Boss walks by my desk. Stops by the printer when coming back and brings me this.

*my favorite time of the day - going and coming back from office"

Here's the view

A group of programmers and marketers were traveling to a trade show on a train. Each of the marketers had bought a ticket, but the programmers had only bought one ticket for the lot of them.

One of the programmers was keeping a lookout, and when the conductor neared their car he called out "The conductor's coming!" and all of the programmers piled into the train's lavatory and closed the door. The conductor took the tickets of all of the marketers, and then knocked on the lavatory door and called "Ticket please." The programmers slid their ticket under the door, and the conductor took it and left.

The programmers were laughing at the marketers for the rest of the trip, and the marketers felt like idiots.

On the way back, the marketers decided they would use the same trick and only bought one ticket for them. But this time, the programmers didn't buy a single ticket! Again, one of the programmers kept a lookout for the conductor. When he called "Conductor coming!" all of the programmers piled into one lavatory, and all of the marketers shut themselves into another lavatory.

One programmer came back out of his lavatory, knocked on the other door, and said "Ticket please!"

Height of work pressure:

⚠ I was flashing my ID card instead of unlocking the house door with the keys.

⚠Me and my friends went out for dinner in one of the best restaurants and as I finished, I started walking towards the wash basin with plates in my hand.

⚠I don't login to facebook, youtube, etc.. at my personal internet connection at home... thinking it will be blocked anyway. Till I realized that, I was at home.

⚠Once after talking to one of my friends I ended the conversation saying, "Ok bye... in case of any issues will call you back"

⚠Once I went to a pharmacy and asked for a tab. Pharmacist asked whether I want 250mg or 500mg? I replied 256mb. Thank god he didn't notice.

⚠After a hectic week, went to a movie. In the middle of the movie, when I wanted to check the time, I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the Theatre Screen.

😄So avoid working so hard !😄

Have a great work-life balance.

Lastly...

⚠Extreme Work Pressure:
An employee opens his lunch box on the road side to see, whether he is going to office, or coming back from office.😂😂..

Software engineering is doomed.

The next generation of developers is going to suck as fuck

I've come across a lot of situation that made me think this way.

The most notable examples are right here on devrant.

I've seen a shit ton of rants blaming languages for "bugs" when in fact those "bugs" wouldn't have happened if those fuckers would have read the specifications of said languages.

This new generation doesn't read, when they've got a problem they just fucking go to Google for answers, they don't bother reading specifications, language books, rfc, etc, they don't bother reading where the true source of information are. The documentation ? What's that ? Let's go to stackoverflow first, let's think second.

Same back in school I've seen people in the highest grades that couldn't fucking decompress a tar archive.

In the coming decades we will loose the high skilled people, the people that made the software world as it is today we will be left with fuckers only able to blame things for stuff they don't understand.

This is my first true rant. This is me being pissed off.

Ahahaha I don't know if I cry or laugh..

I slept 1 hour today, woke up, left the kid at school came back home planning on sleeping another 2 hours and coming to work.

Took a shower and remembered I had an important meeting by 8:30 am and it was already 8:10 ... Ran like fucking crazy , ate an orange for breakfast ran like a lunatic in traffic just to arrive at work by 8:34 and be told the meeting has been rescheduled for tomorrow afternoon...

Had to smile to who rescheduled the meeting right now writing this rant :)

Now... Who the fuck sends an email at 00:02 to reschedule a fucking meeting??

Fuck.

Had this yesterday on my way back home from the meeting. Bumped into an old study friend who was never fond of Linux even for servers.

"so what do you use at your company?"
"oh uhm yeah uhm right.... Ehh yes ehhhh so uhm like we use like uhm Linux for the servers"
"ah, and? Works well?"
"uhm well uhm yeah ehh yeah works uhm pretty..... Pretty ehhhhhh good 😅. It appears to eh work.... Like uhm very good for servers after all..."

Hearing that coming out of his mouth....

Damn!

Hello devRant, it's been a while. For anyone who has been following my... situation, here's a little update.

I moved back home to Kansas City, Missouri. Staying with parents for now.

I had to leave my daughter in Los Angeles, which was hard for me... but i can't provide for her living in my car.

I also got divorce papers in the mail from my wife. And I have a lot of court battles coming up to get custody of my daughter so she can live here with me. It's a long road ahead.

On the plus side, my parents took me camping and we kayaked the Little Niangua river! I hadn't gone camping or floating in at least 10 years. It was very relaxing.

At any rate fellas, enjoy and appreciate the good times and the people in your life. You never know when it'll all go to hell.

Writing Python, coming from C#.

"Come on, this can't be that easy!"

Python brought back the fun in programming for me. :)

So I was driving my car the other day and the screen on my radio decided to go blank and the music stopped. I ended up pulling over and turning my car off and back on again.

I had to reboot my car. Didn't see that one coming. 😡😂

There are people in my workplace who ask "why did you set your IDE to dark theme?". How do I convince them that turning off the lights above my cubicle, lowering the screen brightness and having a dark theme is the best thing ever to concentrate?

Not to mention earbuds and a hoodie.

How do I convince them that once you turn to the Dark Side, there's no coming back?

So back in January 2015 I bought my first Mac and wanted to learn Swift. Coming from .Net C# IBOutlet was anew concept for me, had to search for how to make a button event and Google gave that 😐

**I just googled it for the sake of this rant but ya it happened 😅

A repo on GitHub I'm maintaining has grown with 200k downloads / month since I started working on it a year ago. My recipe? I added an npm badge in the readme showing downloads / month and I responded to every issue and reviewed every PR. Now there's so much issues and PRs coming in that we had to add an extra maintainer, feels great! Teamwork, fuck yeah!

Not every PR got merged of course, but every single one of them got reviewed. Just being a good and friendly developer, giving back to the community that has given me so much. Some tips for you maintainers out there. If you have a popular project and no time there's always someone else who's willing to spend time on it, ask around and you will surely find someone else.

Email. Fuck everything about it.

It's an obnoxious queue of messages I somehow must handle. And everyone in society expects you to have email. You can cancel your phone number, maybe even live without a house... but every hobo still must check their email.

It is an endless shitstream of things I don't want. Like a garden with some nice tomato plants, but then a really smelly weed starts invading and no matter what you do it keeps coming back.

I don't want to login to unsubscribe. I don't care about your "notifications center", or "managing the offers you receive from us".

And then your boss asks you to design an email campaign... I don't want to receive that shit, why would our customers? And even if I agreed with using email as a communication channel... YOU THOUGHT CSS IN INTERNET EXPLORER WAS A BITCH?

No really. Fuck email. Fuck everything about it.

Had a random dream last night where different JavaScript Frameworks were different flavour ice creams. No matter which one I tried I kept coming back to vanilla...

Just bumped into this app on Play Store yesterday.
I've never really felt so addicted to any social network before.
I can't seem to put my phone down. And if I do, I find myself coming back to it!

Coming out the test today. There is a message from the Professor in the back of the test.

My first poem for programmer girl 😘😘😘

My life is incomplete without you,
You are semicolon of my life

You are my increment operator,
you make my value increases

I am username and you are my password,
without you No one can access me

You are my initializer,
without you my life would point to nothing (NULL or “0”)

If I were a function you must be my parameter,
Because I will always need you

Can you be my private variable?
I want to be only one who can access you

You are my compiler,
My life wouldn’t start without you

You are my loop condition ,
I keep coming back to you

My love to you is like recursive function,
It will never ends & Will never enter into infinite loop

Forever and Ever

In an alternate universe, devs live in their own country.

They make their own rules and dictate how much they are paid. They maintain the entire world’s infrastructure.

They don’t go to work, since their entire country is the workplace and guess what? Cold beers are free(a thank you from the beer company guys for coming up with all their inventory management systems)

Pizza is free too.

There is no government (laws are passed depending on upvotes on devRant )

No racism, sexism or any other ism ending words . Devs just code.

Oh, and the state police, preferably known as keyboard warriors patrol the streets and offenders are punished by limited internet speeds. 😂. It is said some actually commit suicide because of this unbearable punishment.

Fuck yeah they have coffee farms. That’s the only thing they don’t accept as *gratitude from other nations because those sons of bitches might fuck that up too.

And everyone drives teslas 😂

Okay I have to get back to work now. That multi universe travel machine won’t buy itself.

So I says to the wife, I says, “When you go to Costco tomorrow, I need a new Oral B electric toothbrush. My old one’s battery is no longer able to hold a charge.” I’m picturing her coming back with one that’s pretty similar to the one I had. You turn it on, you brush your teeth, you turn it off.

She comes back with the Oral B Pro 6000. Go on. Look it up. I’ll wait.

So this thing has about 6 modes and Bluetooth that connects you to an app that not only keeps track of how often you brush, but tracks your performance and gives you trophies if you do well at specific tasks and techniques. And there’s a coach to take you on an “oral health journey” depending on your particular goals. There’s even a mount you can buy to attach your phone to your mirror so the app can watch how you brush and give you pointers. I don’t have the mount so I got an 85% on performance because who can hold a phone pointed perfectly at your face while brushing? The final report had what might be the app dev’s attempt at a pun.

It’s 2019 and everyone is judging you. Why not your toothbrush as well?

Shame me into coming back, why don't you?

Damn, devRant. No chill.

Not a rant, just my thoughts :)
At November and October of last year I was very frustrated with everything - everything was annoying me and I was bored even with coding. I needed a break and do something different - go somewhere.

So we decided with friends that we will go to Georgia to spent there New Year Eve. Right now I'm coming back from airport by bus to my city aftertrip but can't sleep because I'm energized as fuck! Whole week without internet (sometimes we got open wifi to check buses or maps), without local sim card, without roaming, just our group and good attitude. We visited almost whole north of Georgia riding in taxis, marshrutka, even autostop, and it was fucking awesome.

So, when you are exhausted, take a break and regenerate your baterries, work is not everything! Just wanted to share this with you :) Can't wait to go to work in monday to write some code :) Life is beautiful!

On photo - my friend takes photo of Kazbek Mountain :)

Happened half a year ago (parents both use Linux although they're very a-techie).

