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Another dev on my team just got a new machine. Before he came in today I made two separate USB installers and left him these notes.
60 -
Dear team,
Train people well enough so they can leave
Treat them well enough so they don't want to
Regards,
A member of dev team2 -
Design team: "Is it okay if I put this here?"
Me: "No, it's not okay if you put that there."
Design team: "Are you sure? It'd be really cool if I could put that there."
Me: "No, I will need to fuck with a lot of things if you put that there, just put it in the bootstrap columns."
Design team: "Hold on, lemme see if it's okay to put that there."
Lead-dev: "He's right, you shouldn't put that there."
Company: "We should have a meeting to discuss where the design team can and can't put things."
Lead-dev: "Just put the things in the middle and devide them in these twelve columns on seperate rows, 'kay?"
Company: "Okay, the design team will now put the thing in those things, right design team?"
Design team: "Yes, we agree to putting the thing where we should put the thing."
Me: "So where do you want the thing now?"
Design team: "I want it all the way to the right, outside of the container, that'd look cool."
Me: "Fuck you."22 -
Project handover:
"Mmh okay, so what about test coverage?"
Dev: "zero"
Team taking the project "why???"
Dev: "You don't need test if you write perfect code"
Silence in the room... Followed by awkward laugh.18 -
Nobody:
Senior frontend Dev at my company: "microservices best thing ever"
Also him: "Relational databases gonna die"
Also him (talking to the DB team): "You're gonna dissapear, Mongo is the future"
Me: "Eh... Dude, Mongo is still a database.."
Him: "Microservices"
Send help...27 -
If only more manager would think like this! Constant interruptions are poison to the performance of any dev team.
4 -
Costumer: I found a 40 line python script on Stackoverflow to do that.
Dev team: ok, now... how many lines you think we will need to put the python interpreter, libraries and your 40 line script inside an Android and iOS apps with legacy code?3 -
Senior Dev: "Be mindful of what you email to the team, some may be rubbed the wrong way."
Me: "I'm going on a year, I figured it was okay to send a meme when appropriate like [the other guy]."
Senior Dev: "Well, [the other guy] has been here for 17 years, so it's sort of expected from him."
Me: "You know what would be weird? If I was here for 17 more years and then 'started' having fun with the team."
Senior Dev: "Yes, but [the other guy] is the only one doing his particular job, which makes him important, so he tends to get away with more."
Me: "No, I get it. If you're a linchpin you can reply with cat memes, but people like me need to mind their place."
Senior Dev: "It's an uncomfortable conversation, but it's all bureaucracy."
Me: "Duly noted. But could you please forward me the specific email I sent that caused the concern?"
Senior Dev: "I'm not sure what the exact email was, when it was sent, or specifically whom it offended."
Me: "Okay, because that would be like me walking up to you and saying that you have a problem that needs to be fixed, but I don't know what your problem is or why it needs to be addressed."
Senior Dev: "You're right, but just be mindful of the emails you send outside of the group."
Me: "I've never group-emailed anything outside of the team."
Senior Dev: "Well, I'll let you get back to work..."
[FML!] 🤦♂️8 -
So I moved from being the TL of a small team to a member of another team a month ago.
A dev from the old team sent me this today morning. He also sent some examples of what he found "cool", and tbh I'm pretty proud of those modules. I tried being very modest there, but I'm very happy 😅
8 -
What non-dev team members don't understand is that when we tell them to wait while we're coding, we actually don't ignore them but try to finish the code before we forget what were we typing.1
-
Latest from my team,
One of the Dev copied code from a stackoverflow question.
Got same exception as highlighted in the question and started complaining that his code does not work.3 -
when your boss tells you they hired you just to save money, and the job should actually be done by a team of intermediate/senior devs, but they thought one junior dev could do it in the same time span
4 -
Project Leader: the team needs to use Git
Dev team: yeah Git, it will help us a lot
.
.
.
