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Search - "i swear."
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So after a long day of CSS’ng for building a new form layout, I walk out of work and see this 😨
I swear the universe is cruel at times.9 -
GF: please remember the flowers!
Me: I'll set a reminder.
GF: and don't forget to wrap them in water.
Me: I'll see what I can do about the laws of physics.
GF: ... I swear to god..
Me: yes yes I'll wrap them in water.7 -
I swear all my clients are like these! I can probably teach a blind monkey faster than these idiots.
PC: marketoonist4 -
Fuck the EU. Fucking puppets. I'm literally going to go and create my own fucking country, i swear to fucking god.11
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If I learned every spoken and dead language ever created in human history, I still wouldn't have enough swear words to describe how much I loathe SharePoint.5
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I'm so fucking done with all those "woke" YouTube programming tutorials like: "Why you should NEVER use else statements", "Why functions should ALWAYS return a value", "Why switch statements are actually EVIL" and stuff like this
I swear to fucking god26 -
Confession of the day:
1. I work in release mode
2. I work on the main branch only
3. I test on production13 -
Collegue *yells through the office*:
Hey IT-guy the file is not there, where is it ?
Me: what file is not where ?
Collegue: you know that file i've been searching for 30 mins now on the Google drive.
Me: Have you tried hitting the name into the search bar ?
Collegue: Sure dude, I'm not stupid.
Me -> *one the way to her desk*
Collegue: OH! never mind I found it with the search bar. I swear it hasn't been there before!
*turning around, going back to my desk*
-fml6 -
I swear to you... This is how my uni cools down its servers
Oh god the mess 😥, gets worse when your in there3 -
I'd be handing in my two weeks notice if I got some shit like this.
Don't get me wrong, I understand it's not that professional to swear during work every sentence. But come on, I'm going to swear if I fucking want to every once in a while.11 -
Had my first official job review with the boss today. I should try to swear less but except for that it's going great!
Yay!8 -
CEO once thought it would be hilarious to give everyone Christmas bonuses in the form of little brown paper bags filled with fifteen hundred $1 bills.
Was a little awkward trying to deposit. 👯♂️3 -
I swear to god Dick Davis is the coolest wannabe and biggest threat here..
PS - This is a figure from one of my textbooks5 -
Was asked to log into a website by my company and I swear something was up... I needed to double-check
Yup... it's even worse than I thought.6 -
I swear down.
There is a developer out there. His one mission to break something in such a way that it only falls over at 1AM.
I hate that guy.4 -
I wanted to rant about some code that should run smoothly but somehow doesn't run at all, then I realised I don't know enough English swear words to express my anger and frustration.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯4 -
Why the fuck would you assign two new values to the same variable in consecutive lines like that ? I swear this project is driving me nuts. Fuck the dev who wrote this.4
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Literally all they see is design.
Users can't make or receive payments across the entire app? Ah, who cares! Much more important is the color and fading animation on that button!!!!
Absolute clowns, I swear.
🤡4 -
I just programmed a counting sort algorithm, and I swear to God I think it has AI. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't.3
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What the fuck is this. I swear every time I look at this codebase I find something more stupid than I did last time.
I can't wait to throw the whole legacy system away.13 -
So you're telling me, that "margin-bottom: 10%" was more unreasonable than this?
I swear to God maintaining code is just absurd...12 -
It's amazing how much you can do only in 1-2 hours. Somehow I was in full productive mode and I swear I completed tasks that would normally take a week because of how lazy I am normally.3
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Me: Hans, Get ze Flammenwerfer!!!
Hans: Why?
Me: The fucker rejected my PR because "calling twice the same getter is a code duplication". I swear, he always tries to find something!3 -
Thank you so much for the goodies @dfox and @trogus
Now the duck can swear at me with it's high pitch noise when I am unproductive 😃2 -
I swear I'm going to kill someone if I ever see another "create REST API with Express in 10 minutes" tutorial.4
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Big News from corporate today, we are no longer making bots to replace people. We are now "virtualizing" the workforce.
I swear I'm living in a dilbert strip...2 -
Although im more of network engineer than a developer, I feel safe and welcomed here. I swear im not a spy!11
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Make sure that when developing software and using print outs to test output to not use swear words.
Last presentation when demoing to a customer I ended up on a white page saying: "Shit fuck!!!!!!" Embarrassment was an understatement... 😅1 -
I recently had to explain to my girlfriend why I was searching for rubber ducks on Amazon.
She doesn't get it. I swear I haven't caught another weird addiction! 😨 🐤5 -
<rant>
I swear to god if see another "Here's how I made my amazing new website with Wixs" advert on Youtube, I'm going to throw my laptop out the god damn window!
