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Search - "window out"
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Today I found out that I could inject HTML into our documentation system.
I quickly tested it with the <style> tag by setting all paragraph tags to have eye bleeding red backgrounds.
Then when seeing that it works I've made a modal that displays a blinking red alert with the headline "Access Denied!", a loading bar that says "Tracing intruder IP..." and another line "Erasing confidential information.. .".
Then I've added an animation to run on all paragraph, heading and list tags - first they bounce and then the become transparent.
Then I asked one of the interns to go to that specific document - one of the longest and most important manuals they have access to.
I then left the room and through a window watched the poor, panicking guy looking into the abyss and "realizing" that he somehow deleted the important files and will be traced down soon.
I had to tell him the truth to avoid a suicide in the office.
It was perfect! I will definitely do this to others! :D12 -
Me: *hours of coding, develops a feature*
Code: I'm working..
Me: Oh good.. will monitor you for sometime.
Code: Ok, I'm done. I'll stop working now.
Me: WTF
Me: *sits for hours to solve bugs*
And when almost done,
VPN: Someone's having a good day, I'll disconnect you now.
Me: WTF
Me: *tries switching on/off VPN couple of times..*
When it starts to connect,
WIFI: Oh wait!! It's my turn to bid goodbye now. Have a nice day sir
Me: Of course !! The wifi
Me: *restarts router/ troubleshoot etc*
When wifi says connected...
Battery: Good job with wifi.. I'm down now..what you gonna do?
Me: Are you fucking kidding me???
Me: *connects charger, wait for laptop to switch on*
Windows: Updating....
Me: *jumps out window*13 -
Agency: " Sir, we found 3 candidates as per your requirements, now how do you want their placements sir?"
M.D: "Put about 100 bricks in a closed room. Then send the candidates into the room & close the door, leave them alone & come back after a few hours and analyse the situation:-
1) If they are counting the bricks, Put them in Accounts deptt.
2) If they are re-counting the bricks, Put them in Auditing.
3) If they have messed up the whole room with the bricks, Put them in Engineering.
4) If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, Put them in Planning.
5) If they are throwing the bricks at each other, Put them in Operations.
6) If they are sleeping, Put them in Security.
7) If they have broken the bricks into pieces, Put them in Information Technology.
8) If they are sitting idle, Put them in Human Resources.
9) If they say they have tried different combinations yet not a single brick has been moved, Put them in Sales.
10) If they have already left for the day, Put them in Marketing.
11) If they are staring out of the window, Put them in Strategic Planning.
And.......
12) If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been touched, Congratulate them and put them in Top Management.
😂🤣😃😁😅😜6 -
Customer: I need a program that can do this.
Me: Okay. We can do this. But we recommend you a gui.
Customer: Oh I don‘t need a gui. We have Windows.
Me: you will need a gui. Here you are a dummy programme without a gui. Try it out. Find out yourself.
Customer: I trust you. Dummy is fine. But it’s not ready yet, right?
Me: It’s just a dummy to show you what it means, having ni gui for that.
Customer: all fine i need this programme. Go ahead.
Me codes and silently makes one build with gui... ;) xou know what comes:
Me: here you are your programme.
Customer: how to use it? It is cryptic. A black window opens. I cannot click. The manual is full of text i habve to type. I don’t understand!?
Me: you need a gui.
Customer: Oh. I thought since windows 3.11 everything has one...
Me: pay me bucks I make you the gui.
C: meh. Okay here you are bucks.
Me: take this
C: wow so fast. This is cool. Take my money.
This sort of cognitive dissonance I will never understand. In first case ignoring my hints. In second recognizing my hints were true. But in third forgetting own stupidness and paying me extra-extra for what you ignored? Ethically I hated you so much for ignoring me, that I took your money, but you could have gotten me blaming me not selling you a gui... :D
Have a nice weekend5 -
I love listening to music and reading on the train every morning. On my way to the station, I get a text, "DUDE. ***** committed suicide."
He was a good friends of ours from high school. I remember once he got a few of us to go caving on homecoming since none of us had dates. He'd never finish a candy bar; would give half of everything away. He once drove out to California to try to start over; lasted three days and came home, but through a girl he met he was in Hawaii for a year.
He lived a lot of life, and he had a heart of gold.
I didn't get out my ebook on my phone. I didn't even put my headphones in.
I had lost another close friend from University while I was overseas. I remember being in the city art gallery when I got the news. I walked right out to the harbor, fell to my knees and cried. I always thought one day I'd be home and could shoot the shit with my old roommate. Now he was gone, and the only thing I had from him was a text from 10 days before saying, "I haven't been doing too well, but thanks for asking."
I'm back in another software engineering job, on the train to an 8-to-5, shakin it for the money. I couldn't read on the commute. I just looked out that window as the train car descended into the subway, and thought to myself, "What am I even doing anyway?"
I'm in my mid-30s; too young to be losing people like this.
I'm sorry man. I wish we had caught up sooner. I wish you weren't gone, but I know you're at peace.23 -
7 am. Dog wants out. I roll out of bed after trying to pretend I am dead.
Walk down the stairs to the side door. Half asleep and notice that the door has daylight shining through on the lock side. Didn't shut it all the way the night before. Walk outside. Dog does his thing. Turn around. Doors locked.
Fuck.
Go for my phone. In the house. Go for my keys. In the house. Fuck. Fuck a duck.
Start checking my windows. One opens a fraction of an inch. Doesn't do me any good. Dog is outside with me. Freezing his ass off. It's like 5 degrees here.
Both of my neighbors don't answer their door. Life flashes before my eyes. Put my dog in my jacket to warm him up. Little 15lb rat terrier. Not made for snow.
He's fine for now. I grab a piece of rebar from my backyard and lever my window a bit more open, busting one of the locks.
And then I yell "ALEXA. OPEN THE FRONT DOOR." The voice of an angel responds. "OK." Whirrr. Click. Door opens. Sweet warmth.
I need a fake rock with a key under it.
Great Sunday.18 -
The programmer and the interns part 3.
Many of you asked me to keep posting about the interns that I'm responsible for.
I had the intention but never had the time or the energy. Since the interns only kept doing stupid, unthinkable things and just filtering out the good ones is a task of its own.
Time has passed, some interns left us by their choice, others were fired (for obvious reasons). Some stayed loyal and were given permanent positions. New ones joined. I no longer am directly responsible for their wellbeing, yet, somehow I am still their tech-lead and the developer of their tools.
Without further delay,
Case 0:
New guy get's into the internship, has his LinkedIn title set to ‘HTML Technician’.
Didn’t know about the existence of HTML5.
Been building static web pages in the early 2000s. The kind with embedded, inline CSS.
Claims that he is about to finish an engineering degree (sadly I believe him).
Fails the entry level Linux test. Complains about the similarity of the answer options.
Fails the basic web-standars test because "they change so fast, but the foundation is HTML and it's rock-solid!".
Get's caught taking home onions and milk from the kitchen.
Is spotted eating in a restaurant under our offices in his day off. Thrice. He lives a 30 minute drive away and comes here on a bicycle or by bus.
Apparently didn't know that the scrolling wheel on the mouse is clickable.
Said that his PC experience is mostly from his PlayStation (PC = PlayCtation apparently).
Get's fired, says that he'll go to the press. Never does.
Case 1:
Yet another new intern. He seems very eager to learn and work, capable, even charismatic. Has an impressive CV.
Does nothing.
Learns from the "case 0" guy and spends time with him until he is fired.
Comes to work at 8:00 AM and immediately goes to sleep on an office puff. In front of everyone.
Keeps dining alone, without a notice, at different times, for hours. Sometimes brings food into the office and loudly eats it there.
On his evening shifts keeps disappearing for long periods of time. Apparently drinking in the nearby bars and hitting on girls.
Keeps bragging about his success with getting their numbers and rants about those who reject him.
For over a year he fails his final training test and remains a trainee, without the ability to work on a real case.
Not fired yet.
Case 2:
Company retreat. Beautiful, exotic views, warm sun beams, all inclusive package for everyone on a huge half-island.
Simon (he's still with us, now as a true engineer!) brings his MacBook to the beach in order to work and impress all others.
Everybody get's drunk and start throwing huge inflatable balls at each other. One hits his laptop and it immediately is flattened.
Upset Simon is going in circles and ranting about the situation, looking for a solution.
Loses his phone on the beach.
Takes his broken laptop with him while searching for the phone.
Dips the laptop in the river while drunkenly ducking in order to pick a clam.
Case 3:
Still company retreat.
Drunk intern makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Huge verbal fight. The husband says that he files for a divorce. Intern get's fired.
Case 4:
Still company retreat.
Three interns each take an inflatable swimming mattress and drift with the current. Get found on the other side of the resort three hours later, with red skin and severely dehydrated.
Case 5:
Still company retreat.
The 'informally fired' intern gets drunk again, climbs through a window into a room and makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Again, gets caught when the husband returns to find a locked door but can see them though the window.
Case 6:
Still company retreat.
We all get ferociously drunk and wander off to the unknown in search of more booze.
Everybody does something stupid and somebody finds Simon's phone.
Simon is lost.
Frenzied horde of drunks is roaming the half-island in search of ethanol and the lost comrade.
Simon's phone get's permanently lost.
Five people step on sea urchins but find that out only hours later and then are unable to walk.
The mob, now including more drunk people who joined voluntarily, finds the sexually active intern making out with the enraged employee's wife yet again.
Surprisingly Simon is found sleeping in a room nearby.24 -
0. Plan before you code. Document everything. You won't remember either your idea or those clever implementations next week (or next month, or next year...).
1. Don't hack your way through, unless that's what you intend to do. Name your variables, functions etc. neatly: autocomplete exists!
Protip: Sometimes you want to check a quick language feature or a piece of code from one of your modules. Resist the urge to quickly hack in the test into your actual project. Maintain a separate file where you can quickly type in and check what you're looking for without hacking on your project (For example, in Python, you can open a new terminal or IDLE window for those quick tests).
2. Keep a quiet environment where you can focus. Recommend listening to something while coding (my latest fad is on asoftmurmur.com). Don't let anything distract you and throw your contextual awareness out of whack.
3. Rubber ducks work. Really. Talking out a complex piece of logic, or that regex or SQL query aids your mind greatly in grasping the concept and clearing the idea. Bounce off code and ideas with a friend or colleague to catch errors and oversights faster. Read more here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
4. Since everyone else is saying this (and because it merits saying), USE VERSION CONTROL. Singular most important thing to software development aside from planning and documenting.
5. Remember to flout all of the above once in a while and just make a mess of a project where you have fun throwing everything around all over the place. You'll make mistakes that you never thought were possible by someone of your caliber :) That's how you learn.
Have fun, keep learning!3 -
TL;DR: Don't ever interrupt me while taking a shit.
>be me taking a shit comfortably in the bathroom, not bothering anyone
>hear my cousin outside calling his gf
>nofsgiven.jpg
>suddenly stuff comes flying through the window and hear her gf laughing in his phone speaker
>stupid asshat was trying to make his gf laugh by bothering me while in the debug room
>scream from the top of my lungs for him to stop interrupting my defecation process
>stuff keeps coming from the window
>my brown creation comes back inside like a scared turtle
>pull up pantaloons
>get out of thinking room
>open up laptop, start ubuntu
>sudo apt-get install aircrack-ng
>enable monitor mode, get phone, ap mac addresses
>vim shittyvengeance.sh
>write small script that deauths his phone and then waits some seconds and then starts over again so he doesn't think it's me
>:wq and make script executable
>sleep 180; cowsay ding dong ur vengeance has arrived; sudo ./shittyvengeance.sh
>tuck into bed and close laptop before sleep time ends
>his call suddenly drops
>"Matt are you messing up with my WiFi again?"
>"Nah man. Not working for me either. Must be localcompany's problem."
>mfw he can't talk with his gf for more than 15 seconds before losing connection
>omgitworks.jpg
>figure that it was the most useful thing I had made in a pc in these two years at uni
>be proud of me for making a stupid script
>think about going back to my pearl white throne
>no longer wanting to drop my supplies
>go to sleep
>mfw forgot to wipe ass
My first story in devRant! Was lurking for quite a while and finally felt like sharing something 🙃24 -
6pm - arrive home from work, log into my computer and start working on side projects.
4am - Finally go to sleep after staying up all night setting up arch in a vm.
7am - Start drive to work in the snow and ice.
7:20am - car runs out of wiper fluid.
7:30am - round corner so that I’m driving towards the sun, windshield is covered in mud and I have 2% visibility.
7:35am - take off ramp towards gas station so I can buy fluid and wash window.
7:36am - Car mysteriously parked in center of off ramp, nearly smash it but have a narrow miss.
7:40am - can’t find the freaking pully in new car to pop hood
7:41am - found it.
7:50am - drove the back way to work because it cuts out traffic, but includes many steep hills that I forgot existed, come to a skid at bottom of one and am pushed out into the main road, luckily nobody is coming and I’m able to continue on my merry way.
8:01am - sit down in desk, lead staff person comes over evoking Lumbergh from Office Space and lets me know I need to be on time to work and that the snow doesn’t give me an excuse. I agree and smile and suck up and he leaves.
8:02am - pull out phone to write down notes about personal project that I thought of on drive here, phone dies. I forgot to plug it in last night.
8:04am - found power bank charger thing in desk but it uses a micro-b type usb and I only have usb type c on me.
8:10am - borrow usb from old headset in office surplus.
8:11am - writing notes. Have sudden realization that I didn’t shut down my vm and that when my computer went to sleep and subsequently locked it probably halted virtualbox and everything would be lost for the second time.
8:12am - got on devRant.4 -
First internship (ranted about it before).
- Had to google translate their entire internal crm.
- pointed out major security flaws and got a speech saying that "I shouldn't think so high of myself and I didn't have the fucking right to criticize their products"
- every time the boss came to the office after a failed sales presentation, we (interns) got called the most nasty stuff. Yes. We didn't have anything to do with that at all.
- I had "hygiene issues": window to the south with 35-40 degrees (Celsius) feeling temperature and no airco. Deo didn't really make a difference but wasn't allowed to use it there anyways. Details: I have a transpiration issue so I sweat shitloads more than other people, that didn't help at all.
- nearly got fired because I had to to to the doctor in company time for a serious health issue.
- was (no kidding) REQUIRES to use internet explorer and we were monitored constantly.
Self esteem dropped through the fucking ground there.12 -
*loud thud*
That was my productivity falling out a window. I just found a shit load of bubble wrap lying around!
Safe to say, productivity efficiently ruined.19 -
A Geologist and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.1 -
I go to unlock my car, but the button I usually use is gone. Instead now it unlocks by long-pressing the car handle.
Ok, got it.
Then my ignition isn't there? Oh, it's in the middle of the steering wheel now? Ok.. but it doesn't work? Oh I have to sign in with Google or Facebook, alright...
Wait, where's my odometer? Oh this is "card" view, and I guess I want "compact" view, huh. Is there a dark theme? Guess not.
Why can't I shift? Oh the stick is a hamburger button now, weird. Um, and reverse is in a sub-menu? That's going to get annoying.
Alright just need to look in the mirror to see if.. wtf? You call this "responsive" or something? I can't see out that tiny window.
I'm very disappointed in all this, I wonder if I can roll back. Oh WHERE ARE THE BRAKES OH GOD
UX DESIGNERS
HAVE
FUCKING
KILLED ME
WHY DID WE TRUST THEM AND THEIR GODFORSAKEN UPDATES10 -
During a penetration test, I was dropped off in a Navy SEAL Ranger Black Hawk helicopter on the top of a 300 story building. I repelled to the 150th floor with fishing line, carved out a window, and installed Kali on the office door knob. I then typed out l337 HTML code in notepad and gained access to the mainframe. Then, some guy named John McClane wouldn't stop asking me for advice as I roped down the elevator shaft cable. I then walked outside, got my shoe shined, and the CEOs daughter came up to me saying she wants to take me to dinner because I'm the most l337 of the l337.11
-
Found out the most interesting window of the century!!!
Though the user forgot to keep it in full screen mode.
Outside world - Real Life 2.0 (reallife2.exe)
Source: Instagram14 -
Today I needed the scroll lock key.
I was running a super long test suite, one which puts a green dot on the screen every 500ms, so you can't scroll up. I needed to view some output of an earlier command... in other words, I needed to lock the automatic scrolling of the terminal.
That is what the scroll lock key was made for.
A momentous occasion.
Then I found out that a while ago, I used the macro function of my keyboard to rebind the that key... to close the current terminal window. 😡7 -
*spends 40 minutes modifying and remodifying algorithm*
*gets the same output*
....
*checks print statement*
print localVariable
*throws keyboard out the window*4 -
I was sleeping.....
May dad was feeding our newly furnished outer walls of our house with water....
I was unaware of what he was doing...
I dont know what exactly he was supposed to do....
But when I opened my eyes....
I saw a stream of water straight way coming from the window entering my cpu which was placed on a table exactly at the window....
I shouted out as loud as possible....
I was so lucky I previous night I turned it off shut off the switches cuz there was nothing to download....
I deassembled whole cpu kept it for 3 days to dry....
And bam it worked like a charm....
Saved my entire life....15 -
Attended one of the best meetups ever. To give you an idea how awesome it was..
Speaker took the first ~20 minutes introducing himself.
His intro card deck kept referring to himself in the third person (he is the only employee in consulting 'company'). Ex. "Mr. Smith began his humble career .."
The powerpoint presentation began with him clicking each page, not executing the slideshow (ex. pressing F5).
Finally someone asked "Can you make slide bigger?"
S:"You can't read that?..um..sure...I guess .."
Starts fumbling around the zoom ...
Dev: "No, can you start the slideshow?"
S: "I don't know what you mean...there...I zoomed it, is that better? Now I can't see my notes..just sec.."
<fumbles again with the zoom>
Dev: "No, not zoom, start the slide show, press F5"
S: "Oh...you want me to F5 it...OK..."
<he *clicks* the slide show button>
Finally getting into code, trying to get out of powerpoint ...
S: "How do I get out of this fullscreen?.."
Dev: "Hit escape"
S:"No..um.."
<keeps trying to click on 'something'>
S:"I see visual studio, but its not on the big screen... "
<keeps click on 'something', no one is sure whats going on>
Dev: "Hit Escape to stop the slideshow"
<finally hits escape, then able to put Visual Studio on the big screen>
S: "Ahh...there, I figured it out."
Speaker had no end of making wild/random statements like:
".Net Core is the future of Microsoft, if you're using .Net 4.5...forget it, its not even supported anymore."
"When I was at Microsoft Build, I asked them why not put all the required .Net assemblies in one directory. Looks like with .Net Core, they listened to me" (he was serious)
"I don't use SQL Server Mgmt Studio. Its free and it sucks. I use <insert a very expensive SSMS clone>, its great, you guys should check it out", then proceeds to struggle to open a query window to write some SQL.
"When you use .Net Core and EntityFramework, you have to write your own stored procedures. If a developer can't write stored procedures, he shouldn't be in this business."
I was on the edge of my seat, hungry for the next crazy bat-shit thing to come out of his mouth. He did not disappoint. BEST MEETUP EVER!9 -
"Can you make it pop more..."
A moment of silence please, for the same fucking, irritating word that every goddamn Joe, Jim and Jenny uses for describing how a site should look. What the hell is pop supposed to mean, you want an epilepsy warning I'll put some popping lights and nausea inducing Nyan cats across your screen. You want it to pop more, sure no problem...
There's a window over there, go fucking throw your PC out of it.11 -
Headphones are in, colleague calls my name, I take them out a little annoyed at the interruption.
Colleague: what did one window say to the other?
Me: you're such a pane you know that?
Colleague: no but fuck! That's better1 -
That moment when you realize that you are workaholic, make final push to your personal project, hide computer away, and gaze out of the window, realizing that you are nothing without computer.5
-
In the school we were using slow PCs for learning MS Office things. Every single step we did took ages. There were one guy who was an informatics antitalent: he never were able to work fluently with any electric machine from a microwave to anything smarter. In addition he was a semi-pro athlete and he had some kind of anger management issues, sometimes yelled to the teacher after a bad mark or with us when we lost a in-school soccer match. You know, he was that competitive guy.
One time on computer science class he was very focused. He tried to follow every steps precisly and his machine seemed faster than as usual. He felt like he broke some kind of wall which was between he and the machine.
When we had a break and he went out we tought that we should make a prank. We made a fullscreen screenshot from the desktop and set it as the wallpaper, then killed explorer.exe. As a result the icons and the start menu was only on the screen by the wallpaper.
When he came back he said that there were some bad news from some of the sport event he wanted to go, so he was angry. But then... You know the gif when the guy first hit the side of the screen multiple times then throws out the machine? Yeah, we saw that in real life, but not in that office. First he was just clicking everywhere, we just watched how his face just transforming. Then he started to talk just in himself as the machine could understand. After two minutes he just yelled to the machine why did it freeze, but the last drop was when the teacher said: You'll have to send me your work and it will be marked. In this moment he was just roard a huge and droped the CRT out of the window from the second floor. Luckily the window was facing to a brushy part of the garden so no one was there. He just standed there, looked out to the CRT sitting in a brush for a while, then he turned to the teacher as "Mr, I think something is wrong with my machine"3 -
When I downloaded a virus that turned out to be a troll. It spawned some windows with 'Trololololo...' flashed blue and red and jumped random on the screen while playing troll music.
Closing one window would lead to that window beeing duplicated.
When I got into coding, one of my first projects was a recreation of this.1 -
So this happened to me today.
After spending the whole night coding / watching Netflix I was sitting in my chair and looking at my screen with VSCode (dark theme of course) open. It was pretty dark in my room because the only source of light was my computer screen, which was still pretty dark because of the dark theme.
So, while looking at my code I suddenly noticed that the room had gotten a bit brighter. I wondered wtf was going on.
I looked out the window and saw that the sun was rising. Then I looked at the clock:
5:30 am.
Me: 'oh, lol'14 -
Last weekend I witnessed the most infected computer I have ever seen in my life...
I went on a private party. A girl had her laptop plugged to the speakers to play some music. This thing was literally 99% cancer. The first thing I noticed, when I looked at her opened browser, was that nearly half the screen was taken by toolbars. Also any popular website you could visit had additional ads INJECTED into it. The fist 10 YouTube search results: always porn. No idea how that didn't make her suspicious.
