Getting married tomorrow!!!
Holy shit!!

I'm kind of scared actually. But in a good way 😄

And here I am, in the middle of the night, trying to figure out why my fucking tests don't run 😄

Last hour of my job today:

Hardstyle blasting out of the speakers at full volume

Everyone drinking a beer

Boss coming in with "Fuck this shit we're gonna game!"

This is what I call a good end of the work week 😍

Ooooooh I just skip a heart attack and shit myself at the same time, thank god for error "can not delete database, database is in use"

Brain: hey kiddo, want to stay home and work on your side project today? I'm feeling good.
Me: fuck yeah finally!

*call in sick.
*open laptop. Tabs and editors already waiting.
*play music, no sound.
*system is all laggy.
*fuck, restart.
*
*Installing windows updates...

*leaves for work.

When our sales guy came by for the 200000000000th time on a day to boast about how good he advised someone on a sales related matter.

Mate, we're Linux engineers and currently trying to fix shit up so why don't you get yourself a cup of shut the fuck up.

> be me
> want to write troll "viruses" to fck arround with frieds
> write batch files
> shit everyone can see what I do
> google 'how to make exe'
> install VS
> google 'make exe with vb.net'
> spend 3hr/s copying the Internet
> send friend exe
> blocked by antivirus
> write other bullshit
> actually learn stuff
> shit I'm kinda good at this
> keep going
> 4 years later
> be system administrator / devop / web dev / app dev / desktop dev
> get paid
> inb4 wants to troll friend - finds dream job instead

Love how a teacher of mine described IO wait for CPUs on a blackboard.
"That's calculation time." *draws three small lines on the blackboard* And this is IO wait. *draws a really long line, goes out of the class, out of the school, comes back* "Yes, this is IO wait. No matter how good and fast your CPU in your gaming PC is, if your hard drive is shit, everything is shit."

"Look I found a good use of this piece of shit printer"

*accidentally clicks Visual Studio Code icon*

FUCK

Oh boy.... Here we go again.

Got the shit?

Me to wordpress "developer"

- No, you are not a developer, you just drag and drop shit in visual composer

That felt good

I wrote my resignation letter yesterday, all’s good.

Today, bossman walks in:
“I’ve got some great news, all our developers are getting a raise”

Me: *well shit*

Broke my glasses in half.
Not being able to see shit i took my 3D glasses apart and ziplocked my glasses lenses on the 3d glasses frame. Been using this version of my glasses for a good one and a half year. Yeap

You know you're doing good shit when the chinese start copying it. 😎

Holy shit this UI/UX/Whatever looks good! Wish all apps could look this good. ++ to the Firefox App designers!

PHP sucks balls,
It takes forever to do anything, it is so messy it feels like walking through a massive pile of shit!

Ok good I have your attention and that ++ 😇

But no this is not that kind of rant, quite the opposite.

In 70 lines of php shit as some people would call it, I am currently scrapping GitHub pages with ebook collections and with some minor regex pulling PDFs out and saving them to file.

So there it fucking goes.

Hi. I'm WillibertXXIV.
I'm not a programmer by trade; I have a more than fulltime job as a cook. As for the last year, I spent pretty much all my free time, overlapping my sleep time, to learn how to code.

All that so I can create a game that I started working on the same day I started my learning process. So far it's shit and it's going to stay that way for a long time. Only I can say this. It's my baby. It's fucking ugly and shit but it's mine.

Yesterday I broke it. I broke my baby. I don't know how it fucking happe. When I went to sleep I had a steady 175fps, nice realtime lightning and player / enemy that flowed like running water. I worked really hard to make that happened. Profiling, writing better code, profiling, etc. It's still not good, it's less shit.

I woke up, beautiful day. Not too warm, not too cold, that sweet spot right in the middle. Girlfriend already made the coffee. Perfect. Woke up, sat down to start my morning time work before going to my realjob and

BAM

Everything is shit, 20fps max. That one thing, gfx.waitforpresent, showing up in the profiler eating everything as the game run. Movements are now of stroboscopic nature. Light is still ok but what good does it do now fucking piece of shit. I'm not qualified enough for this shit.

Fuck,
Fuck this,
Fuck this shit,
Fuck this shit i'm out of here.

That moment when the resident IT guy/teacher at your school comes to you at lunch and you look sad.
Me: Hello.
Teacher: What happened?
Me: Batteries almsot dead :(
Teacher: Well, I've got good news for you. I was talking to the school director about you.
Me: Um ... shit
Teacher: We're looking to get you an intership at the company that does networking shit for us (Netcom, anybody?)
Me: FUCK YEAH ... thanks!
*Day brightened by angelic light*

PM finds my prized stress ball and draws a face on it. When asked why she said "it looked depressed".

THATS THE LOGO YOU DUMB BITCH. PLEASE DON'T TOUCH MY SHIT

On the bright side... Good thing I have this stress ball to relieve my anger 😒

Today was the first time I told a rude interviewer off. Feels pretty good. Fuckwad kept cutting me off with “Shut up and just answer my question”. Nope. Not taking that shit my good sir.

Dear Microsoft,

What kind of braindead fucking moron thought that implying that dragging the mouse ever so slightly within the same folder with files selected MUST mean that the user wants to copy shit?!

What kind of braindead fucking moron thought that making conhost use Return for copying text and right click for pasting it was a good idea, and make the keybinding unmodifiable?!!

What kind of braindead fucking moron designed this shitty abomination of shit OS?!

Annoyingly typical office conversation:

Person 1: "Good morning."
Person 2: "Good morning, how are you?"
Person 1: "Good. How are you?"
Person 2: "Good."
Person 1: "Good."

NO! Not good, fuckers. I hear this all day long, come up with something real or original. Talk about the massive shit you just took, or how hard you're taking the news about Diablo Immortal. It reminds me of that scene in Office Space with the repetitive call center lady, lol.

Why I love devRant? Cause it redirects me to my good old browser after clicking on a link instead of open such a f*****g build in shit!

When your boss says "good job, you have developed something big in such a small time" (~2 weeks) but you haven't showed him the bugs and shit (gonna fix it btw)

Well, I made a choice in life.

I'm going to stay and work in America after I graduate. In spite of all the shit talking I've done about its work ethics, benefits, politics, and culture.

