25 phrases you wish you could say at work more often

(Warning: Contains naughty words...:-)))

1. Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

10. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

11. I like you. You remind me of me when I was young and stupid.

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

23. No, my powers can only be used for good.

24. You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.

25. Who me? I just wander from room to room

The beginning of my freelancing time. I was so naive. Didn't even used contracts...

This one client wanted a website with 2 specific features until a certain time. It should look nice, but only the features functionality was defined. All seemed reasonable at first.

I delivered 2 weeks before the deadline. The client was furious, as it didn't look like they imagined. They wrote me 8 lengthy emails with very fractioned feedback. It was becoming unreasonable.

But hey, I'm a newbie in this business. I have to make myself a name, I thought.
Oh was I naive....

This whole project went on for 2 more months. The client was unhappy with every change and 2-5 emails a day with new demands were coming in. I was changing things they wanted done 2 days ago, because they changed their mind.

Then they started to get personal. They were insulting me and even my family. My self-confidence dropped to an all-time low.

In the end I just sent them all the code for free and went to therapy.

BTW: this was also my most important experience, as things went up hill from then on. As Yoda once said: The greatest teacher, failure is.

The marketing department is right next door to my office, and to make room for their new intern, a very high end, large, and noisy printer was 'temporarily' placed in my office. I'm a reasonable person though, and didn't mind this. The salespeople figured out that it makes commercial grade printouts, so for their various presentations and whatnot, they'll print enormous numbers of pages on this thing, and basically use my office as a motherfucking water-cooler. After a few weeks of this, I logged into the printer from my computer, and set it to disallow all connections from MAC addresses other than those in the marketing department, who print far less material on their own, special, dedicated printer. Absolute fucking chaos ensued. Grown men were brought to tears, ultimatums were made, and blood was shed. The hardware guys were down here for over an hour, making up absolute bullshit as to why it wasn't working(which really surprised me).

Long story short, cut off access to printer, sit back and watch the true face of humanity emerge. Seriously, fuck those guys. They have their own goddamn printer.

I’ve been told my rants are being missed, since I left my hellhole of a job. So here’s a filler until something major goes wrong.

Right so here’s what my life is like at the minute. I’m working remotely from home. So this morning, instead of spending 2 hours in traffic, I got up at a reasonable hour and brought the dog for a walk. I don’t know who these people think they are, fucking up my routine like this. The audacity of them thinking it’s no big deal really pisses me off.

I’m the only iOS developer in the company. Normally I get bombarded with “why not use react-native” or “RxSwift is the future” and other shitty tools. Last week I said “i’d like to do X this way”. Do you know what those absolute bastards said to me? You ready? Hope you are sitting down ... they said ... “ok, sounds good” .... the fucking c***s.

Oh oh and the big one, wait for this now. Fridays are demo days, last Friday I showed what I was working on. Afterwards the CEO comes along, stares me in the eyes and without a care in the world what his comments might do to my self-esteem the fucker says “wow great job”. He fucking makes me SICK!!!

Feels good to get all that off my chest. I’ve missed venting. At this rate, I’ll be back very soon!

Holy fucking shit.

Why do people always expect you to know absolutely everything the second they ask?!

PM: "Yes yes of course we can do that!!! We've done it a million times, we do it for breakfast HAHAHAHAHA"

ME: "Well not really, we've never implemented a solution like that one, its gonna take some time to figure it out"

PM: "HAAAAHAHAHA HE'S SOO FUNNYY LMAOFUDKSJ DONT WORRY WELL HAVE IT READY FOR TOMMORROW :P".

Holy fuuuck I understand you wanna make the sell but you need to give the costumer a realistic look at things, at least give a reasonable deadline for what he's asking! FFS ASK ME HOW COMPLICATED ARE THE THINGS HES ASKING FOR BEFORE TELLING HIM WHEN THEY'RE GONNA BE READY! MAKE A FUCKING ESTIMATE, WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A TEAM!

Oh and this rant is gonna happen, dont care if I get fired.This needs to change.

84 hours. Took alot of coffee and adderall. Had 5 projects with reasonable deadlines until mother fucking hurricane Katrina decided it wanted to be the best cocksucking blowing bitch around and knocked power out for two weeks. I managed to get 3 projects finished before i passed out for a day but two clients got pissed off cause their projects were late. They were pissed off even more when i had to pull the Forced Majeure clause cause they wanted to be bitches and didn't want to pay for my work

TL;DR: Hurricane didn't kill me so deadlines tried

First job.

CLIENT: It's just a small website, 15-20 pages 2,500$, what do you say?

ME: Sure, sounds easy.

CLIENT: oh, and I need you to sign this contract that you won't copy or competete with me for the next two years.

ME: Sounds reasonable.

-- A year later --
I had finished building a huge CMS system that serves 420+ organizations, the entire thing copied from his competitor.

CLIENT: So there is only about two weeks left of work...

ME: Goodbye, I have a new job that actually pays money.

CLIENT: Don't forget our contract...

ME: Sure..

At least he paid me, but 2,500$ for a whole year's work isn't such a good deal anymore.

My thoughts when my uncle was introducing me to one of his friends.
(M = me, U = uncle, F = Uncle's friend)

U : Meet M, he is a software developer, he works at * blah *.

M (Internally): That is a very reasonable introduction.

U : * Continues speaking. *

M (Internally): No, staph! It was good enough. Don't go any further.

U : He does * blah blah *

M (Internally): That's not even remotely related to what I do.

U : If you have any tech related problems, he is your guy.

M (Internally): You should have kept shut.

U : If your phone slows down, he can fix it.

M (Internally): Why would you even say that !?

U : He can fix all you printer issues.

M (Internally): Excuse me. What. The. Fuck!?

U : You should definitely consult him before purchasing any tech.

M (Internally): That's it. I give up. There is no hope left.

F : * Gestures U to clam down. *
F : * Nods at M in a very assuring manner. As if he were saying, 'chill bro! Its all cool, I understand.' *

M (Internally): Hold on. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe there is some hope left.

F : So, tell me, how good are you with excel formulas?

M (Internally): * Dies *

This seems perfectly reasonable

Dear Apple,

We've sent you a new message regarding your app, Xcode. To view or reply to the message, go to the Resolution Centre.
----------------------------------
We noticed that your app did not fully meet the terms and conditions for reasonable fucking update size. Your latest app update requires over 40 GB of free fucking disk space. Please bear in mind that many of your own fucking laptops only have 120 GB of disk space. For optimum user experience, it would be best if the user didn't have to uninstall other apps from their system just to run your shitty update system.

Next Steps:

To resolve this problem, we recommend that you fix your shit. If you are unable to fix your shit, we recommend that you don't take 30% of all iOS developer's income so that you can make giant fucking glass donut buildings, and instead use that ridiculously disproportionate monopoly-abusing cut and invest that money in fixing your shit, to lighten the load of developers on whose backs you have become the most cash-rich company in human history.

Resources:

There are plenty of resources such as Stack Overflow to take advantage of, in order to learn how not to create a bloated piece of shit IDE.

Once you've completed all required changes, please upload a new binary to the App Store.

Modern software has gotten so bad that it even gets sluggish at times on late 2018 flagship devices. Slow, cheap hardware like is usually developers' and fanboys' excuse, particularly when it comes to Windows stuff? Like hell it is.

Software "engineering" has become so.. terribly inefficient. I'd dare any developer worth their salt to rewrite their program to make it work on an early 2000's machine. After all, those can run pretty advanced GUI's, have a reasonable amount of hardware (just think about how large a gigabyte of RAM really is) yet should be able to make for a reasonable limitation set.

Hardware limitations are the mother of optimization. Not every person on the planet has a 32-core Xeon workstation with 64GB of DDR4 RAM and a GTX Titan in it. Whether your application performs reasonably well on your machine shouldn't be the metric. Try deploying it on that laptop you tucked into a shelf years ago and reevaluate.. please.

And definitely you Slack!! Slacking off, is that what inspired the name of that pile of junk?! 😡

Got very little sleep last night, not in a great mood to begin with. Came into work to find someone borrowed one of my cables that I need and hasn't returned it. It was wrapped around a few things to keep it tidy, all of which have been moved, stretched, bent etc. Now my battery is running low and he has emailed to say won't be in for 30 minutes.

Think the only reasonable course of action in a just world, is for me to strangle him with the cable when he gets in. I mean come on, whats the alternative? Still haven't gotten that pen back from last year ... this place is going downhill fast!

So I was taking a Linux class in college. I knew Linux pretty good at this point but it was a required course for my degree. I found some other people who were programmers in other languages like python and C and we just fucked around the whole semester. End of semester is coming up and the teacher poses a problem: write a bash script to do this complex thing that bash isn't the best language. But it's a Linux class. Everyone is typing away while the four of us are stunned, having no clue. So we did the only reasonable thing: write a bash script which echos a full python script to achieve it into a file, run that python script, then delete it. We submitted first and got extra credit. She threw it up on the projector as an "extrodinary example" of a good script, having not looked at it. She complimented us profusely, never turning around or reading it.

Seems reasonable

I generally like to separate changes into as many commits as is reasonable. That way I can go back and see how, why, when and what was changed, along with meaningful commit messages.

But sometimes...
Git add *
Git commit -m "changed lots of stuff"

God I hate myself.

My boss is still forcing us to support IE11. Recently, we started having even more bugs with one of our vendors on IE. We filed bug reports with the vendor to fix it, and they came back with "no. Why would we fix anything for IE11? Not even Microsoft is fixing anything for IE11." Boss's answer: well, let's make a separate component for IE11. Probably using flash and/or silverlight. We asked about redirecting IE traffic to Edge, he said that's "the nuclear option." So, doing the thing that Microsoft suggests, that involves not much work at all is "the nuclear option"; ignoring industry standards and recommendations, introducing well known security vulnerabilities, losing money, and trying to circumvent the vendor that serves out our major product, however, is totally reasonable. Our IE traffic is less than 3% of our users at this point.

I told my boss I'd been offered a job somewhere else with a better position and pay and he presented a reasonable counter-offer in under two hours which included an on-paper promotion and matching payrise.

I stayed. 🙃

I’ve never actually had a colleague quit while I was there, buuuut, I did have a colleague disappear, here is that story:

I get hired by this colleague, seems like a nice, perfectly reasonable guy.

I’m supposed to be mentored in the codebase by him after I start.

Literally the day or day after I start, he gets a tap on the shoulder from someone in HR while he’s on the phone. He says he can’t come because he’s on the phone.

The HR woman insists, tells him to leave *everything* and he never returns.

Turns out the police were downstairs to arrest him.

He got caught up in Operation Yewtree which for those that don’t know, was the UK’s sting op on historic pedophilia cases.

MFW my manager gets arrested and the senior dev is too busy to mentor me, so I basically have to sink or swim 🤣

There is no reasonable excuse for doing anything less than your best.

- Robert C. Martin, Clean Code

A reasonable derivation.

Fuck that fucking company three way while dozens of homeless HIV crack junkies puke and shit their diarrhea on the three bosses!

I can't put it in words how stupid they are!

Let me try to tell you the latest story while I try not to get multiple strokes.

Backstory: We are three devs, all with a TCCI certification. One has been working for us for almost a year, the other one has been working for us since one and a half year. Both are good friends of mine, btw. I have been working there for almost three years.

Fortunately, I am allowed to work on a reasonable computer. The other devs work on PC's with Windows 7 and 8!

One has just 400 MB space left on his drive and has to delete every month some shit because he does not want to be able to call up websites anymore... How awful?!

The PC of the other great Dev Crashes three to six times a day and needs about 30 minutes to start up!

We can be so productive, but...

We told that in February one of our bosses and asked him to buy new hardware. His answer: yes, of course, I understand that, it's my turn (he always says that "ich bin da dran")

We got a new colleague in the middle of this fucking month. She is responsible for conception.

She works on an old notebook, but today she gets a fucking new PC to work on while the devs are trying to weld with a sparkler! Better hardware than every other Dev PC!!!

Guess what? She is the daughter of a friend of one of our bosses!

We are the only devs at this company.

Fuck that fucking company! Fuck that fucking bosses!

I think we don't go to work for that fucking company anymore!

