Fixed a two year old bug by deleting a bunch of code

And once again, Ikea has saved me a bunch of money!

You say: "We added AI to our product"
I hear: "We added a bunch more IF statements to our codebase"

Please do rename the "master" branch to "Führer". The umlaut will probably catch a bunch of applications that aren't UTF-8 ready.

Bug emerges

Print a bunch of stuff

Breakpoints

Crisis of confidence

Research obscure fundamentals of the language

See typo

Fuck.

Can't wait to read a bunch of stories about myself on this weeks rant.

When you move a bunch of cables you haven’t touched in a while, and underneath you find this 🥳
Guess I know what I’m taking to work on Monday.

Just received a bunch of awesome jetbrains stickers.

Got a graphing calculator in high school for math class. Needed to memorize a bunch of formulas, saw you could program them in the calculator with BASIC. Sold the program to other students, profit.

In a nutshell, i severely underestimated myself, applied to a bunch of places and now they all want to hire me. Oh well.

When you create a bunch of objects in Java and it crashes because you're used to the memory usage of C's structs.

git commit -m "did a bunch of stuff"

JavaScript is like lego, you can build almost anything with it. But if you don't know what you're doing, the result will be just a nonsensical bunch of fragments.

Instead of learning how CCS works I've been adding a bunch of floats in different directions until the layout looks alright. This has been going on for years.

A world leader...? What a bunch of horseshit... Learn from CNN how to put the wrong guy on the pedestal...

I don't know why people call themselves "Developers" when they really just download a WordPress theme and adds bunch of plugins without touching a single line of code.

What the hell is going on?

Had to give a 15 min presentation on web development. I somehow turned it into me giving a 1 hour lecture on ssl and end to end encryption to a bunch of accounting students 😅

So this bunch of idiots made this huge iOS app using lots of global variables, lots of spaghetti code and basically no separation between logic and UI.
Another bunch of idiots were told to take that iOS app and basically port it to Android. And they ported that same code mess, almost line by line, and adding some weird shit.
Now the HQ of the first bunch of idiots realize that the second bunch of idiots were too slow/inefficient/whatever, and they're now asking US to solve that Android mess and add another shitload of features.
The worst part of it, is that both bunches of idiots are still working on it, so we're basically forced to follow the same shitty style until the first deadline, otherwise we'd die suffocated by stinky merge conflicts. Which will happen anyway because our changes are going to overlap.
Oh, and the PM refuses to understand the disaster coming and there's six hours of time zone difference.

Fuck this shit.

People, what a bunch of bastards, especially the non-technical “educated” ones. We call them “mundanes” in our office.

Saying that Sharepoint was coded by a bunch of trained monkeys would be an understatement and an insult to monkeys. Why is it such a bloody mess? 😡

One thing I learned is never to ask a bunch of programmers if there is decaf somewhere.

1) Starts a company that builds cloud systems
2) Takes a bunch of jobs and thought you'll be happy for a while
3) IoT era smashes in your face
4) 72% of your existing clients ask for IoT revamp
5) With a lot of hacking you made a small portion of the projects possible with some Raspberry Pis
6) Client bought a bunch of arbitrary parts from Shenzhen and now you have to deal with kernel overlays and shits that you didn't even heard of
7) Made it work for the second time and told yourself it'll never happen again
8) Last customer happy so they tell a bunch of friends and now they're asking for more
9) Stares into void, wondering how you gonna end this nightmare

Great day! Resigned my job, signed my new job AND the stickers arrived! Thanks a bunch for making my day even greater than it was :) @dfox

Today is my birthday... apparently. Yes I didn't wake up going "Woo! Today's my birthday! I'm another year older!!!"

But I did get bunch of emails from recruiters, Fandango... So basically spam...

Worst hackaton? The one when i realized too late i was stuck with a bunch of kids bragging about being "devs" because they knew how to download an html template for wordpress 😭

"Why do you think we should delay launching the new site?"

Because it's late afternoon on a Friday.

"So? What does it matter?"

Here's a bunch of good reasons.

"Nah let's do it today anyways."

Decided to update my rooted Oneplus One...
Everything worked on the first try without even having to do a bunch of reboots...
Hate it when weird stuff like that happens.

This is how I explain client issues.

A dictionary is just a whole bunch of circular references.

*bunch of if statements*

Friend shouts proudly everywhere : I implemented an AI!