This place is still home.

After trying out a trip to Europe for a few weeks I can't handle the idea of being 4,500 miles away from family and what few friends I have. I figured out what was true the whole time: I wanted to run away from my past. Breakups, a failed marriage proposal, a dead end job that I put up with only because I need to graduate. I've been angry and depressed over these things, but running away won't fix it.

I need to face reality and own up to it. I'll get a job as a developer in the states through hell or high-water.

Well, basically

• Coworkers that know their shit
• A boss that once coded/still codes
• A management that consists of people that coded/code
• A pay that's good enough for me to afford more than just a place to live, food and water.

!rant
I was told to take a day's rest without putting in a leave because of the number of hours I've been putting in. And for beating the shit out of deadlines.

Damn it feels good to be appreciated!

After a little I'm having huge issues with my new phone. No custom ROMs available.

Fuck this shit I'm going to try to port another Mediatek based ROM to my phone tonight.

I'd rather get a bricked device than working with this piece of shit vendor made android system.

The phone itself other the the software is very good though!

Umidigi programmers, go fuck yourselves.

There's nothing like getting a angry client calling at 9am about their site being broken because their shit for brains son was messing around with my PHP.

They were legit cursing at me about how unprofessional and shit i was. Good start to the day.

Late night coding and my last git message is "changed a shit load of stuff...don't worry I got this"

Good thing this a personal project haha

I've been slowly adding emojis into all my scripts and tools, as we use 16.04 they don't show up when people are running stuff, can't wait till the company upgrades to 18.04 and their terminals are filled with

👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

Once one of my coworkers tried to prank me while i was afk and changed a line in my code.
Good old habits of mine instantly realized the file's unsaved status and i could ctrl+z without even knowing someone edited my code.

Don't mess with a developer. We know our shit.

I resigned today 😍
No more dealing with shit architecture and experimental beta technologies being used in production which went down constantly 😎
Back to good ol' product development! 🤩
One month notice period to go

Took me hours to set this shit up and finally everything is clean and ready for work

Thank you

Good luck💦little one💦

I always wanted to have comments in JSON files, but I just discovered a really good alternative:
{
"//": "This is a comment",
"somekey": "somevalue"
}

Looks kinda ugly but it works! No need for special unconventional parsers and shit.

[1 year ago]

Fren: Make me web design

Me: Sure credit me or pay me whatevs

[Literally makes a good web design, I could've uploaded on dribble or shit]

[Gives it to fren, takes full credit on his own]

Me:

How motherfucking difficult can it be to port forward something internally?!

I've been on this for fucking hours and I'm so fucking done with this shit.

I know I'm doing something wrong myself but I can't find a good resource 😠

When you really aren't that good at competitive programming, but get invited to a week+ - long fully paid for programmer camp in another country because everyone else is even more shit 😊

I'm making multiplayer minesweeper using NodeJS and so far so good but I can NEVER FUCKING FOCUS ENOUGH. Like damn, I should be way further along with this shit.

Random profesional behavior reminder:

The fact that you're obviously from a minority doesn't automatically make you non-racist. Specially, it doesn't give you immunity for being racist towards other minorities.

Just saying! Be racist outside of office hours, if you can. Or just... Keep that shit to yourself. 💩

Do you want an app completed for tomorrow?
It will be a shit.
Do you want a very good app?
You won't have it tomorrow.

Clients and bosses will never learn it...

Oh you want my homework Solutions?

WELL NO! YOU WONT GET MY SOLUTIONS YOU PRICK! YOU ALWAYS TREAT ME LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT! I WONT GIVE IT TO YOU!!
AND I DONT FUCKING CARE ABOUT YOUR SHITTY GRADES! THEY ARENT MINE! AND YOU KNOW WHY?! BECAUSE I DO MY FUCKING HOMEWORK AND IT PISSES ME OFF TO ALWAYS GET REQUESTS FOR MY FUCKING SOLUTIONS! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, PUT IT IN A BAG AND TAKE IT TO THE SHIT STORE!
WHY?!
BECAUSE I DONT CARE! THATS WHY! DO YOUR HOMEWORK!
AND MAKE GOOD GRADES!
BYE!!

HOLY SHIT
I JUST STARTED DJANGO
ITS SOOOOOOO GOOD

GOODBYE PHP YOU WONT BE MISSED

1.
!dev

Found a gray hair and plucked it. 😢 I'm too young for this shit. Whyyyyy oh god whyyyyy.

2.
Linux 5.8 has been breaking my shit. Like, keyboard and track pad stop working. Apparently, a fn key is to blame. Fixed it for now, but can Linux kernel fuck off? I can't have my system break so often. This is the third time I'm reverting or man handling the shit in the last two months.

3.
I need a good expensive fucking vacation. 😢 And a dedicated eye candy (gender doesn't apply) to keep in my line of sight. Maybe then I can recover.

4.
The last 7 days were an emotional rollercoaster. Specifically, from work perspective. I need many hugs. Like, real hugs. Also need good food. 😢

5.
Overall, I shouldn't be stressed but shit is not going great. 😭😭😭

The Humble bundle currently offers a bunch of Linux related books. Some gimp shit, and some blender shit.

The thing is, they have the Linux Programming interface by Michael Kerrisk for 30 dllrs(in total for everything)

Ladies and gents, that right there is a DAMN good deal. That book is fucking gold. Used it during Uni, didn't get to keep it. 30 bucks for a bunch of pdfs, ebook and mobi plus a book that for itself is worth more? Shiet son. It will pump up both your Linux and C chops I would tell ya that much.

I'd made that deal.

What about you Utivich, you'd made that deal?

Utivich: I'd made that deal.

I don't blame you. DAMN GOOD deal.

I can't breathe good air anymore. Water is being wasted. Fossil fuels are being wasted. Unnecessarily high number of vehicles on roads and most them have fucking one person sitting in them. They take out a fucking vehicle for fucking 200m. People throw trash everywhere without any regard for cleanliness. Prices are going up. Inefficient shit pieces exist in the market and people buy that shit. The world is going to hell. I hope I die soon enough to not know that is has.