</rant>8 -
I swear “remote” has become the most hated word for recruiters, the moment you message it they vanish, never to be heard from again…5
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I don't swear while in office.
I don't swear while at home.
It takes me about an hour to get home, during that time tho ...6 -
I have noticed on here, there is a direct correlation between the number of swear words in a post and that posts ++ count. As a programmer who doesn't swear (I know, "just give it a few years" or "YOUR NOT A REAL PROGRAMMER!!" [side note, I also don't drink coffee]), I guess my ++ counter will only ever be allocated 1 byte...10
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Whoever's the fucker that want my pictures over in DMs in Discord please stop asking for it or I swear a big tiddy onee-san will ara ara you in bed, and that won't be me15
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When I was a kid I fucked with a ouija board and now trying to debug massive regex expressions I swear Satan has finally come to screw me9
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Dear fellow JS devs, if you make 1 more good damn module loader I swear to god....
Hi - here's a new module bundler named parcel.
FFS3 -
Every time I get a new phone I swear "this time I will keep my browser clean".
One week later dozens of _interesting_ taps opened. 🙄6 -
SOMEONE PLEASE JUST TELL ME:
HOW DO I STOP BEING SO FUCKING AWKWARD!!!!!!!! Tell me please, i swear to you. My life would be so much better if i wasn’t so awkward and have social anxiety. Tell me what to do because i’m tired of it, i hate it so much.42 -
If ever your code breaks, just utter these words and it will magically fix itself:
"Wtf. Hey [coworker name], Can you sanity check this code? I don't know why this segfaults! It looks fine but you just run it and it bre- oh wait... I swear it didn't work a minute ago."6 -
I swear to god I am this close to writing myself a Sudoku solver for those damn Mass Effect Andromeda Puzzles3
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I just deactivated my Instagram account and
My ....gOD..
It feels like i just came out of a prison... But invisible mental prison idk how to even explain this shit
I fkig swear social media is worse than CANCER22 -
I swear next time I see a UHD TV sold as 4K I'm gonna pop a cap in the lying fucker who mislabeled it!
4K has 552,960 more pixels dammit! This is the "720 HD" bullshit all over again!2 -
I swear macOS Sierra is worse than Windows Vista, I need to type my password like 10 times to install and launch XCode...7
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I fucking swear the servers in the data center know when the fuck I'm going on vacation.
YOU CHOOSE TO DIE NOW YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?
It's okay. It is no longer a critical box, but gah dammit.2 -
Okay I just had the first good experience of my college career (It's my last semester)
Professor put the PDF versions of all the textbooks in their syllabus.
Swear to god I nearly came.
Good job, professor. -
As someone who doesn't know a lot about JavaScript, but occasionally needs to create some quick and simple scripts, I swear I'm going to kill someone if I read "just use jQuery" one more time on SO.7
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Computer related shit follows me everywhere, I swear. Went to a friends house and low and behold - this gem. I knew someone smelt like what I imagined a domain smelling like...1
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I swear I could sell my layout debugging to sports teams and colleges and cities stuff, they could use them as flags!4
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I swear performance is the last thing on the minds of some developers. It’s going to be a long weekend for me.2
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I SWEAR IF I USE ANOTHER WEBSITE OR FUCKIGN WEBAPP THAT SCROLLS UP TO THE FUCKING TOP OF THE FUCKING PAGE OR AT ALL IM GOING TO FUCKING LOSE IT11
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Turns out I had some conversion issues and timing issues in the SD card file parser that I wrote... wtf it worked before I swear
It fully works now!!! I can now finally load presets from an SD card and apply them to the screen at my leisure.5 -
I swear, once I called in sick just so that I could finish coding a feature without distractions( like pings and shit)
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I swear preparing an app update that's going to be deployed to 500+ people stresses me tf out.
I hope I'm not the only one who feels this way.9 -
I swear if I quit my job as a developer and became a stripper I’d still get adverts from udemy, code academy and the rest about become a developer 😭😭😭 when will they fuck off11
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I swear to god you'll never feel more epic while coding than when you listen to the dovahkiin song.3
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I SWEAR TO FUCKING ANDROMEDA, IF THIS APP CLOSES AGAIN AUTOMATICALLY, I am gonna open it again but man I am tired.8
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I swear, the next time I hear a web developer say to me: "Yeah let's pretend as if the security hole in the website isn't there, because truth be told, i cannot be bothered to fix it."4
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Dear Sourcetree,
Crash one more fucking time before I commit and I swear to god I will jump through a fucking moving semi truck.5 -
LoL, I swear, some of these job ads..
