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Got a job with EA
Went down like this during the interview
Hiring Manager: your second part of your resume seems to be missing?
Me: second part is $20
Hiring Manager: Welcome on board9 -
HR - There is a 2 years gap on your CV!
Candidate - I was in jail.
HR - Why?
Candidate:- I killed the guy who told me : "We'll call you back".
HR :- Welcome on board, You have the Job.6 -
Getting married to a female dev sounds cool, until she starts setting up a trello board for house tasks.🙅23
-
Me wanting to board Plane,
Goes through security Check...
"Sorry sir Laptops are not allowed."
Me
"Why?"
Security
"It could be a modified bomb"
Me
"But this is a Tablet!"
Security
"No sir, it has a Keyboard and Trackpad attached to it, its also running Windows..."
Me
"Excuse me, but this is clearly a Tablet"
*Detatches Keyboard from Surface Book*
"See? Tablet."
Security,
"Sorry sir, but no. You cant board the plane with this, only Tablets and Smartphones"
Me
"WTF? you dont allow Laptops because they could be bombs but A FUCKING SMARTPHONE IS ALLOWED? AND TABLETS TOO?!"
Security
"Yes, because the Battery is not removable..."
Me
"But my Laptop Battery is also not Removable..."
Security
"I dont have anymore Time for an Argument"
Me
"So I can board the Plane?"
Security
"No, the Ticket will be refunded"
WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS BULLSHIT? LIKE RLY? WHO!!
I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK IS ALLOWED?!30 -
He went up to the boss, dragged a big white board into his office.
Wrote company name, drew a big d**k pic on it.
Circled the d**k's head, wrote boss' name and drew an arrow pointing to the circle.
Titled the board reason for me leaving.
Last I heard, they filed a case against him. Not sure about the outcome of it.14 -
I made a Trello board and listed some tasks for me and my team.
My boss comes in, I show him the trello board to show how I organized our tasks.
He liked it, so I asked him if we can use it more frequently.
He replied: this is your code, do whatever you want.
I asked: my code?
He replied: yah didn't just build this webpage? This interactive task manager.
Me in shock: hold on you think I built trello?
Boss: oh ... You didn't ? It looks like something you'd do for your "front end masterbaution".
Me: oh wow, well... If that was the case I would've made $425 million on top of my salary.
Boss: looked at me like meh ~ and walked away...7 -
This project manager, man....
> Sends email to a client "Dear Ms X, here's your password for the Jira board: [...] Please handle it with care and keep it secret."
> Email goes out to 5 people.
6 -
Manager: How long until the current set of tickets is complete?
Dev: Based on storyboard points it’ll be 1.5 weeks from now
Manager: That’s unacceptable! Let me take a look at the board and see if I can remove some low priority tickets.
*Later that day*
Manager: Oooo I found a bunch of really exciting tickets in the backlog that I forgot about. I’ve added them to the board.
Dev: Did you remove any?
Manager: Huh? Oh right. No, I looked and it all needs to get done.
Dev: With these new tickets added to the board our new estimate is 4 weeks.
Manager: WHAT?!? BUT I SPENT ALL DAY LOOKING FOR EFFICIENCIES!!
Dev: …15 -
Manager: Feature C doesn’t work
Dev: We never built feature C
Manager: Nonsense, I remember feature C clearly!
Dev: It’s still in the backlog
Manager: But we had many meetings about it
Dev: Never got put on the board
Manager: Feature C is very important!
Dev: It was never assigned to anyone
Manager: What could possibly be more important than Feature C?
Dev: All the other features you placed on the board and assigned up until now
Manager: Well I need Feature C done asap! It should be top priority!
Dev: Ok then next sprint add feature C to the board and assign it to someone
*Next planning session manager leaves feature C in backlog in favour of other tickets*
*2 days later*
Manager: What is the status of feature C?
Dev: You opted to leave it in the backlog
Manager: BUT IT SHOULD BE TOP PRIORITY!
Dev: …9 -
!rant
I once designed my own Arduino IDE compatible microcontroller, and even had the card manufactured.
Sadly I've yet to actually use it for anything, but hey, achievement unlocked, right?
15 -
Manager: *taps dev on shoulder* We need to do B
Dev: I know, you created a ticket for it yesterday
Manager: Yeah but it hasn’t been done yet. It needs to get done.
Dev: I’m currently working on A which is higher priority
Manager: Ok but B needs to be done too
Dev: I know, it’s next on my board
Manager: I’m just making sure you are aware of it
Dev: I am aware of it, it’s next on the board
Manager: Ok but make sure you do it after A
Dev: Yup it’s next up
Manager: Ok, don’t let anyone distract you
Dev: …9 -
Teacher : The world is fast moving, you should learn all the new things in technology. If not you'll be left behind. Try to learn about Cloud, AI, ML, Block chain, Angular, Vue, blah blah blah.....
**pulls out a HTML textbook and starts writing on the board.
<center>.............</center>5 -
Manager: I need estimates for your sprint tasks
Me: I've never done any of this before, my estimates have no context and are effectively worthless
Manager: don't worry it's just for the Jira board.
Me: OK *gives estimates*
End of sprint comes...
Manager: Why isn't task X done?
Me: *sigh*
I don't miss my old job :)
3 -
When my brother told me he was using a breadboard i tought he wanted to be a baker. Guess he ain't baking no bread, only circuits.
6 -
Well apparently my compression algorithm actually made the file bigger. Back to the drawing board I guess?8
-
After 10 months of development we bring the first prototype of our awesome new product to show it to the board of directors. Whereupon the chairman of the board angrily shouts at us "has nobody told you we cancelled this project a month ago?!"
I left two months later, they went bankrupt a year later.4 -
HOLY FUCK I DID IT
I wrote an Arduino code for my friend. I didn't have any board at the moment to test it, but he flashed it the next day, and EVERYTHING FUCKING WORKED!!! AT THE FIRST TIME!!!10 -
Wrote this on a quote board at work after spending six hours trying to get one piece of software to work on Ubuntu.
15 -
Network-connected train displays, failing and displaying their IP address, on a train that has WiFi on board. That's just begging to be hacked.