Being a good developer is knowing how to balance writing perfect code with getting shit done. Working lean means half your stuff in going to die anyway, so fighting for the corpse just wastes everybody's time

"If you use a css framework splat splat splat splat bullshit bullshit bullshit"

Listen fam, I write apps that a good portion of the time will be used internally by the company I represent or work for. They don't give 2 flying fucks if I write an entire webpack ecosystem for them to push out assets and 10k outher bs shit in to their frontend end. They just care that shit connects properly to their backend and it spits out the information they need, which 9 times out of 10 does not require a lot of the shit y'all cry about.

Bootstrap will suffice, bulma will suffice. I don't neckbeard over simple shit like this.

Just got a new work laptop last week. An upgrade from a crappy consumer grade piece of shit to a proper business grade 8c/16t laptop feels good.
Also Fedora.

I like being self taught because I can work at my own pace and try different languages to see what interests me most. But so many of these tutorials are just shit. Or the content is good and the instructor is shit. I may need to just suck it up and go to Uni, but I am 19 and enjoy my time working and my free time. I think it's time for me to grow up soon though.

The meeting where I was thrown under the bus by my colleagues for "not making enough progress" and removed from the project. It's all good though. That project was a piece of shit and now I'm doing something I actually enjoy with a group of people I actually like.

Me : *writes code and feel good about the result and quality *
Code reviewer : Dafuq is this shit

*Me seeing a good rant on devRant.
Wow I have a good thoughts I should comment on it..
*Open Rant, 76 comments (started to be related to the content then won't anymore, jokes and internal jokes)

Oh shit, it'll be useless.. *continue scrolling

What is this, what the fuck is this shit?!!
Are you actually serious Google? Android Studio my ass...
The compat joke is a good one...

I swear...in enterprise...doing things right is almost pointless. First off they punish you for it by insisting you use shitty outdated libraries and resources, making every request painful and a week long, and telling you "don't use any design patterns or good practices because the over seas third party people we hired won't understand it".

And ultimately those third party people are going to get a hold of your code and turn it to shit. So really...other than having pride and standards...just pile more shit on top of the other shit because it will all be shit soon enough.

IT Head: Hey, can you check out why application X isn't working? I've already restarted it and it isn't working anymore.

Me: sure.

Me 20 mins later: hey, looks like it is all good, website is normal, server resources are normal, etc...

IT Head: no no, the windows sync app isn't working.

Me inside: are you fucking kidding me you piece of stupid shit? Quit IT for good and die.

git reflog, git reflog...git FUCKING reflog!!!! Ah fuck this, I'm taking the kids out. 3hrs later.... Oh shit, i was in the wrong directory. A good fresh air clears the mind.

The Ballmer Peak applies to gaming too. Poured myself a glass of gin&tonic, then started playing csgo and drank after each time I died. For science.

Holy shit I'm good at this game.

I just read two rants with round about 40 fucking inside.

No I feel better after a fucking shit day.

Want to say thank you for your fucking good rants.

👍😁

Lenovo, you dumb fuck cunts.
How the fuck did you think it might be okay to ship a laptop with a BROKEN FUCKING WLAN DRIVER??????
This piece of shit doesn't even have RJ45 anymore.
And also who shit in your empty cavities where your brains should be when you thought it was a good thing to disable booting from anything but the main windows partition? My Mint installer stick works on any and everything I have ever tried him with except for this.

Good documentation is always a fucking good experience man.

And I particularly like how the Vue.js documentation is laid out. Straight up the framework is:
Easy to use
Concise
Has a lot of sane ideas
Good separation of concerns
Good Typescript integration
A really good cli tool

And above all this good shit is the documentation. Of all the major JS fronted tools I would say that this one is the one i like working with the most all in account of how easy to find the shit that I need is. Have built some otherwise complex shit using nothing more than documentation....albeit i have done this with most frontend shit i use.

Ok so it's not a good SSD for PC's then... Fucking hate how many YouTubers so this shit just for SEO

Well I’ve decided to create this... the code still shit though, when its good i’ll put it in devRants collab

Writing a game from scratch is a good way to see how awful you are as a programmer, specially if you come from webdev.
Amazing how fast your code looks like shit when you're writing a game, even the simplest one.

THIS FUCKING DEBUGGER IS IGNORING MY FUCKING BREAKPOINTS

GO TO HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT

AND RSPEC: FUCK YOUR LIMITED METHOD HIT-COUNTING BULLSHIT! ONE HIT-COUNT PER METHOD FOR THE ENTIRE SPEC IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH!

FJA;KLGAKLGJFKSDHG

My compartmentalizing skill is not good enough. Wasted last night by doing nothing and falling asleep because of a bad mood. I have shit tons of tasks.

I fucking HATE when people tell me:
"Oh you are using Unity? What kind of dumb shit uses Unity! Isnt its only purpose to make shovelware and shit?!"
THIS MAKES ME FURIOS AT MOST POINTS! AND I WANT TO PUNCH THOSE DIPWIT COCKS WHO ALWAYS THINK ANYTHING OTHER THAN UNITY IS GOOD, IN THE FUCKING FACE! TWICE!
unity isnt just for SHOVELWARE and CHEAP SHITGAMES, it has some really good potential when in the RIGHT FUCKING HANDS!! FOR FUCK SAKE!
(If you want an example look up dronethegame.com currently in crowdfunding) FUCK THESE PEOPLE...

FUCK

Sometimes am really pissed off with stack overflow, it won't let you comment if you have less points.
Its like yeah, you can make an answer with every stupid shit possible but no, you can't comment or get any good author's attention, he might be meditating -_-

What kind of fucktard thought it was a good idea to include html in their API endpoint? 3€ per 1000 requests? YOU should be the one paying me to deal with this shit. Even enforcing class classnames...

WTF is the point a
of auto-generated documentation. Some dude litterally thought it was a good idea to read the code and write the exact same shit differently. WTF IS THE POINT!?

Documentation takes work, sorry, stop being lazy.

A good morning shit without a 'deadline'.

Legit considering quitting my job and going back to my old workplace.

Fucking getting real tired of fucking around with html and css on the daily.

The school is fucking crashing down on our shitty as web services. But my manager (as much as we love her) is forcing everyone to double time on a rather stupid project that keeps constantly changing on the daily.

I am so fucking tired of it

Docker and kubernetes might be about the biggest boost in productivity that we have had as developers in the last fucking century and I can't speak well enough for theres technoligies.