[three days later]
Dev: we send the changes via Dropbox, see you on monday!
7 -
When the Sales team fucks up something, they point finger at each other for the blame.
When the Dev Team fucks up something, as a Senior Developer I say to my Boss that we fucked it up no matter whose fault it is and we will fix it up by x time.
When the SysAdmin team fucks. The Dev Team is to blame.
Sorry guys, I got a bit frustrated. All our servers wasn't backed up from last week and the SysAdmin guys are saying it's our fault.
What the fuck is going on? fuck you fuck fuck fuck fuck...9 -
Dev from other team asked me for a code I had previously written. I emailed it.
Dev: Thanks, I received it but am not able to open the .py file
Me: Try using Microsoft Word.12 -
“Your time zone is not my concern” - manager of the backend team
I asked if there’s another way for us to get test data into QA. That doesn’t involve us staying on until 9pm to get a backend dev to modify the db manually, everyday.6 -
My first job was at a web agency. Non tech background, trying to transition into tech through frontend. Month 1: graphic designer, month 2: CSS guy, month 3: UI guy, month 4: in the frontend team doing react, month 7: leading the team, also doing some rails backend, month 9: full stack, month 11: leading web team.
How? Everyone else in the dev team left at month 7 lol. Literally thrown into the middle of the rainforest, fighting bugs by myself. But became so good at debugging and learning on the spot. Left at month 12 for a better job.1 -
This just in everyone...
Android Dev: *sent and email to network admin* can you please unblock github for a few mins.
Network admin: *Replied* Can you take a screenshot whats the error your getting.
Android Dev: *Replied with screenshot* "Failed to load resource: the server responded with a status of 503 (Service Unavailable)"
Network admin: that is a known issue. *Replied with Wordpress Links.
Android Dev: why is github working outside our network then?
Network admin: there must be a problem with your code that needs to be tweaked.
Team: *FACE PALM*5 -
Seniors: Welcome to the team. Feel free to ask anything if you need help. There is no such thing as stupid questions.
New Dev: Sure. Thanks.
*a few minutes later*
New Dev: How to comment a code?
Seniors: Google it....and please don't ask stupid questions.11 -
Dear backend dev:
No data is not an error for fuck sake. Don't want 404, or messages if the search criteria filters out all values. Give me a empty array.
Is this hard to understand that we need a team meeting to discuss?
Godamit12 -
CEO had a meeting with the Dev team today and it went a little like this..
CEO: You guys shouldn't be doing any Googling. You should know everything about building websites.
Me(in my head of course): GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!7 -
!rant
I complained during a dev team review about the too many dev calls/meetings we have that are supposed to improve our productivity but instead feel like interrupting our work and line of thoughts when focusing on something.
I expected the team lead to bash me or say "Nooo, these meetings are important bla bla bla" but he received it quite positively and already changed how we do things.
3 -
With only a developer team of two people dev rant sees more updates in a week, than Facebook's Windows apps see in a month.11
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A day before the deadline.
Project manager decides that we are ready to publish the same app with the iPad version too. Without asking dev team.
+Yep, sure. What could go wrong?
I'll keep you posted.2 -
*team convo*
Dev: We will create another branch for the changes and merge them when required.
Director: Can we not do the changes in the current branch and comment them out until required? I think that’s cleaner and not confusing in my opinion.
Beautiful mf!6 -
You know scrum is working when the dev team are feeling that scrum isn't working because they have nothing to do because the product team can't keep up with the pace.4
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When the whole dev team desperately tries to convince the boss to get Linux on the new servers instead of windows.6
-
If you wanna replace few of the carousel banners in your website, at least fucking send me the image with the same aspect ratio or resolution compared to the old images.
