It changed my life, really. 😁

I sent this email to client:

Hi Christine,
Can we shit this afternoon and go over the scope of work once again?

In reply she sent me this meme with few LOL emoji

Receives email from warranty guy in work.

Warranty: "Hi, see attached scan in PDF form.
I normally fill the boxes in manually, scan as pdf to myself and then email it on to the higher ups, but they now say they need it in excel form from now on! Can you convert it for me?"

Me: "It looks like your scan's quality isn't good enough for a convert to excel.
Where do you get the original form?
Is it from a website?"

Warranty: "Hang on and ill send you an email with the file and give you a call"

*receives email and a phone call"

Warranty:
"There you go. Theres an excel sheet in that email. what do i do?"

Me: "So.... just so I understand the question... you just fill in this excel sheet, scan as pdf and send it on... but they want it sent as an excel form and not a pdf?"

"Yes."

"So.... Could you not just fill in the excel sheet and email it to them?"

"What do you mean?"

"....fill in the excel sheet as normal, and go to file, share and email... send the original one on."

"And what would that do?"

"...you... you'd be sending the form as an excel sheet, as requested??"

Warranty: *silence for 10 seconds* Oh, i see now. I get you! You're a genius! Well done for figuring it out. Thanks a million!!"

O.O

Client: Urgent! App is crashing!
Me inside: Wtf, Crashlytics didn’t send me anything, it betrayed me...
Me: What’s wrong?
Client: Some random user sent me email that app is crashing SOMEWHERE(!?)
Me: ................................... no problem, I’m working on it.

*Tomorrow*
Me: Fixed, everything works fine now (didn’t do anything actually)
Client: Great, nice work!

Client never mentioned that “problem “ anymore.
#likeaboss

So everyone is sharing their work again, so here is mine.
And no 6 monitors, 1 pc isn't overkill.

Well...

Maybe...

But just a little!

Usually, one is spotify, one iChrome, one development (center bottom), one execution of dev, one email&facebook split and one documentation.

Conversation with my mom the other day:

Mom - How do you use the screenshot button on the keyboard? (She has a Windows work laptop)

Me - Just press it.

Mom - I did that! It didn't do anything.

Me - Lol it's not supposed to do anything. It takes a picture of whatever is on your screen and you have to paste it somewhere like Paint to save the image.

Mom - Ohhh that's too much work. I use Snippit (or whatever the built in Windows screenshot app is called) and send it to myself in an email.
-------------------------
She takes a screenshot, pastes it in an email, and sends it to herself to save it. Hm.

Then she told me tonight that she needed to screenshot these questions in a quiz she was taking. I kid you not - she took a screenshot of 2 questions at a time, pasted them in an email that she sent to herself, and then printed the email. She did this for 40 questions so she printed out 20 emails with screenshots of quiz questions. She also printed out the 200 page manual she needs to study and deleted the pdf. Mom, seriously? What if you need to find something in that 200 page manual? It's so much easier to ctrl + F to find a specific word or phrase. Ohh it doesn't matter she says, there's an index.

Client: so how could we test this 😬
Me: you know what, send me an email at linuxxx@companyname.com and I can look if I can properly reply! Keep in mind though that this is for one time only, no further questions through that email address!
Client: Yes of course! *sends email*
Me: *tests* - *works fine* - *messages client back through the ticket system*
Client: *proceeds to send two follow up questions to my fucking work email address*

Me: *selects emails* - *marks emails as spam and deletes them*

Fucking seriously?! Cunt.

So, I’m a software engineer at one of the FANG companies, and a “friend” from college that I haven’t talked to in years suddenly messages me, asking for my work email. I’m like, why would you ever need that? And he replies, “I’m gonna send you an email with a link, can you open it from your work computer? I’ll pay you for doing that, and it’s totally legal.”

Yeah... how about fuck no.

He blocked me after I refused.

Start my new job next week, and just got an email from them asking if I prefer Windows 7 or Ubuntu for my work machine!

I think I'll like it there

// sorry, again a story not a rant
Category->type = 'Story';
Category->save();

Today at work I got a strange email

'about your msi laptop'

(Some background information, a few months ago I went on vacation and left my work laptop at home. Long story short some one broke in and stole my msi laptop)

So this email had my interest. I opened it and the content was something like:

Hi! My name is x, I clean/repair laptops partime and I noticed your personal information on this laptop, normally people whipe their data from their laptop before selling so this is just a double check, if the laptop was stolen please call me on xxx

If I hear nothing I'll assume its alright and will whipe your data

So of course I immediately called him, after a conversation I informed the police who is now working on the case

I may have received the best email ever all these years (and a year as a Lead).

A client acted as a boss telling me to "work this weekend to finish the project a little earlier"

Enjoying my cereal so far..

A contractor at my old job was doing a development role and was constantly annoyed and the idiotic design decisions going into the website backend we were developing 🙄😒

When he decided enough was enough he could have easily written a really snarky email but instead he wrote the most sincere and professional email to his boss and the director thanking them profusely for the opportunity and hopes he would be welcome for future work with the business....👍

He was a really good Dev and the email made the bosses super happy thanking him so much and how much of a shame it was he was going....😍

He bcc'd me on the mail and when he handed his computer in he told me to open the email and highlight in full....👌

At the end of every line in white text was 'Go Fuck yourself' or 'Zero fucks given'

The bosses never realised... And I know he's been back there about 4 months now..... But shhh 😭

My LinkedIn profile bio:

... however I’m not interested in hybrid mobile or contract work.

My LinkedIn “notes to recruiters”:

... I’m not interested in hybrid mobile or contract work.

My preferences:

- ticked full time permanent
- listed native technologies in the tag selector.

Email this morning:

Hi are you interested in the below role:

Role: Hybrid mobile developer
Salary: xxxxx
Type: 6 - 12 month contract.

No I am not you fucking fucktard. Read my fucking profile or go fuck yourself with a fucking cactus!

Client sends an email after 5 PM. We all left for home.

Client: blah blah blah...We urgently need this app to be done by COB on Monday. Our CEO is going to launching it on Tuesday to the board of Directors.

––Boss forwards me the email––

Boss: Can you get this done by this weekend.

––On Viber––
Boss: I have sent you an urgent email. Let me know.

––My Reply––
Me: This can't be done in a day or 2. Looking at the scope of work, I need at least 8 weeks.

––Boss Replies back––
Boss: You are not performing at the best of your ability. Come and see me on Monday, I need to talk to you about your performance on urgent projects.

Dear outsourced developers. Don't send me your private SSH key by email. I don't need it, it allows me to access anything else you can access pretending I'm you, and it shows a misunderstanding of how SSH keys work. 🤦🏻‍♂️

How i got to devRant.

Boss comes in, sees me super chill.
Other people enter, boss sees me not chill.

Sends me an email and says "Enjoy".

I love this guy :')

Ps. Hope he doesn't expect work today

Contrary to most people I really love to receive email related to jobs when I'm in holiday. I keep important alerts on.