FUCK ME this shit is good, this shit is great and this shit is NEEDED.

FUCKING LEARN THIS TECH

On a completely unrelated note......Love Death and Robots is on Netflix and shit is sooo good it ain't funny.

10/10 would recommend.

Just completed Object oriented JavaScript course and I have to say, the creaters of JS must have smoked some good shit before they the came up with this clusterfuck.

Dear Apple, why not make Swift good instead of a piece of shit? Just a thought.

Any one else’s kinda enjoy the process of removing tech debt? always thought it felt good to rip out old shit to put in shiny new shit

Don't you feel sometimes like you may not be as good dev as you think you are? Like all you do is search for chunks of code in stackoverflow so you can assamble a semi functional project.

I'm having one of those days, and it just feels like shit.

Yours truly is gonna get published again (probably, most likely) but has to get their shit together and write faster because deadlines.

Send good vibes plz. I've been lazy lately.

I walked into the office.
Following the usual morning words spit out, more undead then awake.
"Good morning, jada, jada."
I'm placing my backpack on my desk.
Now opening the case with the notebook.
I grab the notebook as usual.
*crack*
Shit.
Now I'm holding the battery pack in hands. My notebook still chills in my backpack.

FUCKING FUCK SHIT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? CURSES ON THE MANUFACTURER OF THAT PIECE O' SHIT!

Based on what I learned so far in the UX course, the UX textbook we learn from is utter shit. Who the fuck thought that using huge blocks of cyan color is a good idea?

Unpopular opinion: having a good shit tops bad sex.

I was talking to a friend of mine(more of an acquaintance really) about our shared interest in Go and how I am trying to see if I can implement it more and more into my daily activities(simple CLI utilities, maybe a web app or two) and he mentioned how much he likes it after being part of a Java shop for such a long time. He said that he got tired of the verbosity of Java and how Go was such a "breath of fresh air"

var i SomeShit
do.SomeShit(&i)
if do.Error != nil {
panic(do.Error)
}
fmt.Println("Could not agree at all")

On how bullshitty it is to say that one switched over to Golang because of the verbosity of other languages, specially when anything meaningful that you might do with the code requires constant checking.
And let us not

forget := lol.bullshit(); forget != nil {
about some of the other bs you get to do
oh look scoped errors
}

.....like I get it man. I like the language, no, It ain't replacing C or C++ for low level shit, not with a garbage collector are you fucking high?
But yes, I do like the language, they got a lot of shit right, the thing is, I feel like I know everything about it already since A) shit is way too simple, simple enough to be used by anyone really and B) other than goroutines this language does not really bring anything new to the table, far as I can tell.

I mean shit. I thought I was at odds with Python disliking syntactical whitespace enough to make me try and not use an otherwise perfectly good lang(Python I love you but hate syntactical whitespace) but Golang really puts me at odds. I love it but dislike it at the same time.

Shit recruiters say:
"We need solution experts, not language experts, because a language is just a tool."

Well then, good luck with your spaghetti code solution.

Mac suddenly stopped working. Came to know motherboard is gone & the price to get it changed is around 60k.

Fuck you Apple. Never buying the shit again. Though one good thing came out of it ;it used to be my work machine too & now I'm chilling from last 4 days.

Fuck it.

If Torvalds completely steps down and shit starts to absolutely suck in our beloved kernel then it might be high time to start paying close attention to Minix or Hurd :P options peeps. Options are good.

Christmas 🌲 party at work tonight. It's going to be boring since we are only 9 staffs.

Please give me a good reason so I can ditch this party? The best one I have so far is "I have shit in my pants. going home to cleanup and change. I will come back."

Azure is a big pile of shit.
Fuck you Microsoft. The only thing they are good at is consisently making bad things.

one gotta love Cordova piece of shit -.-
Tested app on browser all is good, deployed on phone and that shit wasn't able to access internet, turned out I needed another cordova plugin for this shit to work.

XCode, I'm sorry bro you are much less pain than cordova :(

1) Read the wiki on git. I probably have enough shorthands and test methods that you won't need much other shit to debug issues.

2) when debugging, remember that if it is there, there's a good reason why I put it there.

3) commented-out code is probably useful for maintenance. I left it there for a good reason. 😛

4) chances are whatever I wrote, was the state of the art at the time I wrote it. There might be better ways to do it now tho.

5) I always work modular. First, understand the structure. (probably also documented on wiki) DO NOT fuck up the structure. If you change it, you document it.

6) If you feel I wrote shit, it's probably because management annoyed the living shit out of me. Pun intended.

7) Your confusion is normal. I don't do dumb shit.

I only created a fucking class, a FUCKING EMPTY CLASS

Cancel button does nothing, obviously.
After 30 seconds or so, everything is back to normal. This shit reminds me of the "good old days" with Eclipse.
I hated Eclipse back then, and I fucking hate VS now

"Customer's customer needs important thing ASAP!!!!"

"Ok wut"

"X, Y, Z!"

"Sounds good, we can do that, for what customer's customer!?!?"

"uhhhhhhh"

The volume of really important shit that we don't have details on is too damn high...

Things to do while you encounter a bug and haven't resolved in some hours:
- Leave it and get clean air so your brain relaxes.

What i do:
- Stay there trying to figure out why the fuck this shit doesn't work and considering falling from the window a very good option

v2.0.22 is now officially LIVE in GMT+2. Congrats and good job everybody!

Let's not fuck this one up, shall we? Let's keep our shit together this time.

API Request validation is stupid.

Until you remember
* Your target audience is highschool students
* Your front end dev loves to fuck your stuff up
* His mom works in QA and she equally likes to fuck shit up
* It's just a good idea
* People just fucking suck

I love Flutter. So simple. Such good docs. Not totally shit multiplatform. Flutter is my new favorite framework. Good job Google

SVN.

Nothing good comes with GUI for version control except for the graphs of branches. And this little tortoise thinks it's the shit.

Spent last 2 days thinking of a good App Idea for a Hackathon. About 15 ideas later
Error 404: Shit to do not found!

*Have idea.

*Start thinking about it.

*Start seriously thinking about it.

*Push yourself to do it.

*Have a mini unconscious panic attack that tells you you're gonna fail.