- You study Java every day
- You anticipate and you follow Java trends every day
- You go to our Java events
Oh so you mean I don't have a life? No thanks.5 -
That's it, it's over, I'm done! I'm officially a graduate! I have my paper and I'm out!
Goodbye preditory USA college related companies and practices I won't miss you!
I swear If I ever have to hear the name Pearson again.....8 -
These script kiddies fuck with my error metrics! I want 0 !
I swear I'll find them! Even enabled IP log for every request contain “.php”.
Needless to say, app is not even in PHP and PHP isn’t even present on server12 -
I swear my ISP has already done away with net neutrality. My connection is always going out whenever I need to look something up for work.3
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When you realize that the bug is happening because you copied your own code and forgot to replace some variable after you pasted it... Damn you brain! Do not copy/paste ok? Or I swear I will drink a lot on Friday....4
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In my software development class today, the teacher asked us what a double equal sign means, and I swear to god, a student said “it double equals that value” 🤦♂️4
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status update on the codebox IDE revival project:
WHY THE FUCK DOES PTY.JS REFUSING TO BUILD? YOU IMPREGNATED TWAT, I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DON'T BUILD RIGHT NOW IM GONNA FUCKING DEPRECATE YOU AND REPLACE YOU WITH XTERM2 -
Someone needs to make a site that generates cool project names because I swear it's the hardest decision to make.15
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It amazes me how quickly give out their passwords. I ask for a person's user name and I swear at least 75% of the time they give me their password too!5
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I swear to God, I have gut wrenching feeling every morning before work or when I think about work. My stomach actually hurts now.4
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I swear.. Whoever comes up with a better and fixed version of CSS that makes sense when you use it should probably get a Nobel Peace prize for the peace of mind it would give to its users..!!!2
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I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
I solemnly swear I won't help anyone no more.
(Fucking bitch dragged me till 3 A.M, NO SHE'S NOT WORTH IT)3 -
<!-- Dear future me: I swear to god, if you play with this, I will claw out your eyeballs and eat them for lunch. You've been warned. -->
</div>3 -
Who else has to hear the nagging from family members, significant others, friends etc... when you say your planning to get another laptop, desktop, or even a new monitor?
I swear I hear the nagging every week almost.6 -
I SWEAR TO GOD IF I SEE ONE MORE BUGGY AS HELL SHITTY SNAP PACKAGE I GONNA LOSE MY SHIT AND KILL SOMEONE11
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I've just spent the morning writing a C# program that pops up a message when I say hello. It's the most basic thing when I look at it now but as I was writing it you'd swear I was breaking technological boundaries!6
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Happy Christmas fuckers.
I don't normally swear, but I'm with family in Ireland and I'm not the designated driver for once, so fuck it.
Have a good one!1 -
So I just realized we submitted an Android assignment containing a notification with a bunch of swear words ! The submission closed a week ago...
Here's to hoping they have a good sense of humor!..
*Awkward laugh and smile* -
I swear to God there is a special place in hell for people that ask for updates on shit when they are not even paying.2
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I swear it's like my company's NAS is just a room full of 3.5" Floppy Diskette drives somehow hooked up in a RAID 10 configuration.4
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HR: Do you work under pressure?
Me: Yes, but I swear very much.
HR: what?
Me: uh.. and sometimes I punch in the face, yes just in the face.1 -
I swear to god if I made a website twice as good as Google my friends would still use Gmail to piss me off2
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Sometimes I read a rant on here, and I swear its a co-worker of mine that's written it since I've heard him make almost the exact same rant....1
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I swear, 90% of the times I edit a message after posting, I'm turning "your" to "you're" and the other way around.
Occasionally have to edit typos that autocorrect has adapted to for some reason.1 -
<rant>
Tomorrow is my bd and I swear besides seeing my friends all I want is to find this bug.
</rant> -
I swear every one of this week's weekly rant could be remixed together with the sound of silence playing over it all...
EDIT: now that I've said this I really want to do it...5 -
Bootstrap:
Making developers say "fuck it...ill just build it myself" since its inception.
I swear....for small intranet shit sure...whatever y know...but when it comes to actual design this piece of shit is so quirky.7 -
I will reiterate my goal of 2020 and 2021:
Finish my personal project and bring it to market!
It will happen this year, I swear! 🤣2 -
I swear my brain has 2 sides:
1: c or c++ would be great for this project
2: lol c++ hard so nodejs
1: but c++ would be so much faster and c-
2: NODEJS6 -
Sorry I'm on my computer during the meeting but I can multitask I swear!