Me : but that's not how AI works

Friend : but it works just as an AI, so it is one, who cares?

😥

Found a bunch of these in my dad's old drawers. It's a mini floppy disk of 2 MB (i guess).

i found a bunch of stupid shit so why not share?

I found a bunch of my old c/++ projects and this one is funny to me for some reason

Currently watching a bunch of drunk Irish people try different whiskeys and drunkenly banter with one another, while myself sipping Irish whiskey. It’s nice.

Slàinte! 🥃

My dad is quite supportive.

After I graduated, he brought home a bunch of broken CPUs for me to fix.

Somewhere out there there are a bunch of dudes working to produce an a.i like system for sex dolls.

I just think that shit is funny.

Nvidia makes real time ray tracing and a ehole bunch of graphics stuff beyond our imagination but they can't make a linux driver that actually works well... For ducks sake

What a shame with asus. You open a new bought laptop and you see some bunch of CDs but your laptop doesn't have the CD reader. Priceless... :)

A client just sent me a bunch of screenshots of his old website, asking me to make a site that looks just like that. I declined.

Our CTO thinks that front end development is just “a bunch of html tags”

Don’t put pressure on yourself to understand everything. No single person understands it all, that’s why there’s a bunch of us.

Finding a bunch of "else if" instead of "switch"

Nobody:

Me: Let's buy a bunch of stickers

Some guy in my programming class just made a bunch of commits with only empty lines and a picture of Kim Jong-un...

I recently deleted a bunch of bookmarks from between 2002 and 2014. None of the websites even worked anymore.

We were having a conversation with a bunch of friends and somehow i came up with this

Ps, the data is valid

I think that since most of my work involves typing, my handwriting has gotten really bad. It looks like a bunch of worms...

People! What a bunch of bastards!

I think today GPDR kicked in?

Who else got a bunch of emails from services they don't use anymore saying they updated their Privacy Statement?

In every new job, you get this painful realization: "Oh God! I work with a bunch of morons!!"

Mum: can you look at my phone?
*bunch of random shit pops up all over the place*
Me: your phones got a bunch of viruses on it or something. You'll have to get it fixed
Her: can't you do it? You make apps. Can't you just make an app for me to fix my phone?
Me: I don't really make apps, besides that's kind of impossible.
Her: so what did you go to university for?
Me: -___-

They're finally here! Took about 2 months - from NY to Nepal. Thanks a bunch everyone!!

What a bunch of liars....Gmail still doesn't have all my "favorite Inbox features"!

I was asked to securely erase bunch of old HDD that are going to be recycled.

Don't you hate it when you come across a old internet argument but one of the people deleted all of their posts so now you just see a bunch of out of context replies.

is it just me or daily stand ups feels like a bunch of virgins sharing thier first time feelings and details ...

We should buy an island, build futuristic building/homes/everything, and then combine our coding power to create a bunch of crazy awesome stuff

I maintain a service that people are billed yearly for. A bunch of users just requested a new feature that will require me to build a completely new backend and change a bunch of things that will require a full rewrite of a couple different aspects of the service. I'm both excited and scared. Wish me luck.

I'm seriously having a lot of fun with ChatGPT and learning a whole bunch of things I didn't know before. The ease of asking it questions and getting a general idea on things is amazing.

Bye bye to my job, but at least I'll know a bunch of different things, I guess 😂

Look what I found with a bunch of my old stuff. Old school Linux.

Niantic need to hire a bunch of us a d some sysadmins, oh and some anti DDOS experts 😂

localhost, because it's always available even when I'm offline. The cloud is just a bunch of computers after all.

CUDA!!!! your documentation is a whole bunch of Wingdings you piece of **** !!

Thank you unixstickers, stickermule, and to the guy who posted it here in devrant about the $1 for bunch of stickers (sorry i forgot to ++ the post and can't find it anymore)

Sure, I learned a bunch in school, but you don't really start learning until the first shit storm happens on the job. Then you realize how much you still don't know!

When you finally see a series of ✓'s across all tests - today is a good day!

Now to write a whole bunch more that......, that dickhead past @C0D4 didn't do.

I just logged into my dad's computer and see a bunch of apps running in the background that seems very suspicious and like malware...

He's a developer and he makes like twice what I do...