19 -
Had a video game thought a few years ago. Wrote it down. Created a board game of it last year. Tweaked it. This year I am diving into Unreal Engine 4, Maya and C++ to make it come to life...8
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!rant I guess. Its coffee on a chip. Just spend 3h making this board to be implemented in my coffee machine. Just to wake up with the smell of coffee. The board is 2.9 by 3.2 cm
12 -
When my manager asks me if I can fix all the bugs on the board by the weekend: 'look, I have a covenant with God: I don't do miracles, He doesn't code.'4
-
I was at the airport, 2AM, waiting for the plane I was supposed to board to come from another airport... Got bored, scanned the WiFi networks, found an open network with the ID of the airline I had booked with, joined, and tried port 22 on the gateway... It was a Cisco router with the default password... Needless to say, I thought I needed to teach those guys a lesson... Messed the routing table, changed its IP, disabled DHCP, and restarted the router. Needless to say, we couldn't board because they couldn't check us in...21
-
My teachers rant: "Who invented whiteboard markers? *trying to write some code on the board, but the marker went dry* What every happened to black boards and chalk. Chalk never gets dry.... I going to have to look that up" LOL, man I love him. He is so old that its funny and cute at the same time15
-
I found this poster in one of my labs at University... Why is he trying to align the CPU with the cooler before the CPU is even in the mother board.
Great play, forgot the thermal paste as well.
4 -
A new type of dev hiring strategy:
I'll pick some selected rants from devRant and show it to the candidate on a white board. Their reaction will decide their chances of hiring ;-)1 -
Some days back before, it was my birthday so I invited my friend who make apps and games with me and I said "lets eat raspberry pi" so he came to my house and said where is the pie. I pointed at the green board at the table. LOL
2 -
So I got myself a rubber duckie, works quite nicely 😊
After third time in one day of boss calling me in and using me as a sound board to solve his problems, I gave him my duckie to use instead. He's happy, I don't get called in anymore, but am now duck-less 😥3 -
You might remember this board from my last post...
After weeks and weeks of trying to get this microcontroller to work I finally managed, and of course the problem was that I was being stupid...
Anyway, it now fades an LED on and off! Very fun, now to make a keyboard...
11 -
!rant
Apparently everyone else has some sort of inanimate object they use for debugging. Am I the only dev that just using all the other voices in my head for a souding board?13 -
You know what really grinds my gears?
You spending three hours googling for a solution to an issue, only to find a message board that has a 404 link to a solution, which was posted 10 years ago.5 -
Things you hear from developers 5 minutes before demo to the whole Management Board.
- "... Does this button work... Nope... Oh well..."
- "What the hell is THAT!?"
- "Um... Is it supposed to look like this?"
- "Please tell me you didn't just merge this!?!" -
When I was a kid I fucked with a ouija board and now trying to debug massive regex expressions I swear Satan has finally come to screw me9
-
!rant
I'm currently helping a junior developer in my team to get on board. He is new to Linux and whenever I ask him to work on vi editor, I get to see that look on his face!
16 -
Best swag ever: 3d printed dev rant avatar? I would love to have my mini-self on my desk! Or for playing board games! For rubberducking! In the fishtank! Oh man, inifinite posibilities ... *_* what would you guys do with one????
14 -
So we have this HUGE ass project , really challenging , that my boss and "PM" have been meeting with the client for months now...
I got on board , guess what?
NO ONE HAVE A FUCKING CLUE ON WHAT THE FUCK THEY WANT!!!!!
ALL FUCKING GENERIC REQUIREMENTS!!! WHAT THE FUUUCK!!!
[ insert fucking pitch screaming!!!! ]
FUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!1 -
Turns laptop off
Writes key todo list on mini white board for tomorrow.
Thinking occures
Wait a minute, i think i know how to do that!
Turns laptop back on to see if i'm right.
Gets too exited for sleep because thing works3 -
Doing some HR today... Polish surnames really are a case of "I dropped a Scrabble board and picked up mostly consonants"7
-
Got a new eval board. It came in with a stock firmware, had its own IP and naturally its own webGUI. I wanted to check what was under the hood. So I SSH'd in to the device, and was prompted to enter the username. There weren't any specs or documentation.
*Hmm, let's try root*
User: root
Password: *Eh? Well, what the heck* admin
.
.
.
root@evalboard#
Muhahaha!!! Meet your hacker, eval board!3 -
I'm a founder of a small startup. We had a board meeting on a Friday, and Thursday night I sent a strongly worded email to the chairman and point investor, both of whom are worth well over $100 million, expressing my concern that we were undercapitalized and they were taking advantage of our youth and inexperience in order to make a quick return on their investment. The board meeting the next day was 2 hours of me getting railed.1
-
So I got a couple of C.H.I.P. single-board computers a good while back because Raspberry Pi Zero was always out of stock.
I named them pringles, the smooth and synthetic one with a GUI, and ruffles, the sturdier and rugged one with a headless OS.
...They still lack a definitive purpose in life.4 -
I wanted to let everyone know that I finally decided to release the new version of my website! 😄
https://www.tabletopfinder.eu/
TableTopFinder is a board game database with price comparing in several European web shops.
Any feedback is welcome, I like good ideas! 😊7 -
brain storming about system design on miro board
at the beginning, all devs add components they think that might be relevant for the system.
PM heavily moves everything around, deletes or changes meaning of added boxes without asking. after five minutes, he is the only one using the board, rest of the team is just watching.
PM: come on, guys. don't just sit and watch, you can also participate.
besides that, the resulting system in the end was complete garbage.7 -
We were in a c class learning about pointers, the teacher was doing small stars on the board to explain the basics of them.
After a short while we all understood, or so we taught.
Someone asked about double pointers, so the teacher put 2 stars on the board to explain. THEN THE IDIOT OF THE CLASS GOES AND BLOODY ASKS IF WE COULD REPLACE THE 2 STARS BY A BIG ONE.
I MEAN OF COURSE JUST PUT A STAR EMOJI TO MAKE A DOUBLE POINTER.