WHY THE FUCK YOU WANNA BLAME THE DEV TEAM WHEN YOUR GRAPHIC TEAM AND YOUR MARKETING TEAM IS SHIT?5 -
So I quit my job and am currently serving my notice period. I do the hiring for my team (lead dev). Today I got an email from a recruiter trying to recruit me for my current role ....6
-
Adventures in security land, part II:
I’m getting pulled off the security review team and instead relegated to part-time security tickets alongside my usual dev work. (So, someone else finds them, i fix them.)
Guess I found and debated too many problems with the lead dev’s code. 🙄13 -
Client informs dev team that he is upgrading all his machines from IE8 to IE11.
~700 lines of hacky js and css previously commented as "//Workaround for IE" removed.
Pure satisfaction.6 -
I learned a valuable lesson today about the life of a manager. I’m not a manager, but I am a senior level dev.
Today I was told there wasn’t room on the new team for 1 person, and I had pick that last team member. I had to choose between a friend who really isn’t cut out to be a dev and a non friend who is a better dev.
I talked through my reasoning and ultimately chose to put the friends job in jeopardy. They told me that I had solid leadership traits for being able to separate my emotions from my decision making. But I felt like a piece of shit.
I cried back at my desk. The friend doesn’t know yet and I can’t tell them. Is this what execs feel when they have to let people go?11 -
PM: hows the android app going?
Android Dev: gradle downloading... blocked by network admin.
PM: anyway how is the iOS app going?
iOS Dev: cocoapods downloading... blocked by network admin.
PM: ... i guess the only thing running now is the web admin right?
Laravel/VueJS Dev: composer nodejs/npm/yarn downloading... blocked by network admin.
PM: team lets retest the api endponts
Team: Postman downloading... blocked by network admin.
Team: -_- Insomnia REST Client downloading... blocked by network admin.
PM: code study?
Team: even visual studio code/android studio/xcode is blocked. :(
.... sad dev life
anyone here with the same problem?14 -
It today's team meeting my manager asked, "What is GitHub?"
Seven years leading the group. Hired with no dev knowledge. Can't be bothered to acquire any.14 -
Do not hire a team of full stack developers such that the entire teams' core competency is back-end development and then wonder why they can't hurry the fuck up to design and build usable, device-friendly interfaces.
Hire a damned front-end dev.1 -
Client : We need this feature
Team lead : Sure, we will deliver this to you in 3 days.
Meanwhile Teamlead forgets to work on it or assign it to anyone in the team while he was surrounded by many other tasks.
Client on 2nd day morning : What's the progress on that feature?
Teamlead to Client: It's going fine, we will deliver it to you on time.
Meanwhile, Teamlead to a junior developer in the team (on 2nd day afternoon): We have this priority feature where we need to finish it in one day and deliver it tomorrow!
Junior Dev to Teamlead : This is too much of work to complete it in 1 day, it atleast needs 3 days!
Teamlead to Junior dev : I don't care, can't talk, busy, just complete the work and deal with the client, bye.
And the Junior dev continues to struggle where he is unknown of the fact that the task actually was of 3 days but just because the Teamlead forgot to do the task and also to assign the task early, he is in trouble!9 -
So he is in the “elite” team as a “Sr” dev and i’m in the normal team as a ssr dev.
He: Hey look, the ‘F’ case is empty and doesn’t return anything, can you help me? This is some old code and we have to add some features.
Code:
Switch(string) {
case “J”:
case “F”:
cade “D”:
// some code
break;
// more code
}
I’m crying9 -
Me currently listing to the dev team what the fuck is going wrong with their website after testing it
1 -
Hire a separate team to implement what the dev did and see them fail miserably.
Then ask the dev for the source code and try to adapt the original solution to your own needs, and, ofc, fail at that too.
Then keep your pride high and not ask the dev to help you
Boosts self-confidence every time :)4 -
During QA for a huge project when our dev team was confident of the stability of the project, We started introducing small bugs, QA team use to raise bugs in Jira, we marked them as not reproducible.
Frustrated QA started coming to our cubes - at this point dev team worked in a perfect coordination like a man to man marking in hockey. While one dev asked QA guy to reproduce the bug in front of him while the other dev has already fixed it.
