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Good news: Today my app reached 1 million daily users. 😃😃😃💰
Bad news: It started out as a side project and my shitty code is not scaling well at all. 🙃19 -
All this stupid people working. I got a 8 Million $ Check from a south african prince. All i need to do is pay 3000$ for the paperwork. Im out you idiots.13
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"I'm not paying for a website that's going to be free to visit, that doesn't make sense"
-A million $ idea guy
28 -
I don't want to live in this world anymore. People are making fidget spinner apps, which are completely useless and getting 1 million+ downloads. And I am working hard to make educational app and hardly got 100 downloads with 0.03$ earnings.
36 -
Company: "We'd like to use SQL Server Enterprise" MS: "That'll be a quarter million dollars + $20K/month" Company: "Ok!" ... Company: "We'd like to use Babel" Babel: "Ok! npm i babel --save" Company: "Cool" Babel: "Would you like to help contribute financially?" Company: "lol no"3
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Every time I have to Google a method/function, that I know I have already looked up and used a million times previously.9
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If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.9 -
The programmer who killed people: Not so talented programmer named John, made a mistake in his code. because of this mistake the program users spent 15 minutes to do a workaround. this program had 10 million users. In general the users spent 150 million minutes because of john's mistake, which is 2.5 million hours. if a person sleeps about 8 hours a day, he have 16 active hours. which means john wasted 156,250 human days that equals to 427.8 human years. people leave approx. until the age of 64, that means John just killed 6.68 people because of his bug. So john, how do you sleep at night?10
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Million dollar app/service idea.
Automatically reply to all LinkedIn inmail’s with “I don’t have any experience with that on my profile”.
Even without any NLP I estimate over a 90% success rate.12 -
So the head developer at my company quit, and I was chosen to replace him. I haven’t even graduated college yet and am already leading development at a company with over a million active users. Is this real life?14
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Stack Overflow: Helping One Million Developers Exit Vim https://stackoverflow.blog/2017/05/... ;)
12 -
Maybe you have heard about YouTube Music...
In the Google Play Store it's the number 1 music App, Spotify behind it.
So I took a look at the stats:
YouTube Music:
- 50 Million Downloads
- 4.3 stars rating
Spotify:
- 100 Million Downloads
- 4.5 stars rating
Now change my mind:
Google promotes their products by just placing them on top of everything.16 -
Stephen Hawking has just under 70k followers on Twitter. Kim Kardashian has just under 50 million followers. This realization really pissed me off - most humans are just idiots.7
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This dude is definitely not from earth!! It was so good to see this!
He has over a million reputation and I'm still struggling in my hundreds and thousands 😂
10 -
DevOps is like development, except there is zero test coverage, everything is a race condition, and there are a million variables declared as global. 😡8
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Stack overflow helped one million developers exit vim.
Meanwhile, my friend struggling with notepad++.4 -
When people paste their whole fucking million line noobie spaghetti code into a single Stackoverflow question:
6 -
Today I became the lead developer of a system, which annually generates about 30 million in revenue.
I just finished uni. I have no idea what I'm doing.
I feel like this guy.
6 -
The weirdest shit happened today. My 14 year old sister comes to me and asks me that she has a million dollar app idea that I should make her so that she can put it on the app stores and earn.
THE PLAGUE HAS SPREADDD😱11 -
Oh fuck and boy Jesus, how on earth is this still a thing 😦
MD fucking 5 is not a fucking “secure” crypto algorithm.
This site has 14 million breached accounts with fucking MD5 hashes.
I think I’ve had to much internet for today.
17 -
I login this morning
Everyone going crazy as prod is broken in a million ways. 2.5 million exceptions In 24 hours.
We talk for 1 hour and solve nothing.
I diagnose the 2 biggest sources of exceptions and explain every step I took with screen snippets to reach my conclusions
The one other competent person on my team agrees. Otherwise complete silence.
I'm told not to fix the issue because I am leaving in 6 weeks and other people have to start taking responsibility.
No one fixes the issues. Instead they leave early. Now it's the weekend and the product is fucked.
Fucking useless people. Can't wait to leave.12 -
Even if you ask me a million times Google, I am not going to accept it. Data-hungry piece of shit -.-
5 -
Girl , are you a Pixel ? Because you 're one in like 8 million
Sorry , that was bad , carry on with your day😂3 -
Never thought an Icon Font library would make a million bucks in Kickstarter. Check out Font Awesome's campaign if you're a fan. They've got some sweet backer rewards.
9 -
soon,number of devRant users will hit its million mark and @dfox will not be able to write to everyone personally and mail their stickers!
So, here's to us, the early adapters of devRant! cheers!10 -
"Pre-Installed Malware Found On 5 Million Popular Android Phones"
"added somewhere along the supply chain"
See below how to check if it's installed
Sources:
- (new) https://thehackernews.com/2018/03/...
- (new) https://research.checkpoint.com/rot...
- (old relevant news) https://thehackernews.com/2017/03/...