There are 3 types of questions.

Type 1 is a question that can easily be answered and mostly appears as the first result in Google.

Type 2 is a question that can be answered by stitching together various type 1 answers.

Type 3 is a question that has not been answered. It may be a bug you’ll have to find out about by reading an email chain 12 years ago or maybe a reason why epoll() doesn’t work on Linux VMs. There is no solid yes or no. You’ve most likely encountered this when reaching page 3 of your Google results and every link is purple (visited).

This is where depression and isolation hits. This is where you realize that if you can’t help yourself, no one else can (or has the experience and time to do so). This is where you must rely on your knowledge and infer an answer to your question pushing your concepts and theories to the extreme. If you solve this question, you’re solving it for someone else who may trek the same path later in the future. You’re solving it for the world!

If you’re willing to solve, attempting to solve, or even giving a reasonable inference about a type 3, you have a true engineering mindset.

Happy new year fellow coders, developers, may your next deadline be reasonable. Have a productive night with less bugs and more coffee!

Client(over the phone):- I want an Android app where there job seekers and recruiters.

Me:- sounds reasonable enough, ok

Client:-i want job seekers to apply for the job and recruiters to post the job.

Me(gets a bad feeling);- doable ok.

Client:- and I want an admin user who can see all the users and do everything.

Me(yup there it is):- what do you mean by everything?

Client :- you know everything, talk to recruiters talk to see everyone using the app, you know everything.

Me :- no I don't know this "everything" that you speak of, tell me more, what screens (activity) should that have and stuff.

Client (getting irritated):- everything the admin user usually does.

Me(yare yare daze):- i will show number of users in a graph.

I have a feeling this is not over yet

* Go to sleep at reasonable times
* Watch some of those anime I never quite finished
* Read more books
* Become more proficient with rust
* Replace go with rust at work
* Setup a weeb media center I can remotely
* Finally make a personal webpage/blog without overthinking things, to actually get it done
* Find or make a storage solution for all the memes I sto- I mean collected, where I can add tags to find them more quickly. Would love to have them have the tagging be done automatically with machine learning, but I don't think we're quite there yet.

I managed to re-negotiate my offer to reach the (accidentally) advertised range exceeding my original (realistic) expectations and this is in huge part thanks to the helpful bunch of you here.

So: Thank you!!

And I can't belive that in a single fucking day I benefitted more from posting to devrant than all the time spent on toxic subreddits, calling useless recruiters, forums and others. Here, even those comments that I disagreed with were phrased in a reasonable manner and they also helped me formulate an apparently very strong argument in the compensation meeting.

My Dream Job?

✅ 100% Remote Work.
✅ No dogshit Proprietary Stacks like Adobe Experience Manager.
✅ Reasonable Timelines.
✅ Management defers all technical decisions to you.
✅ Actually Challenging Projects.

These are my Big 5

I work for healthcare client project in a start up, worked two years straight without a break.

Client is very inconsiderate about developers work-life balance, he always wants to release every features yesterday.

Never had a reasonable deadline, worked late nights most of the time. No one had backbone to control this client from our side.

Its only developers team, no project management, scrum masters or anything, everything has to be taken care by Dev's.

I decided to take a week break from work.

The first day of my leave he pinged me 3 times to change an "from email" address for notification email which no one give a damn about.

I never replied or did anything. But the part of myself is dying of guilt.

Now I can't relax myself completely.

Re-thinking of my life choices atm.

I loved programming since high school, I can work on computers 24/7 without tired. That's how much I love it. Now I'm just tired of it.

If anyone who read this till here. Thank you.

Casual workday be like:

Project manager: It is important we deliver these features.

Me & Coworker: Sounds reasonable, here is how long we need, roughly.

Mgr: Well, the deadline is already set and the contract is signed and written.

M&C: Ummm...

Mgr: Also, while we are hosting the application, we are not paid for operational cost, so make sure to optimise the crap out of it immediatly. Preferably while developing the features.

(A wild architect appears): Also everything has to be built on cans and kubernuts, with rectangular ui and bootstyling and with these internally developed backend frameworks NOBODY tests. Coroporate policy you know.

(A wilder division CEO appears on meeting): Also we are rolling out code KPI's across the organisation. Everyone is expected to Focus on documentation, test coverage and there is now mandatory SonarQube scanning of repos. ZERO DEFECTS PEOPLE

M&C: ...

(Wildest Salesteam appears): By the way we sold the application to these other customers, they love feature XYZ and must have it.

M&C: It does not have feature XYZ

Mgr: It will have feature XYZ

M&C: Allright so with all the extra funding from the sales, we need to hire atleast one Machine learning guy, an extra frontend specialist a developer and maybe funnel some of the funding into slacking the operational budget in the start.

Animated Suit *Railing a line of coke from his gold plated ihpone 15*: What funding? Get to work. Also your havent been super sharp with your time registration.

The only good thing about morning classes is going back home to sleep and still waking up at a reasonable time.

I’ve just talked to my cousin (24 yo) about smartphones, since I saw that he has an old phone and I asked him if he wanted to buy my old S6 (for reasonable price), he declined this offer moreover he said that he is not planning to change his current device. I was kinda shocked tbh how one can live like that (being online only when using PC), a while after that I realised that he was the one who was smart in this conversation, the one that does not get influenced by others in this matter. I wish I could live like that, when he is not available, he’s just not available. I mean this rant is not purely dev related, but, quite a lot of us here are maintaining some projects, maybe need to talk to managers after their work to make some decisions, doing some side projects. I know that we sort of agreed with those rules at the beginning, but don’t forget to stay offline for some time, especially now when holidays are coming and there will be occasions to spend some time with our families. Just a friendly reminder :)

N: Me
M: Mother

M: Can you help me? I can't update pages.

N: Sure *Checks problem* it looks like you installed it with the old apple account, you just need to reinstall it using your new one.

M: What about all my pages documents on icloud?

N: *Compares documents on mac to her other Apple devices that never had the old account* See? The documents would have to be on the new account.

M: Are you sure? I don't want to lose any documents.

N: I know, don't worry their on your new iCloud.

M: *Calls apple support*

N: *Talks to apple support who after an hour of chatting to her through me because I translate customer support to mother confirms what I was telling her*

N: Reinstalls pages and everything is fine.

I was originally going to make a post talking a bit about how people love to second guess anything I say but thought this story provides a decent example. When it's something of a personal nature or someone is asking for my opinion in genral then it's perfectly reasonable to ask multiple people. It doesn't bother me when someone asks for my help, it bugs the shit out of me when someone asks for my help and then doubts everything I say in this case even after providing some evidence to back up my claim and wasting a solid hour. If you ask for my help your trusting that I have the knowledge necessary to assist, if I don't know for certain I'll try googling the problem but even in that case calling support doesn't bother me because I clearly don't know how to help.

P.S. This was my first story, how did I do?

So, today for my SO's father who is already over 70 and wants to try Linux. However, he doesn't want Linux on his main PC for now, rather on the old one so that he can take his time to get familiar, which is a reasonable plan.

But holy crap, what a machine! Intel Core2 Duo 4400, 2 GB DDR2(!) RAM, 250 GB IDE(!) HDD, DVD RW drive. Graphics, sound and LAN integrated on the mobo chipset. It's half a miracle that it doesn't run on steam. The machine had been delivered with Vista and has always been painfully slow.

It doesn't even support booting from USB, but I had prepared a DVD just in case. Surprise: it booted from DVD without issues and with full HW support!

Partitioned and installed, deleted Vista in the process (felt good). I went with the full blown Mint 20 Cinnamon edition because XFCE isn't as beautiful. Also, having XFCE now and then Cinnamon looking different on the other PC would be confusing.

Installation took some time, but worked. Cinnamon's RAM usage is at 750 MB idle, and at 1.1 GB with Firefox started. Once the PC is booted, it runs pretty OK with reduced swappiness and noatime on all file systems, plus unnecessary startup applications disabled. Updates took long, but ran through successfully. Installed LibreOffice and some small games, Firefox got uBlock Origin, Youtube worked OOTB.

That PC somehow had escaped disposal several times - and now has a proper OS for the first time in its miserable existence. It runs so much better than it ever has. Just wow, a "big" Linux desktop from 2020 blows a contemporary Vista out of the water on such an old machine!

*Looks up advice on how to implement something
*Finds reasonable, well written advice on Stack Overflow that recommends not using <insert latest framework here>
*Ignores advice
*Two hours of exasperated coding and git resets later
*Goes back and upvotes advice

Debugging a system error with a good team of fellow developers/devops people is fun.

We had an issue on Friday where we were getting a pretty cryptic error in our error reporting system. A couple of developers and I got together with a couple of devops people and we worked it out well as a team and figured out a pretty complex issue in a reasonable amount of time with everyone playing a solid role.

Nobody tried to steal the show and everyone listened to each other's ideas on what the problem might be. Through and through a great debugging session and made me think about bad ones and good ones I've had in the past.

Writing clean code is what you must do in order to call yourself a professional. There is no reasonable excuse for doing anything less than your best. - Clean Code

So this happened to me occasionally so I hope none of you cringe:

I was writing some new stacks for a new Cloud IDE that went Open Source (give them a try, they're Coder.com), and because working closely and not releasing till I please majority of people who will use it is my paradigm, I spent reasonable time to fix it. Finally everything is sunshi-

"Wait... It's already 3 in the morning? WHAT THE FUCK"

Yep I started around 21:30, finished around 03:30.

I need an alarm clock

Fucking fuckers on Stack Overflow...

I kind a use SO every fucking day, helping people with horrible formatted (don't even start about content) questions, and then when I got a single fucking question once all three years, no fucking cunt out there is willing to help.

Some dumbass even downvoted my (in my eyes) total reasonable, perfectly formatted, good written question.

I fucking hate it, that I spend so much time on that fucking platform, whilst nobody is giving me some help.

Fucking fucker cunts....!!!!

I've fucking got about 2,5k rep, I fucking know, in what fucking dimensions I can ask a fucking question.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

Fuck you EU,

thanks for making every electronics project I do much more expensive in the future by taxing me for something that I can't buy anywhere inside the eu for a reasonable price. Congrats. You made it unaffordable for me to do the one thing I had fun doing. I hate you.

Mail: Meeting about new benefits from working at <COMPANY>. Estimate duration: 1 hour.

Me: Alright, I'll bite. Might even be something I can use.

HR person in said meeting: At <COMPANY> we'll reward you for being healthy by giving you a better life insurance.

Me: Sounds good and reasonable but you also said this didn't require a physical so how...?

HR: Install <APP> on your phone to keep track of all your healthy habits

Me: Wait wha-

HR: Generate our own brand of crypto currency by linking in all your other health apps like google health, and (lists 4 others), goes towards your life insurance and you can even donate water, food or books to the less fortunate! You DO want to help starving children, right?

At that point I just disconnected. I'm not paid to take part in a corporate crypto scheme.

iPhones are ridiculously picky when it comes to finding a mate- um charger. And knowing why doesn't really make it any easier to understand why. If anything it baffles me more.

So, let's start with appliances that are not phones. Think Bluetooth headsets, keyboards, earbuds, whatever. Those are simple devices. They see 5V on the VCC line and 0V on ground, and they will charge at whatever current they are meant to. Usually it will not exceed 200mA, and the USB 2.0 spec allows for up to 500mA from any USB outlet. So that's perfectly reasonable to be done without any fuss whatsoever.

Phones on the other hand are smarter.. some might say too smart for their own good. In this case I will only cover Android phones, because while they are smarter than they perhaps should be, they are still reasonable.

So if you connect an Android phone to the same 5V VCC and 0V ground, while leaving the data lines floating, the phone will charge at 500mA. This is exactly to be within USB 2.0 spec, as mentioned earlier. Without the data lines, the phone has no way to tell whether it *can* pull more, without *actually* trying to pull more (potentially frying a charger that's not rated for it). Now in an Android phone you can tell it to pull more, in a fairly straightforward way. You just short the data lines together, and the phone will recognize this as a simple charger that it can pull 1A from. Note that shorting data lines is not a bad thing, we do it all the time. It is just another term for making a connection between 2 points. Android does this right. Also note that shorted data lines cannot be used to send data. They are inherently pulled to the same voltage level, probably 0V but not sure.

