Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
Search - "i am a programmer"
-
Stop f*cking calling me minority or part of a underrepresented group. Yeah I noticed I am one of the only women on a conference. I DONT CARE, I AM A PROGRAMMER NOT A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE. Hire me for my work, not because you want you company to be more diverse.50
-
Random : Hey you're a programmer right?
Me : Yeah? *excited about possibilities*
Random : I am having troubles installing a game I downloaded. I've been trying for three weeks now.
Me : *sigh* OK, I'll have a look, but I can't guarantee I'll get it right.
*Spend about 10 seconds installing game.*
Random : How did you do that?
Me : I read the error message, it was pointing to the wrong file.
Random : You are a god man *calls wife* come look at this genius. *calls daughter* look at that *calls dog* this guy is so amazing.
I also now avoid Random, he had three hard drives, each with a different version of Windows installed, he totally screwed his bios, he admitted not having put thermal paste on his cpu. And he asked me to fix all of this whenever I have time.
I am not your computer fixer guy. Take It to the shop.12 -
Dev confession.
Everybody in my department thinks I am a genius programmer.
I am just a better googler who knows how to apply things.13 -
Woke up last night after a dream and shouted to My girlfriend:
"this has to be a f**kin Boolean !!!!"
I think I am a fulltime 24/7 Programmer :D6 -
A programmer is walking along a beach and finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears. “I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish, but only one wish.”
The programmer pulls out a map, points to it and says, “I’d want peace in the Middle East.”
The genie responds, “Gee, I don’t know. Those people have been fighting for millenia. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits.”
The programmer then says, “Well, I am a programmer, and my programs have lots of users. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes.”
At which point the genie responds, “Um, let me see that map again.”4 -
Every non programmer freind of mine when I upload a single screenshot of my Terminal be like "Bro, What Is This Language?", "Do You Know How To Hack Wifi?" although reality been I am just cloning a GIT repository.10
-
Testivus On Test Coverage
Early one morning, a programmer asked the great master:
“I am ready to write some unit tests. What code coverage should I aim for?”
The great master replied:
“Don’t worry about coverage, just write some good tests.”
The programmer smiled, bowed, and left.
...
Later that day, a second programmer asked the same question.
The great master pointed at a pot of boiling water and said:
“How many grains of rice should I put in that pot?”
The programmer, looking puzzled, replied:
“How can I possibly tell you? It depends on how many people you need to feed, how hungry they are, what other food you are serving, how much rice you have available, and so on.”
“Exactly,” said the great master.
The second programmer smiled, bowed, and left.
...
Toward the end of the day, a third programmer came and asked the same question about code coverage.
“Eighty percent and no less!” Replied the master in a stern voice, pounding his fist on the table.
The third programmer smiled, bowed, and left.
...
After this last reply, a young apprentice approached the great master:
“Great master, today I overheard you answer the same question about code coverage with three different answers. Why?”
The great master stood up from his chair:
“Come get some fresh tea with me and let’s talk about it.”
After they filled their cups with smoking hot green tea, the great master began to answer:
“The first programmer is new and just getting started with testing. Right now he has a lot of code and no tests. He has a long way to go; focusing on code coverage at this time would be depressing and quite useless. He’s better off just getting used to writing and running some tests. He can worry about coverage later.”
“The second programmer, on the other hand, is quite experience both at programming and testing. When I replied by asking her how many grains of rice I should put in a pot, I helped her realize that the amount of testing necessary depends on a number of factors, and she knows those factors better than I do – it’s her code after all. There is no single, simple, answer, and she’s smart enough to handle the truth and work with that.”
“I see,” said the young apprentice, “but if there is no single simple answer, then why did you answer the third programmer ‘Eighty percent and no less’?”
The great master laughed so hard and loud that his belly, evidence that he drank more than just green tea, flopped up and down.
“The third programmer wants only simple answers – even when there are no simple answers … and then does not follow them anyway.”
The young apprentice and the grizzled great master finished drinking their tea in contemplative silence.
Found on stack overflow https://stackoverflow.com/questions...8 -
I met my girlfriend due to code.
There were these free courses for competitive programming as a preparation for the informatics olympiad and we got along and made weird programs and had a great time. Most of the other people there were much younger than us, and in the actual finals she ended up beating me by quite a bit, yet she still dares to say I am a better programmer.
It's been almost a year since then. Wow20 -
!rant
You know those dudes that dress up spiffy and try to sell you cable providers for tv and shit. Well, i normally stream everything from my computers and do not really have any need for actual tv, my flatscreen is mostly used for my ps4 or switch and das it.
So these guys stop me at walmart and start trying to sell me this provider, i normally listen and give everyone a chance since they b only doing their job. Afterwards I tell them that i use one of those roku or amazon sticks and that I am fine with it. Well one of them insists in that those are not good since **fake made up technical shit** and that unless I am a programmer I would not know how to work around them.
I smile. Hehe.....hehe.....muahahahaha and tell them that I do not worry about such things since I am a software engineer. My wife passes by and confirms "yup, computer scientist, spends his days thinkering with shit"
One of them looks at the other and says "fuck it dude we lost"
Lol, gracious in the face of defeat.8 -
So a fucking friend of mine makes me meet this fella who is a big shot according to his LinkedIn and please note has too much experience with Web Apps and Python
Me being naive actually trusted that and I meet him.
Fella: So what do you do?
Me: I am into Cyber Security nothing much I just do bug hunting for now
Fella: You know python will help you right?
Me: Sorry?
Fella: You see you have to be a python programmer for anything you want to do in CS
Me: Me yeah I kinda know python actually I am more into Ruby from start so ( Around this time I kinda sensed that he is a fake tech guy he is a corporate asshole)
Fella: show me any of your work
Me: (So to show him one of the thing I was working on I open GitHub desktop app) Me explaining blah blah blah
*Fella is in shock*
So at this point I was thinking probably he is impressed and that's why the shock right?
No a big fucking no
Apparently he never heard about GitHub or git and got blown away by the interface.
And the friend who made me meet that guy is not my fucking friend anymore that prick can die for ruining my day18 -
- - What do you do for living?
- I am a programmer.
- - So you can hack a Facebook account?
- *bleeding inside*9 -
I am a programmer, and if you ask me to fix your pc, I accept the challenge... After all, I can Google a problem and implement a solution like no other, you are right to have come to me.5
-
I think I get a programmer high.
Like when I program, I get really into it, time is flying, I'm having fun problem solving, I am super focused, my brain is thinking super fast, and I have a hard time stopping.
Maybe similar to a runners high?9 -
"Hey nephew, why doesn't the FB app work. It shows blank white boxes?"
- It can't connect or something? (I stopped using the FB app since 2013.)
"What is this safe mode that appeared on my phone?!"
- I don't know. I don't hack my smartphone that much. Well, I actually do have a customised ROM. But stop! I'm pecking my keyboard most of the time.
"Which of my files should I delete?"
- Am I supposed to know?
"Where did my Microsoft Word Doc1.docx go?"
- It lets you choose the location before you hit save.
"What is 1MB?"
- Search these concepts on Google. (some of us did not have access to the Internet when we learned to do basic computer operations as curious kids.)
"What should I search?"
- ...
"My computer doesn't work.. My phone has a virus. Do you think this PC they are selling me has a good spec? Is this Video Card and RAM good?"
- I'm a programmer. I write code. I think algorithmically and solve programming problems efficiently. I analyse concepts such as abstraction, algorithms, data structures, encapsulation, resource management, security, software engineering, and web development. No, I will not fix your PC.7 -
A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish."
The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like there to be a just and last peace among the people in the middle east."
The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting since the beginning of time. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond my limits."
The programmer then said, "Well, I am a programmer and my programs have a lot of users. Please make all the users satisfied with my programs, and let them ask sensible changes"
Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."1 -
So I just graduated college last month. I had been in this internship for about three months. In the last month I lead a team that developed and integrated a chat application into a Booking Website for enterprises. (They handle bulk bookings for seminars, travel, etc. flights, hotels, local transport, etc).
Anyways I’ve always wondered when I can consider myself a “real programmer.” This is my first completed project and I am very proud of it!
Also I got a job with the Hotel company to maintain among other things 😀
I’m a software Developer! (Erm, or programmer?)
Dreams do come true! 😀8 -
I am a hobby programmer. I just got rejected by the biggest crush of my life. I guess I'm stuck with my stupid wothless fucking life writing code. How fucking exciting....22
-
[SO] Can you unload the dishwasher?
[Me] Of course.
*5 hours later*
[SO] Why is the dishwasher still not done ?
[Me] Why would it be ?
[SO] I asked you to unload it ....
[Me] No, you asked if I CAN do it, and I am able to do it, you didn't ask me to actually do it.
[SO thinking] God, why did I marry a fucking programmer.....12 -
If I run into a problem with code or a configuration of some kind, like a good little programmer, I Google it.
One of two things will happen:
1) I quickly find the answer to my problem.
or
2) After hours of searching, I can't find anything about my problem. At all. I change the search phrasing, adjust the advanced search settings, read all the somewhat related but still unrelated articles. Nothing.
If #1 happens, awesome, life is great, thanks Internet!
If #2 happens, it's because of one of two things:
1) I am the first person in the world to stumble upon this issue. Quick! To the Blog Cave!
2) I AM TOO STUPID TO BE DOING WHAT I AM TRYING TO DO BECAUSE MY MISTAKE IS SO UNBELIEVABLY DUMB THAT NO ONE HAS BOTHERED NOR WILL BOTHER TO WRITE ABOUT IT, ANYWHERE, EVER. I LOOK AT MY WORK AGAIN FOR THE 100TH TIME AND FINALLY REALIZE MY EMBARRASSING NOOBERY.
2.1 is a unicorn. 2.1's happen to other people.
I am dealing with a 2.2.2 -
The Absolutely True Story of a Real Programmer Who Never Learned C.
I have a young friend named Sam who is quite a programming prodigy. Sam does know C! I need to make this clear: he’s not the titular programmer.
But a couple years ago Sam told me a story about a different programmer who never learned C, and I liked it so much that right on the spot I asked his permission to repeat it. (I could never just steal such a tale.)
Sam wasn’t always a programmer—actually he started in his later teens, in part because he was more of a jock, and in part because he was related to programmers and wanted to do his own thing. But, like all great programmers, once he was bitten by the bug he immersed himself completely in it.
One day Sam happened to be talking programming with his uncle, who was also a programmer but from way, way back.
“Hey,” said Sam, “I’m learning this language called C. You must know a lot of languages, did you ever study C?”
“No,” said the uncle, to Sam’s surprise. “I am one of the very few programmers who never had to learn C.”
“Because I wrote it.”
Oh, Sam’s last name is Ritchie.
What I love about this story is the idea of Dennis waiting Sam’s entire life to deliver this zinger. Just imagine sitting on a line that good, watching your nephew grow up and waiting, waiting until the one day he finally starts learning to code. Did he work on the line in his head at night? Like, “Hmm, how should I word it so I can deliver the punch line perfectly? Should I say ‘I never took a class on C?’ Nah, too awkward…”
The great thing about geniuses is how much effort they put into everything.
Courtesy : Wil Shiply.5 -
My dad said to me once: "Son, when you're older... you can become anything you want. The sky is the limit!"
So my response: "Really dad? Wow!! I want to become an astronaut!!"
My dad: "God damnit son... why don't you ever listen?! I said the SKY is the limit!!"
So now I am a very down to earth programmer.4 -
My first poem for programmer girl 😘😘😘
My life is incomplete without you,
You are semicolon of my life
You are my increment operator,
you make my value increases
I am username and you are my password,
without you No one can access me
You are my initializer,
without you my life would point to nothing (NULL or “0”)
If I were a function you must be my parameter,
Because I will always need you
Can you be my private variable?
I want to be only one who can access you
You are my compiler,
My life wouldn’t start without you
You are my loop condition ,
I keep coming back to you
My love to you is like recursive function,
It will never ends & Will never enter into infinite loop
Forever and Ever10 -
I got arrested multiple times under acts of cyber crimes...
Yeah, so what if I did? Why is it a problem that I take down CP sites? "Because it's partaking in cyber warfare." Well then the police and the Federal government should execute their job keeping such out of the web space. Now, whenever I find a job, I have to inform due to the judge's final document. And not just that now when I am required to talk to a police officer who has seen my record all they can reckon is to escalate it.
What fantastic horse crap! You get arrested for tracking down child molesters and taking them off the web exclusively...
Some say I'm a social justice warrior, only I don't think that I am. I reckon I am merely an over eccentric programmer who desires to see the real criminals get sent to jail.30 -
When I started my job a year ago, I felt impostor syndrome. Now I think everyone around me is a fucking moron and I'm an elite programmer.
Am I just an asshole, or has my journey with this company expired?12 -
ok people where is the gender equality??? why do people assume that im studying tourism when its so clear that i am not
cant a girl be a programmer and not the girly ground stewardess checking-in the baggages at the airport?
programming isnt only for men. women can also be great developers because we can be as capable as men. people need to stop the stereotypes jeez33 -
As a programmer, I either feel like I’m a god and I’m superior to everyone in this company OR I am an idiot and everyone knows what they are doing except me.
Programming is an illusion. It’s just a “feeling”. Programming doesn’t exist.11 -
So, I've been a programmer for 2 years and still don't like coffee.
Do I need therapy? Am I the chosen one? Should I switch to Java?11 -
> Last year of study
> I see a new face
> Maybe new friend?
> He asked me what am I doing in live
> Front-end my friend :)
> So you are not real programmer :O
> Wtf with these people
> Should I kill him?8 -
Me: I develop Applications.
Stranger: Oh so you are a programmer.
Me: Yup 😎
Stranger: Please hack my ex's insta.
Me: I am not a hacker nor am I intrested in learning to hack. I develop stuff from scratch. Innovate and contribute something to society.
Stranger: Oh, what a disappointment. Why did you say you are a programmer then.
Me: I...~am 😶
For some, hacking is the only programming thing for them. I get message at least once a month from someone requesting to hack someones fb,insta or some account.
Thinking of creating a bot which finds such keywords in my messages and automatically replies to them explaining what I really do. Or just f***ing block them.7 -
You know you're a programmer when you're doing math and you write == instead of = (Am I the only one who does this?)12
-
my story so far
Hey guys. i just wantes to share my story becoming something i think is like a dev.
I was always interested in solving problems. my grandfather has a company with a bit over a 100 employees. one day i decided to start working there. he needed someone to build up the erp system (mostly maintenance). about a month after i started he decided to get a new erp system because the one he had would not fill his needs. not knowing how big this got i told him that i want to build it up. from getting the orders over production with machines to billing.
he agreed. after a short time we knew that even this new system does not fullfill our needs. but it was so damn expensive. i told my grandfather: trust me, i am handling this. no further costs. and i started to learn programming. i learned night and day (visual basics.net, sql, c#). since then i wrote about 8 additional modules for the system in coorperation with the users. today, 3 years later we are far ahead our market in terms of transparency and information flow. i worked very hard for this and it is a great feeling to see that the things i do help my colleagues and are used.
i never learned this stuff in school and i know that i cannot tell that i am a professional programmer.
but when someone asks me i tell them i am a programmer because my solutions work and i think i deserve to call me that.
thanks for reading :)4 -
I'm a shit programmer
I'm 29 and I assumed that by this point I'd be successful some way or another, either by being financially abundant or technically complex.