*Dads laptop comes back from store after a repair*
Dad: (on the phone) hello son, could you help me out? they put some weird stuff on my laptop at the repair centre...
Me: Weird stuff? like what?
Dad: It's a virus I think
Me: A virus??
Dad: Definitely a virus!
Me: And what is this virus called?
Dad: Windows 10!
Me: Oh yes coming over asap to get that removed!

I put elementary OS on it again when i went to visit my parents.

Okay so my weekend project went well :D put my retropie system inside of this old r2d2 I've had collecting dust. Has a cooling fan inside as well as a 16x2 lcd I was playing with. Got a red led tied to the rpis txd pin, ports in the front for easy access and power cord and hdmi coming out the back.

So I spent 4-5 weeks explaining how shit the current code base was, implemented gulp tasks to lint js, CSS etc, written shed loads of coding standards and best practices to follow. At this point everyone was onboard with the changes and thought brilliant were going to start getting some good code coming out of this team.

I go on holiday for a week, come back and fucker has ignored the documentation disabled the linters in the gulp tasks and the code is back to square one SHIT!!

Plus everyone still committing to master!!!!

Why do I bother!!

Do you also got any old game, that you're coming back to? Mine is Mafia

Swagger does not send request body for GET calls.! WHAT THE FUCK..! And the argument supporting is get calls should not have any request payloads and rather should have response payloads since its a "get" call. Are you serious?? What if there are parameters to be passed which cannot be accomodated in the params or the header. Even though people are kind of literally abusing on their issues page still they adamantly refuse to add support for this.

Swagger you had high standards in my book. You just fell so deep down there is no coming back.

Fuck today.

Today I was supposed to go into work and set up a dozen or so units for beta testing (its been a year and a half coming)..

Got up nice and early to get a head start on things. Stubbed (and broke) my motherfucking toe, then spilled my cereal milk on my laptop.. subsequently spend the following 2 hours tearing down and cleaning my poor little lappy. Get her all put back together, starting to feel a little better about the day. Push the power button, and fucking nothing but a tiny little fan noise for half a damn second.

With this luck I don't even want to move, lest a magic falling anvil decides to adorn my head..

<marquee> coming back to websites.

> Writing some code 😀
> Compile it
> 10 errors 😣😣
> Debugging mode on😎
> Write about 100 print statements to debug the code
> At last found errors and now remove those print statements😅
> Compile code
> 2 out of 30 test cases pass😤😤
> Exhausted and angry😡
> Silicon valley new episode arrives🎉
> Super excited after watching the episode and think like you too can code like Richard Henricks😎😎
> Coming back to the old code and build logic from scratch
> Compile and finally all test cases pass
> Task completed😂😂

This is probably gona make me sound arrogant, but fuck it, you don’t know who I am, and I need to RANT!

I hate it when B.A.’s who have never studied UI or UX rail-road over my design decisions, and I just gota go along with it cos they in charge.
Then, when I make the interface the way they want it, all sorts of problems arise… Mother fucker, I saw this shit coming, and that’s why I designed it the way that I did.
Now I gota tell them how to solve the problems by doing what I originally said, and when they finally see the light, I gota waste more time re-doing the interface.
I once went through 5 fucking iterations of “Let’s try it this way”, Just to end up back with my original design spec cos these fuckers can’t even imagine what shit would look like, and how it will interact.

Now you would think after this happens a few times they would learn to trust my design skills, but noooo, Mr B.A. has to piss all over my ideas every time.
And every FUCKING time, we end up going back to what I originally proposed…
Learn your fucking lesson dumb ass!!!

*drops mic & goes straight to the bar*

our HR made a survey about home office and how people think about coming back to office in the future. Shortly afterwards, our new CEO sent us an e-mail saying that he would like to see more employees in the office again soon. After all, it is paid for and must therefore be used. Of course, it's better for everyone to commute 2 hours to work every day, and last year home office worked well for everyone.
Personally, I can do without constantly sitting with my colleagues in a noisy office where 10 people are on the phone at the same time.

Bonus: In his opinion, software is better when it has more LOC.

Bonus2: Last working day for me is end of September. After that I start my new job with 43 days vacation per year :D

Because of hardware failure we had to move some vpns from one datacenter to another.

The team of highly untrained monkeys at my hosting provider were hired to do this. First they ran backups of all the systems. Then they started the moving process. A few hours later they were done. We got an email everything was back online.

So we restarted all our processes and no data was coming in from our Raspberry's around the country. So we start a little investigation. What did these buffons do, they changed our rsa keys.

So we kindly ask them to put the old keys back so we do not have to fix 200 changed key warnings on systems that are not remotely accesible.

Apperently something that can't be done because their back up process is automated and always makes new keys.

Holy fucking fuck, whats the point in having a backup its not an exact copy. Is this fucking normal?

Now I will be spending the next few weeks literally standing in cow shit reconnecting Raspberry's.

Thanks a fucking lot. Not!

Coming back to the office after being down with sickness for 3 days. Apparently the two other People on the project doesn't talk together, only when im the middle man making sure they talk, and we got a big test on Monday.....

When the client asks why you billed them for something that was supposedlly your fault and takes a defense when you turn around with the emails and documentation to support that the code is working like it should and was requested by them... Awkward silence... And they still come back with well could you knock off half the hours. Client==fired

Side note.......have been having issues with this clent for a year so it was their time coming.

At an office job I worked at (2018), one day we were told to drop everything we were doing for the day and gather around, because there was a lady (about 70 years old) who had stopped by to give us "Life Advice".

The lady started her speech with this statement:

"In 1974, I lived in a mansion with 7 servants at my service and 4 cars".

I'm not making this up.

Then she rambled on for 15 mins about how she faced difficulties in her life, starting from studying in a boarding school in Switzerland, then coming back to India to work at the Taj Hotel (Mumbai) under a team of world-renowned chefs who were mean to her, at her internship which paid her about $2500 USD a month in 1985.

But the point she made was, in spite of all her difficulties, she never gave up and kept working.

When she was finally done, NOBODY clapped. She felt awkward as hell and we saw it on her face.

I still chuckle when I think about that incident.

I’d heard rumblings from my friends in other parts of the organization that there were going to be layoffs coming, so I’d warned my little engineering team. One of my team was vacationing abroad.

When he came back, one of my teammates told him it was all over and we were going to get fired.

He told me that he’d been told that and I said that it probably wouldn’t affect us and that I wouldn’t worry about it (I was under the impression that the layoffs would only really hit customer-facing roles).

The member of my team who just got back from vacation, the one who I reassured, was the only member of my team who was part of the group laid off.

Goddamn it.

When you teach someone to use git and all.of a sudden you are required to supply all the answers when they run into problems:/

I tried to point them to Google and they still keep coming back. Why the fuck did I do this to myself?

Deutsche Bahn once again.
Deutsche Bahn and I will never be friends I guess.

I'm at a train station where my train arrives only once per hour.

As if that's not enough time to wait already, the first train got canceled.

I was like "Ok, that's Deutsche Bahn. That can happen (and will happen always). Guess that I will wait for another hour".

Minutes before the planned arrival of the second train, they announced that the second train isn't coming either.

I have been at a fucking train station for bloody 3 hours approximately.

Let's wait and see, if my train will ever arrive.

Honestly, thinking about buying camping tools to sleep at this train station and go to university and come back to this place just because of this problem.

A few months back, me and my friends built our own Web Dev firm. I'm the one who talk to clients, customers, etc. and these have been the most ridiculous messages I received from them:

1. I don't like it, but I don't know why?

2. I have an idea! Can we change the design?

3. We want something with more of a `wow` factor.

4. Can't you just copy their logo?

5. But we are also a startup. You must understand that we can't pay the full price.

6. So do you have the file open and ready to edit/

7. Can't you just copy and paste it in?

8. We don't have much of a budget but there are plenty of projects coming your way.

These are just a few of the huckleberryfuck our clients sent. I'm not sure if I can handle them anymore.

Inner Me: Where the fuck is this bug coming from
> Set a breakpoint in every single place where the method I'm using is being called.
> Try calling the method before every function call
Inner Me: FUCKING DAMNIT! It's been hours now
Inner Me: No way it's the library I'm using.
Inner Me: That couldn't possibly be the problem
> Try running it again and delete some more shit
Inner Me: FUCK MEEEEEEEE
> Getting delirious
> Begin to look at some stupid memes.
> Come back to it.
> Have an Ah-ha moment
> Try running it again but rearrange the order of the method calls
> Still no luck
> try git stashing a bunch of my changes
> git stash apply them back
> erase the method call entirely
Inner Me: well that sort of worked, but now all my numbers are incomplete
Inner Me: FUCKING FINE!!! I'LL LOOK IN THE GODDAMN LIBRARY
Inner Me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK a stupid integer casting was occuring to my floats!!!

Now Talking to my girlfriend.

Me: The problem was in the library I was using
Girlfriend: How are you going to fix it if it's in the library?
Me: ... I can, because I wrote the library...
Me: FUCK ME RIGHT?
Me: I guess moral of the story; sometimes the problems starts with ourselves
GF: Hahaha. Thats Deeep

After ten months. I still hate Instagram's algorithmic news feed. Just because I like a lot of memes doesn't mean I want to miss out on my rarely-posting-friend's posts thanks.
While the chronological feed is never coming back, I just wish they'd add a switch and let us choose what we like.

I love coming back to old code from when I was learning a new language and cleaning it up/making it better. It confirms that’s I’ve learned something :)

I feel guilty for being such a murderer.
I killed Cortana so many times over, but her ghost keeps coming back to haunt me.

Thanks to Devrant I've learned about rubber duck debugging. Never heard of it before! It reminds me of a story many moons ago when I worked for a certain multinational company as a business analyst. The company brought in some consultants who basically stole the work my team was already doing on a big project (a horrendous series of spreadsheets linked to data coming from the core systems) and sold it back to the company for an insane amount of money as their idea.