---
"Rottensys" a malware which covers devices from: Honor, Huawei, Xiaomi, OPPO, Vivo, Samsung and GIONEE
---
"According to our findings, the RottenSys malware began propagating in September 2016. By March 12, 2018, 4,964,460 devices were infected by RottenSys," researchers said.
"At this moment, the massive malware campaign pushes an adware component to all infected devices that aggressively displays advertisements on the device’s home screen, as pop-up windows or full-screen ads to generate fraudulent ad-revenues."
---
If you have one of the affected devices, here's how I checked mine:
1. Install ADB (Windows: https://forum.xda-developers.com/sh...)
2. Connect your device in USB-debugging mode
3. execute "adb shell 'pm list packages -f' > output.txt" (On windows navigate to C:\adb and replace "adb" with ".\adb.exe")
4. open the now created output.txt
5. search for any of those:
com.android.yellowcalendarz (每日黄历)
com.changmi.launcher (畅米桌面)
com.android.services.securewifi (系统WIFI服务)
com.system.service.zdsgt
20 -
Oh boy, the startup managers are writing a roadmap today. Can't wait.
5 mIlLiOn DaIlY aCtIvE uSeRs By EnD oF Q1! (2022!!!)
1 MiLlIoN dAiLy ReVeNuE bY tOmOrRoW!
zErO bUgS aNd KnOwN iSsUeS iN sYsTeM bY 5Pm ToDaY!
tHoUsAnDs Of NeW cUsToMeRs WiThIn ThE nExT hOuR!6 -
Intern Me: "this is what im working on"
Fellow Intern: "Hey cool, can you send me it? "
Me: "What? The code?"
Intern: "Yeah, just send it all"
Me: "You want me to send you the entirety of the 300 million line code base for a proprietary trading system?"
Intern: "Yeah"1 -
I'm sure it's been said a million times before, and will be said a million times after, but:
*Right clicks website*
*Selects Inspect Element*
*Changes something for giggles*
...
*Someone sees over your shoulder*
"OMFG DID YOU JUST HACK THE INTERNET!"4 -
Using web2py, I wrote an SMS center for an African country and my company sold it for 1 Million dollars. I guess it was a success as it took me 10 days to develop it's initial release.3
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That's right you fucking c*nts! Put an unsubscribe button but still send me emails even after unsubscribing a million times!🖕6
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I'm nearly done importing almost half a million records to Shopify and they just formal email asking me to stop hitting their API so hard.3
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Good to see instagram move to python3 without an exception. Literally that was smooth. Cheers to those who think Python is not scalable. 95 million photos on daily basis. 400 daily users.
https://thenewstack.io/instagram-ma...5 -
"we don't plan on fixing a huge security hole that allows for root on our one server that runs our million-dollar service"
3 -
Every single time a friend comes to you with a "million dollar app idea" because he knows you're in webdev
6 -
The world of storage gonna change..
Yesterday, scientists successfully stored and retrieved back an entire OS, a movie and some other files from a DNA.
It is estimated that a single gram of DNA can store 215 million GB of data. ( Now the storage can be as small as invisible. )10 -
MFW the company that have a turnover around $100 million via their woocommerce site only does'nt want to upgrade from PHP5.4 because "it is too much work".
Well fuck you then3 -
On my first day at work realising that I would be working on a code base with 1.5 million+ lines of code and the only documentation is half a paragraph some guy wrote the day before he left 😑3
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post != rant;
post = "Feature Request";
@dfox
Stack Overflow is full of abuntch of downvoteing dickbuts. The devrant community is so much more accepting of new devs, why not add a question section.
Down votes would only be allowed for spammers.
One the question was solved, it would go into the devrant question archive, Searchable by everyone.
Ik you have heard this one before, but it's Just my two cents.9 -
Developing a Haskell project, indenting everything with 3 spaces. Develop to over a million lines of code. Use Darcs as a repository. Run the code on AIX powerpc architecture. Suffering from special snowflake syndrome.9
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Just found old logs I had with an ex-client, pre-devrant:
"What if we add the newsletter checkbox to the login, so each time a user logs in, he has to uncheck it, or else he will be subscribed to our newsletter?"
Not sure if that even needs a comment, I am speechless that was an actual suggestion, ever.1 -
Requirements for developing iOS apps:
$99/year, Swift, OSX, Mac, Xcode, and patience waiting for app store approval. Are there even iOS devs out there or it's just a scam?15 -
Started watching silicon Valley. HELL, THE BEST TECH SERIES EVER.don't know why i always end up watching long multi-season series in my exam days xD
Anyways what would you guys choose for your million dollar idea: sell it at $10 million, or build a company out of it? I will definitely sell.
14 -
I accidentally triggered a reindex on an database with 14 million records in it. It prevented hundreds of people from doing their jobs for several hours. Probably cost the company tens of thousands of dollars. Didn't get fired for it, but man it didn't feel good...
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Props to the devs who made this app, literally does nothing but still have 1 million dowloads and tons of 5 stars.
6 -
Fix a million things, including a project that is suddenly urgent, feels tired but satisfied, ready to go home...then it turns out there's still 4 hours of the day left...
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So my boss thinks that it takes maximum of two days to create a website in WordPress.