(I can definitely write code and troubleshoot with other devs on Skype, while you're talking)
I never said I was listening to you though! Lol!1 -
I swear IBM is just incapable of making a product that doesn’t fucking suck. I am terrified of their work with Quantum Computer research...because I just know they will fuck that up too.11
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"I need the login credentials for the CMS service"
*sends the email confirmation email*
"No, I can't confirm your email for you. In plain English: send me the email and password to login."
"Ohhhhhhhhh"
Literally what the fuck is wrong with these people.
I swear we're all fucking doomed.5 -
How to know when you're bored?
You feel like building CLI based applications for social media like twitter (And i swear i didn't steal the idea form the devrant version of this)11 -
Followup on https://devrant.io/rants/547497/
Sister: ever since you've started coding, the Mac has been slower. I swear to god it's your coding9 -
Today is Independence Day here in Brazil. Holiday n the middle of the week. I swear to not touch a computer today :P3
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Dear rust,
I swear im not going to modify that string, i fucking swear on my life pinky promise, just plEASE LET ME USE IT WITHOUT HAVING TO CLONE.
Sincerely, a functional programmer6 -
i swear i'm so braindead sometimes
i was seriously wondering why i couldn't do an absolute function on an unsigned number4 -
I swear my co worker said we were meeting at the data center at 10pm all week! I call him and he says 10:30. Wtf?!!! Well guess I got some time to read more rants.2
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FUCCCCKCKCKKC FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKING CUNTFUCK BULLSHTI FUCKK!
I SWEAR TO GOD LINKING LIBRARIES IN C++ IS THE WORST FUCKIGN THING ON THE ENTIRE FUCKIGN PLANET.
sfjipomndgsm8h rteügj8jq9rtg11 -
Developers must have an oath like "I solemnly swear that I would develop software that I myself would be happy to use.7
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I solemnly swear to never buy a laptop with a realtek WiFi adapter again. Linux kernel doesn't fucking support it.10
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Decided to return to writing again and take yet another break from coding and decided to restart my book that I'm working on...
I swear coming up with variable names is fucking easier than working on the first chapter .-.13 -
I swear on the Almighty nature, I fucking hate Browser compatibility.
Passing php data via JSON encode. Works superfine on Firefox and Android mobile browser doesn't on Chrome. Fucking shit. Been sitting for 13 hours and gave up. FFuuuuuuck !!!!
Form submission via ajax and it again works on Firefox but doesn't on Chrome. I just can't understand, my mind is fucked by all the angels in heaven. Data gets submitted, the form is reset but the function called to refresh the JSON data doesn't work.
Someone please kill me or I swear I will fucking kill everybody.4 -
best ad services to use? I really don't want to use google. even if they paid double, I wouldn't use them. anyone know? I'm talking about for websites and/or apps21
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Took 6 months off from coding...
sat in a JavaScript class today and couldn’t remember what a base case for recursion was...
Dear tutor,
I swear I can be stupid but please bear with me, I try really hard
😭😭😭8 -
Whenever I see someone swear, for example, 'fucking managers'. I think of fucking as a verb.
Which makes it 'managers that are fucking'. Pretty entertaining when you're bored or having a bad day. 😅2 -
Do you guys swear 😏, I do a lot about tech but I don't see anyone on here doing that
Nothing like shit I just shocked myself
Or mother fucking ie die in a hole
You know the usual5 -
How i love US companies and their tendency to just lazily send out a programming quiz as a part of the interview.
Look i swear i can make a fucking java bean, i just suck at coming up with algorithms okay?1 -
So I'm toying around with an old Pentium M laptop I used to use back in 2013-2015,and it's surprisingly more useable than I thought it would be,but I swear I don't remember the internet relying so heavily on JavaScript.6
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i think im losing my mind.
i swear i placed like, 10 labels on my VB form, the designer even shows it's there! but when i run it for testing it all disappears!
i think i need a break.8 -
I don't know if AI makes people dumber. But it lends me to believe that people who swear by it might be dumber.
Time will tell how useful the code generators are.
I should go play with chatgpt today...9 -
I swear, developers search histories are indistinguishable from terrorist ones.
How are we not all imprisoned yet ? 😂7 -
Me: *tries to save a file using inscape to my documents folder*
AVG: OMG OMG I SWEAR INSKAAPE JUST TRIED TO DELETE *literally the file I just tried to save* BE THANKFULL WE MADE SURE YOU CANT BE PRODUCTIVE WITHOUT TURNING OFF YOUR AV3 -
Where's my Monster?! Why's it in the trash can, I swear I didn't drink it that fast. Damn you Illuminati!!!3
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I swear two thirds of job offers now are in insurance and banking. And if that doesn't spell "incoming crash" for you then idk. We're in for some fun times.1
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Anyone else just bleed time like no one's business?