The legend still lives on as he got kicked for an unknown reason🤔.3 -
I hate white boarding sessions. They feel unnatural to me. I simply don't work well when put on the spot and I have 3 ogres staring at me waiting for me to fuck up in front of them. Fight or flight engages, the adrenaline rush, my mind freezes. Suddenly it's like I forget how to code at all and I'm expected to solve a problem at once, correctly the right time, or I'm out.
I can't work like that. I need time to process a problem on my own, with my coffee in my one hand and a pencil and scratch paper in the other, not with some demanding employer standing over my shoulder the whole time scrutinizing my every key stroke. I get things wrong the first time sometimes, and more often than not have to google things I can't recall spontaneously. But I always figure it out, test it, make sure it's right before putting it into use.
I've been through several "probationary" periods when first starting a job. They just tell you, they're giving you a month to see if you can handle the job. If not, sayonara. I don't see what's so hard about evaluating candidates in a real world scenario.
So many employers have totally unrealistic expectations.2 -
Coworker called me up and shouted at me for refactoring code. "It might break!".
But his copy paste addiction is sure to make everything more stable, right?
Course, he still hasn't figured out that I'm the tech lead, so I will completely ignore his useless whining, as I have his boss on board.6 -
“You have a Jira?”
“You need a Jira, first”
“Open a Jira”
“You need a Jira for that too”
“That Jira is on the wrong board, plus you need to email _this_ form first”
Jira, Jira, Jira-fucking-jira, AAAHHHHHHHHHHH, STOP!
My job appears to be nothing more than an abstraction layer around Jira. A leaky abstraction11 -
Monday morning and Microsoft goes down across the board
No office
No teams
No SharePoint
No azure
Not any fucking thing.
Well done ass hats, not like I had anything to do today 😓1 -
Ah! The sense of achievement you get, the feeling of accomplishment you feel, the beautiful red light that glows up on board, when you repair your home's broken wiring.
I fucking ❤ hardware. Best WYSIWYG of all.7 -
VoIP meeting today lasted 7 minutes.
I have kept the board down to ~5 ticket average for the last 3 months.
Co-worker(jokingly): I guess we don't need you anymore.
CEO: Quite the contrary. @chenb0x may need a promotion.
Me: *smirks*
This is why I like working for this company. Love the culture....no matter how much I may bitch about the clients.
'How did I get here?' a young dev may ask.
1. Delegate where proper
2. Script whatever can be scripted
3. When the board is low in tickets, it becomes a recursive responsibility to keep it low.
Back story
-----------------
When I was hired, the VoIP board was sitting at a ~30-40 ticket average.1 -
Programme that simulates the rolling of the dice when playing the Risk board game.
No more dice that fall off the table. No more dice that throw the figures into disarray.
12 -
The British summer results in restless nights and broken sleep filled with nightmares.
One particular dream last night involved my friends messing around with a ouija board and they begin asking in questions. I remain sceptical and tell them to ask it to reveal the solution to the issues I'm having retrofitting a legacy web app with a new design.
The board disconnected itself. Hell had no answer. -
!rant
I was added to a private Trello board today, of a company that I’m not a part of.
I don’t know if I should mess around with their boards and move stuff around, just leave the board, or better yet, relieve devs of their assigned tasks.
😆4 -
Working on a custom Chromium OS board at the moment
So boards in Chromium OS are specialized versions of Chromium OS built for a specific hardware while maintaining upstream compatibility.
I built a board specifically to be as near as CloudReady's compatibility table as possible, so this is what I have at the moment:
* Most hardware works (Libinput)
* Still working on supplying Nvidia drivers using nouveau (Google insists using OSS drivers, we can't use NVIDIA drivers)
* Still working on making Crostini GPU-enabled by default so I don't always terminate it via vmc
* ARC works as per the open sourced Android Runtime but I need help making the Play Store working
Overall its a bit stable but if anyone's down I'll replicate it on a GitHub repository and I'll let everyone contribute their changes. The aim of the custom board is to:
* Make it work on most hardware possible
* Add android support with APK installation (FydeOS has this but I can't replicate it in CrOS).
* Produce a close to Chrome's release channel.
Here's a screenshot of me using it, it works but I'll need to start over from scratch to make it more contributable
10 -
-Games (board games or video games)
-Coffee and other beverages
-Enough tech gadgets
But most important of all, love what you do. -
I just had to put a Button + Link on a page.
the btn opens a link
and the link doesnt open a link, but copies to clip board.
And if u dont see whats wrong with this picture, you are part of the problem.4 -
Any board artists want to make a crest for me?
Looking for comething with sharp black lines, that's tattoo worthy.
:3
Below is the Main symbol, as well as three words that I would like included.
Thanks in advance~
3 -
Salesforce.
I mean I hate to be a predictable broken record, but it really is the biggest PITA thing I've come across. Proprietary stuff across the board, arbitrary limits, ridiculously tedious to get sane debug logging turned on and boy, if you've ever had to go through their process for listing an app...5 -
I am glad to see all the pent up anger toward project managers. I quietly rage against them daily. I have even made up acronyms like "LIS" for "like I said", "DBR" for "Drive by requests" and "OSR" for "one sentence requirements". I write them on my white board and the don't know what it means.8
-
Serverless is like our Hoverboard. It's not "no server" and its not "a board that hovers".
Whoever comes up with these names deserves a medal for trolling the tech world.5 -
Last year I changed jobs from a large multi-national to a small local agency (which happens to be run by friends of mine).
One of the reasons for doing this was that my work involved more office politics than *actual* software development, and had just plain stopped being fun.
Now, I am having fun again! An example?
For one of our clients we have to connect to (a lot) of third-party APIs. Often even SOAP APIs!
Now I hear you protest "But that is no fun at all! SOAP APIS SUCK!" Which is true, more often than not. 😔
BUT! My friend started an internal API-SNAFU Trello board. Every time you get bitten in the ass by some ill conceived fuck-up of an API, you get to add your complaint to the board.
Beside giving as something to reciprocally rant about, the board also serves a serious function: depending on the amount of fuck-ups an API has been known to make, the price for working with that API will go up.