I am not, just mildly accomplished instead.
Here'a list of thing I consider challenges that I have:
* I tend to tunnel vision ideas that are terrible or execute them poorly because of said tunnel vision.
* I don't hone my skills, I usually consider my potentials the same as my actuals, as if I achieved everything already, probably product of ny huge ego.
* I communicate poorly with my boss, I sidetrack into thing he didn't ask
* I'm a mess when it comes to reading documentation online, I have the attention span of a fucking fish.
* I work alone, I have 0 networking status or skills.
* I take huge amounts of time to finish my side projects
* Of all the side projects I started I only finished one, the ones that I couldn't finish usually bevame insabely stressful things, so much and so many that I questioned myself many times if I should be a programmer or not.
* I have little discipline or organization, if I work in more than one thing at a time, i get really anxious and stressed.
I am not saying I'm not competent, I think I am (I'm looking at you imaginary scary recruiter googling this online), I'm just not really proud of myself26 -
I'm been hacking together software for the last year or so now and I've never considered myself to be a good programmer.
Today however I had to implement an A* search from scratch and with only the knowledge of how the algorithm should function I put together some code that looked correct.
I went to run my code expecting one of the typical "Index out of bound", "null reference", "something has not be initialised" BUT I was shocked to find that the code worked flawlessly.
I went into a weird state of shock and disbelief. I'm not naturally gifted at this stuff, so it was just really hard for me to accept that I might actually be getting better to the point where I might be able to say "I am a programmer"
Does anyone else get bad imposter syndrome?6 -
"Hey I am a programmer too! I can code anything, I bet I'm better than you!"
-
"Huh, that sounds cool! What languages do you like to write your programs in?"
-
............ "English"
🤦🏻♂🤦🏻♂
True story by the way, some guy I just met did this. I was not sure how to react. Should I laugh? Should I cry? Should I kill myself? Should I kill him?10 -
best friend works at a gym, and he always remind me to exercise.
him: bro when was the last time you workout?
me: every fucking day.
him: what?
me: I am a programmer bro, everyday is brain day.2 -
Am I only one thinking that Linux is kind ok cliche among programmers. Some of them brag about using Ubuntu over Windows like it makes you a better programmer. I have seen brilliant Windows developers and shitty Linux developers. My point is not that Windows is better, just stop bragging that you are using Ubuntu, it does not make you smart or better than others.20
-
I've been a programmer for years now. I've slowly been getting promotions and I'm a senior developer at a large company.
to anyone I look as if I am an extremely good programmer however I constantly feel out of place. I feel like I am way worse at coding than my co-workers and people underneath me but I keep getting complimented on it.
I feel like a fake.
does anyone else feel this?15 -
Friend: hey can you make me a website?
Me: sure, what is it for?
Friend: 'whatever the site is for'
Me: Ok, what are the different tabs you want for the navigation bar?
Friend: Ummm... Idk yet
Me: Ok... So do you have an idea what you want the website to look like?
Friend: Ummm just make it look pretty
Me:undefined guess will try something i'm a programmer not a designer areyoureallyreadyforwebsite whyevenask am i the only one here2 -
My mother is the one that introduced me to computers from a young age. She would tell me that they were the future and that people could do amazing things with them. Fast forward at me graduating from uni with a B.S in Computer science and she was the happiest :) she tells everyone that I am a computer scientist, she seldom says "programmer" or "developer". She is super well versed in general computing and can use Linux and Mac, so yeah :) mom is awesome. My dad has lil idea of what I do, to him its just magic, my step dad is the same way but he will be the first to tell everyone that I am a wizard.
My brother and sister could care less...my sister tells everyone that I am the smartest person she knows, but that I spend most of my time glued to the screen "playing with a bunch of weird code!"
The rest of my family is pretty meh about it, 2 of my uncles are super proud of it and normally ask for my input regarding tech or about life as a dev.
Finally, the wife. The wife knows how to code from before I even knew what code was :) so she knows exactly what I do :)8 -
So apparently I am not a programmer because I turn tea into software. :(
Anyone else feeling discriminated by this definition? :D11 -
Hey DevRant!
I've been lurking for a few weeks now, and it bothered me that I couldn't like/dislike posts, so I finally decided to make an account. :D
I am currently a programming student, I'm in my third year. I started learning with C# but later I switched to Python, PHP and HTML5.
There's still many things I want to learn, this is just the beginning of my long, stressful yet rewarding life as a programmer. (:12 -
Junior coder says validation is not needed on asp.net mvc form pages because it is not in the requirements or part of the definition of done. Wants to argue about it. Refuses to do it. Says I am over optimizing or some shit like that. Good luck with that. If you can't figure that one out or listen to feedback perhaps you should become a project manager not a programmer.11
-
How do I don’t over complicate things?
Background: I’m currently working for a game with some base project. It alr has pretty complicated ai and some other system.
Today, I was asked by boss to help him set up a test environment for testing taking damage of a character.
First I tried to read up how the battle system and ai works in the base project. Figured, it’s overkill for this testing purpose.
Then, tried to use some plugin to automate the ai and movement. Make the enemy follow the target and stuff.
Alr spending half day, then suddenly realised all I need is just to make one script that takes damage on collision.
Why am I still a programmer? 😭6 -
Some days am broke 😣
Some days am rich 🤑
Some days am nice ☺
Some days I can be a d*#k 😠
Some days am strong 💪
Some days I quit 😞
But I get up and move on 🚶🏾
Coz am a PROGRAMMER 👨🏾💻2 -
After one year of learning to code I am still not sure if I am an adequate programmer or a really effective Google user...5
-
I am a PM for a private project with a few friends, I am also the main programmer.. Is this the reason I hate myself?3
-
Well, i have a few stories i would like to share with you :)
My neighbour asked me to fix her webcam.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a repair service .
Next time my neighbour forgot her Skype password. Se asked me to hack it for her.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a hacker.
My sister asked me to help her out in her program, because of some bug. Well, she is in the other part of the Country. But, i said, lets give it a try.
Well, it turned out to be some kind of mechanical remote scanner, with needed that exact same remote locally.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a fictional remote signal scanner repairer.
My grandpa asked me, to copy his old gmail emails into his new laptop.
Well, i told him to log in. He logged in. Than i told him: It is done :D
Thanks for reading it :)4 -
So, today I asked my senior developer a query he took my laptop and changed the ide theme to black.
My doubts were solved, I am enlightened programmer now.8 -
Interviewer called me useless for reason that I am a self taught programmer and don't have a degree. She told me that I will have no future. Because self taught are just useless who who try to fit in the club.
This personally offend me so much. Yes, I'm self taught. At least I have a heart of learning rather than being arrogant ....40 -
My fiance is also a programmer. He doesn't say he loves me often, but than he does it looks/sounds like ''I [less than 3] you'' 🙃
Or he will prefers to ask me what am I cooking for dinner by using arduino & a display 🙄1 -
Some are taking it as a holiday, others still have to meet deadlines while being quarantined.
Source: I am Programmer,I have no life.5 -
I learn programming cause it was in my genes.
My father was a programmer himself but, he died back in 2005 of September when I was 5 years old. So I guess I program to continue what he did. He was in the process of making a game but, failed to do it. He had concept art created and even mad characters. When I get real good, I plan to program that game for him and dedicate it to him.
I started programming on a website called Scratch back in 2010 (in think), which I saw a Ted Talk on, and started from there. I use KhanAcademy as I am home schooled and when they introduced the programming tutorials to that website, I was immediately hooked and it was just the beginning.
I used Scratch for three years and I wanted to know more, so I did research and discovered a program called Stencyl and started making a game I made from scratch into that format.
I used that program and when 2013 hit, moved to a new church and met an old friend and all of sudden we started making games together and we relesed our first game on Scratch called Minecart Chaos.
That took three months to create. He did all the art and I, of course, did the programming. The three months later we were at it again making a new game called EMP Restaurant Rampage. That also took three months to create. one of his friends composed the music. We are now in the process on making a new game and I am now tasked to make the music. So that is my history.9 -
Can't tell what my most successful project is...
But according to GitHub Stars, my
most successful project is my RandomQuote Bot (@RandomQuote).
The story behind it is pretty boring:
One day little Skayo thought: "Hey there is no bot on DevRant yet, let's make one!".
Then he began to think: "But what should it do? What would be easy to do for an inexperienced programmer like me?".
Suddenly he got an idea: A Bot that posts a random quote everyday!
Yay!
He instantly started making it.
About a day later, it was finished.
"Let's bring this thing to live", he thought.
And there he was, quickly getting a lot of fucking ++'s...
This bot is like my first born child! I am so proud of him!
And that's the story behind the bot.
Very spectacular, isn't it?4 -
I am in programmer hell today.
Oh great programmers of the universe, lend me your strength so that I do not leave work a shattered soul on this day!5 -
Okay, this has to be said.
I am sick and tired of YouTube web devs who went to bootcamp, developed software for around 1 year, quit… then tell everybody what it’s like to be a “programmer.”
To top it off they become “developer advocates.”
Stop misleading people with your clickbait!14 -
To become a programmer, you must at least once
1) sacrifice your weekend
2) sacrifice your sleep on the weekend
3) have an experience with non stop coding at least 3 days, working at home is an exception
this rule applies when you get a job working as a wageslave, rushing on a tight deadline
its almost 2 am here, and im at the office pushing and fixing bug codes for beta launch for tomorrow. this is all because of this one outsourcing company my boss hired that does the backend api keeps on changing and delaying stuff.
i guess im just fine with this, knowing that i have fulfilled all 3 rules before.6 -
I feel that I should mention my reason for having joined devRant.
Although I often write computer programs, I do not consider myself to be a computer programmer, for the problems which I solve often do not pertain to the method which I use to solve a problem with a computer program. Rather, I am an intelligence analyst, and this has been my title for approximately sixteen (16) years.
I joined devRant not only because I wished to better the computer programs which I write, although this could be better accomplished by again reading the specifications for the programming languages which I use, but also because I wished to join an on-line community of which the members are interesting and competent. As I read threads, I observe that both of these requirements have been matched, with the emphasis being placed on the latter requirement.
I thank the majority of you for maintaining an on-line community which is not (total) crap. Ha.9 -
Just blowing off steam with y'all. It will sound confused, but it's just all of my depressive thoughts mashed up in a rant.
So, here I am.
Surrounded by incompetent professors who are unable to point me in the right direction, that rarely even know what they are 'teaching'. In a moment of total loss, that has been lasting for months. Totally lost my motivation and my will to pursue a career in IT. All I do is game, eat, sleep, repeat. I am exhausted mentally. When I get back from school, I can't think of anything else but to relax and do nothing. I am frustrated. I care about becoming a programmer, but I can't find my inner strenght. School draws all of my strenght and willpower away from me, and therefore I get distracted very easily. I just do not know what to do anymore. I want to keep going, but I am stuck, unable to do so. "Perhaps this is just not for me" is what keeps resounding inside my head, but I do not truly believe it. I just wish that all of this stress would just disappear, and allow me to do what I care about. I need help to find the needed focus to continue.21 -
I was fresh out of college, love Java and looking for a job.
Well, after exact 1 month I sucked the reality. I found an Ad for a designer and got selected. Point is I mention my qualification in high school because I was feeling bad to disclose my higher degree for such a job.
I worked for 6 months there and every day was like working as the covert operative. I always knew I can write an automated script for all that daily shit. But for the sake of the landlord rent, I kept quiet. (I literally care for his children, I was the only source of income)
Then, my friend that day 16-Sep-2012 I wrote a program to do all the repetitive thing I used to do.
My boss found out and I expose my self as Spiderman do to Jen, Sir! I am a Programmer.
Sadly it was, no surprise to him. He said, on your first day I found out that you are not high school. Because with such accuracy only a graduate can do such level of the job.
He praised me and motivated me, my first non-technical master.1 -
Our junior programmer is stuck in a do-while loop. He starts with a normal question, and then each question after will be "But Why ?", until I am ready to throttle him, or I run out of memory.5
-
Read some books
Get a computer
Write some codes
Use Linux
Hate Microsoft
Argue Vim vs Emacs
Debate 4 spaces vs tabs
Use dark themes
Follow buzzwords..
Now repeat after me, "I am a programmer...."4 -
While I was in university, I used to be a good programmer (which I still am :D ), my friends used to copy my code for the assignments. One day, the teacher (one of my my mentors) called me in his office and said, "this is your code".
I'm like, in my mind, "How did he know this?"
The teacher said, "If you let others copy your code one more time, I will fail you".
I nodded my head in affirmation.
Later I understood that I've been a "Clean code" principle follower even before I knew this term. So, it was pretty easy to differentiate my codes from my friends. The teacher is really a genius ^_^5 -
When I am telling non-tech people that I am studying Software Engineering:
They: What do you study at university?
Me: Software Engineering
They: Oh, so you're an engineer! My *some random person* is also an engineer!
Me: No, not that kind of engineer. I am a SOFTWARE engineer. I don't build things.
They: huh?
Me: I write code. Programs. For computers. I a programmer.
They: oh, great, very perspective! Will you fix my *PC/printer/whatever has on/off button on it*?
😶😶😶4 -
Can someone just please come over and safe me? I am soooooo done with all this bullshit code. I understand why people loathe PHP, it enables totally worthless people to carry the title 'programmer' because hurrrdurrr look at my website, I made this. Fuck yes, you made that and you should SHAME yourself! What the actual flying fuck I can't begin to explain the monstrosities that I find checking out this worthless pile of fucking garbage.
User passwords saved as plaintext in database? Check!
Using hungarian notation, camecase and snakecase inconsistently? Check!
Typejuggling like you're the mainman of the Insane Clown Posse? Check!
Everything is a mess, there is no documenation, no consistency no nothing, this is straight from the 9th circle of programmers hell.
Aaaaaaarghhhhh I AM SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS WORTHLESS PILE OF GARBAGE!!!!
The original dev prefixed every spagetthifile with his copyright shite so im gonna look him up and highfive him in the face with my laptop and after that printing out my resignation letter in comic sans fontsize 78 because FUCK YOU
So done.7 -
Ok Now I am getting fed up of
"I am programmer , someone gave me printer/mobile/tv to repair" jokes/rants/memes.
Once or twice is fine. Now they are just reposts with slightly different content. Not funny anymore. Just irritating.
Why do people have to follow a trend here. Have some ingenuity guys.8 -
Client: I don't know programming. But I think you should make the button more fancy?
Me: ... I am not Harry Potter, don't imagine programming like magic. And you ain't even a programmer...
Daily conversation with our precious client2 -
Those weeks when you get calls from recruiters offering you up to four times your current salary.
I enjoy my job, love the atmosphere, team spirit, freedom (although sometimes there's a bit too much of this!), but I have a family and am saving to extend our house.
I don't want to let my team down, I'm the only programmer dev in a team of 3 (others do front end web design but not much JS), but sometimes I wonder if I should pursue one of these better offers...5 -
Today was a day at work that I felt like I made a significant contribution. It was not a lot of code. Actually it was a difference of 3 characters.