I swear some days I blink and it's 140:00 with nothing to show for it19 -
I swear to god, the next time someone brings in sh*t to a meeting again that's totally off-topic, I'll grab a nerf gun and turn this place into a f*cking war zone!1
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I dream of the day when I can go to work and actually work. I swear this client has a masters in pointless meeting, the other day we had a meeting to 0lan a meeting.3
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I no longer work with those !Ð↑Ωŧ$, but when ex-teammates told me that they have to escalate some issue to them and pasted the responses they got from that team..
Ooooh boy. I REALLY want to create new swear words.1 -
I swear, 95% of the time whenever I threaten to start using my Task Manager or restart my computer my apps start working normally.1
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My company got drunk in the meeting decided to go out to town and live it up ... we got loads of work done... I swear...1
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Bash on Windows is incoming soon! As a dual boot win10/Ubuntu user I am pretty psyched. Curious as to what you all think, and opinions from insider program participants.
I just hope it isn't half-assed.4 -
I swear to God if I hear one more person complaining that their wifi doesn't work I'm gonna lose it. Is the difference between the wan connection to your ISP and the connection from your wifi router really that hard to understand?4
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my life: dealing with shitty bullshit technologies to scrape together some money so i'll be able to retire for a few years before i die
🤡
I swear a year long+ (or permanant) sabbatical is on the horizon, I'm utterly sick of this shit6 -
Last year, 2nd year of Uni, we had to create an app that read from CSV file that contained info on the no of ppl in each class and things like grades and such and had to display graphs of all the info tht you could then export as a pdf.
This had to also be sone in a team. I, however, hate doing anything other than programming (no team leader, pm bullshit) so I tell them I want to be one of the programmers (basically split the roles, rather than each one doing a bit of everything like my professor wanted) and we did.
I program this bitch wverything works well, I am happy. Day of the presentation comes, one of the graphs is broken... FUCK. I then go past it and never discuss the error. We got a 70.
I swear to God it worked on my computer -.-
I also have to mention that our professor was the client and he had set an actual deadline until we can ask him questions. After the deadline I realized I didn't know what a variable in the csv file was for and when I went to ask him he said "You should've asked me this before. I can't tell you now". My team was not the only one that didn't know and he gave the exact answer to everybody else. Got the answer from another team. Turns out it was useless.
He was the worst client ever. Why tf would you put a deadline on when you can ask the client questions?! I should be able to fucking ask questions during production if you want the product as you want it >.<7 -
Final year of my diploma in Information Tech, I overhear a coursemate, well-known know-it-all, explaining what Javascript is:
"It's somewhat like Java but it's used for scripting purposes."
I swear to the Lord Almighty, I wish I could drive my palm through my face.1 -
I swear if you try and ghost me after making me waste my time with those labrat🐀 tests...
...let's just say you're going to find all your companies email inboxes in pretty bad shape by september3 -
Alright windows, why is Chrome receiving fractures of my bandwith, but edge can get it all? I swear, I can stream FHD on edge, but not use soundcloud on chrome. This smells fishy to me
-
I've a question. Has anyone in here ever be forced to use something as remotely frustrating as SQL Server Reporting Services (ssrs)? I swear it is one of the most convoluted piece of shit ever.
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!rant
I love that you can get Google to swear. In her oh so British accent. Voice search : 'what does FML stand for' -
I swear the implementation of byte arrays in dot net is fucking brilliant, never thought I would give good credit to dot net but the amount of bloody times this shit has saved me is unbelievable...3
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Saw my previous dev professor in an event, almost 5+ yrs have passed since I last saw her.
We were tied to a team and when she asked me what skills can I contribute I said Web Dev, I swear her face turned sour with disappointment. What's so wrong ?2 -
Install Instagram, Facebook.
Utter words like "Gaming Laptop" "Predator" "MSI" while screen being locked.
Voila, you get an ad.
PS: I swear I didn't search for any MSI or gaming laptops in google or even typed those words in recent past.5 -
I swear to fucking god if one of my colleagues is going to yell "hosting" again at me (note they do it in a higher pitch than their normal voice)
I'm going to break something..14 -
Every assignment is done by reference in JavaScript... like why? Lemme use a pointer when I need it.