And then the iPhones come in, Thinking Different. The iPhones require you to pull the data lines to some very specific voltage levels. And of course it's terribly documented because iSheep just trying to use their Apple original white nugget charger overseas and shit like that. I do not know which voltage levels they are (please let me know!), but it is certainly not a regular short. Now you connect the iPhone to, say, a laptop or something to charge. An Android phone would just charge while keeping data transmission disabled (because they can be left floating or shorted). This is for security reasons mostly, preventing e.g. a malicious computer from messing with it. An iPhone needs to be unlocked to just charge the damn thing. I'm fairly sure that that's because the data lines need to be pulled up, which could in theory enable a malicious computer to still get some information in or out of it. USB data transmission works at at least 200mV difference between the data lines. It could be more than that. So you need to unlock it.

Apple, how about you just short your goddamn data lines too like everyone else? And while you're at it, get rid of this Lightning connector. I get it, micro USB was too hard for your users. I guess they are blind pigs after all. But USB-C solved all of that and more. The only difference I can think of is that the Lightning connector can be a single board with pads on either side on the connector, while in USB-C that could be at the socket end (socket being less common to be replaced). And at the end of the day, that really doesn't matter with all the other things that will break first.

Think Different. Think Retarded. Such tiny batteries and you can't even fucking charge them properly.

He was a nice guy, skilled, reasonable, a lot of knowledge.
Until he said "I'm going to assign a girl to your project, BUT don't worry, she is very good"

I was about to jump, but handshakes and further jokes went on and I wasn't able to speak up.
Plus he is the CEO assigned by the investors to be our new software provider.

Puking.

Eclipse, you lousy shit bitch of an ass hole - yeah I went there.

So I spent several hours today trying to get eclipse to:
1) just fucking launch without erroring out and crashing
2) actually work with a reasonable dark theme. (Yea right)

But no you hunk of shit, both of these seems nearly impossible for you. And just when I get you to work, the stupid fucking lack of syntax highlighting is just dreadful as fuck. If I didn’t have to use it for Salesforce development I sure as hell wouldn’t.

"I want visibility in the sprint", "Information for everyone! When you do even a small refactoring, you should add a card to the sprint, clear?"
Those were the words of the product manager.

That sounds reasonable but when there is a bug to investigate, he just pops to the chat channel throw a request with a bit of information and asks to check/fix that.

So to keep my sanity, I asked him to create a ticket with relevant information and additional observations so we can have visibility as he was advocating for it ;)

It felt just good to see him going silent :D

My company hired a new person on my team. He was scheduled to start on a Monday but pushed back a week at the last minute. The rumor around the office was that his flight home that weekend was canceled, but he didn’t notify our boss of it until minutes before he was expected in.

Next Monday he didn’t come in, and no one could get in touch with him. We eventually discovered that he was in jail. He claimed he was pulled over on the way to work for a traffic violation, then found out he had an outstanding warrant from a traffic ticket mix-up over ten years ago. Unsurprisingly, when he did make it in later that week, he was immediately fired.

I’m wondering how reasonable it was to fire him. A responsible, organized friend of mine also got in trouble from a traffic ticket she was never notified of, so I know his story isn’t impossible and doesn’t mean he’s a bad person. On the other hand, missing your start day because you’re in jail is never a good look — doubly so after he pushed back his start date the first time. My company has a very open culture so I would have some room to encourage us not to put inappropriate weight on what is often a very flawed legal system.

Sometimes the pebkac is so strong it continues to amaze me.

Step 1: customer updates pos software
Step 2: customer is presented a perfectly reasonable UAC screen with yes/no choice
Step 3: customer panics and takes no further action
Step 4: a few hours later the first customer enters the store and more panic ensues as the update is still waiting on the uac
Step 5: the customer calls us in panic and acuses us of writing shut incomprehensible software

Wish this was an once in a year exception, untill we wrote a bypass for the whole uac crap this was a daily occurance.

Wohoo!!! Boss is paying me more!

Still a bargain for the level of work I’m doing but at least it is more reasonable.

I think its only reasonable that if I must show u my code during i terview process, I get to see some of the code that I'll get to work with if I'm hired.

Starting to think employers just straight up lie up everything..

Why do i need to find out about your shit code on the first day?!
Cutting edge tech my ass...

#fuckapple for holding back the open-web. Most folk don't know that Chrome on iOS is just Safari with a skin; neither Google or Apple want you to know that.

If you hate web-apps on iOS, that is Apple's intentional doing. Apple cannot allow a bug-free and modern browser to run on their iOS devices, else they lose their 30% tax + dev fees cut. There are literally so many crippling bugs in iOS Safari that it HAS to be intentional.

There are email exchanges between Phil Shaffer and Steve Jobs from years past, where Phil didn't believe Apple could continue to gouge users 30%. He argued the open-web would make native apps largely redundant, and so to stay competitive, they'd need to drop the store fees to something reasonable. I suppose Steve Jobs saw a different solution -- just impede browser development.

As someone who develops free and open-source apps, I believe I am doing the world a favour by not supporting a native iOS app. When users complain about missing features in the web-app version, I tell them to take it up with Apple or buy an Android. Guess what? They sometimes actually do just that.

Join me if you have the balls. Tell Apple to FUCK OFF the only way they understand -- threaten their bottom line. At the very least, you'll never need to touch XCode again if you do. If time is money, that alone will make you wealthy.

Why does a restart always solve problems where no reasonable explanation exists... -.-

I've talked in past rants about how marketing loves showing off features to customers that are still in Beta to give us devs more pressure to finish them earlier, but it really just ends up screwing up our schedule since we have to push back on other features.

We had warned them not to do so for a series of reasons. But this time, this time their bad practices has come back to bite them in their butts.

They've been bragging all over to customers about this API integration we've been developing. They caught a reasonable amount of customers whose main reason for hopping in with us was this API integration. We finished the code on time, and submitted to the API provider for them to revise our "app". It's been a long back-and-forth conversation clarifying purposes and trying to fix tiny details and, of course, the providers' emails take almost a week to come back. We're waayy past the deadline marketing had promised customers, and they know they can't really blame the devs.

Sucks to lose these customers, but it feels so good to show these marketing pricks a lesson.

Unpopular opinion: I actually tend to not use adblock as much recently, and think its reasonable to have non aggressive ads on websites, and support content creators. Also, people here that show zero tolerance policy towards any advertisement are really interesting to me to say the least.

All I want for Christmas is.... for Windows 10 search bar to respond and work in a reasonable amount of time and not suck so much.

- finish compiler
- get into gamedev
- learn Android dev
- finish framework (or at least make reasonable progress)
- create scripting language

We'll see what else comes to my mind during the year

Well fuck you too Swift! Your mother is to complex to be solve in reasonable time!

Start-ups and corporations trying new things be like:
"Why should we pay a developer or a company to develop this and this for us when we can just:
- start a competition.
- get free design mockups and code.
- decide which is better.
- reward a small prize and maybe some freebies to the competitors.
- profit. FREE CHEAP CODE AND DESIGNS!!!"

It might be the reasonable and logical thing to do from a business standpoint if its about code you need to rarely maintain..

But from an independent developer viewpoint - FUCK YOU AND THE SLOW ENSLAVEMENT OF MY SPECIE!!!

Applying for jobs

Apply for anything that looks like I have any kind of shot

Get reply from one company

"Hi. What is your salary expectation?"

"x"

Nothing for 6 days

Reach out again "Hi. I'm guessing you've gone with someone else as I've heard nothing back"

"No your salary expectation was a bit high"

"Okay well, what are you offering"

"47% of X as this is a junior position"

Like...
Firstly, X is what I was making at my last job
Secondly, you can see how much experience I have. You know I'm gonna be asking for 2-3 year money not intern money.
Thirdly, all they had to do after my first email was reply with "That's bit much, here's what we can offer, are you still interested?"

So yea, in general, I hate the salary expectation question. I don't want to sell myself short but I'm also currently in the take what I get position. So if you ask me, I'm gonna tell you what I was last making. I think that was a reasonable number and I know everyone has been hit by the pandemic so I'm not asking for more.

Just advertise jobs with a damn salary range.

You know which jobs do have a salary range? The senior positions. You know who does know how to negotiate? Seniors

This is a controversial topic and I tell you about this how I perceive it.

There are a lot of women in tech/IT groups with really interesting topics and discussions I'd like to join ... you know ... because I don't want to pay a lot of money to a course or read a book about it and be with the topic myself (or in online forums) ... I want to be in a cool offline community that shares the love about developing.

But I can't. Because they do not allow men. With the reason that women are not respected in tech/IT and therefore men are not allowed to join.

This is just racist and this policy makes no difference between them and those guys who really are just assholes. Even if I tried to discuss this, it was instantly shut down with "this is our rule and we do not discuss this" or "you just don't understand this". That is right. I can't understand it if I never get a reasonable explanation.

I can understand that they want to build a nice community but this is just a stupid limitation and a huge loss to get other perspectives of things.

In my studies and career I had never seen the problem where things escaleted that seperation was needed. If somebody feeled attacked about something, they said it and we stopped doing or changed it. It's not easy but it helps. Communication is key.

What is your opinion about it? Do you see it the way I see or can you help me see this from another perspective?

A friend of mine once buried an exception deep in some code that any reasonable programmer shouldn't ever come across that said "you're the worst person I know"

A few days later when a guy in our project was working on his awful patchwork of a database mapping he managed to somehow actually hit this exception. We all got a good laugh out of it!

Yeah, hiring people solely to write unit tests is a completely reasonable thing to do, i mean, its not like unit tests are a perfectly repetitive task that could easily be automated or anything...

*me quering a knowledge system for a pose and quaternion*
System: here is the quaternion in w x y z format
me: but for using it I need it in x y z w
System: not my problem
me: ok, fine. here is a function that flips this, np.

*months later*
me: wtf why does grasping don't work anymore? The poses look reasonable.
*after hours of trying to debug it*
*remembers hearing someone say something about finally using one standard for quaternions across the systems*
me: wait... could this be... *comments out flip function*
me: yep... that's it.
...
Overall, this is an improvement. But I lost several nerves and hours yesterday night wondering why my grasping doesn't work anymore. Feeling embarrassed, that I didn't finish my stuff in time because of this bug.
*sigh*
goddammit

Joined a new team at work 6 months ago. Immediately set upon by a useless PO who was somehow set in her ways while still being around 30 years old. Absolutely refused to change the broken team dynamic or processes in any way whatsoever. Made terrible tickets, never did refinement on tickets so they were always missing stuff and constantly blocked. Generally unlikeable and difficult to work with, incompetent at her job and resolutely refused to change literally anything to make the team function better.

She finally leaves after 6 months and the team dynamic changes immediately. Suddenly we are improving our processes, getting stakeholder input, refining tickets, taking reasonable amounts of work in a sprint. We have discussions without her butting in and getting frustrated when you bring up legitimate concerns. No longer do you have to tiptoe around and appease her ego if you want to point out the obvious flaws in the work she drew up or even just examine it from a technical perspective.

It's insane how much things can improve once you shed the dead weight of people that are just determined to be difficult and won't budge an inch to change their ways. Good riddance.

Creating an API is not too difficult. However, OAuth2.0 is a bitch. Who the hell thought this was reasonable?

Some "engineers" entire jobs seems to only consist of enforcing ridiculous bureaucracy in multinational companies.

I'm not going to get specific, the flow is basically:

- Developer that has to actually write code and build functionality gets given a task, engineer needs X to do it - a jenkins job, a small k8s cluster, etc.
- Developer needs to get permission from some highly placed "engineer" who hasn't touched a docker image or opened a PR in the last 2 years
- Sends concise documentation on what needs to be built, why X is needed, etc.

Now we enter the land of needless bureaucracy. Everything gets questioned by people who put near 0 effort into actually understanding why X is needed.

They are already so much more experienced than you - so why would they need to fucking read anything you send them.

They want to arrange public meetings where they can flaunt their "knowledge" and beat on whatever you're building publicly while they still have nearly 0 grasp of what it actually is.