I am developing an industrial server so that my employer can provide access to their machines to enterprise industrial systems. You know, the big boys toys. Probably in fucking java...
Anyway, I am putting this server on an embedded system. So naturally you want to see how much serving a server can serve. In this case the device in more processor starved than memory starved. So I bumped up the speed of the serving from 1000mS to 100mS per sample. This caused the processor to jump from 8% of one core (as read from top) to 70%. Okay, 10x more sampling then 10x approx cpu usage. That is good. I know some basic metrics for a certain amount of data for a couple of different sampling rates.
Now, I realized this really was not that much activity for this processor. I mean, it didn't seem to me that it "took much" to see a large increase of processor usage. So I started wondering about another process on the system that was eating 60 to 70 % all the time. I know it updated a screen that showed some not often needed data from its display among controlling things. Most of the time it will be in a cabinet hidden from the world. I started looking at this code and figured out where the display code was being called.
This is where it gets interesting. I didn't write this code. Another really good programmer I work with wrote this. It also seemed to be pretty standard approach. It had a timer that fired an event every 50mS. This is 20 times per second. So 20 fps if you will. I thought, What would happen if I changed this to 250mS? So I did. It dropped the processor usage to 15%! WTF?! I showed another programmer: WTF?! I showed the guy who wrote it: WTF?! I asked what does it do? He said all it does it update the display. He said: Lets take to 1000mS! I was hesitant, but okay. It dropped to 5%!
What is funny is several people all said: This is running kinda hot. It really shouldn't be this hot.
Don't assume, if you have a hunch, play with it if its safe to do so. You might just shave off 55 to 60 % cpu usage on your system.
So the code I ended up changing: "50" to "1000".16 -
So here I am in class with just two weeks of knowledge in coding and this douchebag level 300 comes in like, 'Hey i'm a hacker and mid tier programmer and i can see you struggling with your basic code can i be of help?'... so I'm like, 'yh man. I'm a transfer biology student and i don't know a sh*t about coding but i have managed to buid a fine website of just two pages but i would also like to try hacking but first what programming languages do you know?' Guess what......the lil f*cker said HTML. I mean I may not know much but i know that can and will never be a programming language.11
-
Boss is also a programmer which is nice. boss is also incredibly impatient. so when he gives me a project to do, when I don't have it done the day of, he goes and does it over the weekend. but he doesn't tell until a few days later when I finish the following Tuesday. he chucked my git branch and just pushed his stuff to master. then he belittled me because there was a feature missing in his code and I hadn't done it yet. I don't know how to deal with this. on the one hand, I could try and work faster. but on the other, I am trying to add features to software he wrote in c-style c++, didn't comment, and hasn't been updated to modern standards since 1998. even the copyright files are 1997 to 2001. just very discouraged as its my first job in the field. it wouldn't have been so frustrating if he had just told me he'd worked on it himself instead of letting me finish it and then throwing it in the trash.
end rant8 -
Hey Designer/Developers, I got a question for you. Yeah, you 👇🏽
When working on a project codebase that is expected to grow and evolve heavily. How do you usually split up your CSS (SASS, LESS etc) in a good way to take into account all the different device sizes?
I am not asking how it is done but more about the design of the code. This would be for a production codebase to be released.
Do you use large blocks broken down by media...
(Media width) {
~site code
}
(Other media) {
~same site code with diff sizes
}
Or do you do individual media queries inside css classes...
.className {
(Media size) {
}
(Other media) {
}
}
Or a mixture of both?
If it is a mixture of both then how do you decide which way to go about structuring the code.
I have been endeavouring to greatly improve my CSS and have done so. But this question has been bugging me. Both sides seem to be a bit sloppy and my programmer side is fighting the repeatitipve code.
Note: all code examples are gibberish and only intended for visualization.17 -
Today I reached a point where I made an really bad looking, uneficient, unreadable function, but it works!, That's what counts right?!
Just kidding, I just couldn't fix it, hopefully the me from tomorrow will be smarter.7 -
At what point can you say you are a programmer of a language? Is there an exact amount of lines of code carved in stone somewhere? I call myself a Python Programmer because even know I am self tought, I have been working with the language for years and I am very good with it. "Professional" level by some accounts, though I wouldn't go as far to say that myself. I have been working with Java a couple of weeks and it has been going very well, but I wouldn't call myself a Java programmer, but should I? At what point does one pass that line?
Idk.. Just a little shower thought for ya. What do you think?29 -
Not a Story about an actual hack, but a story about people being dumb and using hacks as an excuse.
A few weeks ago my little cousin would reach out to me because "his Account was hacked...". Supposedly his League of Legends account was hacked by a guy of his own age (14) and this guy was boasting about it.
So i asked the usual things: "Has the email account been hijacked? Did anyone know about details to your acvount access? Etc..."
Turns out that one if his "friends" knew his password and username, but suppsedly erased these Informationen. And that was the part i didn't buy.
This was the point where he lost. Just because i am a programmer does not mean i can retrieve an account he lost because of a dumb mistake that could have easily been avoided. And that guy who was boasting about hacking LoL Account was coincidentally freinds with the friend who had the user credentials and password.
Moral of the Story? The biggest security weakness is almost always the user or a human in between... -
So I am getting back into game dev. I keep going back and forth about making a 2D or 3D rpg. Maybe I will end up making a mix.
I also want to make customizable characters in game. I found a decent solution for 2D. An artist is making 2D sprites that allow things to be overlaid. Each component has animations. I can layer sprites and animate them in sync to keep all the pieces moving together.
For 3D this journey of what is possible is a lot longer I think. It is hit or miss finding generic 3D characters with build in morphing. I want to be able to change the body for customization. I think I will have to relearn how to 3D model. As I learn what kind of model I need I am also learning what it takes to do this in Blender. And holy hell, Blender is so amazing now! The stuff I can do easily is staggering. You can sculpt a mesh using sculpting tools. Then do a remesh of that to make a more easily animateable mesh. No remeshing by hand, other than installing a plugin. There are a bunch of plugins that you can buy too. I found one for free that looks promising. But the paid ones are not that bad either. Between $25 to $100 depending upon source, license, and features.
However, being a programmer I want to figure out how to generate 3D and 2D models. There is code out there to do this, but I wonder what the learning curve is on that. The engineer side of me wants to be able to model the shape of humanoids and then auto skin that. I think I will start with modeling a few by hand to learn the way it should work. I want a simple anime look. I did find info on automating face rigs and body rigs. Oh the tools we have now!
Anyway, I am having fun.15 -
I became a programmer so that I could have the privilege of working remotely. So I am at home, my mom's place that is. I can never get in the "concentration zone" first thing in the morning, because before I know it, my mother and sister are having some stupid heated up argument about clothes and shit, and it bothers me anyway through my headphones -.-
Now I think I'd rather work in an office.8 -
So to start off, I am a hipster. Guilty as charged. A few months ago.
Me and my work's programming team decided to enter a hackathon. Note, I had never stayed awake for 48 hours straight programming before.
It was late and I was waiting on programmer 1 to finish writing a class so I can finish a part of the network code. We were all working on the same git repository, same branch for some reason at the time.
So I started just writing in random comments in the code while waiting. I finally got to complete the network and committed my work.
They both made a pull about the same time and both my boss and coworker turned around at the same time.
I had written a comment
// Ya know those glasses I wear to work everyday? They're not prescription. They're fake.
The look of disappointment just staring me down was absolutely priceless. And the fact that they both read the comment at the same time.. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 -
Got error: I am such a noob programmer, dumb, I hate my life, I hate programming... *cries like a kid*
Error fixed: I am God!2 -
Alright. It's one of these rants that everyone despises. The help me rant. Now before you tell me to google, I have, but I want a more personal opinion on the matter.
I am fluent in JAVA, C#, C++, and a few more, but I have never done web development.
I want to get the fuck out of my current job (I got screamed at because I didn't do the PABX guy's work - I am a fucking programmer not a technician), and start a venture there.
Now I know that I have to learn HTML, CSS, JS -> what more do I need to know to code a fully functional website? I don't mind learning any languages, I like learning. It sounds naive and perhaps stupid, but I am asking for some educated opinions.
Thanks, and soon I will be the fuck out of this hellhole.5 -
Friend: Is this Nvidia GTX 440 a good graphics card?
Me: idk
Friend: if i get it how do i put it in my computer
Me: idk
Friend: but you are a programmer
Me: exactly, i am not an engineer9 -
I wish my classmates didn’t know that I’m good at programming.
Recently, more and more often I am being reached out to by my classmates (and especially by one individual) about the problems they’re having issues with. For example yesterday, a guy fucked up his Git commit and made a bunch of merge conflicts, so I helped him fix this, which then lead to WinForms having multiple declarations of same objects.
And I really don’t wanna be rude, and I always try to help, for the love of god - stop bothering me every 5 minutes while I code, or at 10 PM while I wanna chill out.
Most of the things they have problems with can be solved by 2 minute Googling and I strongly believe that at the university level, you should be able to find solutions for your problems yourself - especially when you’re a programmer.18 -
Not quite a rant... more of a question.
So, I'm almost 40 years old. I have a lot of work experience in varying fields, much of it in low-level management.
Truth is I've ALWAYS wanted to be a programmer.
I recently got into a somewhat competitive training program
where I'm learning to write Java, and will subsequently learn Android development. It's fairly in-depth, so it will take 10 moths to complete. My ultimate goal it's to work as a mobile dev at a great company, making products people love. Ambitious, I know.
My question is: Am I a fool for attempting to get into this field at this age? I'm starting to panic a little. I'm not sure if I'm wasting my time, or if 40 is too old to be the "newbie".
Thoughts?13 -
I don't know why I am a programmer. I went into engineering because I wanted to make video games. I did controls engineering to make physical systems go vroom. Now I mainly write software to make specialized physical systems go vroom. When I was a kid this was not what I would have wanted to do with my life. My 10 year old version of me is standing over me looking down saying "Pathetic". I feel like I need to do something about this before I die.
I want to make a game system for RPGs that is similar to an authoring tool to allow me to make games with some very specific features. Think creation kit for arbitrary RPG games. I am thinking I could make the authoring tool a product as well. If people want to make their own games. But I also want to make moddable RPG games using the authoring tool. I want to give people the ability to mod the game. So I am struggling with how to allow modding and sell an authoring tool. License to distribute unique games? I dunno, maybe I will just keep it as a modding tool for the games I make. I feel like good quality games are moddable. I hardly want to play anything that isn't.7 -
I just wanted to get this off my chest.
There we go, that time is finally coming: all of my friends are starting to look for jobs; we are all about to graduate, but i feel no desire to move forward... I wish i had their optimism, but all i feel is terror and panic every time they bring up the topic...
I have no plan, no idea of what might happen, and i don't feel like i am particularly competent in anything: I do not have much to offer to society, surely not in terms of technical skills: i'm a real shitty programmer with the attention span of a goldfish.
I am passionate about a bunch of topics, but i am not competent at them in any meaningful way: I like reading about x86 Assembly or Operating System design, but if you'd ask me to write them i wouldn't be able to really. Its all superficial, i read these things for fun but i never really accomplished anything.
And i know this is all in my head, that as soon as i find anything its probably gonna be fine, i just wish i had the enthusiasm and drive that people around me seem to have, instead of acting like a little bitch :)8 -
I think the reason I hate the terms "programming" and "program" (the verb) is because it's so commonly misused. Also I found people to less think of me as an hacker when saying that I am a coder rather than "I am a programmer".5
-
So a non programmer friend of mine needed an in house time tracking tool and found one on codecanyon. He bought it for 40$ and asked me if I could provide him some Webspace to host it until they deploy it in house. I said yes and took a look at the code as some stuff wasn't really working. All I can say is "wtf is that pile of crap". Nothing works, it looks like it's written by a first grader and it's UI looks like it was assembled by a chimp (well actually I think chimpanzees could make a better UI). Now I am interested the progress of rewriting that tool for him and I am almost done with all functions that thing should have and even more after 6 hours. I wonder if all stuff on codecanyon has the same quality and if, I am considering this as bonus income...5
-
Going through the typical phase of being depressed because of feeling underdeveloped skill wise and ignorant knowledge wise; despite how much I learn. God, spent 3 days on a recursive dynamic programming problem and couldn't implement it right... then I decided to glance at someones solution on github and turns out he did what I couldn't do in 70+ lines of code in 20. Sigh, just want to right concise and clear code and become a better programmer all together, but that obviously takes time. For the mean time I am feeling quite defeated.9
-
A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says, “Can’t you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!”
To which the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.”3 -
I had this a while ago. Started a new project at my study (Application Development) and started working on the documentation. After rewriting parts of the documents for nine weeks (10 weeks for every project where I study) because they were not approved by my teacher because they didn't fit her 'personal preference/style', she even had the guts to tell me that I am a bad programmer because the application was even less than half complete. She only gave me one week to create the application that normally takes at least five weeks.5
-
I'm getting really tired of those dumbass programmers that do not understand shit and then come to me when production breaks. (I am also a programmer, not really a DevOps engineer, but I'm the least worst at DevOps stuff, so it's my job...).
We're programming some kind of document management tool. Today we had a release, and one of the new features is to download all of your documents as a zip file, which is asynchronuously generated. When it's done, the user gets a mail with the download link to the zip file.
The feature works basically, but today it broke our production service, as somebody was running a test of it.
Turns out all the documents are loaded into memory to be zipped. So if you have 2 gigs of documents, a container with memory restrictions in that area will crash.
I asked the programmer who reported this «ops problem» to me, why he didn't just shit the files into a temp foler in order to zip them in there.
He told me that he wanted to do so, but did not know how to mock this for a unit test, and therefore went to the in-memory «solution», which was easier for him to mock.
For fuck's sake, unit tests and mocks are fucking tools, not ends in itself! I don't give a fuck about your pointless mocking code when the application crashes!
When I got to deal with such dumbasses, I'd prefer to mock those motherfuckers with a leaky bucket of liquid shit, which basically accomplishes the same task from my perspective: dripping shit all over the place and make everything suck as fuck.3 -
F**king sh*t management...there was a training schedule for Casandra (for basics and advance), I added my name to interested list and as I wanted my site ppl know I sent a email to HR stating to look at it and add more ppl....now I am out from the list and a line manager's name got added...WTF....why the hell he needs rather then a programmer... :(2
-
Well create a Googleing machine and infuse it with code words which it automatically searches till the Google AI thinks I am a ( ) programmer and gives me a job offer.this was my last night's dream . How Hard Can it Be?!!!
-
A failed programmer!
Back in school the computer screen was my canvas, the keyboard was my brush and i filled it in with the colors of a language. Helping my fellow students debug and find the solution to their codes. Loved to do that its been 10 years thats i have programmed anything I am trying to figure out where is lost it all. Never got into a job working as programmer as in all the interviews I was asked of definition of things I could never remember but give a something to build or debug I could work it as a charm. Even though didn’t work a programmer kept on programming at home making free programs for friends or helping debug codes. But then I stopped and don’t know why and I really wanna get back into it not for others but for myself to see if i still have it, but its been so long new languages new platform and don’t know where to start. Or should I accept myself as a failed programmer!12 -
!rant && Thanksgivings++
I am truly thankful to be a programmer for it is the only job on Earth where doing mistakes is the profession itself.