Continued for a couple of days till our team lead was satisfied with the revenge. -
When new developers join in your team, please make a time and help them to get confidence with the project they will work on. Besides the project's documentation there is a human factor that can make the difference between a just another dev team and a great one.2
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Sitting in a meeting with the dev team planning our project and thinking to myself "we are completely fucked"6
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You know it's gonna be a good Friday when the dev team takes a work trip to the store to get beer.
Happy Friday everyone!2 -
Me: We really need to improve our unit test coverage.
Team/Boss: <sarcasm> Haha yeah.
Production Bug: I'm doing something nasty to a client, because a dev broke something but no test coverage.
Boss: How could we have prevented this?!1 -
team lead: what is the minimum lenght validation on the first name field?
dev: i decided to put minlenhgt 3
team lead: why? did you tests it
Dev: i tested it. 3 makes sense to me
Team lead: isint your first name 2 letters long?
Dev: oh i dodth think about that4 -
You will know your 2 year old dev team is messed up when the 'best programmer of the bunch' does a line like:
boolean check = ...some logic...;
if(check == true) {...
:/ and I'm going to be leading this team..10 -
Today I got fired (I work for a outsourcing company and was the client that "fired me") and the reason was that the work load was low.... funny thing is that they contested a new dev for my team and she is staying only because she is in the same office as the main team and I'm on a different office.
How fucked up is this?29 -
I hate all of the people that think "agile" means "do everything at the same time, with no cost". Or, other fuckwits, think that "agile" means "fuck plans, dev team will figure something out".
Both of these types apparently did not read any publication about the subject.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!8 -
I'm a software developer. Last week I spent half a day teaching a "Senior Data Scientist" how to use git branches. I spent the other half a day teaching him how to use Jira. Now I'm being told that the dev team isn't raising enough Pull Requests. FML
-
Dev: Hey I need something from Team B
Manager: Ok I’ll get it from them now
Dev: Unfortunately they have the current time blocked off as uninterrupted coding time for the next two hours.
Manager: Yeah that means they’re not occupied by anybody else. It’s the best time to get a hold of them!
Dev: …4 -
Test server not working as expected - check with test team.
Test team experiencing the same problem - report to dev.
Dev team says the issue is not on their side - check with the service owners.
Service owner says it might be a problem with the request and gives me another point of contact - send an email with all the info.
POC says it doesn't have anything to do with him and copies "the right person".
Next person says to ask a different team.
Get reprimanded for asking too many teams.
Jeez idk, maybe if you stopped passing on the blame like a hot potato and actually helped me out I wouldn't need to.5 -
Startup company: "We love competing with each other! We (the sales team) play pranks and pass each other mini footballs! Mandatory team social nights (No we won't pay you for it)!
Me, a typical introverted dev: "HISSSSSSSSSSS, away, away!"
What's with these sales people making software companies reminiscent of 1980s Wall Street trading floors?1 -
Those weeks when you get calls from recruiters offering you up to four times your current salary.
I enjoy my job, love the atmosphere, team spirit, freedom (although sometimes there's a bit too much of this!), but I have a family and am saving to extend our house.
I don't want to let my team down, I'm the only programmer dev in a team of 3 (others do front end web design but not much JS), but sometimes I wonder if I should pursue one of these better offers...5 -
When you +1 one of your colleagues rants on devRant and realise the whole senior Dev team is on here. Hmmmm.3
-
Me: I deprecate a react component, because it's bloated and no longer makes sense, and I let everyone on the team know that we're working to get rid of that component
Other Dev: Hmm, if I copy this component for every time that it is used, rename all of my copy's and delete the original, I got rid of the deprecated component...