I hold a strong suspicion that they use these meetings simply as a way to publicly show their "impact", as they'll always make sure enough important people are invited. X will 99% of the time get approved eventually anyway, and the people approving it just know the boxes are being ticked while still not understanding it.

Just sick of dealing with people like this. Engineers that don't code can be great, reasonable people. I've had brilliant Product Owners, Architects, etc. But some of them are a fucking nightmare to deal with.

<rant>
I fucking HATE the Arduino environment right now.

First of all: you can't fucking put your project files in a sub folder to the main file. I can't write #include "src/motor.hpp" because it doesn't fucking know what that means.
Turns out you have to put all your header files in the fucking library folder common for all Arduino projects!

Secondly, you can't call your cpp headers hpp, they HAVE to be called h, or the Arduino environment throws a fit and begins whining about being unable to find the fucking files.
Not just that! You can't reference other Arduino libraries from within your library because the environment doesn't know what that means either.
To get around that you need to fucking include the library in your main file, AND THEN you can include it in the library file that uses it. After all, it should be the programmer's job to soon feed a so called IDE, right?

I'M SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS SHIT! 😤

I'm ready to either program the Arduino directly with an AVR programmer or even port the entire project to the raspberry pi where I have a proper fucking Linux environment with a proper fucking directory structure so I can code proper fucking C++.
Hell I'm even fucking willing to spend all weekend porting all the code myself if necessary.

It's not reasonable that correct fucking C++ code is invalidated because I called the files something "wrong" and put them in the "wrong" directory.
</rant>

"user friendly project board" my ass

While I prefer tabs over spaces for indentation, I usually don't mind using spaces as this is often decided project-wide(or even company-wide) by powers out of my reach and the people also normally decide to intend by the reasonable 4 spaces.
However, now I am working on a project with 2 spaces indentation and oh boy, what a pain it is to write any nested code.. am I really the only one with this problem?

I find it hilarious the total misconception of hacking that the general public has. I tell people I know cyber security (Not as much as a lot of people around here) but it is a hobby of mine and I find it very useful/interesting.

But I can't stop but laugh when someone is like, can you get all the text messages my bf receives?

Can you hack this for me can you back that?

C'mon even if I knew how to do that without being caught you think I would even admit that to you. Do hackers just walk around with an index card pasted to their forehead of their skill? It's not even slightly reasonable to think this lol even for someone who doesn't know about the field

sure.... That seems a reasonable arrangement of Gibberish =_=

UE4 to UE5 migration is not going smoothly. Particularly, UE5 likes to break physics. So now I have to deal with jittery objects that sometimes shoot themselves across the room.

... The reasonable explanation is that the env is haunted. 👀👻

I really do wonder at what point the previous developer on this project thought 800 line functions are totally reasonable and standard practice...

I don't judge whoever wrote this line in one of the projects I've been working on

return 0.ToString()

Like, really, there has to be a LOGICAL, and REASONABLE explanation behind it, right?... RIGHT?!

Alright, I need suggestions. I live in a small town and outside of my primary job, I own my own IT business. A lot of (l)users have eagerly asking if I’ll be teaching classes to explain some of the key things a computer is capable of doing. (Most of them will be elderly.)

How much would you charge for this? I’ve got about 20 people confirmed and I was thinking about doing 20$ a head. What seems reasonable? Keep in mind, this is a smaller sized town.

BielyApp, yeah, GOOOOOOOOD IDEA! I still can‘t understand how this works or why did a reasonable human being though that this would be a great idea! 🤔

Ok. There‘s a community that lives 4 or 5 hours from my my city. I don‘t want to offend anybody, so let‘s call them “Bielys” (just a random name, I don’t know if there’s actually a group or etnia with that name).
Bielys live isolated from modernity, they speak their own language and they don’t use technology.

A dev friend of mine was having a hard time (he got divorced and was almost in bankrupt). One day, a man asked him and another dev to work on a mobile app:

...

“BielyApp”.

...

It was supposed to be a movile app for commerce. Bielys could sell and buy biely stuff from another bielys. Well, at this point you can figure out why this was a bad idea. Anyway, they developed it. Even it’s on GooglePlay and AppStore 😱 I installed it to see if it was truth or not. Incredibly it was true. BielyApp exists and the worst thing is that you can log in with your facebook account. WTF?!

I asked to him “But why?! WHY?! They don’t even use smartphones!!!!”
And he answered “I know, but I needed the money”

Another oldie - apologies if it has been done before.
So there were these two developers in a light aircraft looking to land, but they were completely fog bound and had no clue where they were (I said it was an oldie - no GPS).
So they flew around for a while, getting lower and lower hoping to see a landmark, when they flew past this office building.
As they went by, they saw a single light on in one of the windows, so they flew around again and attracted the guy's attention.
On the next loop around, the pilot shouted "WHERE ARE WE?"
Then on the next loop around, the guy in the office shouted back "YOU'RE IN AN AIRPLANE".
They looped around again, and the pilot shouted "THANKS!" and set course south west for 15 miles and made a perfect touchdown at Seattle airport.
Hi passenger looked at him and said "How did you do that??"
He said "Quite simple really. I asked that guy a perfectly reasonable question, and got an answer that was 100% correct, but totally useless, so I deduced that must be Microsoft, and I knew that the airport is 15 miles to the south west"

So, I work in a game development studio, right?
We're trying to launch the title on as many platforms as reasonable, because as a social VR app we're kinda rowing upstream.
So far, Steam and Oculus have been fairly reasonable, if oddly broken and inconsistent.
Enter store 3.
Basically no in-game transaction support (our asking prompted them to *start* developing it. No, it's not very complete). No patch-update system (You want an update? Gotta download the whole fsckin' thing!). No beta-testing functionality for most of their stuff ("Just write the code like the example, it will work, trust us!"). No tools besides the buggy SDK (Wanna upload that new build? Say hello to this page in your web browser!).
So, in other words: Fun.

We've been trying to get actively launched for two months now. Keep in mind that the build has been up on Steam and Oculus for over a year and half a year (respectively), so the actual binary functionality is, presumably fine.

The best feedback we get back tends to be "Well, when we click the Launch button it crashes, so fail."
Meanwhile we're going back and forth, dealing with other-side-of-the-world timezone lag, trying to figure out what is so different from their machines as ours. Eventually we get them to start sending logs (and no, Windows Event logs are not sufficient for GAMES, where did you even get that idea????) except the logs indicate that the program is getting killed so terribly that the engine's built-in crash handler can't even kick in to generate memory dumps or even know it died.

All this boils down to today, where I get a screenshot of their latest attempt.

I just can't even right now.

I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.

And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.

Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.

Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.

No, neither of those broke me.

The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...

WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS

I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL

IS IT TO MUCH ?????

FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS

FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.

AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS

AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??

GO TO HELL MICROSOFT

I WANT MY LINUX BACK

greetings from windscribe vpn!

finally a free private vpn that gives you a reasonable amount of data

❤️ privacy

Boss: How long will it take to finish the project?

Me: (Gives date for finishing dev and deployment.)

Boss: great, sound reasonable.

Me: ...

Boss: wait. Aren't you on vacation the two weeks after that.

Me: jup.

Boss: yeah we are not doing that again. Client can wait another two weeks.

Before someone says no Boss/PM is like that, he was/is a developer too so discussing deadlines and efforts is usually pretty relaxed since he knows our codebase and how long it takes to do things.

Was helping an intern with testing and he was trying to hit a specific branch in the code and just couldn't get there. Spent probably 20 minutes trying to figure out what the hell was going on since by all reasonable logic the code should run. Getting other developers involved trying to figure out what the hell was going on. Then discovering he was using a stub of the class with the method we were trying to reach overwritten to simply return null. Pretty much just wanted to go on a walk at that point.

After reading some rants abut stupid project managers I remembered this situation that happened to me a decade ago.
One of the tasks was to move some html component to different place on the page. The whole page was a mix trs and tds and to achieve that I had to rewrite the whole page structure. I estimated around half a day to complete that task. It was my first job and I was not great back then, but still it was reasonable amount for this task.

Now lets introduce my PM : the guy was a complete tool. He was a former hardware store manager ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and had no idea what we were doing.
He started ranting how on earth such simple task can takes so much time. I started explaining myself, but he wasn't listening. Instead he started sharing his screen, he made a screenshot of the page, pasted it to the ms paint, cut the component, and moved it to desired place. Then he said : It took me like 10 sec to complete the task and I have no experience, maybe I will replace you?
I was speechless. I had no words and I just kept silence.
Then he said he would reassign this task to X, because he is competent.
X spend more then 4 hours and I heard no apologies.

Lua is one of the stupidest languages to ever exist.

Oh, the language is easy to learn? The syntax is friendly? There's only like negative 10 functions you ever need to know? Everything is a table?

EVERYTHING IS A TABLE?! WTF CARES? WHAT ABOUT NIL?!

The arrogance this language has is extraordinary, literally. No lang, except Lua, imposes such an opinionated dichotomy. Everything is a fucking table, or, it's nil. -- That's so fucking stupid.

And look, I get it, this lang (oh sorry, scripting language (?)) CAN be good and fun and whatever... the moment you start to do IO is the literal end of days.

Everything is nil. Except, if it's defined... then it's not nil. -- OK. That sounds sensible/reasonable enough. -- What if it's not defined? You get nil. What if it's not the right data? You get nil. Do I get errors/exceptions or whatever? No, absolutely not, you get nil... unless the application you're using with Lua with has a lib that handles that.

There are so many more issues I have with this lang, but honestly... Am I fucking missing something? Is this lang like actually super dooper awesome and I'm missing something? -- I can't not look at this language as just dumb and arrogant. -- It's literally a language where you have to manage and remember ALL conceivable state at ALL times.

Strap in...

- Previous employer
- 3rd party partner firm
- integration link between both over SOAP
- Both sides riddled with poor code and messed up political structures (partner firm CEO is an investor in my employer)
- Doing a deployment to update to https (I know)
- Keep http endpoint live
- Other side starts shitting itself
- Diagnose
- Not us
- feelsgoodman.tiff
- Get angry email
- Explain not us
- Back and forth
- Tell client it’s “irrelevant” on https issue, it’s their side that’s gone wrong
- Get angry reply with boss cc’d about how nothing is “irrelevant” for the client
- We all had to have a make up meeting and meal
- Client was calm and reasonable, all agreed we just snapped and it wouldn’t happen again
- 2 weeks later
- Their system shits itself again and suddenly we’re on the hook
- BA on my team (smarmy little bastard) constantly fucking me off
- Get so close to actually screaming and hitting him

So yeah. I don’t tend to hold that a job is more important to me than my dignity.

I have and will never hold my tongue for the sake of a job, I’m not gonna put up with people shouting / belittling / backstabbing etc.

At a previous job, boss & owner of company would waste hours of my time to show me, at his own desk, every small detail of some random feature he had fallen in love with on some random webpage he found, while saying "I don't want to disrupt your plans or anything, this is just something to keep in the back of your minds, as this would be a really nice thing to have, even tho none of the clients have asked for this and I have asked no one else for a second opinion, and I will most likely ask you to remove this feature in the future because I will finally have realized it wasn't that good an idea anyway."

Ok dipshit, what the fuck are we supposed to do with this information? Every week from this moment on you will ask whether we have found the time to implement this feature, even though you are fully aware that our schedule has no room for random, unplanned features and that we are already not able to meet the unreasonable deadline you pulled out of your ass two weeks into a development process that would end up taking 8+ months.

We are already overworked, we already work hours upon hours of unpaid overtime, and yet you still think it reasonable to pull us away from our work every other fucking day to talk about random extra features you want added, but don't want added to the roadmap because you want no delays... Fuck you, fuck your toxic attitude, fuck your meetings where you spend half an hour complaining about features we are still in the process of developing the backend functionality for (on test servers) not having the right font colour for the text, and fuck your legacy desktop software originally written in COBOL that you now want moved to "the cloud".

I would rather be unemployed and live as a hobo on the streets with a "will code for food" sign than work for you ever again.

Fuck pep8 in general. Fuck harder anything to do with line limits. Fuck with a rusty spatula those who tie it into their git precommits or CI tests.

What's that, it's 2018 and even the shittiest walmart-tier computers have 1080p OR BETTER at a 16:9 aspect ratio?