It all started with a simple shell script that ran a bunch of build commands.
Then it became a python script that ran a bunch of build commands because why not?
Now it's becoming an electron app with a jazzy UI.. that runs a bunch of build commands. Because why not!

What a helpful error message, IDEA. Thanks a bunch...

> barges in
> slams massive unintelligible PR on the table
> fixes a bunch of tickets all at once
> won't explain how tf it works, it just does
> refuses to elaborate further
> leaves

Friend: Oh god! Are you sure you wanna eat that bunch of garlic?!

Me: Sure. I'm working backend.

Friend: Never mind.

Eclipse. That random moving huge bunch of panels. God.

I want to start a community of advanced cli devs, but, idk.

Y'know, a bunch of people who make shit like spotify-cli, devrant-cli, pornhub-cli, the sort.

How do you explain to a bunch of teenagers that their Smartphone/Tablet is, in fact, a computer?🤔😐😕

-Discovers new tech
-Follows the "getting started" page
-Spends hours to get the example project working
-Gets bunch of exceptions
-Cries

WINDOWS UPDATE JUST FUCKED MY LINUX PARTITION!!! Apparently, this is a common thing? I lost a whole bunch of stuff that I really wanted to keep :/

Aaaaand my home setup, featuring a bunch of electronics, an orange pi on the wall (the little orange led is a bitcoin ticker), a nintendo 2ds and a nico robin figurine

Client: Hey guys! Let us start a bunch of projects that are all dependent on each other and expect them to deliver those on time.

Me: WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK.

Does anybody know how can someone post a "good" question on Stackoverflow without having these bunch of programmers that say YOUR QUESTION WAS ALREADY ANSWERED FROM SOMEBODY IN ANOTHER GALAXY

Added a new feature. Saw no traffic. Removed it thinking no one liked it. Receive a bunch of angry emails.

I forgot to tag shit properly. FML.

I feel like the rise of ML was orchestrated by a bunch of angry nerds who decided to answer the question "Where will we use Calculus in real life?" with "EVERYWHERE."

Just casually learning if I don't fix a bunch of stuff I know nothing about in a technology I have never touched within 2 weeks the company loses a 100k contract.

Should book holiday.

Ha ha just this happened, One young man is building some shit on Wordpress with bunch of free plugins. And he said i'm a good dev. And he's login page load speed is 47 seconds.

Sometimes I like to look at my PR and think "Damn, that's some beautiful code, I can't wait for someone to review it".

Then the review comes and see a bunch of requested changes. =/

We’re only bunch of nand gates.

Lol!

Got 8 downvotes on stackoverflow and a bunch of comments saying I have to write code before posting a question...

Bunch of naggers out there

How to spot a developer in a bunch of people?

Just shout Python sucks!!

When you are waiting in the cold for first robotics with a bunch of devrant users and one of them complains about being cold.

If everything goes like the usual, my Valentine date will be a bunch of old code I need to refactor

Let's write an AI to be our next president. With machine learning, we can just train it with a bunch of history books.

Why is it that whenever I show someone the app I made that they always suggest a bunch of fucking idiotic features. What is bloody wrong with "Wow, cool app you made".

That moment when you edit the Todo list for your personal project, add a bunch of ideas and the proceed in procastinating like you did before and feel _very_ productive about it.

Typescript seems like such overkill, but then you need to refactor your code and hit a bunch of issues in production. I don't think I'll ever go without typescript again. Fuck dynamic typing, it doesn't scale

I hate when people call any sort of program that does anything even remotely intelligent looking “AI.” No, there is a very specific distinction between actual artificial intelligence, and a bunch of if-statements.

A bit random, but I decided to put a perpetual clock inside my illusion mirror with a bunch of LED's while it was slow at work today xD

My father gave me a task to make a GUI that stores bunch of records in a database

Bad: i got told that i need to stop playing overwatch @ work
Good: so they gave me a bunch of udemy courses

Apple guys are a bunch of liars and hypebeast darkmode hipsters yet we all follow this stupid cult.

When you ask a bunch of C programmers to make an application in Java you get a main function that is 1,125 lines long because who needs OOP anyways? amirite?

If I’m looking for a framework or tool and it doesn’t have any immediate code on the homepage, but rather just a bunch of marketing BS, fuck you I’m not using it

Trying to work with an API that has no response object (it just returns empty arrays if something breaks) and it's JSON is not key-value.. just a bunch of dynamic nested values. just wow.