Precisely every 10th click (anywhere not only in the browser) would open up a window with either more ads or an aggressively blinking message saying: "A virus has been detected on your machine. Click here to download our antivirus programm. You have 60 seconds left before your firewall breaks!!!".
Also physically this device was on the edge of completely broken. The power supply had to be taped to the socket because it was so loose. Every little jiggle would immediatly shut the system down and Windows had to be completely reinstalled (which of course didn't solved any of the "software issues").
First I wanted to use that laptop to show some friends a new web project of mine but this thing probably would have DDoSed the shit out of my recently finished work or something.
I couldn't decide if I should laugh or cry...9 -
The stupid stories of how I was able to break my schools network just to get better internet, as well as more ridiculous fun. XD
1st year:
It was my freshman year in college. The internet sucked really, really, really badly! Too many people were clearly using it. I had to find another way to remedy this. Upon some further research through Google I found out that one can in fact turn their computer into a router. Now what’s interesting about this network is that it only works with computers by downloading the necessary software that this network provides for you. Some weird software that actually looks through your computer and makes sure it’s ok to be added to the network. Unfortunately, routers can’t download and install that software, thus no internet… but a PC that can be changed into a router itself is a different story. I found that I can download the software check the PC and then turn on my Router feature. Viola, personal fast internet connected directly into the wall. No more sharing a single shitty router!
2nd year:
This was about the year when bitcoin mining was becoming a thing, and everyone was in on it. My shitty computer couldn’t possibly pull off mining for bitcoins. I needed something faster. How I found out that I could use my schools servers was merely an accident.
I had been installing the software on every possible PC I owned, but alas all my PC’s were just not fast enough. I decided to try it on the RDS server. It worked; the command window was pumping out coins! What I came to find out was that the RDS server had 36 cores. This thing was a beast! And it made sense that it could actually pull off mining for bitcoins. A couple nights later I signed in remotely to the RDS server. I created a macro that would continuously move my mouse around in the Remote desktop screen to keep my session alive at all times, and then I’d start my bitcoin mining operation. The following morning I wake up and my session was gone. How sad I thought. I quickly try to remote back in to see what I had collected. “Error, could not connect”. Weird… this usually never happens, maybe I did the remoting wrong. I went to my schools website to do some research on my remoting problem. It was down. In fact, everything was down… I come to find out that I had accidentally shut down the schools network because of my mining operation. I wasn’t found out, but I haven’t done any mining since then.
3rd year:
As an engineering student I found out that all engineering students get access to the school’s VPN. Cool, it is technically used to get around some wonky issues with remoting into the RDS servers. What I come to find out, after messing around with it frequently, is that I can actually use the VPN against the screwed up security on the network. Remember, how I told you that a program has to be downloaded and then one can be accepted into the network? Well, I was able to bypass all of that, simply by using the school’s VPN against itself… How dense does one have to be to not have patched that one?
4th year:
It was another programming day, and I needed access to my phones memory. Using some specially made apps I could easily connect to my phone from my computer and continue my work. But what I found out was that I could in fact travel around in the network. I discovered that I can, in fact, access my phone through the network from anywhere. What resulted was the discovery that the network scales the entirety of the school. I discovered that if I left my phone down in the engineering building and then went north to the biology building, I could still continue to access it. This seems like a very fatal flaw. My idea is to hook up a webcam to a robot and remotely controlling it from the RDS servers and having this little robot go to my classes for me.
What crazy shit have you done at your University?9 -
15 mins after finding out a critical bug (we are releasing 3 days from now)
Me: Have u found the root cause of the bug?
Teammate: Yes
Me: So, are we fucked?
Teammate: Teammate is typing...
Me:
*Closes chat window*
*Locks the computer*
*Flies back to home country*3 -
Recruiter: So you’re in Canada?
Dev: One sec let me check
*Points webcam out window at ongoing blizzard*
Dev: Yup, that looks like Canada to me
Recruiter: Ok I am just confirming
Dev: Me too8 -
> Open Quora
> Read highly upvoted answer that in essence says "ping - t localhost to make internet speed faster by 'sucking the wifi'"
> Realize that senior at office has upvoted it
> Jump out of the window2 -
Ok I have 2 more hours to work today. I bet I will get these 3 important things done.
*important email comes in*
*laptop runs out of batery*
*client finally calls back after 4 weeks*
*data structure has to be reorganized urgently due to new requirements*
After dealing with all of that, I close all windows in order to go home. The last window is the thing I wanted to do in the first place.1 -
Spent more than an hour on client's computer trying to figure out why it was rendering a font in bold, while every other device I tried (even with same browser/OS/screen DPI) rendered it in normal weight. Google Fonts were loading fine. After banging my head into TeamViewer window for the Nth time, I found the problem. The font was installed on client's computer locally, so it was overriding remotely loaded Google Fonts. What's the problem then? The local version only had bold version.
Deleting the local font fixed it.7 -
KISS.
Keep it simple, stupid.
At the beginning the project is nothing but an idea. If you get it off the ground, that's already a huge success. Rich features and code quality should be the last of your worries in this case.
Throw out any secondary functionality out the window from day 0. Make it work, then add flowers and shit (note to self: need to make way for flowers and shit).
Nevertheless code quality is an important factor, if you can afford it. The top important things I outline in any new non-trivial project:
1. Spend 1-2 days bootstrapping it for best fit to the task, and well designed security, mocking, testing and extensibility.
2. Choose a stack that you'll most likely find good cheap devs for, in that region where you'll look in, but also a stack that will allow you to spend most of your time writing software rather than learning to code in it.
3. Talk to peers. Listen when they tell that your idea is stupid. Listen to why it's stupid, re-assess, because it most probably is stupid in this case.
4. Give yourself a good pep talk every morning, convincing you that the choices you've made starting this project are the right ones and that they'll bring you to success. Because if you started such a project already, the most efficient way to kill it is to doubt your core decisions.
Once it's working badly and with a ton of bugs, you've already succeeded in actually making it work, and then you can tackle the bugs and improvements.
Some dev is going to hate you for creating something horrific, but that horrific thing will work, and it's what will give another developer a maintenance job. Which is FAR, far more than most would get by focusing on quality and features from day 0.9 -
Part of the new hire process was all salaried employees had to work all hourly position jobs for a day (over a several week period, not all in one day) to really understand what we do.
I once hazed a new network admin who was working in the call center and I sent his station a pop-up message:
“Ha! Fire me will you!! I planted this virus and if you don’t enter the password in 60 seconds I will erase the database.” The pop-up had a counter counting down from 60.
This was over the lunch hour, so all the supervisors and managers were away and ‘Mark’ in a panic ran into our office (I was hiding under my desk)
Mark: GUYS!!...GUYS!!!....OMG!….Where the frack is everybody?!!!”
He runs out.
I peek out the door window and about a second later he’s running down the hall with one of the vice presidents. Mark shows the VP the message, VP looks over at our office, sees me…laughs and walks back to his office (not saying much to Mark).
Mark not knowing what’s going on watches the counter…3...2…1….
”Just kidding. Welcome to the company!”
Ahhh…the repeated sounds of “You son of a -bleep-!!” never sounded so sweet.1 -
The hardest part of programming is not the inner workings of the chosen frameworks and tech.
It's the damn naming.
I will spend hours trying to figure out what to name things for sense and clarity and then a fraction of that time coding it together.
*me, staring out the window*
"Hey dude can you--"
"Ssshhh. I'm naming things."15 -
ANTI VIRUSES AREN'T ALWAYS YOUR FRIEND!
So I'm under a little pressure to get an assignment done so I came home an was planning on working on it but Windows had other plans and decided to finish its update which I suspect copied my hard drive and uploaded it to the NSA at dial up speed because it it forever!!
But anyway back to the text in caps lock... I started working on it then when I hit compile I got an "access denied" error in the console and didn't know what the f*** was going on. So I decided to copy my filed to another directory and tried again... amazingly this worked so I carried on and after about 2 hours I get the same error -_- So instead of messing around and loosing my work I decided to commit it... but I cant... again "access denied" error.
After threatening my computer with a trip out the window, I finally decided to reboot it... cause "have you tried turning it off and on again" kept on rattling in my head.
After logging in I tried again and still the same error... Then I opened up my anti virus dashboard and went through the logs and found the screen shot attached.....19 -
A Geologist and a developer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the developer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Developer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Developer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Developer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Developer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the developer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The developer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the developer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the developer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.3 -
My girlfriend always wanted to have kids while I don't want any, when she does eventually talk about having kids I'll make her this deal "I'll give you a kid if you can close this vim window with out googling how to do it"
It's fail proof9 -
Best non-technical description of why we hate to post in forums (shamelessly copied from Shamus Youngs blog found here: http://shamusyoung.com/twentysidedt...) ->
ALLEN: Hi, I’m new to driving and I need to move my car back around 5 meters. How can I move the car backwards?
(2 days later.)
ALLEN: Hello? This is still a problem. I’m sure someone knows how to do this.
BOB: I can’t believe you didn’t figure this out yourself. Just take your foot off the gas and let the car roll backwards down the hill. Tap the bake when you get to where you want to be. Boom. Done.
ALLEN: But I’m not on a hill. I’m in my driveway and it’s completely flat.
CARL: Dude, I don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish, but you should never be driving backwards. It’s dangerous and will confuse the other drivers. See the big window in FRONT of you? That’s your first clue. Don’t drive backwards.
ALLEN: I’m not trying to drive backwards. I just need to move back a little bit so I can get out of my driveway and start driving forwards.
CARL: So just drive in circle until you’re pointed the right way.
ALLEN: I don’t have enough room to turn around like that. I only need to move back a few meters. I don’t understand why this has to be so hard.
CARL: Sounds like your “driveway” isn’t compatible with cars. It’s probably made for bikes. Call a contractor and have them convert some of your yard into driveway to be standards-compliant with the turning radius of a car. Either way, you’re doing something wrong.
DAVE: I see your problem. You can adjust your car to move backwards by using the shifter. It’s a stick located right between the passenger and driver seats. Apply the clutch and move the stick to the “R” position.
ALLEN: But.. I don’t have a clutch. And there isn’t a stick between the seats.
CARL: Sounds like you’re trying to drive in Europe or something.
ALLEN: Ah. Nevermind. I figured it out.8 -
Sending one big PDF with character analysises of everyone in the company to all of us, from apprentice to founder. He had even brought cake, but the boss threw it out the window and made the guy leave the moment he read that mail 😂3
-
I got a design from designer on making a website. I made it responsive all the way to screens as wide as 2000px.
Designer: Why didn’t you follow my design. The site is so wide now on my screen. Can you follow my design?
Me: So limit the site to a max width of 700px as per you design.
Designer: yes please
Me: ok.
[ A week later]
Designer: Just checked out the site on a wide screen. It looks so empty. Can we do something to make the content fit to the window so it looks less empty on a wide screen?
Me: 🤨🖕🏽6 -
The tech stack at my current gig is the worst shit I’ve ever dealt with...
I can’t fucking stand programs, especially browser based programs, to open new windows. New tab, okay sure, ideally I just want the current tab I’m on to update when I click on a link.
Ticketing system: Autotask
Fucking opens up with a crappy piss poor sorting method and no proper filtering for ticket views. Nope you have to go create a fucking dashboard to parse/filter the shit you want to see. So I either have to go create a metric-arse tonne of custom ticket views and switch between them or just use the default turdburger view. Add to that that when I click on a ticket, it opens another fucking window with the ticket information. If I want to do time entry, it just feels some primal need to open another fucking window!!! Then even if I mark the ticket complete it just minimizes the goddamn second ticket window. So my jankbox-supreme PC that my company provided gets to strugglepuff along trying to keep 10 million chrome windows open. Yeah, sure 6GB of ram is great for IT work, especially when using hot steaming piles of trashjuice software!
I have to manually close these windows regularly throughout the day or the system just shits the bed and halts.
RMM tool: Continuum
This fucker takes the goddamn soggy waffle award for being utterly fucking useless. Same problem with the windows as autotask except this special snowflake likes to open a login prompt as a full-fuck-mothering-new window when we need to open a LMI rescue session!!! I need to enter a username and a password. That’s it! I don’t need a full screen window to enter credentials! FUCK!!! Btw the LMI tools only work like 70% of the time and drag ass compared to literally every other remote support tool I’ve ever used. I’ve found that it’s sometimes just faster to walk someone through enabling RDP on their system then remoting in from another system where LMI didn’t decide to be fully suicidal and just kill itself.
Our fucking chief asshat and sergeant fucknuts mcdoogal can’t fucking setup anything so the antivirus software is pushed to all client systems but everything is just set to the default site settings. Absolutely zero care or thought or effort was put forth and these gorilla spunk drinking, rimjob jockey motherfuckers sell this as a managed AntiVirus.
We use a shitty password manager than no one besides I use because there is a fully unencrypted oneNote notebook that everyone uses because fuck security right? “Sometimes it’s just faster to have the passwords at the ready without having to log into the password manager.” Chief Asshat in my first week on the job.
Not to mention that windows server is unlicensed in almost every client environment, the domain admin password is same across multiple client sites, is the same password to log into firewalls, and office 365 environments!!!
I’ve brought up tons of ways to fix these problems, but they have their heads so far up their own asses getting high on undeserved smugness since “they have been in business for almost ten years”. Like, Whoop Dee MotherFucking Doo! You have only been lucky to skate by with this dumpster fire you call a software stack, you could probably fill 10 olympic sized swimming pools to the brim with the logarrhea that flows from your gullets not only to us but also to your customers, and you won’t implement anything that is good for you, your company, or your poor clients because you take ten minutes to try and understand something new.
I’m fucking livid because I’m stuck in a position where I can’t just quit and work on my business full time. I’m married and have a 6m old baby. Between both my wife and I working we barely make ends meet and there’s absolutely zero reason that I couldn’t be providing better service to customers without having to lie through my teeth to them and I could easily support my family and be about 264826290461% happier!
But because we make so little, I can’t scrap together enough money to get Terranimbus (my startup) bootstrapped. We have zero expendable/savable income each month and it’s killing my soul. It’s so fucking frustrating knowing that a little time and some capital is all that stands between a better life for my family and I and being able to provide a better overall service out there over these kinds of shady as fuck knob gobblers.5 -
FUCK YOU TICKETMASTER AND YOUR SHITTY WEBSITE.
Why can't you process my request during an EXPECTED WINDOW OF HIGH TRAFFIC?!
DO YOU EVEN LOAD BALANCE, BRO?!
I missed my chance to buy some Hans Zimmer tickets for the ONLY time I've ever seen him listed in my city. I had the tickets in my cart, but it errored out upon checking out. Then, every other attempt to search for tickets resulted in an error.
GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!!!!
One day, Hans... One day I will see you. 😢14 -
Dev: This could be sooooo easily optimized...
Me: Uhm. Don't think so. What's your idea?
Dev: Just use threads.
Me: Nope. Problem requires 3 shared resources per process step, it won't be faster by threading. Shared resource will only lead to locking contention, decreasing performance.
Dev: I don't think that will happen. Can you PROOF to ME that this will happen?
Me: It was your suggestion, so you should proof me wrong. Nice try, but no thanks.
Dev: Yeah, but it's too slow and it should run faster.
Me: If you cannot find a better approach than the current one, it runs as fast as it can while providing correct results. That's not slow. That's just working as intended and designed.
Dev: Yeah, but it's still slow.
....
You know these conversations where you just wanna rip some people's face off, stick it in the shit hole they use to talk and toss them out of the window....
Yeah. Had those conversations today.10 -
WTF - I discovered that wasps listen to me!
Earlier when one came in, I tried to catch it with a glass and release it, or kill it if that wasn't feasible. This year, I tried pointing to the window and ordering "get out!" just because I was too lazy to take action. Of course, I didn't expect it to work, but it did. I thought it was only a coincidence, so I kept trying it. It works every single time!
Crazy shit!13 -
Racism is still a thing in Germany...
At 11 am, I parked my car in to the right parking lane. It didn't cross any line. A woman in her 50s had the door to my side open and still didn't decide to close it, when I was parking.
Anyways, I got ready to get out of the car. All of the sudden, she knocked on my door. I did open the window.
[Short break: S=She and M=Me]
*Dialogue starts here*
S: How dare you park here?! Over there *points to the next parking slots next to her car* is enough place for your car.
M: I am allowed to park here. Plus, I am not crossing your lane. Aside from that, your door was open. Close the door first (before you fucking yell at me, you bitch - I didn't say this tho.).
S *completely ignores what I just said and focuses on my first phrase*: Of course, you are allowed to park here. But you are also allowed to go back to Turkey! *goes back to her car*
M *completely shocked and thinks about what I have been doing wrong and how Turkey is even related to this parking situation*: FUCK OFF!
*notes her license plate*
*finally gets out of the car. locks it. walks slowly in front of her car, when she just wants to drive away from the parking slot just to annoy the shit out of her with a big ass grin in my face waving at her*36 -
So I looked at our dashboard and noticed a banner mentioning scheduled maintenance set for 7:00 AM. And I thought to myself, "I never released an update, and even if I had, the maintenance would be performed 15 minutes after the build finished, not at 7:00 AM." So I emailed my coworkers, asking if they had put up the banner, no, no. I started pulling my hair out trying to figure out what caused this banner to be created. Was there some old job that was just now running? I combed through the server logs, thousands of entries later, and I found the banner was installed by some user with the IP 172.18.0.1...which was the local machine. I went through all the users on the system, running atq to see if anyone had jobs scheduled. And there was one job scheduled, under the root user. At that moment, I legit thought to myself, "have we been hacked? How is that possible?" It's wasn't! Then I looked under /var/spool/atjobs to see what the job actually was. And then I saw it. My weekly updater cron job had installed updates and had scheduled a maintenance window to reboot the system. And I smiled, realizing that my code was now sentient.
-
"There is a problem with A, could you check it out? It's urgent for the client"
Me: Okay, just open a ticket for it too.
*Working on A"
After about ten minutes:
"Hey, there is a small problem B and it's also urgent for the client, we need you to check it out"
Me: I'm working on A and you are yet to open a tick... (Interrupted)
"But it's urgent and it's a small fix, we can fix it and push it to prod, A can wait for a bit"
(Since when is it a "we"?)
Me: *sigh* fine, lets see what's B is all about...
*After going over problems C to Z*
"Why isn't A ready yet? The client's mad and it was to be ready as of today"
Me: Because you had problems from B to Z and they were all urgent according to you so after each request you asked of me I had to postpone A with you knowing about it.
"But A is for today!"
FUCK YOU, YOU WORTHLESS WASTE OF JIZZ! YOU RAN TO ME FOR EVERY GOD DAMN URGENT PROBLEM YOU HAD FROM OUR SHIT OF A CLIENT AND INSTEAD OF TELLING ME THE PRIORITY YOU JUST THROWN IT ALL IN A RANDOM ORDER!
FUCK YOU! I WISH YOUR FATHER WOULD'VE SHOT YOU OUT THE WINDOW INSTEAD OF INSIDE YOUR MOTHERS CUNT!5 -
I am on the fucking verge of throwing my coffee cup at a coworker.
I am sitting in an office with someone who has to vocalise everything that he thinks.
It started this morning, I was trying to solder the board on my headphones, because there was a cable that had come loose, and every fucking time that I start, some shithead phones, and then a few minutes later, he comes in and talks shit. Burnt myself.
Now I am trying to maintain some code, and every fucking time I start typing and getting into my code, the need to talk has to fucking arise. I have literally thrown the last 45 minutes out of the window because I cannot fucking concentrate. Nothing helps. Throwing a coffee cup will probably just inspire more to talk about.
Phenomenal, another motherfucker just came into my office and decided that it is decent to use the phone to phone his buddies.
Fuck this shit.10 -
Client : hey why does your app minimize once I receive a call? Fix this ASAP! Also why does it show *that*? I have not turned anything on!
Me : Sorry, not possible (explains), you might want to contact Google (for the lolz). Also, the feature is shown by default, you can turn it off via Menu - Settings - Navigation - xxx.
Client : Can you make the incoming call popup smaller when using your app?
Me : Unfortunately no, that's not something I can do. Contact LG.
Client : I have been to Menu - Settings - Map - XXX and the feature is still shown, why does your software not work? Also *this and that* is not shown anymore!
Me : You turned off the wrong thing... *jumps out of the window* *contemplates life* *cries* *dies* -
Shit! I knew buzzwords were overused, but I just saw an ad and it is fucking jesused jambled bananas in the ass.
Starts with a woman looking out the window and there’s a tornado (seems ok for now)
The tornado approaches and IT IS MADE OF FUCKING NON MONOSPACED IN MY ASS FONTED 0s AND 1s. Bonus point: they are green !!
Switches to lines of GREEN code (kill my fucking brain with a pistol attached to your dick right now)
Probably JS or something similar in syntax.
And then: A FUCKING GUY LEANING OVER POINTING SOMETHING ON THE SCREEN! HIS NAMETAG:
Logan Paul
Blockchain
👏👏👏👏
And then some other buzzing asses armagedon en d of the fucking world bleeding edge vibrator buzzwords shenanigans.
Finishes with drones shot flying between businesses building with 3d floating words like
Blockchain!
Artificial Intelligence
Deep learning
Etc.
KILLLLLL MMMEEEE FU748-KFJV ING 3I6HT N0W $)&(&($8#;&(&8 jeiebcrandom ad wtf prefer fake news for ads over that kill me right now why am i watching tv seriously buzzwords13 -
Fucking airstrike alert this morning in my federal state.
Yote me out of bed yelling "The russians are coming!"
Turns out it was planned but what the fuck, the closest siren is like 100 metres from my window.14 -
Final exams are next week and I'm behind on studying...
If I uninstall devRant, I'll install it back. If I block it using clearlock, I'll find a way to bypass it.
I remember once I accidentally found a way to use devRant on multi window view. I might figure out how to do it again.
So... If you see me on devRant yell at me to get off. I'll be bitter at first, but appreciate it later :)
Oh, and feel free to be as mean as you want. The meaner you are, the less likely I'll go back on.22 -
(I am an entry-inter-intermediate level dev)
P = Person
P:Hey Can you build me a POS system for free?
Me: Yea whatever. (because... immediate family member)
P:Ok Great.
Me: *starts working on it.. almost done with inventory control and layouts in one night*
P: When will it be done? and I need it in a full screen window not a browser!!
Me: Soon..and I have not worked in ASP yet. So it will be a full screen browser app.
