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Installed Linux on an old windows laptop. This is my conversation 5 minutes ago...
Wife: "Have how you got internet?"
Me: "What do you mean, it has a wireless adapter built in?"
Wife: "But it's not Windows?"
WTF!!!
Me: "Pass my phone, this is going on devRant"
Wife: "Please no, not again"25 -
Conversation with my Boss
B: Are u a hacker?
M: No
B: We need a hacker?
M: Why?
B: Because X department wants to do a hackathon.
11 -
Phone conversation between me and a client:
CLIENT: "I see it weird..."
ME: "Which browser are you using?"
CLIENT: "The one you tech guys don't like"
ME: "Internet Explorer, isn't it?"
CLIENT: "Yeah, I'll switch to Firefox then."7 -
Train conversation between 3 girls:
A: "Oh, I've got 4G.. "
B: "What, we have 4G!?"
C: "OMG I HATE 4G!"
A: "Yeah, it's almost as slow as E"
C: "I know, right?!"
.....
Kill me pls16 -
* phone conversation with Dad*
Dad: What are you doing?
Me: Busy creating website.
Dad: So, if I type " www", will I be able to see it?
Me: *explaining website hosting and servers for 15mins straight*
Dad: Huh. You do learn something in college then.
Me:🤐23 -
Best conversation this week:
A: *reporting a visual bug* The text on this page seems to be placed too far to the right, is this intended?
B: No, it's indented.2 -
Frontend & backend dev conversation
Backend Dev: what will you be working on?
Frontend dev: i will be creating a nice animated loader. You?
Backend Dev: i will be working on optimizing the backend so that no one can see your loader.
🤣🤣🤣🤣7 -
My girlfriend is on phone, now over 3 hours complaining something about her friend, she doesn't suspect she is talking to my Google Assistant. Looks like my Google Assistant is doing pretty good.
"Mm-hmm."13 -
I just overheard a conversation in my uni and I'm horrified.
They want to use Comic Sans as the main font in the app they're going to develop
I hope I just imagined this3 -
Had this conversation the other day:
Girl: So, what do you do?
Me: I'm a Software Developer.
Girl: So you write 1 and 0 all the day?
Me: Yes!
----
I actually work with C#3 -
Client: "This feature doesn't work! I thought you said it was done?!"
Me: "Please press CTRL+F5 and try again..."
Client: "Okay, great, works now."
A conversation I seem to have on a very regular basis.8 -
So what are you studying?
Software Engineering.
Oh, so sit infront of the computer everday?
For the most part, yes, but I also d...
What a waste of time, you and your videogame-internet. Back in my days...
-every conversation with elderly people ever.16 -
Conversation in (not so far) future:
Me: Sorry boss, I can't get to work this morning. My car is updating. Automatically.
Boss: Oh you have that Windows 10 car, you can work from home today.
Me: Boss, but my computer...
Boss: Oh, okay it can wait till tomorrow.3 -
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
SOMEONE WAS HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH ME AND I TOLD THEM I'M A DEVELOPER
THEY ASKED IF I HAD A GIRLFRIEND
HAHAHAHAHAHA
.
.
.
.
of course I do devs are the coolests10 -
A conversation with our network/system admin.
Me : Can I install linux on my computer, windows is slow and terrible.
Him : No, if you use anything but Windows in this company, you will be fired for bypassing our security protocols. Its written in your contract.
Me : *boots up my Macbook*
10 -
So I had a job interview and got offered the job on the spot, then I went back to my manager at my current workplace to raise an issue about me being underpaid for this months wages and this is how the conversation went.
Enjoy.
20 -
Apparently this guy's pull request claims that his code is "very fast" (Official Linux github repository). I can't stop laughing looking at the file changes xD
File changes: https://github.com/torvalds/linux/...
Conversation: https://github.com/torvalds/linux/...
8 -
A recruiter from Amazon scheduled me a phone conversation with a hiring manager. So I took it in my room, cozy in my PJ's, but the manager decided he wants the video enabled. And that's when I realized what he's seeing right behind me...
41 -
Overheard this phone conversation:
"So I have to use Internet explorer since it is the only one that supports JavaScript.
I had to upgrade Java to use it, and now it has to be internet explorer, not even Chrome or Firefox supports JavaScript."
I honestly wanted to punch her in the face.9 -
My work started working on an adult goods site and every once in a while I hear phrases like "Wait, go back to anal", " Can I take a look at sex toys", etc. We're all pretty professional about it, but I still get caught off guard when I hear those convos haha.2
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This might be a little off topic, but I just wanted to talk about this for a bit.
I know that quite a lot of devs aren't the happiest of people, and I've seen many of you discussing depression around here. It's great to have this platform be open about these issues.
Makes you remember that people aren't all that bad, a small conversation with another person could make your day a bit more bearable.
Also, don't forget to have an honest conversation with yourself sometimes. Cut yourself, and others, a bit of slack.
Don't let the big black dog grow too much. It will still be there, but don't let it engulf you in darkness. 💜
19 -
/*The following dialogue is an excerpt from an actual conversation I had a couple of hours ago*/
Microsoft support:
Please check that you've installed the correct version of JavaScript in the Control panel.
Me: JavaScript isn't standalone software.
MS: Are you sure you downloaded JS from Oracles website then?
Me: *ended the chat*2 -
Real conversation:
dev 1: so what are you working on these days?
dev 2: some wordpress project.
dev1: hahaha. wordpress is shit. are you a real developer?
dev 2: have you ever used wordpress?
dev1: no.
dev2: okay.26 -
Overheard a conversation in class today: This dude was talking about how "Linux was terrible and worthless" because he'd spent a few hours trying to install Ubuntu on his laptop over the weekend and couldn't get it to work. I don't know how to tell him Linux isn't the problem here.10
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The question goes straight to @linuxxx.
How secure is Viber? After an update recently, each conversation one starts says it's end to end encrypted.
How true is that?37 -
Me: "Delete this folder"
Windows: "Oki, done."
Me: "How is it still there, F5. Still there! Hey, you forgot to delete this one file. Fix it."
Windows: "Nope."
Me: "Why?"
Windows: "Requires permissions."
Me: "Eh, it was my file, but here you are, my admin credentials."
Windows: "None shall pass."
Me: "Wtf, this is my computer. Who owns this file?"
Windows: "No one."
Me: "What do you mean? Oh, time for your reboot pills, ms. Wandows."
Windows: "Noooooo... ... ... Welcome."
Me: "Ha, the file is gone. Glorious victory."
Windows: "It's just a flash wound."
Credit for style: https://mobile.twitter.com/cmurator...4 -
After interviewing tens of candidates, finally found that one guy who doesn't start the conversation by mentioning jQuery 😂
Too many people started off with jQuery and didn't even bother to learn more about Javascript itself.