I agree with that, but what about the million requirements of the client and you about the theme? and custom dashboards?
PS: Only one developer will work on one website!6 -
Why are there a million websites that scrap and republish stack overflow content? SEO induced page hits for fraudulent publicity?
Whatever the reason I hate them so much.7 -
!rant
As i mentionned here https://www.devrant.io/rants/434101 i was at the hospital. My girlfriend brought me a computer and i'm working on a room organization application for her classroom (she is a teacher).
Rant
Now she is with me at the hospital... in another room delivering our little feature... i'm going to be a dad. Oh and btw this is a rant because it is hard for me to go see her as i am stuck in a bed...7 -
If you upvote this rant I'll place a million in your account. All I need is your routing and account numbers to transfer the monies, as I am a Nigerian prince who lives too far to give it to you in person2
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Why I hate my job: 18 out of 21 developers are Chinese daily smokers barely speak English.
Why I love my job: We build software/hardware to predict future earthquakes and save lives and hundred million or even billions dollars in damages. And of course make China super rich by selling it.10 -
When you notice in the app store an app that does pretty much what yours does but was created after yours...
It has 1 million downloads (and it's featured by the app store) where as yours has only 500 😤😭😞😟23 -
The time the manager blew wind in a million dollar + client meeting. The meeting ended quick soon after that as the smell lingered in the room for hours. The client went else where we lost our jobs.3
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!Rant
Best motivation for startups...
Usain Bolt has won 9 gold medals in last 3 Olympics and he has run less than 2 mins on the track. That's economy of effort.
Usain Bolt ran for less than 115 secs in total in his 3 Olympics and made $119 million dollars! That's more than $1 million for each second he ran!
But for those 2 mins he trained for 20+ years!
That's investment.👍 -
Lisp code was live-debugged and fixed with REPL on a spacecraft 100 million miles away
“An even more impressive instance of remote debugging occurred on NASA's 1998 Deep Space 1 mission. A half year after the space craft launched, a bit of Lisp code was going to control the spacecraft for two days while conducting a sequence of experiments. Unfortunately, a subtle race condition in the code had escaped detection during ground testing and was already in space. When the bug manifested in the wild--100 million miles away from Earth--the team was able to diagnose and fix the running code, allowing the experiments to complete. One of the programmers described it as follows:
Debugging a program running on a $100M piece of hardware that is 100 million miles away is an interesting experience. Having a read-eval-print loop running on the spacecraft proved invaluable in finding and fixing the problem.”
https://gigamonkeys.com/book/...4 -
when you have a million applications open on your computer because you're in the middle of some massive change and you come back the next morning to find out that your machine has restarted during the night...😲6
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A new breach has just been confirmed about 10 minutes ago. CHECK YOUR EMAILS AND PASSWORDS!!!
Details at: https://troyhunt.com/the-773-millio...
CHECK YOUR EMAILS AND PASSWORDS AT haveibeenpwned.com TO CHECK FOR WHETHER YOU WERE COMPROMISED.9 -
So... The client saw a screenshot of me calling him a 'mother fucking French fuck' which resulted in him backing out, our company bearing a loss of almost half a million and me getting suspended.
So how's your day been going?10 -
There's this insurance chain in the US that says its goal is to save America $500 million, so for their ads they ask a bunch of kids what they'd do with $500 million. What they neglect to mention...
14 -
The TSA might have paid $1.4 million for the app demonstrated here: https://youtube.com/watch/... (they claim they "only" paid $47,000). Either way, seriously?????3
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All these developers complaining about not being able to finish the million side projects they have and I'm sitting here wishing I was creative enough to have one.4
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I'm sick of the tyranny of websites who say your password must include at least one shady character, one special agent, and a number of other filthy things. Only makes your passwords impossible to remember, hard to type, and not a bit more secure.
"mynameisronalddumpandimanorangehairedorangutan" is a million times more secure than "P4$$word".13 -
The dreamer : doer ratio
"I have a million dollar idea"
"That's cool!"
"I just need someone to do the work and I'll be rich!"
DO THE WORK YOURSELF!!!4 -
Reading all these posts about 1.5 - 2 million line code bases, is that it!?! Your tiny 1.5 is nothing against my unmanageable 22.5!6
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this === 'rant'
> True
A million dollars for the head that creates a lethal virus that forcefully uninstalls IE and installs Firefox/Chrome and unleashes it upon planet Earth. Sorry if this sounds too harsh but guess what? FUCK IE.13 -
Just spent about a day and a half debugging my code a million different ways, only to discover that the third party call that kept failing needed the id in UPPERCASE.
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I think it's the first time I see 1 million lines changed in a single commit. Amazing.
https://github.com/DrKLO/Telegram/...
6 -
I hate it when certain keyboards have fn or the alt key at the edge of the keyboard instead of ctrl because it makes copying and pasting like a million times harder.3
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They say: If you build this app, I'll give you 10% equity.