When they launched the new product, the team I was in was asked to test and review it. It took my colleague ten seconds to bring the whole thing to its knees and trigger a corrupt data export back into the core systems. Bearing in mind this external company somehow managed to charge tens of thousands of pounds. So what did my colleague do? Hack the system? Some kind of complicated sabotage? Nope. He typed "FISH" into one of the spreadsheet cells! Thus the FISH test was born.

That day I learned several things: it's easy to break things with a fish; the importance of validating your input; and the satisfaction of showing up the smug bastards who stole your ideas and work.

Unfortunately it's same old same old.

Deadline approaching, changes keep coming in.

Deadline gets extended due to influx of change requests. Director says "ah the deadline is put back, that means we can add in even more functionality"

Anyone got a cyanide pill handy?

I just realized the most fucked up shit that leads me to wanna runaway from this job even more...

On the beginning (3 years ago) I used to be really thrilled , plan things really professionally, make models, uml, all the shit, try to fix things and everything you should expect from a great dev.

The problem is that in 3 years I had to "replan" so much things and so desperately quickly and have so many rework with such shitty projects that I kind of panic every time I have to plan something and I end up thinking I'm not capable of developing complex systems anymore.

All because these fucking managers that never make their mind, so my mind sees this:

"Fuck, 10 months for this shit that could have been done in 1 ? You suck dude."

Actually is management that sucks.
I've been doing some small projects on the side, just for the sake of it and boy, I'm rocking it.

My self esteem is coming back on tracks.

Fuck those fucker, they can die chocking on their own misery.

A group of programmers and marketers were traveling to a trade show on a train. Each of the marketers had bought a ticket, but the programmers had only bought one ticket for the lot of them.

One of the programmers was keeping a lookout, and when the conductor neared their car he called out "The conductor's coming!" and all of the programmers piled into the train's lavatory and closed the door. The conductor took the tickets of all of the marketers, and then knocked on the lavatory door and called "Ticket please." The programmers slid their ticket under the door, and the conductor took it and left.

The programmers were laughing at the marketers for the rest of the trip, and the marketers felt like idiots.

On the way back, the marketers decided they would use the same trick and only bought one ticket for them. But this time, the programmers didn't buy a single ticket! Again, one of the programmers kept a lookout for the conductor. When he called "Conductor coming!" all of the programmers piled into one lavatory, and all of the marketers shut themselves into another lavatory.

One programmer came back out of his lavatory, knocked on the other door, and said "Ticket please!"

I was given a 1700 nzd budget to make my own computer.

The mouse i threw in with my own money. I went 150nzd above budget and the rest is coming during the week.

Its going to be my first custom computer. And im fucking excited like its christmas back when i was 7 years old!!!

Lots of stress and strain the last months private and at work.
Headache all the days and no time to get back to my self. Programming starts to get tedious.

Now changing my life completely.
Broke up with my girlfriend and started looking for a new work - finally got a new contract today.
Dismissal coming on Monday.
3 months to go to get a enjoyable life.

PS: lurking some months and finally created an account. Thanks for all the rants which let me smile!

When you're coming back from vacation and you are praying nothing has gone wrong in your absence

YouTube. I used to love it a lot but now I don't recognize it. It pushes its agenda everywhere only certain content becoming popular. And regular people don't have much of a way for getting noticed unless they're in an extremely niche section. It's gone the way of the TV and I don't think it's coming back barring a massive internal restructuring.

You have to integrate company A system with company B.
You look up B`s api documentation, write the necessary code, test it thoroughly. Done
__________________________________
A wild dev from B has appeared!!!
------------------------------------------------------

him > you cannot use this SDK to implement this solution. You must use a different one...

You > (coming back to him after scouring through the docs) . Ok which sdk is it then? I can't find it anywhere. Could you send it to me pls?
him > I don't kbow, my knowledge doesn't go that far. Send an email to the dev department.

After sending the email, and spending a couple of days trying to figure out which sdk was he referring to. His department answers that the sdk you should use, is the one you already used. The only one they have.

A couple of days lost, because certain smart-ass could not refrain himself from meddling in the project.

What would you do?

Note: Killing him is out of the question :)

*Intensely staring the screen and solving a problem in my head, I can feel I'm close to the final answer, the answer to the truth, the holy Line of Code and that it will forever chang-*
PM: hey, do you know why my mouse doesn't click anymore?

...

I’ve learned JavaScript in 2012, and after a few years of C++, C, Java and Python, I am seriously coming back to js. And oooh boi, things have changed. Back in the day 😅, jquery was the coolest lib ever, Nodejs was a new wild beast (v0.7.0). Kids these days don’t really how lucky they are.

Android development: Just got a RecyclerView to use two different types of ViewHolders. What a bitch to get working, but the performance benefits will always keep me coming back...

Reasons 1 and 2 arent that important to me. The main reason I code is #3.

1) Brain exercise. I always feel sharp after a coding session, even if it ended in disaster.
2) Lots to do! There's never a full day in code. Make your own universe, if you so desire.
3) Pride. I have a pride problem. I never felt proud of myself no matter what I do. I graduated with a melancholy feeling, same deal when getting my license, same deal when passing a test (God, glad that's over!)... But code makes me proud. I love what I make. I want to show everyone. I want to show it to everyone before it's even finished because I just can't wait. I want everyone to use it and to love it. Because I sure do, and it's the best thing ever.

I could make a viral video, produce a triple platinum record, or build a billion dollar business and still not feel the same level of genuine satisfaction and happiness that I may get from writing good code.

It always keeps me coming back.

Coming back to web development after being in the army! Ready to pick up where I left out!

I'm coming back to devrant after a while, I'd like to throw in a hi to today's devrant feed!

Here's a real tip for people new to the industry.

It's one of those things that's been said over and over again but very few can really seem to employ. I suggest you learn it /well/.

You are not your code. Criticisms of your code, ideas, or your thought processes, is not a criticism of YOU. You absolutely cannot take criticisms of your work personally.

We are engineers. We strive to seek the best solution at all times.

If someone has found a problem with your code or with an idea or whatnot, it is coming from a place of "this is not the best solution", NOT "you're an idiot".

It's coming from a place of "I'm closing this PR because it is not a change I feel suits this project", NOT "I'm closing this PR because it's coming from a woman".

It's coming from a place of "This feature request is ridiculous/this bug is not actually a bug", NOT "you're a fucking idiot, fuck you".

It's coming from a place of "I've already had to address this in a number of issues before and it's eaten up a considerable amount of my time already", NOT "I don't even know you and this I don't have time for a nobody".

You do not get to be bitchy to maintainers because they denied your request. It's not a reflection of you at all. But if you're arguing with someone who has maintained a piece of code for almost a decade, and they're telling you something authoritative, believe them. They're probably smarter than you on this subject. They've probably thought about it more. They've probably seen their code used in many different places. They have more experience than you with that codebase in almost all cases.

Believe me, if we cared about who was behind all of the issues, pull requests, etc. we get, we'd get NOTHING done. Stop taking shit personally. It's a skill, not a defense mechanism. Nobody has the time to sugar coat every little thing.

Let's normalize directness and stop wasting time during technical discussions into opportunities for ego-stroking and circle-jerking and back-patting.

Just a friendly reminder to fellow developers to take care of yourself.

If your system is constantly pumping out cortisol, even when threats are minor, it gets desensitized to the stress signals. We used to react to cortisol with the fight-or-flight response when our lives were in real danger. Nowadays it's produced when you disagree with your coworker or there's a deadline coming up. So your cortisol rises but you neither fight nor run. The result is a stress response that isn't functioning properly. This is when burnout symptoms develop. Same goes for testosterone, dopamine and some other hormones and neurotransmitters. Read up and start proper work hygiene that includes workouts, fresh air activities and manual hobbies.

Your back, wrists and eyes aren't the only things you have to watch out for when coding long hours. Cheers and have a fun weekend!

I began my first Linux / i3 install 7 days ago when I posted my first rant... And today I'm declaring it officially *done*! (Mostly because if I don't, I'll spend another week configuring the damn thing.)

Here it is. Few minor things to edit/fix (like the fact that it sometimes randomly logs me out after coming back from hibernation... Yeah, "minor") but the functionality is mostly there. I can ("should") get back to work!

Worst codding interruptions? That's easy: fucking meetings.

You know they're coming up. They start to drain your focus. You double check the clock/start time. You ask yourself if you were supposed to prepare anything. You typically waste an hour of your time over something that could have been a fucking e-mail (or doesn't even matter at all). You come back to your desk, and your focus is broken and you wonder when the next meeting is coming up.

Who's got time to be an imposter. 🤷‍♂️

I am out of my depth 90% of the time, always diving into areas that are foreign to me, you just need to enjoy the buzz of knowing you are coming out the other side more knowledgeable then you did going in.

But if you do get overwhelmed with this condition, step back, take a breather, and use that moment to think things through at the big picture level before moving forward again, sometimes the right solution is hard to think off when you're to focused and drowning your way through a bad one.

!dev && rant
Temperature causing temper!!!

Summer 2009...
Me: Dad, can me and sis go swim in the pool?
Dad: No son, you can only swim if it's 25°C or higher.
Which in practice meant that we could only swim a few days each summer. Average in Belgium used to be about 21°C.

Spring 2019, my younger siblings...
Little sis: Mom, can we go swim in the pool?
Mom: Lol sure, it's only April but it's already way hot enough.. and during summer it'll be too hot to do the work on setting up the pool anyway.

Winter 2029, in Antarctica...
Me, to my children: During my old days my children, we had this thing called snow!! And we lived in the wasteland that used to be the glorious Europe, back when it was still habitable.. you should've seen it, now it's a desert, but back then it was awesome!
My children: Mum!! He's acting senile again, and talking about things that don't exist!!!

Coming to the crux of the problem right now, fuck me.. I'm tired as fuck but can't sleep because already in the fucking spring, my house is too fucking hot to be able to sleep without sweating like a pig!!!
AaaaaAAAAA 😣

I found that meme on Reddit (r/linuxmemes) and it perfectly describes my feelings about using KDE on top of Manjaro. Sometimes finding the thing I want takes way too long. So far I think I'll be coming back to GNOME

Years ago, I joined a company making games for handheld consoles.