Me: After hearing that deprecated component was removed... "Good job other Dev"
Me: A couple of weeks later after dev leaves company and I start adding some new features to the app "WTF" -
So the dev team got invited to a management team meeting. First order of business: Happy Birthday Betty!!! Yey!! Second on the agenda: How's you son Dylan doing at school? Yey!?!? After fucking around for 25 minutes: why are the development team here? OHH! We didn't mean to invite you, must be a mistake. WELL FUCK YOU, AND YOUR SON DYLAN AND YOUR BIRTHDAY BETTY, YOU THINK WASTING OUR FUCKING TIME IS FUN!?
-
CEO: Please have the dev ready to update Product on 8/20.
Me: That's premature.
CEO: Okay, let them know they'll be updating the team on 8/20.
Fuck. You.2 -
In my team, unit tests are called so, because every Dev is a 'unit' who manually tests their own code...
-
That horrible feeling that you're holding the team back as a junior dev.
What took me two days of struggle, it took the senior dev a glance to solve the issue.
Literately took them less than 10seconds to complete the task which I spent two days both at work and after work of debugging and research to try and solve.
Why are they paying me to work here.9 -
Company switched some users from windows 7 to windows 10 overnight. Installation failed for most of the Dev team.
- No admin access
- Files missing
- Programs missing
Result : we can't work :/4 -
I guess I've just got the ideal dev job. Working from home, with nice people in my team and enough time to deliver quality work.8
-
I usually never had like a serious fight with a other dev I have a really good team but occasionally when I do this is my response. 🙂
2 -
My tech lead (or senior). I had been unmotivated with my dev life until I joined their team. He lit the fire in me by inspiring me and challenging me with my work. Sadly he left the team after 3 months but I'm thankful because he saved me from burn out.2
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When you see a "one word" commit messages and some are identical.
For God so loved the world! **face palm**
5 -
The senior dev in my team wants me to convert all the lambda expressions I have written to anonymous inner classes. He says it will increase the code readability.
IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT YOU CAN'T READ LAMDA EXPRESSIONS!!!!
It's like the dev has something against the new features of Java87 -
Today I was writing Selenium tests and was struggling to find a good way to test a text editor. We did a weekly code review and my team lead rewrote the test ij 10 lines to generically handle all cases.
Hopefully I'll be a good dev someday. 😔4 -
Story time!
I moved from React Dev to fullstack like halve a year ago. Three months ago I became project lead and now I will start to become a team lead.
Holy shit I'm growing fast2 -
I'm a junior dev in a scrum team with two senior devs: one actual senior and one average dev that's just been around for a long time. At stand up meeting, that average senior lists helping me as one of his task Every Single Day. 9 out of 10 times when I ask him a question we end up asking the senior senior together.2
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Conversation between a developer and admin team to change configuration in higher environment.
Dev: Please change these config parameters.
Admin: What is environment url
Dev: 😑. Gives the url
Admin: How to change?
Dev: 😑. Gives all the details
Admin: I am unable to perform as server is slow.
Dev: Whom will you report the slowness of server as you are the admin?😵
Admin shocked developer rocked -
The dev usually sitting next to me is on vacation. Our senior dev is on vacation. Team analist, on a plane to a Greek beach as we speak. Both architects the company employs, gone for another two weeks or so. Lead analist, you guessed it, on vacation.
I'm enjoying the peace & quite for now but god forbid I run into any problems these next coming weeks.3 -
My current new boss is pretty awesome. When he arrived, we were a lot of juniors dev crumbling under pressure. He directly went to product team and to sales team and totally reduced our workload to something acceptable.
He values sane work environment a lot, and I think that's what make a good boss -
ComputerToucher: *opens Jira ticket* Dev team needs tokens for the APM for a new app with multiple tenants. Ezpz. Hey, developer. Do you want one golden token for all of your app tenants or would you like us to generate one token for each?
Developer: Let’s have a meeting to discuss it.
CT: It’s…an exceedingly simple question. One token or 4? Which does your app support?
Dev: Yeah I think we should discuss with this with the platform team, can you set up the call?