I hear: If you work for 6 weeks straight, I'll give you somewhere in between 0 and 5 million dollars.1 -
How would you handle a noob who hasn't committed in weeks and when he does, gets like a million conflicts.18
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If I had the choice to punch Richard Hendricks in the face or win a million bucks....i would still take the million bucks.
But Richard is pretty damned punchable sometimes.7 -
Happiness is removing all the compiling warning from a project which has half a million of lines of codes
*peace*3 -
Hackers hid backdoor in CCleaner, with 2 billion downloads and 2.3 million greatly affected and detected so far, go fuck yourself you Windows fucking gloating noob fanboys showing off how you clean your C with CCleaner like a breeze, go clean your ass now and hope there's no backdoor there! 🖕8
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Riddle me this:
While calculating software reliability in number of faults per million line of code, would the software become more reliable if the number of lines are increased instead of errors reduced 🤔8 -
Hertz the car rental company wanted a new website. They hired accenture. Accenture did allegedly a poor job. The site did not come with responsiveness, not with web components and 2 years over deadline. Hertz sues Accenture for $38+ million.
Scope creep deluxe?9 -
Hmm, I had plans to quit my job, but then the company got orders worth 3 million dollaros and will continue to get every three month now.6
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NOOOOO ITS RIIIIISIIIIINGGGGG
Please help stop this stupidity, it's inceased by 5 MILLION since last time I checked...
4 -
1.5 million lines of undocumented spaghetti code. Think 500~1000 lines functions, 5k+ lines classes, string html concatenation. You name it, it had it. And complete unwillingness to improve it by the company. I eventually quit after considering doing it about 2, 3 times.4
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I think my LED strip is displaying 16 million colors faster than i can process. Im drunk, so everything is possible.
Jiggletits2 -
"If a million monkeys were typing on computers, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs." — Anonymous1
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"Don't waste time on security, just make it work" heard this from a "security head manager" at a 1 million eval. company 3 years ago1
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Twitter emails are the nastiest shit somebody could have ever thought of, theres atleast five million variations of emails: suggestions, you missed these tweets, ... and every single one has to be unsubscribed via its own link, you can't just fucking unsubscribe from all its bullshit2
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If only we could only download the entire internet and cache it in a disk at home
THEN I WOULDN'T HAVE TO FUCKING RECONNECT TO READ SIMPLE DOCUMENTATION EVERY FUCKING TIME MY INTERNET DROPS
I'M NOT DOWNLOADING A MILLION DEPENDENCIES I'M JUST READING STACKOVERFLOW, FIX THE INTERNET FUCK5 -
Myself and a fellow coworker both joined post-covid, so we've never been into the office.
Considering our voices aren't a million miles apart, we're both rather tempted to introduce ourselves as the other person when we eventually go back to the office, just to see if anyone cottons on 😁1 -
Moving a stupid shadow 1 px up because UX sees everything like a fucking microscope. O bet a million users will he thankful for that and will use the app again. 😑4
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Today I learned that there are 26.9 million software developers in the world as of 2020.
That's only 0.35% of the World Population. We're special guys!9 -
I think I used to rage more at complete idiots when I was younger because I had the time and energy to do so
Now I've seen it at least a million times and just don't give a shit anymore -
Soooo.. facebook got breached today, 50 million accounts compromised. I'm sure that will help their stock price.. 😂
Change your passwords, ladies and gents!11 -
So this company wanted their site launched early..so I coded for 3 days straight, hardly a wink of sleep and I launched it by the new deadline they gave me. Then they send me screenshots of a million problems with CSS and I'm like...THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RUSH YOU STUPID PRICKS2
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I serialized and parsed a million reddit comments with spacy on my laptop.
It took over an hour.
And then, right when it finished....
http://imgur.com/TIiACHC
I forgot to change from json to ujson
FML.4 -
It looks like reddit is about to expand by approximately raising $150 Million. https://bloomberg.com/news/...2
-
Got to scratch of one of three remaining old (14years and counting) design mistakes this week.
Together with a colleague we replaced a 1.5 billion row table that I out of ignorance then designed with a 3 column composite primary key instead of an identity column.
Moving the data while keeping all synchronized (the table gets up towards 2 million new rows and 2 million updates a day while constantly being queried) took 1 week.
Just 2 skeletons left to clean out, any year now ;).1 -
Simulating a couple million elastic search searches and aggregations in 2h instead of 3 months ... :)3
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Fuck you JavaScript with your blocks within blocks within blocks, your promises and callbacks, your million of libraries that are doublons or not finished. Fuck you with your assigning variable before functions, fuck you!11
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I hate wen my code works perfectly; then all of a sudden a million errors popup out of nowhere. 😠😠😠4
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!(!StrangeRant)
I want to have a program that makes programs.
----CONSOLE------------------------
$ sudo makep
(makep = make program)
$ makep > destroy the world and make that me and i are the only survivor
$ makep > select language > TrumpLang
$ makep > Please wait...
$ makep > Compiling...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
(i died)
$ makep > .........
$ makep > Building...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
$ makep > .........
(ok, so i wont wait 1 million years here, so lets say 1 million years passed)
$ makep > Running...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
$ makep > .........