Because a game's audio needs to be tested, too, I connected earphones to the console so that:
0. I wouldn't bother others w/ the sounds coming out of the console.
/* !Everyone wants to hear that crap. */
1. I could hear the sounds better.

PM: * Enters the room. *
Me: * Focused on testing the game. *
PM: * Walks up to me from the side, starts talking. *
Me: * Focused on testing the game. *
PM: * After approx. 30 seconds of complete lack of response from me, kind of irritated, knocks on my desk to get my attention. *
Me: * Take out the earphones. *
Oh, hi, how can I help you?
PM: Haven't you heard a word I said?
Me: Well, no. I am testing the game, including the audio.
PM: You need to pay attention to what's going on around you.
Me: Testing audio is one of my responsibilities. I am using earphones because of the reasons [0-1].
PM: Even still, you just need to pay attention to what's going on around you.
PM: * Finally explains the reason for him bothering me, then goes back to his lair. *

Moral of the story: Fuck being good at what you do && knowing your responsibilities.
When PM wants something from you, you better give him the attention he wants.

/* The expectation being I grow an extra pair of eyes && ears, so that I see the guy coming && am prepared to listen to him whenever he wants something _while_ doing the best job I possibly can. */

At work the other day...

Guy: "Oh hey I was thinking if you could help me with an application to visualize some data."

Me: "Ooookay...what did you have in mind?"

Guy: "I think we have XML files that could be turned into graphs...oh and we could add some trend lines. (Getting more excited) And maybe we could supplement it with live data...oh hey and maybe we could add real time alerts via email..."

Me: *thinks to self...there is no way in hell I am starting to work on something that he is literally coming up with requirements as he's talking* "I need specifics...so go take some time, think it through and get back to me with concrete details and examples."

Guy: "Ok. That should be enough to get you started for now at least."

That would be a big fuck no, good sir. Haven't started and won't start it. He has never mentioned it to me again since then.

Coming back to own old code brings pain 🙃

!rant

Hey guys!!! just signed up... but have been coming here everyday for the last few weeks.. it feels awsome to be here guys... :D
Gotta deliver part of a project tomorrow, soo... back to coding

My college updated a firmware of our device. The device stopped working. He then proceeded to update all the other devices one by one with the same new firmware before coming to a conclusion that it is indeed the firmware that is broken. We needed to send all the devices back to the manufacturer and almost missed our deadline.

Tried both vscode and atom. However, keep coming back to Sublime Text, now only if they provided completion as good as IntelliJ, they would beat everyone

Booked an Uber...
ETA: 10 minutes...
*Checks 4 minutes later*
ETA: 12 minutes...
*Calls the driver to confirm pick up*
*waits for another 4 minutes*
ETA: 8 minutes
*Types in this rant with passive aggression*
ETA: 10 minutes...

So, I've waited 10 minutes after an initial ETA of 10 minutes and now I gotta wait 10 minutes extra.

Arggghhhhhh!

I'm not sure who the fuck is at fault here?
The devs? The ones who design the flow? The ones handling the execution at low levels?
Or us, the customers who keep on coming back to their services succumbed to the fact that we don't have many options!

Update: I've had to wait for half an hour till my cab could reach me.
HALF AN HOUR = Practically the time it would have taken me to walk to the cab!

So, I just put my PC back together after a thorough internal cleaning.

And I just stepped on a small screw.
FUCK IT. THE CASE IS COMING OFF AGAIN

Coming back to devRant after two years, there's nothing like home really.

Coming up to (very) tight deadline..

Manager - "Stick in a temporary fix, if the data is mocked out it will do for the demo. We really want to show this feature."
Me - "Okay, I"ll pick up the technical debt after the demo."

*Changes are coded and rolled out*

Manager calls me over to his desk..

Manager - "This feature isn't bringing back real data."

Do these kind of people exist in all companies?

Leaving work with no bugs in the code! Everything works flawlessly!
Coming back the next day and all of a sudden nothing works and we need to spend the whole day getting it to work as well as it did yesterday.
There seems to be programming gnomes, ruining our code at nights!

Have you ever been pair coding with someone who uses shotgun debugging? I am about to claw my eyes out! What is shotgun debugging you ask?
Code doesn't work... What do we do?
I start thinking about possible flow, how to go back to what works, where to insert debugging statements. My partner interrupts my thought and says - what if we change this variable name?
...uh what?
What if that fixes it
It won't!
Well how do you know if you don't try?
I change the variable name - of course nothing works and now I forgot the possible solution I was thinking about...
Starting over... I again start coming close to the idea... Interrupts me again. What if we comment out this random line?
Why what's your reasoning?
Answer: *Shrug* idk might work...
...rinse and repeat
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???!
I literally started muting my computer sound so I can not hear him while I think and that helps tremendously. This is programming not magic, people!!! Stop throwing random "what if" suggestions!

One of the worst guys I've worked with was a guy from Romania that got at consulting gig where I used to work. He didn't have an apartment at first, so one of the senior guys let him live at his house to get going. He repaid that favor by drinking all the wine in the house, leaving glasses everywhere. He also sang opera on the front porch early in the morning disturbing all the neighbours.

At work he spent more time outside smoking his strong foreign sigarettes than inside coding. One day he just disappeared, and no one could get a hold of him on the phone or email. Days turned to weeks, and our manager ended up sending him an email saying "I don't know where you went, but don't bother coming back".

The best part of this story is that when we were hiring the next time, he actually applied. You know what he wrote? "I'M BETTER NOW".. 😂😂

(The sad thing is that the code he wrote wasn't half bad, but the guy? Jesus. We just called him Vlad. Don't know his real name to this date)

VSCode you fucking piece of shit!

Just got my code working and rewarded myself with tweaking some of the configurations. Coming back to my file and it's all irrevertably messed up with randomly pasted and probably some deleted code snippets.

How's that even possible? 😡

MANAGER: "Hey Slug, I just got off the phone with $partner about $issue and they want to have a meeting with us to discuss it. Send them an email and schedule something for Thursday morning."

WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK I AM, YOUR PERSONAL SECRETARY!!??? If you're the one who has a specific day and time of day that works this week, and if you were talking to them anyway, then how about YOU schedule the meeting????? And of course $partner comes back with "Does 10:30 work?" and so now I'm just playing middle-man. Who could have seen THAT coming.........

My very first wow, was back in 2011 as a freshman at university, algorithm classes. Our first language was Pascal, (because it was easy to learn and get to the idea of programming.) so, lecturer wrote Hello World! and that moment was the best part, when I realized that was called a program. After all these years I still remember this output. ❤️ awesome.
After this, its injected in my veins and soul. Even when I come home drunk or coming from the friends, I open my macbook and trying to write some cool , nerdy staff.

Its my life, my passion, my hobby. I dropped everything for this. ^^

Long story short, every time I feel amazing when I do something new and interesting.

People who don't mind their business.

So a while back, in a casual conversation I mentioned to a customer that I maybe might *possibly* have some jewish ancestry, on my *fathers* side, like my grandparents. Distant ancestry. Like the sort of distance that leads to things like dumb polish jokes.

Anyway, this guy starts coming in on a regular basis and talking about jewish related things constantly and I just want to ring him up and be left alone.

He asks me "so aren't you supposed to be in synagogue or something? I thought you're people were really adamant about not working on the sabbath?"

I looked at him deadpan and said "Money is my religion. Have a nice day."

He laughed nervously "uh yeah, thats good, okay, gotta run."

Best part was he forgot his eleven cents in change.

I was a tad drunk last night because the week was... more than exhausting.

I felt like a pinhata yesterday - pretty beaten up and gutless.

Woke up this morning still a lil tipsy and decided to just be happy and don't give a damn.

Decided to take a hot bath to get nice and relaxed.

My smartphone decided to commit suicide and slided in the bath tub while I was in the kitchen making coffee.... And water was still running.

:) Bye bye smartphone, no more annoying messages.

While bathing, I relaxed a bit too much I guess.

Felt a bit of pain but then so much better because something in my back "plopped" back to where it belonged I guess?

I managed to rip off the shower curtain with my foot since it was a very short moment of "fucking frigging shit that hurt".

During that moment I also created a great flood, bath room is still wet...

And the funniest thing is: I don't give a damn.

Smartphone is definitely dead, ordered a new one, will arrive next week.

Guess I should stay the weekend on the couch before I accidentally blow up the mansion.

:)

I don't know where this good mood is coming from, but damn it has been a long time.

How long do my fellow devRanters spend per day coding? I will spend about 10 hours per day 6/7 days per week.

I ask this because I'm wondering if I need to re-balance my life choices. I took a whole day off
over the weekend and ended up feeling more rejuvenated coming back to my code this Monday.

This new trend of platforms spamming with content discovery fucking suck. Nobody wants to follow multiple profiles with the exact same fucking content, especially when most of them are just people jumping on the bandwagon with more generic content and nothing to make it distinguishable. Also if 10 million people saw something on your platform, the it's pretty fucking sure already been posted and shared on every single platform out there, why the fuck would you still keep recommending it weeks or even months later?

I know spamming users with random (statistically more engaging) content leads to improved customer engagement as people sooner or later click these thing out of curiosity or boredom, but eventually they get tired of it altogether and leave for good. What happened to Netflix will also happen to YouTube, Instagram, and all other platforms unless they significantly improve the balance between content discovery and content continuity (i.e. the content each user follows and is coming back for).

I get so fucking awkward and autistic when i sit at work 8h a day and just work... I cant fucking communicate with people. I behave like the most extreme "nice guy" beta shithead and its hard to fight it.

Went to put coffee in the sink now and a girl was washing the dishes. In the same time another girl was coming into the kitchen. I stopped and wanted to wait for her to wash them. The girl walking in looked at me weird. I was turning around pretening like im searching something. She asked hey do u need something. I then turned a 360 in place (oh my fucking God) walked towards the sink 1 step and then 1 step back as if i forgot to walk. Then i replied i just wanted to wash the coffee. And then i awkwardly put the coffee in sink for the girl to clean my coffee too

So fucking embarrassing!