"lol, 80 character line limit."

Eat a bucket of rancid dicks.

Oh, and since we're forcing you to be so economical with your characters, we're going to force four space tabs. Yknow, rather than simple single tab characters, which could mean everyone can set their preferred level of spacing without bloating the code with whitespace.

Because, yknow, it's entirely reasonable to chew up 1/8 of a line because you're editing a function inside a class definition. God Almighty forbid you try to do a for loop inside that function! Fuck you!

"Oh but you can't have two editors or terminals open side by side without that limit!"

BULL FUCKING SHIT. Here's my shitty 1280x1024 display on my shitty computer with two Sublime editors open side by side. You'll notice the break is at 100 characters. You'll notice I don't have to scroll horizontally to do two things at once. You'll notice I even have room for COMMENTS!

If your code standards require you to make your code *less* readable and *less* clear and take up *more* space to accomplish the same tasks, YOUR CODE STANDARDS SUCK!

Enough with this stupid meme. We're not in the 80s anymore and it's high time to start fucking acting like it.

I'm a fan of Linux, and have used many distros (arch, ubuntu, debian, fedora, mint, centos, rhl) and many desktop environments (KDE, Gnome, Cinnamon, xfce, Enlightenment) before asking this question.

But every single one of these desktop environments always have felt slow to respond in some cases, where I click something and it doesn't open/close immediately, or i double click something but it fails to open or select something. basically I'm not confident my actions on the GUI will have guaranteed, quick responses within reasonable time. I've never ever had this issue with Microsoft OSes (keeping aside the many badly coded softwares which hang or crash). I'm not talking about specific softwares, this is just general usage of opening settings and using the file manager, window menus.

I'm pretty sure my hardware is not the issue. I've run everything on the same rig. And this has always kept me from fully committing myself to a Linux distro. But I can never be sure about display drivers, as they're not identical. But the issues in Linux has been noted by me for many years. So I doubt it's the drivers either.

Is there anybody who agrees with me and know why Linux is the way it is like that, or is this just me facing this annoyance?

Haven't ranted in a while so here it goes.

Head of product took me (senior dev) to a high value client workshop/demo session and over the course of two days found the reason behind why the dev team has been pushed to the limit as of late and sales/product team has been making promises to clients without checking with dev leaders on reasonable delivery dates on massive new features.

I tried my best to manage expectations by differing talking about delivery dates by saying "lets discuss that with the team" rather than giving out dates right now. But as soon as the meeting ends he sends an email to the client confirming delivery dates on features that we have done no research on or even specialize in!

Please tell me this is not how well established businesses work or is that the new reality of things. In either case I wanna find a new job :/

If you're finding your paid work boring & mediocre, then utilise the stability of your current job to be fussy over choosing your next one.

Shoot high, do research, apply only for places you think you'd genuinely enjoy working, and demand a good offer with any reasonable perks you choose.

You might take a few months to find somewhere, but you'll eventually land yourself somewhere where you really want to be.

If I find myself stuck for more than a reasonable time on a single bug, never plough on.

Get up, listen to some music, relax on your memory foam mattress, close your eyes and simply relax. Get back to your workstation and I always find myself solving it within seconds and wondering, "SHIT, WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT BEFORE"

And I find myself answering it's because I never took a break!

Slogging through half baked code, I wondered to myself... Who the fuck is Robert and where is he?

Quickly searching through Google and finding a handful of results I see that he had left long ago. Probably leaving for good reason. I'll never be able to ask him though. Never will I know why he left. He probably has a very sensible reason, but goddamn do I wish he left something that I could use to discern what he has created.

There is no documentation, no reasonable information about why anything was built the way it was, only just mountains of rusty ass baren code to scale down.

My boss just said “as long as it puts a smile on the clients face, it’s worth examining, within reason.” Yeaaa that’s a bit broad... Some of our clients only smile when they have hookers and blow on hand. Is it reasonable to help them acquire such if it helps retain them as a customer?!

First month of project we suggest that we test that Entity Framework has made reasonable DB queries because the system will need to handle a lot of records. “Not a priority in this sprint because we need features.” Devs try to get it into every sprint. The last week of the project they want us to dump in a ton of records so they can test it. The N+1 SELECT query issue is on main queries. It is so bad and slow with more records that a simple query causes the container management to auto scale the application on a single query. They can have max 8 users in the system at a time and it will take 10 seconds to do a simple page refresh.

They get on our case and we dredge up all of the correspondence where they completely ignored our advice. Fix it now! We need another sprint. Fix it free! No.

I’ve been a solo frontend developer for a couple of weeks now with critical enormous features and some bugs to get out the door by the end of next week.

On top of that, I got a backend bug to fix which is fine since I know the stack. The SQL that’s causing a bug is an obvious fix but as a FE dev I have no damn idea about DB structure.

I decide to setup local DB to see it for myself. So as a reasonable developer I look for docs to set it up since it sounds like quite a process after confirming with colleagues.

ANNNND... SURPRISE, the docs ARE NON EXISTENT unless you wanna call an outdated diagram a sufficient doc. Just so you understand the pain, we have 9 micro services, a weird db structure and only 5% is documented.

I requested help from my colleagues, but their answers were similar to docs with a follow up of “maybe you can document it after you set this up”. Barely stopped myself from asking “do I look like I have time for this crap? Why don’t you document it SINCE YOUR SETUP IS READY TO GO?”

So I’ve been at it for a couple of hours and I gave up. Will go back to frontend development since still a ton of shit to do anyway. Tomorrow I will attempt this again.

As a webmail user, I want to be logged out automatically without any reasonable reason, to be able to read your notice that I have forgotten to log out, once I log in again.

Sometimes human stupidity still surprises me.

Today I was able to stop the release of a ticket at the last moment that intended to put urls WITH A SECURITY TOKEN TO ACCESS USER DATA through a link shortener.
Some PM assumed that it would be a reasonable course of action to map an url secured via jwt through to a 4 character, countable, base64 string so that we don't have to send multiple sms if they contain this url. I can accept that the implications might slip through one person but the fact that this was put into a ticket by a pm, prioritized by PO, estimated by an entire team, implemented by a professional developer, reviewed by a senior and then scheduled for release without anyone asking themselves if there might be a reason for a security token to be long, that one shocks me.

I was asked to add full page takeover announcements to a website, even though there's a perfectly reasonable announcement system already in place.
I objected on religious grounds - doing that would undoubtedly get me sent to developer hell (also knows as COBOL).
But the client wasn't convinced so I made them a demo. I immediately got a message back saying "wow, that's a lot more annoying than I thought, please remove it".
Of course all of this was done in a separate branch, so this blasphemous code would never be in my master commit history.

!rant + !story

I hate every human on the planet that says WFH is just people pretending to work or are slackers looking for an easy way out.

Now the story bit.

In 2021, I joined a company (I really wish I could name-drop the company), where the micromanagement was OFF THE CHARTS.

The company got a client who pitched a product they wanted built and gave us a super reasonable 3 months to complete it. I was really happy about the timeline and kept working under keystroke monitoring, which I didn't really mind at the time.

3 days into the development, the client informed us that they are pulling the funding i.e. they don't have money to pay us.

So at that point the client gave us two choices:

1. Stop the development right away and get paid for the time that we put in already.
2. Finish the project under 9 days. We would still get paid for the 12 days total, mind you. Not the original budget set.

So the motherfucking boss chose the second option and then the chaos ensued.

Devs screaming at each other on calls/slack. The boss yelled at us all the time about the completion. It was wild.

I had to wake up at 7:30 AM and start coding and log off at 11 PM for literally the next 9 days including Saturday and Sunday. No holidays allowed for the timeline. This was all at a WFH job.

So fuck anyone that says WFH is easy and just for slackers.

Ummmm....guys? Anybody interested in programming mice? Is that even a thing? Is $5000 a reasonable level of compensation for such a task? I have so many questions

An example of bad documentation? Unity. It has a list of poorly described methods of deprecated classes. The only reasonable documentation is the community. Docommunitation.

!dev

The constant fight between my parents left me traumatized for years. In this lockdown I'm home, for almost after a year, same fight. I was speaking, I was calm. But my body was in a flight reaction, my legs were shivering violently my mind was calm though.
Now they are still fighting, it's as always very abusive, and now I'm just in my bed feeling a bit of just like what I used to feel during my childhood. I thought that things are fine in my family again, we can be reasonable now. We can cultivate good relationships finally but now, I feel the same I as used to do when I was 15, I want to leave. Leave this house. I want to be alone.

A new currency is emerging in our industry. It is called "blame".
Who is to blame if we don't meet the deadline?
Who is to blame if the rushed release has x bugs?
Who is to blame if nightly build breaks, because our CI-Server is an old hunk of junk and "management" didn't approve the upgrade?
Our customer blames the delay in HIS infrastructure on us, because our system requirements are too high.

Blame blame blame. This currency is the new idol of our management team. Everyone gets blamed. They manage their "blame" ledgers instead of approving the tools we need or give us reasonable deadlines. Why Lord, oh why are there SO MANY MORONS in managment? You know what, dear "managers"? FUCK YOU., FUCK YOU SO HARD YOUR MOM WON'T RECOGNIZE YOU. YOU COULDN'T POUR PISS OUT OF A BOOT WITH INSTRUCTIONS ON THE HEEL.

Here we are, three years later. Our system breaks down at the slightest load. An architecture is hardly recognizable anymore. The code consists of methods that have been refactored beyond recognition. The so-called architects came and went, leaving behind an ever-growing fiasco. Wrong decisions are concealed, criticism of them dismissed as ignorance. Our clients are on the verge of having us all killed. Daily crisis meetings are the norm. The remaining developers skulk around the unmaintainable code like emaciated ghosts. Everyone who has even the slightest chance to escape takes a parachute. Our dailies are made up of lies to cover up yesterday's lies. Our Mondays have become days of dread, because that's when the weekend disaster news has to be analyzed. Yet there are still developers who turn a blind eye. Who recommend this and that workaround in a good-humored tone. The code consists only of workarounds. Sarcasm has replaced any normal discussion. Reasonable suggestions on how to basically refactor the whole thing are rejected for cost reasons. In the process, our entire budget is eaten up by maintenance costs. Middle management should be put up against the wall. Why am I still here? This deceptive feeling that one could still turn the tide. This is eating me up.

To every fucking site with an .io domain:

Next time, hype a cheaper TLD...100$/year is just not reasonable...

Any JavaScript developers out there willing to help me out with something?

I have an interview question that I like to ask candidates that no one ever seems to get right. But, to me, it seems pretty basic, so I expect MOST JavaScript developers at almost any level of expertise to get it, and I like it generally because it demonstrates some core knowledge of JavaScript concepts and syntax.

But I want to verify that my feelings about it are reasonable, because give how few ever seem to get it right (and I'm talking across literally hundreds of interviews, MAYBE 2 people have ever gotten it right), I'm starting to wonder if I'm right or not.

Look at this code, and then answer the question after. Please do so off the top of your head and without testing anything since that's normally the experience a candidate would have. I'll give the answer after some time for anyone who gets it wrong but is curious.

But this isn't about YOU getting it right or not, and it's not about whether it's the best way to do something in JavaScript or anything like that, it's just about whether it's a reasonable question and whether my expectation that MOST JavaScript developers should get it right is fair.

const O = {
sayHello : function() { alert("Hello"); }
};
const S = "sayHello";

Question: using ONLY the variables O and S (and you MUST use both), write code that executes the sayHello function.

Thanks!

Whoever thought that using some crappy niche framework for selenium web driver based on node.js instead of using Python or Java bindings like every other reasonable person would do should be beaten to death with old keyboards.

Prequel to my previous post:

I received an offer from a startup that did not meet the originally advertised salary range. In every other aspect this place seemed like where I'd enjoy working the most and each previous interaction made a very good impression on me. So needless to say this was quite a shock.

They immediately apologised and explained the situation. They only now started to expand to and hire from my location (which can be verified) and I would be the very first person from this location (seems true too but I could only really verify this after joining). They explained the salary range I had seen was for their main hub location (accurate too) and said that the recruiter who posted the ad did not adjust it to mine. I asked why tf they didn't notify me of this earlier and they said they are super busy with everything, are new to location based salaries and normally don't check the recruiters posts as it should be her work.