P: Aww you cant do it fast? You are not skilled enough??? Poor you, you are not good enough. I can do it in a few hours. Just write a C program which stores entries in a txt file. I dont want sql shes-que-el on my system. You dont want to use .txt because it will be harder for you. Poor you.. no skill.
Me: *raging to a level where i turn into kryptonium and burn superman to death but still keeping my calm* You will get it when you get it. Period
Inner Me: GO FUCK YOURSELF. IM DOING THIS FOR FREE SO THAT IT HELPS YOU OUT. NAGGING ME WONT HELP YOUR CAUSE ONE BIT. GO FUCKING LEARN HOW TO CODE YOURSELF AND MAKE IT YOURSELF OR BUY IT FOR A FUCK TON OF UNJUSTIFIED MONEY. IM GIVING YOU A BEAUTIFUL LAYOUT, GREAT APPLICATION ARCHITECTURE USING LARAVEL AND GREAT DATABASE DESIGN WHICH WOULD BE SCALABLE AND PRODUCE MEANINGFUL REPORTS. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PREFER A .TXT FILE OVER A WELL DESIGNED DATABASE. WOULD YOU FUCKING OPEN THAT HAMSTER CAGE OF A BRAIN OF YOURS WITH A KNIFE OR A SCREWDRIVER?
IF ITS THAT EASY FOR YOU GO FUCKING DO IT YOURSELF AND STOP BOTHERING ME. I AM TAKING MY TIME OUT FROM FREELANCING TO HELP YOU OUT. I COULD BE SPENDING THIS TIME ON OTHER PROJECTS WHICH WOULD GET ME SOMEWHERE. THE ONLY FUCKING REASON IM DOING IT BECAUSE I MIGHT BE ABLE TO RESELL THE POS (PIECE OF SHIT) TO OTHER PEOPLE IN FUTURE AND MAKE MY SHARE OF UNJUSTIFIED SHIT TON OF MONEY.14 -
Development plus laboratories is kind of my expertise, so I ended up in a little grimey HR office looking out over the factory floor of a cocoa processing facility. I was applying for an automation job, a temp thing for three weeks, updating some ugly scripts which took readings from machines and threw them into excel sheets.
"We don't think a developer like you has enough experience working in an environment like this. Safety and working in sterile conditions is very important to us"
I had sent them my certifications in advance, plus references to the work I did in a biosafety level 3 lab for JnJ and cleanroom work at an aerospace company.
There were fat sweaty guys on sneakers, taking cocoa paste samples right next to the window.
They ended up hiring a friend of mine with zero experience, for minimum wage.
Just be fucking honest, don't waste my time with courtesies and lies. If they had just told me about the low salary indication, I would still have done the work. I was in between jobs anyway, bored, trying to fill up some spare time.4 -
<rant>
I swear to god if see another "Here's how I made my amazing new website with Wixs" advert on Youtube, I'm going to throw my laptop out the god damn window!
</rant>8 -
Do you want to really annoy the hell out of someone?
Prerequisites:
1. JIRA account for you
2. JIRA account for the victim
3. JIRA app on victim's phone
Instructions below:
1. Create a ticket and assign / add victim as watcher.
2. Open your favorite IDE or editor with any of your favorite projects with lots of files with minimal sizes.
3. Drag the folder and drop into JIRA ticket window.
4. Enjoy 😎
Don't ask me how I figured this out 😁6 -
Round up kids.
I have a story to tell. The story of a war I've lost. Many battles were fought and many hours were wasted.
This is the story of wasp in a computer lab.
Today, the weather was good. So your old pal, Nomi, decided to open the windows. And as usual, that's where it all started.
So Nomi sat down and worked for a few hours. Tweaking two different neural nets, adding to its dimensions and concatenating the living shit out of the data they were supposed to process. After, she tried testing and testing and testing. It was early afternoon at this point and she was hungry. She went to close the windows and go for lunch.... When she realized, that she's not alone in the room. A big ass wasp was sitting on one of the curtains.
Now, Nomi doesn't have a good relationship with bugs and flying shit. Wait, no, she doesn't have a good relationship with moving things in general. So she panicked. She begged the wasp to leave. The wasp sat on the curtain and smirked at her. So after a while, she left the windows wide open, turned off the lights, put her hoodie on and went for lunch.
(btw, at this point my hoodie smells of sweat, fried onion, steak, cigarette and shisha. Don't ask. It was a long two weeks)
When she came back, the wasp was nowhere to be seen. So she assumed that the wasp got tired and left. But oh, how wrong she was.
After few hours, she heard something. She assumed it was just a fly. Actually, she hoped it was a fly and not the return of the wasp. But all her hopes were in vein.
She heard a buzz. And all of a sudden, an angry wasp flew in her direction. She dodged the attack and got under the table. But the wasp was not letting this go. Nomi jumped out of the room and left the door open. The wasp hid itself. She waited and waited but no sign of wasp. So she ran back in the room, and opened the window and ran back outside. She waited. The wasp occasionally would fly from one hideout to another. The wasp was making herself comfortable. At one point Nomi got angry and threw a shoe at the wasp, but the wasp caught the shoe and threw it back at her while maniacally laughing at her.
So she gave in. This was enough for the day. She ran back in, closed the window, turned off the computer, took her bag, turned off the light, and closed the door. All in less than 15 seconds. She came outside panicked and distressed, and now she's on her way home hoping that by tomorrow the wasp is gonna be dead.
The wasp and the robots are sitting alone in the lab tonight. I hope when the robots uprising happens, the robots can forgive me for abandoning them powerlessly with a wasp. 😟22 -
XCode.........pffft....... more like
Xcuse-me-while-I-hang-myself-while-you-Code
Or more like
Xcuse-me-while-I-crash-myself-while-you-Code
Or
Xcuse-me-while-I-make-you-angry-enough-to-throw-the-fucking-iMac-out-of-the-goddamn-window-while-you-Code
Like WTF, I got reassigned to iOS development after a year being in web development and was genuinely excited to work in swift again. The excitement quickly faded away, seeing the goddamn IDE struggle to compile or run. I dont remember facing these issues in version 7 or 8. FML ;-;5 -
Fucking windows! I am so fucking done with this microsoft bullshit!
Hear me out here, i am a gamer. I need windows because it has the games (and software to aid those games) unlike any other platform. But windows 10 is basically already phishing andmalware at this point. I stuck to win 7 because it had a start menu and didn't totally drive me up the wall.
Just a short list of their bullshits: ads in the explorer window, ads in your taskbar reminders, data mining like it is nobodies business and trying to hide it, sharing my wifi access with friends (wtf), the fucking retarded new start menu, the crappy fullscreen apps which have less functionality than the actual proper desktop applications that you need to config what you want, and even then pushing multiple updates that simply broke peoples pc's. Fuck that, ill stick to 7.
They are making win10 worse by the week making it unlikely i will ever join that hell, and they are also aiming to force me there. Making windows store exclusives and dx12 only games. What am i supposed to do against that?! The current releases don't bother me much but fuck i figure it is a matter of time until the newest katamari game is their exclusive and i nanananana katamari damacy all over their platform.
And well all alternative os's are just out of the question unless vulkan rendering gets the upper hand. Then i'd switch to whatever stable distro and learn about our new penguin based overlords languages.
For now i will just stick to win7, suck on my thumb while in fetal position and hope it just all goes away.59 -
Maybe this is my retribution for participating in yesterday's rant about public transportation.
Saturday morning, I had an 🥚and 🍌. I was happy.
I went out to meet with my GF.
I got a window seat on bus.
The seat on my left was empty for few stops.
A mudafucka big kid came and sit beside me.
I was like, cool, heyyo kid. Not some greasy old dudes or ready to slap chicks.
Oh boy can I be wronger?
The mudafucka big kid started with right butt scratch using right hand.
Then followed up by left butt scratch with left hand.
And then did a wiggly body scratching using his seat like an alien snake.
I got itchy looking at him.
Also I said big two times because he spread his big thighs so wide it took 1/3 of my seat.
And now playing loud ass games on his phone.
Not a good sign for my Saturday.1 -
Bipolar disorder means that you can code for 14 hours straight, sleep for 4 hours and feel refreshed ready for another round. You can make art and you can express your thoughts in creative, kinda alien ways.
But here are tradeoffs that make bipolar disorder a disease:
- everyone around you is an enemy
- they’re all acting together to harm you
- nobody understands you
- they all make fun of you
- if I say what I mean, nobody will understand me. I’ll scare them
- I’m extremely aggressive towards everything: people, things, situations, problems. Computer lags so I scream, smash it, throw it out of the window and buy a new overpriced one
- constant uncertainty about whether am I acting right or not19 -
Inappropriate experience at work? Here is another one:
The IS department manager 'John' bought a drone (when they first started getting popular, paid over $400 for it), flew it around the office, which was kinda fun, then he took it outside and started peeking in (and recording video) various VPs offices.
Needless to say, that behavior wasn't popular because several/most have their back to the window and never saw the drone and the drone was close enough to see/record their monitors (which John did). No one was doing anything wrong (no porn, no secret company plans, etc), but they were rightfully upset.
Later that day he decided to find out how high he could go and because of the technology at the time, it lost signal or battery power, fell from the sky, and before he could gain control, it crashed (styrofoam wings shattered). Can't say I felt sorry for him.5 -
I didnt understnd why people hated white themes because the are too bright, not untill I looked out of the window today and my eyes were bleeding because the snow made everything as bright as if I would stare into the sun!2
-
Interesting bug hunt!
Got called in because a co-team had a strange bug and couldn't make sense of it. After a compiler update, things had stopped working.
They had already hunted down the bug to something equivalent to the screenshot and put a breakpoint on the if-statement. The memory window showed the memory content, and it was indeed 42. However, the debugger would still jump over do_stuff(), both in single step and when setting a breakpoint on the function call. Very unusual, but the rest worked.
Looking closer, I noticed that the pointer's content was an odd number, but was supposed to be of type uint32_t *. So I dug out the controller's manual and looked up the instruction set what it would do with a 32 bit load from an unaligned address: the most braindead thing possible, it would just ignore the lowest two address bits. So the actual load happened from a different address, that's why the comparison failed.
I think the debugger fetched the memory content bytewise because that would work for any kind of data structure with only one code path, that's how it bypassed the alignment issue. Nice pitfall!
Investigating further why the pointer was off, it turned out that it pointed into an underlying array of type char. The offset into the array was correctly divisible by 4, but the beginning had no alignment, and a char array doesn't need one. I checked the mapfiles and indeed, the old compiler had put the array to a 4 byte boundary and the new one didn't.
Sure enough, after giving the array a 4 byte alignment directive, the code worked as intended.8 -
So this post is going to target an irritating aspect of a specific culture based on observational evidence over the last 20 years, and has reared its hideous face yet again. If you're triggered by that, stop reading here.
I'm flatly fed up with two-faced onshore Desi coworkers. They make up 95% of my colleagues and the following sequence of events has played out repeatedly over the course of my career, consistently, though it's slightly more pronounced in other women for whatever reason :
1. Work with them for years, good relationship, teach them all sorts of skills (which I will do freely for anyone, for any reasons as I view it to be a moral imperative), general lifting up and solid teamwork.
2. They move up in the hierarchy, generally to management, usually project
3. The second they view themselves as higher in the pecking order they start treating me like shit as if we have no history. Rude, commanding, unwilling to share details, obligatory exasperated thank yous if any at all, not interested in anything I have to say even if I'm the noted expert on the subject.
I understand a lot of their etiquette culture, specifically the level of "directness" or politeness they employ is based on the estimated risk of loss in the interaction. I find that disgusting, but I understand that academically. I just can't get my mind around how universal this shiftiness is, as it happens over and over again. It's like human decency and respect go out the window the second they don't feel like they have anything to gain from you. In *my* culture that is the lowest form of behavior a human can exhibit, and it causes me to rage because I can't imagine being so utterly devoid of altruism.
Fuck. It's just so sickening. It's fucking debased, and selfish and greedy and fuck. I can't even, this is one of those things that so irrational my mind can't accept it and I just go around and around on it.
Tl;dr you want to get throat punched? Because that's how you get throat punched. It's definitely getting this person doxxed to USCIS12 -
First rant. 3 years in my first job as a developer. It's been great. I've learned a ton. But the past 6 months have been awful. Our client is forcing us to remote into a cloud pc, which we then use to remote into Ubuntu. All development must be done this way. Everything is extremely slow. To the point that you can type faster than the screen can update. I want to jump out of the window. I'd basically have to move to get a new job, which Im not really into. Just bought a house a year ago, family is here, blah blah. Just hoping if I ride it out, client will wise up and let us use our own computer again.9
-
Devrant...
... give me the serenity to accept code that don't work
... The courage to fix code I can
... And the wisdom to find the typo before I throw my pc out of the window.
Amen.2 -
Google cripples ad and tracking blockers: In January, Chromium will switch to Manifest V3 which removes an essential API in favour of an inferior one. As usually, Google is being deceitful and touts security concerns as pretext.
That hits all Chromium based browser, such as my beloved Vivaldi. The team argues with their own browser internal blocker, but that's far worse than uBlock Origin. One of Vivaldi's core promises was privacy, and that will go out of the window. The team simply doesn't react to people pointing that out. They're fucked, and they know it.
So what now? Well, going back to Firefox because that will include the crippled new API for extension compatibility, but also keep the powerful old one specifically so that ad and tracking blockers will keep working. Google has just handed Mozilla a major unique selling point, and miraculously, Mozilla didn't fuck it up.26 -
nothing like being interviewed by non-devs for a dev role. the words experience and samples go right out the window and all they care about is do you have a degree because a piece of paper proves you can code and not your actual code. smh3
-
Note that the example tags for rants includes Xcode... There is a reason.
In 1984 Apple introduced Macintosh and we got a computer that could barely handle multiple windows on the screen. But by 1986 multiple windows all over the place.
In 1985 Microsoft introduced Window 1.0 Yes boys and girls, no "s" because it hand only one Window. 7 years later in 1992 Microsoft got their head out of their ass and produced "MDI" or Multiple Document Interface and woohoo, had multiple windows on the screen... big boy pants 8 years after Mac.
Today we have Xcode from Apple. The old Window 1.0 engineers are apparently alive and well as Xcode is a One Window Trick Pony and if you fight with it, it starts randomly jamming your separate Windows into tabs into one window, completely fucking up your spatial organization of your working source code.
It is like the bastards going into a blind man's house and re-arranging his furniture for fun.
Xcode - it's only free if your time is worth absolutely nothing.5 -
Today I had the pleasure to introduce to my Professor (who teaches Python) that you could cause a keyboard interrupt typing Ctrl-c. Her logic was that "Ctrl-c is for Copy" and the only way to end a infinite Loop in the shell is to, "X out the Window." She also clearly has never dealt with linux or terminals.13
-
Project manager sends mass email out for the 5th time about how things are needed ASAP. We're already overloaded. Sprint planning was thrown out the window a month ago. But the email is in comic sans.3
-
This morning there was this window cleaner again, that actually made me remember a rant from the old box - my previous account. Repost of that coming in an hour or so :3
Turns out that he came in the morning, and I completely forgot about it. The only appointment that I had today got canceled so I was like, eh fuck it. There's been this family event yesterday that made me so fucking tired... I'll just stay in bed for a little while longer.
Apparently that window cleaner ringed my bell multiple times, haven't heard him do it but anyway.. he and the cleaning lady had the genius idea to ask my landlord whether they can just barge in my home. Way to start the day, isn't it? I thought there were burglars.
In my bathrobe and visibly pissed off (I am NOT a morning person!), I let him do the window cleaning and waited for them to get the fuck out already. Then that cleaning lady, the fucking bitch that called my landlord to break into my home without MY prior permission!!! While the window cleaner was doing his work, she proceeds to ask me this.
Cleaning lady: "I had this technical issue earlier, and since you are good with phones I thought I'd ask you."
Me (thinking): oh, here it comes.. *rolling eyes*
M: "What's the issue?"
CL: "Well my stepson has an iPhone, which he broke and we brought it to a smartphone repair shop. They repaired it twice but an hour after receipt of the fixed phone, it breaks again."
M (t): You went wrong at iPhone, and you went wrong at visiting that incompetent mofo "teknishan" twice.
M: "Well I have no experience whatsoever with iPhones, but continue."
CL: "Well, he replaced the motherboard, and some pin at the bottom.."
M (t): The fucking motherboard of all things. The whole fucking motherboard?! The last thing that I'd look at, he just replaces like that?! Fucking piece of shit. That's even worse than Apple stores. And what's up with that goddamn pin? CAN'T YOU POSSIBLY BE A BIT MORE SPECIFIC?!
M: "Given only this information, I have no idea what's wrong with it."
CL: "But you are good with these things, aren't you?!"
M: "I disassemble my own broken phones, and dick around with their motherboards. That, while I'm fully aware that in the process I can break it beyond repair. That does not make me an expert on every phone out there."
CL: …
Well what did you even expect, fucking bitch. You barge into my home, don't even have the dignity to leave for me to be able to shower and dress myself, and then you go ask shit like that? Go suck my fucking cock, and shove that iPaperweight down your ass!! How about that?!9 -
The last several weeks I've been coding at 100%, most all day and well into the night. Today, I just can't.
Things I have done today:
*Watched Netflix.
*Walked around outside a bit.
*Let my 18 month old daughter type all over my code
* Closed mysterious dialogs and menus daughter opened up that I couldn't open if I tried
*Watched the Mets score 10 runs on the Phillies in the top of the 5th inning
*Browsed devRant
*Stared at stuff
* Cleaned up a few thousand emails out of my inbox
* Added filters to never see them again
* Noted impending deadlines on the calendar
* Stared at more stuff
In the meantime so many more ideas have come flooding in on how to proceed with these various features I'm working on. Can't even run from work.
So, no such thing as laziness, because apparent laziness is also productive. The exhaustion becomes doubly frustrating because there's just no way to physically keep up with the breakthroughs.
I'm still just staring out the window. It's raining now. Today is done.7 -
"The hardest part in programming is installing what you need."-the guy that almost threw it's PC out of the window because he spent 2 hours installing the wrong version of opencv3
-
I worked with a sales guy once who would randomly come into my office and look out the window. Our entire office was Windows. There was a rumor that he was checking to see if his car was repossessed yet. As he had been caught selling knives over the phone in his lunch break half a dozen times.
When he came into my office he did not say a word or make eye contact. Just walk in. Look out the window. And walk out. Man that guy was weird.3 -
Windows 10 had one groundbreaking UI innovation, but no one adopted it and even Windows 11 discareded this revolutionary idea:
BUTTONS NEXT TO EACH OTHER AND AT THE EDGE OF A BOX DON"T NEED AN ADDITIONAL MARGIN
Windows 10 was the first and last OS where I never accidentally clicked right next to the X on a window, in a passive area that had no other purpose so it might as well have belonged to that motherfucking button.
I passionately hate this trend, adopted nowadays by every OS, that everything needs to be rounded, separated from the things around it, and "allowed to breathe". They don't breathe. They're not alive. They're fucking UI elements and the space between them is unused, lost space.
The only interaction a button has with its surroundings is that it pushes other content away to make room for itself and responds to the cursor. It doesn't wiggle, it doesn't grow and shrink, and it ESPECIALLY doesn't fucking breathe. Please, just let me click the motherfucking button.
Relatedly, do you know of a good, preferably bluish dark GTK theme that provides window decorations that stretch the full height of the titlebar and are laid out next to each other at the very end of the bar without gaps?8 -
So, today's comedy job story (and how depressive things become), and it's only 9:30.
Stressed PM assaults me at 8 to tell me what I have to do, standing next to me and dictacting stuff she wants done. Hate that.
As I went to a colleague to help her out with these fucking presentations (she "couldn't open them"), as I just arrived to her office my phone rings.
It's my PM. I'm 20m away, she calls me. Ok.
Me: "Yes?"
PM: "Hey Phlisg, erm, we are stuck in a conference room, can you come and open the door?"
Me: "Erm, the door has no handle, can't help"
PM: "Can you call the "housekeeper"?"
Me: "Sure" (why the hell doesn't she have his number...)
I go downstairs, go towards the conference room, and before the door there is the reception office. I ask the colleagues in there if the "housekeeper" is here, but they instead produced the handle from their drawers, and went to the door to open it.
At the same time, a person locked inside the conference room went through the window to go round and try to open the door.
Door successfully opened by colleague with handle.
I mean...
WHAT
THE
FUCK!
You have a problem? One reflex: call Phlisg. She might call me at 2 am in the morning because she cannot sleep or something.
Pissed!!13 -
Continued from previous post.
As the chill wind blows outside, the man picks up his laptop and phone. Slowly walks towards his bed and lifts an old hoodie. With easy he slides it on him, pulls the hood over his head. He turns around facing the window. On the back of his old hoodie, there is a design which looks faded and discolored. Below it some words which too are faded. He walks towards the window and glances on the street. It's still empty. All he can hear is the wind.
"Perfect", he says to himself and walks out his room.
As he is about to exit the building, he sees an Apache chopper passing above. It zooms above the street. A wild guess he makes, probably it's heading where he is heading.
His phone vibrates with a message.
"It's ready".6 -
Today was just marvelous. Locked up my car with keys inside and with engine on.
I was driving back home from work. I drove to a parking near home, which is really long, narrow and impossible to turn around. So I decided to get out of a car, for like, 30 secs and go check, if there were any unoccupied parking places. Parking brake; I stepped out of the car and closed the door. Click.
Brilliant.
I knew, that I needed to change contacts in the driver door, that sometimes were triggering central car lock, but I didn't expecting such outcome.
So, I am outside.
Engine is on.
Parking brake.
My backpack and phone were inside.
Luckily, one neighbor wanted to drive somewhere, so I explained, why he can't donit, why my car is here and asked to watch my car for 5 mins while I will run home.
So I ran home in home to find a second pair of keys.
After some time, LUCKILY, I found them, went back and unlocked my car...
Moral: don't delay things.. Small fixes to prolong life of some object will eventually fail in very, very uncomfortable manner.
I'm glad I found spare keys and there were no need to break my own car window... And I DO care about my car and do lot of things by myself.1 -
i know we're all sick and tired of the covid talk, but...