Only when i work from home at my pace within my environment ALONE (im the biggest introvert) is when i dont become autistic. I can communicate. Im an alpha chad

coming back from monday OoO to this email chain from user 1. "hey i get an error please help" 2. cc teammate 3. cc my boss. 4. cc his boss. 5. meeting between him and someone on a different team who'll 'take care of it'
Get pinged in slack before i even sit down 'please help'
"hey man, whats the error?"
'oh i get a java exception in $application_completely_unrelated_to_anything_weve_ever_worked_together_on and you've fixed errors like this for me before can you do your magic . #bro

Who did I piss off in my life to have to deal with this bullshit? First day off of vacation. I am vacation hungover and just regular hungover. Left my Xanax at home. I just sat through a 45 minute meeting that I didn't have to be in for longer than three minutes. I have what my work place calls scrum in 7 minutes, another fucking meeting I don't have to be in cuz vacation. I wasn't even planning on coming in today except for the fact that my fucking boss came in, in the middle of his vacation, to schedule a meeting this afternoon and then go ghost when I try to either reschedule or at least ask what my fucking responsibility in this meeting is this whole thing is making me sick to my stomach because anger triggers my anxiety which triggers my stomach issues which triggers my phobia which triggers more anxiety which then triggers my anxiety. Gods fucking dammit. Why did I come back from vacation just to arrive in meeting hell? Nothing is okay.

Just got myself an iPhone se. Was proud android fan for 4 years.

No hate, but android apps really feel like cheap knock-offs.

I'm never coming back.

I wrote a file transfer thing to appease the initial idea that keeps coming back into my head every so often, like it's trying to haunt me. Problem: No mobile provider will let me test it, as it's meant to throw disgusting numbers of SMS messages at someone waiting for them. How many, you ask? Well, 1MB of data translates to about 8100 "standard-length" SMS messages. (Standardized length, non-"long" SMS messages are, at best, 70 UCS-2, 140 ASCII, or 160 7-bit characters.) It does work, though, as if I just write out all the SMS messages to files and read those in (in place of actual SMS messages, different delivery of the same data) it works flawlessly.

Why would I ever wanna make this? Well, T-Mobile seems to be more concerned with building new cell towers, rather than fucking fixing the ones currently working. The mobile data component usually dies for 8 or 9 hours a day in this medium-size city, but SMS still works, so... just use that to transfer data!

devRant's gamification really does work! I find myself coming back at least twice a day :O

How often do you check in here?

Starting. Seriously I'm closing that gap on turning 30 and I'm tired of being a wage slave so I'm teaching myself by using resources I've found online but the immense amount of knowledge I need seems unsurmountable.

I'm coming home from work and learning for at least two hours before going to bed and going back to work but it seems so far until I get to be creating stuff instead of just trying to absorb as much of the basics as fast as possible.

Never lose your sense of wonder when it comes to working with clients. Client berated us saying her data were outdated. Ok. Check the file the third party that generated the data is sending us.

Outline all stated discrepancies in the data back to the client, showing that everything lines up with what we are receiving.

Client is frustrated. Contact the third party in their behalf.

Third party support: “oh yea, client had us start sending data to your competitor like a month ago”

Bruh. Bruh. Bruh.

Fortunately the client wants to stay with us and is getting their data pointed back but how in the hell do you forget that. The reason the client when looking at competition (at least guessing looking at previous call records) is to get faster processing of the data coming from the third party. How are you gonna forget you turned off the sending when you are so worried about speed?! Most of our clients are running 7-8 figure businesses by the way.

Thoughts prior to feedback meeting, about how it's gonna go.

---------------------------------------------------------
Scenario one:
Supervisor: The shit is this? You call this a research work? Get the fuck out of here! You're fired and even your unborn kids are banned from coming into this institute ever again!

Me: *walks out sobbing* (dunno how one can walk out of a zoom meeting, but this is imaginary so who's counting?)

Scenario two:
S: Umm, good work. I just don't think it's presentable. Maybe come back in like a few weeks when you actually polish this into a "real scientific work".

Me: *sobs after meeting. Starts preping for seppuku cuz no idea where I'm headed with this work any further*

Scenario three:
S: nah man. This is no good. Let's start from the bottom. Like, start data collection from the beginning or something.

Me: *sobs and commits seppuku on the meeting.* (I just have a pen tho. Hope it has the same effect as a sword)

---------------------------------------------------------

There are other scenarios, but they all end up in me sobbing and/or committing seppuku in/after the meeting so yeah the drama is running high right now.

Who ever come to idea to put JavaScript as backend language is insane.

I am coming from Java and now I am doing some work on Node project and I am loosing my mind.

Everything is an object but you have no idea what are his properties. There are call back, async, sync and mix. I don't even want to try debugging. There is no classes only object and a lot of functions everywhere.

The whole story with Node versions and playing with NVM. Don't even let me talk about Node modules.

Frustration and long development.

Holy pony, writing one monster rant on this site and not coming back

Mother fucking candy crush cunts fucking Microsoft FUCK OFF REPEATEDLY REINSTALLING THIS FUCKING SHIT!!! THREE FUCKING TIMES TODAY I HAVE 'UNINSTALLED' THEM. Yet somehow, they keep FUCKING COMING BACK. not updating, haven't even clicked ok to install them, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO CONTROL MY PC MØRE THAN I DO! FUCK OFF!

The biggest hurdle I overcame on my dev career was coming back to a full time job after a few years spent on a "hippie phase" combining work as an artisan, content developer and editor, and just a few freelance dev jobs. It was all a struggle to start again thinking of myself as "junior again" surrounded by people ten or fifteen years younger than me. But I kept myself over the tidal web and here I am, a Senior again.

The piece of software I'm working on at my job just feels fucking stupid and brainless right now. I know it is not, I know it's working, I know it'll be actually useful to its users but I don't feel like that.
I usually go by telling myself "Most of the time I do like what I do, but sometimes it's just work that has to be done" - but for the last month or so it felt like my motivation is completly drained and not coming back fast enough. Just thinking about it feels like desperate, tired crawling on Legos.

On the other hand, at least I've got some motivation for my studies back which feels great.

I want to write something in PHP.

Yes, coming from me, it sounds like stockholm syndrome, but for me PHP is reminiscent of simpler times.

I want to get a server right where I bought the domain, with CPanel, log in with FTP and ~~push~~ (excuse me, _send_) index.php and other files there. I want to open phpmyadmin and throw some stupid fields together that won't work at scale, but "scale" will never happen.

I want to design websites without normalize.css, without any kind of javascript but some silly UI stuff, I want to send emails with sendmail and not sendgrid. I want my gradient buttons back.

Symphony and Laravel can kiss my ass.

I have some phone interviews coming up next week but I've never had these before. Usually I do online tests, shared code, or in person as I'm deaf.

This time I just want to try using a voice relay, so v basically whatever the person says it's transcribed... So wondering what do you actually talk about in these "quick calls"?

Party of the reason I don't like phone is because there are a lot of technical terms which will probably screw it up... But just wanted to give it a try and not 100% interested this time...

Was intending to, applied, then other things came up so now not so sure, some came back so just gonna wing it for the experience I guess

Interestingly enough, the worst JavaScript code I’ve ever had to deal with was written by back-enders coming from a Java background. The app was unusable and it took me a few weeks to put it back on track.
So is JS the culprit, or is it the elite backend community that fails to even try to make good use of it? 🤡

"Why wait when you can ASYNC ":D

Heard this somewhere long back. Coming back to me now while learning node.

I get back from Christmas vacation. I read all the unread emails and team chats, then go to work on my assigned tickets. As far as I can tell, those tickets are all I need to work on.

Then my boss snaps at me during our team catchup that I'm supposed to be working on a different set of tickets. Which were not visible on the board. Which were not assigned to me. Which nobody on the fucking team bothered to update me on. Of course if I point those out it'll just be a pain to deal with (especially since my boss doesn't seem to have my back, unless he needs something).

I thought my vacation would help me re-energize and get motivated again for this job, but coming back I'm reminded how unhappy I am now here. I've started applying elsewhere, but I don't know if I can continue to put up with this bullshit until I find a new employer.

Any tips or advice from folks who've felt unhappy in their job in the last year?

This is why I stopped using my iPhone. I just reminded myself after coming back from a two week holiday. Here we go e-mail..

"Aww yeah, Bootstrap 4 is coming!"

Shut up bitch! I started 2 years back with web development when I was a noob and since then you are coming.

Coming back to devRant after almost a decade, what did I miss?

First time back to work today after a month long break. It was soul crushing. I don’t know if I’m permanently burnt out or just seriously disenfranchised with the corporate world but I would have thought after a holiday I would be energised and ready to go. It turns out after coming back to work I feel exactly the fucking same! Tired, exhausted, discontent, irritable and most importantly BORED. I am bored spending 8+ hours a day at a computer chair responding to emails and teams messages! Has anyone felt like this before? Did you ever overcome it? I’m worried as I’m getting older I’m losing my love more and more for programming whilst simultaneously hating the concept of work more and more.

Are you.. are you telling me .. that every time ..... every time ..... I've been running ..... npm i something .... it's been putting ^version into my ..... package.json file ?!?!?!?!!? SO THAT IN THE FUTURE WHEN I COME BACK TO THE PROJECT AND DO A FRESH NPM I .... THE VERSIONS WILL ALL UPDATE .... AND THAT'S WHY I'M ALWAYS DEALING WITH BUGS WHEN COMING BACK TO PROJECTS EVEN THOUGH IT WAS WORKING WHEN I LEFT IT A FEW MONTHS AGO.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I was wondering why every time my my code is accessing the !valid() part to later realize I was coming back to it = its state is reset = I need a break T_T

P.S. if you find anything in my code make sure to let me know :)

Getting high during work sounds cool, but once it caused me real trouble.

So, I was just finished with the service I was building and I had files ready to be uploaded on server but I was high at that time and I completely forgot to secure my backend files and BOOM.
Server stopped working. Server support was shocked because overnight we utilized 300GB bandwith .
It was some WORM and it kept coming back.
We were helped in the end though and provided fresh IPs.
P.S. Dont do important stuff when stoned

Had my junior test at work yesterday, and...oh boy. I don't think I've ever been so stressed in my life.