After I went on vacation, I came back to find that my offshore team had refactored a bunch of my code, tripling the size of it and grossly over-complicating the flow... ugh.

Oh my god, this client. Everything is equally important. When finishing a feature halfway, a new future gets priority. Nothing is finished, this whole app is a bunch of loose ends. FML.

My wallpaper is a little fishy!

I've loved marine life for a long time. I finally downloaded a bunch of oceanic Unsplash photos for my wallpaper. It's awesome.

When a bunch of unit tests start failing locally because the AWS secret key got rotated.
oh wait...
THOSE AREN’T UNIT TESTS!!!
Unit tests do not depend on any external system, that includes AWS...
AAARRGHHHHH

Yugioh decks became so damn cheap, im really tempted to order a bunch and put together 2-3 good ones.

Don't you just love it when people in an organisation enable micromanagement because they're a bunch of fucking corporate simps?

I love when teachers know nothing about technology and when something closes, or in their mind “their pc breaks”, they hit a bunch of random buttons or keys and make it worse.

A bunch of pictures of friends, a train dev duck, a wooden train toy, a pair of demon horns, a tiny hand

Why did the Linux distros find it hard to get laid?

Because they are a bunch of Unix.

Indian priminister modi is popular in coding realm too... i c bunch of modifier (modify, modification) now and then

Let's build this form out of a bunch of divs and <a> tags, instead of, oh, I don't know, ACTUAL FORM ELEMENTS?!

Anyone that tells you "jquery is stupid" is either a pro or obviously hasn't tried to do drag and drop with the html5 api.

What a pain in the fucking ass bunch of boilerplate bullshit.

Anyone else just nest a bunch of ifs and loops and feel absolutely disgusted but it works so you don't want to refactor it?

While we are a mixed race bunch of nerds. We do google a lot.
And boy do I get errors in my code!

When you are seeing a video tutorial and the guy remove a bunch of code that you didn't notice, and unconsciously you press 'ctrl+Z'

It's Friday evening, so time to drink a whole bunch of booze.

What are you drinking tonight? I'm on vodka and orange, but probably switching to beer shortly.

Designing a framework: design the framework. Have a bunch of drinks. Try use the framework. Sober up and examine how you’ve butchered it.

Adjust the framework.

What kind of a fucking idiot mixed two templates into one shortcode and added a bunch of if's to print the logic?

Ffs WordPress.

Lets be honest guys.
We all pretend to be Richard but we are just a bunch of "Big Heads". And some of you guys fuck.

When you add a bunch of entity framework relationships in code, and it works the first time... Wtf.

Hey guys, my gf and I want to do something with the Arduino we got. We are getting a CS degree, so programming is not a problem, but we have quite basic knowledge of electronics.

What could be a cool simple (but not too introductory) project we could do?

The arduino came with a bunch of sensors (ultrasonic distance sensor, humidity, ...) some input (joystick, RFID reader/writer, buttons) and some outputs (LCD display, 8x8 LED matrix, bunch of color and RGB leds).

Thank you, Slack

Learn More is just a bunch of unsolicited instructions

Anyone else think all this stock market volatility is just a whole bunch of algorithms going crazy?

today is the day i will write a bunch of passive agressive redmine tasks with fucking steps to reproduce the fucking bugs and fucking info on the fucking environment of the fucking bug! i mean you have the time and skills to attach bunch nonsence screenshots with color coded arrows and circles, carefully cropping out info i could actually use, like the fucking url and browser, but you cannot consolidate your thoughts well enough to write down the steps that led to a bug??? fuck these people

Okay I lied, I'm having a bunch of bottles of Guiness now.

Finally the sweet release from the pain 😋

So third party devs that my employer hired to build our web based application used fucking spaghetti jQuery to validate all of it with no documentation. What a bunch of cunts.

Fuck I've been making a bunch of simple mistakes lately. It's like I'm having issues thinking clearly.

"XYZ is an API that allows you to throw a bunch of stuff at it, and it will generally do the right thing" - best documentation ever!

git stash pop'd on wrong branch, hadn't realized it until after a bunch more work. Then continued screwing things up and unit tests are failing.

This is not a good coding day.

Ok so, why not. Let us send a bunch of sms tests, they are cheaper than push notifications, right?