It's like:
email: ***urgent, server down***
me (sipping mojito by the pool): fuck them. let's them deal with that
email: ***requirements all wrong, must develop the feature again***
me (enjoying a dinner): oh, I told them 100 times!, fuck all of them, work for me now, stupid moron.
email: I destroyed by mistake the db with an update..."
me (dancing like crazy): ahahaha I told you that support guys should not have access to production db, fuckfuck you, fix it yourself!!!

and so on..... I don't know, it just boost my pleasure during holiday.

Getting an email from friends at work after i am about to leave for a new job. Developers showing love

Me: Alright today I'm going to work on X, Y, and Z because that's what we planned yesterday.

(10 Minutes into the day)

Boss: We need you to work on A, B, and C. These need to be done today.

Me: What about X, Y, and Z?

B: You have new priorities.

(30 Minutes later)

B: What's your status on X, Y and Z? You think it'll be done today?

M: (Forwards email about new priorities)

B: I'm coming down to talk with you.

WHY.

Hubby and I work for the same company. His boss is a twat who's always trying to fire him. Told my hubby's boss he needed to be more clear with expectations and bring issues up before he gets pissed and can't respond appropriately. Then I walk away. Then I email him apologizing for taking to him and that I'm not planning to talk to him again.

That little bitch went to HR and said he felt threatened by me, demanded that I be required to work from home. My boss said no.

Aaaaaaahahahahahahahahahha 😂

Gets email from work

"New password policy introduced from next month

Passwords will have to include:
- a capital
- a lower case
- a number
- a symbol
- be at least 8 characters

Passwords will be be changed every 60 days with a new password not previously used"

Everyone starts moaning, there I am laughing as I'm in Linux and off their domain controller, and my windows laptop is a BYOD laptop and they don't want it on the domain :D

I'm trying to sign up for insurance benefits at work.

Step 1: Trying to find the website link -- it's non-existent. I don't know where I found it, but I saved it in keepassxc so I wouldn't have to search again. Time wasted: 30 minutes.

Step 2: Trying to log in. Ostensibly, this uses my work account. It does not. Time wasted: 10 minutes.

Step 3: Creating an account. Username and Password requirements are stupid, and the page doesn't show all of them. The username must be /[A-Za-z0-9]{8,60}/. The maximum password length is VARCHAR(20), and must include upper/lower case, number, special symbol, etc. and cannot include "password", repeated charcters, your username, etc. There is also a (required!) hint with /[A-Za-z0-9 ]{8,60}/ validation. Want to type a sentence? better not use any punctuation!

I find it hilarious that both my username and password hint can be three times longer than my actual password -- and can contain the password. Such brilliant security.

My typical username is less than 8 characters. All of my typical password formats are >25 characters. Trying to figure out memorable credentials and figuring out the hidden complexity/validation requirements for all of these and the hint... Time wasted: 30 minutes.

Step 4: Post-login. The website, post-login, does not work in firefox. I assumed it was one of my many ad/tracker/header/etc. blockers, and systematically disabled every one of them. After enabling ad and tracker networks, more and more of the site loaded, but it always failed. After disabling bloody everything, the site still refused to work. Why? It was fetching deeply-nested markup, plus styling and javascript, encoded in xml, via api. And that xml wasn't valid xml (missing root element). The failure wasn't due to blocking a vitally-important ad or tracker (as apparently they're all vital and the site chain-loads them off one another before loading content), it's due to shoddy development and lack of testing. Matches the rest of the site perfectly. Anyway, I eventually managed to get the site to load in Safari, of all browsers, on a different computer. Time wasted: 40 minutes.

Step 5: Contact info. After getting the site to work, I clicked the [Enroll] button. "Please allow about 10 minutes to enroll," it says. I'm up to an hour and 50 minutes by now. The first thing it asks for is contact info, such as email, phone, address, etc. It gives me a warning next to phone, saying I'm not set up for notifications yet. I think that's great. I select "change" next to the email, and try to give it my work email. There are two "preferred" radio buttons, one next to "Work email," one next to "Personal email" -- but there is only one textbox. Fine, I select the "Work" preferred button, sign up for a faux-personal tutanota email for work, and type it in. The site complains that I selected "Work" but only entered a personal email. Seriously serious. Out of curiosity, I select the "change" next to the phone number, and see that it gives me four options (home, work, cell, personal?), but only one set of inputs -- next to personal. Yep. That's amazing. Time spent: 10 minutes.

Step 6: Ranting. I started going through the benefits, realized it would take an hour+ to add dependents, research the various options, pick which benefits I want, etc. I'm already up to two hours by now, so instead I decided to stop and rant about how ridiculous this entire thing is. While typing this up, the site (unsurprisingly) automatically logged me out. Fine, I'll just log in again... and get an error saying my credentials are invalid. Okay... I very carefully type them in again. error: invalid credentials. sajfkasdjf.

Step 7 is going to be: Try to figure out how to log in again. Ugh.

"Please allow about 10 minutes" it said. Where's that facepalm emoji?

But like, seriously. How does someone even build a website THIS bad?

Enough is enough!!!
I just received an email from HR because "Your not supposed to work that much as a trainee! Your should study at home"

WELL THANK YOU, BUT DID IT EVER COME TO YOUR MIND THAT I MIGHT ACTUALLY BE WORKING?!

I just wrote back that I have tons of stuff to do, and that they can talk to my boss if they want me to work less.

So to sum up:
I solve problems and get screamed at by HR in return?
IT FUCKING GREAT

Ok I have 2 more hours to work today. I bet I will get these 3 important things done.

*important email comes in*
*laptop runs out of batery*
*client finally calls back after 4 weeks*
*data structure has to be reorganized urgently due to new requirements*

After dealing with all of that, I close all windows in order to go home. The last window is the thing I wanted to do in the first place.

Today someone called about issues with setting up email (they were hosting where I work) locally.

Fellow support guy spend half a FUCKING hour trying to explain it.

Throughout that half our, our activities existed of making gun-to-head gestures, sending meme faces back and forth (derps, fuckthisshitimout's, trololol's and so on).

It was hard to contain our laughter but damn he needed that badly 😆

Client (not for the first time): Your work sucks. I had to have this email formatting re-done before I sent it out.

Me: *sees that the email sent matches the work I did exactly with no changes*

Client (months later): I need you to do maintenance on my website.

Me: *does quick maintenance for free but sends update on status of work done and amount left in retainer agreement*

Client: You're too expensive! You started working with me for $X/hr, then you went up to $Y/hr and now you're all the way up to $Z/hr! You're not worth that!

Me: *fires client by refunding the remainder of retainer and sends client a list of local, cheaper providers*

Client: But now I don't have anyone to maintain my website until I find a new provider! Why have you done this to me? Waaaahhhhh!

Me (in the most professional language I can muster): Because you're a biotch and I'm tired of your verbal abuse. Maybe try not to be such a dbag to that next provider, mmm'kay?

I haven't checked my work email in a month or two.
We use slack, so every time someone needs me they just message me there or text me. It works nicely. I also dislike email in general.

Anyway: I looked at my inbox this morning, and again just now. I've gotten just over 900 emails today.