Think about it. We make more mistakes than other professions on DAILY basis. If a doctor miss a step during a diagnosis or an operation, a fucking human being might die. Engineers, lawyers, teachers you name it. They are not allowed to make mistakes.
Us? We are earning money from other people for all the hours we spent fixing the mistakes which we made in the first place.4 -
Lead: how long do you think it would take to fix the bug?
Programmer: 20 mins with a testing
**Lead an hour later**
Lead: I don't see PR for the fix
Programmer: the fix broke all the unit tests so I am fixing them now. -
I love to program — I discovered that about myself a few years ago. Beforehand, I only KNEW how to program. But then I discovered the power programming gives you to create things, and even help your surroundings. So now, I can surely say, that I love programming. Heck, I am even dating a very talented programmer.
But despite all the pleasure I derive from it, I feel lonely sometimes. True, there are millions of programmers all over the world. I also know I am not the only one who prefers coding over going to the movies, taking a walk, eating or sleeping.
Why do I feel this way?
My loneliness is a gendered loneliness, as there are not many women in my field. For sure, there are women who study computer science in high school or at the university, and some even work as programmers. But they are very, very few!
I often underestimate my abilities and feel intimated for no apparent reason
#random thoughts6 -
When I first started my current job, 2.5 years ago, I helped write the class that told the machine how to dispense and deposit money.
When the other programmer left, I decided to refactor that section. I wrote a new class that told the machine how to dispense and deposit money.
We are integrating new hardware that has a very different protocol of communication. I am making a library that will convert universal commands into vendor specific function calls. I am writing a new library that tells the machine how to dispense and deposit money.3 -
I can't pass a whiteboard interview to save my life. I did pretty well on a fizzbuzz whiteboard a few years ago but in reality in is fairly straightforward. I am interviewing right now and the more I practice and study I realize my teacher in college was right 25 years ago. I should never have become a programmer. I am a likable and fairly competent coder but I am completely overwhelmed and stressed.14
-
I want to say I would not have been the programmer I am now, if it hadn't been for all of my mentors in my past and current job who took a chance on me.
I am socially awkward, am nervous and stutter around new people, cannot sustain conversation, and as a consequence come out rather poorly in most kinds of interviews.
But there has been 3 mentors/leads in my life so far who saw through the nervous wreck I was in the few hours of the interview and took, what felt like to me, a gamble by hiring me. My current mentor even taught me everything I know on my job and has vastly shaped the programmer I am.
A humble thank you to all the amazing mentors out there, who inspire and enable the now green engineers, who will later be the mentors of the future generation!1 -
Fucking cant solve productivity problem. Since I was working as programmer, about 8-9 years experience, constant complaints about my productivity and some jobs even fired me for this. Only one job did not complain and I worked in it longest time but still I was worrying very often about my productivity. It is fucking annoying. Why others are productive and I am not. How the fuck to find biggest bottlenecks to know which to work on.
I know I am not knowing technology perfectly, and from time to time I get stuck and so I ask other people help, or somehow manage to find solution myself but it takes more time. But dont know if that is the biggest issue. Should I intecify my learning? I am regularly studying, and working with symfony about 2 years, so I think I should know enough to be productive even with those strugles from time to time. But maybe they are too often?
I have listened book "deep work" and basic thing I think from this is - to minimize disctractions and learn to focus very well. But to minimize like in this book, I should work alone in my room. And even then I would like each hour for few minutes to read some new or smth, which this book says is bad, but a lot of people do that and they somehow get away with it. Plus if I work alone in my room, my social skills might get worse, and we all need social skills, even programmers.
I so envy to others who know how to be productive. I would hate if the only thing to be more productive is to reduce quality of the code, make more bugs. THats fucking cheating system.20 -
It’s time for me to thank people who, through their work, defined me as a person.
Thank you Terry A. Davis. You completely obliterated my whole narrative of “being incapable because of mental state”. Your example is the reason I’m privileged enough to type this right now, you’re the reason I survived depression. You showed me how to overcome FOMO once and for all by just doing what I’m supposed to as good as I can. Fame will come. And indeed, it came.
You’re not the smartest programmer who ever lived. Only humans can be programmers. You’re a superhuman. You’re not the smartest programmer. You’re just the smartest.
May you rest in peace.
——
Thank you Richard Matthew Stallman. You showed me that the good which also can fight is a thing. You taught me to be afraid of nothing. You taught me how to be an immovable object, no matter the unstoppable force opposing. Because of you I can freely interact with people and my illness has no influence on who I am.
——
Thank you Håkon Wium Lie. You showed me that the ways of overcoming and suffering aren’t the only ones. You’re charming yet uncompromising, empowering yet never reckless. Since we met, in any troubling social interaction my brain automatically thinks “What would Håkon do?”, and somehow it’s always able to find a solution that doesn’t involve the cruelty that always dictated what I said and what I did.
You can already stop doing good things because you’re surely going to heaven with other golden retrievers but I know you’ll never stop. -
During Summer school (yeah I'm an idiot) I disabled this LanSchool Helper thing with a few lines of powershell script(fuck windows, havent used it since I was like 15) that allowed the teacher to see what the students were doing on their computers. Instead of finishing my failing courses I was then able to spend the rest of my time that Summer honing my programming skills.
I graduated a year late, but had easily become the best programmer that school district had ever seen 😎 And by impressing the kids sitting next to me while I browsed docs, blogs, stack overflow, and youtube - rose to be a Summer school legend.
I am a dev badass. I am legend. 😂11 -
I am a junior web developer, currently working in my first job for a small company, I was hired because I have an interest in meteor and modern web dev.
When I say small I mean I am the only full time js dev.
So the project we are working (my first ever professional project from start to finish) is a travel booking web app (being a little vague, for the sake of privacy). I am the lead developer, as a new programmer of a project that is far from trivial. There are no other javascript devs in office, no sort of code review. We have an outsourced dev but as I got in a flow with one dev my boss supposedly told him to do it part time (without discussing with me), but haven't heard anything from him, so assuming he's just disappeared (probably annoyed at being treated like a commodity).
Boss has set up the stages, and forces me to move on to the next stage before that stage has been finished. I will have to go back over the whole thing to finish things off.
He will only hire cheap juniors, one front end guy with barely any experience is styling the site.
He is used to churning out WordPress and Magento sites.
Wish I had a senior I could learn off.
I want to stick at this project and see it through, but i can only see it ending in a train wreck.
At the same time I want out, I want to work under a better team with senior programmers and better code review.
I just have to do my best and see how it goes I guess6 -
A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says, “Can’t you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!”
To which the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.”3 -
Two states of a developer every day:
• Fuck this job. I hate everyone and everything. My code sucks. It's not working. Why did I choose this career?! I am so miserable.
• It works! I'm a programmer god. Oh my goodness I'm smarter than everybody.4 -
Riddle me this
Client wants solution based on open source software.
Any additional software that I write (let's say, an offline store plugin for Feast feature store) to add missing functionality has to be closed source.
Fuck you. Intellectual property my ass. You and me wouldn't even have projects if it werent for OSS.
Good luck maintaining the plugin after I am gone.
I'm doing a lot of work and will have close to nothing to show to future employers.
(BTW, if it were for the old Microsoft model of code source, I would have never become a programmer of any sort. God bless OSS)3 -
A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. The man, sitting next to him becomes irritated with the smoke and says, “Can’t you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!”
To which the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.”4 -
So,
Yesterday was Google CodeJam's Kickstart event ( or something like that ).
Participated in competitive programming for the first time. It was kinda fun I guess...
Nope I still hate competitive programming. I like being a laid back programmer who develops in his own pace.
I know it's not what industry wants but I can't jst go for competitive programming.
On the positive note, I started using goto in C++ because of it and created a better Graph library than I had before 🤗🤗
P.S. I did read on how to use goto and when to not use it. I guess my usage was fine... Or better yet, IT WORKED 😜😂
Well, I am done as far as competitive programming goes... 😭😭 -
According to many of the rant posts, I am not a programmer.
I wake up 8 in the morning, eat breakfast at home and then get to the office at 9. Work till noon and then enough 1 hour lunch, back from lunch work till like 6-7 pm, have dinner at office then head to the gym workout for an hour to an hour and half and then head home, shower and sleep at 11:59 pm.7 -
Can a front end developer themselves a software engineer? I am really confused with these terms. Or a programmer? Or a computer scientist? I didn't go to a school, so I am not sure what are the differences..8
-
Hey DR! I am a pretty inexperienced programmer who's learning about JS. When I was writing vanilla JS to do some simple DOM manipulation, JS seems like a pretty familiar language. However, when I start to learn about different frameworks (React, Express), the way that they code stuff (IDK how to pinpoint specific examples, it's just an overall impression) becomes very different from my experience with other programming language. I am wondering if anyone have any suggestions, have felt the same way, or know how to overcome this phase.
ps This is a general question. Please don't be pissed for lack of technical detail....8 -
yeah I am a software engineer.
yea I am a programmer too.
yeah I am behind my laptop all the time..
but no I don't want to fix your computer.
I have no interest in changing your windows, installing antivirus on your pc and so on..
just understand it , God damn these shit people :( -
As of today, 12:11 CEST, my days as a student who hates school are over. In one month, i will be a programmer. Feels fucking great.
I may go back in the future, but not right now.
Also, in my new job i have to go to school to, but only 1/3 of the time, and i am getting paid for it.2 -
Today I feel I made it
So today was my second day in new job. I am very happy because it is great improvement in all imaginable areas from my previous one. I feel treated better, colleagues seem to be more mature and friendly, I finally work again in English- speaking environment and etc. etc. i could go on and on..I ranted here couple of times when things got rough and it helped. It is very important during those desperate moments to see other perspectives and this app helped me tremendously! If YOU are reading this now and you are going through s****y times - just hold on and don’t give up on yourself, if I made it - you can make it too!
P.S. it’s not like I am feeling like a best programmer in the world or I am paid a lot, but sometimes you get the feeling that you are in a right place and right time, doing right things.3 -
Damn life.
Life is very hard.
Social relationships are very difficult.
I am so lonely.
Not friendship.
Not a girlfriend.
All I have is my laptop.
My only companion is a laptop.
The only person sitting on my feet is my laptop.
Well, I'm a programmer, so what?
What kind of person am I?
What is the purpose of my creation?14 -
The feeling of never being good.
Even thou I am a new programmer, everyone I meet tell me the same stuff. "You will almost never feel good at something". And yes, I never do, even with things I'm fairly good at I still think I haven't grasped it yet. Always new sites and resources to check out, always new things to dig into.
Althou it is what defines us as programmers. To being able to learn and adapt. To explore and being curious, to learn and to advance.2 -
!rant
How to earn a lot of money as a programmer?
So this question might sound a little naive and too simple, but earning a lot of money is what we all want after all right? Collecting experiences from people in the business should be a good idea.
So this is the position I am in:
I am a German student in my 13th year of school (which means I will graduate this summer) and I am very interested in information technology. I know C++ pretty well by now and I have built a rendering engine for a game I want to make using openGL already, which I am very proud of.
I would love to turn this passion into my profession and thats why I plan to attend a dual course of computer science next year (dual means that I will be employed at a company (or similar) in parallel to the studying course).
But what direction should I be going in if I want to make big money later on? I am ready to spend a lot of time and work on this life project but I don't know which directions are the most promising. I hate being a tiny gear in a huge machine that just has to keep spinning to keep the machine alive, I want to be part of a real project (like most people probably) and possibly sell a product (because I think that is how you really make money).
Now I know there is no magic answer to this, but I bet many people here have made experiences they can share and this could help a lot of people directing their path in a more success oriented way.
I personally am especially interested in fields which are relatively low-level and close to memory (C++), go hand in hand with physics and 3D simulation and are somewhat creative and allow new solutions. (These are no hard lines, I just thought I should give a little direction to what I know already and what I am interested in)
But really, I am interested in any work you are likely to earn a lot of money with.12 -
Is it only me that I feel I am so special for being a programmer, and also able to think, learn, and analyze better than other people?
I feel like we are small group of people that do magical things that change the world while nobody even realizes or appreciates what we do4 -
My girlfriend comes in and sees me on devrant.
GF: "What is that app? I see you using it all the time. Is it like an endless blog with updates?"
Me: "It's kinda like facebook. But for developers. And you don't have any friends".
GF: "That seems like a sad app"
Credit: i am programmer, i have no life (fb page )7 -
I am a good person. I can even say I am a good programmer. I have worked hard to get where I am and that shows perseverance. Although, where I am right now is not what I expected, I am somewhere. I can do something. I have good intentions.
Someday, I will build software which will be used by millions of people around the interwebs. And they will love me, for I will have made their lives better....in some way. Some will even consider paying me for it. Not because the well placed and non intrusive donate button I put there, but out of pure adoration and bare necessity to preserve someone as brilliant and precious as me. I shall be the definition of success. But I long for neither adoration nor wealth, for I am humble or at least that is how I will be perceived.
Like flies to the honey my success will attract big evil corporations to acquire my business. And I shall spit on their wretched face....at first. I would like to be wooed. Such display of integrity shall inspire generations of programmers. Let ye be inspired. There will be those who envy my achievements and they will be mocked and shunned by my true believers. But being the kind soul that I am, I will bring back my minions, for it could a PR nightmare.
All these events will take place in a not too distant future. Sure, I am going through a dark time now, it will pass. 'tis nothing but me transitioning from a lame ass PHP coder moth to this totally badass software engineer who is also a cool bro. This eclipse of my brain shall pass. My neurons will fire in all directions like photons from the sun during late winter, for it may overheat and we definitely don't want that.
I pray to the gods of engineering to grant my wishes. Trust me guys, you will be thanking yourselves when donate my money to charities that will help me set up. But that's another scheme. Amen.4 -
I would consider myself in the topper half of c++. I build compilers, i contributed 1000 linus to the linux kernel... But still: I am (only) 14 and lack experience... Could you please share some tipps for a young programmer... Not only for jobs, but also to improve more...10
-
Wk19 is the week I become a real programmer because of you guys ...
Shameless bastards , I am one of you now -
I really don't want to do adult shit tomorrow. I really hate mondays. Shit is slow af in the office since everyone is on meh mode.
Not only that but tomorrow I have to go on an 1 hour drive to the other campus (I work at a college) to ensure that one of our products is good to go (its not, but it aint my fault or the lead developer, shit is from a different era and the programmer that made it was beyond crappy...we have not been given time to update) and just.....just no ok?
I sometimes hate being an adult. Sure, its got some perks....the only thing that comes to mind is sex right now but I am sure there are more.
Just.....ok? -
My first time doing a pair-programming for uni assignment.
My partner is actually smart (a Mechanical Engineering guy), except when it comes to programming :
1. Don't know how to spell FALSE
2. Don't know how to create array in Matlab
3. Poor variable naming
4. Redundant code everywhere
5. Not using tabs
6. Stealing my idea and spit it again in my face after claiming it as his idea
7. Mansplaining every line of his code like I am a stupid person who never sees a computer before.
He said he has an experience in Matlab, wants to specialize in Robotics and taking several ML classes. What did they teach anyway in class to produce a shitty programmer like him?