>inb4 "welcome to the real world kid"

Yeah yeah I know but god damn, this was too much. I heard from seniors that you get used to everyday stress, it comes with the job, but junior test ( aka "stress test") is the breaking point for most "new" arrivals.

The test itself tho is not even that hard. Dealing with so much stress and time pressure for the first time is what gets you. Not knowing what happens if you don't pass certainly doesn't help.

I broke down at one point and even after finishing, going home (got no sleep) and coming back today, that feeling of hopelessness is still there.

No real point to this rant, I just needed to vent

Holly shit, they will never understand....

If you come to dev, minding his buissness, writing some code, beeing focused, with headphones on, etc. You absolutely destroy his cache of things in mind, you stay next to him gazing at his screen and throwing away madly words that you need some data extracted from database NOW and you will stay standing next to him gazing when he quickly types few lines of ultra-wide screen of SQL querry with all the fucking joins and shit you wanted with exac aliases you understand and makes one typo but query executes and spits out some data. He didn't notice that something is wrong with it becouse he didn't memorize database's data, and he sends it to you.

Now you are coming back to him pissed and in general fighting mood becouse he did one fucking typo when you was actively pressurizing him to make fucking query faster while you absolutely destroyed his flow of work (in meaning he now needs to dive back into code, figure out why he was editing given file and what was idea for further structure)

Now you are standing again next to him and absolutely pissing him off that he fucked up and made one fucking typpo that unfortnately database didn't say "nope" but it instead spit out wrong data.

If you can relate to "you" stated above, sincerly fuck you.
If you can relate to "he" stated above, I feel ya man, its fucking annoying, isn't it?

I want you all to think back on how "transparent" and "helpful" everyone was to you when you were useful to the company.

And then as soon as you were gone, did they just complain and say something like "how could fullstackclown leave us??!?!?!"

I swear, the last call I was on, I literally heard the phrase "we are such a good team, we think up great MVP products and you guys execute so well"

Let me translate: "we are whimsical fucksticks and you are our slaves to implement it because we ourselves are too incompetent to do it"

Well no more.

Fucking tools, all of them, everyone just wants to use us to get ahead. No competence, no self-understanding, just encapsulate the "IT" or "tEcHiE" people to some department - doesn't even have to even be near us, they can be from any geographic location; they can just be replaced at a moment's notice!

Yeah, well fuck you, because we're growing in skill and understanding, and fighting against you.

Fucking 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡s

The unionized revolution of software developer is coming soon.

!dev, !rant
Was thinking about the things I miss thanks to the 'rona whilst coding. Restaurants are a big one (I haven't had an oyster in a dog's age). We've lost a ton of businesses recently, most of which will never be back. As much as I Uber eats and doordash, restaurants lose money on those mechanisms frequently due to the up to 30% order commission.

There's definitely a potential market for an epic games-store style player in that segment who wants to compete on cost and fees. Hard part would be the political weight that's coming down on those businesses now. It's a really shitty time to be in most businesses.

Tl;Dr There will never be a better name for a donut shop than "Hole Foods." RIP

After a long break for studies, I'm finally gonna continue working on my game engine. Wish me good luck.😃😃

My boss is cheap so:

- My machine randomly crashing
- Internet disconnecting

On another note:

- Clients calling every 5 minutes instead of putting together a list and coming back when they have more than one point at a time

!Rant
Looking at various Devs & non-devs like myself, ranting, posting meme's [my bad];
I realised why we keep coming back. Nope not because of the notifications, but because devRant feels like home dare I say it, it feels like family.
Thank you @dfox @trogus & the other creators who aren't that famous [my bad I don't remember your names].

Thank you.

A co-worker shared his wisdom with me today:
"It's okay for your job to be the side quest of your story, just don't forget the main quest"

And I'm left thinking, that's deep as shit, but if my track record in Skyrim is anyting to go by I'm fucked.

At least the easter holidays are coming up. Back to the main quest :D

There’s literally poor people dying of COVID because they can’t get beds and my bosses are sharing shitposts on LinkedIn about fun “coming back to work games”

How can I just "chill"?!

Our project's demo is coming up soon and since we there only two in the team we have to work together.

I did all the coding and my so-called "team mate" just watched behind my back or refreshed the git!!!!

And we get the same pay. 😧😤

F.M.L.

Coming back to c++ after far too long in python...

Compiler: "Do you even know what a semicolon is?!"

Coming back to C++ after working in modern js-land for two years. Actually feels super sweet. I've missed overthinking everything.

I've decided to take a look at flutter today and boy... I must say I hate writing layout for it.
Not cause of all those margin thing no.. It's just too verbose, awful.
I don't want to spend that much time writing the UI, I want to focus on the logic.
Even XML was better than that.

I think I'll wait for a layout editor before coming back to it.

But I have to admit that hot reload is really nice after spending so much time waiting for my builds on Android 😓

I am so fucking tired of sitting here all day every day adjusting paddings and margins. Oh fucking hurr durr you got one of the millions of fucking elements to not overflow on your page, well does it work on *this* resolution and *this* orientation? No, well fix that and then go back and fix what it breaks.

I swear to God I never want to touch fucking CSS again it's all I've done for a yesr and it is driving me up the god damn wall. This is my career, I shouldn't fucking dread coming in to work because I know how much bullshit I'll have to deal with. It's awful.

I don't get how anyone has good looking complicated pages that just look good on every possible resolution, it's fucking mind boggling that anyone can sit there and adjust heights and widths and paddings and margins and floats for hours on end nonstop just watching shit get broken and fixed and broken and fixed and AHHHHH

I need a fucking smoke and a pint just so I don't have to think about this anymore

Right,i consider myself a pretty damn good dev... I can back up everything I say to prove that I'm right on not lying to clients

But I see all these devs who do lie... Who withold data from clients cause it's not great.

And I go to clients and prove that they are lying not doing it right.

But I know saying to them... Oi your current devs are shit fire them ... Isn't a good way to get them as a client

Me and my company are open and honest ... we go all out on all of our projects. I work nonstop. It is seriously baffling the kind of developers are out there and how bad they can be I'm... Seriously just.... Urgh 😖

How should I go about talking to clients without going ... Fire them quick or saying that in a ... More humble respectful way...

I need more clients ... To survive and I don't mind coming across as a dick as long as they understand what's going on and that they are people ripped off by these asshole devs

Just bought the pathfinder starter pack for some dev friends over at the office. The nerd cave is finally coming back!

Email from client: "help! I'm updating my content but it's not showing up on the website! What's wrong?"

A couple of emails back and forth and decide it would be easier to go find out what's up in person, seeing how she's in the same building but downstairs.

"So what's the problem?" I ask
"Oh I figured it out myself. I remembered when you gave me the training that there's two steps to the process but forgot the second one"
"Second one?" I ask (you click update and voila)
"Yeah I forgot after you click update you have to refresh the page, thanks for coming down to help though"
Me: 😑😑😑😑

Damn i want to make an Alarm to alert me when Gradle is finished building.

When waiting gradle build i always get mad because sometime i always left it to do something else and then forgot about it and ended up coming back with more wasted time.

Did my first meaningful work in angular in many moons at work today - also apparently the first time I've touched it in 4 major version releases lol.

I typically find myself specializing in API and service architecture lately, so I was pleasantly surprised at how quickly I got back into the swing of things with the front end in general. Granted the app itself has been very neatly organised and written which goes a very long way to helping one find their way quickly.

That said, I really can't admit to having any desire to stay working in angular for very long. Yes, I think it speaks well to the framework itself that I can pick up immediately going from version 8 to 12 without any issue, but also, I think angular kinda sucks ass*.

* Opinion should be taken with a grain of salt coming from a .NET dev. This does not reflect the views of .NET or other devs in general. User results may vary.

I just found out our junior dev has not been reading any of her e-mails coming from JIRA.

So when her tickets were being pushed back / commented on, she had no idea.

Pokemon go is down so I'm coming crawling back... can I come back to devrant? please accept me (until the servers are back)

Usual python code problems coming from someone who has been coding in Javascript and PHP (<--no pitchforks please). It's been months already but old habits still keep on coming back
- adding a semi-colon
- mixing spaces with tabs
- using a lowercase boolean
- adding an open brace when declaring a function
- forgetting the colon ( ;'s brother)

I label all packages I know are coming as being for a company: Derp Industries. This is from an old in-joke between my friends and I. This tells me whether a package was something I ordered or not from the label (as I often forget I have a package coming.) However, I just got a call from a DHL driver asking me how long we'll be open. I, uh... I told him we close at 8. He said that's perfect, as he has to pick up from the local holding station at 5 and i'm his first stop.

I'm tempted to call back and tell him I'm just a dude living in a trailer...

!dev
Sometimes life just cracks its knuckles and goes like, yeah let's just fuck this guy inside out.
Everyday is a battle. Cockroaches are my worst fear. Like Orwell's Room no. 101 level fear. My tiny student residence room has so many that I'm sick of killing them. And they just keep coming back.
My worst sorrow is lonliness. I'm the kind of person who's fairly independant and level headed but I just love the feeling of having close ones around. So much that it's a part of my existence and identity. And sadly, that's just not there right now.
My worst misery is unproductivity. Not working on something useful always makes me feel guilty. But all the stress and responsibilities and the above mentioned problems leave me with little mental room to do what I like unless I put in a lot of conscious effort into it which drains me.
Despite all this, I stay happy. I smile at the end of the day and I'm fucking proud of it.

Last few months have been quite calm. Nothing to really rant about. The egocentric asshole PM (see my past rants) left the company, so things have been better at work. I thought that there would be so much chaos because of all the roles that he had (project manager, engineering manager, lead developer, dev ops) but we managed to keep things running smoothly, which shouldn't have been a surprise for me, but I was a bit scared at first. Relieved, because well... the egocentric asshole left, but a bit scared either way. Anyway, everything has been fine. I'm pretty much the lead frontend developer now, even tho there's no official structure or hierarchy, everyone just keeps looking up to me for help and guidance. I've received a good pay raise. Work has been interesting and challenging. All's well.