Why?
Tons of useless alerts on a shoddy as hell codebase. As an example: Every time a coworker uses a tool or lookup with a sub-par query, it ties up the single shared database long enough to generate response time alerts.
As a better example, there are many many many informational alerts that intentionally begin with "500 Internal" specifically to trigger an email alert. Why? I guess they were useful at some point?

There's just so much to fix...
And I guess I don't care enough.

On the bright side: this gives me a great reason to ignore my email!

Manager: I NEVER SAID THAT!!

Dev: *Brings up email where he said exactly that*

Manager: I DON’T REMEMBER ASSIGNING YOU A TICKET TO LOOK THAT UP. GET BACK TO WORK!!

Dev: …

Last day of vacation, decided to check my work email.... The list of things they've broken is.... terrifying, I don't want to go back... ever...

New French Law Makes It Illegal To Email Employees After Work Hours

I shall refer to the client as cunt for the purposes of this rant. All design work signed off. Near completion of project, cunt sends an email moving stuff around and changing the design. I send the cunt an email telling him that I will review his requests and send a quote through detailing cost implications and extra time added to his deadline to complete. Cunt says he wasn't aware there would be extra costs. I refer the cunt back to the quote and contract which clearly distinguishes the design phase and build phase explaining change control. Not heard back from said cunt.

We received an urgent email from a client this morning that needed addressed immediately. We knew it was not going to be easy or fun so we did the sensible thing and began a rock paper scissors tournament to see who would work on it.

I lost... But then we see a follow up email from my boss saying he is handling it. Win!

Fast forward 6 hours, he comes out of his office and hands me a piece of paper and says he is too busy to work on it so I need to do it before going home. The paper is the email from 8am this morning... He did absolutely nothing with it for six hours except print it because a digital copy isn't good enough I guess.

I ended up working late, got yelled at by said client, and still haven't finished the fixes.

Worst of all is that I missed part of shark week because I stayed late.

So, the job I refer to as Hell finally deleted my work email account yesterday.

I've been getting (and ignoring) emails on that account for years now. Probably still have production access and push rights, too. 🙄

after spending a day figuring out why my code does not work, i finally realized someone broke master

then i found myself in the following conversation

jim : "yeah, we found out about it yesterday, i am working on a fix right now"

me : "so why did you not send and email to everyone that master is broken, don't pull changes"?

jim : "hey... someone told me to fix it, so that's what i am doing. that doesn't include sending an email. if you want to, you can send it.. "

Storytime!

>purchased Sublime Text a few years ago
>used it a bit, mostly on Ubuntu, but eventually fell away
>mostly because notepad++ or just not coding
2017.apng
A wild DevRant has appeared!
>see people using Sublime Text
>remember the good old days(tm)
>download Sublime Text
>search email for key
missing-key.html
>work up courage to send email to Sublime Text team
theyRespond.jar
>turns out I was looking in the wrong email address
>still sent me my old key to the email address I sent the email from
i-am-ok-with-this.svg

10/10 would purchase Sublime Text code again

FUCK CORPORATE EMAIL SPAM

AND I DON'T MEAN SOME SOME EXTERNAL SCAM/AD/PISHING EMAILS

I MEAN THE SHIT MY OWN COMPANY SENDS TO ME

LIKE:

"tHE WelLbeIng Course : SiGN In now!!!!!"

"#MoRnIngcOfFEE witH SOME cORporatE TWAt"

"Give togetHER : LETs circLE JerK OurSeLveS in SOMe fuCKiNg oNLiNe mEetInG !!!!!!!"

I DON'T FUCKING CARE !

I GET DOZENS (IF NOT FUCKING HUNDREDS) OF SUCH SHIT EMAILS EVERY DAY.

IF I GO ON VACATION, I HAVE TO SPEND HOURS TO SORT SHIT OUT

I HAVE HAD TO SET UP ELABORATE OUTLOOK RULES TO GET IT SORTED AUTOMATICALLY INTO SOME MANAGEABLE FOLDERS (AND SPEND SOME OF MY LIMITED TIME, HERE ON EARTH, TO DO SO)

AND GUESS WHAT

THANKS TO THOSE STUPID RULES I MISSED, ONE FUCKING IMPORTANT EMAIL

CAN YOU JUST STOP FUCKING SPAMMING ME ?!!!

FOR CHRIST SAKE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS STUPID CORPORATE BULLSHIT

STOP SENDING IT TO ME

Once, at my first job, the CEO of the company sent a group email in which he essentially lambasted my ability to do my job.

I wasn't even hired as a programmer, I was a data entry guy who learned how to code on the job, and at this point I was literally the only person writing code for the company. I regularly worked 12+ hours every day, and even though I had to learn practically everything on my own I was still getting things done -- at least, I would have gotten things done if the CEO didn't keep pulling me off of my projects to work on whatever his latest ultra-important-idea-of-the-week was. I was even working for an 8 hr/day, 5 day/week salary, putting in extra hours for free.

But no, my sacrifices and hard work weren't good enough in the CEO's eyes, and he chose to say that to multiple people in an email, including investors in our startup. I don't remember exactly what was said, but whatever it was made me so livid I couldn't do any work; every time I sat down to code, I thought about that email and it so infuriated me that I couldn't concentrate. It took me twelve hours just to calm down enough to get back to coding.

After that, I refused to communicate with the CEO except through my boss, the CTO.

At a game dev class. Class starts and everyone is already doing something and I don't know what. I hear the some guy telling us about what to do with those "assets he sent us". Apparently everyone got a mail with the assets we'll be using and an instruction video for the day. Everyone but me, that is. I call the guy over and I tell him I didn't get the email. "Well why didn't you get the email?" HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW? You didn't tell us we'd be getting one so I couldn't exactly tell you to resend it. So now I'm just sitting here watching the rest of them work awkwardly...(first rant btw)

Working on a project where the coordinator is insisting on using OneDrive. Lost the link he sent out in an email so decided to:

- Google "OneDrive": Eventually brought me to "office.live.com/...." with a view of my settings and apps ... no OneDrive.

- Spent a while using a bit of logic to click around and find it, forgot logic doesn't work well with MS products and ended up on Outlook instead.

- Spent a while searching for the original email with the link, found it, brings me to "...sharepoint.com/....".

- Inside sharepoint (OneDrive?) the banner says "Office 365".

- But the browser tab says OneDrive.

Are Microsoft just afraid of consistency at this point? I mean seriously, pick a name and use it everywhere. Why is that so hard? why is that so complicated?

Legacy code.

Honestly though, this is some of the better legacy code I've worked with at this company. It's a nifty alert system wherein you can trigger sending messages to subscribers of that alert via whatever means (phone/email) they've entered.

I'll save you the technical analysis of its internals, but suffice to say it's actually pretty nice, with good separation of concerns, internal logic hidden away, dead-simple public interface, etc. documentation is kinda crap, but it exists (!), so that's a nice change.

but.