11 -
"Do you like your job? I mean, all those collored lines in that funny font... sitting at the desk with this adorable rubber duck... Do you guys jus".....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Me: "SHUT UP YOU STUPID ASSHOLE!!! I MADE 26 COMMITS DURING THIS FUCKING DAY, THE DAY THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE LAST WORKING DAY OF THIS SHITTY YEAR! I HAVE NOT SLEPT AS I SHOULD AT ALL CAUSE THIS FUCKING MIGRATION OF NEW YEAR'S UPDATE AND NOW... AHH NOW YOU STUPID FYCKING PSYCHO... NOW I HAVE TO CONTROLL MYSELF DURING NEXT DINNER WITH FRIENDS, HAVE NO MUCH ALCOHOL CAUSE DURING SUNDAY, EVEN ITS A FUCKING HOLIDAY AND EVEN IF I AM IN A LOOONNGG HANGOVER, I DO STILL NEED TO COMPLETE THIS FUCKING NEW YEAR MIGRATION YOU ASS PUNK! GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU LITLE USELESS TINY LITLE SHIT!!!"
And this is how I see my new years resolution: the time is priceles doing this questions to me...
Happy new year, fellazz! 💃🎆🎉2 -
I never liked cleaning my room.... usually the conversation goes like this
Dad: clean ur room
Me: meh... I'll do it later
$200 robot vacuum: clean ur room otherwise the crap on the floor will jam me
Me: ok ok... Give me a few mins30 -
User: "it stopped working"
Me: "ok. Could you be more specific?"
User: "it just closed"
Me: "could you give me the stacktrace/error message?"
User: "no."
Me: "why?"
User: "can't find it"
With a long conversation and some frustrating debugging it turned out that, ironically enough, the crash reporter crashed...2 -
Having an english conversation with a russian client.
"What do you want the info to be?"
"I want the name, adress and etc."
"Etc?"
"Yes! I attached you a picture with everything...as you can see..."
<the picture is a huge table in russian>
"But the table is in russian"
"Yes"3 -
Future pickup lines.
...
(Some random conversation)
...
Girl :- So what do you do for a
living ?
Me :- Umm, I am a writer.
Girl :- Oh ! Wow, Awesome. What
do you write ?
Me :- Well, you know.
Code. I write code.6 -
Client: You can develop a e-commerce system for me right?
Me: Yeah sure, whats your budget?
Client: 100$ and I want a really good vps included in the price.
** FManzi left the conversation **
No more work for inexperienced5 -
That moment when my boss and I were having a conversation (2 weeks into my new job) and she tells me her daughters name is "Amber" and I jump up with, "oh snap!! That's my dogs name too!!" 😑4
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Actual conversation:
- Vim has weird commands. For instance, you copy by typing "Y".
- Why?
- Correct.3 -
Annoyingly typical office conversation:
Person 1: "Good morning."
Person 2: "Good morning, how are you?"
Person 1: "Good. How are you?"
Person 2: "Good."
Person 1: "Good."
NO! Not good, fuckers. I hear this all day long, come up with something real or original. Talk about the massive shit you just took, or how hard you're taking the news about Diablo Immortal. It reminds me of that scene in Office Space with the repetitive call center lady, lol.17 -
"So what do you do?"
"I am a software engineer"
3 most frequent conversation routes
1. "I have some great app ideas maybe you could help me..."
2. "My computer/phone crashes frequently, what is wrong with it?..."
3. "so how many software/games/mobile apps have you developed?..."5 -
!rant
Thinking about quitting my job and opening a bar named "foo" where the walls have a tapestry of random foo-bar code examples. (Easy conversation starter for programmers)8 -
From r/linuxmasterrace (u/KeithKatar)
How many times has this conversation happened at your workplace?
11 -
Coding changed the way I think, made me more confident about my decisions, and ruined my conversation topics.2
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Conversation with my older sister
Me: "open CMD and enter command"
Big sis: *enters command*
Me: "Look for Ethernet Adapter"
Her: "What?? I can't see it"
*pause 'cause I'm confused*
Her: "Wait, was I supposed to press enter?"
Me: ...
1 -
I gave lift to an old man. Starting the conversation
He: what do you do?
Me: I am a software engineer
He: Nice....... where do you get the material to build a software?
Me: mmmmm google or stackoverflow
He: maybe they are new in market, never heard of them5 -
Overheard this conversation today:
1: look at this! My shiny new iPhone can measure stuff!
2: how accurate is it?
1: not very, it is pretty buggy.
2: how did the bugs get in there?
3: it is an apple so5 -
Update on my rant from yesterday where I mailed my hosting admin that I got blocked.
I am not offended
Check out the whole conversation. Its by far the best converstation over mail.
18 -
A conversation with my friend:
Me: Sure, I’ll whitelist you. What’s your IP?
Friend: I think it’s localhost.
Me: ...5 -
Client: Could you build me a clone of this app? *Link to an app that probably took a full team of developers a year to build*
Me: What's your budget look like for this?
Client: About 500 bucks.
Pretty much a daily conversation.3 -
GDPR conversation in public transport
“GDPR is so boring, basically it means delete all your clients and go home”
- unknown
Can I write this?2 -
devRant is the only social media I like and use regularly.
It certainly has it faults, as any network of people will, but overall I think it provides a much needed conversation between like-minded people.3 -
An old conversation with a former Team Lead (TL)
TL: The client has requested for a feature. Can you provide an effort estimation.
(gives estimation with task breakdown)
TL: 2 weeks? They wants it in 3 days!
Me:
-
— I heard you like programming and are quite good at it.
— Don't know about the latter but I do like it.
— Cool. Can you help me set up this Excel spreadsheet?
Actual conversation I had about two months ago...3 -
This is a conversation my friend and I had.
Me: let me just delete this file
*rm -rf filename*
Frnd: what does the rf do?
Me: Don't know man I just do it coz the memes tell me to.6 -
50 years from now, this might be a conversation I have with my son and grandson"
Me: "I remember the time we had a dot matrix printer"
Son: "What's a dot matrix printer?"
Grandson: "What's a printer?"2 -
So I went to a Linux meetup group and there was this dude wearing an Arch Linux shirt and I went straight up to him and mocked him a bit. Had a nice conversation about i3 configs and other nerdy stuff. We stayed in touch via twitter :)4
-
"I have this great idea for an app, it'll be like Facebook but better"
How I imagine the conversation went before devrant was made3 -
*Conversation about the loan*
HR: what do you expect?
Me: Dunno, I've heard you pay any student about 15€/h, so that's my expectation
HR: Jeah, correct, but do you think you're worth that?
Excuse me what the fuck?8 -
Its never a good idea to let 2 bots have a conversation on Discord...
i think they have some kind of relationship crisis idk.
3 -
Why is it that every time I tell someone I love programming the immediate question that follows is: "So you can hack?". And when I tell them that I can't, the conversation is over.1
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When these "LinkedIn recruiters" call me and start the conversation by saying: "We are a growing company and we can't offer you what you are asking for"
Like what!! Really? You called me at the first place!5 -
Typical conversation between my parents and me
Parents: Can you make stuff?