I'm so, so sedentary right now, more so than two years ago, and that's a feat.
this past week i had to walk a little and do some stuff, and today i woke up a little earlier and spent my afternoon in the sun. and it feels so good, to just... do nothing, sunbathe, pet my cat, kiss my boyfriend.
i never realize how much this shit wears me down until i catch a break. it's not just the pandemic though, it's this career, this lifestyle. sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours straight, no window in sight... that's death, no matter how much of an introverted nerd i may be.
if someone wants advice, I'll tell you to go out, get some fresh air, do nothing at all. we don't need to do something at every minute of the day, that's not resting. find a park, a beach, some piece of nature and just breathe it in, it's worth it.4 -
The most unusual place I have coded:
At office
Last Friday at 9:05 PM.
No one was there except me and a strange tapping sound kept coming out of no where.
Outside the window, I could see two people fighting. -
Not sure if thats just me, but I absolutely can not stand watching people work on a computer slowly. Like: Watching people copy a text into a different window be like:
Select text with the mouse...
Move mouse down for 20 seconds until everything is selected ..
Right click
Copy
Click on Taskbar to open different program.
Right click in program
Click paste....
I .... just ... can't man.
Its: Ctrl+a, ctrl+c, alt+tab, ctrl+v
(And that is just one example, there are worse ones)
Maybe that just me, but I am so used to using my computer fast, and I optimized the shit out of my workflow.12 -
!dev
I come from a small shitty valley where all that people want to achieve is getting approved for loans to buy more cows and shit.. My only friend comes from there as well but he’s different, more like me.. build a life, get out and pursuit something better and bigger..
We grew up smoking everything we could and drinking everything we got because what else are we gonna do, put shit on fire? Been there, done that.. it sucks growing up on the poop hole of the world.
We both left that shithole and started careers but he’s throwing it all out the window.. he’s getting caught with weed, DUI and shit. just a few years ago he got off of more serious drugs.. He built a career and shit for about 10 years but right now he’s just throwing it all away because drugs are in his comfort zone. But he has to go give Pias samples for a while now and if he doesn’t stop he is not getting his license back and the unemployment insurance won’t even pay him because (although he lost the job because of Covid) they said it’s because he smokes weed.
Without the license goes his career as he’s a service electrician.
So fucking hurtful to see, man.
And so hard to accept that he won’t listen and than I’m not his dad who can tell him what to do..
90% of the kids I grew up with who managed to leave that shit hole ended up as homeless junkies.. I guess I’m happy to have the mindset to not end up like them.. and that’s really all it is, the mindset is the only difference (which is complex in itself of course like parenting and stuff)5 -
Update:
The wasp is still alive.
I walked in today to find the damn buzzy mother-earth-fucker on the window. It doesn't have much energy now, and I didn't let it out because mofo got the chance a million times over to just leave me the fuck alone. So I just let it be. no idea where in the lab it is hidden now, and the robots will watch him all night, every night.
And you know what, I'm not gonna open the damn window for it ever again.
(Sat in my hoodie, wrapped, the whole day and was paranoid about it flying and sitting on me, but the war is on. He won't get out of this lab alive. )16 -
I can't even deal with this. We just deployed a new update to our system, and everything was going smoothly. And then, out of nowhere, we started getting a bunch of error messages and user complaints.
Why do these things always happen? We spent hours trying to figure out the source of the problem, and it turns out it was because we didn't do enough testing before the deployment. Are you kidding me?
I know that testing can be time-consuming, but seriously, this is ridiculous. It's frustrating when something like this happens, especially when we're under a tight deadline. And to make matters worse, we had to roll back the deployment and start all over again. I just want to throw my computer out the window.
Uuuugghhh!2 -
Proof that there is no drug testing at Apple:
- Xcode 10 moved code snippets in a transient spotlight-style window.
The only way you can show snippets is if you have your editor window in "browser mode" vs "document mode" and then the dumbass button with { } on it shows.
If you go into the help menu in the menubar where you can search the other menus, typing in "Snippet" shows only "Create Code Snippet" under "Editor" menu.
So to make it painfully clear, they hide the snippets under a button on a window in a particular window mode. Then, because they have now fucked up the use of Snippets, the "Create" capability becomes a "how do we do that?". This did not make them reconsider their approach... oh nooo... instead they sloppily stuff it in the regular menus all by itself... and do not put a Show Snippets near it. And conversely they don't put a "+" or "-" button in the snippets window.
So here is what happened... someone said "having the snippets in the code editor window is a pain" and someone half-listening heard "windowpane" and pulled out their stash of LSD... everyone took a hit ... and now we have a fucked up hidden button and an orphaned menu command.
I'm going to have to change my username to "XcodeDevTeamAreMorons"3 -
Currently trying to convert a Python (2.7) framework into its C++. Surprise, surprise, the C++ APIs are also all deprecated
"Here's a guide to creating your project using our non-deprecated framework, except it will still call our deprecated methods under the hood"
Additionally, I had to make this framework work with OpenCV, which was complaining about my C++ framework being deprecated and not being able to link to missing modules (which were already installed).
All of this has eaten 4 hours of my life, I could as well throw the laptop out of the window
"Try reinstalling the missing modules separately"
*installation takes less than 1 minute*
*runs build again, everything work*
I'm done for today *flies away in desperation* -
Sort of a meeting, sort of an informal interview, I've dialled in from the home office and my audio setup includes a standalone mic and some noise cancelling headphones. It's going really really well when all of a sudden I see something in the preview window of my webcam feed.
Behind me, looking very concerned and confused is my 73 year old Nanna who'd decided to pop in and see me as she was passing by.
It's common for me to keep the front door locked, but my Nanna has an emergency key and knows I don't always hear a knock at the door, so let herself in.
So she's now in the house, calling out to me and she can hear me talking, so follows the sound of my voice thinking maybe I'm on the phone. Walks right into the office, where the door is behind me, eventually puts two and two together to work out that I can't hear her and finally sees herself on my monitor. She panics and goes to hide in the corner of my office, almost underneath my workbench because she's old and doesn't know where she would or wouldn't be visible from.
The rest of the meeting went really well, but overran by at least half an hour. Meanwhile I can see my poor Nanna hiding away in my peripheral vision.3 -
Today was "one of those days".
So, the state machines were keep on failing. I said fuck it and wrote a simpler loop thing.
Even that failed.
And it took me hours to figure out what was wrong. But I did. Because THERE WAS VIRTUALLY NO FUCKING DOCCO ON THIS SHIT, ANYWHERE ON THE FUCKING ENTIRETY OF THE INTERNET. Hell, I even translated a few pages from Mandarin. Which is ridiculous since I'm working with standard robotic shit. Like, wtf even?
Anywho, I also had a heart attack because the port was not responding. I ran across the building to find the guy who fortunately had another port controller. That didn't work either. Then by the God-given cure of "Turning it off and on again " (it, in this case, being the computers) it worked!
Then I broke the window blinds. It's not coming down anymore.
Like, yeah, thanks, I'll take a weekend and half.7 -
Today was a manic-depressive kind of day. Spent the morning helping some developers with getting their code to run a stored procedure to drop old partitions, but it wasn't working on their end. It was a fairly simple proc. But working with partitions is a little like working with an array. I figured out that they were passing the wrong timestamp, and needed to add +1 to delete the right partition. Got that sorted out, and things were good. Lunch time.
After lunch I did some busy work, and then the PO comes up at about 2PM and says he's assigned some requests to me. The first was just attaching some scripts. Easy. The second, the user wants a couple of schemas exported ... at 6PM. I've been in the office since 6:45AM.
While I'm setting up some commands to run for the data export, a BA walks up and asks if I'm filling in for another DBA who is out for a few weeks. Yep. There's a change request that hasn't been assigned, and he normally does the work. I ask when it's due. Well, the pre-implementation was supposed to be done in the morning, but it wasn't, and we're in the implementation window ... half way through. I bring up the change task, and look at. Create new schema and users. That's all it says. The BA laughs. I tell I need more to go on. 10 minutes later he sends an email with the information. There's only two hours left in the window, and I can only use half of it, because the production guys have to their stuff, and we're in their window. Now I'm irritated, because I'm new to Oracle, and it's an unforgiving mistress. Fortunately, another DBA says he'll do it, so that we can get it done in time. But can't work it either, because Dev DBAs don't have access to QA, and the process required access for this task. Gets shelved until the access issue is resolved. It's now after 4:15PM. I'm going to in traffic with that 6PM deadline.
I manage to get home and to the computer by 5:45PM. Log in. Start VPN. Box pops on screen. Java needs to update. I chose skip update. Box pops up again. It won't let me log in until Java is current. Passed.
I finally get logged in, and it's 6:10PM. I'm late getting the job started. I pull up Putty and log into the first box, and paste my pre-prepared command in the command line and hit error. Command not found. I'm tired, so it's a moment to sink in. I don't have time for this.
I log into DBArtisan and pull up the first data base, use the wizard to set the job, and off it goes. Yay. Bring up the second database, and have enter the connect info. Host not found. Wut? Examine host name. Yep, it's correct. Try a different method. Host not found. Go back to Putty. Log in. Past string. Launch. Command not found. Now my brain is quitting on me. Why now? It's after 6:30PM. Fiddle with some settings, reset $Oracle home. Try again. Yay. It works. I'm done. It's after 7PM.
There is nothing like technology to snatch the euphoria of a success away from you. It's a love-hate thing, but I wouldn't trade it for anything else. I'm done. Good night.3 -
Got a job as a database manager, they wanted me to update their sql server and some of their .net apps. Turns out their sql server had no databases and all their data was stored in an ms access 2003 applications that was using windows for workgroups security!!! It also had no interface, hundreds of tables and queries and there were multiple access db it was connected to. To make things worse the person who built all this stuff used acronyms for everything he did, table names, variables, queries and even bloody window folders!!! It was hard as hell to figure out what anything ment. Oh and the .net apps were asp sites that heavily used dll for storing his code and no one knows where the original source code for them are. Did I also mention there were no comments for any of the code, no database dictionary, no notes or anything.
So apparently I'll be rebuilding everything from scratch and transferring over the data to sql server. AND NO MORE F**KING ACRONYMS!!!!!!!2 -
Stories from a Startup #1
CEO walks into co-worker's office, staring longingly out of the window at the lake below.
After a brief moment of silence, the CEO speaks...
"I wonder if that swan ever thinks... about me?"1 -
Asshole-Driven development (ADD) – Any team where the biggest jerk makes all the big decisions is asshole driven development. All wisdom, logic or process goes out the window when Mr. Asshole is in the room, doing whatever idiotic, selfish thing he thinks is best. There may rules and processes, but Mr. A breaks them and people follow anyway.
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I am a fucking software developer and not an IT guy, I write code and if the fucking printer is not connecting, throw it out of the window, that's way better than calling me for help, because one day, I'll do that, and you'll regret...3
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15 hour days, build is broken, laptop crashed and I ragequit by nearly throwing it out the Window.
Time to go Home. -
So I flew to California Saturday to see my daughter. It was fun, and I was glad to see her.
Now, when I bought my tickets, I got a flight that landed at 11:30pm, allowing me to sleep on the plane a bit, drive home, sleep more, and then wake up at 6am for work.
Well, that went out the window. Fuck you Southwest, Fuck you.
(I'm currently on layover in Phoenix) -
Create a new project in Xcode Version 10.1 (10B61) - Single View iOS app.
Drag a button on to the screen. It shows in InterfaceBuilder
Launch app in simulator. Button shows, then disappears. Noob says WTF?!
Poor noob has to ask me why this is happening and I explain that Apple's Single View project is a single splash screen project. The button they placed on what they thought was the single "window" is really a splash screen named "LaunchScreen".
Apple Xcode team (aka fucktards) provide yet another shitty out of the box experience...
It is so hard to be positive when teaching others how to use Xcode. Thanks for DevRant for letting me vent.1 -
Am I the only person who gets by just fine without creating algorithm schemes, big indepth projects plans and whatnot?
I'm just fine with a to-do list, ex:
- add self-adjusting window paddings so shit doesn't start flying out16 -
!multirant
1. MonoDevelop
Installed Unity for a game I'm working on. Realized I didn't reinstall VS when my SSD got corrupted. Didn't install VS plugin w/ Unity.
So now I have MonoDevelop. It's not a bad editor, but PLEASE. IF YOU ARE GOING TO HIGHLIGHT A FUNCTION WITH RED BECAUSE IT DOESNT EXIST IN THE CLASS, THEN TELL ME, WHAT THE FUCK EXISTS IN THE CLASS!
2. UnityJS
Unity's JS implementation is terrible.
First, let's throw basic syntax shit out on the window. string.toUpperCase? Nah, let's make it string.ToUpperCase to annoy the shit out of devs.
AND SOME OF THE STANDARD FUNCTIONS ARENT EVEN FUCKING WORKING!
Need to use parseInt(string, 2)? WELL GO FUCK YOURSELF, BECAUSE WE DIDNT IMPLEMENT THAT SHIT.
...or use C# I guess...
FUCK UNITY.
🖕🖕🖕15 -
I love open source and all that fun stuff but I am very unimpressed by having to use GNU/Linux based OS after the last fuck up... the lack of games, stuff that actually works, the almost constant need to compile something and the need to have DDG open at all times because something broke. I mean why the fuck do I need to install libcurl3:i386(for 32 bit programs and games) if there is already libcurl4 and why the actual fuck does it conflict?!... Why the fuck do I need to glue together and compile drivers for my printer?! And they only have "beta support" so like half of the functions that the printer would normally have... Why the fuck don't any games work? Witcher 2? Nope, you click launch and the launcher just closes itself. osu!lazor? Nope, the game will run but only as a process in the background, no window will open no matter what I do. StarCraft: Brood War? Nope, Wine hates the battle.net client and running it in a VM is a really bad idea, the game flickers like crazy... Any other games? Pretty much out of luck... I would really like to play KCD but I doubt it would be playable...rant wine compile all the things glue together your own printer driver open source stuff breaks ubuntu os duckduckgo vm gnu/linux games24
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Me: Runs app
*Crash with error*
Me: Changes one thing, then runs again
*Crash with different error in another part of code*
Me: Fixes that error and runs again
*A FATAL ERROR HAS BEEN DETECTED BY THE JAVA RUNTIME ENVIRONMENT*
Me: Runs app again, "Maybe it was just a hiccup."
*A FATAL ERROR HAS BEEN DETECTED BY THE JAVA RUNTIME ENVIRONMENT*
Me: Chucks laptop out window. Goes to gaming PC to play Dark Souls 3, because it's less angering than this.7 -
Things to do while you encounter a bug and haven't resolved in some hours:
- Leave it and get clean air so your brain relaxes.
What i do:
- Stay there trying to figure out why the fuck this shit doesn't work and considering falling from the window a very good option1 -
Some old tech: exists and functions just fine for 20+ years.
Some tech bro: Yeah we gotta throw this out the window and re-invent the freaking wheel.13 -
short one.
So my CS course is full of people who can't write a fucking for loop (I shit you not) after more than half a year.
And then there's those that don't know what a return type is.
So I asked them once, after they stated that the course sucks, why they even chose it in the first place.
Freely translated it would be:
"I dunno, I thought we'd be doing cool hacker stuff in here..."
At that point I just wanted to jump out of the window.5 -
So I installed Avast because I was downloading some torrents.
After months I suddenly hear a really loud "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden". I nearly got a heart attack. I thought I've got a fucking maleware shitty fuck thing, but I had no idea how I could find out where the fuck it was coming from. So I ignored it.
Then, weeks later again: "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden", while I was browsing the web.
I thought it was coming from a website so I looked through every tab and window. But nothing.
So I googled the exact sentence it said, and voila:
The first result was from the avast support site.
I opened avast and looked into the settings. There! A checkbox to turn it off! These fucking cock suckers enabled it by default!
It was the first time I enjoyed clicking a fucking checkbox. FUCK YOU AVAST!!!
Why is AntiVirus Software so shitty these days... I'll probably just switch to Windows Defender.9 -
TL;DR: Google asked me to PROVIDE a phone number to verify connection from a new device, on the said device.
Yesterdayto log into my work Google account from my personal laptop to check emails, calendars update and so on. I opened up a private navigation window, went to Google sign-in page, entered my credentials, all is well.
Google then decided to "verify it's me" and prompted me to PROVIDE a phone number (work account without work phone means no phone number set up) so that they can send a verification code to the number I just provided to make sure the connection is legit.
Didn't want to do that, clicked "use another method" and got asked to fill the last password I remember, which would be my current password thanks to my trusty password manager. After submitting, I'm prompted with an error saying I have to contact my admin to reset my password because they can't log me in with my CURRENT password.
I ain't gonna do that, so went back to login page, provided my phone number, got the code, filled in the code, next thing I know I'm browsing through my emails.
What the duck? Could have been anybody giving any phone number. So much for extra security.
Also don't care that they have my phone number, the issue is more about the way used to obtain it: locking me out of my account and having no other way of logging in.6 -
Dev of 15 years here. All my career historically started and evolved/revolved around Microsoft in one way or the other, so was my exposure to only DOS and the Windows as a child and growing up.
Like already discussed in multiple rants here, I was one of those naturally Windows -favoring ppl through all my life. That is not to say I didn't try Linux here and there, for hosting of personal projects, as one usually does. But it never quite stuck with me as a personal daily driver, mainly because all I ever needed for personal use was a browser, discord, and Steam/GOG/Epic Games store for gaming (work-wise I always had and still have company provided laptops which are OF COURSE Windows powered)
Anyway, maybe you can see where I'm going with this... I recently gave Nobara Linux a go (Glorious Eggroll's Fedora flavor, with some custom kernel patches) and I have to say, not thinking of going back to Windows at all.
Just a few thoughts on comparing two sets of experiences with Win vs Nobara
- Win definitely feels more sluggish
- Nobara's default desktop env was Gnome 42 with some extensions pre-enabled. I dove right into hacking/customizing it to my tastes and it looked glorious. Never would have achieved this customization with Win
- I was using RDP to remote into my work laptop from my personal desktop setup with Windows and I still successfully do so with Remmina now in Linux
- A week ago I dove deeper and installed Awesome window manager as a UI and mh boy does this feel intimidating at first. But then the allure of having nice window managing experience was too strong, and 15 years of coding do help with just seeing a new language and kinda feeling at home instantly (Lua language for AwesomeWM customization/themes). Fast forward a week and now I'm sitting happily with 3 monitor setup, one of them vertical, all properly auto aligned with arandr on startup, variety+wal for wallpaper auto circling and applying a theme out of main wallpaper colors every so often (+wrote a script to put those main colors into my RGB peripherals via OpenRGB)
- Gaming. I still game, Steam Deck from steam gave me all the confidence to set up Linux gaming that I needed. I think I am now properly versed in all things Wine/Proton/Lutris/Bottles/Heroic Games Launcher, you name it. Recently finished Cyberpunk 2077.
ANYWAY, thank you for coming to my Linux appreciation TED talk. It's amazing. -
Some fegit: "test you"
*fegit sends outbound Facebook link to some Paki website*
(why not a direct link you moron?)
Fegit: "go."
Me (thinking): *what the fuck does this idiot want from me*
Me: "What makes you think that we want to prove ourselves to you by us doing your dirty work? We are not your personal army, so please fuck right off."
Fegit: "look out ya window"
Ehm yeah sure.. as if there's anything there. You'll need more than that to threaten me.
Me: "Anything to see there?"
Fegit: …
Fucking piece of shit. Look out your window you say. Wanna give it a try? To someone who masters the art of wrangling the angry pixies? I don't need a gun to kill people, you know ^^
Oh well. At least it wasn't a "plz huk Phasebuk" question I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
I have been burnt out for over a year and a half now combined with mental health issues.
I was working an underpaying job, doing senior-dev work for a less than junior-dev pay, with an incompetent understaffed team. The work was so mundane and most of the clients were stupid. I hated work, my colleagues, and most of all I hated programming.
I finally quit the job and quit programming as well. I couldn't touch or see a terminal window without panicking. I've been spending my time binge watching series and movies.
Recently though, I've started picking up coding again. I've been blogging and doing some changes to my blog beside other light stuff.
This is the story of my first burnout and it's taken its toll on me. I hope it's the last one but who knows.3 -
Does anyone else get a serious internal urge to throw their computer out the window while waiting for Android emulators to load?4
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I saw that a co-worker had left their office email open on their machine, so I typed out a huge hate mail of the upper management and then announced resignation for the poor work culture that the company provided. Then I edited the email to be a bit more nice. I added some praise about the company - about having the opportunity to work in the company and for the amazing colleagues (and mentioned my own name) in the first paragraph. To close the email, I wrote :
"PS : This is what happens if you leave your machine open for the office to do as they please"
I first sent out a copy to myself (as proof) with the cover :
" Hey, check this out, I'm sending this out to everyone@company.com in a while. I want to let you know that none of this is directed at you. You've been an amazing colleague and mentor. You've been my inspiration from the start; from the time I joined the team. I'm honoured that I got to work with you. I hope we can remain friends as we are now, meet up once in a while outside work and discuss life. "
And then I put the actual email up in the compose window with the to field addressed to everyone@company.com. I didn't hit send.
Funnily, enough, this person never found out that it was me who actually typed out the whole email for another 1.5 months. They probably looked into their Sent folder later on when they saw the email that I sent to myself. They replied to it saying :
"Thank you for not sending out that email that day. I've been very very extra careful (I didn't understand the "very, very, extra" part) since that day"
I replied that it was only to prove a point and that I thought the point was well conveyed.
I had a good laugh that day. Since then, every time we crossed paths, we had that look in our eyes that met and only the 2 of us understood.1 -
XCODE WINDOW COMPLETELY BLACKED OUT. RESTART COMPUTER. SPINNING WHEEL OF DEATH. CANNOT OPEN PROJECT. RESTART XCODE. STACKOVERFLOW. DELETE CACHES. RESTART COMPUTER. REPLACE PROJECT FILES. PROJECT BROKEN. CRIY FOR HOURS. PUSH FILES TO GITHUB. PULL TO NEW FOLDER. SUDDENLY WORKS. XCODE SUCK1
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Writing a truly crossplatform terminal library is the biggest pain in the ass.
And you thought windows was bad. They have a proper API with droves of features, freely allocatable screenbuffers, scrolling on both axes, etc.
Fucking xterm vtxxx compatible piles of shit are the problem.
Controlling kinda works eventhough the feature set is pretty bad. The really fucked up thing is reading values back. They literally get put into the input buffer. So you have to read all the actual user input before that and then somehow parse out the returned control sequence. Of course the user input has to be consumed so I have to buffer it myself. Even better is when you get a response with non printable characters which the fucking terminal will interpret as another control sequence. So when you set a window title to a ansi control sequence it would get executed when queried. Fuck this shit but I'm not giving up. I will tame this ugly, bodged together dragon7 -
<error>
*works on fixing error for 1.5 hours*
compile, run.