CT: (Internally) I am the platform team? Do you not know how your applica-never mind I’ll just ask the PM directly.
CT (in chat): I’ll ask PM to schedule the call.
*Goes back to Jira ticket, changes priority to 4, removes ticket from sprint entirely, picks something else to work on*6 -
I’m currently watching Stargate SG1 (tok’ra 2/2) and by goa’uld (sorry) I’d love to be part of a dev team working on a stargete MMO!4
-
So first of all I'm not a dev.
I'm a software tester and my test manager is a douche, but this is not it.
Today I went to the end user place along with him to teach them how to test properly and how to manage the software test cycle in JIRA.
I did a demo and showed the users the software the dev team developed and of course there were a lot of rants about it.
Users noted down a list of things to be changed and we kept going.
By the end of the demo, my test manager started discussing the fact that I told these guys to open Bugs without test objects on Jira.
I mean, we don't have a test cycle or test cased yet but these guys found issues already, what's the point?
So here's the funny part.
He then starts telling users (which ignore testing fundaments) to create a test cycle called 'meeting of today dd/mm/yyyy" and create tests below it which were named with the names of who created them.
All of that without a logic and ignoring the fact that these tests were not tests.
I was laughing my ass off while assisting this total mess and I almost lost control.
And this is my manager.
Luckily, tomorrow is Saturday.4 -
My internship's sprint evaluation is in 2 hours, project is fucked and team is a band of baboons also i am the presenter and lead dev of the project.
Hows your tuesday going?2 -
Dev: Hey infra guys, our backend time to first byte takes 8 seconds! Can you guys investigate?
Network team: Oh yeah that's normal, we don't investigate anything below 30s, that's our SLA 😎
😵5 -
Picture a small product team, the dev side of it has 1 tech lead, 1 recently promoted senior dev, 1 junior dev.
1 - Offer your tech lead a severance package
2 - Hire a mid-level and a junior dev
3 - Give the product lead role to someone in their mid-20s that has no tech or project management background
4 - ???
The next 6 months are going to be interesting ones...3 -
dev: “I want to start working on [feature]”
Me: “I already started to work on it, sorry for not mentioning it, we need specs from design team before I can go on, but I’d suggest going for another task meanwhile”
Manager: “noooo design is very very busy, [dev] will take care of it.”
Me: “[dev] still needs specs from the design team... and I am half done with it so no real point in re-writing the same code I wrote”
Manager: “just trust me, we do this and [dev] takes care of it.”
*me and [dev] look at each other perplexed and just nod to the manager cause it’s Thursday and the fucks to give are over*
... am I actually a patient in an asylum? I question my sanity after this exchange of words.2 -
Wanna know how to piss off an entire dev team?
Agree that progressive isn't good enough, must be native.
And supporting ie7 & 8 won't take much extra time or effort...2 -
Oh my fucking God, the non dev we have on our team has no indentation or syntax filter whatsoever. I wouldn't be surprised if she has an unmatched or unclosed bracket somewhere. I'm gonna have to go in there and clean that shit up.6
-
When a customer question gets escalated all the way to the dev team when it could have easily been solved if those escalating the issue had bothered to use the site themselves
-
* Teams meeting, doing some early testing with the client *
Dev Team: This is an early build, so please be aware that bugs can occur at this stage. (That's why we didn't want to show it but you insisted)
Client: Sure, don't worry.
* 15 minutes later, first bug happens because some state management at the front end was not tunned yet *
Client: Can you solve this bug?
Dev Team: Sure, just let us replicate it and we come back to you as soon as...
Client: Can you solve it now?
Dev Team: ... Okay, let us ser whats happening and we will come ba...
Client: You don't need to hang up, just solve it.
*Dev Team internal chat*
Me: Fuck
Other dev: Fuck
My leader at the time: Fuuuuuck
PS: This happened in two separate occasions. I hated that project.6 -
some genius modafaka thought REPLACING python3.6 by 3.7 in all the dev machines is gonna be fine... the whole team is going nuts... fuck you IT... who gave you the permission5
-
Why the fuck management keep outsourcing entire platforms for in-house use if we have a fucking dev team...