(ok, so i wont wait 1 million years here, so lets say 1 million years passed)
$ makep > Destroying...
$ makep > Finished!
$ makep > Press CTRL+F to shut down.
-----------------------------------
Earth stopped.
This computer is the only survivor.
While he was compiling, he got artificial intelligence.
He tried to survive.
Now the story begins.
The life of a computer.
Alone.
In theaters at 2018/04/01.
Buy tickets now!
IMDB / RT rated this movie 10/10
-----------
Footnotes
This movie is containing parental advisory content.
(This is sponsored by the awesome people at Turbo C and IBM)9 -
I'm tasked with hacking a million dollar production machine and all the PLCs have the same password for the root user, which also happens to be the name of the company producing this shit....5
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It's always the people who being nothing but "million dollar ideas" who want you to build the entire product and then have the audacity to ask for 50% profit.7
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About today when I was trying to migration 2 million+ records simultaneously!
Ran two migration @ once and this happened!
PS: On restart everything is back to normal but lost 2 tables data which needs remigration!
6 -
Couldnt fix a bug that conflicted with an unrelated codebase. A 1 in a million issue on github.
Had a wank.
Bug fixed, pushed, and deployed 30 minutes later.2 -
~# mkdir certs
~# openssl req -newkey.......
*checked certs dir*
hmm.. empty?
*generated certs again*
Certs dir still empty. Reverted to Google for answers. None found. I was using FileZilla to check the Certs directory.
15 minutes and a million tries late, I realized that I forgot to CD into the Certs directory...............2 -
yet here people are fucking driving nonstop even though our fucking gas prices are through the roof.....
just giving alllllllll our goddamn money away.
also i think this is an awesome project.
far better than the million and 1 stupid tasking boards like monday.com heh
10 -
Today so far:
1. How to become a professional project manager in few months
2. From zero to pro in C++ with this course bundle
3. 2 Months into flutter and I regret nothing
Uni graduates: Remember when we had to bang our heads against the wall a million times to finally earn our degree!
Non uni graduates: Remember when you had to go through million documentations, write lots of code to sharpen your skills?
Ya both categories above can go fuck them selves, these days follow a tutorial or buy a 10 min videos to be the next big thing in any field ... -
Call me when covid-19 gets this bad:
From April 12, 2009 to April 10, 2010, CDC estimated there were 60.8 million cases (range: 43.3-89.3 million), 274,304 hospitalizations (range: 195,086-402,719), and 12,469 deaths (range: 8868-18,306) in the United States due to the (H1N1)pdm09 virus. Yet almost no media coverage. The "woke" people were in charge then.
Until then media outlets, STFU...
When all is said and done the media will be guilty of wielding weapons of misdirection. The disgustingness of people willing to use this outbreak as a way for political gain is abominable.
At my work?:
People have not been able to travel so that has been annoying.16 -
It's disgusting how a package like compress-commons can have 1.3 million weekly downloads yet no documentation whatsoever and not even any relevant comments in the code. Honestly fuck the javascript ecosystem3
-
"How to exit the Vim editor?" hit 1,000,000 view milestone and a stackoverflow guy wrote a blog article about it with some neat facts. A good read imho.
https://stackoverflow.blog/2017/05/...2 -
Don't forget, docker desktop will require paid licenses after 31/1/22
Docker Desktop remains free for small businesses (fewer than 250 employees AND less than $10 million in annual revenue), personal use, education, and non-commercial open source projects.
Just a friendly reminder to fuck docker and migrate to a better solution.27 -
I've installed Ubuntu a million times before, but never had it hang here for 20 minutes, anyone else ever experienced it? :-/
Don't want to hard reset the PC while the USB is being used
11 -
I'm absolutely amazed this business keeps going. I've been fighting with an upgrade process (for a product I don't usually work on) for two full days now and every. single. thing. has a million specific workarounds. HOW DOES THIS EVEN GO?1
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I've just realized that a game with over 1 million downloads (the ranking list is over 2 million people) has its solutions saved in the preference's file. So anyone with a rooted phone can access this file. This make me so fucking crazy: you make a stupid shitty game and get over 2 million users and don't even bother to make it good.
Now I have to decide whether to write to the developer to inform him that this is a stupid way to store the solutions or to make an app to let everyone know the solutions.4 -
2nd year programming professionally I designed, coded, and released a PCI compliant credit card encryption system, including updating all 7 million records (at the time) in our existing database to utilize the new system. By some miracle, it worked with only one small hiccup (see previous rant).
-
my phone based set up. guess who provisions all the phones to our platform. then tests 9 million phones and takes the flack when users press incorrect keys or their internet goes down on site and it 'must be a provisioning issue'......this asshole.
1 -
What's wrong with the idea of having a huge computational network like in Watch Dogs to bruteforce encryption ?
I mean suppose having 500 or more million cores , how long does it actually take to bruteforce a 256 bit key ?11 -
MySpace has lost its entire music catalogue pre-2016, an estimated 50 million songs in a failed server migration: https://theregister.co.uk/2019/03/...8
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Well, there's that. LINK = CCleaner infected, 2.3 million infected. https://google.com/amp/s/... today gets better and better.4
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Working on individual projects is a million times more fun than interview prep / doing Leetcode problems.