Me: Make what?
Parents: The thing you do all the time.
Me: "Computer stuff"?
Parents. Yah...
Me: Well, yes, why?
Parents: What can you do?
Me: Well, I know C# the most...
Parents: Can you then make software like Facebook, Twitter, etc?
Me: Well, I can, but that will take a lot of time.
Parents: You should really make something and make money.
Me: Ok. (goes into my room, and turns on laptop)
(a few monents later....)
--[[CHORUS START]]--
Parents: U DOIN COMPUTER???
Me: Uh-huh.
Parents: When did I said to do "Computer stuff"?
Me: Well, you said to rest.
Parents: But I never said to do your "Computer stuff"!
Me: But you said to rest. For an hour!
Parents: WHY U SHOUT AT ME!!!! TURN OFF THAT **** NOW!
Me: Ok.... (turns off and opens C# book immediately)
Parents: What's that?
Me: C# book
Parents: What's C#?
Me: Programming language.
Parents: Where can you use it?
Me: Make stuff.
Parents: Like what?
Me: (lists my personal projects)
Parents: Show me.
Me: (turns on the computer and shows one of it)
Parents: Good. (leaves)
--[[CHORUS END]]--
Me: (deep breath) Can I FINALLY use the computer?
--[[CHOURS]]--9 -
Just found out that our no-reply mail is having a conversation with another autoreply! Turns out that it's autoreply that's supposed to tell people to stop writing is autoreplying to a customers autoreply. Haha...6
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Conversation with co-worker
Me: *Asks question 1*
Me: *Asks question 2*
Co-worker: *Answers only to question 2*
This happens way too often... Like, bruh... 😑7 -
Everytime a non tech friend start a conversation like "hello my lovely companian, I think I forgot my Instagram password.."
Always ends up with "..so can you hack it for me"
-_-7 -
The Internet has gotten weird to a point that the girl I wanna go out with said yes after me sending this picture as a conversation starter.
Image relevant
16 -
We were having a conversation with a bunch of friends and somehow i came up with this
Ps, the data is valid
12 -
Note to myself:
Went alone to a conference, without knowing someone and
have problems to start a conversation with complete stranger,
is a stupid idea.
Social anxiety HURRAY but at least the talks were nice.4 -
I hate recruitment agencies. Had a conversation, i said no thanks. They phone back they next day and tell me i need to let them know if i want to go forward with the job then get angry with me as i tell them no again. WTF?!?!!5
-
Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 1)
ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts
4 -
Me - "I need to find the children"
CTO- "Okay. How many?"
It takes about 10 minutes to realize the conversation you just had1 -
Just run “npm install”.
Mother fucker, if that worked, or if the six hours I spent trying to unfuck your dependencies worked, we would not be having this conversation.9 -
Overheard a conversation between programmers:
.... Your dirty hack finally caught up with you!
.. it is responsible for bug A, B , .. E ... F..
That "temp" code was not touched in years.3 -
I hate Skype for Business with a passion. It's the most garbage useless chat program imaginable. It can barely send basic text chats without throwing an error, and it can almost never send an image without the upload failing. The fact that it can't even save conversation history for each of your chats within Skype is ridiculous -- it fucking saves the conversation as an email draft in Outlook. Come on Microsoft, why do I have to open a completely separate program to view conversation history?! Skype conversation history should be saved IN SKYPE! Fucking AIM was able to save conversation history. I've tried multiple times to get the company to move to Slack or Teams, and for some reason they think that Skype is a good program and they ignore the fact that it's completely useless. It's 2019, why are we using a program that's built like it's 2009? I swear they haven't updated Skype at all in the last decade20
-
People are incredibly rude and ill mannered.
New company stories.
Whenever I am in office and having a conversation with a person, someone randomly appears (like those annoying pop-ups on websites) and interrupts the conversation and starts with their own.
I don't understand why people don't wait for the conversation to be over, or ask for permission (in case it is urgent).
Such behaviour derails the entire thought process and breaks the rhythm.
It's just beyond me. How difficult it can be!!!17 -
- Honey, your code reminds me of the delicious dinner you cooked us last night!
- Oh you mean the meatballs and Spag-.. Wait a minute... -
When you turn up to work and realise you forgot your headphones so you gotta try and concentrate while overhearing every conversation in the office.4
-
So you know how a polite request may be phrased as a question, eg. "May I have seconds?". And how an appropriate answer for such a question may be a simple request, indicating the answerer's desire for the inquirer to be at ease, eg. "please do."?
So today my non-native ass had the following exchange:
her: "I'd love to keep you company but I have to call a friend who asked me dearly to call him back when I get home."
me: "please leave"5 -
I work mainly with Java AND JavaScript (separately).
I hate it when people think I mistake them in a conversation.
Makes me think they are treating me like a fool or a noob.
I really hate it.13 -
Client: I don't know programming. But I think you should make the button more fancy?
Me: ... I am not Harry Potter, don't imagine programming like magic. And you ain't even a programmer...
Daily conversation with our precious client2 -
So you are having a conversation about relationships, breakup etc with your friend on WhatsApp.
Then you instantly see a tinder ad on the first YouTube video you play.
Coincidence or something else ? 🤔
(Every one has some similar experiences i, I bet)10 -
Being a programmer for a while now it always irritates me to try to explain what I'm working on to friends and family. I forget what I knew before I developed. I'm always like "I made the strings in the database- oh I mean the words...well they're actually more like strings of letters- well anyway I made a code to sanitize the user input- I mean make it so it is secure before uhhh saving." I spend so much time watering what I'm saying down I forget what I'm talking about
It's not even funny. It'd be funny if one single person in my family or friend group understood what I meant to some degree.3 -
"Can you hear me?" – This is how my Skype conversation starts, interrupts and ends with long distance Client.2
-
Reported an important security vulnerability inside our organization, right before getting off work. A security team member contacts me over chat asking for some details on my investigation. At the end, he tells me: "thanks, I will copy and paste this conversation on the ticket so that everyone can see".
What I imagined: he would copy and paste the conversation as is, so that every line written by me is prefixed with my name.
What he does: he writes a summary of our conversation, barely mentioning my name, making it look like that part of the investigation was done by him.
Now I have so much anger inside of me that my internal organs are boiling.6 -
Me in conversation with the CTO a couple of weeks before starting the job:
I don't want to be mainly doing ui stuff
Him: that's cool
Me now: HTML
So, my lunchtime is spent applying for jobs...9 -
@lunch conversation today..
Q: "if you were to write this world in a virtual environment, what would be the first thing you would define? "
A:" define Vegas as a closure with no return declared.
Whatever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. " -
I literally just had a conversation with my coworker who is not a dev where he said that WordPress sites getting hacked is a myth. He also thinks shared hosting sites getting hacked is also a myth......I literally can't right now.4
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Boss: “We’re going to have you attend a meeting with the Senior Vice President. You may be asked to present information. Just know that he doesn’t suffer fools gladly.”