Those platforms are constantly having contract issues and one we recently rewrote from scratch and is waaay better than the one they fucking paid another company to do....3 -
Haven't ranted in a while so here it goes.
Head of product took me (senior dev) to a high value client workshop/demo session and over the course of two days found the reason behind why the dev team has been pushed to the limit as of late and sales/product team has been making promises to clients without checking with dev leaders on reasonable delivery dates on massive new features.
I tried my best to manage expectations by differing talking about delivery dates by saying "lets discuss that with the team" rather than giving out dates right now. But as soon as the meeting ends he sends an email to the client confirming delivery dates on features that we have done no research on or even specialize in!
Please tell me this is not how well established businesses work or is that the new reality of things. In either case I wanna find a new job :/2 -
That time when you are coding and you recieve your free stickers. This is going to be an even more awesome day!
Thanks a lot team dev rant! Greetings from Argentina.
PS: yes, that's a Mario cup ;)
4 -
Figured I'd post for some advice here and see if anybody has had previous experience or success with a situation like this.
My team is generally comprised of full-stack developers completing front-end custom work on sites, writing back-end tools, and fixing broken sites. We are a rapid-response DEV team, and we typically turn around any custom requests in less than 5 days and fix any broken sites on the same day as they were reported. We manage almost 15,000 sites across multiple countries, and deal with very large corporations that many of you interact with every day (I'm trying to be cryptic here hahaha.) There are 16 of us on our team, and we are the only DEV team within our department of 500+ people. We are also the only DEV team taking requests from these 500+ people. The way the department works, we are the final say on whether a specific piece of custom work will get completed or not, and we are the go-to people when anybody has a question about our system infrastructure or if our system can accommodate a request, along with how to fix any broken pieces of our platform. We typically get about 150 requests per day. Lately, the entire team has become unhappy with our compensation for the work we do. We're quite underpaid, and they keep giving us more responsibilities without any sort of extra compensation. We've discovered that there are a large amount of non-developers below us that are getting paid more than we are. We've found that we get paid about $15,000 less than a comparable DEV team in a different department (let's call that team DEV_2,) just because of which department our team exists within, and how our department defined our job back when this position was created a few years ago. Ever since the position was created, our team's responsibilities have exponentially increased. We believe that there is absolutely no reason that an entry-level position below us should get paid just as much, or even more in some cases, than a developer. Of course, we're not asking to pay them less. Instead, we've decided that we're going to bring this up with our manager and schedule a meeting with him, our Department Director, and Human Resources, and voice that we believe that we should be on the same payscale as the comparable DEV_2 in the other department.
To be a good developer on our team, you need to not only have coding expertise, but also an encyclopedic knowledge of what you can do within our platform without any coding. You need this knowledge so you can pass it along to any people in positions below you, in case they didn't know that something could be done without custom code.
We're going to argue that if it weren't for our team, the company would be losing millions of dollars in clients, because people wouldn't have anybody to go to for platform infrastructure questions, broken websites, or custom work. Instead, they would need to send these requests to the DEV_2 team, which currently take about 6 months to turnaround requests. Like I said, we are a rapid-response DEV team, and these particular clients think that a 5 day turnaround time is ridiculous. If they had to wait 6 months for their request to be completed, they would cancel their contracts.
Not to mention the general loss of knowledge if the members of our team went to a different department, which would be catastrophic for our current department. Believe me, this department could not function without this DEV team. If we all went on vacation for a week, the place would be on fire by the time we got back, and many clients would be lost.
Do any of you have any experience with a situation like this, and if so, how did it turn out? Thank you!5 -
The `sed` command skills of my senior dev (team lead) is equal to every skill I (junior dev) have ever acquired until now as a programmer.