ES2016 looks so much like Java, I swear nobody will notice if they added pointers... and over 9000 more confusing features.12 -
I swear devRant must use a custom keyboard parameter on android because it is the only place I have aggressive auto correction... I look at half the stuff I posted and it's just filled with broken English 0.o
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My bash history today:
man column
🤦♂️ I suppose if the wife is curious about what I do all day, she’s likely not going to search my terminal history 😂4 -
Me: woo going to a massive LAN party, going to start hammering out some development, writing and gaming!
Friends: there's a pub just around the corner!
Me: *breathing intensifies*
I swear I'm not an alcoholic from all my rants containing grog or being induced by it but I swear it pops up every time I'm pumpedabout doing some coding...1 -
I swear to god, If I have to explain git bisect to another "senior" one more time!! Like, how do you _not_ know this?! Know your basics, please! 🤬14
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Today, another colleague of mine said a client wanted three logos at the top of their website. As if it wasn't clear enough what site your on...sheesh. I swear clients have the best ideas and know how everything works...2
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I swear I will KILL the next one who comes to me to pimp up his excel sheet WITH FUCKING VBA -.-
This shit is so annoying.... Just because I started my apprenticeship and need to learn everything like a 3 year old kid...
Get me outta here! -
do you guys also dream about code or is that just my brain? i swear to god, if i see something awful at work i dream of a way to fix it7
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An employer should ALWAYS make an indentation test among the tests given in job interviews. I swear to God I'm cleaning this scss file with a flame thrower
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I swear YouTube has become the new Twitter
it keeps recommending to me so much drama I've never heard of. this name that, career ruined, things are stealing from you! new outrage machine14 -
Client sending files containing / in their filenames..
If he ever send this shit again I swear I'll be chopping off his thumb and sticking it up hos arse, it'll sure fit whatever bizarre fantasy he have for doing such atrocious things.8 -
I had to deal with a shitty project that I had to make a pre commit hook to make sure there was no swear words in the code.
https://gist.github.com/meain/... -
Well, everytime i say hie to a random girl, i swear they look at my shoes first, so i have resolved to stick my upcoming devRant stickers onto my shoes instead of my laptop9
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I swear both gl_PrimitiveID and the noiseX functions don't fucking work. No reason at all, they just don't want to work. Attached is a screenshot with a """""random""""" shade of blue per vertex (with flat interpolation) based on screen pos1
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Is there any modals for angular 2?? The ng2-bs4-modal gives unexpected token error. I swear after this project I am never using angular. Worst framework ever.
React Js all the way.2 -
Did anyone notice azure seems to be down now.. Sometimes I do wonder should I create a twitter account just to swear at MS...7
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I swear last time I had this much fun on a dev social was swift and it shut down and then gitter and then quora and some I never cared about but this is gold
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I swear this is the PM's first time experiencing a scenario where you fix a bug and two more pop up.
"ThIs ShOuLd Be SuPeR sImPlE, gUyS" -
!dev
I swear YouTube's recommendations are fucked. I watch one fantano review of a song that just dropped and YouTube is over here like
"hey, do you want to see what EVERYONE thought of that track?"2 -
I swear these underclassmen are in a contest to see how many unique one letter variable names they can come up.1
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I swear I will commit a hate crime if my ISP keeps messing up the order
I expected to have a connection to 1st November to maybe the 5th
I still haven't gotten shit -
I’m juggling 3 reference books for a microprocessor course this semester. Have to study 8085 and 8086 microprocessors and interfacing them. Everything seems more interesting when exams are near I swear. I find this course genuinely interesting now9
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What does composer.phar even do? I swear it downloads six versions of itself before installing the required packages...1
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I swear I still cannot figure out how to adjust my chair comfortably for the life of me, and I don't want to embarrass myself by sitting down on the ground and spend 30 minutes figuring out how to make the back not fall when I lean back.1
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I swear i just heard my computer breathing out deeply after i closed all of the unneeded browser tabs.1
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Me: HM let's fire up my old pirate game prototype and see if I can do anything with it before sea of thieves comes out and everyone says I'm copying...
*Turns on Xbox and goes to store*
Me: ah fuck! -
If you ever make rating request pop up when user makes something else, I SWEAR TO GEEBUS, I'll make you regret your life choices!5
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Do any of you have jobs that actually stay in their damn lane?