For some unknown and bloody bizarre reason, the thing breaks when a user wants both sms AND email notifications. Either by themselves work totally fine, but both together? nonono. Email alerts give ArgumentErrors, so something internal isn't correct, and SMS alerts complain about uninitialized Twilio::Error constants.

but.
they both work fine otherwise?

also, the two notification preferences aren't stored on the same object anywhere. if a user wants both, the user creates two AlertContact objects with different info, and when performed, the Alert basically iterates over these and does its thing for each, so there is no knowledge shared between them. totally should work the same regardless.

idfgi.

ALSO.
AND THIS PART REALLY PISSES ME OFF.

WHEN THERE'S AN ERROR, THIS THING DOESN'T LOG IT. IT STRINGIFIES THE ERROR OBJECT (basically just extracting the message) AND INSERTS THAT INTO THE DATABASE INSTEAD. WHAT THE CRAP.

So, I don't get a stack trace, line number, or anything. just the basic error message. instead of my alert text. because of course that makes sense and totally helps debugging.

aklsjfak;sldfj.
legacy code.

Sometimes I wonder how compromised my parents online security would be without my intervention.

My mom logged into her gmail and there was an red bar on top informing about Google preventing an attempted login from an unknown device.

Like typical parents / old people, that red bar didn't caught her attention but I noticed it immediately. I took over and looked into it. It showed an IP address and a location that was quite odd.

I went ahead with the Account security review and I was shocked to find that she had set her work email address as the recovery email!!

I explained her that work email accounts cannot be trusted and IT department of the workplace can easily snoop emails and other info on that email address and should not be related to personal accounts.

After fixing that issue, me being a typical skeptic and curious guy, I decided to find more info about that IP address.

I looked up the IP address on a lookup website and it showed an ISP that was related to the corporate office of her workplace. I noticed the location Google reported also matched with the corporate office location of her work.

Prior to this event, few days ago, I had made her change her gmail account password to a more secure one. ( Her previous password was her name followed by birth date!! ). This must have sent a notification to the recovery mail address.

All these events are connected. It is very obvious that someone at corporate office goes through employees email addresses and maybe even abuse those information.

My initial skeptism of someone snooping throguh work email addresses was right.

You're welcome mom!

Trying to setup server monitoring for one server (will deploy it on all my servers once this works well).

Getting these email notifs to work is a bitch 😅

(can't do pushover etc since those require GCM and I've got Google blocked out of my phone)

I used to work in a tech shop. Old lady brings her laptop in claiming viruses broke her Gmail. I do the diagnostic, it's relatively clean with a bit of browser adware and tracking cookies. I call her and let her know there was nothing wrong with her Gmail and that it's good to go (she approved a tune up). She comes in and gets it. She calls later saying Gmail is still broken. I invite her to bring it in so we can have a look together (knowing for sure she was the problem). So we open up Gmail together and she shows me what she's doing. She's clicking on the sender and getting the contact card instead of the email opening. I show her how to actually open the email. She doesn't understand. I spend twenty more minutes explaining how to open an email. And this is the wk13 kicker, she waits until after twenty minutes to ask what "click" means. I was so done. That lady was too old to be using a computer.

I just sent an email to a client about a bug fix with Bootstrap 3 Date/Time Picker, which was not working with Firefox and Safari.
My email was like this "The bug has been fixed and it will work on most browsers except IE and Edge."
He replied "Great!! I don’t like internet explorer anyway…"

I love these kinds of clients.

A nice holiday just can't be complete without an email like this.

When you work remotely and communication from your boss or coworkers sucks and you're paranoid that they think you arent doing anything since they dont check in with you.

I think I'm getting let go. Got an email saying to stop all the work on a project I was working on and to come in for a meeting with my manager tomorrow.

Fuck.

To those wondering what's it like to work in corporates and "HOW slow is it, really...?".

My corp project contract ended 1.5 months ago.
Today I got an email saying my access request has been finally approved and implemented.

I work for healthcare client project in a start up, worked two years straight without a break.

Client is very inconsiderate about developers work-life balance, he always wants to release every features yesterday.

Never had a reasonable deadline, worked late nights most of the time. No one had backbone to control this client from our side.

Its only developers team, no project management, scrum masters or anything, everything has to be taken care by Dev's.

I decided to take a week break from work.

The first day of my leave he pinged me 3 times to change an "from email" address for notification email which no one give a damn about.

I never replied or did anything. But the part of myself is dying of guilt.

Now I can't relax myself completely.

Re-thinking of my life choices atm.

I loved programming since high school, I can work on computers 24/7 without tired. That's how much I love it. Now I'm just tired of it.

If anyone who read this till here. Thank you.

This fucking idiot at work needs to use the pre release version of the iOS app for a training programme, and I swear I have tried my best to best to help him get the app on his phone.

I use Fabric and I chose because of how easy it is to install on a persons phone, but this is the situation so far. Also he lives a couple cities away so I can't do it myself.

I had to waste time waiting for him to call me, beforehand I sent the email, maybe 5 minutes before his call and told him that he needs to find the email, he says oh okay alright well I'll contact you if I have any problems.

I waited a day and sent a follow-up email on what the subject, from email, and even what the email looks like with screenshots.

No response for 3 weeks, and I bring it up in a meeting that I need to help him again.

So it's a literal fucking repeat of the first step, wait for his call, this time close to the end of my work day and he's 30 minutes late for his own fucking schedule, I thought whatever so I say the exact same thing BUT expecting him to get it out of the way while I'm on the phone...

Waited two days and sent him an email today and since I forgot to mention it, I've told him that this is to REGISTER to get the app. Guess what his reply was.

Sorry I can't get it on my phone!

He can't get what a fucking email to open on his phone and follow instructions a small bipedal animal could figure out?

It's literally follow the fucking icon moving they have gifs showing exactly what to click...

So tomorrow I have to somehow not blow up and get this app on his phone, honestly I understand some people can have issues with technical things but I got a guy at work that has trouble with his computer all the time to follow my same instructions without me needing to say more than I'll send an email all you need to do is follow the instructions, he actually enjoyed going through it.

...I swear this guy is just not even bothering, and I made sure I sent it to the right email, also second call he told me he found the email..

Got this email from my manager today... a bit of a downer to my three day weekend!

I actually don't talk about work (in an indentifiable way), and I think most of the other points in their guide are utter BS (and unenforceable).

I am pretty open (about myself) on social media though, so feel sorry for HR if they've been combing through it! 🤣

I got laid off.

19/08/2022 - I received an email at 3pm advising me that I'm part of a group of 100 employees who are being let go. All the accounts were deactivated except Slack so we can say final good-bye to our team.

The decision was made based on "Last in, first out". It sucks because I loved the work and team plus work from home.

!dev

Why are people such idiots?
This guy is so oblivious he reminds me of a client or PM.

Here’s the email conversation (since he refuses to answer his cell):

Me: Hey; I haven’t been able to reach you for several days. You must be busy! Let me know what time works best for you, and I’ll call you then. Alternatively, you can reach me at <number> any day this week (except Wednesday) from 11am PST (2pm EST) onward.

Him: I will call you at 2:30pm your time on Wednesday.

Me: As I stated in my email, Wednesday is the only day that doesn’t work for me.

Him: Are you free on Thursday?

Me (to audience): YOU FOOLISH, ILLITERATE TOAD!