Now, even if this is totally true, it was an awful sudden shock and felt a bit like a scam - totally contradicting my previous impressions.

Here are a couple of other points that I'll just sum to save time:
- before seeing the job ad I had a *reasonable* salary expectation even lower than their actual offering
- on the ad, the bottom end of their salary range far exceeded my reasonable exp.
- the relative level of my position would be even higher up the range that I have seen realised would be top 5%
- having had seen the ad, I started to have an *ideal* expectation being the bottom of the range
- in first interview I told them my exp. is the bottom end of their range +- a bit
- I told this to a dev guy who has no fucking idea about this stuff and I don't blame him but he noted this down to higher management
- generally I have not been very precise of my expectation as previously I only had lower class dev jobs, this would be the first decent.
- Hence I have seen an enormously high variation in salaries offered to me so this advertised range whilst high seemed possible

Now, with all this in mind I posted here a question about what some of you would do in my position.

I received the following group of responses:

- it's a scam, bad place, run
- it's an intentional (common) trick
- people make mistakes like this esp. startups so find out if this is intentional or not
- just decide if their current offering is reasonable for the position and location, ignore the rest
- just decide if the amount is enough
- location based salaries are retarded, don't work there (I kinda agree and also don't)
- if they can afford the higher pay in another place they should have no prob. meeting the range
- it's more important that you'd enjoy it there if the pay is sufficient for general needs
- company culture is generally more important these days
- fuck recruiters and hr people (amen to that btw)

Here is what I did:

Regardless of whether I believe them or not I hyperfocused on the potential scam/trick aspect.
I told them that every other interaction with them was positive and would love to join them but this was a really bad impression and feels like they are playing with me. I made up some bullshit previous examples of companies trying the same trick on me (which obv. never happened).

Then I said that I think to resolve this they should invite me to their main office for a day (all interviews had been online) and if after that they are still not ok to offer me at least the bottom of the adv. range then we can part ways. Otherwise this should ensure both of us that we are a good match, etc.

They seemed to love the idea and said that I should go there for x till y (3 days) and if we don't hate each other by the end I'll get the amount at the bottom of the range and they apologised again about it looking like a scam, etc.

So thanks a bunch again to those of you who provided valuable input.

TLDR: I need advice on reasonable salary expectations for sysadmin work in the rural United States.

I need some community advice. I’m the sysadmin at a small (35 employee) credit card processing company. I began as an intern and have now become their full time sysadmin/networking specialist. Since I was hired in January I have:

-migrated their 2007 Exchange server to Office 365

-Upgraded their ailing Windows server 2003 based architecture to 2012R2

-Licensed their unlicensed VMware ESXi servers (which they had already paid for license keys for!!!) and then upgraded them to 6.5 while preventing downtime on hosted VMs using tricky transfers and deployments (without vMotion!)

-Deployed a vCenter server to manage said ESXi servers easier

-Fixed a three month gap in their backups by implementing Veeam, and verifying its functionality

-Migrated a ‘no downtime’ fileserver to a new hypervisor host, implemented a ‘hot standby’ server as a backup kept up to date by the minute with DFS replication.

-Replaced failing hard drives in a RAID array underlying their one ‘business critical’ fileserver, which had no backups for 3 months at that time

-Reorganized Active Directory and Group Policy deployment from a nightmare spiderweb of OUs and duplicate policies

-Documented the entire old network and now the new one as I’ve been upgrading this

-Audited the developers AWS instances and removed redundant machines, optimized load balancing on front end Nginx servers, joined developer run Fedora workstations to the AD domain and implemented centralized syslog monitoring on them.

-Performed network scans and rewrote firewall exceptions to tighten security

There’s more, but you get the idea. I’ve now been tasked with taking point on an upcoming PCI audit which will be my first.

I’m being paid $16/hr US, with marginal health benefits. This is roughly $32,000 a year, before taxes.

I have two years previous work experience managing a third party Apple repair facility (SimplyMac) and every Apple certification for warranty repair and software troubleshooting. I have a two year degree in general sciences, with about 4 years of college credit (Two years of a physics education and two years of computer science after I switched focus) I’m actively pursuing a CCNA and MCSA server 2016 with exams paid for and scheduled.

I’m going into a salary negotiation in two months. What is a reasonable salary to request, from your perspective, for someone in my position?

Thanks in advance!

Sooo I’m typically a proponent of physical copy of books, as I’d rather sit and read them, write and take notes. Essentially all my books turn into something out of the “half blood prince” potions book from Harry Potter.

But it’s so inconvenient as either my books are in my office or in the library at home. It ends up being something like connecting a USB... the book I need at the time is always in the opposite place I am in currently.

Also, all the books I want now are newer and none are on the used market. For a reasonable price.

So I gave in a bought an iPad with the hopes of putting the books in pdf form on it... I’ll pay for some PDFs but hey if I can get it free thru a google search then it is what it is lol.

Not sure how I’m gonna adapt to reading on a tablet, as I really prefer a physical book.. hell I still use national brand computation notebooks for all my notes. Nothing beats writing it down, AND I still have an IBM selectric 3 and Swintec, nothing beats sitting down and just letting the thoughts flow neatly on a piece of paper and then glueing it the notebook

Anyway whatcha y’alls thoughts of using an iPad as a digital library of books.. using the Apple Pencil to annotate the book. I bought the 12.9 inch as the screen size is closest to a sheet of paper

Also, I don’t read fiction all the books I read are nonfiction, reference manuals, textbooks, data sheets, user manuals, stuff like the art of computer programming by knuth, Kent beck, Robert Martin, folwler books, etc

So these same mother fuckers that think 8:00 is reasonable time for a meeting, have decided that the health checks need tk be done by 7:00

But no, I must just be grateful to have work

Them: You have 6 days to build this frontend page for our wordpress site.
Me: Ok...
*proceeds to spend 4 days trying to arse my way towards a semi reasonable bootstrapped website based on the existing website's styling.*
Me: *Presents website*, so... uh... yeah, I don't usually do frontend stuff, I'm more of a backend dev, but here's what I could do.
Them: This looks like absolute horseshit.
Me: So what do you not like about it?
Them: All of it. It doesn't look anything like the wireframe that I gave you.
Me: Ok... So let me get this straight, you want it to look exactly like how you designed it in your wireframe? *wireframe looks like a child drew it*
Them: Yes! Is that so hard?
Me: I mean, it's a little hard. I'm not exactly a front end developer. Aside from that, I think this design is not very user-friendly.
Them: we don't care about your opinions, OP. Get back in there and make it look exactly like the wireframe.
Me: Ok.
*proceeds to go to fiverr, and contract someone else to do it for me while I get to do fun stuff in the back end.* 😂

----

We'll see what they think of the project when it gets back to me. Wish me luck guys.

Rant on me myself.

After being a professional coder (ie having a bachelor degree) for 11 years now, I finally have a decent and reasonable backup.

I use borg to backup to my raid 1, which is local, in my corridor near the ceiling. I use a Intel NUC with two external USB3 HDDs attatched. As I already had data on them, I went for a btrfs raid 1.

The second level of my backup solution is my brother. It's 50km to his flat. He's got a banana pi with my third HDD attached. I connect to his pi via VPN. The VPN is done via an AVM Fritz! Box. No ads, I just like those boxes (modem and router).
The backup is encrypted, of course.

Now, after ten years, I finally got a decent backup solution. Wow. This feels great! 😎

If anyone here remembers the first 2 part rant story I posted then you will know that I got unceremoniously laid off by a company that tried to blame me for their bad decissions at one point

Well, a couple of days ago I found out that the senior dev and the owner took a trip to San antonio tx in order to try and look for growth opportunities and more developers. The thing is, being a Mexican company they thought they could go away with half assed solutions and mexican pay charts (to them it is completely reasonable to pay a dev with a degree and experience close to 13.99 an hour) just to find out that shit like that does not fly with American professionals. After I left, no one would monitor their .net implementations , the lead developer being a new php developer himself and not knowing much about .net had to take care of much of the things they had to work with, their API made no sense and it was damn near impossible to connect their services to a mobile platform unless you had ninja like skills and ingenuity.

I hold no grudges and really wish them the best, but it pleases me to know that they know now that their way of doing things is not standard in the U.S. now that makes me happy.

While sorting through my downloads folder, I noticed the file size for the Atom setup program: 138MB. For a text editor, that's pretty ridiculous and makes its name quite ironic.

I have similar disdain for Piskel (pixel graphics editor) and Etcher (USB/SD card image writer). Though these are all useful programs, none of these ought to be anywhere near the sizes they are.

Meanwhile, Notepad++ weighs 3MB which is a lot more reasonable.

Ugh...

Best:
Got a role change to automation engineer, which is sort of a 'just fix problems' position, like with tooling, get rid of manual work, remove as many spreadsheet as we can.
I started looking into rust.

Worst:
People think we depend heavily in javascript because our products are extensions, our golden product is an extension, so a few members of my team insist in depending in our core team and use their javascript stuff, even for string parsing, even if we do have a python package that does rhe same thing that is officially maintained too.
I refuse.

The good again:
My boss let's me refuse, I am not forced into javascript, they let me use whatever I want as long as it is reasonable.

Weeks ago, a change went into production. For some reason, we can't implement our own changes or create new databases in production, we have to have a whole different department do it. This would be great except for one thing:

THEY CAN'T THINK FOR THEMSELVES. I've had to tell them how to run scripts I wrote. I've had to tell them how to fix problems that arise.

Back to that script ran three weeks ago or so. It didn't add permissions to allow me, the system and application developer to see the stored procedure, much less run it. Application can't run it. Thankfully the application works without it.

Fast forward to tonight. My change that I'm attempting to implement is the creation of the stored procedure, because nothing could see it, I assumed it didn't exist... reasonable, right? Database folks tells me it exists. They then tell me they can't give me nor the application permissions because it doesn't ask for it in the change plan.

Excuse me.... WHAT FUCKING WORLD DOES IT MAKE SENSE TO CREATE SOMETHING AND HIDE IT FROM THE CREATOR LET ALONE THE APPLICATION SO IT CAN'T USE IT?! FUCKING THINK. WHY WOULD I WASTE MY FUCKING TIME TO TALK TO YOU OFFSHORE PIECES OF SHIT AT 10PM WHEN I'D RATHER PLAY VIDEO GAMES.

I'm so fucking done with enterprises. Someone with reasonable job security at a startup, please hire me. You will probably pay me more fucking money than this company does anyway.

Now on to my second change of the night. Thankfully I don't have to rely on anyone outside of me... so I won't be wasting my fucking time.

Have you ever committed to an impossible deadline simply because your client would have been completely FUCKED if you didn't?

this would have been remotely doable if the existing code base that was handed over was just mildly reasonable. But how could this shit ever have worked the first time?!

Gilfoyle would just have said no. Why can't I be more like Gilfoyle >.<

Google's attempts to follow the iPhone just make me think, "Might as well get an iPhone."

I wish Google would create a high-end phone with grippy, durable case, replaceable two-day battery and SD card slot. Vanilla Android with latest updates. Bring it in at a reasonable price (which I'd hope would be possible if not trying to squeeze everything).

Given me a real alternative here. Don't try and lead with design. It's letting Apple choose the battlefield.

Ideas:

1. Scrape github

2. Attach feature size estimate (an abstract scale) as examples across many projects.

3. Use this as prompt/finetunning data.

4. Train and prompt on project descriptions relative to feature size and number of contributors/changes in the changelog.

5. Package and release a model that takes descriptions of ideas and generates reasonable estimates of time and manpower.

6. Optional, sell as an estimate service to corporate and make money introducing some sanity to the world for a change.

Well, this week was a week from hell. It was a short 3 day week, and all of my internal Customers, who are normally pretty reasonable, just all unloaded on me at the same time. "We need this now!" "Have you done this?" "Why didn't you do that?" "We need you to do this, because our migration takes place in 30 minutes." (first notice of the migration). And then to top everything off, I'm creating a rollback DDL, and I've spent a couple of hours pulling my hair out, because a set of columns that need rolled back aren't in Prod, so I can't roll them back, because my own DDL drops them, and broadcast my natural meltdown to the entire DevOps team, feeling like an utter jackass after I realize my mistake. And even at quitting time, they are still walking up, and texting, and emailing. Holy f**k, I'm only going to be gone four days, two of them weekend, and will be back. All of this while trying to sell my house and pack boxes and move to an apartment. Can I retire now? Looks at retirement account... Nope, I'll be working until I'm 95. Just shoot me already!