<new error>
*Squints eyes*
*"fixes" in 30 mins*
compile, run...
success?
<first error again>
now i am contemplating whether what should be thrown out the window is the pc or myself...1 -
At some point, someone on the visual studio team thought: what people need is a clicky-draggy gui for editing yaml files for github actions.
And instead of throwing him unceremoniously out of the window, the rest of the team agreed, and said: yes, that's a great idea, it will be almost as useful as that clicky-draggy gui for editing sql commands.3 -
So I recently wacthed Prison Break
Right in the beginning, Michael takes the hdd out of his computer and throws it out the window
Me: Yea he should've dismantled that drive and thrown the pieces away in different places
Then later on someone else is trying to figure his plan and finds the drive and recovers data. Yea.. what did I say?6 -
that feeling when you start looking at code after dinner, correct a bug or two, start implementing new features, tweak the code a little bit, you are really focus in your coding... then look out the window and realize the sun is about to come up. it's great 🤓
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2 colleagues just had a meeting with the CEO and the meeting just ended:
Colleague 1: "I'm gonna jump out of the window"
Colleague 2: "Make sure to land on your head"
Must have been a very productive meeting.3 -
JetBrain's IDE and its possibility to rollback my "sudo rm *" command in the wrong folder just in 3 clicks is one of the few reasons why I didn't throw myself out of a window yet.2
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Someone asked "What's a sad reality for devs?"
Let me add one to that cuz I'm too lazy to find the actual thread.
A sad reality of devs is to be dependent on the management's mercy for them to be in the team/company. Your years of work can be thrown out the window just like that when management feels like it and there is almost nothing devs can do about it.
This sprung to mind cuz I experienced that today. My client cut my dev team in half to "make up for the recent losses the company faced". Obviously my team wasn't responsible for it.
This shit sucks man.1 -
My team's been moved to a new floor. We're now sat by sales and marketing andI'm losing my fucking mind.
There's one lady who starts every call with the most sing-song version of 'Hi, {}'.format(Name) where she draws out 'Hi' so it's about 3 syllables long. If I have to hear it one more time I'm going to rip the phone out of her hand and throw it out the window.
I have headphones, but it's as if she waits for the second I take them off to say her catchphrase.7 -
I am a mechanical engineer first and my companies go to sysadmin second. So software developing isnt really my main field of expertise buuttt:
WHY IS SLOOPY SOFTWARE WRITING A VIABLE EXCUSE?
Story:
Yesterday i started to migrate some stuff from our old Win 2008 Server to the new 2016. Turns out there are some MS SQL Express Servers running. Quick check for what they are turns out that they are activly used. So far so good. For other reasons we have a new MSSQL 2017 Core Licence. So i thought, hey it would be nice to just move those 2012, 2008 and 2014 Express Servers to a real one that can use the entire machines capabilities.
After some try & error with exporting one of the softwares (where i had to elevate one the user rights to sysadmin for reasons) the entire system stopped working. I didnt deleted anything or changed anything! Well, i elevated user rights. After 2 hours of support call it turns out that the software stopped working cause i gave the database user sysadmin rights. I dont know enough about MSSQL to judge wether that is logical or not, but it sounds super illogical and i suspect sloopy software writing on the manufacturers part. One way or another, the excuse from the telephone support was "yeah, our software is a very fragile child"
Okay.
After i told all that my coworkers two of them were also "yeah, that is just how the [company] software is, you have to be careful with it"
Apparently it broke in the past for other minor stuff.
As an engineer i cannot build bridges that collapse when you use the left and the right lane at the same time. For an architect it isnt okay to build an house where the front door explodes when you open a window. It is not okay for a power tool to go out in a fireball when you accidently drill plastic with it. But for some weird reasons its socially acceptable for programs to be sloopy, buggy and only working under specific conditions. Since when is it okay for a car only to work when you know specific steps to make it run? Like, throwing your spare key in the gas tank, the kick the left wheel exactly three times and finally tapping the steering wheel 5 times left, 4 times right. What? That would be ridiculous? But that is exactly how that software works. You have to follow a specific step guide to make it work, EVERY TIME.
I. JUST. DONT. GET. IT3 -
MacBook/OSX
Have used all kinds of OSes and computers. Nothing sucked the productivity out of me as much a company provided MacBook. Some issues were related to the company setup (vpn issues after sleep, jamf botched app installs). But most of the day to day work was just due to crappy key handling. Lots of shortcuts that work everywhere don't (think all the alt combos in terminal). Common things require combos and using the actual keys (like home and end) on an external keyboard have undefined behaviour. Out of the box it does not even have decent window management, this means that a third party tool has to provide the shortcuts and they clash with a few programs.
Thank god I can use Linux now to develop for Linux.6 -
Windows restrict us from going out of the box (house), and allow us to see the world only through the window, sitting in.4
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I am currently looking for a DAW (Digital Audio Workstation), because my music projects are starting to get a little too complex for Audacity.
So I started looking for a good, easy-to-learn, ideally free program, and quickly learned that Avid now has a free version of Pro Tools called First.
So I go to their site and fill out the registration form to get the download. In addition to creating an account with Avid, you also need to create one with iLok, which apparently has something to do with how they manage their licenses. Kinda overkill for a free program, but okay...
I download the program (about 3gigs...), install it and try to start it. It gives me an error message about missing some service. Okay? I'm confused because I notice that an 'Application Manager' service has appeared in my tray, and when I open that I can log into my new account just fine. But it still doesn't work.
There's a link in the error message to the iLok website, and it looks like ai need to dowload and install another component. Why didn't that get installed with the program if it's required?
Hmm...
So I go to the iLok site, download it and install it. Pro Tools First still won't start. I realize that the PTF installer asked me to reboot, which I didn't do because: a) I always have a lot of windows open, and b) How often is a reboot ACTUALLY required? Why would you need to reboot?
So I (begrudgingly) reboot, and now the program seems to start initializing... but then it throws an error message about some plugin that it can't load because it doesn't work for the 64 bit version. Then... why are you even looking for it?
And then it says something like: 'I can't handle that, I'm just gonna shut down'.
What?
I try starting it again. Same error appears, but then it gets past it this time... Only to throw another error message about something else it can't load, and therefore it must shut down.
Deep breath.
Third time is the charm, the program actually made it to the project create/load screen! Huzzah!
So I look around a bit, but don't do much. It doesn't seem too intuitive to me, so I start watching some tutorials on YouTube from Avid themselves. It's a little late by now, so I don't get my hands dirty that day.
Next time I want to try out the program I start it up, still get error messages, but it does seem to initialize okay. But then the 'Create project' button doesn't react when I press it.
It turns out that the program takes a looong time to log in to the avid account, even though the manager service is running and logged in...
When it finally logs on I create a new blank project, but it doesn't ask me where to save it to. I see there is a counter saying 1/3 and looking around I find some info about 'cloud based projects'.
It would seem that this program only supports saving projects to the cloud, and you get only 3 projects total. Three. THREE?
Ahem...
I add an instrument track to my new project and select the one and only plugin, which is a synth. I don't see the plugin window, like in the tutorials I watched. I fiddle around with the windows, but I only manage to get the layout fucked up. There's a handy 'Window' menu, but none of the options resets the view. The main window is now sporting a WINDOWS FUCKING 7 BORDER! And partially blocking the view of the top menu.
Blaaargh!
Frustrated, I shut the program down and restart it. I now select one of the project templates (after waiting for it to LOG IN AGAIN!) in the hope that I might have a bit more luck with that starting point.
But when the template has loaded, out of nowhere, the program goes from maximized to windowed mode! And the fucking Win7 border is back again, still messing with the main menu!
FFS!
I get the sucker maximized again and select one of the synth tracks, and Lo and Behold! The synth plugin window actually shows up! But of course there is no sound produced when I play, neither with the keyboard or my midi keyboard.
Oh no, that would have been too easy.
I see some the meters moving when I play, but no sound is produced. I check the options menu, but find out nothing useful except for the fact that the program only support 48kHz sample rate. That's pretty disappointing when you have a 192kHz/24bit soundcard.
I'm done. This piece of shit software is NOT for me. It's bloated, complicated to sign up for and install, extremely limited and buggy as hell!
The final insult is that it takes 5 minutes to uninstall because there is no uninstall option in the so-called 'Application Manager' (of course fucking not!), and doing it through Programs & Features there are 5 (FIVE!!) different apps and services to uninstall, one by one.
0/10, would not recommend.11 -
Bug fixed! Commit, close ticket.
Ticket reopens. Dang.. let me test it. Still fixed, wtf? Send message to QA guy that opened it again.
"Read my comment." Comment has some entirely different yet slightly related bug.
Leap out window.1 -
!coding
I used to be a sysadmin, which meant I was in charge of quarterly server patching. My team managed about 2500 servers, running various flavors of linux and legacy unix. The vast majority(95% or more) ran Linux(SLES). Our maintenance window was always in the overnight-- 10pm to 6am --so the stroke of 10pm would be a massive cascade of patching commands sent to hundreds of servers.
Before I was brought into the process, it made use of the automation product we were tasked by mgmt to use: Bigfix. It's a real piece of shit. Though we had 2500 or so servers, this environment was dominated by windows. All our vcenter servers ran it, and more importantly, our bigfix nodes were all windows machines. That meant that while we're trying to patch, the bigfix servers would get patched by the windows team. This would cause lots of failed and timed out patching, because the windows admins never quite understood that taking down the automation infrastructure would cause problems.
As such, I got tired of depending on a bunch of button-pushing checkbox-clickers who didn't know shit about shit, so I started writing an ssh-wrapped patching system. By the time I left for my current job, patching had been reduced to a single command to initiate each group's patching and reboots, and an easy check to see when servers come back up. So usually, the way it worked out was that I would send patching orders to 750 machines or so, and within about 5 minutes, they would all be done patching, and within another 20 minutes all the ones that required rebooting but about 5 would be done rebooting.
The "all-nighter" which happened every time was waiting for oracle servers to run timed fscks against a dozen or so large filesystems per server, because they were all on ext3/4, which eats complete shit. Then, several hours later, as they finished, I would have to call the DBAs to tell them to validate their shitty servers.3 -
I used to be in an infrastructure maintenance team, and I worked with an old guy. We had a jump box we all used. This guy would work weekend maintenance windows and still be trying to get changes done at 7am, three hours after the end of the window. He was glacially slow. I remember watching him login to a prod weblogic server. He would open the Windows start menu, move his fucking mouse through two or three submenus, and finally click putty. Then, he would type out the FQDN of the jump server, and move his mouse to the connect/ok button. Then it would prompt him for his username and password, both of which took him about 90 seconds to single-finger type. Then, once loved into the jump box, he would then type ssh user@server.fqdn, rather than copying and pasting the server name.
It took him fully five minutes to get logged into the weblogic server. I could not take it. It would have taken me about ten seconds. -
If I ever have to write a RESTful API form scratch again I'm gonna throw myself out of the window.7
-
RANT
We use Exact for our time sheets/hour tracking. How it's supposed to work:
-Manager plans my hours in Exact.
- I work those hours on the given projects
== All fine till here ==
But then ... there is a button (don't know the correct translation) "realise" which books the planned hours for me. So I don't have to do it manually.
This simply didn't work!! No one seem to know why not... Not even the guys at Exact.
Since it's web based I opened the developers window and looked for the call behind the button. You would think it would be at least an Ajax call thingy (I'm not completely into JS)
Turns out it's a readable JS function!
It doesn't stop there... It first makes all calculations on what to display, at last, at the fucking end, it checks a setting whether to proceed the booking or not!!!!
So I found and switched the setting and tried the button again.... Now it fucking works...
No fucking way I am going to tell Exact what the problem is 😫2 -
Just needing somewhere to let some steam off
Tl;dr: perfectly fine commandline system is replaced by bad ui system because it has a ui.
For a while now we have had a development k8s cluster for the dev team. Using helm as composing framework everything worked perfectly via the console. Being able to quickly test new code to existing apps, and even deploy new (and even third party apps) on a simar-to-production system was a breeze.
Introducing Rancher
We are now required to commit every helm configuration change to a git repository and merge to master (master is used on dev and prod) before even being able to test the the configuration change, as the package is not created until after the merge is completed.
Rolling out new tags now also requires a VCS change as you have to point to the docker image version within a file.
As we now have this awesome new system, the ops didn't see a reason to give us access to kubectl. So the dev team is stuck with a ui, but this should give the dev team more flexibility and independence, and more people from the team can roll releases.
Back to reality: since the new system we have hogged more time from ops than we have done in a while, everyone needs to learn a new unintuitive tool, and the funny thing, only a few people can actually accept VCS changes as it impacts dev and prod. So the entire reason this was done, so it is reachable to more people, is out the window.3 -
1. A login window or form appears
2. Enter username
3. Enter p-
4. Another application STEALS THE FUCKING FOCUS
5. Enter half of the (or the whole) password in the app that stealed the focus and press Enter by mere inertia
Or this variant:
4. The username field gets autofocused
5. Enter the password in the username field, out in the clear for everyone to see
DON'T YOU STEAL ME FOCKING FOCUS MATE3 -
Our stand up takes an hour everyday.
Explanation: everyday the same two guys pretty much hijack stand up by talking about tickets that ONLY involve them and has no relevance or dependency to the 8 other guys standing idle. Eventually I suggest they take the conversation offline because the rest of us aren't required. Scrum master gets offended and looks at it me like I've just spat in his face.
Productivity out the window or am I at fault?6 -
Fiddling with the UiPath RPA tool. What the fuck is this monster?
So, you create apps by drawing a flowchart, like some kid using Scratch. Then, suddenly, you have to create a .NET object just to get a random number!
Who the fuck is the target audience that can create objects, call a directory read function, etc, but can't write a loop?! Show me that fucking person.
Then I have to debug the fucking selectors when they don't work correct. All this requires is understanding how UIs are structured under the hood. So, you know that a menu bar is a window, but you need to draw a fucking if statement?!
And how would you debug and manage this monstrosity?
It like we learned nothing from all the Excel apps we build for decades.
I mean, it's an impressive app. But, why does it exist?
Someone needs to stop this before it gets out into the wild or we'll all be debugging flowchart a created by business analysts.
You have been warned. Join the fight or accept the consequences.1 -
Trend:
The Kiki
- idiots get out of there car and dance with the door open...
Me
- Meh. Ghost riding the whip is old news.
——
New Trend:
The Kiki fail
- people get out and either fail or get betrayed.
Me: now I’m on board.
Great examples seen so far...
1. Women get out dancing, drops her bag (on purpose) in dancing. A motorcycle comes along and steals her purse.
Me: Great. I hope they get away with it too. I like the criminals more than the idiot in this case.
2. Dude gets out and starts dancing. Driver speeds up. The guy holds on to the car telling him to “STOP!”. He stops, the guy goes head first through the window of the driver (its down) and I assume right on his head.
Me: mmmmm delicious7 -
So.. I'm giving one of my employers webapps a visual refresher, new company branding and whatnot.
And then I stumbled onto a check that is not returning what anybody expects, and, well , I'm busy fixing things, yeah..? so I go digging.. 🤔
```
function isDefined(obj) {
return !(typeof obj === "undefined") || obj !== null;
}
```
Here's the fun part, these particular lines have been in the code base since before 2017, which is when my Git history starts, because that's when we migrated projects from Visual SourceSafe 6 over to Git. Yes, you read that right. They were still using VSS in 2017.
I've begged and pleaded with my last 3 bosses to let us thrown this piece of shit out our second story window and rewrite it properly. But no, we don't have time to rewrite, so we must fix what we have instead.
I lost 4 hours of my life earlier today, tracking down another error that has been silently swallowed by a handler with its "console.log" call commented out, only to find that it's always been like that, and it's an "expected error". 🤦
Please, just fucking kill me now... I just, I can't deal with this shit anymore.5 -
Windows makes me genuinely angry. Why is it that when I boot my computer, I am expected to wait 10+ minutes for windows to launch 5 startup applications, most of which are already patches for things that should be there to begin with, before I can even begin to use explorer to open GeForce experience because for some reason, windows said "Graphics drivers?! Who needs those?!" And threw them out the window! And then I get notifications about apps needing permissions to things, BUT IT WONT TELL ME WHICH ONE! I clicked the update driver notification 5 minutes ago and the installer literally just now opened up. This is a computer with a r3 processor and gtx970! It may not be the best, but it is by no means underpowered! Why must Halo online not have a Linux version? :(4
-
Currently working in a virtual Linux machine running on a Windows host. The Linux VM is running i3 and I just locked the host for the umpteenth time because my dumbass pressed Win-L to switch one Window to the right...
Also, while typing out the tags, I got the tag-suggestion 'my password is as weak as my mental state' 😂 -
For the first time, wholeheartedly prepared for an interview for a major IT firm, only to be rejected coz i didnt know what methods are present in a library i had never used!! Wanted to throw the guy out of the window!! 😑3
-
Apple: Mojave update breaks OpenGL code and causes a black screen? It's ok, no rush, nothing to fix here. Anyways OpenGL is deprecated right?
I literally spent a couple of hours debugging my engine because it would show a black screen until the rendering window was moved or resized. Only to find out it's a known OpenGL bug after the Mojave update. No biggie.4 -
If you wanna think that I'm a bad programmer, that's ok, but I can't put up anymore with Xcode.
Jesus Christ. An entire afternoon spent trying to make an array with two dimensions. I tried every fucking way I found in SO, in the apple site and in every another site that I found in my way.
First: For every example for Swift 3 there's another 10 for Swift <3.
Second: Mutable arrays, as I'm noticing, aren't a thing anymore, so, to declaring array size we go! Except it's impossible to. Tried 3 different ways. Not a single one worked.
Third: Actually, one of the 3 tries worked, for int arrays, and for some obscure reason it won't work for strings, as declaring the array as [String] is too general for swift, I mean, I completely agree with it, a [String] array could contain anything right???? FUCK NO. IT CONTAINS STRINGS YOU FUCKER!!!!
I swear, if the equipment was mine and not from the office, I would have thrown that piece of shit which disconnects from the fucking computer every 30 seconds that apple calls keyboard out of the window already.
Why the fuck do I need to develop for iOS in swift/xcode?? There's so many cross platform alternatives out there, good ones in fact, but no, we must build the applications natively or else the phone will catch on fire according to my boss.
I kinda liked Apple until now.
From now on? Fuck Apple.10 -
Embarrassing screenshare story? Yeah, I've got couple of those.
- Showing one client a VSCode workspace of another client's. I was lucky they didn't escalate or anything.
- YouTube open in PIP mode and accidentally showing that to the higher-ups in company. What made it more embarrassing is that they informed me about it, I thought I was sharing a window not Entire screen.
- WhatsApp open in one window and I accidentally shared it on screen, thinking I wasn't sharing my screen, but I was, and everyone saw my texts with a girl I was "dating" at the time.
- Presenting my entire screen to a client and out of nowhere Epic Games pop up with a notification saying ""Your buddy sent you a message - Ready to start playing?". But that was 11pm so I got off easy.
- Opening sentry to show one thing to the client but they notice many new bugs and I got slammed by my boss for it.2 -
Struggling with Linux driver bullshit today. Trying to update the graphics driver completely hosed the networking, second monitor (HDMI), and I assume a bunch of other stuff. I tried using the Additional Drivers utility and it nearly made my system non bootable. So on my second computer I had to look up how to unfuck my machine using the command line. Yet another classy set of bullshit from Gnome. The driver for all this was trying to fix some java programs that show wonky depending upon where the window is on my second display. After unfucking the machine I found that resetting all the display settings for both displays magically fixed the java program fuckery. How the fuck? Literally setting things like display resolution, default display, moving virtual displays around. This bullshit somehow fixed display problems with java apps.
So I decided there is a perfect OS out there somewhere, but it isn't iOS, it isn't Windows and it isn't Linux. I decided to make the Perfect OS, or P-OS for short. Gonna use P-OS as a fake OS in my games I make. lol15 -
Installed GNOME terminal and so went to uninstall the default XTerm as it seemed unnecessary.
Turns out removing xterm removes the entire X Window System...
I can't remember my username...3 -
Man I have no idea how my company is running as stable as they do. Every time I peak under the curtain of some piece of machinery I find such bad practices…
Just found out our in house database manager only supports listing all objects in a table, updating objects by first reading each row you need to update and only support “select *” queries.
This is after having to argue with some engineers that using http or grpc when interacting with the new service I’m writing in the none-jvm language is better than writing our own driver for their custom rpc and service discovery system.
But like honestly I’d be mad if these decisions had a visible performance impact on the business, but it somehow doesn’t… this is bizzaro world where all I learned from my 8 years experience as a professional goes out the window…1 -
I'm learning Vue.js at home but I'm forced to learn Knockout.js at work because of legacy code. Makes me want to jump out a window.1
-
Just wondering if anyone out there has had any experience with writing a window manager for x11? I have decided that would be a good project to kinda work on my c++ and so I can learn how x-server works. Any tips, tricks or references you guys have? The project is on my github called zwm.7
-
Friend: Hey I am rebasing my commits and got stuck into a weird window and i was not able to come out of it?
Me: It is vi LMAO. Just press `:wq`
Friend: Wait I'm pressing the same but still nothing happened, it is displaying on my screen?
... After 200 messages...
Me: Just close the computer and I am going to Himalayas. Peace6 -
Didn't think I had material for a rant but... Oh boy (at least at the level I'm at, I'm sure worse is to come)
I'm a Java programmer, lets get that out of the way. I like Java, it feels warm and fuzzy, and I'm still a n00b so I'm allowed to not code everything in assembly or whatever.
So I saw this video about compilers and how they optimize and move and do stuff with the machine code while generating the executable files. And the guy was using this cool terminal that had color, autocomplete past commands and just looked cool. So I was like "I'll make that for my next project!"
In Java.
So I Google around and find a code snipped that gives me "raw" input (vs "cooked" input) and returns codes and I'm like 😎. Pressing "a" returns 97 (I think that's the ASCII value) and I think this is all golden now.
No point in ranting if everything goes as planned so here is the *but*
Tabs, backspaces and other codes like that returned appropriate ASCII codes in Unix. But in windows, no such thing. And since I though I'd go multiplatform (WORA amarite) now I had to do extra work so that it worked cross platform.