Me: I am free Thursday (and Friday) from 11am PST and onward.

After months of hard work, we finally released our product. Only for the PM to send this out as the announcement​ email..

My company has sort of project team ("FachArbeitsGruppe" in German) meetings regularly and we love our abbreviations so every now and then at work I see an email or document just labeled "FAG". I think there's even a users group called "FAG IT".

Being asked (or more accurately made!) to travel Mon-Fri (i.e. staying away from home) for at least 2 months to a customer's site to work on a completely insane project that had no design, formal requirements, preparation or support. It was just a "friendly side project" 2 friendly managers concocted.

After some research, the project wasn't actually technically possible, but the customer wanted it so I had to try to find a solution.

The complication for me was that my wife was almost 8 months pregnant with our first kid and I made it clear I really wanted to be at home. Was left to feel I had little choice but to go. Project runs over but damnit I'm taking my 3 weeks parental leave entitlement.

Day before I'm due to go back to work, I get an email saying "You'll be travelling tomorrow for the next few weeks". At that point, I replied with the most angry work email I've ever sent and threatened that if that was the case I wouldn't be back. Plans were changed.

I ended up leaving within a couple of months anyway.

Why are clients so ignorant and stupid?!

Send them the software with specific instructions WHERE to install it. Location is important as it is a plugin for AutoCAD.

First mail with complains about the plugin doesn't work. Find out (in the mail they sent internal) that they installed the plugin somewhere else than I instructed them.

Sent an email back with (again) an explanation why it doesn't work and where to install the plugin.

Email from client: So I put the plugin here [incomplete and invalid location] and create the last folder myself...

FOR FUCK SAKE SRUPID ASS IGNORANT DOWN SYNDROM (sorry folks) MOFO CLIENT!!!!
I SENT YOU UP TO 3 TIMES WHERE TO PUT THE GODDAMNED PLUGIN!

So my client wants to stick with their current hosting provider (Bell) because the company is "big" and "won't go anywhere anytime soon." I just said, well okay it can't be that bad. Bell charges about 10x more and gives you about 10x less compared to other options, but it's not my money so whatever. Well, Bell has the absolute worst customer service. They have an online support form where I can type in my questions and they will call me within a day to help me. They called me during work hours and I missed the call, so they sent me an email to let me know I missed the call and gave me a number to call. I called and I might as well have called my dog because the support didn't even know what a .htaccess file is. I emailed them back and asked if they could forward my email to someone in the hosting department that could help (because the phone support I got was shit). I got a reply saying they "can't"... yup, they used the word "can't", they can't forward the email and that I would have to call. Is everyone at Bell a fucking dick chugging brainless pile of moldy-ass shit biscuits!? YOU CAN"T SEND AN EMAIL? Turns out they do have a dedicated hosting support email, let's hope the email I send ends up in front of someone at Bell who at least has a slight clue how to use a keyboard.

I was sending an email ranting about how bad work was and then I hit reply all FML

Client sends multiple emails claiming that Im delaying n work and that he has a deadline. (In 4 hours)

I checked his revised briefing and started work in hopes of finishing it under my own deadline of 3 hours.

Received another email from my client telling me that the briefing is incomplete and that he will send me the final briefing tonight -_-

What the fuck man?

[Developed a script that will trigger beeping sound on any laptop activity like a Skype message or incoming email]

Work for home Routine:

9:00 AM: Wake up, turn on Laptop, connect to Internet, Sleep again.

Oh dear, I'd better hurry and click that big red convenient button! After all, it's an account registered using my work email. I can't let it expire!

Pattern I'm noticing...

*email* Hey, can you help me with my code, I don't know why it's not working...*end email*

no comments. if you wrote the shit and don't know what the blazes it's doing, how am i supposed to know what you broke? I'm not a mind reader, I don't know what you were thinking when you wrote the code.

true, I could go through and read it and try to figure it out, but then i'll be cranky and much less likely to want to help you in the future because you're causing unnecessary work, and part of my job is to get you ready for work environments, and I WILL DO EVERYTHING IN MY FUCKING POWER TO MAKE YOU THE ONE PERSON THAT EVERYONE DOESN'T HATE, BUT I WILL HATE YOU FOREVER BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSING ME THE HELL OFF.

So I just receieved a rude email from my client as candidates cannot register on his system. He is adamant that the system I built doesn't work........until he found out that candidates are silly and not reading notifications written in h1 with a font size of 33px that states "Please check your email to activate your account".......

FUCK SAKE READ PEOPLE.... READ!

So, my officemate was inquiring about a job posting using her work email. She asked me if I'm interested and forwarded the email to me. Only to realize afterwards that she had it sent to the wrong email address. Take note, she's also sending it to my company email. Since the email she put on it doesn't match any addresses on our domain, it was sent to our CEO (the admin of the company domain) which in turn, forwarded it to me. I can't imagine the look on the CEO's face when he saw the job invitation email.

To all the web developers out there that use email validation, stop using a check for common domain names! If I try to sign up with my email address (something@coded-websites.be) it won't work! So stop doing that and use a RegEx please! Who has had this problem too?

Worst: I lost development contract - probably due to covid - after 4 years of work. I got email when I was at bank seconds before signing mortgage for my first apartment.
I signed it anyways as a technically unemployed person without income looking at the world collapsing.

Best: I gained new contract with 40% money raise. Fuck yeah !

It's about a guy that knows better.

I was working as a subcontractor on a bigger system. We (subs) were not allowed to deploy code, we had to wait for contractor to deploy.

One day I got an email that my code is bugged and that my feature is not working on production. I checked it on test env, everything was fine. Then I checked if the code I wrote was deployed. It was not.

I send an email explaining that if they deployed my code it would be working. Then I got a response. There was a bug in my code.

Another email. I asked how would they know? Do they have a test on their environment that failed?

No. There is one guy that READ my code and he said it should not work, so he will not deploy it. He was not a programmer, he was a business consultant responsible for the documentation.

His issue was that I used a function that was not in a class. So if the function is not declared it's obvious it will not work. I had to explain to him in another email, that you can use object of another class inside your class and then call a function, that is not in your class. It was the last time this guy blocked my deploy.

TL;DR, I had to explain a non-dev how object composition works in order to have my code deployed. Took four emails.

The other month i went into work, excited to actually get something done. On top of that it was yearly bonus day. Quick check on adp to see the bonus and nothing there. Email my boss and ask whats up. Ten minutes later i am unemployed after two years because of a cultural fit. No warnings, nothing bd said about my work, made all the deadlines. Guess they didnt want to say budget cut. Haven't replaced me yet.

Throughout my career I've blocked a total of three toxic clients.

They still find me via email.

Most recently, I've gotten an email simply asking "how does BitBucket work and how can I use it?"

LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!

Tip: Find the email of a github user.
Github user page > choose a repository > view code > click commits > click on a commit > add .patch at the end of the url.
This shows email adres of github user who did the commit.
Note: does not work with forked repo’s.

Source : Twitter

FFFFFFUUUUUUCCCCKKKKK spent 1hr writing a Quora answer to "Why did Warren Buffet buy Apple not Google" on my phone. Then forgot to copy the text before submitting and lo hand behold...