I swear... First day back from leave and already I'm getting messages 10 minutes after I clock off9 -
Wow spent another 20-25 mins mapping out the stack calls to see why varchar was trying to be converted to Nchar which isn't supported and found in my mapper class one fucking method had rs.getNString() which I swear I never touched the mapper class since I made it and was working just fine!!!! I swear IntelliJ is straight up fucking with me2
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So I finally got full computer access 2 and a half weeks into working, and now there's "scheduled network downtime" with no indication of when it will be back up. I swear I'm never going to get anything done here
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Am I crazy? A while ago I SWEAR I remember someone mentioning deep blue having a free student account program... am I making this up?1
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yet another rant about shitty documentation, this one isn't readable without copying it out somewhere else.
How does someone decide this is good enough to post online, i swear some people don't proof-read anything anymore -
Is there a page somewhere to slutshame the employers and their job postings, I'm scrolling now trough job ads just for kicks and I swear to God some employers should be banned from even asking for employees.2
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Every time I decide to reset my working environment I get last minute requests flagged with the highest importance.
I swear it's a God damn conspiracy. -
Paying most taxes is optional.
The opting out just has a very bad UX.
You have to know on which island to register your freelance business, there's a lot of paperwork...
I swear nobody thinks about the user -
I swear to god of I have one more developer recommend EMAC to me I'm going to change my career back to marketing with the explicit purpose of rebranding EMAC users as the neck beards among developers! AARRHGHH2
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I swear it's been over a year since I've used a optical drive on a computer.
Hell my personal rig has no optical drive.
Disc is dead!!!! -
Listening to clients & producing goods for a ridiculously cheap price & still manage to get yelled at. I swear everyone wants shit done for free. That's the amazing part of being a developer :)1
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I swear.
I will find the person who realized the category-management and the arrangement of items inside Woocommerce.
And when I'll find you, I'll make you change all the categories inside every single fu***n item.1 -
Anyone else have a manager who absolutely LOVES to "derail you" and then says "sorry I don't mean to derail you but can you work on..." I swear tired of working for another person
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Hot and humid in my countryside office. I swear if one more fly dive-bombs me then lands on my screen I'm going to burst 😡😤2
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I swear on a Fragment's 'Life'cycle, you can only get better at developing with each project you undertake...4
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I swear to god I feel like I'm getting paid to just watch my boss code. My job is more debugging and submitting the pull request for whatever the boss throws together over team viewer.2
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When you find out that your team has been saying you’re the the biggest impediment... 😔 I know I swear and get annoyed a lot, but that shit cuts deep. I didn’t think it was that bad...3
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Is there a minimum amount of months I need to work for a company I'm fed up with so it doesn't look too bad on my resume when I finally quit?
I swear I keep thinking of quitting more and more every passing week.4 -
Do the first project for a cheap price, I swear I will pay you more money for the next ones.
I've heard this so many times now, it actually makes me wanna kill myself when I hear it again from someone new.6 -
How do u stay civil when your code doesn't work and it's been hours? I feel like punching something but I swear I'm not really violent. I just feel like it.3
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Anyone ever used odoo?
i swear i don’t use it anymore.
hard install. hard to use plugin. changed my setting and create account on windows without permit. wtf!!?
very hot head. #slang in thai2 -
I swear! I just typed some words, I pressed [Enter] key and....
Oh my good, I broke the machine ...
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry !
PS: this message is not alone, I found another one about a deprecated function once I clicked on a link... -
So sick of a flimsy/fragile dev environment. Introducing docker at any level just increases risks, I swear.6
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I spent 2 hours in an agile workshop with the "I do not think it means, what you think it means" guy.
When finished I could swear that if you asked the people what is agile, they would start crying. -
Has RAM quality just fallen off the deep end? I swear I remember a BSOD could mean just about anything, now it seems to be failing RAM every time.
Also, why am I troubleshooting it? I know a few programming languages, so suddenly I can fix anything plugged into a wall?14 -
I swear there is something about thinkpads with linux and vim with dark solarized theme that makes me hard... well... you get the point2
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Urghh
I swear web push notifications are the betaest most betty beta thing
Half of the time they don't work and misbehave without trail -
Judge: “Do you solemnly swear that you will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth ?”
Elizabeth Holmes continues speaking in her fake voice: “I do.”3 -
Did I miss the memo on the latest trend or something?
The past week every teams convo seems to be hitting me with the “hello?”, “are you there?”, “gone for coffee?”, “?”
I swear they’re copy pasted because I reply within moments of the first rude message 😂4 -
Sometimes I really don't know how else to put it lmao, I'm on the level of caffeine crash and overtiredness that I literally typed in "clear" to the Windows file save dialog. I swear Python has made me suffer for longer than Java has, and that says something. Help.3
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All I want for Christmas, is a space for me where I could openly swear at people and say horrible things to them.