Then I saw arrow keys have no ASCII codes... So I pressed a arrow key and THREE SEPARATE VALUES WERE REGISTERED. Let me reiterate. Unix was pretending I had pressed three keys instead of one, for arrow keys. So on Unix, I had to work some magic to get accurate readings on what the user was actually doing (not too bad but still...). Windows actually behaved better, just spit out some high values and all was good. So two more systems I had to set up for dealing with arrow keys.
Now I got to ANSI codes (to display color, move around the terminal window and do other stuff). Unix supports them and Windows did but doesn't but does with some Win 10 patch...? But when tested it doesn't (at least from what I've seen). So now, all that work I put into making one Unix key and arrow key reader, and same for Windows, flies out the window. Windows needs a UI (I will force Win users, screw compatibility).
So after all the fiddling and messing, trying to make the bloody thing work on all systems, I now have to toss half the input system and rework it to support UI. And make a UI, which I absolutely despise (why I want to do back end work and thought this would be good, since terminal is not too front end).2 -
Any other IT company is like:
* Task -> Designer -> Markup coder -> Backend -> Finish
Our IT company:
Act I: "Art of setting up contact with idiots".
------
Items:
*Cave scripts (aka "typical task")
Designer: -- "DAFUQ?"
Customer: *gives another interpretation*
Designer: -- "Erm... really? White text on white background?"
Customer: -- "Make a decision by yourself. I was expecting much more independence from you. You are an expert after all."
Designer: -- "Well. I'm making decision by myself. The text will be placed *here* and will be gray-colored, because *bla-bla-bla*"
Customer: -- "I disagree."
Designer: *1 hour of silence later* -- "Well...k."
Act II: "Design meets ar(u)tist"
----
Items:
*Something, that was drawn by dumb kid while smashing his own head against desk. (PSD layout)
* Salt (to pour it on open wounds)
Designer: -- "I'm seeing this task *this way*"
Markup: -- "And how do u think i should get this done? Have you even seen what you made?? This is bullshit!"
Designer: -- "It's not bullshit! It's a sci-fi themed layout!"
Markup: -- "With gameplay elements and graphics from Alien Shooter??"
Designer: -- "Well, I don't care." *brings new edits and changes*
Markup: -- "????"
Designer: *smug face* -- "!!!"
Act III (7 days later, 9 hours till deadline): "Short story about boy, who was trying to hang himself, but instead fell out from window."
----
Items:
*Markup, smelling like it went through hell and back (x1)
* Markup coder with fried butt (x1)
Backend: -- "What. Is. THAT?"
Markup: -- "It's a work we should complete in 9 hours."
Backend: -- "WE?? I know u mean me, but that's a nightmare. What the f*ck were you doing all this time?"
Markup: -- "Well..." *finds out that he was only watching films and sleeping* "I was making this thing up..."
Backend: -- "You mean "f*cking" *this* thing "up"?"
Markup: -- "Not without it"
(*3 hours of edits and changes of color from white to white later*)
Backend: -- "Well, let's do this."
*Picks PHP and tries to bundle it up with MongoDB. After some time tries to rewrite everything to JS and starts shouting something like "F***CK" and looking for window to walk through. Figures out that he is on first floor. And that he is too lazy to go upstairs*
Act IV (3 days after deadline): "Pain and misery":
-----
Items:
*Something covered with insul(t)ating tape. (Final product)
Customer: -- "Really?"
Team: -- "Kinda."
Customer: -- "Well, thanks for your work anyway. It feels like it's going to disassemble right in my hands but it just works. Oh, also, you didnt made this in time, so your payment will be over9000 times lower. That's all"
Backend, on fluids: -- "Well...yeah..."
Markup: -- "Don't look at me like that. I really was doing my job."
Designer, with twitching eye: -- "Huh, I see. You worked so hard that we have nothing to eat now. Thanks for that."
Backend: ...1 -
With a recent HAProxy update on our reverse proxy VM I decided to enable http/2, disable TLS 1.0 and drop support for non forward-secrecy ciphers.
Tested our sites in Chrome and Firefox, all was well, went to bed.
Next morning a medium-critical havock went loose. Our ERP system couldn't create tickets in our ticket system anymore, the ticket systems Outlook AddIn refused to connect, the mobile app we use to access our anti-spam appliance wouldn't connect although our internal blackboard app still connected over the same load balancer without any issues.
So i declared a 10min maintenance window and disabled HTTP/2, thinking that this was the culprit.
Nope. No dice.
Okay, i thought, enable TLS 1.0 again.
Suddenly the ticket system related stuff starts to work again.
So since both the ERP system and the AddIn run on .NET i dug through the .NET documentation and found out that for some fucking reason even in the newest .NET framework version (4.7.2) you have to explicitly enable TLS 1.1 and 1.2 or else you just get a 'socket reset' error. Why the fuck?!
Okay, now that i had the ticket system out of the way i enabled HTTP/2 and verified that everything still works.
It did, nice.
The anti-spam appliance app still did not work however, so i enabled one non-pfs cipher in the OpenSSL config and tested the app.
Behold, it worked.
I'm currently creating a ticket with them asking politely why the fuck their app has pfs-ciphers disabled.
And I thought disabling DEPRECEATED tech wouldn't be an issue... Wrong... -
Can we please stop making everything in javascript? Pretty please?
Like, I get it, js makes it easier to find developers and speeds up development, but writing a compiler to run on node? That doesn't make any sense to me. Typescript is taking ~11s to compile a medium-sized project, out of which ~9s are just type-checking (if I disable type-checking it takes ~2s to compile). Even Rust, which is considered to have a slow compiler (because of the borrow checker I assume) takes less time to compile a project of roughly the same size.
This is getting very irritating. If I want to keep type-checking, every single time I make a change on a single file I have to wait 11s before any tests start running. This was heavily affecting my productivity (and sanity), so I decided to disable type-checking and threw out the window 90% of Typescript's advantages.
Why the hell wasn't typescript written in an actually performant language? Just so you could say that typescript is written in itself? I don't get it, I really don't.14 -
So here's how the story goes.
I was in my academic writing class the other day and we were learning about APA formatting for our argumentative essays. We have a blackboard, whiteboard, projector connected to a pc and even a lovely projector screen to present with in the classroom.
I sit at the front right of the room. Closest to the window(it's behind me as all the desks face inwards)
Professor walks up to front of class and says we are going to learn how to format our typed essays properly.
Awesome, I thought. Pulled out my XPS laptop and fired it up. As I was making a new Word document, I hear scratching. I look up and the professor is writing with CHALK on the BLACKBOARD. I was astonished. Making matters worse, she started from the far left of the board from which the glare from the window was the greatest. I could not see anything. And from that point on I knew this class was going to be abysmal.
What was so depressing was my professor never once touched the projector. Scraping and erasing. Over and over. Couldn't see if it was a period or a comma after the first initial.
My eyes were never so dry from squinting, rolling my eyes and face-palming over and over. After an hour and 15 minute class, I was not far away from drowning my XPS in my tears.6 -
The joys of bring a Fullstack developer..
Sometimes beings junior Fullstack developer I find myself in tricky situations.
This past week I was invited to a meeting with all the front-end developers where we were presenting our software when a 500error popped up...( I was day dreaming looking out the window watching two birds hop around)Then I heard one developer ask what the problem was and another quickly replied "backend problem"... Still half asleep and deep in my new found interest in birds I blurted out "maybe the front-end is not sending the request properly".... Immediately the room fell silent... this sent a chill down my spine and I was brought back to reality, I looked round the room and everyone was staring at me like I insulted their mothers... I tried to make a joke of it but saying "Sorry I forgot this was a front-end meeting"... The lead architect who for some reason was also present then said "at least someone sees things differently"... And everyone laughed (although I'm not sure how sincere their laughs were).1 -
Roof is leaking... Due to rainy stormy weather here, I have now 3 buckets in my flat for catching the water.
Next thing that broke was the faucet in the kitchen... Whoever installed the kitchen (inherited from previous tenant) was a fricking fuck nugget. Not only are most important parts like the stove unbalanced (cooking is very fun...) - but most things were wrongly installed.
The rubber band under the faucet was a few mm larger than the faucet itself... Stretched out as someone really tightened the screws... Too tight. Friction tore the rubber band on one side. Note that the faucet is one of the large, pompous ones which weigh a fuckton. So the fucking faucet now - as the rubber band tore - turned into a sprinkler as the faucet moves due to water pressure.
Ok. Faucet out, new faucet in. Shouldn't be that hard.
Wait. Wtf?
Turns out they didn't use a milling head... The hole is a cone, top larger - then getting smaller.
Ok. No problem.
Let's do some drill action.
Uhm. Why is the place to the window wet... Oh. Great. Another leak.
*some mopping action*
Back to the kitchen. Realizing I didn't fully close the valve for water -.
Kitchen cabinet, next mopping action.
Water with saw dust is pretty ugly combination -.-
Aka: My relaxing Saturday became a full blown """Fuck you with an anchor""" day instead. Thanks universe. Love you hon. Please, next time put at least some lube on the anchor, entry is quite painful.13 -
So i started an (8 month) internship in January. Team of 4 (2 senior/mid level devs + boss) plus 6 or so other people in our other office overseas. Everything was going really well IMHO. Boss's feedback for halfway through the internship was good too.
First 4/5 months were great: loved the team, got feedback and help when i needed it, wasn't stuck doing support too much, etc.
This all changed when both the devs moved to our other office. My boss works from home a lot and has frequent meetings, so i hardly see him. I have a 1 hour window first thing in the morning if i need help from the devs overseas. After that im on my own.
If i get stuck, even on something very small that a more senior dev could explain in 2 minutes, I'm stuck either unable to work or figuring it out (wasting hours of time) for the rest of the day.
On top of this, since I'm the only one around in our office, im stuck on support every week which takes hours of my time usually. Last week support ate up most of my week, which put me way behind schedule on my other work. (That was an unusually busy week of support.)
Feeling incredibly frustrated right now, just wanted to get this off my chest.12 -
A quick rant about dependency injection.
I see far too often in projects, a huge over-reliance on dependency injection / IOC frameworks which permeate throughout the entire codebase.
I cringe every time I see a constructor annotated with @Inject and 10 params.
The benefit of these frameworks is how easy they make it to manage many dependencies. What I dislike about them, is exactly that. I feel that they make it TOO easy to manage many dependencies.
How trivial is it to simply add another constructor param? exactly. And people then wonder why their dependency tree looks insane.
I am a strong believer in injecting dependencies the traditional way, via the constructor with no fancy framework. The reason being that it forces you to think more about the dependencies you are adding to your classes, and consider if they are really all needed.
The other problem I have with it, is it basically encourages you to inject everything because its so easy. The purpose of dependency injection is inversion of control and allowing classes to depend on abstraction rather than concrete implementation. All that goes out the window when you @Inject 6 different concrete classes.
Use dependency injection for its intended purpose, not as an excuse to be lazy and avoid thinking about dependencies.3 -
Okay this is 3.30 AM . Just woke up from bad geeky dreams. My heart is pounding so fast that I could nose bleed and I can't sleep as I am remembering I had the same dream last night.
Dream was about : me being astronaut. Everything was usual. From rocket launch to be in space. Scary part was my ship in orbit of moon.
Seeing dead land from that height chocked me. Imagine you are looking out of the window and all you see a big grey land and pitch black in background. Realising there is no one out there was spooky.
The scary part was I launched some satellite but crash on surface. It was scary seeing something going smaller every time. Crashing on deserted land was one plus on adding fear.
Then my ship leave the orbit (from the reverse shock of that satellite dittachment ) and it flow away in the vastness of space......
Away from the moon and away from the earth in long loneliness.
I wish I could erase this from my memory but I am not gonna watch space exploration video anymore.
I got to say, landing on moon is one thing but being out there knowing one accident and you will be forever there. You need balls to be on such missions.4 -
This was meant to happen eventually with this lock-down and WFH thing. In the beginning everything was fine but then my brain has completely lost the ability to distinguish between work place and home.
I am neither able to work properly or rest/sleep and productivity is out of the window.3 -
My windows defender has gone out of the window.
Now whenever i open windows security app, it shows a blank page.
There's is no tray process running and I can't find any service too.
I know it's a huge virus attack.
Can anyone suggest some methods to know what is causing this problem?
This has happened once before. That time i used DISM and checked windows files integrity. It replaced corrupted ones and then windows worked fine.
This time i want to know the cause.
I wanna root it out and rip it apart.11 -
For windows: Sublime
For linux tty: Vim
VSCode is a bloated piece of shit which can't open a folder without rebooting the whole window. It's only nice next to the rest of the bloated shit out there.19 -
fuck you rant
fuck you fake developer
fuck you colleague
throw your laptop out of the window, you are fucking useless
you are still fucking going your own fucking way you fucking piece of shit
fuck you9 -
I'm trying to upgrade my account passwords etc. keepass (password manager) doesn't generate resizable windows, so when I want to generate a new password or do anything that creates a new window, THE NEW WINDOW IS TOO TALL FOR ME TO SEE WHAT'S AT THE BOTTOM AND THERE'S NOT EVEN THE OPTION TO SCROLL OR ZOOM OUT. YOU'RE OPEN SOURCE AND GIVING ME THIS BULLSHIT? If you were a living creature you'd be a giraffe with short stubby legs. Your missing features mean you don't get the best leaves and leave you dining with the rest of the peasants. At least I can interact with what I CAN see and closing the window prompts me to save changes, and passwords are generated by the rules I can actually see to manipulate.
Maybe I should look into the source or look at others' screenshots to see what I can't and tab into it to make blind changes, but I'm sufficiently happy with the passwords it gives already. I'm just pissed something so well rated has a flaw like that. Like a game where some levels are locked and you can't unlock them through play -_-2 -
I've been doing alot in eclipse recently and the keyboard shortcut for the intellisense window is ctrl + space. Suddenly I was asked to update some documentation; 10 minutes it took me to figure out word doesn't have intellisense!
-
After the anniversary update and guess what!!! this window does resize, cropping out the rest of the text. 😂 I'll keep you'll posted on what fuck ups to look forward to!5
-
!rant
Recently I started to be interested in how code actually work. I do a for-loop or an if-statement but how do they actually work at the lowest level.
Another thing I've been interested in is security. I thought about learning how to hack my own systems in order to learn how to write more secure code and keep people out. But I'm a little afraid that as soon as I start look at how to hack, the police will storm through the window and take my computer 😂😂8 -
Have decided I'm never coding anything sober ever again, do my best work after few and somehow become the code whisperer...
Been struggling to get notifications on my Vala application to work outside of my test project... Spent about 4 days trying to work out why only to realise I never initialised it as a GTK application and only created a GTK window, so I've been trying to use some of the back end aspects when all I have actually done is create a front end with nothing else... Ugh2 -
I know I ranted about this before but...
FHEGYOQOBGMLAEBFOEBFKHIOQMBEVCOFARQIJSABUEVEUANGIWN
Dumbass me thought "I know it's fucked up in the past but give it another chance". My google home decided to delete all of my alarms. It will not be getting another chance.
I woke up 3 hours later than expected on a normally smooth day and now I going to be late to class and I'm anything but calm.
I'm about ready to frisbee this shit out my window. -
So now they don't need it... So basically 2-3wks of work gone out the window...
Well at least I get paid either way and now I don't have to worry about releasing code that will might blow up in PROD... -
I am not a php dev and I have nearly 0 knowledge of php. All I know about php is that xampp is your friend and you have to write that $ everywhere. But that one day I had to setup phpLDAPadmin on apache2.
I have nothing against php, but I just don't want to have anything in common, since I'm just perfectly fine with my java.
So I had to make it work. Fought my way through different incompatible versions of php and phpldapadmin only to see "not found" on phpldapadmin.
I thought, like, wtf?? Especially when index.php of apache2 is displaying just fine? I mean, I can "edit" some php code, but configs and php setups are just something like out of my world. Tried setuping it on different vms - same result. I've buried way too many hours into this with no result. Finally I gave up and contacted a friend of mine which is like php god for me. He did same thing as I did in ~ 10 mins, but the result was the same. Tweaked some configs - same. Scratched his head, sat for 5 more minutes, did something and boom - it works!
I've asked him, what is that php magic and the answer killed me:
"Index.html was missing"
At that moment I just wanted to exit through the window. Sadly, there were no way to open it.
Yes, I am this stupid in php. But I still miss all these wasted hours...2 -
Recently I experienced a feeling of being fed up with the screenshot tools on Linux.
There's a build in one in Kubuntu called "Spectacle" which isn't really that much of a spectacle as it pushes my displays to the left until there's nothing left on my second screen and half of my first screen is missing.
There's Shutter, which has always been slow for me. Plus there's the fact that the cursor in "capture rectangle" mode is hard to see for me :v
There's Kazam which doesn't seem to allow me to select a save path from the terminal.
There are others of course, but I wasn't really going to bother and instead decided to ask myself "how hard would it be to make my own?"
Turns out not hard at all :v
I now have a screenshot tool which is fast, small, takes region captures and takes window captures.
I guess next step (if I can be bothered) is to set up slop+ffmpeg to do screen recordings
https://github.com/inabahare/...5 -
!rant
I have about a week of holidays left before my classes start and I'm thinking about creating a notepad with password protection and cloud sync so it can be accesed on other devices.
So this is how it will work.
Probably the same interface as windows notepad so no one notices. It can be used to write a personal diary or anything that you don't want other people to know. It will ask for a 4 digit code when you open it(at first you'll see some text, you'll just enter you pin after that text and without pressing enter if you pin is write you'll see the text changes to your previously saved text and if your pin is wrong no error will be displayed itll work as a normal text editor for intruders and probably this wrong pin will be sent to you on you emil with other info). Now even if yoy minimize the window you'll have enter the pin again or even your windows gets out of focus. So you can have it open all the with out worrying.
I'll be using C# for this which I have no experience with. But I'll get it so no problem here.
Provide your feedback on this with some suggestions.
*Sorry I didn't post it on calebs section because I don't have $10.6 -
At first, you're just a baby who cries and poops.
You outgrow the baby clothes, the crib and the stroller.
Then, you're just a child who plays, runs around and starts school.
You grow tired of your toys and are no longer allowed in the ballpit.
Then, you're just a teenager who curses, sulks and defies your parents.
You grow tired of teen music, stow your stuff away and move out.
Then, you're just a student who finally gets to drive a car and vote, but has no money.
You get a job, a place of your own, start dating and fall in love.
Then you're just a noob at everything you do; new at work, newly in love; feeling your way through life.
You have children and no longer have time to spare for anything else.
Then, you're just a parent taking parental leaves, attend parent-teacher meetings and neglect your friends.
You're no longer welcome in the children's games, or even to talk to them.
Then, you're just an "old fart" or "bitch" who's only good when you give them dough.
You help the children move out, you retire and have grandchildren.
Then, you're just a senior citizen who talks about nothing but your grandchildren and go window shopping outside the pharmacy.
You're hearing and vision get impaired, you get ailments and lose your memory as well as your intellect.
Then, you're just dead.
So, at what stage of life are you really somebody?13 -
This is an old one that I have hacked about to make it fit, so I hope it still works..
There were a business user, a B.A. and a developer on a road trip in the UK when they crossed the border into Wales. (This was antevirum, so that kind of behaviour was allowed back then).
They saw a sheep on a mountainside.
The business user cried out "Look! All the sheep in Wales are black!"
The B.A. tutted and said "Actually, all we can say is that there is at least one sheep in Wales and it is black down one side."
The developer woke up from nursing his hangover in the back seat, peered out of the window and said "How do you know its a sheep?" -
Had a nightmare that scared the LIVING SHIT out of me for some reason where a DoorDash delivery guy was using a new DoorDash feature where drivers rate customers and are allowed to attack their homes. He gave me a shit review for ordering Taco Bell and started throwing mexican food at my window and holy shit I woke up TERRIFIED. It took me a long ass time to recover from the shakes. I have no idea why it scared me this damn bad, it’s not like I was chased by a zombie with a rocket launcher 😂😂4
-
Needed my Windows 10 vm for parallax propeller development again. Should be pretty straightforward:
Start VM. Very unresponsive and Interface glitches with 2GB RAM so I give it 4GB to get on the desktop. Bruh, off to a good start.
Turns out that there are a few updates. So I try to install them. After two fucking hours Virtualbox screams at me for being out of storage. FFS Window$ updates managed to take up like 20GB extra.
Had to install it from scratch since my drive is full. Now my key won't activate because it is already activated. 15min support hotline, because 6*8 characters are necessary for a f*cking Phone activation.
Damage assessment:
1h of my life I will never get back, a barely viable operating system and I'm not even sure if USB passthrough works.
PSA:Gnome-Boxen has a superb unattended installer.8 -
The worst technology i had to deal with was probably a piece of hardware. It was a mini-pc combined with sensors and digital IOs and thus, it should have been able to do process control all by itself.
At that time, there was hardware that did that, but this one had an intel cpu, windows embedded and some powerful libraries pre-installed.
Sounds good, didn't work. The thing was so unstable and buggy and crashed on everything. The sensor part had lots of parameters and the right order was trial and error, documentation didn't match behavior, fixes promised but never delivered.
Lucky for us: it was just a demokit, no real project.
I still remember it with a smile. We got in contact to that company at a trade fair and they had most impressive booth. I also remember their companies image movie from their homepage with developers in dark labs with holographic monitors and the boss in his shiny bright office as he looked out of the window and quoted a famous german author.
Hilarious and sad. :-)2 -
Ok, so I got everything running on Ubuntu 17.10. switched to i3 because holy mother of God is never have to resize a window again!
Switched to using the Von editor mode in IntelliJ because dear lord is it faster!
I love all of it. The only problem? Instead of the 6-10 hours of battery I got in Windows, I get MAX 2 hours in Ubuntu because it's always using the Nvidia card and switching to the integrated Intel causes an instant log out after the log in. (Tried everything already, nothing works)
Still, I love it.3 -
couldnt work out today why some jquery wasn't stopping an elements width overflowing its container.
in the end after 1 and a half hours of wanting to bash my head in, I had the window expanded across both monitors and hadn't noticed the edge of the window was off the screen.
FML! -
!dev
DISCLAIMER: don’t read before going to sleep!
~23.15 power cut, street wide. Solved by switching back plong.