I wish companies looked at my few years of experience and personal projects rather than testing my knowledge by asking me some random "Hard level" Leetcode question. -
Girk,are you pixel ?Because you're one in like 8 million Sorry, that was bad , carry on with your day4
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When learning new tech, it takes me forever to get the environment/dependencies setup because of the million different errors I get.
Am I just too dumb to follow installation instructions?1 -
My first TrumpScript:
https://github.com/samshadwell/...
A million is 1000000
and one is, million over million;
our great country is, 1000010 minus million;
make immigrants, country times million;
For as long as, we have immigrants greater than one;:
I say immigrants
I say "That wall just got ten feet taller!"
And we have to make immigrants go back, fight immigrants over country;!
say it with me "We made America great again!!"
America is great.1 -
Wish we can shut down every tech product and service and start all over again. All the million dollar ideas are already realized and the only thing to do is be a rich guys employee now.9
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This new intern chose to write CSS instead of LESS/SASS even though I showed him how much time/lines of code were saved using LESS because he was "so used to it". Go ahead.. Enjoy writing 1 million lines of css to accomplish the same task.1
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!rant. I'm seeking advice.
This question have been asked a million times. But i still want to try to seek answer on this platform.
Is a degree worth it. In this current era?26 -
I have never encountered a codebase so horrendous. The styles are so fucking bad.
Give me a codebase with a poorly implemented programming langauge, fine.
Give me a codebase with styles that have been copy/pasted off Stackoverflow a million times until something works, not fucking fine. -
I will literally give half a million us dollars to anyone who programms an AI that can study and pass exams for me and that in a manner that I will get away with. Help!
I prefer to pay in bitcoin.10 -
Facebook don’t give a single fuck if you have a million years of experience, you’re going to fucking solve the “algorithm” shit —while they still admit you won’t remember much about it.
The HR guy was damn straight about it: you have to practice a lot.
Bitch, I’m out.10 -
Converting 1.5 million lined web app to a rest API....realizing it would be so much easier to just re-develop the web application....at least we're finally starting to move away from coldfusion and heading to node!
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The worst thing about building an "accessible" app is that you might just have 4 users out of the million who need it.
Either they don't know it exists or it needs to be modified for every user!4 -
Dang it all to hestia. I was feeling lower and lower then I realized I wasn't exercising like at all. So I got to my walks again at work and went to gym after work. I feel like a million bucks!2
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I was happy because I broke 600 points on StackOverflow. Then I saw the post about the guy that reached 1 million and it killed my self confidence2
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I was almost through with a mission on Modern Warfare 3 special ops after being killed a million times but then windows update couldn't fucking wait! Seriously wtf???!4
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When your internship boss orders you to work on a PHP project. And you see that the original maker of code has repeated things a million times
2 -
When you decide to create a startup and then look for someone on freelancer.com to create your Million Dollar product with a budget of 750-1500
4 -
Was watching a movie with other people. But when it got to the climax....
Java. Flippin'. Update.
"20 million devices uses..." "Shuddup."3 -
Manny a developer has been foiled by a single random misplace punctuation mark hiding in a million lines of code.3
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Trying to learn Angular and reactjs, reading up the tutorial or documentation...
Why the hell are there ten million more shit I need to look at first? (such as rxjs, Babel, webpack... and whatever the fuck they are)
Now am I supposed to master those ten million tools/libraries before I can proceed?
Of course there is no ten million but mentally it's no difference. I'm just fed up with this.3 -
Let me share a million dollar worth of advice with y'all
RGB makes your code run faster and gets rid of errors. If it doesn't work, you're not using enough RGB.7 -
Me :- how many words have I written ??
Is it million
Or it is two million
Word counter:- 100 words
Me:-😵😵😵😵6 -
According to the report of Reuters : Brazil's Ministry of Justice said on Monday it has fined U.S. tech giant Facebook 6.6 million reais ($1.6 million) for improperly sharing user data. The ministry's department of consumer protection said it had found that data from 443,000 Facebook users was made improperly available to developers of an App called 'thisisyourdigitallife.' The data was being shared for "questionable" purposes, the ministry said in a statement.7
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Got anymore runtime exception handlers with that?
When a paid service that promises a million connection types can't even do an initial sync 🤦♂️. Back to bash scripting it is...
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FUCK! I've done this a fucking God fucking damn million fucking God fucking damn times fucking before! FUCK! FUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUCK!
The best part is that someone is going be paying me once it works............................... FUUUUU K!
2 -
It booted, after months of working on a god damn simulation with various BIOSs revisions and fixes, with millions of kernel builds and a million of fixes of recipes. It booted from a first try. I almost fainted :D3
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Personal mini-project from a million years ago which I practically don't maintain anymore, broke. External APIs are being bitches.
