a junky one... I mean really??? f*ck this!17
-
Come to a festival they said.. .. It'll be fun they said.. Here I'm ranting and reading machine learning algorithms under a tree, while others party. Omg.
7 -
!rant OMG GOOD NEWS!!!!!!!! I only have tendinitis in my elbow causing pain in my hand, not carpal tunnel or arthritis 😄10
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I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE WHO ALWAYS BUY NEW STUFF WHEN THEIR OLD THINGS WORK PERFECTLY FINE!
FFS PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT NOWADAYS! I MEAN, FIRST THEYRE LIKE, oh we need to save the planet bla bla.... THEN THEIR LIKE!
OMFG! NEW IPHONE X WOLOLO MUST HAVE! OMG MY OLD PHONE IS WORKING PERFECTLY FINE BUT ITS THE NEW IPHONE OMG!
I MEAN! COME FUCKING ON! WHAT IDIOTS! IF ITS WORKING, KEEP IT!
#NoHomo13 -
FUCK PHP!!!
We were trying to go live with a big online shop, it is connected through a crappy API to SAP.
PHP keeps outputting fucking errors because our intern doesn't fucking know how to properly write PHP.
YEAH, JUST FUCKING RETURN A WHOLE DIFFERENT TYPE OF DATA IF THE FUNCTION HAS AN ERROR.
Oh and using fucking strtr( ... ) to insert stuff in a string is REALLY FUCKING 1337...
And when you think the whole fuckery has reached the summit, just look at how HE FUCKING CREATED THE UGLY EMAIL TEMPLATE:
$content .= "UGLY HTML ABOMINATION";
$content .= "MORE UGLY HTML";
$content .= "HTML WITH SPELLING ERRORS";
$content .= "<table>";
$content .= "TEARS OF TIM BERNERS LEE";
$content .= "<table>HE FOGOT THE FUCKING '/'";
and dozens more of these lines...
and the whole piece for ALL 3 FUCKING LANGUAGES...
Thanks for writing the fucking backend stuff, it is better to rewrite the whole piece.19 -
OmG I haTeZ WhEn PIp0L tHinK I Am A haCk3R bIcoZ of My trMinAl Lib mi alone! XOXOX
shut the fuck up.19 -
Just heard a sales girl in IT store telling a customer that some screen has much better "smoothing of sharpness". OMG4
-
OMG. I accidentally click into my own name on the Slack DM list, and what wonderful resource did I just find? HOW LONG have I been ignoRANT of this wonderful repo for my fave .gif contributions to project channels???!?!?!?
3 -
OMG it’s 4 am, and I think I made a stupid fucking mistake and waste everybody’s time. Need to check right now
*check*
Ah nah, we’re good. I am not a moron -
OMG ever since I started to love Haskell, all nonfunctional languages look ugly, I am getting worse at writing procedural code!3
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Netflix, why is your loading spinner so horrible!
Do you know what a percentage is??? 99% means you are ALMOST done. Just a tiny fraction to go. I should not see 99% for seconds or even minutes on end. Much less after the first 98% took only a couple seconds!!
Stop the lies!!!5 -
Told my junior the optimization idea i was going to say in the upcoming meeting
Fucking guy stole it and got all the claps in the evening meeting
Now i cant even look at his face.10 -
I wonder if the meeting at Rubber ducks quack association goes like this...
Why the hell doesn't my guy see the problem? It's fucking right there! Why don't you see it??? OMG! I request for a change of owner.1 -
OMG! !rant!!!!
I already ranted about the elevator at home being stoooopid for opening doors on way up when you wanna go down..
But our work elevator is awesome!
I figured today that I can play with the authorisation light with the chip for the home elevator.. so from orange to green (work card) to red (home chip) to green to red... OMG!!! Awesome!!
Also the look of horror on coworker's face was priceless (work elevators have a tendency to malfunction as it is, without me playing with them)!!! xD xD xD16 -
Assembly:
"OMG! What an unfriendly language! It's so obsolete!"
WebAssembly:
"OMG! Assembly is on the web! It's so amazing!"3 -
OMG I just accidentally deleted hundreds of hours of work permanently ... F*** ME 😱😱😱😨😨😱😰
THIS IS WHY I DON'T FUCKING USE AUTOMATED BATCH SCRIPTS.22 -
Work starts ar 9:00 am
WFO: 7:30
OMG, FUCK!! I've overslept. wtf happened.. I'll be late for work.
WFH: 8:53
cool, I still have time for breakfast!3 -
When friend trying to fix a bug for a week and then call you to fix it and you fixed it in a minute then he looked at you and say "omg how ? You are a god"
-
Ask a cobol developer anything!
Many people have heard about cobol and the attached "omg why would you want to work with that!?" But most have no clue what it's like so...