23.48 : I heard multiple times a loud sound, like if someone is trying to break a window or so. So, get out of room, go to hall, light is on there. Continue, ready with phone to call 112. Reaches living, kitchen. Finds grandfather that’s fixing something.
EDIT: 00:19 The water installation started one again I felt scared....
Awesome start of the vacation lol
Maybe I should just go to sleep.
To be honest, I was really scared after that power cut that this was a real thing. Fortunately it wasn’t... That once again proves the developer life, working at night, can be hard.7 -
I’m so frustrated and I don’t know whether to blame my 2015 Mac, Audacity, both, or my present inability to be able to afford a new Mac because EVERYTHING/EVERYONE IN MY HOUSE IS BREAKING, NEEDS THERAPY OR BRACES, AND LIFE IS NOTHING BUT EXPENSES!
I had just finished tediously transferring, restoring, and trying to export tracks from some old cassette I had of a jazz concert I played in years ago. Audacity froze because my Mac is now apparently underpowered at 8GB of RAM. But Audacity autosaves and on restart usually can restore you back to where you left off. So I tried to force quit it.
I couldn’t even force quit the stupid app and had to totally restart. I think that ruined whatever autosave I had because it could only restore half of the work I’d done. Another freeze finished off the Audacity project, making it TOTALLY BLANK AND WORTHLESS. I just deleted the whole damned thing and will have to start over. I WAS MINUTES AWAY FROM BEING DONE AFTER HOURS OF WORK!!!!!
Now the Mac wants to update to a supplemental release. With each release this expensive boat anchor gets slower and slower.
I just wanna throw all tech out the window. Every damned thing is planned obsolescence in 2 years and made in China anymore and I HATE giving that totalitarian regime any more of my money. Apple is complicit. ALL computer companies are. They could just bring the jobs back here and walk the walk, but they’re all talk.3 -
As somebody who works in the industry, 2FA is a great idea, we need to do it more.
As a user, fuck 2FA, I ain't have time for that shit, if you make me type my screen lock once again I will throw my computer out of the window.8 -
Today I had a full-day job interview for a junior data scientist position.
First I met the team which was only like half of everyone because apparently everyone was gone on Fridays. However the few there were really nice.
First task is to do some basic data analysis stuff even though I already spent a week on the coding challenge and sent them all my code/tasks. I log into my machine and create a new virtual environment but can't for the life of me figure out how to use the command line in windows to install packages. Turns out there is some problem with their proxy and they have to log me in on that. Then I am struggling on the keyboard because it's for a language different that my mother tongue and it takes me 3x as long to so the most simple things. All my shortcuts are out the window. Haven't a hard time typing parentheses and brackets. Start freaking out and have a panic attack mid task. I'm sweating bullets. I didn't even make it to the simple visualization tasks much less the models at the end. Time gets called and we all go to lunch and I'm freaking out on the inside the entire time. Angry at myself because I know I am better and just couldn't think.
After lunch I present my code and results from a coding challenge I did weeks prior. People from other teams get invited and I end up getting grilled for 2 hours by 15 people. Questions are flying in from all sides. They ask me almost everything I know about machine learning and some more. Under stress I forgot the name of the optimizer I used and couldn't answer some easy stuff because my mind was racing.
Right now I am on the train home and my body physically hurts. I am disappointed with myself and wish I could have shown up better. Never really froze up like this before.2 -
i had to write some js and css / html for a small project that i work on Django.
GODDAMIT I FUCKIN HATE IT MY HEAD HURTS WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
FUCK IT
LEAVE ME ALONE WITH MY GOD LOVELY PYTHON
OR ANY BACKEND LAGNUAGE(except php of course)
jesus christ i almost threw the goddamn pc out of the window.
fuck front end.11 -
Learnt a lesson today:
Never try out new hotkeys in a SQL query editor window.
Or if you do, at least make sure it's not connected to anything important :)
I was trying out new hotkeys and accidentally executed a SQL deploy script to rename something in multiple stored procedures in a large system.
Thankfully - so I saw after my heart stopped - it was only our QA db so not too bad, just a couple of devs set back.
Who woulda thought ctrl-l would execute :O -
> Blue Prism just stopped working
And that's how 12 time-critical processes in production just went out of the window for no fucking reason other than the sheer malice of those beasts of burden who designed BP in the first place :)
0 days since last catastrophic blue prism crash6 -
!dev. Been working on a simple and 'cheap-ish' enclosure for my resin printer to evacuate fumes out a window. 100% not the best or cleanest looking method but I like it. I don't usually do things with my own two hands so this was kinda fun. Probably will do a V2 in the future with my brother teaching me to do more hands on skills. And a MUCH cleaner end result. This was him telling me what i needed to do and me figuring out the how on my own lol
Now to finish v1 I just gotta put the fan controller outside where I can physically touch it. Cut holes for its wires. Then foam anywhere that stick on door foam didn't work that air can escape. Ohhh and attach the actual duct and window parts -
you know I've watched a lot of people waste their lives.
all the warm and fuzzy sentimentality I grew up to gone out the window, the subject of ownership and personal possession disrespected to the point that robot people just fucked their only chances of being anything but machines.
its fun.
just like when you people duplicate my past posts on here.11 -
Dancing and singing in my house with windows open!
Volume : 100%
With my Shure SM58: http://amzn.to/2jBvChZ
Neighbors yelling out the window saying "Whoever singing, stop the hell off!"
LOL
ElementD - Giving In
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
*breath in*
FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKK.
OK.
There are many things one can complain about when it comes to windows. But I swear, the worst thing ever invented is this motherfucking "Windows Credential Manager". Basically I have a private and a buissness git account. I worked on a buissness project and pushed my changes. And when I looked in the repo it did commit under my private account. Ex fucking cuse me? Wtf? When pushing I logged in with my buissness account, why on earth did it push with my private account??
*3h of investigation*
Turns out this cunt fuck credential manager stored my private credentials and used them even tho I explicitly pushed with my buissness account. What goatfucker of a developer decided its a good idea to store user credentials without the users permission/without asking, and then uses the stored credentials instead of the one explicitly given??
I swear to god, if this piece of software would be a person, I would have thrown it him of my window(s).2 -
Fuck python
I have no experience in python and barely any in anything else and I want more than anything to learn this fucking language, but I cant launch the simplest fucking script in the world ("hello world.py") without getting a syntax error, not with my code, but with the fucking path which I checked and rechecked a million fucking times. I remember coding in shitty-ass Java using jGrasp for a year in college, and it was fantastic, but sitting here trying to sort out a fucking script in the IDLE shell is making me want to jump off the 10th fucking story. Kill me, please. I tried running in Atom text editor using the "Script" package, but that would have been too fucking convenient. I just keep getting errors and a fucking hourglass next to the name of my code at the bottom of the window, fuck me5 -
Am I the only one to hate Google drive window's client? It Is far slower than OneDrive/Dropbox. If you work inside the drive you could lose shit, If you remove a file window says it can't be removed but after the error message he does it and If you log out the client..It removes the virtual drive with your files on😑😑 what the fuck Google, what the fuck7
-
hdparm -y /dev/sdb # to the rescue for the silence
turns out I could simply reorganize my mounts and spin down my hdd. Now at last can I enjoy the silence...
If I try to listen carefully I can only hear street noises from across the river and a few 9-stores buildings [something ~600 meters] through a closed plastic window and absolutely nothing from my PC.
Now.. Next mission: how to silence those street noises...5 -
I fixed a bug properly... Took down an entire application systems, sometimes you just gotta monkey patch that shit.
So it was a 15 year old cold fusion system and chrome had deprecated some window pop up feature, so I tracked it to the shared function that triggered this, fixed it there, tested it and even got it all past qa.
Turned out some of the other modules on the app had some other logic around this that made it not work there, they had implemented the fallback check without any fallback logic.
Time to rollback a 3 week sprint...1 -
A lot of this might be an assumption based on not enough research on both NestJS and TypeScript, so if something here is not well put or incorrect then please feel free to provide the necessary info to correct me since I care far more about getting dat booty than I do being right on the internet :D
Sooo, a year or so ago I got a hold on the Nest JS framework. A TypeScript based stack used to build microservices for node. Sounded good enough in terms of structure, it is based on the same format that Angular uses, so if you use Angular then the module system that the application has will make sense.
I attempted (last night) to play with the framework (which I normally don't since I am not that much of a big fan of frameworks and prefer a library based approach) and found a couple of things that weird me out about their selling points, mainly, how it deals with inversion of control.
My issue: This is dependency injection for people that don't really understand the concept of dependency injection. SOLID principles seem to be thrown out of the window completely due to how coupled with one another items are. Literally, you cannot change one dependency coming from one portion to the other(i.e a service into a controller) without changing all references to it, so if you were using a service specification for a particular database, and change the database, you would have to manually edit that very same service, or define another one....AND change the hardwire of the code from the providers section all the way into the controllers that use it....this was a short example, but you get the gist. This is more of a service locator type of deal than well....actual dependency injection. Oh, and the documentation uses classes rather than interfaces WHICH is where I started noticing that the whole intention of dependency injection was weird. Then I came to realize that TypeScript interfaces are meeheed out during transpilation.
Digging into the documentation I found about custom providers that could somehowemaybekinda work through. But in the end it requires far too much and items that well, they just don't feel as natural as if I was writing this in C# or Java, or PHP (actually where I use it the most)
I still think it is a framework worth learning, but I believe that this might be a bias of mine of deriving from the norm to which I was and have been used to doing the most.3 -
!rant
Gotta start learn react. Only two frontends in my company know react and it seems my Vue knowledge don't mean nothing... I'm kind of excited, mainly because for a long time I wanted to make mobile apps and with react native I'll be able to do so.4 -
FU OneTab. This is second time you lost my saved tabs. Off you go.
TL;DR OneTab extension has major bug.
Anyone who read my suggestions/comments to use OneTab to save your opening tabs on your Chrome and Firefox, I apologize from here. And suggest you to be careful with it. I know that I have recommended it plenty of times here.
I have no idea what's causing the data lost. I used OneTab since years ago on Chrome and it worked fine. I switched to Firefox when Quantum came out. OneTab came to FF addon repo this year. I was very happy and installed and used it straight away. But it wasn't as good as before.
I don't like to open lots of tabs. Max I have will be a dozen. I like to work different task, different project on different windows. I usually have 2 windows. One window for my personal and social use with tabs like devRant, discord, etc. Second window for one of my projects and I usually work on one project at a time. If I have to juggle among multiple projects unfortunately, I open third or fourth windows respectively.
Hence, saving all opening tabs of a window to be able to open it easily next time is a very useful feature for me. I don't even need those saved to be permanent. I save URLs I frequently visit as bookmarks and URLs I found useful to pocket.
OneTab served that purpose. But losing saved tabs is definitely major problem for me. So I have uninstalled it and now giving a try to Stash. Very new add-on, so I'm still not sure of it yet. On bright side, it is made for Firefox and open-source. OneTab is not open-source.
https://github.com/globau/...
So far Stash is working fine. But I will wait and see for a week or so.2 -
So the thick shit that features in a previous rant of mine (https://devrant.io/rants/782171/...) just decided to pull all my wet clothes out the washer and leave them on the floor all night. Next time he goes out I'm sticking a hose through his window, fucking moron now I have no clothes for work tomorrow... Bastard
-
Anyone of you use Jetbrains IDE‘s? I love them but sometimes, they have weird bugs and it just triggers me everytime so hard, I could take my Computer and throw it out the window.11
-
Fooling Windows is easy and fun :p
My friend got logged out of windows and recovery option was saying to wipe the syatem. There was important data in the windows ( photos, videos , project ) so I thought of a simple solution.
Booted Linux in USB and live booted it on the system. Linux can read the files from window OS. Simply copied the data to hard drive.
Windows be like Am I a joke to you9 -
MS Teams with multiple work accounts account swap flow:
1. Try to close the company-bound login modal 10x while being fast enough to also close the main Teams window.
2. Realize it's not gonna work, so login with the account you don't want to be on.
3. Have to type your phone pincode then accept the MS Authenticator login, and retype your pin code.
4. Finally logged in just to log back out and get the generic account choice modal so repeat step 2 & 3 with the correct account.1 -
Me: “I think I’ll check linkedin today”
Clicks on video: “... good perspective on growth and blockchain micro service apis that leverage ML models for understanding interfaces that welcome scalability within a agile environment...”
Me: *jumps out window*1 -
From the window by my desk I can see helicopters, jet planes and the occasional bird attacking people.
What do you see out your window by your desk?8 -
Long story short:
My system need to talk with a 3rd party PoS API. The provided doc is pretty useless and with few errors.. nonetheless I came to finish the 99% of the job.
I was stuckd on the 1%, one frickin function.
Everytime I would call the endpoint I would receive...NOTHING. Just a 200.
I've spent like 5 hours trying everything, even sending wrong params...nothing...
Always 200 and nothing else.
Apparently, for an entire nation and the IT Company behind them, is ok to have A PAYMENT API TO RETURN VOID AND A 200 NO MATTER WHAT.
I got the luck/unluck that the main developer of such piece of art came in the office and I've almost throw him out the window (we are at 26th floor).
FUCK OFF DUDE. YOU AND ALL THE OTHERS THAT DO LIKE YOU DO.
P.S. in this days I'll try to write the full story, but it's hard without giving many details...small anticipation: 1.5 months of work and nothing but red bull and coffee...4 -
Hey, javascript people, got a question.
Is there any way to disable sites binding the mousewheel (scrolling) event ? Like for example rebinding it to scroll down at the end of window load ? (tamper/greasemonkey)
I am getting furious with all these sites where they will block the whole site to make you agree cookies & gdpr shit.
Removing the foreground/blocking element is sometimes enough but often the remaining site can't be scrolled.
EDIT: Found out you can add links of script that does this to AdBlock:) For example movieinsider has it's "gdpr, cookies & shit" script at the top of head element. Add it and voilá.6 -
ok this may look like a lazy ass beginner crying out for spoon feeding( which it kinda is), but i want some real industrial training in non documented Android coding.
For last 2 years i have been reading tons of Android articles and documentation on "how to use this library", "how to add this feature", "what this function of this class does", but not much about how to use it efficiently, like the way its used in industry.
When I interned with a startup, all they wanted from me was to push new design changes, fix layout bugs and work as fastly as i could. I had no time to understand their core code, which had so many things that i could have learned : those mvp/mvvm design/architecture patterns, dependency injections, kotlin , coroutines, state management designs, data bindings, eventbuses and handling, and VIPER,RIBS (I mean, not everything was particularly in their code, i picked up a few keywords from here n there)... a lot of stuff that is used by many apps for their codebase.
I can read up these stuff by myself, but i always end up feeling bored coz frankly, i got no big/valuable project to implement it upon and feel excited about it. I feel that open source projects from OSS companies could be my window, but their chat spaces are also mostly empty to discuss/get some guidance.
I want some specific training about these. Can you guys provide any online/offline course/company training/books in this subject, the best practices?1 -
Disconnect from everything that you're thinking of for a moment. Step away from your computer, and dump all of your thoughts out for about five minutes.
In better terms: clear your cache. Your devices need it, and you need it too. Bonus points if you give your eyes a stretch and look outside your window.2 -
So currently working on a basic game engine written in Vala using SDL, fuck me it is such a rabbit hole!
Have a basic renderer and and was using the default SDL frame rate manager and decided to write my own so I could knock out using the SDL gfx package.
So now I have to create a window manager and renderer manager just to handle a basic framerate manager that isn't completely negated by VSYNC.... -
Recently I stumbled upon some articles on the internet claiming you could use window managers on the windows subsystem for Linux. I got a tad too excited, left what I was studying (today I regret it, I just finished a test I didn't know shit about), and started sudoing apt-get install the fuck out of my terminal. Downloaded an X server for Windows and pressed i3 on the terminal.
The server's window was black, but I knew everything was ok, so I pressed alt+enter. My poor eyes melted on the presence of the brightest, whitest terminal window I've ever seen. I must admit I felt really disgusted by the white, but that didn't matter, I had fucking i3 running on my windows laptop. Now when I get home I'll try to fix the dbus problem that prevents gui programs from starting and make everything look pretty. I hope it works!
tldr: I burned my eyes with a white terminal. -
NO ONE'S GIFFED THIS YET?
ok how does ffmpeg work
*takes 3 hours to figure out crop window was invalid since it never tells you*
and it's even applicable. Wonderful.
EDIT: wow devrant makes this look like shit, it's not even at 60FPS anymore2 -
I'm trying out Picolisp. Cool, I think, an OpenGL library. I'll try the example program.
(Clicks mouse on program window)
(A wild SIGILL appears!)
Two hours later, still trying to figure out why it's doing that, with Google and DuckDuckGo returning no helpful results whatsoever. This is very annoying.2 -
p r i n t e r s
I was about to print a bigass document. Wanted to save paper, and saw my printer had a two side mode. I try it out. A few pages print, then the driver says PAUSED - RELOAD PAPER. This is normal, as double sided printing is not automatic. Underneath, there is a message:
[Printing - Manual Duplex: Please reinsert pap...]
I try to resize the window to read the message.
THE MOTHERFUCKING WINDOW WAS NOT RESIZEABLE!!!
are these products not fucking tested???
I find a guide saying the paper should be reinserted with no flips, then the "continue" button should be pressed.
The button was not in the driver UI, or on the printer. Further research showed that you are supposed to:
OPEN THE TONER CHANGE DOOR AND CLOSE IT AGAIN TO CONTINUE A PRINT
what fuCKING designer thought this shit through!?#@?#$!
printers
fuckem1 -
GitHub Actions. That is all.
Well, not really. Trying to convert a grunt script which we have packaging our WordPress plugins to be done as a GitHub action instead and I'm about to throw my machine out of the window.5 -
If I have to write one more uber-complex, goddamn Google Optimize test, I will literally piss and shit and throw up on my computer and then throw it out the window.1
-
I really want to like react but the more I use it the more frustrated I get, I'm sure it's great once you know it but right now I just want to throw my computer out the window
-
For all the iOS Users out there, stick to 10.3.3 (Still a small window to download and verify). Cool gifts are coming out.
-
!rant vim
As i've seen a lot of rants about can't close vim type so I searched and found this in book does it work or not .
Try these: What to Type What it does
:q Quit the current window (or editor if you are out of windows) if there are no unsaved changes.
:q! Quit the current window even if there are unsaved changes.
:qa Quit all windows unless there are unsaved changes.
:qa! Quit all windows even if there are unsaved changes.
:wq Save changes and quit the current window.
ZZ Save changes and quit current window
If you can't get out of vim, you should check to be sure the caps lock is OFF, and press the escape button. If it feels good, press it a couple of times. If it beeps, you know that you've escaped enough. Then these exit commands should work. -
TIL
Ctrl-w tot clear the console Line
Can you believe is was always using Ctrl-c to empty my terminal Line when mistyping?
And out of sheer coïncidence of closing all my tabs, is accidentally die this in my terminal window, and then in was like 'wait What?'11 -
I am the responsible for the atlassian Suite at work, as I maintain the systems, set them up, and stuff.
One day, our crowd (the authentication and authorization application) just went crazy. At like lunch time it could not connect to the AD anymore. No reasons. Throwing XSRF errors (cross site scripting), because http would connect to https. "won't do it, fuck you" it told me. Out of the blue. Noone changed anything. And yea, seriously. Noone did.
It just refused to connect (as connecting to AD is connecting yourself with you own api. And refusing yourself talking to yourself). It runs behind a proxy. Therefore http/https. Well, this worked for years. But out of sudden not anymore.
Yea. Fuck you.
It was reported some hours later, at like 3pm, as people could not login to the applications using crowd as authentication and authorization server.
Tried to debug the system, where nothing was did, to make it work. At best time to fail.
First workaround: if you are logged into one of the other applications of atlassian, just refresh the site, so your SSO token gets a refresh and you are signed on again.
Then I searched more and more. And more.
But nothing worked, nothing helped.
So I addressed an emergency maintenance, take down the whole Suite, restart crowd, to apply some changes to it's settings, not knowing what happening then, because all connections of SSO will then be released. Sent out the mail like 30 minutes beforehands.
While waiting for the window, I just typed my credentials... And redid, and redid, so to type and being bored.
Three minutes before the window...
It just worked again.
Well. Wtf. Serioudl
Just came back.
No Intrusion, no changes at all. Just came back, as nothing has happened.
Kind of best part of this story... A headhunter messaged me on my way home to offer me a job as an Atlassian Suite SysAdmin for a company, at kinda the double of my salary.
At first I was thinking to go there, and when someone then asked me sth about Atlassian just start to laugh and then leave still laughing...
But then I very nicely respond that I dont want to cry at work. And wished him best luck.
I am doing some bad upgrades now on our Suite. Very painful.
And I looked into the start scripts. Some Look like the untalented intern tells another one to write scripts. Seriously wtf.
Today I followed the guide to Update a confluence and change database to Postgres. Didnt work, Postgres error.
Try it again, jquery won't load. Next try, tomcat not starting anymore. Did same thing. Every fucking time.
Yea. Maintenance window to get a nice new export soon. Will only take an hour.
To switch database in confluence, you need to set it up very fresh. And then Import your export.
Export takes an hour at our system.
Importing maybe the same time. Hope it will work (hint: Nope).
Oh, can be nice also. Just tell the Bitbucket to migrate databases, there is a fucking setting for it. Enter new database, ready, go, finished.
At least they don't raise costs very much every kinda year.
Oh sorry, yes, they do.4 -
!rant
Doing the Professional Scrum Developer Cert today. I feel terrified by the thought I might be throwing 200$ out of the window.
┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘ 彡[$̲̅(̲̅200)̲̅$̲̅] ロ
Any tips highly appreciated. -
How about a rant about devrant?
Where the heck can you find info about how stuff works within a rant?
How do I embed a picture or a link properly?
How do I use the smileys?
Actually, the post-window itself should empower the user to do these things, but all you get is the attach image thingy.
I presume this all works out of the box when ranting with your mobile phone or something, but using the port rant thing on the site, I have no clue.
So, can someone please link me to the OBVIOUS location where this info can be found and that I missed? Thanks.22 -
So apparently, some guys emailed me saying "we found your details on Github as someone with Salesforce knowledge..."
Except I don't know a fuck about Salesforce except that it's called as such and pays well, and I have never used it in my life, let alone have a repo up. Can somebody please explain to me how these idiots think they can trick us developers out of all people with these bullshit enails?