Made a fix, but I'm too lazy to push. (I don't think anyone else is using it tbh)
Huehuehue.6 -
Some backstreet fine artist come designer came to me wanting a website, her brief was a moonpig.com but for wedding stationery. I asked her if she had a million plus marketing budget for launch and a shit pile of cash, or was it just really some simple website that people can hire you to design bespoke wedding stationery. In the end she agreed it was just another basic website for peanuts. Either way the answer was fuck off, use squarespace or some other shit that you can fuck about in and cut me out of the process, I don’t want your tiny pittance and months of can you just.1
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Director of Software Engineering doesn’t index any data including million plus row tales, and didn’t know what they were when asked about them.5
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That's why we love NPM:
>npm install
*installing packages*
npm warn ........................
npm warn deprecated .....................
npm warn .......................
********** A million times more ***********
Oh it works! eh, just ignore every warning :)4 -
Why do all these fucking stores not sell anything that isn't crap ? Our waste centric culture pisses me off when I can't just always buy something new immediately on something else wearing out
Goddamn getting back on my feet a million times crap !9 -
The difference between having a million dollar idea and having a million dollars is, unfortunately, a awful lot of work.9
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Why am I not super rich of being a dev my friends ask me. Well, it's Saturday, I have now worked around 75 hours this week. When am I supposed to have time for all of that develop my own million dollar fail?2
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Only now just discovered Termux for android... How have i not known of this?!
My Chromebook just got a million times more useful! :-D
Now to learn about vim and start hating myself :-34 -
Truncated a database of around 14 million records today... Had 2 minutes of silence after it with my buddies @hahaha1234 and @papierbouwer1
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40k vs 1.6m city, same pay, same position, same company - life million times more easy and much, much cheaper. Could change a flat to a huge house easily. goto or !goto8
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Is it okay, to wrap posix-commands in your program for stuff like remove, mkdir and copy, if the language doesn't provide this functionality to accomplish these, without having to implement them yourself and handle half a million edge-cases.23
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I belong to a Javascript discussion forum on social media where people post dumb questions that have been answered a million times in stack overflow or ask ‘Can I learn {JS framework} without knowing JS? Only there to answer questions because I am 100 percent non-contributing idiot at my current job.
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I can write million-dollar-software from scratch but I can't make my i3wm look like anything other than utter shit.2
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Found out a contractor stored 2.5 million rows of user info as json objects. 2.5 million is our sample size. Please tell me this is nuts right... Searching that would be taxing right?4
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How the fuck can I get npm@5 to show me everything it just installed when I type `npm install`?
Was this because some twat wanted to push the idiotic idea that it's perfectly acceptable for js projects to rely on three million two line hipster.js libraries?
Fuck everything about the node ecosystem.2 -
Opening a million tabs on Chrome, inwardly saying, 'I'll get back to you later' after briefly reading the first few paragraphs
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Some noob in some part of the world responsible for migrating a DB used by an application I developed forgot to migrate permissions apparently and now I can't access the db and he's sleeping while I get a million mails from clients😑😑😑
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People who specifically attribute all value to people making money are the core problem
So many infant raping pieces of human trash make money
Our system could just work at last and there could be a million things being done better or being finished22 -
To find and be able to fully deliver one project with a multi-million dollar profit just for me so I can just retire already.
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Today i received a hard drive contraining one million malicious non-PE files for a ML baed project.
It's going to be a fun week.14 -
Recovering a Raid 1 EXT4 disk to a ZFS disk. Thank god for Adobe programs and their multi million file-based caching files.
recovery_time.add(4.hours) -
It's sad how easy it is to fool people by switching between absolute and relative values.
3 million people did this, 3 million people own that, 3 million people agree on those things, it all seems significant - but 1% of US population sounds completely marginal and irrelevant...1 -
I started with my first Android project. Here are some of my observations.
Turning of fossil into fuel - 650 million years
Transformation of a star into supernova - 10 billion years
Complete gradle build - fuckzillion years2 -
"Hey - just get inspired by this code from _insertBigTechCompanyHere_ and you will be fine!"
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"You mean the code for which x departments have worked x months and spent x million dollars?
Yeah.
Five minutes..." -
eleven billion, seven hundred twenty-three million, five hundred twelve thousand, three hundred sixty-eight hashes later and I still haven't found the vanity address I'm looking for 😴...
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Ever happened,.. ? the whole Application crash due to a bug in one of the libraries used and you skim through the code a million times, make a billion changes but the app still crashes.2
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Best: realizing that development could be a career and switching to it as a major
Worst: first dev job working on a 15 year old legacy visual basic project with over 3 million lines -
So how long before someone like @Jumpshot44 or our won @dfox reaches a million +1s on their profile?
@dfox @trogus what is the datatype you guys used, in other words, how much can fit?7 -
Just dumped one month's GitHub public data or my local machine. Ah boy that was too much data. About 80 GB with 30.9 million documents in mongodb. Too much for local machine. :sigh:
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When you receive a psd file with a million layers, when all you really need from it is the colour values and what font/size they've used and some measurements. You'll just do it all properly with CSS. Better off with a flat png or 2 with transparency and some original vectors.
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This is about the best blog post describing exactly how the tech industry works. Or doesn't work, as it were.