This all coincided with me deciding to take a little break from devrant, and the lack of ranting material kept me from coming back. I just dropped by to say hello and check how devrant is going. I hope you are all doing well :)

It seems being your own boss (on side projects) isn't much better... keep telling myself to "add just one more feature" , "make a slight improvement"

Well there goes the whole morning... which I was supposed to spend doing other stuff....

In fact I told myself and everyone I was done a few days ago... but it keeps coming back...

Hey everyone! This is a long one so get comfy~

TLDR; I'm glad to be back in the presence of all you awesome people. 2019 was a dream and I have a lot of you to thank for that.

If you've noticed, I've been away for a while. I took a sabbatical from a lot of my socials (including github - or at least public github :( this summer. Let me explain:

In late April/early May, I applied and got an internship at RBC (a big bank company in Canada) found out I'm getting flown out to San Fran for a talk I gave at a summit, and got accepted to this 2 week physics [Quantum Cryptography] camp @ UWaterloo. So I had quiet the summer. In order to throw myself into work and friends and all that, I decided that I was going to take a break. Although I took a break from Github I was still active on Github Enterprise for my job but outside of that I didn't do much.

Don't worry though, now that it's fall/winter season, I'll be in my room for way too long so it's back to the usual grind. Currently, I'm in the process of planning a hackathon, prepping for picoCTF 2019, filling out University applications, all while dealing with school :) I've got a lot of projects/things coming up so ya'll will hear more from me :D

So I started to hear a noise on my headphones which I didn't know where it was coming from. It wasn't much of a noise but a regular sequence of "beeps", seemed like 8bit sfx. So I started moving my cable around and it turns out that if I put the headphone's cable under my phone at a specific spot I can hear the noise. Seems like some kind of interference, so the first thing that I thought of is the NFC sensor. So I remembered that an app would detect my credit card (which has NFC) if it was close to the back of my phone, so I put on my headphones and put the cable between the phone and the credit card and voila, the sound changes. It only works if the headphones are be plugged in though.

Idk why but it think this is really cool. Just wanted to share :)

Working with a vendor's api. Every call is coming back error. Emails back and forth for two weeks, sending logs, changing settings, encoding urls...

From them: oh, this field needs to be unique.

Me: how are you just now catching that?!

The doc showed it to be a specific value. We must be their first client or something.

i hate this fucking life so much why do i have to fucking exist WHAT IS THE FUCIJG POINT OF DOING SOMETHING YOU HATE WITH PASSION DOIMG AND NOT DOING WHAT U WANT TO BE DOING I DO NOT UNDERSTA D THIS LIFE

THIS existence/life is the Biggest BITCH i have ever fucking met FUCK YOU

CANNOT BE SUCCESSFUL DOING SOMETHING YOU HATE.

there was a philosopher who said "this life is pain and the only purpose of living is to reduce this pain as much as possible in order to be more happy" WHAT THE FCUK THAT IS MORE DEPRESSING THAN HAVING A FKIG CANCER

WHY DONT I JUST GET SOME INCURABLE DISEASE INSTEAD OF LIVING? OR GET HIT BY A CAR?

WhAT

I AM SO FUCKING NOT IN THE MOOD FOR ANYTHING

WHAT

as i was writing this rant by coming back from ffffffftffffffffffFFFfFFFfFFFFCKING college i went into a bus and there was a woman in front of me with an english text on the back of her shirt saying "she believed she could so she did. she designed a life she loved." WHAT

YO WHAT

THIS WAS PUT IN FRONT OF MY FACE AT RANDOM SPONTANEOUSLY

DID GOD JUST GIVE ME A FKIG SIGN OR SOMETHING?? "MY LIFE SUCKS RIGHT NOW BUT I CAN TURN IT INTO THE LIFE I LOVE" IS THAT WHAT A HIGHER SPIRITUAL BEING IS TRYING TO TELL ME RIGHT NOW???

WHAT IS THIS

HOW DO I FEEL RIGJT NOW

I DONT GET IT

MHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hh

I have a junior friend living in same building where I used to live. I used to help him in small doubts related to college and in some random stuff.

I once typed an application in a language which does not have its fonts in ms word by default. I used Google typing tools and Google docs to type and format it. I even taught him the process which is easy to understand.

Out of blue, after few years, this SOB pings me today and asks same thing to do again since it's urgent. I told him that I am middle of something and told him to use same tools as I used and give it a try. This fucker says he forgot how to do it. Well no problems, I told him how to do it and I will not be able to do it for him right now.
He said then try doing it after coming back to home.

Mind you that he is an engineering student.
You asshole, if it is so much urgent then use your brain and figure out this small thing yourself. If you can wait till I come back home then in which fucking way it's urgent? Go fuck yourself. I am done with your shitty attitude and on next offense you are going on my block list.

Coming back home to find out that my parents switched to optical fiber and can download with 50MB/s WiFi speeds makes me feel sad to go back to my 15MB/s campus speed. Even more when I go to Germany.

in my country, we will be having a 2 day Muslim holiday. I have mapped out all the programming tasks I need to attend to during those days and thinking of staying back at the office but my gf is thinking of coming over. this will mean not achieving all the tasks which is a problem as I Dont know when next such holiday will be.

how best do I tell her not to come?

I keep taking breaks from what I'm working on coming back and adding more spaghetti on top of the spaghetti because if I start rewriting the spaghetti I get in a cycle of rewriting spaghetti several times and getting nowhere

Why am I so indecisive =-=

But also I think I might have to rewrite the spaghetti again. Can my opinions stop changing pls

I work in huge corporation. Got an offer for smaller company and gave 2 week notice. My corporation offered me better base salary and retention bonus to stay. I accepted (mistake) and now they are not coming back with retention bonus or salary increase. I found out they did same trick with different person. Wtf... huge corporation is doing those kind of shenanigans?

Yesterday night!

Yeah it was Saturday night but not for me. I was at bus stop and my jiofi device was in back pocket and after some time I was coming back to my room and thinking let's switch on wifi. After that my mobile was not connected to jiofi so I thought may be jiofi out of charged. Later on when I was checking in my pocket I realize that I missed it on bus stop!

Actually this jiofi device is my first salary's garbage:D

That's why I was little bit worried.

So I went back to stop and saw nothing was there. Disappointed but wait, suddenly devRant notification came and mobile vibrated so I checked and I seen that my mobile connected to jiofi and then I checked carefully, it was there!

Actually jiofi was placed in opposite face so that light was not visible but I got my jiofi back.

Thank you devRant notification:D

If the christian god exists, then I'll go to hell because of my sexual orientation. Little do they know, as I wake up there, I'll make two steps back to pick up a chainsaw. It's there and I know it.

Dear god, watch out. Your days are numbered. I'll make Nietzsche "god is dead" stuff look like a fucking joke.

I'm coming for you.

All this suffering in hope of a free US trip.

It was a horrible day today..

By afternoon, my eyes were stressed and my head was feeling like exploding and i had this rage against everything. I guess my BP was rising. I think this work life is taking a toll on my health.

I felt guilty doing this to myself.

As a cherry on top, on my 1 hr commute back to home, the only available seat in the bus was beside a drunk guy. I didn't give a fuck about that and choose to take that seat. He was blabbering, singing and falling off from the seat often. Everyone staring at me for daring enough to sit beside him, probably thinking I'm crazy. I'm just glad he didn't became violent, i would have lost my control otherwise.

I think I'm not made for working for other people's ideas.

But this job will decrease likelihood of my US visa application getting rejected.

I'm planning to resign from my 9 to night work life after coming back from this upcoming US trip.

The old trend of writing utility classes all over the place is coming back. Kill me now.

I can’t believe I am getting closer to 2000 upvotes after only 2 months of coming back.

Thank you for the support!

So this company called me for an internship interview. They told me to learn a new framework and develop an entire system with it within a week so as to get a chance for the internship. Jokes on you. I ain't coming back you SHITHOLES.

I guess my story is not really cool, but okay, I lost my job as a Digital designer (Yeah, I actually have a bachelor's degree in graphic design, I'm an impostor)

I lost it because I saved enough money to travel to Japan and I wanted to stay at least a month so the company didn't like it. after coming back I got a job as a content editor, I just copied old content from an old website to a new one, basic html and css, not even responsive design, then I got really into it, and bootstrap came along, the company opened a new department "Front End" so I got in, I learnt responsive design and Jquery, really loved it, I went back to Japan for a month and a half, keeping my job, I liked it, but I quit.

I now work as a remote front end and I feel stuck, I'm very comfortable as remote, don't wanna go back to an office, but it seems I'll have to, can't find any opportunities to improve remotely, and I feel like I'm missing what the "cool kids" are doing.

I don't know how this happened but this is how apples panorama picture works :D

while saving this file on my pc because on my phone I had connectivity issues, my laptop had a blue screen. Coming back from nature, I see how much MOMO missed me..

Havent been home for 24h. Now im coming back home and i can't explain how much shit im holding in. Im gonna explode and drop that fresh smelly shit and nuke the whole house

Flash back to when The old mouses had the trackballs in them, pulled the mouse apart and pulled the trackball out 🙃

Coming back to recent times, myself and a work mate printed off small troll faces and stuck them to the bottom of the laser mouses around the office huehue

!rant
Health.

This is a big thing I think. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm overweight and this job keeps me at a desk for long periods of time.

I ended up with health issues from a combination of a bad diet, a staph infection years ago, and not being active. So I've made a commitment to start walking - at least a mile a day.

I'm using Pacer + Apple Health on iOS to track my progress. So far, combined with a $50 bluetooth scale I picked up on Amazon, I'm losing weight. I also noticed that when I switched my mile walk to my lunch break, I'm coming back to my work way more refreshed.

I hope to keep this up and I've found the gamification of having apps track my progress is a definite plus.