Thankfully despite his being an arrogant shitty guy, he still manage to get our code to works.
That's good because if not, then I will happily push his head under water while slowly watching him drown.
🤨6 -
Anyone else out there feel useless as a programmer? By that I mean you have always struggled to solve problems quickly and effectively. Or to fully understand the language and typical patterns and algorithms. Or to retain in memory all the things you need to “just know” on a daily basis to avoid having to look them up regularly and look foolish or incompetent? It seems I can’t keep my mind focused on learning, whether by tutorials or hands-on practice. I should probably just switch careers, but I’m so close to retirement that it seems stupid to attempt such a thing. Am I alone?12
-
I had just finished programmer school (Air Force Tech School), and was all set to wade into the world of C++ programming. Got to my first job, and they set my down at a VT220 terminal on a VAX 11/780 and said, "You are the new sys admin." Talk about disappointment. My first actual coding? I got to apply a software patch to a Gould SEL 67 that only had a Mod 40 TTY as an interface ... yes, pretty much a typewriter ... no terminal screen. I am so happy technology has advanced as much as it has.
-
Hello everyone.
So, i am thinking about where to get lists of programming languages, frameworks and softwares that is fundamental. For example:
If i would like to develop a web site. I would use html, css, js & php. Maybe a site or frameworks for reference and 'roadmap'. I want to become a good programmer.6 -
So I am young 14 year old programmer that just started high school yesterday. What are some good things to try and do for a future job? Should I stop coding until hs is over, do I code casually with free time and then after High-school I will know a lot more? Not sure how it all works15
-
Just curious on an opinion from other Devs who don't actually work as a programmer...
Would you want to?
I currently work in retail and have a dream job as a genetic engineer majoring in dormant diseases (eg cancers) and personally would never take a job where I will be programming, never merge a hobby and a profession...
Am I alone in this one?4 -
For me it is not difficult to explain other people what I am doing as a programmer, but what company I am working for. We write software for the administration of cemeteries. People often look at me like I am joking. So I was wondering: What was your weirdest project/Job as a developer?1
-
Him: i get this error when i insert into table, ForeignKey_contraint failed, what can i do?
Me: you have to obey the constraint, make sure it exists in the other table first
Him: ok i did that but i still get ForeignKey constraint error
Me: yeah that table has a couple foreign keys
Him: could you give me a very specific example how to insert into this table
Me: ........ here is a command to remove constraints on the table
Him: thanks, that fixed it!
I am helping a programmer who works with Costco integrate to software my company sells. I don't have source code, just an understanding of the database and what the software does. If he is getting paid more than me, then I should get a job there and ask for double, I could easily work 10 times faster than this buffoon. -
Ok. I am trying out a new thing. My colleague told me about a technique worth giving a shot. So basically you should ignore the negative things and only focus on the positive ones making your mind shift states and boost your productivity although sometimes really hard. It’s working for me quite well so far, so here’s my two cents on today:
Thank you my dear designer fellow to making all the screens more beautiful than they were already. Big respect for you for not worrying about deadlines and for for inspiring me to be a faster programmer. I knew I can count on you. Being such nice to me leaves me speechless sometimes, but not today. Today I wish you soon get all the anusroses to smell right next to your beautiful face1 -
tldr: my classmates suck and I hate them
We study cs in school, and my classmates are super dumb.
Here is an example from today:
The task: build an http server in python, using sockets.
My classmates: writes everything in the main function, uses try-expect for everything and every error possible, nothing works, nothing worked after a week.
Me: properly separated to different functions, used goddam regrx to get data from requests, used asyncio to make sure it can handle multiple requests at the same time, everything worked after 2 hours.
But, and here is the problem, after I finish they ask me a bunch of dumb, 'Just Google it dude' questions and they call me condescending because I get mad after the second hour of teaching them the same thing.
Once they told me:"you think you are a better programmer then us" and I just want to say this out loud: I AM A BETTER PROGRAMMER THEN THEM, THEY ARE THE PERFECT EXAMPLE OF HOW YOU SHOULDN'T DO ANYTHING AND I HATE THEM.
That's it, I'm done. I feel much better now.
PS: it's okay to suck at programming, but please stop thinking that everyone who's better than you is condescending.4 -
Damn I am becoming so skinny!!!
Like stress, sleep deprivation for months, lack of proper feeding.
I am sacrificing much for being a programmer.
Jeez, I never taught I am gonna be looking like the average "stereotypical skinny programmer".
I don't need a break but need my body back in shape.
Yeah - another narcissistic rant5 -
Since ive started college my will to program has become non-existant. Im a self taught programmer since 12, it used to be MY thing and i loved it. I used to spend hours a day just programming personal projects because i love it. However since college has been getting serious with this being my junior year and having part-time contract work i dont "love it" as much. Im a little scared, i have no time to just code for fun and when i do have time it feels like work because thats the only other time i code.
What should i do guys, i dont want to fall out of love with programming, it's part of who i am and i can feel im losing it.1 -
No Rant:
I guess I will start a religous discussion with it but I want your opinion on what tool I should learn.
Vim or Emacs (or stay with my IDE)?
For all of my programmer life I used IDEs... From Eclipse over CodeBlocks over VS to IntelliJ.
But now I realized that I want to be one of the cool kids. And using plain IntelliJ is uncool. No matter how much I love this tool.
So now I want to invest some time into learning. I never managed to do much in Vim since all code-completions sucked ass, feedback on syntax errors was bad and I never saw how I could be any faster with that shit compared to what IntelliJ does for me.
Will Emacs solve all those problems? Will Emacs make me code 1000 times faster and make having a mouse useless?
Or am I just too dumb for Vim? Can Vim itself do what my IDE does for me? Will it make me look as cool as I want to be?
Or should I stick to IntelliJ and just install Vim bindings?
What is your opinion on Vim vs Emacs vs any IDE?8 -
I am all burned out on everything having to do with websites. I need a new career path. I’ve never been a stellar programmer. I have no idea what to switch to that I could be good at and that comes with a paycheck and benefits to provide for a family of six. Feeling painted into a corner with no way out.4
-
Hi there fellow Devranters,
I am new here but my problem is pretty old. You see i stumbled into coding totally by accident. That was about 5 years ago. I have been learning ever since.
But the problem is that each day I just feel less and less of a programmer, more of a failure. I started with python, from sololearn to various ebooks.Then C++ and finally Ruby. But I still feeal weak.Despite the projects that I have worked on I still don't feel good enough. Most especially in Ruby.
I have a friend who is also into coding and coincidentally started about the same time as I did.The difference is that he learnt at university and I am self-taught.We used to talk a lot but we don't anymore,I feel too ashamed, an impostor even. I am scared he'll ask me something and I won't know anything about it.And I once taigjt him OOP. Right now I can't even code a hello world program without reading a whole ebook on python just to be confident.
We had dreams with my friend on a dozen or so projects that would have put us on the software dev map, but I keep avoiding him so much we have barely started any. I am afraid he'll find me too amateurish to work with.
I learn everyday to expand my knowledge,I have subscribed to a gazillion software related stuff on all social media platforms I happen to be in.But deep down I feel insufficient. I have been going through rants since the few hours I joined and it doesn't sound gibberish to me.Neither does other people's code when I go through it.But I am ashamed of mine I end up deleted after it runs successfully.
I just don't feel like a software developer, I don't even know what it takes to be one even. I learned 10 languages focused on 3, laughed at memes only devs get, used linux and loved it too but still I feel like an impostor. I used to be happy about all the things I taught myself, I onced dreamed of working at Google and later having my own startup back home.Now my friend and a couple of his friends have a small start-up and I feel ashamed of myself.
I don't feel like what I know is enough and learning only makes me feel worse, so bad I am scared of coding again now.Yet I just can't stop learning, I feel incomplete when I don't do anything dev related,but I don't even feel my speed is fast enough when I type on my keyboard.
😥😥6 -
Wk33:
Best experience of 2016 is probably just realising I'm a pretty good programmer. I have a physics undergraduate degree and a 1 year masters in CS, I'm working on back end algorithm stuff so pretty mathsy at times, but I've found from working with others that I write good quality code. I've still got lots to learn but I've got a solid foundation, am reading, learning and coding outside of work.
Worst experience of 2016 is working with people for whom it's purely a day job, only about the money, get things done in whatever hacky way works.10 -
I know recursion is everywhere but I recently noticed it in very unusual place('unusual' in the way we see), I hail from India, we studied in our childhood about road less taken, the way I see, everyone has to take so important decisions in yheir life, one such decission is about career, in India road less taken in career paths is everything other than orthodox education, I too the dreaded road "Education", next decission is to choose stream and there the road less taken is anything other that "Engineering (or medicne) " and I took (*as expected) engineering, after taking computers (which is the dreaded road now) next decision is what next? Dreaded road is job, but this time I chose take a road little less traveled in CS. Then I next decission was to choose the research stream the road less taken here (NOW) is systems as AI is in its prime and everyone whants to ride the wave, but I chose Systems in research, after all these my point how how boolean function is called recursively (in the sense of construct) and as a systems programmer I realize the importance of optimizing how I answer these functions quick and accurate. This is one such boolean function but I am sure you can find many in our path till here so It is better to realize what these functions are optimize then as a good Programmer of your own Life.
-
I'm fairly new (less than a year) to programming and I'm just wondering what everyone's thoughts are about this.
Is taking college math courses necessary to be a good programmer?
I am learning online and I'm worried I won't be a great programmer without all the math. The last course I took was Trig :/
Also add any suggestions you have. Thanks all!26 -
By this month, I have been in business for three years. How much pressure have I suffered in three years? I am a programmer. I used to think that writing code is too youthful. I started to know that when I started a business, when a programmer might lose my hair, I would be bald if I started my own business.
In order to develop my own products, I invested most of the funds in the early stage. Later, when the product came online, I struggled with promotion, but promotion was not as easy as expected, especially when you had no money. Those successful people always like to share the story of "without spending a penny to promote and make one million users from zero." I have nothing more to say about this except Ha ha. I am very confident in my product, but if I have no money to promote it, it means that no one knows how good your product is. So I always wanted to get a financing. But if promotion is difficult, is financing easy? The chicken soup said again: "All the money floating on Zhongguancun Chuangye Street is money, and as long as you come, it is yours." Ha ha, I laughed and said nothing.3 -
I was wondering how many years will I get for killing muggles who approach me with ideas about the "Next Facebook Idea" after hearing I am a programmer?!
Would be possible to be freed of all charges?2 -
I AM ABOUT TO KICK SOME PROFESSORS ASSES!!!!!!!!!!
THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS ARE MAKING GO MAD BEYOND MY BOUNDS WITH THERE MOTHERFUCKING STUPIDITY AND SELF RIGHTEOUSNESS.
LISTEN YOU FUCKS I WORK AS A PROGRAMMER TO PAY FOR MY FUCKING TUITION. NO IT IS NOT A PART-TIME JOB. I FUCK UP MY SCHEDULE SO I CAN CAME HERE TO THIS SHIT LEARNING SOMETHING BECAUSE YOU FUCKERS DO NOT HAVE A LECTURE AFTER HOURS.
SO WE I SAID THAT I CAN ONLY CAME TO THIS CLASS AT THIS TIME AND DAY OF THE WEEK I AM NOT BULLSHITING YOU.
SO DO US A FAVOR AND STOP BEING SO FUCKING STUPID AND GIVING ME THAT CYNICAL SMILE YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
FUCK YOU FUCKER AND YOUR PIECE OF SHIT CLASS.2 -
Me: trying to do any simple fucking project
Me: cant figure out how to do something simple or cant figure out how to start or how something should work.
Me *Looks up problem* (everytime...)
results: SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT OF.
Am I just a shitty programmer, a shitty learner, or just not cut out for this? because I fucking Love this field. this is the only thing I ever want to do. BUT I CANT FIGURE ANYTHING OUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME EVEN WITH LANGUAGES IM GOOD AT!! WHICH IS JUST PYTHON AND IM STILL SHIT AT THAT.
I TRY TO DO PROJECTS WITH JS, OR C, OR PYTHON PICK WHICHEVER ONE. AND I NEVER KNOW HOW I SHOULD START IT, AND IF I LOOK UP HOW TO DO IT ITS SO MUCH LONGER AND COOLER AND BETTER THAN MY DUMBASS WOULD HAVE DONE (and longer in a good way because its well thought out and works)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET A REAL JOB IN THE FIELD IF I CANT MAKE THE RANDOM IDEAS THAT I SEE ON THE INTERNET AND WHY CANT I MAKE THEM AS GREAT OR LONG AND SHIT ON MY OWN. SO MANY PEOPLE CAN WRITE SO MANY LINES OF CODE AND FUNCTIONS AND ALL THIS SHIT THAT WORKS AND YEAH THEY LOOK UP SOME PROBLEMS BUT NOT HOW TO FUCKING DO THE ENTIRE THING LIKE SOME FUCKING RETARD
AWDJKBAKWJBDAOLK;JWDBOALBJKWODANLWIO;NIAWDN;PIAWLDJBAWIDHB
I CANT GO A PROJECT WITHOUT LOOKING UP HOW TO DO ANYTHING BECAUSE MY LITTLE BRAIN CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO IT18 -
The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air.
The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: "Can't you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"
The boy replies back: "Darling, I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."3 -
I am a hobby programmer, far away from finally turning my hobby into a profession BUT already they ask me to fix their FUCKING PRINTERS........ whooot da fuk?!?!3
-
Confession!!
Ohh Lord, Please forgive me. Today I committed a sin and tomorrow I will have to commit it again. I wrote a shitty code and will have to write it tomorrow also. I am so ashamed of myself. I promise, I will refactor the code before releasing it for code review. My excuse for doing the sin is that I want to make it work first, it is little complex. I hope, if someone will stumble on it, then that person will not judge me by few shitty snippets I wrote to make it work.
Thanks,
An embarrassed programmer3 -
Today, my manager received a brand new Macbook pro with all its cool features while I am still stuck using an old Macbook pro (mid 2012 model). I always complained him about performance issues and all he did was to approve an OS upgrade (to Sierra). How does that even enable me to be productive? I am already running applications at the peak of the machine limits. Sometimes, the JVM crashes and other time Node.js runs out of heap space.
The manager is not a programmer. All he really does is attend online meetings, track and report to management, and write emails. Ideally, he would need a Mac Air or perhaps a Windows machine. I still wonder how did the company management allowed this. He is simply misusing his privileges as a manager and I can do nothing about it.1 -
I've always thought that in order to become a project manager it was necessary a period as programmer (as it was a sort of promotion).
But according to what I read here it seems like a lot of pm have no idea how to/how long it takes to develop software... Am I wrong or what?3 -
So I've mentioned before that I'm pretty much the sole programmer for my robotics team. I'm on vacation for a week, and the other programmer has to take over.
Is it normal that, since I made the code work and wrote it almost all myself, I am fearful that she's gonna fuck it all up? I kind of want her to work on it slowly so I don't worry too much...3 -
I am currently a CS major, studying in a toxic university that teaches no more than old-school stuff.