Ask away!39 -
Currently -28C. People from us be like: omg guys, it was like 40F today i thought i was gonna freeze my fingers off xD5
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*Me at class just trying to organize my directories and shit on the terminal*
My classmate: OMG you are a hacker! Can you pleas help me hack a Facebook account !!!
Fml....1 -
Omg whhhy do things change so much from Laravel 5.x to 5.4? Tutorials are useless! And Google, I love you, but giving me laravel 4 answers as top results for my query specifying 5.4 is just infuriating!!!3
-
Guy1-Have you seen the new iPhone ?
Guy2-Yeah, blablabla like Samsung
Guy1-Blablabla
Guy2-Like Microsoft
Me-OMG STFU no one cares3 -
AMAZING MIDNIGHT BREAKTHROUGH!!!
In Android studio if u disable the enable frame check box of the avd and select the graphics option to hardware the avd works a bit faster...even in a system with 4gb ram 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌12 -
OMG ... please.
Digital era 2018 - Data secuity forum.
Main topic - GDPR.
First talker talks about blockchain.1 -
Last night, I had a nightmare. After I freshly installed Debian on my laptop, i run `ls` inside root dir, then i saw `node_modules` inside of it.
OMG 😱
face screaming in fear
Unicode: U+1F631, UTF-8: F0 9F 98 B11 -
*code reviewing someone's work*
OMG! if-statements within if-statements! This is an IFception! *prays*4 -
Brain: Imagine if human live for 500 years.
Me: It'd be so awesome...
Job requirement: 100 year of JavaScript experience for junior dev.
omg....XD -
"OMG WE MISSED SOMETHING WE NEED AN EMAIL SENT TO EVERYONE IF X HAPPENS AND NOBODY DID A THING WITHIN AN HOUR!"
Ok done.
"OMG WE NEED IT SENT IF NOBODY DID A THING EVERY 30 MINUTES"
Um... not sure we're solving this problem right way ... but there you go done.
"OMG SOMEONE GOT AN EMAIL AFTER 45 MINUTES AND NOT 30 MINUTES"
Bro who the fuck knows why that happened, it's email not instant messenger .... that's what I meant by us solving this in the wrong way, email for this is dumb... how about we solve this process problem in some other way or you just fuck off ... this isn't a coding issue this is something else...4 -
make let not var
Other devranters:
LOL
MOAR
OHAHAHAHAH
OMG SO FUNNY
me:
make: *** No rule to make target `let'. Stop.7 -
Sorry for the so many jobs I didn't applied because I thought Scrum is a js framework XD omg... Actually... omg.4
-
Guys!!!!
Guysss!!!!
And girls....
when your stoned and drunk as me, please watch "This is Not Happening" on youtube....
I'm crying here of laughter...
OMG
The bear... Oh , To baad no more bozze8 -
Did you know that commenting '+1' or 'OMG I really need this, pliiz can I haz this asap?' just spams hundreds of mailboxes? Use that little star above there. It's appreciated. Thanks.
5 -
Overheard: "I'll need to get in touch with my Infrastructure Architecture Innovation Team"
😂🤣😅😂🤣😅
Why not just call them team buzzwords. Omg.3 -
All the articles about javascript fatigue lately. Omg just shut the fuck up already. Being a developer is hard, deal with it2
-
Omg, delegation to others feels like the last, most difficult skill to master. Letting go can be so hard.
Patience, me. Patience.3 -
OMG! the ancient one... amazon sells data mining book from year where not even computer existed.
FYI - if it's typo then not fixed for months
5 -
I fcking hate when my friends come to me for restoring his stupid blocked accounts like Instagram, Facebook, Google etc... OMG I'm a fcking computer technician not a hacker1
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yesterday..
- OMG ${LINUX} you work with computer? Can you fix my printer!?
I never learn to not talk about what I work with2 -
OMG!!! Arrived right before thanks giving!!! Can't thanks @dfox and @trogus enough for the awesome #devrantapp stickers!!!
1 -
!dev
Media: Facebook is selling all your personal info to the highest bidder!
General Public: “What??? OMG!”
M: Russian elections are completely rigged!
GP: “What??? OMG!”
M: The social media platform you use to argue with your racist aunt isn’t actually a good place to get your news from!
GP: “What??? OMG! No way, I get all my news there!”
M: The sky is blue and water is wet!
GP: “What??? OMG!”
Me: You fucking idiots. Smarten the fuck up!
https://goo.gl/images/1eUBd35 -
OMG! This!
I was looking at the lowest-valued company in the stock market for kicks and found their candidate description for a web dev. Says it all... https://t.co/JFNdjFTsjo
From Twitter: https://twitter.com/jmeaspls/...