Am I asking for too much here?7 -
Tangent space normal maps are going to drive me insane I swear to god
Why can't you just work??? 😭😭😭 -
Hey does anyone know about any programming groups/clubs/meetups around the Aztec, NM area?
I swear there's almost nobody out here interested in code -
'Cuz every time we merge, I get this feelin'.
And every time we merge, I swear I could diff.
Can't you see my merge conflict, wanna force push commits,
in the remote history of Git
https://youtu.be/4G6QDNC4jPs?t=323 -
When something not working I start to swear to the code.
And you know that when it comes from the heart you swear in your mother language.
*ja qifsha rracën*
😡😡😡😡 -
God fuckin dammit, I swear to heaven if this bitch ass code returns IO.Exception file is being used blah blah blah even though I'm using filestream and streamwriter. I will lose my shit in this fucking office1
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Maybe devRant still has issues, I swear I've seen this post about 6 posts ago. Oh, it's a repost...4
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I could almost swear, when Windows 10 is ready to install updates on my PC it starts slowing it down so i can restart it and then it can proceed installing them.🤔
but oh well...thats too far fetched1 -
Today I felt the pain of losing a child. My test server got nuked, I did it... It was an accident I swear :'(
Will have to spend the day restoring everything dammit!1 -
I swear to god I'm going to break one of these people's heads with a brick. maybe not this time but one of these times.
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I miss the spammers, and being able to openly swear at them. Like that chaosesqueteam guy, ashishtikhile and etc.4
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I swear, I swear this is going to be the last (the best, also, but mostly the last) webdev gig I'm gonna do. SO. FED. UP.
When I end this, I have one month I want to spend in refining some other tech related skill. The main two points needed: a decent pay, a fair amount of free time (I have to study along that: math major, my singing/piano/maybe other stuff too during the year). What do you suggest? Linux sysadmin is a thing I can reasonably become in that windows of time or at least compatible with my needs? Because it catchs my eye. 😵 -
I swear if i see on more goddam youtuber I like kick their originality in the groin to do a linus tech tips reaction video.
I'll literally find their home address , stab them in the knees then go on to crap all over their setup as they watch. -
I swear, the semicolon in asterisk will be the death of me...
Two hours sifting through a dialplan to find the culprit.1 -
When you spend 16-20 hours a day in front of a computer you have to keep things fresh.
Got some of these
https://a.co/d/0u8FvIy
to go with this
https://a.co/d/6ludmps
after using this for 10 years
https://a.co/d/0PDxmxL
and the experience is night and day. Just having lit keys has improved my life drastically.
I also got one of these to mix up my day
https://a.co/d/icAfaET
and one of these to try to improve my 3d workflow
https://a.co/d/ebd9b5A
but I'm not convinced yet.16 -
anybody know any 3rd party YouTube apps that allow for music and no ads? I swear I've seen one but I can't seem to find it11
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another fail. this time during uni diploma defense. i'm the most unlucky person i swear. i didn't speak very confidently and got 93/100. those who were confident, got 100... #3002
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When did it become difficult to wrap 3d models in textures? I swear it used to be as simple as dragging a graphic on to an object :(
I feel so old and in the way.2 -
I swear, there will come a day when I stop confusing Grafana and Kibana. The two things sound too similar for their own good.3
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OMG
LVM
WHAT A PIECE OF CRAP
It's so precious that when it detects an existing mdraid signature, it just *won't* let me create a physical volume over it!
No matter that I run pvcreate with double-force switch.
It doesn't matter that the system doesn't even have a single MD device defined (Which can be easily checked in /proc/mdstat OR by checking the /dev subsystem)
I *hate* commands that are trying to be more clever than the admin sitting behind the keyboard.
Sure, leave this as the default behavior (It could save a lot of people's data I bet), but BLOODY HELL GIVE ME A SWITCH TO OVERRIDE THE CHECK YOU DUMBASS.
I swear... I feel like I'll get a frickin' brain hemorrhage from this "clever tool" -_-"5 -
I swear some people code too much because they dont want to write some bash nor bother with the posix way of piping everything together.4
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So… I’m on that fun side of autism spectrum where you’d swear I’m just an ass… and my entire fam/friend network has always picked the latter; so, proceed to read as you will, but I swear my ADD is largely manufactured by the misaligned mental connection of the “inspector and inspected”… to say, smart is as smart does… and I ain’t doin spit if you watchin(but then i know everyone watching 😂🤡)
class Clown(self)
Def _init_(self, name)
Clown.name = “me”
Print(clown)2 -
Is the scrolling to first new comment when tapping a one or more new comments on a rant you commented on not working? I could swear that was working at some point5