I know HTML, CSS, and JS (self-taught), and at present, I am spending time on React.js.
I'm also a competitive programmer.
I badly wanna move out of this toxic educational environment and wanna do something that's worth spending time on.
I am feeling like I am just wasting both my time and money in this old-school university.
what should I do? help me out?
I am thinking that once I am fluent enough with HTML, CSS, JS, React, and some database stuff, I must start finding jobs in small startups.
badly need some guidance. PLEASE HELP ME...24 -
http://www.phpthewrongway.com
I am not a php dev but I really like the following statement:
In the software industry you can compare a pre-built house to a general purpose framework. Building software using general purpose frameworks doesn’t make you a coder or a programmer any more than putting together a pre-built house makes you a carpenter.14 -
Hello everyone !
I am a self taught programmer. Currently in last semester in electronics engineering. I want to become a software developer but can't decide the right career path for me to take. I like back end, Android, Data structures and algorithm, Parallel programming, Machine learning and computer vision, and even security. I am afraid I will remain the jack off all trades and won't be the master of any. This way I won't be doing any good in my career. Any advice as what to do ?7 -
Got a high paying job, with great benefits, and a big name, straight out of college. I was hired as a software engineer. Comfy, relaxed, and flexible.
The problem comes where it was not the job I was expecting. It has been almost a year and the only programming I've done has been 1 small copy pasta project. I am worried because I am bored and feeling my coding skills fade away. I'm still a novice programmer and feel like this impacts future career opportunities not learning useful skills for outside of this company. I'm going to grad school to do what I really want but still have the 2 years.
Do I stay or do I make the stressful change again? Other fun thing is I just relocated a distance to an area with not a lot of opportunities so would likely involve relocating again.1 -
I don’t know what I am ? Analyst ? Programmer? Engineer? Consultant? I seem to be doing a shit load of non programming stuff1
-
At work I am "the" programmer and is the first time in which I actually enjoy showing different solutions to problems without having a fear of implementing large things without having any form of recognition.
Seeing someone get happy because of something you created is a great feeling and even tho most of us are misantrophic af we can still appreciate bringing happiness through code.
To me, software engineering is the closest thing to magic and I really believe that.
Two days ago I showed my manager a little utility to build small portions of the site we are building and make changes to it in real time without browser refreshes for whatever change she would like to do. She was super happy and excited and it made me feel real happy.
Such great feeling man. Nothing but good vibes brother!! -
I came from a procedural background, then adopted object-oriented programming, and now I am very enthusiastic about functional programming. Is this kind of an evolutionary path as a programmer? Or am I just late to the party?
And what paradigm follows?5 -
So I saw a blurb about AlphaCode from DeepMind. I went to look at their website:
https://alphacode.deepmind.com/
What I see is the most insanely detailed spec for code I have ever seen in my life. I haven't even seen college programming problems this detailed before. Most specs "I" get are like one or two sentences long "if" it is even written down. A lot of the time the direction is: write some stuff and we will tell you what we hate. Just figure it out.
So DeepMind is claiming they can produce code as well as the average programmer because they ranked 54% in a coding competition. What a complete misleading claim and absolute bullshit conclusion. I am all for creating new tech around generating code, but this is just to sell snake oil to an idiot manager at a startup.
This is going to lead to some really fucked up rants here at devrant.6 -
Calling any Python programmer here (especially package maintainers)
I run Gentoo, so am responsible for maintaining the dependency tree (to a degree). When it comes to Python I have 2.7, 3.4, 3.5, 3.6 available. I'm always running into some package needing one version or another, and I can't just set a single version and forget it (which is fine. I'm running Gentoo).
I know that this is because python changes rapidly and so different libraries need different versions. Fine.
Why does this happen with Python and not C++, JavaScript, php, ruby, or any other languages on my system? I don't have 3 different versions installed to cover any other languages, and I don't spend time adding installation rules to cover them.
Why does Python need to be a pain in the ass about it?3 -
I like devrant!!
I put a link on every programmer oriented facebook group i am in!!
Hopefully some new italian ranter will join the party!5 -
what am i going to do today? whatever the fuck the SYSTEM throws at me... or what my manager wants me to waste time on... ah , programmer life when one has a conundrum of doing what you like to do but not end up doing that because there are other mountains to climb with squirrels eating your nuts...1
-
How did you learn to think "like a programmer"?
I am starting to learn C++ and I am trying it out on exercism. I am really at the beggining but when I make it work after so much frustration(based on devrant posts I guess that's part of the job) I always see people having shorter/better/more effective codes which makes sense to me but I wouldn't thought of it that way.
Is there way to make such thinking better or does it simply come with practice ?6 -
I'm living a daily drama with my own head lately. I was hired like two and a half months ago as a junior programmer and it is my first real job, in addition to 2 internships (the last one was in the advertising agency, and after a month I started to search a new job and warned my boss that I wanted to quit, because it was kind of a painful job and I was not happy at all because I was not working with programming).
The thing is that I do not know what they expected from me in this current job, and I still can not say. Am I being enough? Am I a disappointment? Everyone there is so experienced and good at what they do, and I was just used to being "the guy" where I studied that it was some sort of shock when I realized that I had to get way better even for a junior job. I do not feel productive as I wanted and sometimes I feel like I'm a total disaster and I'm not made to work with the only thing I could say "I'm made for this".
I might be overreacting this, but I just wanted to say this somewhere and I'm thankful I have devRant now. I could talk to my superiors or my boss about this, but I'm so used to get there and focus on my tasks that I'm always forgetting.3 -
once upon a time, i get interviewed by a software vendor. i am applied for system analyst because i think i have to level up from previous works as programmer, then i passed the test. after that i get interviewed for the second times and they told me i could start to work immediately. at first day i did programmer tasks instead of analyzing systems flow. i thought it just for exercises more my analytical skill through programming. i did it for 4 months until they add new employees, some of them are system analyst and they are fresh graduated. we chat and ask them about their experiences and they told me they are not programmers or system analyst before and no test!. i dig the info more deep, and i found they could get the job because they are graduated from bonafide university. until i resign i still a programmer and i hate to work at software vendor anymore because their corporate clients are all suck.
-
Hello devs!
Please help a fellow dev make a big career decision.
I am a person who is fascinated about AI.
So after working as a gameplay programmer, I have decided to switch my role as a R&D engineer in the same company. I will get to work on cool stuff in the ML and AI domain. But I have got this another job offer for a full stack developer role and the salary is supposed to be three times of my current package. It's great company but the only thing is that they do not have ML and AI in their tech stack. It has been only a year since I graduated, So I wanted to know what would be a good path. To follow what you like or to follow general software development with a great salary hike (which I am sure it would take many years to reach that amount in my current company). Also there are very few companies that offer such a good pay. I want to know that if I go with the salary option, Would it be possible for me to get into the AI domain at a later stage? I would appreciate if you share your experience as well.14 -
None of my friends have interest in learning programming. But I have desire to become a programmer.
I am daily spending 2+ hours other than my work time in doing online courses. But I will feel good if there is anyone to talk and discuss the concepts that I learned.
I am talking and thinking in programming terms like ( Data structure , algorithm) within myself...
Guide me guys... !!!7 -
Just got hired as a programmer. Still currently moving to the new city. I got a freshly installed windows PC to work with. Didnt finish some stuff on friday have to finish it today (monday) until 12 a.m. had to wake up at 4 am to get to the train so I could be at work on time (10 am). I arrived at work and turned the PC on, and now im sitting here and wait for Windows Update to finish. Its at 8% after 20 minutes.
(I actually like windows but) Man this sucks.3 -
When I have started working as engineer, coworkers addressed to me as a programmer or software developer. It was irritating since I am an electrical engineering and those days I didn't have much respect for computer science. Nowadays I know how hard is this field, since I have to define and code my soft, and I am proud if someone call me software developer or programmer
-
Oof, I think I figured out why I'm frustrated with work stuff (not the actual work, just processes that surround it).
Project manager is an ESTJ and I'm INTJ. Our communication styles clash. Too much asinine processes to "make things efficient."
They need too much detail and don't understand what I am saying, I get annoyed with being bossed to the point of providing what I consider irrelevant, excessive details in a technical manner that they don't understand, because they're not a programmer, but insist on being provided these details. I know I just confuse people when I am forced to be as detailed as humanly possible. I don my best to summarise an issue in enough detail to help someone understand.
I've done some googling and saw some posts on Quora and reddit about people having similar issues, so it must be a thing?
It's so tiring. I don't know what to do. We've done MBTI workshops at work, because the company I work for sells MBTI assessments, but we've never gone in depth, and I've asked my manager if we can.4 -
Is there any other programmer that started as an architect (building architect, not IT)?
I'm divided between two different careers and working around 15hours a day because I can't focus on one. Is this a normal thing?
I work as an architect for the past 6 years and were always interested in the technology part of it.
Soon I got to be a BIM coordinator and started using Dynamo for Revit.
After that, I got involved in learning Python and now start studying web dev (front-end)
Programming is very addictive! I get it now why IT people stay in their dorm like it's a cave
In architecture there's always a client you need to make happy, while in programming I create things the away I want them to be, without all the boring formalities that I am used to.
I can learn it for free and there's a huge community to help on it. All careers should be like this.
I'm happy, but really tired 😪 my social life is resumed to hanging out with my dogs5 -
Are any of you guys Linux gamers? I'm a gamer and a programmer on windows and I definitely wish that I had Linux and am considering switching. What are your guys' experiences with it?18
-
I am stuck in the loop of "Projects which can complete easily and effectively by programming alone, but some programme it with the team , ad we just wasted 3 months."
Because of Constantly Changing things and refactoring.... (different programmer, different methods of coding style , and it took me to understand sometimes.)
there are people who re use a method/function by copy paste multiple times instead of create one class and call the obj from it...3 -
Well I'm new to MacBook and it's OS, for like 1.5 months now, got pretty much hands on it to have my command over it. And as of now i am loving it ( since i came from Windows) judge me for it if you want to..🙄
Can you guys suggest some **MUST HAVE** tools/ programs/ apps, related or non-related to a programmer to make life easy on OSX?7 -
My color combinations sprint be like:
23* - current best
36
81
111
170 ...
Either i am a typical programmer or way too choosy!!! -
So I am finishing school this year and I want to study computer science after that. They keep telling us at information events that a salary of 90.000+ €/year is quite usual for a good programmer...
I'm just wondering if it is really true or are they just talking bullshit? Does anyone have some experience or information for me? :)9 -
I'm a Python programmer and I've been asked to build API's using Nodejs. It's been dofficult to even get the API running. Any advice on how to start? I am familiar with JavaScript7
-
Im a student programmer pretending to know his shit and earlier today I was coding javascript and man I thought I know that language already. Turns out I dont know shit and it had me searching how tos on google. Bless that search engine though for giving me results I didnt even know that I need. Lesson of the day, just continue pretending shit cause ya gotta live life.
PS sorry for those passionate about programming, I am not worthy.
PPS I actually believe I can do better I am just a lazy ass piece of shit who's still contemplating whether I should be really all doing this shit
PPSS I need motivation help9 -
I know how to code. I am good at coding, algorithms, datastructures. I have also been using linux since 4 years.
But still I am not a programmer. I work on excel in office.1 -
I think I am really passionate bout programming and want to build something innovative but I need a fellow programmer to do it with. I am ready to put any kinda work in!1
-
When you realize you were born when it was 4:04 AM on the clock...
I think I was born to be a programmer... Or maybe not? Am I an error?6 -
Hey I recently started working and had a few questions regarding fulfillment and sideprojects.
Although I am a game programmer now, the game we are making is not at all something I find interesting. I find myself wanting to work on some side Projects at home but its difficult to manage my time (obviously) and I cant really relax.
I do enjoy the work making the game, like, I like making the systems, I enjoy programming it, but I dislike the gameplay and the games thematics, so its a mixed bag.
I only worked there for 2 months and the game takes at least all of next year to be made. I dont want to quit, because its my first job and all and it would be stupid I dont really habe a reason to quit.
I guess I just want to hear how others are handling a situation like this2 -
I'm a Ruby on Rails developer. I love Rails because you can get so much done so quickly. I've built huge websites on Rails at the consultant shop where I work.
A couple of years ago we added a frontend guy to the team. We switched from doing full stack Rails to using Rails for API only with Vue with Typescript as the frontend. Since this transition took place, I am unable to get anything done on frontend. It takes a huge amount of effort to just add a new input box to a page. Our whole team is on the edge of getting laid off because we can't get things done in a timely fashion for clients and our products consistently run over time and over budget.
Here I'm trying to add an "Are you sure you want to delete this?" message to a form, and I'm on third hour trying to make Typescript happy. I want to assign a variable a value and I have to decipher errors like this "Type 'Ref<string>' is missing the following properties from type 'Vue<string, Record<string, any>, never, never, (event: string, ...args: any[]) => Vue<Record<string, any>, Record<string, any>, never, never, ...>>': $data, $props, $parent, $root, and 30 more." WTF?!?!
Am I just not smart enough for this? Why did programming suddenly become so hard for me? If I had to start off this way I wouldn't be a programmer because I wouldn't have been able to figure this out alone and it wouldn't have been any fun. Anyone else have the HATE for Typescript that I do?12 -
I retract my previous questions because I’m poor/am to lazy to buy the CNC shield I need for the Raspberry Pi (100$WtF)
I need ideas or something to do as a beginner c++ programmer I don’t know much but if it is difficult I would love to hear it4 -
Can I list this experience? Will it look bad?
I am an entry level programmer in a software shop, or whatever they are called. I was given no mentorship on the task I have done. Not even proper documentation and it seems management is passing me around. What I mean by that is that the task I work on no one has ideas about since it seems the last guy who was responsible left. He was a senior though and it seems that I might have been too eager to find a job. Now I am being tasked for things a senior would do but I have the entry pay and knowledge and skill set. 2 months experience...
I am going to design a whole system from scratch and they have not read anything on it. From networking to applications to fees to compliance requirements. Oh the great part is they want it soon, no pressure, but we have to start certification within a tight deadline. This is a great opportunity and maybe a dumpster fire waiting to start. I will gain so much real experience but they are taking a great risk. It seems that is throughout their code and infrastructure though.
I plan to leave after the project. I also will document and hopefully they start reviewing my stuff to catch my incompetence. Not on purpose but from pressure and inexperience, which I hate cause I was excited at first.
I plan to stick the year or until Covid strips work-from-home, cause they are bit “old school”. I will begin my job search as well. I just know I will burn out long term and the money and package is shit.
Do I list them if I leave earlier but finish the project?8 -
I had two mentors that changed my life.
The first one I worked with him for 1 year and half. He made me a better programmer, and increased my knowledge in backend.
The second one I was only able to learn from him for about 3 months, but he expand my knowledge and I was able to learn new languages.