Me: “Ok.”
Me over a decade later remembering this conversation: “Heyyy, wait just a damn minute!!!”3 -
conversation between me and coworker via slack:
me: why ffs does this class extend this class. Calling it as a static?
me: it's called as a static exclusively throughout the entire project. shouldn't it be moved to a core singleton class?
me: yup, moving it to core
me: thanks for being my rubber duck
-
The person who I was closest to in the workplace is leaving and everyone else is a "professional employee" and they make "work safe jokes" that deserves "polite laughter" now everyone looses their shit if I let out the f word. I guess I will have my next free conversation with the goldfish.8
-
Just taught a neural network to have a polite conversation. It might as well be a goldfish flopping on a keyboard, but hey, it's something...1
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Conspiracy theory: An Arch user got laid with a vegan and had a child.. the name of which became Nix.
I get it, you use NixOS, great. But what impresses me the most is that its users somehow find a way to sneak it into literally *any* conversation...12 -
Client called with a query regarding her email client. Said to me during the conversation, "I've got yozzamite". Took me a few moments to realise that she meant Yosemite.8
-
So I had this conversation with my dad
Background : He saw news about some celebrity's Twitter account got hacked.
Dad : Do you know how to hack a Twitter account?
Me : No dad. There are ways for people who do this kind of stuff.
D : But, you studied software engineering!
M : Yeah, but I don't do hacking.
D : Although hacking is not ethical but everyone should know about their field.
*Awkwardly left the room*
Just because I studied computer science doesn't mean that I SHOULD know hacking.
And this is not the first conversation of this kind!4 -
I met a guy who reminds you every 5 minutes in a conversation, that his YouTube channel has 500k+ subscribers. Talking to him is like pulling out your own teeth.13
-
In job description :
.....
- You should have a good communication skills .
....
At the company:
JUST FOCUS ON WRITING CODE , No useless conversation3 -
I don’t know if I have dyslexic hearing but I’m pretty sure I do.
I’m in school and overhearing a conversation about indenting lines for something. The software I heard was “Microword Soft.”
I’m slowly going crazy...5 -
Friend: Is this Nvidia GTX 440 a good graphics card?
Me: idk
Friend: if i get it how do i put it in my computer
Me: idk
Friend: but you are a programmer
Me: exactly, i am not an engineer9 -
Have you ever tried chatterbot library (python)?
Last day I tried to train a bot with a list conversation but no matter how long the list was , the bot was really stupid!
Do you have any idea how I can make it a bit smarter?
12 -
Interesting. A few hours ago I had a nice domestic conversation with my coleague about robot vacuum cleaners. He was talking about iRobot Roomba and I was talking about Xiaomi. Here's the result!
Interesting thing is that we talked in a *voice* conversation. Over Slack. Over Chrome. Over corporate VPN (openconnect).
Where's the spying link? Slack or Chrome?
My bet's on Chrome.
What does that tell you about the privacy of your sensitive conversations? :)
Hide behind VPNs all you like. If you have proprietary software (or hardware in the case of Huawei) - you're being watched and listened to.
EDIT: I'm on Linux, he's on MacOS
9 -
Overheard a conversation...
Dev: We should focus on getting it working in production, then we can copy it over to dev so we have a working version.
Me: da fuq?4 -
[least fav part of wfh]
Not being able to have a conversation with coworkers.
No whiteboard.
No spaceous modern desk setup.
No distraction free environment.
No free coffee and lunch.
No 1500W sound system.
No 2gbps internet.6 -
Conversation between a developer and admin team to change configuration in higher environment.
Dev: Please change these config parameters.
Admin: What is environment url
Dev: 😑. Gives the url
Admin: How to change?
Dev: 😑. Gives all the details
Admin: I am unable to perform as server is slow.
Dev: Whom will you report the slowness of server as you are the admin?😵
Admin shocked developer rocked -
Hop on a call without taking a shower....
Client requests to turn on video for a face to face conversation......
Happened twice
¯\_(ツ)_/¯9 -
New job is going well overall, but...
Just overheard a conversation with two coworkers and heard them both say “jif”, unironically...6 -
When i sit down and code, its like a conversation with women.
Im not sure whats going on, but it appears to be working.6 -
Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 2)
ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts
12 -
Developer proposing a solution to architect-- Workaround😵
Architect asking a developer to use workaround-- Architect Solution 😎2 -
When your non-programmer boss asks how exactly some code/bug was fixed.
"You sure? I mean, alright... "
It's not like every time something doesn't work right, this will be the fix. We're not going to have a conversation in the future where you help me troubleshoot something by remembering parts of this conversation.1 -
A few days back I talked to a person who is far away from me with an air distance of 7937km and electronic signals moving at almost speed of light crossing countries. That was good decent conversation.
-
Submitted a ticket to the 3rd party IT provider today. Just like they always do they close the ticket instantly saying they did the work when they didn’t do anything.
Except this time they went one step further. They documented that they had a conversation with me and that they convinced me that I didn’t need the work done.
No such conversation occurred. I have not changed my mind nor have been given any reason to. They just want their ticket times to appear as fast as possible and are willing to lie through their teeth to achieve that.
Prepare for a shit storm motherfuckers.2 -
Anyone out there like agile but find that project managers make it horrible. It is kind of like when you are having an interesting conversation then a bore comes around and overtakes the cool conversation.2
-
We've been using a recruiter who works out of the same business park as us. They purport to be "specialists in technology".
Somehow a conversation got started and I ended up explaining how we make use of open source software, where possible.
Their response: "That's the free one, right?".3 -
“Falling in love with code means falling in love with problem solving and being a part of a forever ongoing conversation.”- Kathryn Barrett
-
Recruiters on linkedin...
Recruiter: You'd be a great fit for this senior position! Let's chat!
Me (knowing I'm not senior level): Sure, let's chat!
Recruiter: Wait, you only have 3 years experience. You're not really qualified.
Me: Yup. You should probably look at a profile before starting a conversation.1 -
Crossed the 3k mark.. 😁
Thanks to everyone.
Every rant, comment and conversation has been wonderful.
One of the best decisions I took in last 1 year was to join DevRant...9 -
Developers that prefer to play the asshole card because it is easier than going through the trouble of acting like a normal person and lose a chunk of their time.
I come across this more and more: if I have a conversation with a random stranger at an event, and we touch upon a new thing that neither one of us knows about or whatever, there is this sudden cut off when one stops the conversation and leaves, rather than staying and keep on exploring the subject and risk of saying something stupid.
Am I just in the wrong place talking to the wrong people?
Or is there some developer budget your time manual that I haven't heard about?2 -
I have a coder friend...
Here's a translated conversation. (read original one followed)
She: Watcha doin?
Me: Foolishness.
She: Means what are you making?
Me: A fool.
Original--
She: Kya kar rahe ho?
Me: Chutiyapa
She: Matlab kya bana rahe ho?