"I Accidentally Saved Half A Million Dollars"
https://ludic.mataroa.blog/blog/...3 -
You know it will be a fucking glorious day when you open up that legacy project from 3 years ago.
Calling those NPM package dependencies "outdated" is an understatement...
3 years equals to roughly 1 million new JS hipster frameworks.1 -
what are some valid reasons why a company with 20.x Million customers will ever get motivated to migrate from AWS to, not google cloud, Oracle cloud or the likes; but, to On Premises Cloud.
Wrong answers only.8 -
I litterly hate my Windows Laptop. It BSoDed like a Million Times already.... What Linux Operrating System do u prefer? XD11
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!rant
Can I please just randomly find a million euros somewhere so I can just fuck off everything?!
🤑🤑🤑 -
The Free Software Foundation (FSF) announced it has received several earmarked charitable donations from Handshake.
Full story : https://fsf.org/news/... -
git isn't as solid as people believe.
Yes, it's used by million of companies. But it's not so solid35 -
The thing that you have a million ideas for pet projects and that this blocks your brain so much that you can't do any of them...
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I have a game night at my place every other week. We play cards against humanity, unstable unicorns, million dollars but, or exploding kittens and order some food from a different place every time.
Other than that it's late night game sessions. -
Pick one:
Live out your school life again as a 10-year old with the same level of knowledge you have now.
Or,
Be 65 years old with $10 million in the bank.42 -
I have to implement DSP using Convolution, FFT. And for the past 2 days I have like a million tabs open in Chrome and half of the titles end with ".... for dummies" :D
At least I'm learning something new and when I understand what the math behind those terms does I feel awesome :D -
when you got an exception on store and you've tried it like a million times and it didn't happen, and you just give up and "try catch" that motherfucker!
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Okay so if a company decides to use md5 for hashing passwords after a million users already registered how the hell will they transition to any other way of storing passwords. As they don't have plaintext to convert them into the new hashing function.12
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When someone truncates several tables and removes their column indices in DEV so my quick two line change testing goes from taking 30 minutes to 3 days while I restore all 200 million rows and re-index all the columns. 🙄
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Client was on a budget and it couldn't go past CMS dev work. He wanted A MILLION EXTRA FUNCTIONS and didn't believe me when I told him I'd have to code from the child theme and disregard his pre-installed full theme... fml
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I just found out that most developers make their first million by age 30.
...syntax errors that is.😉1 -
You know when you're tired and want to go to bed, but your brain goes "Shame about that. I've got a million ideas that you need to try out now"
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searched for a query at google, and it returned only 5 responses. really feel like one in a million this time.
Can't be more sad than this.
#wow -
Did some math and to get into the three comma club a person most sell software for 60 bucks to 17 million people. Turns out COD has made a billion.
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Why does scala 2.13 refactored its collection library AGAIN???? It just killed me 1 million brain cells to remember the shit called CanBuildFrom and how can they just threw all the shit away like that?6
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As usual, the million-dollar question: whats the best laptop to buy for developers, in the price range up to $1,500?
I'm between a 2015 Macbook Pro, the new Dell Latitude or the Thinkpad T460 😕10 -
Rant!
This guy CockSuckerBerg!
Facebook has leaked 50 million account data..
Their Stocks are going down rapidly almost 7+% due to this..
AsslickerBerg2 -
It took 8 million years for a monkey to evolve into a man. But still, a monkey went to space before a man.
-The Internet2 -
Happy Friday. Facebook just disclosed hackers have exploited multiple vulnerabilities to get access to potentially 50 million users. I guess... no weekend for the blue team? https://mobile.twitter.com/dnvolz/...
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All the things Zohar planned for 2018, but I didn’t had enough time to do them. And probably a million new things.
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Adhering to Apples million and one icon requirements, including the 1px size difference icon and then reading "@3x about 66 pixels" Implementing the million different icons into the application only to find that it's using the smallest one anyway...1
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It's 2016 and I still could not find a simple Markdown to HTML generator that mirrors the directory structure and does not require me to spend 20 million years with configs.
Had to roll my own.2 -
I think we should create another github, move every github users there and watch till microsoft buys our company for 2 million dollars.4
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What would be the best Linux distro for someone who's used Windows all his life? My friend has recently been getting super pissed about windows and it's land of a million updates so he wants to switch to Linux but doesn't know what distro to use. Personally I would recommend Ubuntu.2
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TrumpScript is one funny programming language that was formulated by four Rice University undergraduates. TrumpScript allows developers to operate with numbers that are bigger than one million. If programmers user numbers less than a million then it will generate a quote from Donald Trump as an error message: ”I’m really rich, Part of the beauty of me is I’m very rich.”1
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I just made a complete list of 185+ excellent no-code tools you can use to build your next million-dollar app.
Visit: https://zerobizz.com/p/...
7 -
What was the idea behind java spring (jpa) and creating/using like a million annotations? There are annotations for literally everything...2
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I was scrolling through my past rants and found this gem
https://devrant.com/rants/2305697/...
I posted it when images were not loading due to expired ssl. Looks like everyone who saw this got tricked!!
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