4 -
Every f*k**g morning.. "Good morning _____, goood morning!" I'm so tired of these work from home Zoom calls with my boss. OMG. Everybody gotta suck her dick like we like her. Aaaaaaah. #tears2
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OMG OMG OMG!!! IT WORKS!!!
So one feature I have in my app is I can subscribe to a Rant. This means that if the OP ever posts a new comment, I will get a Notification in the Updates tab.
Completely forgot about this until today!
3 -
Client: my website is down
Support: can you just google my ip and let me know your IP
Client : OMG google is down!!! Oops router was'nt plugged.
**Client is on call just incase you wonder :p -
That moment when you realize that the iOS dev uploaded to ITunes Store an app pointing to the devel IP and not the production one Omg! (i'm an android dev)2
-
OMG @dfox! Thank you for adding the modify! I can finally fix that pesky autocorrect from 3 months ago
Haha jk, 5 minute rule. Can't Heil Hitler all my posts... -
My kick-ass merch from JapanCon Brussels (Nov 2018): a Yoda doormat, TallGeese Gundam Wing model, Pulp fiction displate, AND in front of it A 3D-PRINTED PICKLE RICK OMG CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!! xD
3 -
People on election day: "OMG a subset of the machines are not working!!"
People who work in IT every single day: "lol no shit."4 -
Microsoft Windows: this application has stopped working: Microsoft Windows
omg it's a fucking ERROR PARADOX3 -
Getting into Linux (Kali...)
Omg I had to google everything. Per example how to change the keyboard to my language...😥5 -
Today I download a python instagram bot on github. Man this language is so interesting...
OMG what have I missed????3 -
So 10 phonecalls en 6 emails later i’m pretty much done with jobhunting for today i think. Omg, what an insane day this was!3
-
Me: *tries to save a file using inscape to my documents folder*
AVG: OMG OMG I SWEAR INSKAAPE JUST TRIED TO DELETE *literally the file I just tried to save* BE THANKFULL WE MADE SURE YOU CANT BE PRODUCTIVE WITHOUT TURNING OFF YOUR AV3 -
"I can't connect to the internet on my phone!!11!"
*I open control centre and disable airplane mode*
"omg how you do that thank you"1 -
Just installed KISS launcher on my Android and, omg it changes so much I like it!! It forces you to do and launch the app you need without being surrounded by tons of icons on the screen, awesome 😊16
-
Omg I really like IntelliJ, but its GUI form designer is just completely and utter crap! Can't even resize a button! >:(3
-
Omg, freaking web sockets.. But I figured out how to run a socket server in SSL with the certificates in a root folder. Seems like an early night for me!
-
Do you feel dazed by what front-end development is become? You should read this article, it worths your time https://hackernoon.com/how-it-feels...
I felt the need to share it and to talk about it1 -
Just learned about the Linux watch command today. `watch -n 1 ls -l` OMG, where have you been all my life?3
-
OMG DOES WATSON SUCK !!! I JUST WANT TO SSH IN AND DROP SOME FILES AND START THEM RUNNING DAMN IT NOT MESS WITH NOTEBOOKS !4
-
Today was:
Fuck it, this API makes no sense I'm tired of trying to make sense of it...
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
OMG this makes more sense, why didn't I do this at first?1 -
Nine months learning django and react only to find a job that requires php and bootstrap 3... Omg how tf I'm gonna find time for all this?14
-
!rant
OMG jeahhh!!!
If my boss says yes, I can participate in an "Hackathon" this month in Bonn, Germany! WUHU
(In my department we don't do any programming so I hope he says yes ❤️)5 -
OMG!
The new swag is so adorable! I had to click it immediately, can't wait to have it sitting on my desk :)1 -
OMG! What are you doing guys, the ultimate offer is here by Godaddy. Now I can afford food and domain at the same time, thanks Godaddy!
5 -
OMG!!!!!!!
CTO of a firm is taking my interview for a summer internship profile. I am so excited and afraid, it will be a 15 min telephonic interview.
Any advises??5 -
Omg nothing is as frustrating as writing tests for a given file, that is needed to achieve 100% code coverage. Also not following TDD.3
-
!rant
i hate the QA guys when they gets excited finding a "SUPER REGRESSION OMG THE APP IS BROKEN" just to find out that they haven't read the new specifications.4 -
In a job interview with panel of 4 people and I can't seem to communicate with them properly. OMG I spent 2 days in front of the mirror practicing communication skills.
Oh fuck!1 -
Managing dependencies with npm or yarn feels like trying to communicate with a bunch of hipster kids. "Ugh omg I no longer hang in that namespace like that was so two weeks ago"
-
OMG look at all the opportunities, all the stuffs I want to do and learn. Ooooh look at all the shitty stuffs I don't want to do, but I need to do, oohh noo.1
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Every basic girl: Omg I love fall! You have Halloween, the leaves start to fall and the temperature are finally getting more chilled.