Anyone else have any healthy habits of "health hacks" they've found?

fucking permissions

I wrote a whole custom node js project because an exec wanted to see this tool work a certain way, I’m an iOS dev but I got it done the day he asked, and when I went to push it I realized I didn’t have the right account permissions. This service has “add-on roles” for accounts and I’ve had to ask for them before, so I went to that guy and he never responded. Then he went on vacation.

This morning I mentioned it in standup and my lead recommended I reach out to his boss, which sounded great bc we have an even better rapport than I do with the other guy.

His boss first said “that sounds reasonable” and then proceeded to TALK HIMSELF OUT OF IT and tell me to either find someone else to upload it for me or sit on it til the other guy gets back from vacation.

Does this ever end? Bc I used to chalk it up to first-year dev probs but we’re coming up on 5 years now and I don’t know what I did to deserve this torture

Didn't go to work today because of commuting issues.

It's fucking night and I'm receiving notification of boss sending me photo on messenger. back to back.

I haven't opened the app yet and I'm legit scared if it has anything to do with me not coming to work.

Or even worse nudez.

:/

F*ck Apple. WatchOs 4 is a downgrade! On first apple watch the system runs half the speed. The music app is now shit, because I can only play music downloaded on the 2gb apple watch. Seriously wtf? Maybe I have more music than 2gb. There new design of the app slowed the app down to 15 fps...
The story watch face is complete crap it shows all the time only "Good morning, name".

The worst is I can't go back to the watchOS 3 which was so many times better...

And you still have this bug that pisses me off since watch OS 1 you can hear every sounds coming from your watch with your Bluetooth headphones, but not calls.
You have to hear the call with the apple watch speakers when you don't want to buy airpods.
In other words the function is useless.
And it's one of the most important.

Pls apple why has every watchOS update have to be an downgrade...

And I don't have any chance to get off of this version unlike with iOS.

I hate Intellij so much ...
* it has the weirdest bugs
* like window focus not working properly,
weird comment/uncomment short (jumps one line down wtf)
* It is slow as hell
* doesn't compile properly (or doesn't give a shit telling me about its actual status).
* Not even the build log is working properly. Why can I hide WARNs but no INFOs?? WTF
* Panels are all over the place and keep coming back, regardless how often I close them ....

ARG ARG ARG, *smashing face on the keyboard*

and the worst ... even though I have the F***ING ULTIMATE version, it constantly nags me about BUYING THE F***NG ULTIMATE VERSION AAAAAARG

Found the sky melting while coming back from swimming​ practice.It was so awesome and I clicked this 😥

One month ago, two tickets were opened by two different people for the same bug.

I picked the one with the most informations and rejected the other by giving the ID of the other ticket, and then assigned it to the person who opened the ticket.

Today, I see that ticket coming back to me, with the status back to Open, and the comments "The ID given is this ticket's ID!"
I mean, yes, I did a typo and typed a 5 instead of a 6.
They could, like, test to see if it was patched (been one month), or contact me by mail or Skype to ask me if I didn't make a typo in the comments, but no, they decided to reopen the ticket for this.

Thanks.

I upgraded a Linux server one time and data that was serialized in yaml stopped being parsed properly.

It turns out the libyaml people decided to change how hashes were handled, which made any previous hashes come back as blank.

A whole database of valid data in dev was coming back invalid in prod. It was maddening.

It took a day to figure out the problem and how to update the data to the new format in rails.

I now serialize in json.

I officially gave up on this semester of college! ✨🍻🎉
I'm coming back next year, but until then, I'm glad to disappoint my family

Took week off work. Didn't do shit on my projects. Just played Skyrim and became and ultra wealthy merchant than raises people from the dead. Found a mod that let me manage up to 512 corpses so they won't despawn. Placed a bunch of dead people in Dragons Reach to traumatize Balgruf's children. I put a fucking dead mammoth and giants in there! lol. Now I want to make some plugins for Skyrim written in C++. Been wanting a generic networking plugin. Guess I should have done that last week. I keep thinking of things I want to do in Skyrim I cannot do. Helps me make my list of features for my own games.

I avoided devrant all last week. I lurked a couple of times, but didn't really participate. Hung out with family and killed stuff in game.

Last night I air fried some leftover turkey using onion dip, fried onions, and a little bit of flour. Turned out really well.

I feel pretty good after just doing mindless shit for a week and hanging with family. Got another week coming up in December. Need to work on side projects though. I actually want to program stuff now. Was getting so I didn't want to look at code before.

What do I see when I get back? @retoor is a new user and has an alt that is a bot too. Did anybody die? Did anyone come back to life? What the fuck is wrong with you people? (retoorical question I know).

That moment when you realize that the annoying beeping sound I was hearing while dreaming was the sound of my server's UPS discharging itself because the power went out. I woke up to the electricity coming back not understanding what is happening 😂

I used to work for a consultancy that specialised in a very niche area (I won't say what – this is traceable enough already!). We charged our clients a very high hourly rate, because demand and supply. All the time I'd get calls like the following:
"Please could you just make this small change to the deployment?"
"Yes, of course. You don't have any contract hours left, so I'll just forward you to our billing department so you can sort out the payment first"
"Ah okay, please can you tell us how to do it"
[Even if I explained it, you wouldn't be able to do it – that's why you're coming to us.]
"...or better yet, just do it as a quick fix outside of work?"
[So... work for no pay? No thanks.]

While my company always had my back on these requests (obviously, they wanted payment too), they were so frequent that I got sick of it.

Former android fan, I’ve been using iPhone SE for a while, and now I’m ready to give feedback. We are talking about brand new, iOS 11.2.2 device, never jailbraked (jailbroken?) or made anything fucked up to.

The main problem is battery life. It’s poor. I mean, my cheap ass Meizu m3s stands for about three times longer. Now I always need to carry power bank or charger around, keeping it up from one outlet to another.

iOS 11 is unstable and flawed. Music widget on lock screen freezes randomly, ui falls apart sometimes, apps sometimes start in landscape mode. I never found android ui falling apart, just like webpage marked up by interns.

Transferring files to Linux PC is huge pain in the ass. Nuff said.

Aaaand... that’s all. There is literally only three problems present.

On the other hand, there is huge advantages over android:

Speed. It’s unbeatable. It’s absolutely stunning. Need camera? Here it is, quarter second away. Android camera needed straight 15 seconds to start up. Taking picture? Here it is, flawless as always. Zero motion blur, gamma is ideal, focus is so sharp so you may hurt your eyes. Need 100 pictures? Here you go, just press the button and hold it. Maybe s9 or another shiny ass android takes pictures as fast as iPhone, but I bet my iPhone will be taking pictures same flawlessly after 5 years, while your android will probably become sluggish ass piece of crap.

Not. A. Single. Fucking. Lag.

Asphalt 8? 60 FPS all the way down. 2GIS? Fraction of a second away. That’s it, that’s how it have to be.

Sound quality. Just as neat as my Sansa Clip. EarPods are crap, so I’m using my SE215. Not going to ever come back to Sansa. Xperia TX had much less quality audio btw.

Apps. As long as the whole enterprise world sucking Apple’s dick, apps are running silky smooth and the things are not going to change. Come on. Apple is the king nowadays, admit it or not.

Keyboard is amazing. Screen is amazing. It’s just that pleasing. The sounds iPhone makes are great, while android sounds piss me off and making me hold myself from throwing the phone straight to the wall.

iPhone makes me feel cared about. Everything is on it’s place, everything fits perfectly. You are watching YouTube, you need to adjust volume and volume bar appears as tiny strip on the very top, just to not distract you. Make screenshot, draw something on it, share and hit delete. Every action you need is one tap away. Look up word? One tap away. Position the cursor between words? Polished as fuck, here you go, have your handy magnifying glass. Adblock in safari? Install it from the App Store and it will be literally two taps away, right at the settings. No VPN needed. Safari doesn’t become slow with Adblock, it’s just the same amazingly fast browser, but without ads. And Apple Music is just one dollar a month for students, filled with high quality songs.

Even google apps working better on iOS.

The advantages are clear for me, while downsides aren’t significant. @irene, you wanted to know what I’ll tell after a while, so I’m saying it proudly:

I’m never ever coming back to android.

I just rebooted my server by accident because I wanted to play Space Engineers.

Long story short, dual booting. Needed to boot into windows. Typed reboot into my terminal. My terminal was not local. When am I finally getting around to set up my terminal color as red when it is connected to another host?

But two things are good here. This was my own server.. Well, bunch of stuff is running on it, including for my bachelor's thesis. But if that was a server of my company, that would have been worse.

Second thing, my systems are fault tolerant. I reboot once per week at the latest and for systems with fail overs once per day. I know they are coming back up. I don't worry. My Gitlab will be back in 5 minutes at the latest. I am going to reboot and play Space Engineers now.

Reboot your servers guys. Only way to make sure they'll survive reboots!

Good old dear me sitting comfortably and writing some code...
Suddenly, the doorbell rings!!!
"One moment! Coming!", I shout...
I proceed going to the hall, take the keys from the table right next to me and I unlock the door...
I open it and there's only thin air in front me. Downstairs I hear the building door closing and the elevator working its way up, higher than my floor...
I close the door and I go back to my desk, resuming my work and thinking:
"I don't know who are, I don't care who you are, but I will find you and I will make you pay..."

Now my coding train of thought has stopped! Thanks, unknown doorbell ringer!!!

So today was a normal day at the office. My brain stopped functioning after helplessly trying to debug ES6 code for IE 11. So I put my headphones on and went to the loo. (Mind you my headphones have a heavy bass, so they are quite larger than other traditional headphones.)

As I was coming back to my desk, my project manager laughed, pointing to my headphones, and said, "What are these?"

"Headphones!", I said, silently judging him.

He said, "Can't you even put those down for two minutes? You wear them even in the loo!"

Baffled by his utmost stupid sentence, I did the most obvious thing, ignore him.

After about 10 minutes, the manager came to my desk and said, "See, when you walk around with these headphones, people get 'distracted' and are unable to work. So I'd suggest you wear them while still on your seat and remove them when you have to leave the seat. Even the clients might think of you as a weird guy. Okay?"

And I couldn't do anything. I just sat there, nodded and went back to work.