Submission Failed....

Ok just for kicks:

-lock in effect
-Apple has a monopoly on i*
-90% of people just need their apps to work and check email, they don't give a fuck about alternative options

Seven hours of meetings this week, and every. single. one. of them could have been an email.

How can they expect me to get anything done when all I’m doing is listening to them drone on and on and …

And of course this shouldn’t affect the deadlines. No siree! But can I work during them? Not a chance! … Totally do anyway …

Client tests app 100000 times, app works fine
Client tests app once, app doesn't work
Client sends email to everyone,
"Hey, @CodesNotHot, this app is not working at all! Can you please look at it right now!! This is URGENT!"
I test the app, it's working fine.

I just want to high five someone with a machete on the face right now.

Dear client,

Every email you send me slows me down.

So that piece of work you keep bugging me about that you want done sooner and then adding other problems on top and then asking about it everyday even though we have already discussed this, it's going to be delayed,... due to your incessant emailing!

And just because you have been busy all year and finally slowing down doesn't mean I'm slowing down!

Come on holidays to no reception or internet service!

So this startup guy was supposed to call me today between 12-2pm on Skype... well he didn't, nor did he send an email... So I guess he forgot... Again...

I'm taking this as a sign he's having 2nd thoughts or that there's going to be way too much work.

Either way, feels to me I should just pass?

“Fullstack dev morphs into a security expert”

We have a simple user registration system. Get the user details, generate an OTP, save in Oracle, email the OTP. The SMTP host is configured to send emails only to people who have an existing @a_very_famous_bank.com email address.

As a part of an enhancement request, the other day, we were trying to register a non-bank email address. As expected, it failed.

Manager: Meeting... meeting... meeting

Me: (Explained the problem)

Fullstack dev: so the thing is.. it’s like.. (doesn’t falter to open with these lines)...what I can do is...I can send you an HTTP security header in the HTTP request. It’ll work!

Me: (I hope an adult giraffe fucks you in your belly button)

More to come!

my boss sent us an email saying that we have to send him a summary of our work everyday and how much time we invested on the job because sometimes we work at home and he won't know if we really worked.

--------today-------
me: *sleeps for 4 hrs*
me: *configures apache in amazon linux real quick*
me: i worked for 4 hours blah blah and i fixed the apache configurations blah and i coded in js and php for the datatables thing blah blah *sends email*
boss: nice work! have a great weekend.

now thats how you do it when u procrastinate a lot!

Fuck your clients, right...? A small town bank I’m doing some security work for; I had them create me a test account. I received an email with my password; are you fucking serious...?

End User: The program isn't working
Me: What were you trying to do?
End User: blah blah blah
Me: Are you using IE?
End User: Yes, I always use IE everything should work with it.
Me: Didn't you see the email to the listserv explicitly saying not to use IE?
End User: I did, but I only like to use IE.
Me: (bangs head against desk & loses all hope)

If you CC: me on an email I won't read it because I'm clearly not the intended recipient and I'm not going to do your work for you in trying to work out why I should give a fuck.

If you wish me to actually *give* said fuck then send me my own fucking email explaining why I should give a rat's anus about your shitty little problems.

And, if you try to use "but I copied you on the email" as an excuse for your incompetence in a meeting, I will eviscerate you on the spot. You will be looking at your small intestine while I ask your assembled co-workers if they have any other business.

CC: basically means you have no respect for my time. So, if you do it, I'm coming for you...and your family...and your friends...and all the people you know on Linked-In...

Workplace starts using slack (or other chat app);

Now you can use channels: now your inbox has inboxes and you don't know where to look.

Now channels support threads: now your inboxes have inboxes have inboxes.

1,000 books on productivity and research show how important deep work is and time boxing your email:
Now your inboxes that have inboxes thst have expect your attention every moment of the day.. And I still don't know where to look.

When your app is in internal testing and you tell them specifically "this part won't work in test" .. Then 20 minutes later you get an email about it as a bug. 😞

First few times being made to make mobile responsive emails (from scratch, not generators) was an utter psychedelic mess I never wish to have the pleasure of returning too.

I since have had the pleasure of refusing this, as being able to maintain this chaotic mess created which has to be able to work across the major email clients is just a living nightmare.

There’s hell, then there’s a whole other level.

I used to work for a company that had a main website and a lightweight app. LW app was distributed to partners and added to other sites using an iframe.

Someone decided a requirement was to retain the shopping cart for anonymous users. Some dev thought the best way to do that was to issue auth cookies to anonymous users.

The auth cookie issued by the LW app was actually for the main site. A few users for LW app decided to just come to main site to make a purchase. Since they already had an auth cookie (issued from LW app), they were never prompted to log in, create an account, or use guest checkout on the main site. They were still able to complete their order and we had their shipping address, but we didn’t have their email address so we couldn’t contact them about their order.

Customer service had no way to email customers if something went out of stock or if there was a product recall. CS would have to call these customers and ask for email addresses. Good luck getting anyone to answer or return a call nowadays. Customers were asking where their confirmation email was. The admin website was polluted with “users” that had the placeholder email for non-logged in users.

This happened because of a combination of an understaffed and overextended engineering department. Of course when something goes bad it’s going to be bad.

PM emails me a zip file with the message "Can you give the attached a look and get it to work. See email below that there are some items missing to make it run."

Items missing : 3 custom libraries, 2 sql databases, 3 custom sql tables, and oh yeah the license to the program it runs on.

My Manager: Could you help "other manager" (OM) they need some very simple code changes.

Me: sure that will only take a few minutes *adds 15 lines of code tells OM one single line they have to modify*

Some other manager (SOM): Hey how does this work, I'm confused, do I need to do anything?

Me: Yes see the email chain you were copied on.

SOM: Actually let's have a meeting instead and all discuss this.

Goddammit this was a simple change to make your life easier now you are wasting everyones time by not reading the email

is google fucking with me today?

today i was accepted for some google summer internship program thing. they send me a google form right? so i open it up in chromium and it doesn’t work. it doesn’t let me type in any textboxes or anything. i try to fix it and no luck. then, i copy the link to firefox and voilà, it works.

so, google forms didn’t work in chromium but did in firefox? alright. then i check off yes, send me a copy of my responses to my gmail account. and guess what? gmail classified that as SPAM. google email classified a google forms email as spam.

good work google, you’re fucking stupid.

Manager gave me a project he wanted to be done fast. Spoke with the guy who wanted the feature asap . After 4 days of hard work and testing sent a email to the guy who wanted the feature asap, requesting access to ftp where to periodically upload the output data. Day 3 still no answer.

Client wanted a site for the 100th anniversary of an important local musician. They wanted to show calendar of events, biography, store, and more. We started the work 8 months before the commemorative date, and after 4 months, the site was 99% complete and waiting final review and approvement. 2 weeks of silence has passed, when I got an email saying their deleted the site from server and all backups, and now they wanted all the work back.

With luck, I could restore a partial backup, and the client didn't want to pay for redo the rest of the work.