Now I am on my own, but would be happy to work for them again! -
When a programmer gets a hangover
"I am going to get a new shirt()"
"That shirt is #ffffff"
"Do remember to #include<studio.h> this item in your to-do list" -
me: builds a python-script to transport data in .json-format into a config-file written in .xml for a coworker
my boss: "I am glad you have earned yourself a reputation as the 'programmer' in our team" -
I wad looking for a kind of 'internship', i'm an 18y/o high school self-taught programmer, and applied for a job at a small company in my town, with a mention: "I don't wanna be paid, I want just to evolve my skills, by gaining experience". When they called me, the HR girl told me exactly this: "If you can gain 2 years of experience until next month, we will hire you". My face expression changed to a poker one and I asked "How am I supposed to spend 2 years in 2 weeks?" and she responded: "I don't know, I told you what they told me to tell you"... Anyone else who got into a situation like this? How is this even possible?8
-
I'm sitting here in the dark and can't program because no electricians are available... Right before a deadline...
I worked on refactoring my code for our University lab's project (I am the programmer assigned to it) for almost a week and managed to refactor most of my old and unorganized code. Today I finally had the chance to finish the job.
While everything was open I decided to charge my laptop (I work on a desktop) and the moment I plugged it in the room turned dark. I realized I just have to turn the fuse back on but of course all the fuses are on already. Appearantly that short-circuit fried my home's electrical framework somehow and because it's a weekend I can't get in touch with any electricians.
All my code was committed but not pushed so now I am stuck here before a deadline with no way to work...
tl;dr Because of a short-circuit I don't have any electricity and all my work is unpushed.3 -
That moment when you fcked up in a technical interview and realize oh I need to sharpen my skills, I need to improve my skills! I am not a worthy programmer now 💔
Then you go to work next day and have a busy day working as a project manager!
Now I know why my skills got rusty, and am not able to code as I used to be 😭😭😢2 -
#bonfiretalk
Why did you want to become a programmer? Spending alot of my Teenage years on online games I always had a fascination for those 1337 haxxors that just appeared, did some awesome neverseen stuff and sometimes suddenly disappeared, never came back and became urban legends ("I heard h4xor1337 got caught by the FBI"..."I heard he was a CIA Hacker".."He was from Russia").. I started universe, picked some C/C++ Tutorials and 3 years later I am a freelancing Android developer . Today I am Downloading the source code of that old mmorpg (which is still played by alot of people , especially in the private Server scene) to practice my C++ -
I'm about to start as junior programmer. I'm taking a course which includes Scrum, where the teacher said '99.9 % of IT uses agile'.
That can't be right, right?!?
Or am I just being pessimistic? Can I get some estimates from the pro world, i.e. you?9 -
hey guys i need advise.
I currently got a job that i love with a lot of freedom. but the payment is not good and i am concerned that the company won't be there in the next 5 to 10 years.
I am a 25 years old, self taught programmer and my current employer is the only one I ever worked for. Recently I browsed xing and found a company which searches an employee with exactly my skillset (they need someone for a specific ERP system in which I am damn good at). The company is half an our away - my current job 20 minutes away. Also I think because the person they are looking for is rare because you need technical knowledge of windows and doors and you need to know how to administrate this erp system plus knowing some programming stuff.
There is also a very big company 10 minutes (walking) from home where I could apply. I think at this company i would start lower but could maybe study and working for them with higher expectations in long term (just google Hettich in germany here in the village this is big)
The problem I currently have is the following. If the company I work for is closing in lets say ten years, then I am 35 without a degree. I have a girlfriend - want to marry her and getting a child.
I have holiday now and i will apply for both companies. I feel very uncomfortable doing this because the company I work for is the company of my granddad. I don't have the balls to tell him that even if i get a raise that does not solve the 35 years issue.
Well, first of all I will just apply. Lets see how much value I have.
But I thought that asking you all may give me some other input to take into account. What are your thoughts on this?
PS: just a formal "sorry for my english" and thanks for reading6 -
What kind of apartment could a typical programmer afford in New York?
I am from Europe and don't consider moving to the US. I am just curious31 -
Today i got so fucking depressed and discouraged because whenever i tell people "i am a software engineer" or "programmer" especially fking girls they just fuckin leave. They dump you. Imagine seeing someone with both ur eyes, both of ur shits seeing someone go from high interest and then watch their interest drop
D
E
E
P
D
O
W
N
L
I
K
E
F
U
C
K
I
N
G
T
H
I
S
All the fckin way back to 0 if not even below that.... How the fuck am i fuvjin g supposed to fking feel. What am i supposed to think. This is such a fucking bullshit. I am fking wordless.
Hhhhhhhhh
Each time this shit happens i question myself if i should regret wanting to be a software developer or not6 -
Are here Vim users using the dvorak layout?
I am thinking of learning (programmer) dvorak but I am way to comfortable with Vim. I think Vim itself would not even be my primary concern since one should not use HJKL anyway. But I also have these bindings for switching tmux panes, vim splits and windows in i3, etc .
I think Dvorak would be a great opportunity to finally learn touch typing but I fear that Vim is not compatible with it.
So what is your experience with these two? Does it work? Is it worth it?2 -
why do all erp solutions i know have a poor design?
one of you guys surely works for a company which sells erp solutions. as i am a user AND a programmer.
i just have to ask: do you have the feeling that your UI is bad?
and if - why is it like this?
i dont want to attack someone. just want to know the reason why all of the solutions i saw have bad UI or are just "user-unfriendly" (like you would say in german :D)1 -
Yesterday a longtime friend asked me if I finally become a programmer.
Is it really being a programmer looking for solutions on stackoverflow?1 -
I think the hardest part about being a programmer is to decide what to program in your free time (if you have any)
Am I right?
If not, what is the hardest part in your opinion?1 -
Hey,
I studied law first and got a retraining about Java from my company for 6 months (just very basic concepts about servers, databse,.. besides java). I really enjoy programming now and that is what I want to do. Do you guys think I need to study computer science to become a good programmer or to change my employer (payment here is really moderate ~ 30k € max ,after taxes, but safe work and good payment after retirement) ? Is there any international certification that should be enough ? Just dont know if it could be a waste of time, becouse I am at a spot to just get practical experience.
Any opinions of you pros ?
Big thanks in advance :)4 -
What's the best way to leave a job at a small studio?
After months of searching and interviews, I got an offer for a pretty sweet gig at a large company.
At the moment, I'm working at a tech start-up that seems to be having problems with the "start" part of it.
I am the only fulltime programmer. There is a more good chance that me leaving will shutdown the company.
I don't particularly like my boss, but I don't want to financially hurt the guy.
The job is gonna require some relocation, so once everything is finalized, I'll still have more than a month to wrap up everything here before even starting to move.
What can I do to ensure I've done all I can to leave this company with all it needs to go on without me?9 -
Okay, yes, modsecurity WAF is amazing and all, but... When one tries to implement its rules atop an existing app that wasn't developed in accordance to the rules... That hurts.
How tf am I supposed to parse and present a 6.5GB / 22M line audit log to the client?! Just parsing that monstrosity once takes *minutes*, let alone doing any sort of sorting / analysis!
I feel sick. This is exactly why I am a sysadmin and not a programmer, I don't like writing analysis stuff, or programs more complex than a few hundred lines of bash... :|5 -
!rant
I am shifting to India and curious about something.
Do people in Indian companies talk about clean code or ddd or tdd or pragmatic programmer or programming practices type of thing?
As I said just wants a heads up.11 -
8:43pm
Should I use django rest or graphene?
8.52
*Creates serializers and views*
9.32
I think mutations will work just fine
10:54
I don't need access to all models from the client
11:12
Let me start a new app and import models from the existing app
00:23
I am a programmer, I have no life. -
I started down my career path to make games. I have never really made anything good. I think I am finally fed up with not doing this. So I am going to be working on selecting a game engine. I want 3D, I want to experiment with voxels, I want a permissive license, I don't want something huge, I want to contribute back in a meaningful way, it needs to support 3D. So after looking around I found Godot. Another programmer who lives near me uses this as well.
Does anyone else have some good positive experience with game engines for smaller projects? I have played with UE4 and Torque3D/2D. I don't like the bloated feel of UE4 even though its a very cool engine. I didn't like their install system at all. T3D is old and not up to date.2 -
Well Django, I think I've fucking HAD IT WITH YOUR STUPID FUCKING SHIT ALREADY.
./manage.py shell
In [1]: from inventory.models import ProductLine
In [2]: ProductLine
Out[2]: inventory.models.ProductLine
In [3]: ProductLine.objects
Out[3]: <django.db.models.manager.Manager at 0x7f03e23017b8>
SO WHY IN THE FUCKING FUCK DO I GET
"""
, in ProductLineViewSet
queryset = ProductLine.objects.all()
AttributeError: type object 'ProductLine' has no attribute 'objects'
"""
FUCK ME
I hope I just FORGET I am a programmer, wake up tomorrow free to go work at fucking McDonalds and die in mediocritity anyway. FIANLYL Get to catch up on fucking work and I have to diagnose this inane fuckign django model problem that I dont fucking see anywhere on google, SO, etc right now
Best I can find are all like "You've probably defined something else called <model class name> in that file." But Grep and I sure as fucking tits can't find it!!!!!
Time to fucking make an exact copy of everything but change it to ProductLine2 and watch it all work perfectly fucking hell am I really this stupid or am I going to eventually find a bug after hours of GETTING FUCKING NO WHERE OMN THE STRUPIDEST FUCKING SHUIT IVE EVER SEEN FUCK ME7 -
On my first job I was a "Web developer" who made websites with WordPress and I was the only Web developer. Now on my second job I am a "Web programmer" who made websites with Joomla...
-
I have been slack in the past with testing, in the last 2 months I have got better and better at sticking to TDD. Now I am Addicted! There is a God like feeling that comes with having written bullet proof testable code.
Anyone who thinks it's a waste of time or is putting it off just do it and stick to it, you will become a better programmer and write better code. -
One of top clients, a Designing firm started asking for non-programmer jobs like office templates.
Client sends in .indd and .ai files.
Me: Requests for psd version as I lack tools for .indd and .ai
Cient replied: "I am not used to being asked for png’s to be made when I provided you with an AI file for all logos. I do expect you guys to use a little bit of nouse / imagination and work out that you can create the png yourself from the a.i. file provided. This is something no other programmer asks me to do."
Me: U for real? Why would a developer like me have Adobe Indesign installed in my machine?
pfft.1 -
I know I am merely a mediocre Programmer, but do you really have to sit right next to me, commenting on every single line I types?3
-
Am an amateur programmer. Started with GitHub today, even though my core head(boss) believes I'm well experienced with it. To begin with, I uploaded the previous project via the browser interface. No big deal. Then to start making pushes, I made a minor variation in the index page of the project and tried to push. Took me six commits/pushes(yet to figure out what are they) to get it up in the remote version. Just realised that all the commits are recorded and anyone can view them.
Idk what my boss will be thinking about hiring me.1 -
This guy has been a “php programmer” for 3 years now and yet he doesn’t know where to find Apache logs, is it weird that I am finding this really strange?11
-
I am doing a POC for someone I've only met once... The POC wasn't a ton of work and the expectations were realistic. We are going to meet again soon and discuss more things, and eventually decide if we want to do business together.
I have absolutely no idea how to tell if this person is legit and able to do the things they say they can. They claim to be able to sell the product they want to make and allegedly have contacts in the industry. They are not a programmer, and want to vet my friend and I. If things go well, it could mean a lot of money. If they don't, it's a lot of wasted time. I suppose that's true for any start up.
This is when i hate being an awkward engineer. I don't have the knowledge or, quite frankly, the people skills to make this kind of judgement.
Have you ever been part of a start up where you were 50% of the engineering team? If so, did you know the partners ahead of time? How the hell do you vet someone with a skill set that is the exact opposite of yours?1 -
Programmer at an interview:
interviewer: introduce yourself
programmer: Hi, my name is ______, and am a programmer,
you can actually call me a programmer because from the top I look good, but from the bottom I am naked.
comment below whether you will be hiring this programmer on not.7 -
so, this is gonna be a little long question regarding life as a programmer . hope you can bear me.
so, the situation where i am is that i spend all my day in laptop cause i want to change the world and make better living for the poor by the support i can give to them using my knowledge. but eventually nothing is happening that way. my parents and siblings complaint that i spend all my day in front of the screen coding apps and doing some kind of programming. but the fact is that nothing is coming out of that . sometimes i feel depressed about it and it's kind of like i start hating YouTubers and promotional spammers who show how you can change life and earn billions with just your hello world apps. i had an app on play store which was doing decent but this year my publisher account (developer account) got terminated because i breaked some policies about whom i didn't knew exist.for now i just want to earn enough money and wanna help out people in my twenties.2 -
How does Programmer enjoy their Life?
Girl: Do you drink?
Programmer: No.
Girl: Have Girlfriend?
Programmer: No.
Girl: Then how do you enjoy life?
Programmer: I am a Programmer8 -
Hello folks. This is not a rant but a call to comrades for suggestion and advice. Currently, Java programmer by profession. I am planning on migrating to Python and am looking to start learning. Looking around for tutorials/projects/courses to learn. Please suggest your insights. Thank you.
-
!rant
Just made the leap from a company with and I.T. Department of 8 people to a company with an I.T. Department of 5000 people. At the old company, I was a SysAdmin, DBA, Helpdesk, Programmer, etc. 7/8 were programmers. We all had our hands in pretty much every aspect of the companies technology. At the new company I am just a programmer. I only write code (well, I will soon. There is a LOT I have to learn about how this place operates). I worked at the old companies for almost 3 years (2 as an Intern, 10 months as Salaried Full-Time) so it's weird having most of those aspects of my old job stripped away, yet at the same time it's somewhat freeing in the sense that I am now only responsible for 1 slice of the pie, not the whole damn thing. Anyway, hope everyone is having a great monday!1 -
So I work in a school as a network manager and general admin, but it is commonly known I am a programmer too. Anywho, I got asked by a member of staff to find a way to add all teachers to the classrooms (we use Google classroom) and I wrote down what he asked. I spent my evening at home working on it and got it 50% done and finished at work the next day. This member of staff comes in and was happy, so I read back what he asked me for and he turns around and says "Oh, I wanted you to add all classrooms to one account, didn't I say that" I tried to explain he didn't but he chocked it up to me not listening. I even showed him the piece of paper on which I wrote down what he wanted but no, it turned into a shouting match and I told him to leave. I finished the script but I'm wondering if I should actually give it to him. What's your thoughts?6
-
So the other day, an old acquaintance asks me (a noob full stack dev) for advice on what programming langs to languages to learn.
I (like all other noobs eager to help) asked him about his previous programming skills, if any. He says "Yes yes, I did a course on HTML and CSS." To this I ask, what exactly are you looking to do. Back-end development he says.
I am frustrated with people asking me what to learn and how to learn when they are not even willing to do slightest of the work themselves. I am usually very helpful to people, but as a programmer, I would certainly try to do a complete research before I go around asking others.
What do you guys do? How do you handle such questions.4 -
I want to start a blog, and the name will be “I have a call degree/I am a programmer, but how do I”. Through this blog I want to share things I learned by my own, like seriously, nobody taught me to write full stack application, nobody taught me how to write opencv in c++, nobody taught me how to write a simple game, anyone has any suggestions?2
-
I started with programming through a Minecraft mod called Computercraft. You programmed a computer with lua. Some time later I played with python, and then I was hooked. I am a self taught programmer and have tried many different languages since.