Who said it doesn't pay to complain? 😀1 -
I have now turned the name board in my cubicle to hide my name.
Why you ask? Not because I don't like my name, or dislike my name board (there's this little design on it which is just delightful).
It is to make it a bit more difficult for new morons who don't know who I am or where I sit. Can't do much more than that because I have a desktop.
5 -
Found on Applebees company listing on the hackernoon jobs board 😆
Well played D... well played...
[source](https://jobs.hackernoon.com/employe...)
5 -
Between high school and college, working in a circuit board manufacturing storeroom.
Fun fact: when we are bagging small boards, we do not gently lay them in containers, they're usually thrown at least 6 feet into a bin of the same type of board after they're placed in the bag. We also don't remake a board when pins are bent, we just bend them back with tweezers. And you know that rule about not touching the gold connectors... Yeah... So much for that... Did I remember to mention that these boards are for medical equipment?
On the bright side, we at least have electrostatic discharge control going on all the time.3 -
Didn’t want people staring at a random coding problem so I converted the board to something relevant to the event hehe
-
Not entirely dev related, but...
I'm getting tired of (electrical, mechanical) engineers complaining about HW limitations like "oh this board only has 12 KB of flash memory" or "I can't make this thing move smoother because my CPU is only 16 MHz" Bitch, you can spend $500 on 3 servo motors, but you can't afford to pay extra $5 to get a board with better specs to control them?8 -
A company in Switzerland keep re-posting job openings for "ninja software engineers" on the university board. Maybe I should slide in with my black pyjamas and a katana and see If I make the cut?
1 -
If 13 hour days on Friday are the norm, I'm going to have to go back to the drawing board. Fuck that.9
-
I was passing through a street where I found a sign board that said "Linux installation certified course"
What has the world come to these days? -
Felt sorry for this old guy, so I have decieded to actualize him. Fresh paint inside and outside plus the new board arrived as well. :)
9 -
And the award for the best ticket if all time goes to:
"Create script"
No open questions. Of you don't understand, are you really a dev?
In all seriousness, this thing was in the board for like 3 days and nobody raised any questions...9 -
Just introduced my best friend to devRant! Immediately enthusiastic! Welcome on board mate :). @CoffeeAllDay !2
-
So I made a message board and posted it here at devrant
Now there’s a user with username Ass and I don’t know what to do about that situation…. I don’t want to remove him from user, but all he posts is ass…
Fuck me
20 -
Org mode as kanban board for personal projects is quite usable.
(trying to find if this gonna works)
11 -
Brace yourselves for the sticker board of my retired ThiccPad T540p with which I spent my undergraduate college years! My new laptop has no sticker on it ( maturing perhaps?) but has MOE POWA BABEY...
Keeping it as a backup device and an antique.
12 -
After you brainstorm on a white board, take a photo, and clean up after yourself.
Coworkers were complaining about dried white board marker.
I told them to use the hand sanitizer from the bathroom, it will clean off all marks.
Now you know too.2 -
During a period when devs had been told "The board has been promised that we are improving quality, so you must not do anything but write unit tests", I wrote a unit test that compares the number of system colors in .NET to a constant. It's still running today (a couple of years later).
-
So, our team got a new dart board. Not the magnetic one, the wooden one with sharp darts.
Now, we all are wondering where should we place it, so that it is safe for everyone.3 -
So our new hardware guy who is being managed by our lead embedded developer had the task of designing me an expansion board for my Linux board. The Linux board uses the 40 pin expansion like the raspberry, bananna and orange pi family and as you all know there are many different types of expansion boards for this.
I said at the start come to me and tell me what you want to connect to before deciding which pin you connect to so it is less work for me with Linux board configs and drivers.............
No no no we will sort it all... erm.....
So today they come ask me if they can use an SPI port for GPIO and I am like erm... why there is plenty of GPIO...
It turns out they have been designing the board based on the pin outs of an expansion board and not the actual connector of the Linux board.. I mean seriously WTF!1 -
Major win for the organization arround the world: https://icann.org/news/blog/...
Tldr, Icann rejected the offer by Ethos Capital for the .ORG tld. 🎉5 -
Fuck it all to Hell today. I'm cutting into my mostly night time Xanax script at noon.
My boss just made my coworker remove his own copyrighted photo from our Trello board for internal development. The board is only used by the two of us for internal projects. He thinks that our C-level execs would get onto him, not my coworker, for us having a fucking photo of the Boston city skyline on our own, internal, never fucking seen by anyone but us, Trello board. It has fucking animated gifs from Giphy on it, but my fellow dev can't use his own god damn photo as the background.
We're a fucking marketing department for home building materials not a blog using Getty images without permission for fuck's sake.
Then on top of that fucking Cache rules are fucking up on Drupal views and a webform decided to just stop fucking working for submissions after about 26,000 successful ones and it corrupted the last 500 or so in the process.
Oh and fuck Varnish.4 -
I finally got around to ledding up my board. Its powered by an attiny board so i can upload new color schemes on the fly.
2 -
Literally removing the sleep(10);
Nah jokes aside, reworking my entire code from scratch based on what I drew up on a board.
Sometimes visualisation of processes and control flow can really help you write better code.9 -
A few days after the vacation, daddy (me) finally finished copying all the photos from the digital camera to the big external hard drive. Left it lying in the living room, in the corner where all the tech stuff frequently lies. In come my boys, and I'm not sure why, they start plugging power supplies around. Unfortunately the one from the laptop fit into the hole on the external disk, but had a different (higher) voltage. Result: 1 fried hard drive, containing all the baby photos and videos of said boys up that time.
I still believe that it's only the circuit board that is fried, and the data is still all there. I still have the hope to find a used disk, replace the board and all will be back.5 -
It's not like we needed this information board anyway, to help us monitor our servers, tickets and calendar.
Thats some microsoft quality!
7 -
When you walk in a job interview & see a white board...
Credits:commentsense888 but pretty sure (s)he copied it too
1 -
Years ago I was on the board for the European Student Card pilot.
What a beauty.