10 months later (yes, after all the events has started and the site being off) they contact me again, asking to continue the work.

I was happy to say no.

A fight story (separation of concern) : work vs life

IT Director (IT'D) forwarded a client message (false detection) to my whatsapp (personal number). I am sitting next to his cabin.

After an hour,

ITD : what was the issue with the client x?
Me : (proved false detection),
ITD : did you emailed client?

Me : no, don't send me these in WhatsApp, if any issues, email me since I won't check whatsapp and there is no guarantee that I will reply you back.

ITD : why, don't be negative. Either you have to or me have to do it.

Me : Tell them to email.
ITD : That is not right.

Me : I don't care if you provide support via WhatsApp. But I don't. Unless you provide a separate mobile and connection.

End of story.

Is asking for a nice email client in Linux too much?

In thunderbird, I found no way to customize the "messages pane". Title, sender, time all in one line.

In KMail, the fonts and style of HTML signature is not working as expected.

In Evolution, the fonts scaling doesn't work correctly.

Fuck me!

Had a recruiter say I was saying "wasting his time" by constantly declining job opportunities he sent via email (it was a mass email too). Another recruiter started questioning why I didn't work for this other company that didn't seem to have technology as a decent focus at its core. I'm honestly done with recruiters.

I interviewed for a big named company who I really admired to work on some video stuff .. My technical interview lasted 10 minutes swiftly followed by a #fail email ... Two years later I had the opportunity to interview again and got a position ! Never stop learning

I never ever give out my cell # to ppl at work. If they need to speak with me, I provide them my work # only.

Two weeks ago, went to a customer site. For ONE minute, I had an email on the screen that had my personal cell #.

Last Tuesday - out walking dog: call from customer to personal cell.

Last Thursday - getting ready for work, brushing teeth: call from customer to personal cell.

Last Friday - grabbing lunch: call from customer to personal cell.

Yesterday - in a meeting: call from customer to personal cell.

I'm gonna cry 😢

At Uni i have a course that basically teaches us how to use python for simulations. So I made all the assignments and everything worked like expected on my computer. After I got my grade back, I checked the corrected file and I saw that in an entire assignment the code did not work. 🙁 So of course I dubblechecked if the code that I wrote really didn’t work. And again the code ran fine on my pc. So I send an email to the TA with my complaint. Today he replied with an email that the code still didn’t work and that he couldn’t give me any points for it.
Next step: his office 🧐

Dear customers just fucking stop and do the following:

1. Explain yourself in complete sentences.

2. Read the email you just wrote.

3. Regardless of the content delete the email.

4. Go about your day and leave me alone.

Fucking emails like this, I can't even:

Customer Person A: Hey this thing doesn't work when I change X!

Me: Uh where did you change X? There's 3 places that can be changed.

Customer Person A: No, Customer Person B is responding to the wrong ticket.

- Customer B has never responded to the ticket and isn't on the email chain we're talking about...-

-ticket closed, communication impossible reason "Kiteo, his eyes closed"-

So we're looking for a new developer, my boss sends me an email with a subject "Intresting CV". It was for a office clerk who altered a Wordpress website for the company they use to work for

This year, Lord willing...
* get married
* take a one week honeymoon without a single frantic phone call/email/IM from work or clients. Way way harder than getting married!

So I mentioned before that I managed to beat the ATS system for one job posting and got an immediate interview invite.

They one upped me by sending me to a video interview with an AI. It's supposed to analyze my facial expressions and determine if I'm worthy of being hired.

Got a rejection email just now.

So after all that hard work, looks like Skynet didn't like me very much 😛.

Senior group project in college.

When you decide to meet up and one member doesn't show up at first meeting.

So I sent an email about the research I did on the feasibility of the project and how to implement a core requirement. 2 days later & no response yet..

Why do I think I'm gonna be the one the pull off the application by myself & then have to put name of people who have no idea how I got it to work..

Working on building responsive emailer for a client.

Client: the emailer doesn't seem to work with our email system.

Me: can we have access to your system to do some tests?

Client: No you are not trained in it.

Me: well how are we suppose to fix the problem?

Client: Just keep trying

Me: ......

For about 3x years now, we have had 3x generic work email addresses that are used as microsoft accounts for office 2016 licenses.
(The company is dragging its heels on getting office 365 so MS like to make our lives hell.)

Suddenly we can’t get office updates... and when we sign in to see why, it says that because we are apparently only 3 years old we need our parents permission to use the account or we’ll lose access by September.
Never were we forced to enter a DOB when setting the accounts up!!! So it used the account setup date instead.

It turns out that we can’t change our DOB ourselves, as we are a ‘child’ and need a parents permission.
Fine.
I access my personal account and follow the instructions to add the 3x email addresses as my children so i can change the DOB.

‘Ha ha’ i hear microsoft saying, ‘it doesn’t work that way!!’

No, In order for the parent to verify their child’s identity, they are charged 0.50c per child!
Wtf!!
Doesn’t cost a lot but come on Microsoft!!

It’s that, or submit ID, which obviously wont work for a generic support@ email address like we have.
So annoying and we don’t know what to do.
Wonder how much MS are making out of this...

Sent an email to 4 people.

Got 5 out of office auto responses. WTF.

Good thing I don't have work to do 🙃

Just because I don't have any message in my work email account doesn't mean I have to get shit talk from Microsoft (out of all the tech companies)!!!!

I've been thinking of a script that when my work colleague writes "warm regards" at the end of an important email to clients, it adds "luke" to the front of it. Thoughts?

I saw that a co-worker had left their office email open on their machine, so I typed out a huge hate mail of the upper management and then announced resignation for the poor work culture that the company provided. Then I edited the email to be a bit more nice. I added some praise about the company - about having the opportunity to work in the company and for the amazing colleagues (and mentioned my own name) in the first paragraph. To close the email, I wrote :
"PS : This is what happens if you leave your machine open for the office to do as they please"

I first sent out a copy to myself (as proof) with the cover :
" Hey, check this out, I'm sending this out to everyone@company.com in a while. I want to let you know that none of this is directed at you. You've been an amazing colleague and mentor. You've been my inspiration from the start; from the time I joined the team. I'm honoured that I got to work with you. I hope we can remain friends as we are now, meet up once in a while outside work and discuss life. "

And then I put the actual email up in the compose window with the to field addressed to everyone@company.com. I didn't hit send.

Funnily, enough, this person never found out that it was me who actually typed out the whole email for another 1.5 months. They probably looked into their Sent folder later on when they saw the email that I sent to myself. They replied to it saying :
"Thank you for not sending out that email that day. I've been very very extra careful (I didn't understand the "very, very, extra" part) since that day"
I replied that it was only to prove a point and that I thought the point was well conveyed.

I had a good laugh that day. Since then, every time we crossed paths, we had that look in our eyes that met and only the 2 of us understood.

New project arrises says teacher, my mate and I go to the meeting and it seems alright, guy says he'll pay us $1000 each.
A couple weeks later, "Sorry boys cant get that much money need to pay you $500 each".

Now we have basically finished the whole thing he sends an email and it says, "We got a great fund of $333 for both of you."