Focus stealing - it winds me up more than is probably reasonable.

I'm there, typing away in my text entry UI widget of choice, purposefully entering text to do some thing as expediently as possible and then... oh, well I'm not any more, am I?

No, because some other window has decided that it needs the keyboard focus for usually no reason whatsoever, other than poor programming manners. Sometimes the same app will keep stealing the focus - oi, mate, I was typing over here? Could you not get the current focus and see that I'm busy?

This happens in chrome's dev tools _a lot_ but dev tools needs a rant all of its own.

So just opened Twitter at work to see Dark souls remastered is a thing... Instantly though "here we go, a $100 rerelease capped at 30FPS on console, oh well still getting it", went to EB games and read the description for the Xbox edition, running at 60FPS and for $60 AUD.... Dear all AAA developers...

THIS IS HOW YOU DO A REMASTER!!!!

Up the frame rate to 60 if previously capped at 30, upgrade textures and charge a reasonable amount for it!

Well done Bandai!

A few minutes ago, I was going crazy over a bug caused due to data mutation in Rails.

Basically, user1 was creating a post record and it's stored in the database normally however, on page reload for a second user, user2, the post (that user1 created) was update to belong to user2. This is because, on page reloads, I was using `<<` method call to append user2 and user1 posts together! Apparently, `<<` not only mutates the array, it also performs a database update.

Kill me please!!

Also, data immutability seems a more reasonable feature in languages now.

Top do-over... I was extraordinary in biology and microbiology. For some reason, I still remember every little detail, everything that I was learning regarding it felt so natural and easy for me. My heart was pulling me to IT, in the end, I become an average, okayish IT guy, with reasonable programming, networking, and other IT skills, but I had to suffer the hell out of studying to reach here. I never was in love with biology, but damn, it frustrates the heck out of me that I'm so freaking good at it... So, my do-over would be to go all-in with Biology.

Not a rant but i got my first homelab server this week :D

Looking forward to playing with it. Already installed esxi,and openvpn.

:dell poweredge t130 with 16 gb ram i found for a reasonable price.

So someone from another team in the company asked on our public Slack channel if they can send a field they're sending for one client, for all clients, so they don't have to have a branch for that one client that sends it.
We're talking about a string of up to 20 chars, typically much less even connected to each record, of which we have let's say a million per month and each of those records has at least 30 columns, some of them being longer strings even.

A dev from my team responded that they shouldn't send it because, while no one uses it so it's not going to break anything, it will require extra storage.

This was not 20 years ago, this was today, in 2021.

I responded asking what storage does he foresee to be the problem, because I can't see where so I'd like to get more details.

Guess who got ripped to shreds because it's a bad thing to question members of the team in public....

This is just one in a long line of similar brainless idiocies I've had to deal with from this asshole.

And no, I'm not a junior dev or something, I'm transitioning out of the Principal Engineer role for that team (for this reason exactly, otherwise I'd stay as PE). And no, I'm not the transitioning the role to that asshole.

At least 3 people who have left the team because of this asshole.

Managers not helping either, responses like "Yeah, you're right, but you're reasonable, he isn't, so let's appease him until we can find a way to deal with him"...

I used to love being a developer, this asshole made me want to vomit at any mention of anything remotely dev related...

Hope y'all are reasonably happy with your jobs and, more importantly, don't have such an asshole around you!

Why the hell does every manager I end up with think estimates are a reasonable thing to expect?!

it's been a while since my last rant and coming back after so long made me realize how much I missed here.

at some point i realized that the career I wanted and my current situation wouldn't match, I decided to go in real hard, I moved into the dreaded backend development (you can guess, node and mongodb),

I isolated myself from almost everyone and everything, cleared out my mobile games, social media and for almost two months I wanted something stable(might not be job ready but it had to be reasonable). I have come to love backend development so much, the joy of not having anything to do with css.

dad fought me, mum cried, probably thought I was slipping into some deep end, quitting school in my second year of studying food science(still dont know how I accepted that course lol) to start afresh didn't help matters. really hard decisions, made money on some little freelancing gigs, wasnt constant, I needed something stable and that was a job and a degree to get me one.

nothing special, just some regular hustler hoping his passion will pay him, I have always loved what i do but I need something to keep me going.

I have a web app that is currently running on a production server with no issues, but at the same time, it isn't working on my machine which I used to write, test, and deploy the app. The thing is, I haven't touched the code for a full month.

Now, I know this has to be logical and that there must be an reasonable explanation for all of this that I do not know yet.

However, and out of frustration, my mind wants to believe that there's some sorcery involved here or that a cosmic ray has actually penetrated the machine and messed its registers.

Damn the cosmic ray!

Redux is weird, and I don't like it because it violates the most basic principles of responsibility. The concept of expressing state changes as reducers is nice because it can be duplicated, saved and restored and compared for equality. So is creating isolated accessors and selectors. However, I really don't think a reducer should be aware of its own position in the hierarchy. When specifying an action you aren't addressing a reducer, you're addressing the tree. That the tree doesn't manage this addressing and expects reducers to identify themselves is a bit strange, especially considering that the whole point of having a tree is that reducers shouldn't be affected by their position in that tree because they're pure. Same goes for selectors, they should belong to the tree, not to any particular sub-reducer. Separating the slices is reasonable structure, but if you specify parts of the addressing in the slice and parts of it in the root you might as well just use separate reducers for each of your slices. It's functionally equivalent.

So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:

"Does minified javascript improve performance?"

This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:

"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]

Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]

It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]

So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"

So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...

I need you guys' help.
As mentioned earlier in one of my rants, I trade stocks part time, make a little money. But I am too tired from my full time work. So it is badly affecting my health. My broker is providing us with an API and docs at a monthly fee to develop software to automate trades.
I posted a job on Upwork, a few freelancers bid but their price was way beyond my budget.
Hence I decided to take up programming.

I was initially inclined towards C#, but seeing as how complex it is, I was thinking of going for python. Do you think it is a reasonable decision?

fucking permissions

I wrote a whole custom node js project because an exec wanted to see this tool work a certain way, I’m an iOS dev but I got it done the day he asked, and when I went to push it I realized I didn’t have the right account permissions. This service has “add-on roles” for accounts and I’ve had to ask for them before, so I went to that guy and he never responded. Then he went on vacation.

This morning I mentioned it in standup and my lead recommended I reach out to his boss, which sounded great bc we have an even better rapport than I do with the other guy.

His boss first said “that sounds reasonable” and then proceeded to TALK HIMSELF OUT OF IT and tell me to either find someone else to upload it for me or sit on it til the other guy gets back from vacation.

Does this ever end? Bc I used to chalk it up to first-year dev probs but we’re coming up on 5 years now and I don’t know what I did to deserve this torture

This was initially a reply to a rant about politics ruining the industry. Most of it is subjective, but this is how I see the situation.

It's not gonna ruin the industry. It's gonna corrupt it completely and fatally, and it will continue developing as a toxic sticky goo of selfishness and a mandatory lack of security until it chokes itself.

Because if something can get corrupted, it will get corrupted. The only way for us as a species to make IT into a worthy industry is to screw it up countless times over the course of a hundred years until it's as stable and reliable as it can possibly be and there are as many paradigms and individually reasonable standards as there can possibly be.

Look around, see the ridiculus amount of stupid javascript frameworks, most of which is just shitcode upon vulnerabilities upon untested dependencies. Does this look to you like an uncorrupted industry?

The entire tech is rotting from the hundreds of thousands of lines of proprietary firmware and drivers through the overgrown startup scene to fucking Node.js, and how technologies created just a few decades ago are unacceptable from a security standpoint. Check your drivers and firmware if you can, I bet you can't even see the build dates of most firmware you run. You can't even know if it was built after any vulnerability regarding that specific microcontroller or whatever.

Would something like this work in chemical engineering? Hell no! This is how fucking garage meth labs work, not factories or research labs. You don't fucking sell people things without mandatory independent testing. That's how a proper industry works. Not today's IT.

Of course it's gonna go down in flames. Greed had corrupted the industry, and there's nothing to be done about it now but working as much as we can, because the faster we move the sooner we'll get stuck and the sooner we can start over on a more reasonable foundation.

Or rely on layers of abstraction and expect our code to be compilable on anything the future holds for us.

I’m getting good at cooking. The fucking marvel that salt does when I leave salted chicken for a few hours or overnight is something else.
It feels that this already made anything I make around 50% tastier. The hard part is keeping it to a very low minimum to have a reasonable amount of sodium. The other day I had some thin chicken breast slices that were left salted for a few hours, then I cooked them in unsalted butter with a modest amount of pepper and herbs.

And I’ve just read a few pages of the damn book, I’m so excited for the rest.

This goddamn obtuse motherfucker at this discord of this framework I'm trying to learn, who happens to be a mod.

I'm trying to explain my scenario to this guy (a very reasonable one in my opinion) but this motherfucker is giving me some sass saying I'm confused at very basic things or saying shit like "it's literally that simple", well ain't that a bitch.

He's doing half assed reading, and apparently he's alt tabbing to a videogame (as displayed by discord), so I guess he's not paying attention and reducing me to an idiot.

What am I supposed to do? Call him out and get banned?

No, I have to fucking shut up and stomach this idiot because I need to learn.

If you don't have much patience, you just can't be a mod and also respond to people. Just pick one.

Because people can't fucking call you out when you're being a douche.

Fuck this guy.

Hey, here's an idea. Ethical cryptocurrency mining Adblock.

We've been talking a lot about mining as a revenue source and its ethics here, so that gave me an idea.

I've seen a lot of talk about blocking or boycotting mining websites.
Adblock has the "ethical ads" thing to allow reasonable ads to be displayed.

What if we made the mining equivalent of that: an extension that the user allows to mine with x resources, that prevents websites from doing their own mining, but which redistributes its mining results.

The website could just add a bit of script to tell the extension who they are, and while the page is on the foreground or streaming content, the extension would mine on their behalf.

This could also allow more transparency for the user: "your computer has generated x money for website y".

Wouldn't that be a nice middle ground? Does anyone know of a project like that?

So, might be the first time ever but I have a reasonable client. Oh wait, life isn't that nice!
Boss, stop picking fights over stupid shit with the client!
Boss, actually show up to meetings you called!
Boss, do you want to get us fired from the contract?
Boss, stop threatening the client! They hold all the chips here!
Boss, actually listen to my technical advice since you are not technical!
Boss, go die in a hole!
Boss, I want your job and paycheck you do nothing!
Boss, don't tell me you are tired and we can talk tomorrow when you kept me up until 3am the previous night then called an 8am meeting!
Boss, give everybody, including the client, more than 2 hours notice for a meeting, then get pissed when the client doesnt show. They have other meetings!

I've actually really enjoyed getting to interview people. Mostly because I'm given the freedom to ask reasonable questions. At this point, my favorite is asking fresh grads to come up with requirements to make their favorite portfolio bit production-ready.

I want a list of things you need to fix because they're duct tape and bubblegum, but a lot of people sit there with passwords in plaintext and suggest new features.

I need an opinion.

I want to learn something new. I consider myself a non-stupid person, and I am quite embarassed by the fact that the only tool I know well is Js+friends.

My options are:
- Java because money
- C/C++ because smartass
- Rust because yes
- some new shiny obscure shit like nim/zig/hare because lol

Currebtly I need money tbh. Java would seem a reasonable option, yet I'm scared by its huge ecosystem and I'm afraid that it would seriously take too long (like MANY years) to be confident enough to get a job.

Also, despite the common memes and crap, I fucking like Java.

I forgot about October...

Now those November deadlines look more reasonable.

I realized because I was checking when is get my mail-in ballot and apparently it needs to be returned by Nov 3. And well today is Sep 17...

It also recommended sending it back 2wks before which would be like now.