It went well and fully operating around three years later. Then escalated and got a new project name, myAcademicID.
Requirements became more political so I left.
I am still registered on the dev & sandbox. AMA4 -
Does anyone have experience with aligning 2D Lidar scanners?
I have a front and back facing ones, each with 270 degrees scanning range, so they have overlap.
Is there a golden standard for offline Lidar alignment, like Charuco board for camera alignment?3 -
Well, our board dedicated to On call has so many tickets that given the rate our team is going, it'll take 30+ years to finish them all.
Oh and it keeps growing -
I was just told by the patent review board of the automotive corporate I work for, that virtual camera dynamics are not patentable.
Well, when the only thing you understand is the mechanics of window-wipers and you've never heard of the computer games industry....3 -
Out of nowhere, someone called me from a jobs board and said that they really liked my profile and that they sent me a job invite and they were in a hurry to get someone new - with my profile exactly. I haven't logged into that jobs board for a couple months, but upon checking, I see that their company sent me an invite and that the working environment was great. Remote first, no daily standups, competitive pay, and the site was legit. So okay, I accept their invite.
The next day I got an email back saying unfortunately they would close the application because they were only hiring people with a couple years experience in some tech... which was listed in my profile in the jobs board.
I'm like lolwut you invited me, don't you turn that around like I'm begging you for a job.4 -
Planning for a new personal project using:
Pico Pro Maker Kit
Contains:
1 Pico i.MX7 Dual Development Board
1 camera module
1 5" multi touch display
USB-C cable and connectors
Feel free to suggest me some good IOT project
2 -
Job advertisement :
Ongoing project in
- .Net Core
- Docker
- AWS
- DDD and microservices
Reality :
- For now we have one monolith solution with 60 projects in .Net Framework, hosted on premise.
- But on the jobs board it was described as something completely opposite.
- We are going to migrate maybe this year, if we will have time6 -
Every thought of using developer-related stuff in your home? When I get married I plan to have a private family slack workspace and Trello board and everyone gives stand-ups.5
-
It's a sad fact of life that managing dynamic memory is a very difficult programming task. Some public domain X-Window applications are notorious for leaking like the Apple Computer board of directors -- Expert C Programming4
-
Some kid on stackoverflow, just starting out in the coding world, posted his resume to the board and asked what people thought.
Immediately recieved 3 negatives and then had the post removed.
Pretty shitty community - we all started out once, just give him some useful pointers. What a miserable lot.11 -
Niceeee.
Been receiving packages every day but today I good good shit..
Ideias for me to try?
4 relay module, 4 mostef board, finally the gears for the motors I'm scraping, and more mostefs. My mom is saying that I have the mailman for myself lol
2 -
I get to learn so many different things in DevRant, that I want to add it as my task in the Sprint Board
-
My preferred BBS board has been down for a week. I'm starting to worry it might not come back up. I NEED TO READ DOVENET, DAMMIT!
;-;1 -
Those living in Sydney know there's an app called Opal you can use to navigate public transport.
Part of this is app is a trip planner which can suggest the fastest route to your destination, and is aware of train and bus movements in real-time (supposedly)
Me: Fastest route from station T to station C
App: In 5 minutes, walk 12 minutes to station M and board train. You will arrive at your destination by 20:12
5 minutes later...
Me: Fastest route from station T to station C
App: In 1 minutes, board train. It is the same train that will arrive at station M in 12 minutes. You will arrive at your destination by 20:12
Am I going mad, or does they algorithm stink?5 -
Apple just changed their file system to apfs across the board, but no recent documentation on the release. It automaticalky changes from hfs+ when you install the macos 10.12.4 update. In early docs it says that time machine is not supported, but surely they cant kill everyones short term backups?9
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Blender! Simply because they are well organized (they even use a public kanban board in phabricator 😊) and are improving the project with so much passion. Also they use the software themselves in projects on a regular basis so they know very well what has to be improved.
Exciting for blender 2.8 😁 show them some love: www.blender.org -
!rant
mods are asleep.
all aboard the ++ train
How to:
++ all the comments in the thread. once you reach the end, post a comment. only post one comment. board the train.19 -
I want to start with Arduino stuff.
Some tips which board i should buy?
Or some tips for a Hello World or something like this?11 -
How much is your max up-time on raspberry pi?
Can it survive being on all the time? The board seems not made out of premium stuff3 -
I've spent the past few months working on creating a decentralized application network built for developers. Here's a link to a quick blog post I made explaining the idea. I'd love to get some of you on board! https://dev.to/alexdovzhanyn/...2
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Hey devRanters do you know any free and simple Kanban Board Desktop mac apps? I don't want a saas service and i can't use the apple app store.4
-
Made a node program that connects to a development board (like a raspberry pi) via rs232 and installs an image automatically.
-
I cant with this company any longer.
Most of it is crap but this is too much
Retrospective meeting after 2weeks sprint.
Sprint board for the meeting, in the not good section
1 -
Trello's android app doesn't give you the option to choose a board when you make a widget. It just picks one itself based on seemingly arbitrary requirements. Thankfully, trello has a brilliant open API, so there are several capable third party apps.
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Actors/Use cases and analysis modeling approaches as a whole are for retards that require pictures for everything they do.
Designing this shit is time consuming and should be delegated to simple board drawing rather than full featured software that can develop this monumental waste of time.
Change my mind5 -
Product manager keeps fucking with my Jira board, changing names of tickets that he's not even the reporter of and none of his names make any sense. I keep thinking my tickets have disappeared. He doesn't understand how Jira works and confuses the shit out of me.4
-
when the client's representative has to validate every change or addition through the board of directors.1
-
Hey guys! Finally decided to jump on board! This is my first rant so go easy.
Working on a project were some freedom of choice is allowed and thinking about using polymer to create a wordpress theme... Is this a good idea or a terrible one?
😕6 -
Is told to make a cool football themed board for a planning expo.
Thinks football is stupid, but makes an awesome board with a built in football game made with a Raspberry Pi and optical sensors to detect when you throw a ball through the hole.
Boss tells me that my board doesn’t match the theme and doesn’t even mention the fact that what I made was cool as fuck.