Me: Chutiya :/8 -
* Conversation with friends on our Discord server *
[admin]
-Hey guys! Soon there will be a programming competition on our server, we encourage you to participate
[person A (me)]
-Language?
[person B]
-Engine?
[person C]
-The goal of the competition?
[person D]
-Story? -
I'm currently watching the "it was my idea, I should get half the revenue" conversation play out in real time... For someone else.
I had the sense to turn down this "fantastic business opportunity"1 -
We have the funniest and weirdest conversations during lunch, most of them not dev related. Have been thinking about ranting them for a while now because they are just good fun.
The following one brought a bit of a discussion so It convinced me to post it because i would like to hear all of your opinions about this one:
Imagine that one day you come home and there is a (deep) clone of yourself having sex with your wife, what would you do?
We got divided into 3 groups mostly.
Group one would send him away and let him life his own life.
Group two would make use of the fact that there are 2 of them.
Group three would murder him, the explanation Why Was quite interesting, because it was the first instinct of them, it would also have been from the clone, that's why that had to.
Again I would like to hear what you all would do :)
Maybe if this one does okay I will post more stories11 -
So today at work while trying to get a group of people together to play a game of foosball my boss comes up to my friend and starts talking with him.
The conversation then goes on to include the topic of a new hire coming onboard and my boss not wanting to take him into our team because he feels that the new hire isn’t smart enough.
I’m the time span of this argument/conversation I went and helped another coworker, bought a keyboard from a friend and also finished reading a 25 page white paper.
At the end he still doesn’t want to have the new hire on our team.
All I wanted to do was play a game of foosball 😥8 -
Passive aggressive commit notes should be mandatory, such a good stress reliever and conversation starter.4
-
My boss was gossiping about all the staffs except me and the other person who was listening to him. I was coding and not part of the conversation.
What do you guys think, is he fit to be a boss and a leader?5 -
When you got hired
HR: please come to us if there's any problems related work so that we can give a solution.
After years of working you send a mail with you problems, it's been months. Still no reply! And try to avoid conversation regarding that problem.2 -
Conversation in a debug meeting, after a series of confusing failures:
Senior dev: “This is stupid”
Junior dev: “Me too” -
This is long rant/story:
My manager conducts sync-up meetings regularly. The idea is to sync up all developers on current state of work. He does’t conduct stand-ups. He doesn't have time for it. He rather discusses on individual basis if we are blocked. The rule of the sync-up meeting is NOT to discuss any blockers or problems but simply explain each other what we are doing and how we plan next.
Sometime ago, the manager brought up and explained a new way of working in the sync-up meeting. At this point, a new developer in the team was absent due to sickness.
Today, there was a sync-up meeting and the manager started to question the new member about the newly introduced way of working. He was unaware of it and the manager never communicated this important information via email or any mode of communication available.
So, the conversation goes on as follows:
"Manager": — "Why didn’t you complete your task as per the new way of working?"
"Employee": — "Well, I've no idea. Am I supposed to do? I’ve been working as usual like any other"
"Manager": — "We have a new process and you have failed to follow it, so we’re late in delivering your work"
"Employee": — "I’ve already finished my work on time. I've raised a pull-request this morning"
"Manager": — "It doesn’t matter, it is not merged to main branch and so we can’t include your work in the release"
"Employee": — "I’ve no idea about the new process"
"Manager": — "Haven’t you asked around about what happened from previous meeting"
"Employee": — "Yes, I have. I was told which tasks were handled, but nothing about a new process"
"Manager": — "Aren’t you interested to learn it?"
"Employee": — "Why won’t I be interested? I was on a sick leave and I have no clue what happened here"
"Manager": — "What’s happened is past now, let’s not focus on it"
"Employee": — <Dumbfounded>
The Employee felt ashamed in front of everyone. He did his job but it didn’t pay off.
…. After an hour … the Employee had a talk with the Manager
"Employee": — "You shouldn’t have pointed me out in front of everyone. It made me feel real bad. You should have emailed this information if its important for the team."
"Manager": — "I have no idea what you’re talking about. When did I say so? I think you’ve a bright future in the team. You should be focusing on doing better things."
Employee goes back to work. A minute later, the Manager sends a PowerPoint screenshot of the process in the group chat.
**The Process**
It's about delivering release packages based on priorities defined by client. Each release package is a set of work items or requirements. Individual developers are assigned to work items. They are expected to deliver on planned delivery timelines in order to consider a work item into a release package.1 -
Forgot headphones, noticed coworkers conversation...
If null coalescing operator (??) returns right on null, why doesn't !! Do the opposite?
- boolean beat ya to it.1 -
When you juggling between a technical conversation, a private conversation and one with your parents at the same time.
I don't know what to feel anymore4 -
TFW you google an error and all you get are GitHub issues with rambling conversation and no resolution. Marginally better than having no relevant responses IMHO.1
-
Dev calls are so awkward when you're waiting for everyone to join and someone insists on having a conversation
-
Anyone else here that doesn't answer people that only write "hi" to initiate a conversation?
I always feel like they try to put me in charge of leading the convo. You wouldn't call someone and just say Hi, now would you?6 -
I think I speak for everyone when I ask, "How did the conversation go between @trogus and @dfox when they were setting out on creating this app?"9
-
> Learning Front End Development
> mention it in passing conversation
> "Hey I got this idea...."
My reaction everytime.
4 -
So I had a nice conversation with man who develops web for around 30 years , he said he loved angular 2 , but he doesn't get the reason of html5 , I just look at him with a straight face thinking " god , you testing me ?"4
-
business: could you just add this small button? it's nothing right?
my thoughts: why... why do we keep on having this conversation???
1 -
I love Slack because people say all sorts of things and then forget.
So resharing the direct link to a Slack conversation is a passive aggressive way to tell them off.
The second passive aggressive thing is making an animated gif of where that conversation took place.1 -
Just had a very "OMG WTF!" kind of mini conversation with my co-founder, of a web dev startup.
Him: So what's LastPass then?
Me: It's a secure password management system.
Him: So let's use LastPass instead of Dropbox then. :-)
** quickly searches dropbox for passwords **
A little knowledge can be extremely dangerous if left unsupervised.
-
Modifying a depracated wordpress theme with visual composer does not make you a developer. Doing so does not give you the authority to scope development projects. it just sets everyone up for a really awkward, potentially insulting, conversation.
-
Today's conversation in our odc
Person 1: Jenkins Down
Person 2: YouTube or Facebook
Person 1: No... Twitter
Person 2: Gud it means you guys are not blocked...
Awesome troll...
😂 😂 😂 -
Just saying hello. I'm a Google Store chronic downloader and found this. I'm so happy to see so much conversation around coding. I've been learning by myself for 2 months and since then I've been desperate to have someone to talk about programming and stuff. I hope I can learn more and have fun here :)5
-
Best conversation I ever had with a manager.
Pulls me off into a meeting and in the same breath tells me he values my opinion, must not argue with him and he does not want "yes" men. Lol -
!rant
- was having an interesting conversation with my mate
- saw a message from past crush "you still awake?"