-
Can anyone suggest what should a 16 year old python programmer from India should do. I think ml and deep learning or hot right now so I am learning those. Any suggestions, thanx in advanced 😊4
-
HI I started to learn Angular I have created some small projects but sometimes I think I shall not be good at programming. I always think about how will I improve it. I am doing lots of practics but the thing is that I forget concept after some time
I am not feeling well and always think that I will never be a good programmer.1 -
worst sin? 🤔
I guess not following any best practices, really bad formating, no comments, simply puting all code together just to make it work. I cry everytime I have to dig through my old codes 😫 such a shitty code, such a shitty programmer I was (am) 😔😓 -
Hello, I am a starter programmer. I don’t know too much about programming, just a few things. Do you know a course or any website that can help me learning to code? Thank you!11
-
I am now working on some pdf generating, trying to create pdf/a conforming documents and oh boy, what an ugly world that is.. not only there are some nontrivial requirements for the documents, but the only suitable (and expensive) library we could find so far for this is poorly documented, has horrible interface (for a simple programmer who "just wants to create a pdf, man") and even the stackoverflow cannot help with some issues.. fml3
-
i feel like a fucking failure, I am so tired of programming, i dont even like it anymore, and all my coworkers are programmer gods. I feel like a burden. Part of it might be imposter syndrome but for the most part its true.10
-
Just found it somewhere but its funny!
A programmer is walking along a beach and finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears. “I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish, but only one wish.”
The programmer pulls out a map, points to it and says, “I’d want peace in the Middle East.”
The genie responds, “Gee, I don’t know. Those people have been fighting for millennia. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits.”
The programmer then says, “Well, I am a programmer, and my programs have lots of users. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes.”
At which point the genie responds, “Um, let me see that map again.” -
Maybe more specifically/realistically… i need a dev with data science experience that is also as optimistically psychotic as I am… I got wicked ambition. (Just make sure you can apply clear hermeneutic transparency to your math confined programmer brain)5
-
!rant, reality check.
This may sound odd, but sometimes i deny wanting to learn a term or meaning of something because it is a severed thing from my knowledge.
E.I.: i read "Hey you can use LINQ for this!" as i am programming in C#. I do not mind reading up on what LINQ is, why LINQ is etc.
But, if i run into something like hey you can use XAML or whatever the hell, which i can't mentally link to anything i know, i flatout even refuse to look it up, or try to find out if it is related to my skills and if not, flat out ignore anything besides the basic concept.
Eventually i could still end up learning it, but if it doesn't click from where i am at right now as a programmer, i just skip it as unrelated noise.
Technically i deny to learn something, making me a bad "student" in a way. Otherwise i use my time optimally to only expand my knowledge on the borders or my current knowledge.
Does anyone else does this? Anyone longer then 4 years? Does anyone also apply this outside of programming? How did all that go for you? Is it a bad habbit or a good one?3 -
Hey guys!
Once again, I got a little stumped when writing one thingmajig in Python.
I am normally not a programmer (Work as sysadmin), so I don't really know all the fancy abstract ways things are done "properly", which is why I need to ask here:
I have a program, separated into parts. The "core" is a part that sets commandline argument structure (using the argparse library), loads master configuration file, sets up the main logging facility, and then proceeds to load "plugins" - python files with one or more classes that implement one specific abstract class that forces them to implement a common interface of init, run, cleanup functions.
The core then proceeds to initialize those classes, run the "run" function, and run the "cleanup" function.
If the plugin class throws a Warning, it is only logged and runtime continues. If it is anything else, the program logs it and stops.
Now, the issue is, sometimes, a user may want to continue even if a non-warning occurs.
Lets say that I am creating a user, and the user already exists. Sometimes, the program user might want to continue with further plugin execution. And what I was told was to implement specific commandline switches that force continuation of runtime despite the plugin failing.
How should I implement it? The most obvious thing is to add a specific switch for every plugin, but that is exactly what I am trying to evade. I want to have the core as abstract as possible.
Other solution I thought of is to have a file of some sort that would list extra switches to implement, then it would be up to the class to implement if it uses the switch or not (I pretty much pass the entire Namespace received from parse_args() function), but this also feels kinda hackish.
I thought about having some sort of function that the plugin could call in the core to add a new argument, but at the point that plugins start loading, the argument parser is already compiled and cannot be changed further.
Any other ideas of how to re-implement the program are also welcome! I may not do it this times, but I'd at least learn something new again.3 -
I have been doing android dev for quite a time now and have started to understand/appreciate a few things that I previously hated (Like Kotlin) . so am not sure where would be my stance regarding this rant in upcoming months, but FUCK DEPENDENCY INJECTION FRAMEWORKS!!
dependency injection is rightly said to be a $25 term for a 25 cents concept. If i start refactoring my old apps today to "follow DI principles", they would require just 5-10% refactoring and i will end up with much more testable code.
But integrating dagger in my apps? Oh please fuck me straight instead. That thing is so overly complicated and confusing. Why would you trust compiler to inject instances in YOUR LOGIC ? it was YOUR LOGIC that guided the compiler, remember?
I am yet to work on a product of scale where frameworks like dagger or koin made even a slightest of sense.
Currently it just feels like another bad choice we took between "simple but verbose" and "complicated but pretty to look at"
The way this framework makes me think like a compiler than a programmer somehow reminds me of this beautiful article i read:
https://theatlantic.com/technology/...3 -
Well, what should I say. I don't know if it happens to anyone here. But I recently made a backend in Go. I am not an experienced programmer either and I had to complete my main project in Node.js first. I was short on time too.
But me being a great lad, thought: let's do the server side in go. So, started learning go and then web programming in go. And well, didn't complete the project in time.
Lost the guy who hired me. I am a freelancer btw. Although my thirst for learning was gone. I have faced this problem many times. The desire to learn new stuffs instead of trying perfect what I already know.1 -
WHAT. THE.
https://youtube.com/watch/...
1. watch video
2. comment your thoughts on it
3. read the following copypaste of my thoughts
4. comment your thoughts on whether I'm stupid or he's stupid
5. thanks
----
I am a programmer and I totally prefer windows.
1. I'm (besides other things) a game programmer, so I use the platform I develop for.
2. Linux is the best OS for developing... Linux. But I'm not developing linux. I want to use my OS and have it get in the way as little as possible, not test and debug and fix and develop the OS while i'm using it, while trying to do my actual work.
The less the OS gets in my way, the less stuff it requires me to do for any reason, the less manual management it needs me to do, the better.
OS is there to be a crossroads towards the actual utility. I want to not even notice having any OS at all. That would be the best OS, the one that I keep forgetting that I'm actually using. File access, run programs, ...DONE.
p.s.
if i can't trust you, a programmer, to be able to distinguish and click the correct, non-ad "download" button, or find a source that's not shady in this way, I don't want you to be my programmer. Everything you're expected to do is magnitude more complicated than finding a good site and/or finding the correct "Download" button and/or being able to verify that yes, what you downloaded is what you were after.
Sorry, but if "i can't find the right download button" is anywhere in your list of reasons why "linux is better", that's... Ridiculous.
6:15 "no rebooting" get outta here with this 2000 crap. because that's about the last year I actually had to reboot after installing for the thing to run.
Nowadays not even drivers. I'm watching a youtube video in 3d accelerated browser window while installing newest 3d drivers, I get a half-second flicker at the end and I'm done, no reboot.
the only thing I know still requires reboot within the last 15 years is Daemon Tools when you create a virtual drive, but that one still makes sense, since it's spiking the bios to think it has a hardware which is in fact just a software simulation....
10:00 "oops... something went wrong"
oh c'mon dude! you know that a) programs do their own error messages, don't put that on the OS
b) the "oops... something went wrong" when it's a system error, is just the message title, instead of "Error". there's always an "error id" or something which when you google it, you know precisely what is going on and you can easily find out how to fix it...18 -
Five years ago i started to study It & Economy and after a couple of months i said to myself that i am never going to be a programmer because i hated it. Everything about it. Guess what.... 😂5
-
People of devRant, I need your help! I am finally buying a new laptop - ive been using a Dell N4140 for the past 4 years and I absolutely love it. But it's about time to retire the machine and upgrade.
I'm a programmer, I don't play games and haven't used windows in the last 2 years. Im looking for a 4-8GB RAM under $1000K. I plan to replace the HDD with an SSD. 13' is too small a screen and i feel 15.6' is slightly on the large side. I have a 21' external monitor anyway. My old dell was 14' and i loved it. And looks really matter for me. Alsooo, I dislike having a number pad. Its useless for me.
I know I'm picky. I can't afford a MacBook right now (about to graduate from university), but if you could help me in finding the right laptop, I'd be really grateful!14 -
I am using python and matplotlib as a substitute for microsoftword plotting .. could i count myself as a programmer ? Lol
-
Hey!
Would you recommend React Native, or Electron for a not really experienced programmer?
I am just starting with JavaScript, and these two tools are the most fascinating to me. :)
I have been learning C# in school, but mostly had to teach myself in the past year.
Anyway, thank you, if you answer, it is really nice on devRant, and it's my first developer community to be part of! :D
Sorry for the broken english - not my primary language.6 -
Just these little things that can drive you insane: TCP should guarantee that the order of packages is preserved, but somehow through a splitting of the message I get them files mangled. OK, might be our own fault, but then I just do a simple grep on the log file, but it won't display anything if I escape the f** dot.
Google it. No I didn't do it wrong, try different quotes. Nothing. Why then does it display the thing if I delete the dot?
Beginning to question my sanity. Grep just. has. to. work.
And that very moment the blinds of the window automatically go up, so the blazing sun blinds us, which as management told us, is not a bug but a feature, protection from freezing bla bla - and the control of the blinds gives me static shocks but refuses to shut them down again.. *sigh*
Just these little things. - Don't know, but I am convinced at the right time, a little mispunctuation or a glitch in a UI could drive a programmer mad. -
Am I missing something? I'm a software developer and I like to sove design problems but when I search for something like 'effective problem solving by programmer or software engineer' it always comes down to data structures etc.
I am more interested in design part of it? How can I search for the system designers who are not web designers etc.
What to search for when I want to see how someone has solve interesting system design problem?11 -
am I the only person that searches up stuff like "best tools for programmers" or "apps every programmer should have" after I finish learning quarter of a language
(Btw I found devrant by searching up "social medias for programmers)8 -
!rant , a question (on the end, after explanation) :
https://youtube.com/watch/...
this is a result of (according to my time tracking) 10 hours and 50 minutes of coding.
captures mouse cursor into list of points, uses those to triangulate a flat polygon (manually doing all the mesh math of ordering them correctly, earclip triangulating, and indices generating), as well as to create inner and outer outline (no official algorithm, my own which I came up with on the spot) of a certain thickness.
(the outline drawing is just for debug yet, now I'm going to extrude them upwards to form walls)
soooo... I've been always curious about how effective/fast/efficient of a programmer I am, but it's usually hard to measure/compare, so I thought I'd try this way: how long do you think implementing something like this would take YOU?
thanks :)5 -
A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says, “Can’t you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!”
To which the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.” -
first of all sorry for my english, its not my first language
hello, i am an aspiring programmer and im honestly just a really big newbie, im learning vb dot net and ran into an issue that i had. So basically i was using the WinActivate function from autoit with FindWindow(using the title of the window) to supply WinActivate the hwnd. Heres my issue: When the window is NOT minimized so selected or behind other windows the WinActivate function works completely fine, but when the window is minimized it doesnt work, i have read on the documentation that neither function cares wether the window is minimized or not so i came to the conclusion that it might have a different title when minimized? The window is the league of legends client by the way. What can i do to solve/debug this issue, perhaps spy++ could help me? how would i use this, i could upload the visual studio project if someone wants to help me out in that way. WinActivate((FindWindow(Nothing, "League of Legends"))) this is what it looks like.12 -
Recent Software engineering graduate. (NO RELEVANT JOB EXPERIENCE also not a great programmer)
Most of the software engineers I have met are working in web development and mobile dev, I understand web and mobile I understand they are hard and require a lot more with APIS CLI and all the other things but I don't understand where is the engineering part in them. I also don't know what am I supposed to do as a software engineer.3 -
I am a beginner in programming. Started to code some 9 months back. So far I have learnt some basic C, Python(from LPTHW), HTML, CSS, JavaScript(from Coursera). I want to advance my skill. One of my relatives who is a programmer too advices me to learn SQL now and then learn PHP. So according to you what should I do now. I also want to develop my Python skills to using its frameworks so that I can make some real stuffs with that.
Pls suggest me my next move and also tell me from where can I learn these things( free courses could be of more help to me). I want to quickly learn the most of these so that I can make a dynamic website and web apps in the near future.
Thanks in advance!5 -
I'm almost ashamed to ask this but...
I need help with git, not GitHub but just plain git.
So I have Linux on windows because I realised all i need is bash, not all of Linux. So I'm taking a tutorial on git because... I'm a programmer, I need to know this. So I am also doing some demo stuff on my own and... I have no clue where to put the file I want to handle with git. In pretty sure I should put it in the file containing the .git folder, which includes .bash_history, etc. But when I git init and git status, it doesn't see it, so am i doing something wrong?
To be specific the test file is in
C:///Users/...6 -
I want to ask for your opinion guys, because I don't know if I am right or wrong.
So, some days ago, my brother sent me some code to check out for an automation that he does for testing purposes, since he's a QA (I am a programmer). He should be able to send XML data to a server and depending on the process that he tests, the data is different every time. I saw a strange thing, he hardcodes the XML tags and concatenates them with data which I find stupid. So I proposed him to use a template to generate XML data, because I think it's more flexible and easier, making data and presentation separate. That way if in the future he wants to start using JSON he could do it in no time. I made the code in a separate file which he imports and uses it's functions (they are two so no need for classes) and uses them to load the template and render it as he passes the data as a hash table. He insists that concatenating data and XML tags is easier and simpler and I can't wrap my mind how could that be true. I gave him an example in which the data structure for a process is changed and he have to open the file and change the XML tags or the structure and he still says that's simpler.
What is the right decision in this situation. Keep in mind that I simplified the process a lot and it actually involves sending the data and reporting the results, but they are not important here since I am talking only about generating data. -
Nodes Reach
I will google my last error message
I cannot tell where this conviction comes from. Whatever birthed it is a mystery to me, and yet the thought clings like a virus, blooming behind my eyes and taking deep root within my mind. It almost feels real enough to spread corruption to the rest of my body, like a true sickness.It will happen soon, within the coming nights of pizza and energy drinks. I will google my last error message, and when my brothers turn on thier computers, my questions will be scattered over stack overflow with one accursed tag
Nodejs.
Even the name twists my blood until burning oil beats through my veins. I feel anger now, hot and heavy, flowing through my heart and filtering into my keyboard like boiling poison.My fingers stretch out. I am strong, born only to code and debug software. I am pure, googling the most obscure of error messages, trained to break down problems and use console.log. I am wrath incarnate, living only to code until finaly my program runs.I am a programmer in the Eternal Crusade to forge humanity's mastership of the code.Yet strength, purity and wrath will not be enough.
I will google my last error message
My Nodejs application won't run.
*Watch the Original !! by Richard Boylan here*
https://youtu.be/1D4jr-0_COg