So I had a melt down like wtf, I didn't get it yet!!!

And then well... Yea...

So here I work with this colleague that , at first , had a reasonable résumé. Whatever.

Time goed by and he is just doing tickets, clicking left and right, the usual grind of a shitty monitoring system which I am working intensely on deprecating that shit. Anyhoo

The last few days it became apparent that his resume was basically a hot air cake and he knows basically nothing intrinsically.
As I have stated before in previous rants, "everyone was a noob once"... But this guy...

He wants to do "something with Ansible"... "Ok what do you want to do?" , I asked (and I regret to have asked).
He basically wants to write new files on targets. Easy enough, I show him how he could do it with playbooks, inventory and role just for demonstrating the entire chain.

This guy chanes everything up, thereby breaking host group assignment, he launchea it on ALL machines...

Luckily it's a harmless file, so dodged a bullet there.

But the real wtf ia that he did it with the root account for our systems, without understanding the difference between "authentication" and "authorization"...

I am now explaining him what the difference is and how he can be able to check it. I give him the commands literally! ( sudo -l -U <user>)

Manages to fucking open up each sudoer file in vim , mistype or whatever he did in an attempt to leave vim... Breaks sudo...

Now he tries to spin it in such a way that I have steered him to break things.

"Dude you just fucking failed a copy/paste and you did absolutely fuckall without understanding what you are doing, then splurge out accusations because you did it wrong!"

FML

Ugh... some people...

Just left the office early because of the toxic climate. That one infamous collegue is basically unable to communicate without being a narcissistic 5-year-old and was arguing whether we should write a test (I was going to write the test) that would need a single additional branch in the build system.

(The test was for a parser and it should test whether it can handle absolute paths. A simple regression test with a file and an expected output. Because absolute paths are different for every platform and user, the files to be parsed would have to be generated with appropriate paths before the tests were run. Well that would require one single python script and a single line in the script that runs the script and DONE)

Well that guy was unable to focus on his own work and started an argument about whether that test was necessary.
Even though I still think it is necessary, it might have been a reasonable argument if he would have acted more agreeable. But he was saying the feature was useless anyways "everyone will use relative paths only anyways" and "because noone here cares a ratass about maintaining the tests it will all fall on me again" ..

Wtf was this guys problem, I (CAPS) was going to write the stupid test and since when do we not write tests in order to better maintain our product? I get that he worries that the test environment will get more messy, but thats better than having the product code go messy or unfunctional! And c'mon guys, how are absolute paths a redundant feature...

Why does my brain sabotage me? I have a weird dream that wakes me up and now I’m awake at 3am and can’t go back to sleep. I went to bed at a reasonable time because I was dead tired and this is the thanks I get?

Don't even say your initial time estimate/guess out loud. It will probably become your deadline, and you probably assumed that most things would take a reasonable amout of time.

Bonus: Try to get onto projects that you think you can get interested in. Once on a project try to keep interested in it's success.

The statement below is correct.
Say what has happened:

196 + 245 = 981

By always striving to do better each time. Making code less sloppy every time I write GL code. Better performance everytime I write an algorithm. Lower memory usage every time I write application state. Learning a new trick for an old problem, one at a time.

Learning best practice in one go is impossible, but taking it a bit at a time makes things more reasonable.

Woo hoo, how I just love having to develop an extension to a system that the company bought 😍
Especially when there is an API that is completely undocumented, not even mentioned on their site 😍
Even more when it's a feature you expected to be there when you bought the system, because it's a reasonable thing to expect 😍

Fucking Ubiquity Unifi Video 😭

I really, really need some help here.

We have a service provider that is utter shit. Due to their shittyness we have a server to which our customers point their domains and then we forward the request to our shitty provider. This worked well until our provider blocked our server's IP.

They can't come up with a reasonable explanation as to why it's happening, and even though they've whitelisted our IP it keeps happening. I've tried changing the server's IP, but it takes 5 minutes and we're blocked again. Probably some traffic that they deem fishy.

Does anyone have any good or bad idea on how to work around this fuckery? The server at our provider is running PHP, so I'm thinking if I can set up some sketchy tunnel or something, but even then it might be caught on a lower level.

I'm really, really grateful for any ideas or advice. Even of the shitty kind.

Random opinion question:

I'm working on a thing where the user provides a big CSV and we process it and put it in the database, or update existing records.

This data impacts other things, but the data isn't front and center as a group of n the application for them to notice / see again (well they can query for it).

I'm thinking of taking the CSV and then presenting them with a table showing how we processed that data giving them a chance to review it before they commit it to the database...

I like this idea for two reasons:

1. If something goes sideways there's a chance someone will see it and I'm not sure I can do enough validation on a big ass CSV from god knows where to be sure we're going to process it right... (I'm going to do some validation but just can't cover it all)

2. It takes some of the mystery out of what happened / is happening for the user for.

Anyone try this in the past? Seems reasonable, but lots of things do before they go sideways.

Seems reasonable

Wanted to jump back into UB Ports after my old Nexus 5 decided to leak battery acid everywhere .-.

Thought I would try and find another Nexus 5, apparently the only functional ones are going to cost me $300 AUD, that's a no go...

Ok let's look for a one plus one, better hardware and may be better to find anyway, nope not a single one plus one online....

Short things short, if anyone can find either of these phones for reasonable prices (AUD) you know who to contact .-.

(I've been searching for 2 hours now and have nothing)

Just got an email from HR asking everyone to put in leave for Christmas by TODAY.
Christmas is like a month away...
Before this email, there is no similar announcement whatsoever informing we have to put in leave by certain date.
It's lucky I checked my email (because I basically ignore it unless someone comes and tells me he's gonna send me something through it). It's luckier I got my Christmas plan sorted.
But... What if I'm still figuring out what to do for Christmas? Is this reasonable?

was working on a project once where we needed a database mapping to some c# code
tasked one of our less experienced guys on it to maybe give him some experience

now I'm assuming most people here who have worked in .NET for a reasonable amount of time know about entity framework, and I did tell the guy about it.

three days after giving him that task he comes up to me smiling and says he's done

great! what did he do? he wrote the database mapping from scratch using hard coded SQL queries using lists to chain queries together in a sea of if-else statements...

let's just say the code broke down and needed last minute fixing when it was time to present it

DAILY LARAVEL PROBLEMS

I need to parse a JWT with some custom claims. There's a JWT library with Laravel; documentation really lacking, kinda hardcoded to work with Laravel but whatever; it's already installed, let's see what can I do with it.

It turns out I can't say something like "take this token, parse it, tell me it's valid". Let's see how that goes.
You need to build a parsing class with a manager, some auth stuff, a parser.
To build said manager you need a provider that implements a contract, a blacklist, a factory (of what?)
To build the factory (of what?) you need a claim factory and a payload validator
To build the claim factory you need a request
To build the blacklist you need a Storage
To build the storage you need a CacheContract
To build a CacheContract you need IDK it's a mess
To build the contract you need... IDK for real

WHY LARAVEL IS SHIT: 'cause only in this framework it seems reasonable to build this clusterfuck to parse a base64 encoded string, throw some json_decode and check a signature. And have it work only to authenticate a user.

What do you guys think is a reasonable budget for a high end Pc?

Does anyone else find it strange that the stupidest people in the company are making all the decisions.

In order to be able to engineer software you have to understand everything that the product owner knows, the business analyst knows, the product manager knows + how to actually make the system both work in a reasonable time frame and be maintainable long-term.

But we're not the one making the decisions. The irony of it is something that I can't get beyond.

And when I do go out on a limb to point out a logical inconsistency to UX or product... They don't thank me for it they hate me for it and then 3 days later figure out that they should be doing it and quietly follow my suggestions.

Seriously is the goal here to create good software or to avoid stepping on everyone else's toes in the company who is overwhelmed by the complexity of the project.

I think companies based on a hierarchy of non-technical people controlling technical people, in the creation of software products are a dying breed.

When it comes to creating software products everyone in the hierarchy should be technically minded.

I've seriously been trying to come up with an alternative perspective here.

The executives of the company are completely out of touch and the only thing which looks like progress to them in a sprint review is something visual on the front end.

The technical architect, the product owner and the product manager all seem to be engaged in keeping the executives happy and managing their expectations. By means of obscuring the truth.

Imagine how much more cost-effective building a software product would be if the executives were engineers themselves.

I'm keen to do an experiment and build a company comprised of engineers only.

Obviously they need to have insight into the other roles. But none of these other roles are as complex as implementation itself.

So why exactly are we the slaves of these well-meaning under thinkers?

My job is decent, but now I've got one developer who's been there a few months longer than me who pushes back on stuff that's considered standard, good practice.

We have a domain with lots of business rules. He's opposed to any sort of domain-centric architecture that puts business logic in one place. He doesn't give any coherent reasons. He can't describe his alternative clearly. He just wants to put stuff all over the place.

If I don't cite any references he says it's just my opinion. If I do, I'm talking down to him.

Then he decided that the database shouldn't have concurrency checks. His reasoning is that as the application grows we'll have more and more concurrent updates, and they all have to succeed.

What if that corrupts our data? He mentions "eventual consistency." which has nothing to do with what we're talking about.

The idea that our code should carefully ensure that our data is correct is "extreme." What are we going to tell people when bugs happen? That expecting the application to work correctly is extreme?

He's not a terrible developer. He's an advanced Expert Beginner. He's convinced himself that whatever he doesn't already know isn't worth knowing. That's fine if he wants to stop learning, but this affects the whole team. He makes such a fuss that it everyone gets stressed out and eventually I have to back off.

The problem is that someone with a reasonable degree of competence can pass off his experience as superior to all knowledge from outside sources.

I've been doing this as long as him. I don't claim to be a rock star genius, but I do keep learning. I don't tell myself that I've reached the pinnacle. But all of that learning goes to waste if I can't use it.

Interesting...

On Friday, I was playing with the ChatGPT integration in DBeaver. I was using the DBeaver sample SQLite database. This database has a couple of tables, among them Album and Artist, where Album has a foreign key into Artist.

So, I asked it:

"give me a query that lists all albums from artists who's name starts with s"

The query I got back was:

SELECT * FROM Album

Uhh, okay.

But then, I noticed that I wrote "who's" instead of 'whose', which would be proper grammatically. So, I changed that, and then I got this query:

SELECT * FROM Album WHERE ArtistId IN (SELECT ArtistId FROM Artist WHERE Name LIKE 'S%');

Hooray, that works! I'm not sure it's the best way to write the query... I might have written:

SELECT * FROM album a, artist r WHERE a.artistid=r.artistid AND r.name LIKE 'S%'

...I'd have to check to see if one performs better than the other, and consider which syntax I find clearer, but that's a separate issue, it's just nice to see a working, reasonable query generated because that's the point, after all.

But I found it interesting that such a minor error would cause it to not work, that's my main point.

Interestingly, it seems to have learned: I just tried the same thing, and I got the right query either way. So that's pretty cool.

It's a pretty neat feature and I can see some legitimate value in it. I'm pretty good writing SQL myself... I've managed to write some truly hideously complex queries over the years... but there are definitely instances I can recall where the query didn't seem obvious at the start, and having an AI that can MAYBE produce something that is AT LEAST a starting point is definitely something I can get onboard with.

My personal laptop suddenly broke.

Clearly, something in the motherboard got broken, because no LED is working, long press for hard reset is not working: only fans are on when I power on the button. To disconnect I should remove the battery.

It's an old (and very loved by me) laptop, but I explained it in the repair shop, and they told me they "will do all possible to repair it" by a reasonable price, so worth it.

After some days the call me to tell me that, after some tests like a display test or ram test, the problem is probably in the motherboard and they don't have the tools to fix that.
They can bring the laptop to another specialized shop for, of course, a much more expensive price.

How should I react? I'm very angry. When you told me you could "do all possible to repair it" after I told you where the problem probably is, it implies you have the tools, at least, to find out if the problem were there.

When we talk I said "yes, I accept I'll pay that price if you aren't able to fix it".
Being coherent, are you expecting to me to have the tools to pay you in that case?

I'm so tired of the impunity of companies for treating customers as if they had no idea about technology always even if in the most of cases is it. (My laptop was not apple)

What a waste of time and money.