Have to trash the board and make something lame with construction paper footballs instead.
My soul is dead. Business people are such fucking children who punish creativity and reward mediocrity. I need to find a company run by developers.1 -
I've been working on a new meme-platform / image-board with a friend for the past few months and we've just reached an working form with most of the basic functionality in place. Now we could use some memers to test the page and fill it with some content. If you love memes as much as we do we would be greatful if some of you could give it a try :)
You can find us under: soosig.me
19 -
Girl: "Professor I don't really understand the algorithm. Can you please write it on the board again?"
Professor writes down the alphabet.
Girl: "I don't get it."
We were talking about traversing a Binary search tree in Inorder traversal.2 -
!dev
My daughter who was playing carom board first time in her life... defeated me (without cheating)4 -
I finally got one of these boards, I still need to figure what to track on it, I already have a planner with me for my day to day
any suggestions?
10 -
Does anyone know a single-board computer like e.g. the raspberry pi that features a physical on-board audio input as well as an output?
I know that GPIO-header-boards like e.g. the hifiberry or WolframAudio (which seems somewhat deprecated by now) exist. I could probably also alternate to an USB-soundcard, but I'm curious whether someone might know a more compact solution.5 -
#momtexts
"I don't know what button got pushed but I can't type with my laptop key board now. Can you tell me what buttons to try?" -
My team: please read that article about blameless postmortems, there's a lot we could take on board to improve team morale
My team extra-passive-aggressive at the first incident: why did you do that? That was never gonna work3 -
Live coding interview to code tic tac toe console game and I couldn’t even print out the game board. FML.2
-
Recently south Indians are furious because of hindi language used (along with English and Kannad(one of the languages used in south India) ) on metro station board.
What if programmers also starts protesting. Isn't JavaScript shoved into every web developer without any alternative.5 -
What can I do with my spare Android devices/boards? Could I use the board with a custom OS for a Pi/Arduino analog?
I have 2 tablets that I have no use for. Googling suggestions are pretty simple and nothing that repurposes the hardware.7 -
Alright so
I made an infinite post board.
Infinite in the sense that every post will be on this board, spiraling from position 0 0
I haven’t got a domain but here’s the address:
138.197.71.184
Not built for mobile and may later wipe data because it’s still in testing phase
Anyone who wants to register and leave a post is welcomed to do so10 -
Depends on what a tough dev day is. If it was just a tough day usually playing ice hockey helps. If it was a stressful day, board games with my daughter, provided it's not a Wednesday (her Mom's night). If it's a tough problem or bug I'm working on then alcohol, running or lifting, sex, general distractions will do the trick
-
Coding the board software for a car while you drive it at 120 kmph can be called agile programming?1
-
So today I finally lost my sanity and public'ed by somewhat Chromium OS board overlay and built on top of that already...
so yeah...
source here: https://github.com/sr229/maru
I need to reconsider my life choices1 -
See a stupid neme, trying to get my feet wet in android development, make a "sound board" with 1 buttton that plays 1 sound
> mfw Skiddadle skidoodle is my most successful app with 30 ish concurrent users
Soldmysoul.jpeg for the memes2 -
Trying to install macOS on my PC and it keeps failing at the major install point during to "security".... For fucks sake!
-
I'm kind of surprised people haven't tried using devRant as a job board yet. There's a lot of raw talent here, both seniors, and juniors experimenting with everything.
May as well start. We have ping pong!9 -
On March 31st I asked our HR to print off a birthday sign for Ed for April 1st. Which I hung outside Ed's office. I also asked to put Ed's birthday as 4/1 in the electronic bulletin board at work. I was hoping for Ed to see the bulletin board on Monday. He did see this Friday. He knew it was me and was a good sport about it. He kept the birthday sign on his office all day.1
-
The tale about our famous imbecile IT guy goes on.
After 7++ emails from the CXO and 4 emails from head of dev department, the IT guy has still, not provided the access I requested for our servers.
Do note, the head of dev department has been appointed by the Board of Directors to manage the infrastructure upgrade and merge.
The way everything has been done till now, is that one person controls everything and holds the usernames/ passwords. That’s going to change. At least 3 people will know it. And a super user will be created, and password given to the board of directors in a sealed envelope
I guess someone is at risk of loosing their job...
/me looks at IT guy1 -
Cleaning the white board after a problem is solved is still the 2nd most satisfying thing. Closing chrome tabs is still 1st3
-
Post your gear!
60% Vortex POK3R, MX Blue, PBT Custom Keycaps
100% Cherry MX-Board 3.0, MX Brown, PBT Custom Keycaps
16 -
Becoming one of the world's top players in the card game of Yugioh.
A long with actively getting good at other card games and board games. -
Today we received a new scrum master. Seems nice enough.
Now he wants to remove the fucking swimlanes from OUR jira board and change them into separate sub tasks.
Wtf.4 -
!devRant
Be me on vacation ~1500 miles from home
Board dogs like normal
Oldest dog (13y) gets sick
Boarding people take to vet as requested
Vet calls saying he is vomiting "coffee grounds" (that means he is bleeding into his stomach)
Won't be back until next Sunday
May have to bury dog when I get back.2 -
Play designer board games; they are multi-tenant programs, complex algorithms, modularity, meticulously balanced, and all elegantly linked to an artful UI. They are also made out of cardboard.
It is hard to play them and not become a developer that builds increasingly holistically.8 -
Chess game: EVERYONE is allowed to participate and move.
Rules:
-once you played a move for one side, youre not allowed to change side
-if you cant visualisate the board, use a real board.
-no takeback
-dont do sabotage!!
-let others play too. Youre not allowed to play three moves in a row.
-use algebraic notation
-if youre black, write three dots in front of your move ( 1. ... d5)
GOOD LUCK!
Im starting with
1. d47 -
My mechanical keyboard just died :/ Plugged it into my work tower and started smelling "burnt". its a WASD V3, i hope they can ship me just the controller board because shipping the keyboard to the US and back it's going to take a too much time and money...
-
When planning how to design some piece of software, specifically when it's object orientated, what "tools" do you use for taking notes?