- hanged up on bro, saying "i just heard something, will talk later"
- went back to chat with crush
- after 2 replies , she is offline.
Yepp, got played again.
F.5 -
Some of these apps might be using your microphone to extract your conversation and display you related Ads. 😱🙄
12 -
Best conversation with non tech roommate ever:
Me: hey roomie, implement an algorithm to determine if a string has all unique characters
Roommate: like a string of code or a string of yarn?2 -
Today, making a list out loud while in a conversation with a co-worker.
Me:
"thing one" *puts out hand*,
"thing two" *raises thumb*,
"thing three" *raises index finger*,
"thing four" *raises middle finger*
Co-worker: "That's 3 fingers, you said 4 things.."
Me: "I guess I mentally counted in base 0.."3 -
My friend started giving me advice without me even asking. She didn't listen why I chose to do something but kept on saying it's a wrong decision and why I will regret.
I asked to some people in my network and they agreed with me.
During the conversation with my friend, I felt very furious ans once tried to stop her calmly but she didn't listen, in the end I hung up by saying that I'll talk to her later and ended the conversation without getting into shitty conversation.8 -
Thanks for the advice on my previous rant. Had the conversation and I’ll be looking for a new job.2
-
CEO of the startup: We're fully funded. [Shows screenshot of a Whatsapp conversation with an alleged investor.] See?
Me: Riiiiight3 -
Whenever I see anyone mentioning anything about JavaScript (IRL or the interwebs), I desperately want to join the conversation.2
-
When one of the random people working in the call center you have never met, starts the conversation with:
"You look like someone that follows bitcoin"
What ever happened to "hello"2 -
Im kinda hard of hearing, so every time I hear someone talk I subconsciously concentrate on the conversation instead of what I was working on.1
-
Why don’t you like sharing your salary with coworkers? I tell people exactly what I am paid if the conversation comes up. It helps to know where you stand, i.e. if you’re being under paid or if you should ask for more in the next review cycle.6
-
Being the only developer in your circle of non-tech friends is weird 😕.
And why are most female programmers not appealing 🤦♂️.
The beautiful ones are usually clueless and can't get into a ”deep programming concept ”conversation.
I guess I can't eat my cake and have it at a time.19 -
"I'm sorry my dear new client but i was having a deep conversation with my rubber duck, I'll be right there with you"
-
I was talking to some people I know that I was looking for a job. My (now) boss overheard that conversation and just told me that I don't need to look any further.
-
That moment when you consider never attending a certain lecturer's lecture, after he openly tries to shove Apple products down student throats... If only it was a two sided conversation.
-
them recruiters.. they keep grinding my gears to the maximum extent..
why do you message me that you have a position. to fill asking where we can have a chat and never reach back... you initiated the conversation in first place...
I replied within the hour, good god.. -
Linus Torvalds first usenet message about Linux, 1991.
Interesting conversation at a high level... Until 2011, when it was added to a Google group. And there comes the noise: "thks lulz", "Dear Sir Thank u very Sir", "thank you for everythings"...
:/
https://groups.google.com/forum/m/... -
That moment when you start to use propositional logic in a conversation with normal people, but the others don't get what you are talking about.
-
The other day, me and some university colleagues were discussing some app/game ideas to develop, and then here comes the "Stupid of the course", makes his way into the conversation and says this...
"I'm going to program Fifa since it's the same game every year"
-.-'' -
When your gf texts you and you just dwell into long romantic conversation and forget what you were even coding.(I'm serious it happen to me sometimes, not all the times coz we spent most of time arguing 😂😝)
-
"Oh, you committed at a top level? That's alright I'm going to make you revert at file level, all 10 files in 4 directories. Oh and I may just keep one or two with your changes just for old times sake."
- my conversation with SVN -
!rant
Guys, just a question. Let say in a company either your boss, senior or manager who always wants to win a conversation no matter what the issue is and whoever is at fault.
e.g.
Me: Roasters can't lay eggs
Boss: Yes they can
....
(After few minutes you are bore and want to end the conversation)
Me: Yes, yes fucken Roasters can lay eggs. You are right. Now fuck off.
Question Again:
Will you work for someone who wants to win the conversation?2 -
Rough start for a week. The coffee machine nearest to my office went broken and now I have to do serious analyzing when picking up coffee. If I miss my calculations, I'll have to engage in a conversation and coffee + conversation is usually a waste of perfectly good coffee.
All this brain work is reduced from my mental capacity I should be using for actual development work.
Evolution - give me a coffee gland! NOW!2 -
Need an iPhone app to automatically call girlfriend on birthday at 12am and actually carry out a conversation in your voice so you can sleep.5
-
Your tests won't work right because you failed to meet coding standard, not that hard to understand. Yet, here we are still implementing the same shit that got us in this conversation.
-
>be me a tech nerd
>see sexy women
>try to engage in conversation but only make werid gurgling noises
>never live it down3 -
In a conversation about which editor to use to edit pod file, this guy said nano.
I thought what a great idea to piss off both vim and emacs people in a single shot 😂2 -
Listening to a conversation between Juventus, Milan and Inter fans, it's like listening 3 programmers discuss who is the best language between Java, Python, and C#.
Of course, it's JS the best language :P :(1 -
Just found out Quora has launched it’s own chatbot called “Poe”. Currently testing to see how deep it could go in conversation because it seems like we’re approaching the bot war era.
6 -
Just had my performance review conversation with my manager today and basically it's another "great work"
Which is what I get every year. So wondering does anyone actually get constructive criticism or things they should improve upon?4 -
Just as I had been discussing information security here on devRant, Facebook reminded me of an article I posted a year ago.
http://makeuseof.com/tag/...
Makes me wonder if Facebook's iOS app is keylogging me. Not long ago I was having a conversation at work with a coworker on a topic of a product I know for certain I had never, ever searched for online. Just after we ended the conversation, I launched my Twitter app and, lo and behold, there was an ad for that exact product on my feed. -
When you hear a conversation where a developer tries to explain difference between JavaScript spread operator and an ellipsis to a random person they walked past.
20min now... (Ellipsis is intentional here) -
Fucking hell! Why can‘t I block notifications for a specific conversation thread for a limited amount of time in Teams? I get spammed with shit that I don‘t care about but when I block it now, I will forget to unblock it later. 😡4
-
Overheard a conversation from the C-level about firing a certain colleague... again. This is now the 4th time I've overheard they are firing someone before the (ex-)colleagues even knew.4
-
When I accompanied my Dad to buy a laptop. I listened to the conversation between him and the dealer an I was like "will I ever understand anything to do with pc specifications".
-
So, I’m on interview 3 with a company looking to build a cross platform app.
They posed the question of what we should use to build it; React Native or Flutter? Or just go native with Swift and Kotlin individually? What’s your thoughts?