Lesson learnt never work in a community project if your looking for money.

Thank you, dear 3rd party vendor replying to my ticket to my work email and sending me my new password IN FUCKING PLAINTEXT!

Yesterday night, pushed code that work normally to prod server, website down, internal server error, too many connection to MySQL server, tried to fix it for 4 hours, nothing to do, removed the new code, still the same problem, in my head, I told myself that I'm not good at programming (not the first time), send an email to the host, they tell me the problem is from them and they fixed it. And now I know I'm not bad enough.

What's the point of a farewell email at work?

Just got another today from a random guy we don't really know with his # and personal email.

The only thing I can think of doing with it is feeding it to a spambot?

I've never coded (for work) on vacation. I just turn off my work laptop and my work phone. So I can spend the first week of back to work for going through my email & messages.

I'm not irreplaceable and I work with competent people. (At least that's my goal at work.)

My colleague sends me an email saying “here’s a check not being performed which causes a bug can you fix this and push to production”
With a screenshot of the code and place it needs to happen underlined

ARE YOU kIDDING ME OH MY GOD

He doesn’t have time to write 10 characters but he has the time to make this work of art of an email and send it to me

Microsoft seems to get progressively worse every year. My work transitioned from google products (email, drive, chat) to Microsoft & it was a humungous step backwards. Everything crashes & doesn't save. Edge sucks. Windows 10 sucks. IE always sucked. Office 365 sucks. One drive sucks. MS Teams sucks. 😑

I’ve noticed a bug in HR that I would like to report. Steps to reproduce:

1. Get offer on LinkedIn/Email
2. Respond politely and optimistically that you’re interested but would like to scale down you’re hours to 32 per week, changes in pay are accepted.

Result: 404 Not found

Expected result: I’m only human let me work part time pls

Got an email today from a random person asking for help on using a thing I have in GitHub. Even though it's not at all a big deal, made me feel so proud :)

On the other hand, every day I work on software responsible for thousands of people a day (not a big deal, but still something that affects thousands per day) and I feel meh about that...

Brains are weird :)

When your co-worker uses needless terminology. It’s your day off and you’re texting from bed.

cw: Do you have access to the email client?

me: You mean the work email? Yes.

cw: Did you set up access to the database or an FTP protocol for userX?

me: You mean an admin account? Yes.

cw: Were we planning on adding more calls to action on projectX?

me: You mean site links? Yes.

I just received an email about my company releasing an official full time work from home policy. I’m so happy.

It coincidentally arrives at the same time I’m building my first desktop PC, which should be ready on Friday.

#Winning

We receive an email from Splunk when errors go above a certain threshold, and a particular service has been especially problematic this week (throwing hundreds of exceptions). Email response from the team mgr responsible for the service.

"We are working to address these errors. We don’t currently have a way to prevent a user who’s account is locked from logging into the service and performing work."

The exception? NullReferenceException: Object reference not set to an instance of an object.

The code? (paraphrasing)

var user = GetUser(request.Login);
if (user.CanPerformWork) ...

<facepalm>

I'm doing my best not to reply .."Really? No way? You do realize we can read code, right?"

Guy rage quit over someone resolve duplicating his bugs (when they were really duplicates) but he kept reopening them repeatedly so the other guy kept resolving them as such till he lost his mind on work chat. A few days later he is now casually sending an email (after being told to do so by management) to apologize but he skirted around apologizing and instead excuses himself by saying "we are all fellow autists to a certain extent."

I just created a free Spotify account using the email spotify@spotify.com. The leisurely breeze that is the input validation team's work at Spotify.

I "accidentally" put my work email address while applying for another job, fr!

Notification pops up at the bottom of the screen... it is an email from a Project Manager.

2 seconds later...

Project Manager via messaging app: "Hey, I've sent you an email"

fuck off bitch... I know that already, it is 20fucking19... notifications are reliable and they work. I don't need a human toast notification to tell me about the other notification that i just received.

Work for a large DoD contractor, tons of development projects.

They just sent an email stating that all unmanaged VM’s must be removed!

Hard enough not having admin rights but no vm’s?

ahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahhabahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahanannaannanaaanannananannananannannananan

!Rant
Got a job offer as an Android Dev, signed the contract, while signing employer asked me if i am a mac or pc user. A day before my joining date got an email from him asking me to bring my mac with me on my first day. Turns out he won't be providing me with a machine to work on :).

Oh man, I fucked up...
I was doing after hours work for client, setup website with https.

Can't work over sftp with current user,so I give it the same user ID as apache, get files transferred and shit.
Go back to change uid, set wrong uid, now my user is ntp, I can't get into root, can't set password...
I fucked up

Tail between the legs, sent email to clients support, asking them to fix my user fuck up, waiting for reply

Office Ninja!

Today, my PM dropped by in the morning and mentioned she had some customer feedback on some item in a project where I'm the holiday replacement for someone else. I already had work to do, so that kind of interruption wasn't welcome.

"Well yeah, just forward it to me, I'll see what I can do", I told her. She agreed. Half an hour later, still no email from her. Hey, that looked promising!

For the rest of the day, I didn't talk to her, avoided speaking at all when she was near and even sneaked by her room (open doors) in silent mode lest I drew her attention and she might have remembered the email.

Until afternoon when I went home, still no email. Success! :-)

Looking for a random pic for work I typed "img" on DuckDuckGo and child pornography appeared.
I sent an email to report the crap, but no reply back.
What should I do more?

Been on winter holiday for 3 days. Went to log in to my work laptop to clear out email - took me 20 minutes to remember my domain password.

Getting old sucks, kids.

Every website we craft at work has some email substitution logic so that addresses you see on the site don't actually exist in the HTML source like that (you wouldn't find them in a format like "foo@example.com").

Instead the @ and the period right before the TLD get replaced with something else (to prevent (dumb) spam bots from using that address and blast it with junk).

Some people replaced them with images in the past (ew), replaced the @ with "(at)" or other stuff.

I made it a habit to render the @ and . by replacing them with span tags which then get a ::before in CSS that contains "content: '@';", so that the @ is visible but is not actually inside the HTML source code.

The classes for these spans then have a random name (persistent for that website though). The first one was called "move-along-nothing-to-see-here", but then I started naming them after Star Wars quotes.

One website's @ class is called "that-s-no-moon" (Obi Wan), others are called "i-have-a-bad-feeling-about-this" (Han Solo), "powerful-you-have-become-the-dark-side-I-sense-in-you." (Yoda) and "these-are-not-the-droids-you-are-looking-for" (Obi Wan).

👨🏽‍💻 Switching between multiple Git accounts: work, personal, freelance?

Ever pushed a commit with Company A's email to Company B's repo? 😩🥶
Been there. Done that. Regretted it immediately.

I just dropped a step-by-step guide on how to set up Git so it automatically picks the right name, email, and SSH key based on your project folder.

No more manual config switching. 💡
✅ No more identity mix-ups
✅ No more commit shame
✅ Just clean, context-aware Git workflows 🙌

🔧 What’s inside:
- Multiple SSH key setup
- Smart .gitconfig using includeIf
- Folder structure that