*Do something else completely unrelated to what you wanted to do.

*Feel good about the meaningless shit you just achieved.

*Recognize you're procrastinating.

*Try to stop.

*You can't cause you're stupid and lack the control and discipline to trick your own mind.

*Watch video about how to overcome procrastination.

*Get a more firmer understanding of it.

*Realize you're a helpless piece of shit.

*Cry till dead inside.

*Resume daily mindless shit.

Submiting a form with Ajax without e.preventDefault()

Chrome : Yeah it's all good
Firefox : No. Eat shit. Display a length error in console...
IE : I'll let you pass but I'll crash right after...

I'll never forget again

Ha ha just this happened, One young man is building some shit on Wordpress with bunch of free plugins. And he said i'm a good dev. And he's login page load speed is 47 seconds.

So we were supposed to have another good build today.

Supposed to.

This one guy on our team gets weird sometimes, and refuses to commit his shit until the last minute. He says "Don't worry, I'll handle all the merging, it'll be fine!"

What he forgets is that much of our code relies on his! His latest commits reworked a couple entry points and a class definition. No backwards compatibility.

He made his commit, and nearly our whole stack shit the bed. Jesus jumping Christ. Weekend? Nope.

When all your automated test results come back good... But you just know, deep down, somewhere there's a plate of shit sitting too close to a fan.... waiting!

Hey React, why won't you die?

Seriously, you are cumbersome to use, heavy as shit, awful syntax and do only the most basic reactive operations possible.

Why do you have to re-render un-changed components?

You were good when you came out, but please, get the fuck out of job requirements everywhere.

i wish i could half-ass work, but instead I'm a huge nerd who does a good job and people are giving me more shit to do now

(I guess the Question category is the best for this)

Do you believe that someone can be a good dev even if they write shit code?

I personally do, if that person acknowledges the fact that their code is shit, wants to improve it, is humble, is always in the search for constructive, etc as in to make their code better and more readable, I'd think they are a pretty good dev.

Half my Instagram likes are just me scrolling down and randomly stopping so it accidentally counts as a like.

Good luck trying to find what I've liked tho! Instagram protects that shit more than the nuclear codes.

Who the fuck developed this shit?

Helping grandma with her computer, feeling good about myself, proud of her for learning to use a computer atage 84 !

Oh wait. You use internet explorer? You hate chrome? How can you hate chrome you know nothing about comput.....

Ah shit. Sorry grandma.. just.. use chrome

Raining outside, the office all to myself. The entire building is empty and here I am jamming to Volbeat while I finish some stuff for monday.

It sounds as If i am complaining, but I am not, i love this me time that I get at the end of every Friday (we leave at 12 but I stay about 3 hours extra to fuck around)

I love this shit. Boss got us pizza yesterday and there is still some left.

And i got some tobacco with me . This is some good shit my dudes. Good shit

"A good designer finds an elegant way to put everything you need on a page. A great designer convinces you half that shit is unnecessary." - Mike Monteiro

Imma be real with youse, i havent been posting shit cause i have a great job with great teammates and great management. Like it a rant that i cant rant but thats a good thig i guess. But ion wanna see devrant community goin down the gutter cause old members r leavin so imma stick around and post stupid shit in the comments as usual. So youse can stop bothering me bout bein inactive hmmm

If I had to audit my current code I'd definitly stick a cactus up my arse shouting in the mirror:

ALL YOUR CODE IS GOOD FOR IS ULTIMATE DELETION. YOU FILTHY MAGGOT! LEARN TO CODE... *rage quit*

Really, coding shit because of spare time simply makes me ripping my face of 💀

JIRA.

Plenty of good things happened at work this year. Then we started using jira. That "heavy" bucketfull of shit though.

Snapchat is a piece of shit app. My phone (Moto G5 Plus) is far from spectacular, but ive never used an app that freezes and crashes more than that piece of shit app.

If they'd take Apple's dick out their mouth for a week and work on making the app less shitty for Android, that'd be fucking awesome. Or ya know...stop making some good awful update that looks like shit and fix the fucking app first.

* TALKS to someone from Portland about a potential Amtrak trip to Portland.
*opens youtube after an hour or so*
Top suggestion -> TOP 25 things to do in PORTLAND

Good old days where we use to laugh off such "coincidences" as Paranoia! Now this shit scares me for real

STOP FORCING ME TO REIR ART YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
I've officially decided to make the change to linux. Can anyone recommend me a good distribution? Is there anything like homestead with all necessary tools already installed? Any help to get me started on using Linux as a daily driver is welcome, thanks 👌

*Clears throat*

To everyone who say's they won't release X for Y because Y isn't good at Z (For example, people who don't support games on Linux because Linux isn't as good at gaming compared to windows), go fuck yourself with the wide end of a rake...

Fuck me people piss me off with stupidity sometimes .-.

Thing's aren't going to evolve and get better if everyone just abandon's shit at the first fucking hurdle, remember when windows wasn't good at gaming compared to mac, well that fucking changed pretty quick didn't it...

(If anyone is curious how this came about, I'm am still holding hope for Gamemaker studio 2 to come to Linux but in the mean time though about running it's compiler through mono and building a front end to see if I can even do it but was talking to someone about it and they said I'm wasting my time because Linux is shit for games)

I just installed voidlinux and daaaamn this shit is good. Its so lightweight and fast :3
And I don't even need the AUR to install i3-gaps. Its in the fucking main repo.

Now I'll just shut the fuck up and continue experimenting

Why are most developers/software engineers so absolutely fucking shit at their craft?

I understand incompetence exists in every occupation but it seems in development the ratio of bad developers to good developers is like 9:1. There’s a serious lack of quality in this industry and it’s only further exacerbated by coding bootcamps and orgs like general assembly pumping out more dog shit

I'm digging around in Microsoft's CI/CD for VSCode and hilarity ensued

Sick and tired of this country. Is it a fucking crime to try to be a good dev in here? I mean, nobody gives a shit about quality and the learning process, it's all about the money, 'making it work', and salaries. Don't the guys have any honor?