I mostly prefer a white board or the ol' reliable (pen and paper)10 -
Fuck Off JPEG you piece of ancient shit. Hello HEIF! Not apple tech but they are certainly adopting it across the board (also replaces gif). Safari is the only browser supporting the format. Now we have to wait for every fucker else to arrive, could be 5 years for Mucroshite (wankers).7
-
Have bought a set of white board pens to scribble on my windows. Have been writting some stuff down on them for a uni project for the past half hour. It's almost 4am. Damn it
-
I sit right behind the board games table. While it was nice that my company provides games and doesn't mind us playing for destressing, my colleagues played and laughed so loud at the table that sometimes they distracted my work discussions with the other colleagues. Usually when this happens I'll just join them.
-
How many developers does it take to install a white board...
3, and 1 QA, 1 designer, 1 project manager and 3 attempts...9 -
On vacation today but forgot we had a board game team activity planned so went to the office anyway in the afternoon (love me some board games) and instantly get pounced by people pleading for help. The build machine had imploded and the deploys broke, because of course it does that when you are away.1
-
-OS lecture
Sir asked us to play quiz (kahoot app)
If this isn't stupid enough, the questions he asked were like:
What is the meaning of cc in email? -_-
To make things worse, he writes scheduling programs on board by looking at his notebook :/5 -
Today had a board meeting. This explains why the front page is all new and flashy and there are breaking changes everywhere.
-
I have Dell latitude 3379 with on-board graphic card
Do you think it's enough for training ANN and doing a small ML project or I must improve it to laptop with Nvidia graphic card?6 -
On a white board discussing with the team, rubbed list leaving numbers so that I won't have to list them again.1
-
So, I need to figure out what ir protocol a controller board uses. I know how to do it with a remote, but how would I do it with the board? Can I reverse engineer the ir reciver to find it's protocol?10
-
New project last week*
Today:
Client asked for the trello board of the new project, but I didn't manage to create it because the requirements are vague.
Finished setting up the board today and clutched everything.
Lesson learned: pressure is key 😂 -
I’m looking to start a mastermind group for those of us with side projects who would like to see them become more than that, and would appreciate a weekly sounding board / advice session from those in a similar boat.
If your interested in finding out more ++ this and drop me a note to mastermind [at] jamespearson.email -
My space key is not coming back once i clicked . Served like 10 years. It deserve better end than this. damn it guys we lost him. He was so close to retirement. Just this morning he said to me " I am too tired of this board". Its fairwell brother.13
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So decided to build a board game... Game?
It's hex grid based and I have spent a week trying to work out hex grid math and I am at the exact point I was when I started if not further back....
If anyone can recommend some good tutorials or articles for hex math. I will love you forever...6 -
I’m still thinking about doing one of my old idea, which is an infinite posting board. But I guess I have to ask the hard question: is it useful?
Please people let me know15 -
Asked a question on SO,
Why is my Microcontroller (Android things IOT) not getting detected in my Mac to flash an image?
Someone commented:
Mac doesn't provide enough power to it.
(Really, I can see a green light on the board)4 -
In hospital today and the queue is too long, all I see are the help desk computers restarting cause the on board application software isn't running, sometimes a manual paper system > shoddy computerised system
-
Either get some form of 'stable' release of my current gang engine or just grow a pair and finally teach myself C and go back to the drawing board and build my engine with complete portability.8
-
That moment when there's a 30 email long chain between 3 members of the board stretching over 7 weeks about design ideas and all before anything has been signed or money has been exchanged.... Oh to be a freelancer...
-
Today's task - trying to convince our BA that we don't need to create a task on the board to tell us to create a set of other tasks on the board 🤦♂️1
-
!rant
Any recomendation on a mini board/micro pc/chip etc, somenthing really small that can run linux and open a browser?? Just to connect my tv to it and be able to surf on the web, somenthing ligth, won't do any heavy stuff with it. Cheap if possible
Thank you!5 -
I had a meeting 5days after accepting work from a client (the project was basically a mirror version of your typical job board with extra features).
The client and our project manager joined forces in labeling my progress/project/work "untouched" because it was simply still undeployable.. fml -
When you're out at the ComicCon, surrounded by all those magnificent nerds, having a blast, got yourself the best debugging buddy(who brings on board the knowledge of the ancient ones - pic below) but you kiiiinda want to be home already, because you want to learn RoR - then you know you're hooked.
-
Work Pc is windows xp.... Dev board requires a Linux tool chain... The PC falls over trying to run a VM, so end up needing to run a VM on our CI server (beefiest bit of kit I have access to) , I have to deal with laggy eclipse, over RDP to the VM. On top of that the dev board comes with around 10k pages of documentation.... Most of which either doesn't work, or is missing vital bits of information.... Oh and PM has promised a working product to customers in less than 3 months l, despite us not actually managing to get the desired platform to even boot correctly yet.... *screams *2
-
Anyone here into self made drones? I'm building one and get get the video work, the camera + fpv sender work, but I only get the osd and not the actual video. Wired from the description provided by the shop I bought it from, seems alright.
Using the betaflight f4 board.8 -
when your application works everywhere, in every situation, for every user, EXCEPT on the fucking device and user of the new Board Member....
...fuck fuck fuck.
(specially because we have a task dedicated specially to test and target CEO and old board members devices) -
How do I solve this board without guessing? Always get stuck on these and what the pattern to look for is.
13 -
!rant
People, have you tried the new board system on GitLab's issues?
I use Gitlab in my company (because it's awesome), but my personal projects are in GitHub. I'm thinking about moving some of them to GitLab because of this feature (I really like to organize things and really hate to use multiple services to run a project, so this new board/kanban system makes Taiga, which I am currently using to run things, kind of redundant).
About the new GitLab's feature
[https://about.gitlab.com/2016/08/...]
The downside of this is that I don't see GL as a social experience like GH.
Any avice? Thank you.
Important: I'm not a PM of some sort. Just a dev.