Me: haCKtObErfESt!!!3 -
Anyone else here trying to access the menu of any service display they come across. Can't help it ;)
(Or trying to find an outgoing link if the display is set to a certain website.) -
Window.print()
"OMG it worked after I contacted you last time, now it isn't working again today. WE NEED TO GET THIS FIXED!!!"
Jebus fuck people....2 -
Omg, I can barely see! I think I’ve been working too hard. 123 days straight, 10-14 hours per day. Maybe I’ve lost my mind?
10 -
OMG I hate html2pdf.
WHY ARE YOU PUTTING ENORMOUS SPACES EVERYWHERE ?! WOULD YOU LIKE THAT IF I STARTED TO PAINT IN WHITE ALL YOUR WORK ? WELL NO BECAUSE YOU DO IT ALL BY YOURSELF !9 -
Kinda rant somehow.
So French TV recently filmed a monitor from one of their employees for one of their reportages.
But the thing is
Passwords were written on etiquettes glued to monitor.
Don't do that television please omg -
I just want the css to limit the maximum horizontal width of a table OMG NO WORDPRESS DON'T GIVE ME ANOTHER FUCKING PLUGIN FOR THIS2
-
OMG I have a proper rant from last night.
It involves an unwanted rebase and lost uncommitted code from weeks.
Tune up after my shift.4 -
OMG!! the SCSS is so Sassy..... perfect name for an extension....
SASS : Syntactically Awesome Style Sheet.
I wonder what this guy(the guy who named sass) named his child/pet1 -
The good - devRant has replaced my Facebook, Instagram, 9Gag ☺️
The bad - devRant has also replaced my feeds for Hacker News, The Verge, OMG! Ubuntu! and news sources. 🙁4 -
An I the only one who gets scared when a piece of code break. Like I feel like a bad little kid like omg I broke it please don't look I'm sorry please I didn't mean I'm so sorry
-
An artificial human brain with computers operational power. OMG !!!! That will surely take unlimited time.2
-
So today, I have to clean the project, republish, clean Tomcat's directory, recompile.
That takes forever omg -
Omg has Google placed a new ad scheme online or something? It's fucking huge! Almost an entire screen of ads before seeing the first search result.
AAARRGHH 😑4 -
What is happening to me ? I was so sleeping and attempting to search for docker , instead of typing docker, I misspelt docker as "Dicker".
OMG6 -
Trying to put translation in a drupal 8 project with
Content type => Paragraphs type => paragraphs type.
Wtf i need to translate in witch level OMG.
😭🔫1 -
Do you know that some articles in medium.com is locked ? To unlocked , unblurred it you need to read full article , you need to subscribe to medium.com.
But when you copy the URL of a locked article and paste it in incognito mode which it unlocked for free.
What kind of bug is this 😂?6 -
OMG, what have I done? I've maxed out the Windows 10 start menu size and filled it with tiles, only to realize that I've basically turned the menu into *Windows 8 Metro Home Screen*. By choice. This is scary.2
-
OMG! I just realised one new thing about how people implement Entity Component System library... I'm good to start all over again x) well I don't even remember how many time it happened now ^^"
-
Nice to meet you, where you've been? I can show you legacy code.
C, Python, Ruby and Node.
OMG, look at this line, pretty sure it isn't mine -
When you hit the deploy key, on crap code written by someone else... not caring about Operating..and you realize: OMG iam the poor DevOps guy, who has to fix it.
-
My Advent of Code solution is calculating and calculating, which means I clearly did it wrong. But I already spent 4 hours trying to code it in Clojure (OMG, why can't tail call optimization just work there?!?!)
-
Guys is that the case, that it is such a hassle to work with forms in React-Redux application?! Hell, it takes a lot of time to just create a simple form with like 3 lines of inputs.
Everytime I need to setup bunch of those Actions that will fire on a field value change, than selectors to pick from the state and send to the backend with redux-saga. OMG OMG OMG.
Redux-forms kind a struggle to setup too at first, but I guess I have to go for it anyway?1 -
First time pithing about startup concept in startup bootcamp, 2 fucking dead air (fuck....)
but I'm able to finish my pitch in time.
(Feeling relief now) -
I just watched Bahubali, recomended by my Indian Colleague (wth about so many indians on programming, nice coding btw). Its not a big deal (long and boring most of times) but the WAR SCENE! OMG! INSANE hahahha loved it
-
Your language has nulls. Would rather smash my own skull in with a mechanical keyboard with blue cherry switches so everyone can hear because omg how do you even get by.
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