*turns on the TV*
*pop-up blows up in my face: "you have a new message"*
Me: ??
*confusingly presses "View"*
Msg: *Do you know why *some random shit show of a movie* is the most viewed? You can rent it in our video store*

YOU MOTHER FUCKING BRAINLESS ASSHOLES!!! I'M PAYING FOR THAT FUCKING SUBSCRIPTION! MY FUCKING MONEY!! MINE! WHICH I CHOSE TO GIVE TO YOU FOR A VERY SPECIFIC SERVICE!! DO NOT PUSH YOUR BRAINDEAD, GREEDY BULLSHIT ON ME!!! IF I'LL WANT TO WATCH A GOOD MOVIE I'LL FIND IT MY SELF! YOU ARE TO FUCKING RETARDED TO TELL WHAT A GOOD MOVIE IS!!!
GOD DAMN ADS PUSHING SHIT HEADED PEASANTS!!

Macbook keyboard is shit
Especially european variant.

I want to see any person in the world that is braindead enough to think that making short left shift if favour of having abolutely useless button there is good.
This is the most stupid decision that could be ever made.

Not only the symbols used by that button are seldom used, they also are duplicated on they other keyboard keys. But shift is used all the time and must be big enough instead of that shit.

!rant
things are looking up for me fam. signed an offer letter about a month ago for a GREAT full time job at a company that's in the process of modernizing their web app, so I get to do modern web dev, and I just scored my first consulting job that's gonna pay me a STUPID amount of money and I don't even graduate college till May!

You know what really grinds my gears?

Executive bathrooms. They get gold and marble and all kinds of fancy shit and the rest of us get a linoleum shit box. Who do they think they are? Are they too good to shit and piss with their developers. You know...the people who make the shit that makes them money?

Executives are just overpaid suits who do next to nothing while the rest of us carry their fat asses across the finish line and they are too good to take a shit with us common folk.

Hate asking these questions here buuuuuut...

Can anyone recommend a good flowchat/diagram visualiser for linux?

Preferably GTK based so it doesn't look out of place but anything will do, using google docs for this shit is like trying to disarm a bomb with a spoon...

I think at Apple they only hire software engineers that only worked with Apple computers before and therefore have no idea what good software is, turning their product with each hiring round into an ever larger layered vicious circle of shit better known as macOS.

Found a relatively good blog post regarding building interpreters and holy shit it feels weird to understand things but amazing to realise it's some of the cleanest code I've ever written...

Legit my only answer to fixing shit code for a nursing app at work is.....

Writing more shit code. Man the dude that developed this before had 0 clue what he was doing.....and because shit grew out of control there is shitcode everywhere.

I like writing shit code though. It is good practice.

Writing shit code without knowing is one thing. You really do reach expert level when you write shit code WHILE being fully aware of it.

Same as the year before.
Trying hard to achieve good grades in school. Nothing special. The usual shit, as you can see...
Thanks for taking your time and read my unnecessary post anyways ;)

DevRant is making shit jokes at 3AM in comments with tech strangers online

Have a good weekend 💃🕺

Websphere...what a piece of shit! IBM, you really should be embarrassed. Dependency injections stops working when the injected bean is in another jar (even though it's on the class path). Works great in JBoss.

Seriously IBM...go out of business already. You are a joke and your products have never been good.

The only 4 mobile games on all app stores: "shit for other consoles or PC or Flash ported badly to mobile for $5", "idle clicker don't-play-to-succeed game fuck you pay me to succeed faster", "complete XYZ random quick thing 300 billion times", and "free-to-make shit like chess or crosswords or w/e but bad so we make money on empty promises"

i just want something good to play when bored in the car or some shit without needing multiple devices

Why in the everliving freaking fuck does Java have a class called URLEncoder which DOES NOT DO URL ENCODING??? The shit-spraying piece of a mouldy footgun does formencoding?? Which sadistic maniac thought that was a good idea?

Writing a good email explaining things/ shit is an art. Very few master it.

Niceeee.
Been receiving packages every day but today I good good shit..
Ideias for me to try?
4 relay module, 4 mostef board, finally the gears for the motors I'm scraping, and more mostefs. My mom is saying that I have the mailman for myself lol

First day of my first developer job is Monday. Oh shit. Nerves are starting to set in. What if I’m not good enough for the job? I mean I didn’t the coding assessment they wanted me to do. And passed. Which is why they gave me the job. But fuck man I’m nervous! I have never had a job like this before. And it’s remote after my first week. Oh shit.

"A good designer finds an elegant way to put everything you need on a page. A great designer convinces you half that shit is unnecessary." - Mike Monteiro

Holy shit. Just logged back in the devRant WebApp after a couple of moths and woah. What a nice design over there. Good job devRant team.

I sit on toilet to take a shit and i started falling asleep! I shit even while i sleep! This is magnificent. Miraculous. Every day its the same shit but more advanced style of shitting. I am becoming very skilled at shitting. I deserve to get fucking paid every time i take a shit. There should be a sport about who can shit more often every day and I'd be the winner. Bullshit floats all around us every day especially from jobs and interviews. It is inevitable to avoid it. Beautiful. And it does make sense. I keep saying life is shit anyways every time some shit happens. And im always right -- life IS shit anyways. The keyword is **anyways**. Because no matter what you do or dont do, life will be shit Anyways. Life is empty and meaningless. Even shit has more meaning than life itself. If meaning is something that is made up then you can't live life at all. If meaning is what you make it then there is no default meaning in the entire existence. All of it is shit. We either exist because God made us and doesnt want to tell us why or we exist by chance of statistical randomness. Hopefully its the first option as its less depressing

Btw terraform is fucking good

I hate iOS. Everything works perfectly on windows / OS X on any browser, but then you have retarded iOS not understanding anything of the (simple) ES5 JavaScript I throw at it, and good luck debugging that when your Mac isn't with you.

Getting tired of Apple's shit

You might get your degrees and other shit but you'll never be good at any of this if you're not passionate

Its better to be at a good position in a shit company, than be at a shit position in a good company...

i dont give a fuck why would you take a perfectly good domain name and shit out a fucking 80s useless website THAT DOES NOT EVEN DO ANYTHING

FUCK U

!Rant

I fucking hate my laziness, I really want to make something but I can't have a proper idea, I want to build a portfolio but I'm just stuck with basic knowledge of java that every keeps praising me because of it since their level is shit, like so fucking shit, I hate my classmates this uni the spirit they have, its just depressing on so many levels ! Fucking shit! Why can't I find any motivated people that want to improve generally and just get a good mark to pass the freaking tests!