I’m really interested in this conversation.2 -
so... apparently Lync is encrypted, but if your partner doesn't notice your message it's sent as a plain text "Missed conversation with..." email...3
-
just realize, I have not talked face to face with anybody in a whole day
(little conversation on phone and chat)
total of 8 peoples in my office room including me and 30 + in the whole office.
that means either every device working properly in office or it's my luckiest day.4 -
So I call my sig other on the phone. At the start of the conversation I, for fun, make the sound of a goat.
me: ba a a a
other: really?
me: What?
other: horny old goat?
me: FFS, Freudian Farm Sounds...1 -
Strangermeet up conversation
Stranger: m22
Me: just sleep bro ,u can't get girl here.
Stranger : can't sleep R8 now, reading quantum computing book.
Me : interesting
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes we are now friends (#~#) -
Stupid project ideas pitched at me?
Well, basically everything my friends ever mentioned.
NO I don't wanna help you do shady things... and as soon as someone drops the word hacking I route the whole conversation to my inner /dev/null2 -
So I had this conversation yesterday while fixing yet another Windows laptop for someone else.
Other Guy = OG
Me = Me (Duh)
OG: So what are your plans after your apprenticeship?
Me: Uh, I'll probably start somewhere that's e-commerce related, kinda like my current company but somewhere else.
OG: Uh have you thought about being your own boss?
Me: Well yeah, but I wouldn't know how to attract customers and shit
-- This is the moment shit gets real
OG: OH BTW I heard that Germany is lacking AI developers, you should do that! It earns you shitloads of cash!
Me: Uhm.. well, that might be true b-
OG: There's no but dude, it's free money, you're smart.. I mean you can fix any computer, right? AI will be just as easy
Me: It's not like-
OG: Duh, don't make yourself look so bad I know you can do it!
Me: B..But I'm not interested in it at all
*silence for 5 seconds*
OG: Well.. I guess you do you then
After that we continued to have random chit-chat about his job and experience (He's a mechanic)
God I hate when people throw buzzwords around and try to convince other people to do what *they* want.
No, I don't want to develop a structure of 1000 ifs/elses, I'd rather keep doing what I'm doing, thanks!6 -
If there is something I hate, it's when peoples emails end with "Sent from my iPhone".
It literally doesn't add anything of value to the conversation, on the contrary it only shows that the person is either too indifferent or lazy to turn it off, or *shivers* actually thinks it's cool.1 -
Coworker 1 asked if there was a website where he can learn more about Formstack.
Coworker 2 said no.
Coworker 1 asked him then what about formstack itself? Is their website helpful? Do they have a help section?
Coworker 2: "Well there’s not really a websiiiiiite for help, but their main website has a page for help.”
Coworker 1: “can you send me a link?”
Coworker 2: "no. I mean I can, but I mean they don’t really have a help website, but just help on their website.”
Coworker 1: "WTF!"2 -
He basically abhorred me because i still have no idea why he abhorred me but honestly I'm glad he did. We never had to work together, but i once tried sparking a conversation thinking let's see maybe he is not all he shows... The conversation ended in 3 seconds... And he was acting all childish ... Oh well... Cheers everybody!
-
What I would like, do I want to start a conversation?
Sorry...
if let url = URL(string: "devrant://") {
let app = UIApplication.shared
if app.canOpenURL(url) {
//safe, Talk to user
} else {
//don’t start a conversation, or stop it now!
exit(0)
}
} -
Inspired by an overheard conversation (partial) among some of my co-workers:
I'm going to make an app that takes a speech sample, either text, or audio file, and accurately gauges the speakers' ages based on the number of times per minute the word "restaurant" is used.1 -
When you are in a meetup or a conversation with hipster devs and you hear new buzzwords, just use common sense, google it and pretend you've used it...
Just like anybody else. -
Got involved into a conversation/debate.
Said something as argument.
Opponent repeat with a 'yea' and plus what I just said as his argument naturally (amazing) and expect my response.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? -
Walking past a conversation with people and over hearing the term CNN, thinking its about Convolution Neural Networking. Long story short. Im standing here between people discussing news resources. Fml
-
"Per our conversation [Redacted] would like to do a Teams Video call with you to discuss RonR opportunity with us."
What's RonR? I'll interview for a backend software engineer position with an offshore company3 -
I was just thinking that if i need to setup a log server i'd need to name it properly so this was my conversation with myself:
me: i should name the log server something relevant
inner me: call it log_cabin
me: that's not relevat
inner me: CALL IT LOG_CABIN -
!dev
A good conversation must be like a mini skirt. Short enough to cover the subject, long enough to retain the interest.2 -
Imagine the conversation with guests if you would have SSID: NotGonnaTellYou and Passphrase: DefinitelyNotGonnaTellYou#&€+'-€∆¶×✓®©✓~π|×¢✓. Fact: you can't, illegal characters in the passphrase. Duh.
-
I found myself tonight imagining what a conversation between Cheech and Chong about serverless would be.
Maybe the basis for a new talk?
Suggestions please1 -
Weird Thought: Somebody should make donuts in the shape of a debug duck. This way, we can not only have hypothetical technical conversation with the duck, we can also eat them out of frustration of debugging.3
-
Microsoft Office Communicator (2007) is complete junk.
It can't even save a conversation session overnight -
one night I posted " function smoking() * at my office conversation group and everyone stated asking what's that?
And I replied ahh nothing I'm just high, ignore it.
I was dreaming1 -
In client terms, a “3rd party” is akin to Angelina Jolie. Despite the promise that you’ll be able to have an enlightening conversation over a nice meal and hopefully hook up afterwards ... sorry, it ain’t happenin’. You’re just gonna have to fantasize about it while you take care of business yourself.
-
People!
I need help!
I'm in my first job out of college. Been here for more than 10 months now and there hasn't been any talk of promotion or bonus etc.
I don't know how to start this conversation with my manager.
I accidentally came across a Slack chat which said that a person is getting a raise and a bonus so I know that it's not like there is nothing like that but I also now understand that all these things happen on the down low and are not communicated openly or whatever.
I'm not sure what to do here.
One thing that came to my mind was getting a higher job offer (which I know I can) from some other company and show that but rather than that, I'd love to just sit and talk about it with my manager because we're on good terms and I haven't heard or been told that I need to improve or anything.
All this is coming up in my mind because some of my friends in their companies got promotions after 6-8 months of working at their companies. So, it is kind of giving me anxiety now because there has not even been a discussion about this.
Also, I am not close enough to anyone on my team that has been here long enough. So, I can't just bounce this off of them.
HOW DO I START THIS CONVERSATION? ARGH?7 -
I get tired of people complaining about rails "magic" it's annoying. Ok we get it, you have never taken the time to understand it's naming conversation or looked under the hood.
-
People thinking their computer problem justifies them being rude.