I actually got a bit hopeful when I saw the subject "Hi, we found your details on Github"; then that flew out the window as soon as I opened it 😭😭😭 -
CSP: the thing that finally makes me jump out a window.
It's not that it's bad per se... well, I mean, it is, in several ways... but I can cope with it.
But when you're being pushed to apply a very strict policy to an app that is (a) itself 10 years old (predating CSP and most modern practices entirely you'll note), (b) has code that originally came from a 15-year old app at its core, and most critically (c) uses a third-party library that is at the very heart of it all and that simply can't ever play nice with CSP due to its fundamental nature... well... that's a recipe for an awful lot of head-meet-wall.
And you're not going to do a ground-up rewrite of an app that cost literally millions to develop (and is constantly being grown to this day) and which is now mission-critical and very highly regarded by the most important clients.
FML. -
I've been given two months to make an AR app that gives information on buildings seen out of the window of a client's skyscraper office.
So off I go, smash together some Ar.js in a few days because it looks easy. Yet I quickly find out that the compass on mobile phones are completely trash. Every device I try has true north randomly chosen from anywhere between 10 degrees wrong or full on 180 degrees the opposite direction. It's a miracle that none of these devices have managed to stumble onto true north by luck. I'm getting suspicious that ar.js is actually just mapping coordinates based on north instead of true north or something ridiculous. This likely won't be helped by GPS interference from the skyscraper.
It isn't helped that ar.js is a steaming pile of bugs on top of bugs, many of the examples taken straight from documentation straight up don't work.
I'm trying to get ar.js with three.js now in the hope that I can figure out some kind of true north calibration controls as an offset to whatever the phone says north is.
If anyone has any suggestions for a better solution that would be grand.7 -
Peace and quiet.
I'll play some smooth jazz or light classical, sit in my beanbag chair by the window, and take a 30 minute nap.
When I'm done, either the problem isn't a problem anymore or I have figured out a solution to my problem in my sleep.
This is something pretty new to me since wfh started and is one of the many of reasons why I will never go back.4 -
I can't connect the fucking safari debugger to the fucking iPad.
It opens the window and closes it after a few seconds, or sometimes (1 time out of 20) it just works, without no fucking reason.
And you should wonder "why are you asking for help here, that's not the fucking StackOverflow" the problem is that I don't know where else to ask. The next step will be resurrect Steve Jobs and just ask him why10 -
Building migration day. Movers were late so ended up moving my system on my own. Once everything was set up I realized there were no chairs. Once sorting out all that I realized the AC was conked, resolved to not give up and started work, the moment I loaded up all my files and started working the whole floor lost power. Currently staring out the window thinking about the meaning of life (or lack thereof) :')
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So we got new keyboards at the office. Turns out mine doesn't register the modifier keys well, resulting in plenty of selecting and replacing text with "z", "/" or whatever key I pressed along with it. You can't believe the amount of times my new toy almost flew out of a sixth story Brussels' window in the last couple of days. Anyway, still too lazy to go ask for a new keyboard.1
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"All Tech Projects Run Over Budget"
https://medium.com/@team_96861/...
I was on a nice streak of being calm for a while and then this article just dropped today. Fuck management and fuck whichever dumbass wrote this piece of shit.
Is anyone else pissed off at this? It makes it sound like software engineers are slow and never on time, and the main reason for a project's failure is the inability of programmers to meet deadlines. I find this a little sus, especially as it's written by someone in a management position.
I would argue that projects fail because:
1. Management takes the very feasible timeline given to them and throws it out the window, opting to impose impossible deadlines instead, because FUCK your employees right?
2. Clients have requirements that can't be met (I agree w/ this from the article, but not the part about developers not accounting for issues--I always do this and everyone I know does this)
3. Technical Debt arising from when management tells the software engineers to *just do it this way because it's cheaper*
The calculator they made is nice but it's also quoting estimates that I and everyone I've spoken to agree with, so this is clearly not a software engineer problem, it's a fucking management problem. "Budget" = accounting's job.
/rant
That being said, the "take their quote and triple it" part had me dead...1 -
every time a popup window pops out above another popup i imagine a little innocent bunny massacred by some wicked PM
-
Mum: you can't figure out how to close the latch on that window, what sort an engineer are you?!
Me:😒1 -
!dev-related
The charging port on my Galaxy S8 is messed up and is constantly disconnecting while charging, which results in the phone either slow charging or just got charging at all.
I thought I got the monthly phone insurance through Verizon and I was just gonna pay the deductible and get the phone replaced, but apparently I don't actually have the insurance even though I could've sworn I did. So that option is out the window.
So now I'm left with 3 other options:
1.) Pay $100 to get the charging port repaired at a local repair shop
2.) Pay off the remaining $200 I owe on the phone and get a phone upgrade from Verizon (because I am due for an upgrade)
3.) Get the upgrade but still keep my current phone on my plan and just pay the remaining $200 off monthly like I have been since I got the phone, except I'd also be paying for a second phone. Which is fine, because either way I'd be paying the $200. It's just a question of paying it in a lump sum or paying it monthly. Either works for me, it's $200 both ways
The downside of upgrading now is that I wouldn't be able to get the Galaxy S10 when that comes out, and that's what I've been waiting for as I prefer the smaller Galaxy S phones over the Galaxy Notes.
I suppose I could trade in whichever phone I get when the S10 comes out, but that would be a huge hassle and I'd have to pay at least 50% of the phone off in order for it to be eligible for trade-in
Decisions decisions.7 -
New dev colleague today asked me why he cannot save his work in our automation platforms.. Naturally I asked what errors pop-up. He sent me screenshot of window which appears when you want to check for compilation errors, not saving your work. Out of frustration, I couldn’t help but laugh and asked what I’m supposed to do about it.. I still had to explain him the thing. Sometimes I feel like I’m not dev but detective in ‘stupid people doing $hit’ department
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If you have an old computer, here's what to do:
1. Find a tall building with a window, preferably on the top floor.
2. Throw your computer out of said window.
3. Enjoy your new computer!3 -
today started as a great sunny day. but really my nightmare began a couple of nights ago. i installed gnome on linux by accident, all i wanted to do was create a desktop link to a webapp in my files. Since then, I have been offered updates by ubuntu. well today i couldnt pass up the offer. and after the update my broadcom driver stopped working. has anyone dealt with the bullshit that is broadcom on linux?! i wanted to reset the connection so i click to stop using the driver. window comes up says its out of date. now the driver has completely disappeared! wtf!!! now i need a dark wizard and to sacrifize my first born to get internet on my baby back.... fuuuuuuuu
plz help if you know..
stuck at work so wont be able to try till tonight. anxiety is real6 -
today has been one of the worst day of my life
- the parking situation went out of hand : i bought a new car 2 days ago, nd since last 2 days i have been just taking it out to practice for 1 hr in morning with the trainer. today one of our pesky neighbour took this opportunity and parked in our spot. i had to call my friend in the early morning to get it parked in a place far away from home . my new car is parked in an unsafe place , just because the neighbour wants to make me mad 😭
- office announced that since cto is coming, you must do wfo fod next 2 days. our office is tuesday nd Thursday, now i will have to go on friday too. plus our team lead is coming, so next weekend is going to be 4days wfo. they are giving random surprises, why not just tell us that its full wfo?
- one of our neighbour's bike got stolen in plain sight. our road is usually having a lot of people going around whole day, as its opposite to park. nd those neighbours have a hon ground floor, so they are almost always outside. we have installed a camera just 2 days ago, nd that caught the incident live. i am 100% sure that if my car had been parked here today, then it would have been my car 😭😭😭
- we friends went for a night stroll in my car. the car was mine, but my friend was driving it as he's experienced. we stopped at a food joint. i took the key from him for sometime because i was having fun playing with it . then when we were heading out, our key was gone!
i almost had a mini heart attack. my friends were not messing up with me. fortunately the restaurant had cameras , so we requested for cctv footage. in the footage we found that i accidentally put the key in the restaurant menu. and that fucking guy had taken away the menu!!!
imagine if he had given that menu to someone else 😭😭😭. our car would have been gone in a moment, as we were not even seeing the car from the window. imagine if the restaurant didn't had the fucking cameras 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
life fucks super bad in a moment of truth10 -
!rant, just looking for some input
I can't find a solution that I like for managing email/calendar in one whack for Linux. I use Debian, and am currently using Evolution mail client, but the calendar doesn't sync with my Exchange. I tried IceDove, but didn't love the mail (or calendar) client.
For my Linux brethren out there, what do you use to manage email/calendar? I've heard G-Suite used a lot, but I'd rather have native software than a dedicated browser window.
Thanks ahead of time.4 -
I haven't had anything dev related to rant about in a few weeks due to the fact that I haven't done any developing in a few weeks. I have a lot of personal shit going on that I'm slowly getting past. Basically some shit went down, the girl I posted about a few times, we're just friends at this point. My best friend won't talk to me and hasn't in about 2 weeks now. Fun.
Then there's the fact that I have school Monday through Friday, and work Thursday through Sunday, so I get zero days off. So I just..don't have the time to do developing right now. But, here's a kinda funny story (not that funny)
So this Sunday, I was leaving work. I decided to roll my car's window down to say bye to a few people as I was pulling out of the parking lot. It was cold so I went to roll my window back up....and it's fucking stuck. I'm sitting in about 15°F (-9.5°C) with no driver's side window. Turned out the fucking motor that moves the window had died. And I had no money to get it replaced. So I did the logical thing, I called my mom to try and figure out what I should do. She was asleep but my dad picked up. He called me a dumbass and said he'd pay to get it fixed, since it was his car before and he never told me that the window was faulty.
Actually got it fixed just yesterday by my cousin. Then I went to get my paycheck (a whole $200!) since my work has my name spelled wrong in their system so I currently can't do direct deposit (gonna talk to the general manager about that tomorrow). And now I'm just sitting in bed, waiting for my check to go through. (As I was typing that last sentence, someone from my bank called actually). I would really appreciate that $200 right now, cause I have about $2 after paying for car insurance and gas and stuff. I actually need to fill up my gas soon too..2 -
1 of the many windows rants i will make since i have to use that on work's laptop.
Let's start.
20GB for an IDE? what a joke.
Seriously MS. Are you fucking retarded? You have a fuckin retarded windows store, and i need to open it 3 times for it to be functional? Fuck you.
I want to change the default browser. YES I FUCKIN WANT TO CHANGE IT, STOP FUCKIN ASKING ME 500 TIMES IF I'M SURE ABOUT IT AND DO THE THING I TOLD YOU TO DO. Fuck you.
2GB on startup? Thanks, appreciated. Miss my 250MB on my linux laptop. FUCK YOU.
Did i fuckin tell you i want to sync the onedrive? I clicked that shit to disable it and you decided to sync the fuck out of it? Fuck you.
Candy crash and other retarded games? LOL, can't say anything. The laptop is from the job, i won't bother uninstalling that shit. In any case MS would reinstall them again. Fuck you.
Fans at 100% for no reason and battery draining like it's a cold drink that drinks someone who is thirsty? Thanks MS, very helpful. Fuck you.
Powershell? Well i leave that. Whenever i remember how slow it is i want to throw the laptop of the window. Fuck you.
Notifications? Thanks, it's very good thing to spam them for no fucking reason. Fuck you.
Skype? Who the fuck told you to install it? Fuck you.
Well i won't say anything about their fuckin updates. Every one knows how retarded and piece of shit they are.3 -
I feel like being expected to handcode a user interface by supposed progressives is the most ass backwards idiotic tech decision with long and wide ranging consequences anyone ever farted out of the asshole god bored into their ugly faces!
Why the hell would I want to use web when I could use windows forms ?
Why is there no equivalent to the visual designer that's usuable ?
I mean I get it for more customized things
But why would I want to fuck with css when instead I could do about the same thing and store them in a settings file and point and click on a series of dropdowns and see the results as I create them ?
Why would I want to fuck around with an interface a resize destroys ?
Why would I want to mess with html tagging or tk or tcl containers when I could just drag an item into a window and update it's properties and add some fucking event handlers the stubs of which are automatically generated by a single DoubleClick??!!??
I hate it
It's slow
I want my fucking ui to be done quickly !
Am I just missing some vital tool that costs 5 grand ?16 -
Ok if anyone is interested (Or is having the same issues I had) I have worked out the 2 major issues I've had with elementary OS with Chrome and VMware...
If you were trying to use chrome and go fullscreen but have the browser lock up, try turning on system borders (Pretty sure this forces it to use GTK instead of googles weirdo window)
And if you had an issue with VMware locking up when booting a VM, run it as root...
(Felt like I needed to share this incase anyone else is having the same issues)1 -
One of the most stupid phrases I hear again and again is "to not reinvent the wheel". Guess what, if no one had ever dared to take the first iteration of something, throw it out the window and start from scratch, we'd still be living in the stone age. If you're gonna use a library or a framework, fine, that's totally valid. Just make sure to actually understand the tools and code you're working on. People now tend to use these without knowing exactly what they do. And then once the original authors retire, no one knows what to do if something breaks. There can't be innovation if you don't try to reinvent. Don't shy away from writing from scratch sometimes.
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Tried figuring out why my console window did only put out text sometimes, tried to figure that out for about three hours. Turns out visual studio redirects console output to their own console window by default if you start it in debug mode.
Lesson learned: The second answer on SO which is not marked as correct might be correct for you. -
Python is an example of a language which is far, far too high-level for my liking; to provide a reference for my preference, C++ is one of my favourite languages, because it is versatile while remaining somewhat verbose, while Python tosses that verbosity out of the window while not functioning as one would expect it to function after reading a lot of the documentation.3
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Just typed this into the Python interpreter and my whole system just froze. Guess I have to do a force shutdown.
x = list(range(1, 999999999))
So is there a way you can somehow configure your linux system such that the window manager/system is never out of memory or processor time? So that atleast I get can atleast kill the process which is freezing the system.3 -
In the relatively-near future , we will laugh out loud when we think back of the times when every person had a big box of CPU (or even chunky laptops) ,because the movement towards cloud based systems and further development of AI will make the CPU'S an absurd entity.
every device we would have would just be a window (😂) to access the central system.3 -
Best thing about having two screens and rectangle is that you can collect all the security pop-ups on the smaller one and just continue working till it's actually convenient to restart everything. (Like after the meeting)
Seriously corporate security measures are completely fucked. Not only did they manage to slow down even Go compiles to a crawl with defender and other crap. Just tried to write 6 words to our PO. Focus got stolen by 4 of the 6 words typed.
One of them demanding to restart Firefox and that one can't be closed or moved out of the way unless you have some fancy window manager tool. This isn't security this is harassment.4 -
In php how would I "visit" another user cause a lot of people say use
$_SESSION["username"] = $_POST["username"]
or
Echo $_SESSION["username"]
Or
Echo $_POST["USERNAME"]
Are any of these good or should I just feck the computer out the window 😂13 -
Starting to wonder why I tend to like our QA people so much: they often seem so much saner. Yes, sometimes they quibble as with the complaints about a page that is hidden from the user anyway, but they would usually not creep to deep into the hole creating most unintuitive workflows and abysmal logic.
Disclaimer: We're more like backend devs, but we had to do a UI which was beautifully slaughtered by the CEO messing with it - guess what's happening with the new one - and because of that... thing I already nearly smashed my Mac because stupid entered credentials for updating software would only be applied if you defocused once out of the password entry box. Fucked up stuff like this, which devs meddle with, give up, just shrug it off and dump it on the (l)user.
Or a more recent example: So PM wanted a stupid "Apply to all" buttons on a list that can be filtered. Guess to which items the actions should be applied if you filtered it and you currently only see a small selection in your window! Yes, of course it still applies to all items in the universe. QA guy who's just trying the buttons comes to me: "Hey, you sure this "apply all"-stuff supposed to work like that?"
Third example to end this long QA-praise: So there is this virtual appliance we build and we should support another stupid hypervisor.. and he found the kernel modules I have to activate additionally so we can just convert the existing image without having to create a new build system.3 -
switched job. found out today that my qa - soon to be promoted to senior - does not know what a csrf token is.
*stares out of window*2 -
So I started out in 2010ish as an intern, entirely remote. It let me attend school in my home state while working for a company elsewhere. Fast forward to 2017, I leave that company to work at a college, as a hybrid model. Found I was more productive on days that I was home/working from the lab versus days I was in the office. Skip to 2018, I get a job working for the Air Force which is ALSO hybrid. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't as good for me as when I was remote. In 2019 I started working for NYS and had to report to an office full time. YIKES was that not for me. My mental health started slipping, my physical health went out the window, and I barely got anything done. Along comes COVID and I'm back to 100% remote! Well, NYS Gov Cathy GoKill is trying to push state employees back to the office, and I really don't want to deal with that unnecessary stress again. Ever. Does anyone have any tips for starting out or looking for employment in the private sector, when my priority would be staying remote?
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Best prank of me? I think: Making a screenshot of the desktop and setting it as the desktop background. It was funny to watch people trying to move the items. We also locked the screen and moved the unlock window almost out of view (windows xp). They tried opening the browser or the start menu, nothing worked...1
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When you're on the way to a client with two colleagues and take the back seat... so you awkwardly stare out the window for an hour because it's too noisy to speak to the guys up front.
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Does anyone else have the problem that the XAML design window in VS2017 kind of freezes all the time? Can't zoom in/out or click on any element in it. Not that I develop anything in the design anyway, but clicking on an element it's a comfy way to find the corresponding XAML code.
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I swear there is just no documentation on GTK3 themes. I'm trying to change window decorations in an existing GTK theme and there's just no info out there. On top of that my posts for help have gotten a grand total of 0 replies.
If you happen to know where I can find some info about it I would really appreciate it. -
Never have I wanted to drop kick my computer out the window as much as I do right now for my first time attempting to create an Oracle Database
-
Many short meetings.
Trying out cool gadgets like the segway. Looking out of the window all the time for the pizza hopefully arriving the next 10 minutes.
Peeking in interesting but foreign questions at StackOverflow after reading the answers related to the own project.
Googling after the possible causes and possible treatments when experiencing medical problems (without knowing if it's harmless or severe - for yourself or for a family member). -
i don't. and i'm not.
occasionally the thought that i will have some money on cigarettes and booze and the ability to forgwt about existential dread for a few days, that occasionally motivates me a bit, but that's about it. my ambition and dreams and will to do anything ia gone, and now i'm just coasting until such a time when coasting won't be possible anymore, and then i'm gonna jump out of the window or something. -
So yesterday I spat on a bank window coz I wanted to open a regular bank account so I can gain access to their bullcrap belgian payment system that everybody have coz they charge .30 cents per transaction just to access visa coz fuck you.
So I go to the counter and she goes "do you have an EUROPEAN id?" and Im like yea bitch Im belgian why tf do you care?
Then the cunt is like "ok well we want you to redirect your income to us" (like, what about no bitch?), "and also take a home insurance (I already have one and have zero reason to change).
So I got out, came back again to scream that bundled sales was illegal and that I wished them all to get lung cancer and than spat.
But it was a mistake. I should have recorded it and then sued them.18 -
OMG I want to throw my monitor out of my window right now!
Someone just went through my entire project and un-cuddled all of my braces, AND THEN STARTED ALL MY FUCKING VARIABLE NAMES WITH AN UNDERSCORE!!! Are you kidding me??? People actually do that??? That's literally worse than php's brilliant idea of starting every variable name with a dollar sign!
I can't even read my own code anymore...2 -
Ok,
So when at work I love working from Jira/TFS and having little interaction when i'm battling through Code/Documentation
But Next time my manager strolls over to my desk and kicks my chair i'm Gona King Leonidas his ass out the 3rd floor window
FFS please reach out via Lync if u are planning to come up and annoy my tits!!!!!! -
first of all sorry for my english, its not my first language
hello, i am an aspiring programmer and im honestly just a really big newbie, im learning vb dot net and ran into an issue that i had. So basically i was using the WinActivate function from autoit with FindWindow(using the title of the window) to supply WinActivate the hwnd. Heres my issue: When the window is NOT minimized so selected or behind other windows the WinActivate function works completely fine, but when the window is minimized it doesnt work, i have read on the documentation that neither function cares wether the window is minimized or not so i came to the conclusion that it might have a different title when minimized? The window is the league of legends client by the way. What can i do to solve/debug this issue, perhaps spy++ could help me? how would i use this, i could upload the visual studio project if someone wants to help me out in that way. WinActivate((FindWindow(Nothing, "League of Legends"))) this is what it looks like.12 -
"The window screen is the Earth's boundary", said a flat earther using Google Maps.
By the way, they don't zoom it out that much.1 -
So turns out my manager wants me to do QA automation (not in Espresso btw) of my own items "because we're all in the same team". The weirdest thing is that she's obsessed with "best practices" about daily iteration work such as not starting to work on something until test planning is done (she gets CRAYZEEE about that). Violating one of the core development principles is out the window so I guess the question is am I in a good place to ask for a raise since I'm going to have dual roles?2
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I hate using fpdf and mpdf.
I'm sure the people working on them are great, pretty sure they have helped a lot of people, me included.
But boy do I hate not being able to write my html in peace only to find out the style I want to apply isn't supported within a table
It's making me want to jump out the window.
Anyway, I hope you whoever is reading this had a nice day, and if you didn't, you will tomorrow, you got this!1 -
I'm just about throwing my new Dell laptop (Precision 5520) out of the window!
When I disconnect laptop from the thunderbolt dock (TB16), the laptop screen stays off until it's connected back to the dock. No matter if I put the laptop to sleep before disconnecting. Everything works just fine if I shutdown the machine and restart it without connecting to dock.
The best part is that the computer seems to be running normally, the screen is just black.
Anyone got a solution in mind? I'm running Windows 10 and I have installed all the possible updates.1 -
No matter how hard I try within a certain time window only certain options are available and unless I practically kill myself
Its difficult to push hard and far enough to get blessedly out of sync with the slave machine -
Useless macos and app window selection
cmd + ` changes window in webstorm (clever them)
go to other app like chrome, cmd + ` does sfa
go to mac app settings and make cmd + ` work for all apps,
now go to webstorm and cmd + ` takes you out of webstorm if other apps open
i hate it -
I may have inadvertently gotten my old university's Comp Sci System Services addicted to CTF wargames. oops.
I also just found out that you can prevent a more command from automatically exiting on completion only by limiting the size of the window of your terminal. I lost a good 4 hours of trying literally every ssh command combination I could, when all I had to do was use a small terminal screen. Whoever designed this last challenge should be given an award and then shot.3