Student bars are some good shit

!rant

For a bunch of application redesigns that we are doing at work I am letting the other two developers in my department help with selecting the stack. Normally, we work with Java and PHP, and while they seem to enjoy php I find them concerned at the possibility of making it more Java centric.

So I compiled a list of examples of different tech stacks that are not only more modern (cuz our Java stuff is old JSP stuff) but also simple to learn and use. Mind you, the point is to make this a gradual change, not just rewrite the entire house from scratch.

the list contained examples in:
Python: django and flask

Ruby: Ruby on Rails

Java: Spring Boot

Golang: Small self made mvc framework I built, nothing fancy on it, it uses templates and shit, didn't make it api centric

Node: Express examples in both vanilla JS and TypeScript

php with Laravel.

Since we work with php most of the time as well I imagined that they would be more inclined for Laravel, but I was wrong :P they seemed to like the Node Express route and the Golang route more than anything else with Python and Django being close.

Personally I know that there is more to selecting a stack, but initial perceptions make for a lot of things in selection of the stack.

Pretty excited, if they gauge everything considered in regards to what we have and we found Golang to be a clear winner it would give them the chance to add a nice and competitive tech to their resumes.

not a rant, or anything per se, just wanted to share some stuff with y'all

Me: trying to do any simple fucking project
Me: cant figure out how to do something simple or cant figure out how to start or how something should work.
Me *Looks up problem* (everytime...)
results: SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT OF.

Am I just a shitty programmer, a shitty learner, or just not cut out for this? because I fucking Love this field. this is the only thing I ever want to do. BUT I CANT FIGURE ANYTHING OUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME EVEN WITH LANGUAGES IM GOOD AT!! WHICH IS JUST PYTHON AND IM STILL SHIT AT THAT.

I TRY TO DO PROJECTS WITH JS, OR C, OR PYTHON PICK WHICHEVER ONE. AND I NEVER KNOW HOW I SHOULD START IT, AND IF I LOOK UP HOW TO DO IT ITS SO MUCH LONGER AND COOLER AND BETTER THAN MY DUMBASS WOULD HAVE DONE (and longer in a good way because its well thought out and works)

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET A REAL JOB IN THE FIELD IF I CANT MAKE THE RANDOM IDEAS THAT I SEE ON THE INTERNET AND WHY CANT I MAKE THEM AS GREAT OR LONG AND SHIT ON MY OWN. SO MANY PEOPLE CAN WRITE SO MANY LINES OF CODE AND FUNCTIONS AND ALL THIS SHIT THAT WORKS AND YEAH THEY LOOK UP SOME PROBLEMS BUT NOT HOW TO FUCKING DO THE ENTIRE THING LIKE SOME FUCKING RETARD
AWDJKBAKWJBDAOLK;JWDBOALBJKWODANLWIO;NIAWDN;PIAWLDJBAWIDHB
I CANT GO A PROJECT WITHOUT LOOKING UP HOW TO DO ANYTHING BECAUSE MY LITTLE BRAIN CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO IT

Ubuntu 16 lts wifi drivers have problem and i am unable to fix this shit, everytime there's a new problem with ubuntu I hate ubuntu now for these many problems I'm not going to use it again.
If I didn't find any good linux distro I think I should switch to mac

always put timeouts on your connection code..number of times I see shit blocked forever ..and we know it’s not good to have your shit blocked

Ever since i learned terraform i cannot go back. I cant fucking use the ui anymore. This shit is too good. 1 command to create all bullshit and 1 command to destroy all bullshit. Fantastic. Misconfigured shit? Just fix it in a file and 1 command to update it. Perfect. Need to add more shit? Add more lines and 1 command to update. Shitastic. Instead of misconfiguring bullshit or forgetting to delete some shit manually i can simply just do it all 1 command no errors

HOWEVER i noticed sometimes even terraform gets fucked up with bullshit. When im destroying my infra it infinitely says destroying. As if its stuck in that loop. No idea why. So i have to manually destroy the bullshit and then run destroy a fww more times till it works

A see a lot of ppl talking about shit junior devs do, this is good lets me know wat not to do

Fucking hell the AWS IAM documentation is confusing as fuck. Trying to set up a fucking role is harder than cutting a rock with a fucking spoon.

And who the fuck thought it would be a good idea to allow a CLI user to run any command he's allowed to without any form of authentication??
Oh, set up MFA for the CLI you say? Good fucking luck with that, if you ever manage to figure out how to set that shit up!
Fuck this shit!

OMFG this SAP hybris backoffice is such a disfunctional piece of shit. The simplest modification is like going through dozends of places, changing weird named XML stuff. I consider myself good at seeing the whole picture of an API ... but this ... this isn't something I would even call API ... IT'S shit, pure and utter shit.
Sockets, widgets XML, config XML, widget-configurations, definition.xml widgetcontroller .... not even the docs are clear (or existing for that matter) ... ARG !"§$%&/(O

I swear the implementation of byte arrays in dot net is fucking brilliant, never thought I would give good credit to dot net but the amount of bloody times this shit has saved me is unbelievable...

Im fucking tired that every cool add on for a browser asks permission to read everything... Like what the actual fuckkk ppl!!

Its not social media and that shit, but banking info. ..

If anyone knows a good tutorial to hack your own stylish extensión it would be appreciated

REST apis. More than you think it is.

Just because you can access a resource by a uri, doesn't mean you have a good api.

Hypermedia that shit and let websites reuse your links from api responses, then we are getting somewhere.

Also, Fucking api versioning.. Learned the hard way that /v1/ doesn't mean Shit in most cases

RethinkDB is such a rediculous overengineered BIGGEST BULLSHIT I HAVE EVER UNFORTUNATELY USED.

Does anyone even use this total shit????

This shit eats RAM memory for just 1 CRUD operation as if you opened 10,000 google chrome tabs. Who the fuck thought that kind of technology is a good idea?

Yes it IS very fast, a real time database. But you'd have to have a multi-million dollar supercomputer to be able to handle so much data like a relational database can....