The customer wanted a calendar view that somehow contained data about fucking everything.

Ended up looking like a bunch of trash icons on a calendar

Are vi/vim users vegans of dev community? Can we also add emacs users to the list? Bunch of degenerates if you ask me... 🤗

Large apps are just a bunch of small simple features

Me on getting a huge bunch of merge conflicts!! 😵

Learning C# for internship and while eating i explicitly called the waitress and ordered different bunch of foods using a delegate.

Building games for people to whom the expression "game design" evaluates to "game UI design", which a fancier way to say "a bunch of static slides with arbitrary screenshots"

When you use Google Search Suggestions to check if you most likely spelled something right, and you get a bunch of weird autocompletions that you understand nothing of.

Anyone else type a bunch of gibberish after typing a word you don't think you know how to spell just to make sure that spell check is working? Just me?

Bunch of freelancers invented new Git flow 😂🤣

You know what I had to deal with
A bunch of these shit
try{
//Shitty cluster fuck excuse for java
//code
}catch(Exception e){

}

Modifying Microsoft Windows with bunch of undocumented functions.....

And integrating CZenter to it.....

^v^

when the release date is may 31 and the client thought it's a good idea to request a bunch of new features and changes in friday afternoon :)
Tomorrow is gonna be a fun birthday...

Need to do some PHP for my class next week, problem is I hate PHP so I just distracted myself and wrote a bunch of Ruby code today...

I just realized I didn't make my first post a hello world post and I just threw away a bunch of potential upvotes. Hopefully it's not too late. Hello world!

Final update!

It is now 7:50 PM and I'm finally done. I did procrastinate a bunch throughout the day but it worked out in the end!

But seriously, I should stop being this lazy...

Our guy pushing out the build of our ASP.net site:
"I got a bunch of errors, so I switched the projects .Net version, then I got different errors"...

Actually every project we learns something. Consider like, In very recent one project,
First time used bunch of bean classes with layered structure and JS mixture. Had fun and given me confidence for interview. Happy ;)

I discovered @media(hover:hover){} today. Needless to say I have a bunch of animated cards with “Hover over me!” or “Click me!” rendered based on whether there’s hover support.

I'm Indonesian and really feel suck about our government apps. Seriously, I think they hire a bunch of undergraduate student to make most of their apps. Anyone who feel the same about your government?

The sounds coming from the support department remind me of a bunch of high schoolers:

Crying, Yelling, and Bitching about everything under the sun.

If you hate your job so much, GTFO 🤔

When an app repeatedly crashes, has a bunch of open bugs and you think.

"Oh just give me the code I'll fix it myself!"

Quickly followed by the realisation that you're now channelling a young RMS...

Happy Valentine's day you bunch of lonely sods. 😂

(Don't worry, I'm lonely too 🙃).

I got a bunch of newbies deploying to production this week. Should be fun watching everything BURN!

(I am on standby)

installed PiHole.... it blocks some ads, but I'm still getting a bunch of ads.... : (

Thought : God the Programmer

Life is huge bunch of programming code written by God. Where the flow of control depends on how you resolve conditions.

Watched westworld. Signs up for a bunch of AI classes.

A bunch of people who know a bunch of frameworks but lack intrinsic understanding CS, therefore bringing the degeneration of overall quality.

This ultimately leads to:

1- shitty dev jobs (the future blue-collar job, always in risk to be automated)
OR
2- super high-end dev jobs (most likely AI engineering, devops, data science)

As generations pass, this shapes out a whole new world economy.

I'm starting to hate people. What a bunch of bastards

Spent a bunch of time debugging an off-by-one error. At least I was only a bit off.

Hey, I just got myself a bunch of assorted stickers for cheap, but don't know what those two are.

Can someone identify them?

just saw a bunch of people trying to catch Pokemon and realised what my life has come down to. I deleted the game from my phone. I'm anti social and always will be.

I remember there being someone on here who documented their progress on building their own sex robot with a bunch of Arduinos or something.

Who was that again? Are they still here?

I just downloaded a bunch of code editors. Ive been using VSC for a long time, and im looking if I should switch. Which one are you using, and why? 😊

When you end up continuing someone else's project and saw a bunch of undone TODOs....
5 years ago!!

I am trapped at Dave and Busters with a bunch of kids. I can't drink cause I have to drive them home.