I've literally been in the middle of a conversation and someone walks up and hands me their computer and says "can you fix this?". Just because you work 20 feet away from me does not mean I'm your personal IT help.4 -
I finally got a working D&D Dungeon Master AI working right, a lot of actions have to be presented before the full combat round, but the results are all unique, but it still isn't creative enough to add more then 2 npc with conversation skills, I think there's some hidden blocks in the backend :/
7 -
So a coworker is having a conversation about travel:
Ted: I need a microwave in my room so I can cook food.
Coordinator: Okay, we can try and arrange that.
They finish talking about a couple of things. Coordinator is walking out of room.
Me (loudly): Cat's not gonna cook itself!
Ted: <nervous laughing>1 -
What is the point of https://pusher.com/sessions ? It's just like youTube, but with no ability to comment. I think the conversation in the comments is half of the content for developer talks. :/
-
So i'm a laravel dev and i love it. However one thing that only seems to happen late at night is when working with Eloquent i always end up putting () when working with relationships.
Last night i spent about 2 hours messing with
public function members(){
return $this->hasManyThrough(
'App\Member', 'App\ConversationMember',
'conversation_id', 'id', 'id'
);
}
only to find out i was calling it via
$conversation->members() instead of $conversation->members
This morning when i opened up the IDE i immediately figured out what i was doing wrong.... sometimes burning the late night oil is counter productive i guess you could say -
I found this article today ( http://thenextweb.com/apps/2016/... ) and within minutes my team started abusing poor scorebot on slack. Didn't take long until we had to uninstall.
-
For Hindi readers only!
Just wrote a poem which perfectly describe the conversation of two developers working on a project which has to be completed in very less time without compromising any feature.
4 -
When hesitating on the difference between blocking and non-blocking, I just consider the example of a typical conversation with a customer.
-
Avoiding using the line "...and this conversation is over" aka Suits-style, to simply STOP THE MADNESS!
-
In an interesting conversation with a windows user, I finally realized why people hate LibreOffice: it has like 2 templates, and both are shit.
Going to make some now, I hope they accept PRs. -
Facebook is testing out showing conversations in tabs to make sure you don't miss any conversation.
Looks like another good UX pattern.
-
We really out here still talking about the fucking weather as a conversation starter? This shit is painful.9
-
no ticket details
not giving me some useful documentation in our first conversation to clarify the ticket, that you have2 -
Fuck all these language exchange apps. No one replies your messages and those who do won't after your third so called "conversation".1
-
I believe Google assistant has a loooong way to go.
(the hand reference was from a previous part of the conversation based on "lamas with hats")
-
After the conversation, the real good way was already provided:
Prometheus exporter: https://github.com/prometheus/... (https://blog.opstree.com/2018/12/... for more details)
Overview: https://devconnected.com/complete-m...
1 -
I am so habitual to handling unexpected behaviours in Android to avoid crashes that even in real life most of my conversation with my brother is like what if it happens.. he'll be like we'll see when it does... I'll be like why not handling now... And the conversation goes on and on...
I guess my mind is trained now to handle null crashes, even in real life.1 -
When you have a coding issue you can't fix after numerous searching and debugging you give up and talk to somebody about it to see if they'd know what the cause is.
*40 mins later* the conversation is about security habits, cryptography coding and the ballmer peak.
Sit back down after the detailed conversation and realise I forgot to get assistance on the code issue.
Whelp! Maybe I'll look at refactoring now and perhaps start from scratch if I cant fix it. FML1 -
When someone starts of the conversation with...do you know anything about iOS SDKs 😒😒😒😒? You want me to do your project? No Thank you!1
-
FACEBOOK COMMON!
I get that they released the app because they had a deal with windows 10, but after so much time can't you at least improve it a tiny bit? Even with a webapp from messenger it works faster.
-I got a text
-Open the app
-LOADING
-LOADING| Got tired unlocked phone
-LOADING| turn on wifi
-LOADING| open the conversation
-LOADING CONVERSATION| replied
-FINALLY FINISHED AND I NO LONGER NEED IT
Now how to fix this? First try not to have a IOS imported app, try to add quick reply in the notification. YEP thats a thing! Skype UWP at least has that going for them.1 -
Them : "Well, I just tried what you told me on the deployed version and it works pretty well"
Me : "I actually just tried and it doesn't work"
That's some conversation to make my mood on a Monday -
Our manager held his house warming party at his house. Meeting in general to boss is so awkward . We went early so that we can avoid meeting him but shitt.. as reached he is greeting us at door 😂😂😂 and we have to go through an awkward conversation 🥴.2
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Just moved into a new dorm. Good lord what a fucking cold place. Unless I carry every frickin' conversation with these guys, they won't even look at me, let alone you know.. smile and say hi like normal persons.1
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conversation wth a progrmmr
Bab : hey hun when is your Birthday?
Jerk_Guy : import datetime
now = datetime.datetime.now()
now + datetime.timedelta(days=88)1 -
When I am involved in a conversation where people dig deep into a language and then turn to me for opinion and I don't know what to answer
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A good conversation should be like a mini skirt long enough to cover the topic and short enough retain interest2
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PHB stops by "to ask a quick question." EVIDENTLY I'M NOT BUSY NOR AM I EVER BUSY FOR QUICK QUESTIONS. Launches into HOUR LONG conversation.
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Just imagine Alexa, Google Assistant, Siri, and Cortana talking to each other. What will they talk about? and How good the conversation would be?6
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Same conversation
Young woman
Probably not so much younger
Same profession
Same real profession
What they’re doing who the hell knows
Happy valley
Incapable of conversation
Capable but unwilling for some reason
Kind of provokes me
I want her to say how she really feels
She works instead
It’s all they ever do anywhere these days
And hence why everything is so ducking repetitive
Maybe should have fucked her heh
Would have at least gotten us alone long enough to switch up conversations18 -
Maybe if I try to have a conversation with someone I won’t immediately regret it
You know just for something to keep me busy or something new ., sort of
They’re pretty boring creepy and empty headed -
I have a new idea for my discord bot. I want to make a very simple kind of conversation engine: basic replies to the user based on what they said. Sounds like a fun project.1
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I started a web animation library, because there were no satisfying lib's available...
And today I remembered a conversation with a teacher about the web animation api!
Fuck, I'm glad I rememberer that advice, safed me a lot of fucking around with js... -
just wondering what kind of haxor/devop are you if you can't fix your conversation opponent's windows/pc ?
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another week, same fuss. i just freaking can't wrap my head around the fact that it is basically not allowed to use natural language invocating a skill and use natural conversation flows.
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Syadmin: You can't use caffeine.
Me: How do you expect me to do my job without caffeine?!?
This conversation continued way longer than it should have today. (mostly my fault) -
That moment when you can actually squeeze your programming language into any conversation with your teammates
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the penny-arcade comic today has a part of a conversation I have had before.
me: ... I did some internet research.
friend: Google. First result. Okay, continue. -
You just had a conversation the other day with Zimmerman regarding how weird the rankings on xvideos are kind of indicating how screwed up our society is
He's been here the whole time4 -
I wanna learn/ teach web developing.
Drop your Skype id in the comments.
We will create a conversation.
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