Is it just me or is every app out there just a giant piece of shit riddled with bugs now? Did every company fire all their good devs and testers? It’s all fucking trash

With all the stupid fucking animated shit on websites: videos that popup, advertisements that flash (really?), things that popup if you move your mouse, headers that move weirdly relative to your scrolling, and more... Its like the 90s all over again with animated gifs, popups and other garbage. Is there some stupid web designer course saying animating shit is a good idea? The videos that move around are the worst. They totally fuck with my peripheral vision and make me want to rage quit the site.

Have my final exam tomorrow.
Main topic is expert systems (XPS).

I don't know jack shit, but I don't care at this point.
Good night.

Goddamn... Microsoft has a problem with their Bots and their behavior. Bing AI is absolutely unhinged and do y'all remember when Tay lost her shit?

I think Microsoft needs to just bury their dreams of making good AI... They're not good at it. 😂

Can someone explain me what Left liberal woke shit is?

Isn't being liberal a good thing?

I am confused and my political opinion and knowledge sucks.

!rant

So I started learning Golang.
I have to say, I heard the language was good but holy shit!

I got my eye on you implicit interface implementation👀👀

I can't wait to start my first project with a clusterfuck of compositions 🤤

P.s: syntax is kinda weird ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The good: dotnet core RTM
The bad: my previous shitty work place, their shitty product, the very shitty TL that had no fucking idea how to lead or manage the team
The ugly: the shit storm I dropped on TL, group leader, CEO/CTO when I left...

They must be losing good developers at Google, because all of their shit is slowing devolving into hot garbage. Bug ridden pieces of shit. I wouldn’t even pay to use anything of theirs anymore - you are probably better off somewhere else…

I hate PHP. Because of its bad reputation... In fact, i kinda avoid learning it.
Anyway, I Got a good offer.. but their stack is mostly done in laravel...
Shit.. what should I do?

how do you tell a junior dev on your team there code is shit and please don't push to the main codebase without approval first,
without crushing them and and sounding like an ass cause there a good person just a n00b developer

Had a university project with friends, got another guy (#1) in our team. Upon being asked if we would take yet another guy (#2), we were sceptical if he was a good developer... Turned out guy #2 is one of the best of us, guy #1 can't do shit.

Started the day having a career crisis where I feel worthless and all I have been doing is some worthless web shit that humanity never needed and most certainly, never will.

Good day!

The shit code I wrote before my cs degree is marginally better than the shit code I write now. The lack of of improvement is related to the shit job I got after my degree. Cs degree did teach me a lot of good oo concepts and design.... That I rarely use due to shit legacy code I maintain.

How was your day?

Mine wasn't bad. Seems like the project I am working on gets on track, I mean my team (squad) is able to do good things, I really like all the people I have on board. We all are in the same miserable but sometimes funny world.

Shit happens all the time, but at least there are other people we can share the shit with.

And I forgot to do half the metric tonne of stuff I had to do today. I'm not even disappointed anymore.

Well, good morning life. Happy Sunday and all that shit

First time I touch anything related to a graphical interface. My mind went to:
"Shit, it looks so good I bet even my mom could use this!!!!"

With support from my wife, and when she's not there - my good old friend "Holy shit ale".

Once I worked on a custom CMS for a client who was really into breaking stuff... actualy he broke a lot of shit by doing some stuff on he's website while it was live!!!

Once after a hard days of work I had to publish the new version of the site...... first I checked that it is still working on the live server so I could take a backup.... gues what the website was totally fucked up......
I was really angry at that moment and this incident wasn't the first one so I created a user with bunch of swear words as name, surname, email etc etc... and I forgot about it..... so 2 to 3 weeks later the client noticed that user.... and wrote a angry letter to my boss....

Didn't get fired tho :D

oh shitty shit of all shits in the world

I just run out of time on a crossover test of Android Architect because of a stupid call by a stupid old friend.

The test were a bit difficult but I did something really good, and I was on the step 4/5.

GIT, doesn't matter how good your IDE is if your work flow and backup system is shit

When I was 11 or 12, and wrote my first webpage in php, designed with tables. Tables was the shit back then. none of that fancy flex box or bootstrap, and 50% of the internet was flash. T'was a good time to be alive.

It is 10:54 on a Monday and I have not had a Monster because my drug deal- um doctor, told me off for drinking it (not good for anxiety etc). This shit is tough...

The police in England are utterly useless. Some of them are good, some of them try. But generally, they're a bag of shit.

I know this is random, but I can't really say any more than this and I need to rant about this shit. It's frustrating AF.

Finally took a shower after 7 days. Feels so good and fresh. Jesus. I should do this more often probably.

My body was decomposing until now. I literally got 2 pimples on the middle of my fucking belly. Either its a pimple or ingrown hair. Can you believe this shit?

Annoying. But what else to expect from a shit life other than more shit

Finding a good Linux distro, part 3:

I am happy now. KDE Neon running very smoothly and...now you certainly will not believe me, but with least memory. 400MB of RAM after start up. That is stunning! Stock Ubuntu runs about 800-900MB on the same machine, holy shit!

F*cking Windows piece of shit.

I don't use windows, never.

I have it installed like a virus I installed on purpose to do certain things.

One of those things is updating my GPS device.

Well the piece of shit windows decided it was a good idea to restart while I was updating the GPS. Like in the middle of the update. Exactly when it says "Do not unplug your device or turn off your computer"

F*CKING PIECE OF SHIT.

Ended friday on a really good note. Started monday on a complete shit note. Why does team communication have to be so fucking difficult? Oh so you want this like this even though you told me this and now I've spent 3 hours getting drained doing this? Fuck this. Also FUCK SAP, any company who uses that shit should be taxed as if they were established in a ultra communist hell (or utopia depending on your beliefs) until they implement something decent.

What a vast and great eco-system we have (refering to js and npm) almost every time I am trying to use two libs and combine them to work together some shit happens.

So I wanted to have lean and good written code without introducing unnecessary renders and logic.

Ended up doing just that because 'we know about issue with our library, many users told us that, too bad we wont fix that shit', so I feel like a 'workaround' developer at some hackathon right now!

Proofread the shit out of everything in your application, and then get a friend to double-check it. Especially if you've listed "good attention to detail" as one of your attributes. ;)

The ability to communicate clearly and politely can be as important as coding skills.