1 -
I'm pissed at my laptop. Its using the on board graphics instead of the dedicated graphics card. I've searched everywhere and can't find a solution. I've tried just disabling the on board graphics in the device manager, but then I can't plugin external monitors. And on top of that when opening a game it doesn't even use the GPU it uses the CPU
Anyone have advice? The onboard is AMD Radeon R7 and the card is an AMD RX 560 -
I installed ratposition desktop environment onto my auto login centos 7 computer... Let's just say I was stuck in it for over two hours.....
Ratposition is a desktop environment that is key board only3 -
Should I buy more ThinkPads or poster board for stickers? I plan on buying 100s of stickers to put around my laptop and house.5
-
Some of you might appreciate this, thought I'd share.
I'm currently on the board for a new school, and one of the choices we've made is to require a basic software programming class (most likely python) in middle school or jr high.
As a board, we've decided that it serves a couple great purposes: teach critical thinking and understanding (even a little bit) how software is written, since that's the axis of the world.4 -
I love everything about the Nvidia Tx2 board...except the ARM64 architecture. Catch me constantly building shit from source :(
Seriously though, I wish there was just one, universal open source processor architecture standard to rule them all.1 -
someone brought something to school today, a "ac receiver" or "av receiver" or something? he pointed it at the board and turn it off, and i heard he opened someone's email with it? does anyone know what this could be?6
-
Arduino + breadboard power supply MB102.
Noob question I know, but how do I connect the power supply to the arduino? 5v to 5v and GND to GND? Or vin? Or the other first pin above res?
Help?
@Condor50 -
Silicon Valley. Imaging you burst ur balls to build your company. Burst ur mother fucking balls, and clits, to be big, best algo rhythm etc then the fucking board tells u ur fired???? Believe me, my company will have no mother fucking board members. Fuck. That!2
-
Here's my opening rant. Websphere Application Server...when restarting your JVM takes so long it should have its own epic on the task board.
#ThingsToDoWhileWASRestarts -
Finally my laptop is back and it's keyboard problem, thanks for official repair stop. Other two unofficial repair stops told me it's main board problem, FUXK THEM.
-
I'd like to make a board game (with cards essentially) with a web technology and take the occasion to learn a new tech.
For now I know pure js, jquery, java servlets, jsp, MVC5 and razor. I would like to learn something lean, new, powerful and useful in a job perspective. Any suggestions?9 -
Need a counter to play in a 2d game. 'Make it look 3d and good' they said. Fuck. Everything I do in Sketchup looks tacky AF. It's a piece to play on a white board with a black grid, like extended noughts and crosses. It doesn't need much.
Hello Microsoft Word, hello drawing tools, long time no see.1 -
guys, today i was playing monopoly with my father (not gone with the milk i swear) and he was beating me, so i flipped the board. he got pissed and angry, am i the asshole?
p.s, if u say im the asshole im gonna be super mean to u so say im not but no hard feelings.6 -
I need one of those CEO's kid jobs where you to a board meeting every 6 months and collect your trust fund2
-
Had a release retro today.
We had the usual Trello board with columns for "what went well, what was bad, what can we improve" etc.
columns for the bad and the improvements had 10-20 cards each.
column for what went well was empty.... -
Anyone do anything other than read the kanban board to the PM at the standup? Read it yourself and let me code dammit, I could change the columns those cards are in if you’d just let me.3
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I took 2 days off, just to be far away from sprint board and tasks.... And just after 2 hours of my 1st day I am end up continuing on my assigned task 🤦♂️2
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When you've been handling multiple production defects and software PMR tickets for the last couple of months and the morning of a new sprint your JIRA/SCRUM/Kanban/task/whatever board is empty under your name. Feels good man.
-
Being confused with technical support by everyone. I can guarantee
Even the person who wrote code for computers on board an ICBM would have been asked to help reset email passwords.
We are devs for God's sake. -
LIRR system rant 1- it's 5pm and train time app and station alert board says 4:55 is on time because they consider <6 minutes late 'on time' haha. How 'bout on time = on time! Hey devRant team - I would like to link to a picture of the alert board. Thanks
-
Anyone have experience with non ARM Single board computers like the LattePanda for a price of around 80$ - 100$? The Board should be a server with a bit more power but it should save electricity. We have already six RPi and two Banana Pis...
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Well at home I have a whiteboard and on that white board I make a list of things I want the code to do, don't do, and any ideas possible to emulate then I grab a cup of coffee turn on some music and start
-
Working on an automated deployment process as an aged programmer is tough! So I go outside feed the pigs, have a chat with them.
Back in, advice on board and I roll - solution solved! -
Thinking of working on a airbnb type marketplace but for private yachts and boats! Any input and backend ninjas wanting to jump on board?4
-
We are all working with our own computers. A new graphic designer comes on board and he gets a Dell XPS desktop and a large monitor...1
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Alternative for Control board (Display)???
So I took out the monitor of my old laptop ,and I'm planning on using it as my new secondary monitor. BTW I'm from Nepal, and it is not possible to find any control board available in market for the spare LCD.
So could anyone suggests me with an alternative for the control board for my spare monitor?
Thanks in advance.2 -
We use a bamboo cutting board in the kitchen. Sometimes it's bent a little through the middle and sometimes it's straight. I still don't know if it's a bug or feature.
-
!rant
Use BitBucket Cards to manage your issues as a Scrum Board. It makes your life way easier!
http://www.bitbucketcards.com/ -
i do the website for this association and had the urge to overhaul everything, implement decent architecture and security, getting rid of awful php/html mixture. considered everything pretty fly and after going live did some minor adjustments primarily in the admin section. like instead of selecting the last 100 logs, all from the last year.
turned out there were 16 logins to the site within the last year. two board member logins (one person). impressive considering all of the functionality for administering the association it was capable of even before the rework.
so we do need a website, everyone wants to be updated, board administration is annoying but fuck my software?
more visitors than all of my other projects though. -
Okay, I'm glad we're working with cutting edge technology, I love that, but module federation with micro front-ends has currently so many issues across the board that I feel we're working against it, not with it. It leaves us incapable to use vite or proper SSR.
Also, isn't it funny that we are basically reinventing iframes?
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