Just bought bunch of garbage. My girlfriend will be happy! :D (sarcasm)

Me: so we've added bunch of features to our app so that everything updates live automatically and you can edit it online and sort and filter and do bunch of other stuff.

Boss: great, how do I export it to xls?

If I had a penny for everytime I've heard "you devs are a funny bunch."
...

Found a bunch of topics to start writing blogs with 👍

The weekend is finally over, I have updated my Web Proxy and built an entire blog to post on and applied for a bunch of ad-networks.

I think I have been rather productive ☺

Least favorite enterprise software... Oh I have a bunch of them that I actually still work with but I'll mention 3
Sharepoint
Clearcase
Timweb

the struggle when you start a bunch of coursera courses at the start of vacations and in the end you are at the introduction of the course video.

I hate it when someone says ist all documented, but its just a bunch of old crappy word documents with mostly unusable information in it...

Instead of one recycled image here's a bunch!

Just before deploying this to prod found this bug... discover this bug with bunch of print statements

Bleh, the game awards winners are a bunch of console hand-me-downs, or console exclusives. Fuck AAA games.

As of today I have said “fuck Oracle bunch of money grubbing fuck twats”. What a day.

Well I never got to program in a group during school, but the coolest stuff I learned in general was a bunch of networking exercises.

Not sure an anti social bunch as us developers are would make too much use of it, but is there a PM feature planned for devRant?

You have all this power your ancestors never ever dreamed about to command every machine that uses a random bunch of characters at your fingertips and you do what?

A dating app!

TFW a bunch of pages have their own "template" because the content is hardcoded in.

A big hurdle I'm fighting for last 1 year, is to convince a bunch of people having 10+ years of experience not to make production released of the same codebase from multiple branches.

Managing dependencies with npm or yarn feels like trying to communicate with a bunch of hipster kids. "Ugh omg I no longer hang in that namespace like that was so two weeks ago"

When you spend a couple days cleaning up and refactoring a bunch of classes, then someone else comes in and places needless and empty return's at the end of every method 😒🔫

if anyhow is so good and important why isn't it part of the std

I just can't with this

I don't wanna download a bunch of unnecessary libraries just because people were lazy

Stepped away from the computer after doing a bunch of work with a bunch of programs open. Come back to find it rebooted itself AGAIN with no prior warning despite my having set preferences to keep it from doing so. Son of a ...

Anyone do any development in WordPress? It's like trying to override a bunch of plugins made by a bunch of developers.

Like the Unyson plugin puts a stupid non-removable notification to install a bunch of crap with a generic class name with !important.

So what did I do? I looked through the source code and found a non-used hook I can tap into and remove the message!

What a beautiful bunch of incompetent morons 🌞🌞🌞

CSS devDuck and a bunch of ridiculously expensive medications

Just finished importing over 70,000 rows with a bunch of joins onto a data warehouse for billing purposes. all done thanks to SQL alchemy and python. I feel like a boss.

Damn writing api documentation is such a pain, I am following bunch of flow at the same :(

Nothing's favorite anymore. I work on a bunch of things and I don't see myself succeed in any of them.

Life sucks. Everything sucks.

// Make this less shitty

// Repair later

// Clean up and make it less half asses

Those are my 3 laziest things I end up doing in a bunch of my progra

I am messed up at installing a bunch of server app in proxmox, messed up the config, privileges etc.

Guess i need to start over -_-

I have a bunch of text files from writing that I did in a copy of DOS software called WordPublisher from 1992. When I open them in TextEdit or Sublime on a Mac, there are a bunch of special characters, some of the readable text, and then more special characters. The software just doesn't exist anywhere in any format now. Anyone know how I can recover the full text from a file like that?

I met 2 of my friends on the job, we we're on the same team. We supported each other. We drank a bunch. We all went out a bunch. Those 2 friends started dating. Then we all decided to be roommates, because why not. 5 years later, we're still roommates and none of us work at the company we started at.

That moment when the code that was supposed to be removed in only commented out!!! The guy butchered a bunch of classes by commenting out about 1000 lines of code

I was away for a few months and this place has turned from a witty little corner I loved to a whole bunch of blog posts of rambling lunatics!

Laravel Excel is shit and has shit documentation as well. PHPExcel may not be as pretty as a bunch of callbacks but it's more efficient and actually gets the job done.