Just amazing !1 -
Company is celebrating new awards. Whole dev team basically says fuck you we have better things todo and isn’t attending for champagne.
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It's depressing how much time I spend asking, begging, demanding, and pleading for the older devs on my dev team to follow simple naming conventions. And every time I ask, they act like it's new information.3
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Just needing somewhere to let some steam off
Tl;dr: perfectly fine commandline system is replaced by bad ui system because it has a ui.
For a while now we have had a development k8s cluster for the dev team. Using helm as composing framework everything worked perfectly via the console. Being able to quickly test new code to existing apps, and even deploy new (and even third party apps) on a simar-to-production system was a breeze.
Introducing Rancher
We are now required to commit every helm configuration change to a git repository and merge to master (master is used on dev and prod) before even being able to test the the configuration change, as the package is not created until after the merge is completed.
Rolling out new tags now also requires a VCS change as you have to point to the docker image version within a file.
As we now have this awesome new system, the ops didn't see a reason to give us access to kubectl. So the dev team is stuck with a ui, but this should give the dev team more flexibility and independence, and more people from the team can roll releases.
Back to reality: since the new system we have hogged more time from ops than we have done in a while, everyone needs to learn a new unintuitive tool, and the funny thing, only a few people can actually accept VCS changes as it impacts dev and prod. So the entire reason this was done, so it is reachable to more people, is out the window.3 -
Worst Hackathon experience:
Taking an API built by a junior dev team with minimal specs and "hacking for two pointless days" to make it work in production...
The whole Hackathon idea was an experiment to see if they could make the dev team stay late if they bought pizza and said "have fun".
We all spent 2 days cursing at the shoddy tools and lamenting that you can't run a Hackathon with a single directive and "production ready goal" yet remove any choice the developers have to actually contribute.1 -
var _self = Object.create(Rant);
Hello devs I'm back
A few months ago I joined a software development company and I was pretty specific that I wasn't going to do support or maintenance only feature development, well, this past 3 months I've been doing dev helping stablish good practices and a better architecture for the app, but guess who is joining a support team tomorrow, they sold me the idea of a refactor team, I was trilled and accepted, now they tell me it's a legacy bug fixing team, damn I hate this crap, hope y'all doing better5 -
The only technology that has updates more than microsoft windows--> android studio...Like the dev team gets a eureka moment everyday1
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Me and the team I manage after fixing bugs,
Me: hey devXY, please send a build to the QA to test it. I am going to a meeting.
*2 hours later
QA guy: hey, we did not receive any build yet.. we are already out of time..
Me to devXY: hello, why didn't you send a build to QA?
devXY: ok, sending it now.
ME LIKE: WTF!!!1 -
Currently developing an app with React Native for work. It started as a "would be nice to have" feature but now people wanna join my dev team and company wants to see results too. And I am just a student trainee. FeelsGoodMan
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Client : you are hired as a developer.
Me : we need more developers as there's more work and less time.
Client : Ok, here's another dev
(Meanwhile me doing my work...)
ON THE DAY OF DEMO :
Me : Here's the demo.
Client: it's incomplete, where's more work?
Me: that's the part of 2nd dev you hired before
Client : I don't care, I fucking need a work!
Me inside: (Why the fuck would the first dev becomes a task/team manager just because is the first one to join the project! Arrrgh!!! Hire a fucking scrum master to manage your fucking tasks/team, am just a fucking dev! )6 -
Q: How many broken releases of HipChat does a dev manager put up with before they move the team to Slack?2
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!(isRant(thisPost));
Submitted my third pull request today in just a couple months as an intern, got told I'm doing a great job and already being considered to move to a more in depth dev team. Honestly a dream come true. Great company, great people, and I have a solid shot at a REAL full time dev position after college. I'm so happy man all that work finally paying off. -
First dev job is my current one.
I'm a software engineer in test, writing automated UI tests for web and mobile apps.
Its pretty great. I work from home with flexible hours. I have a boss but he doesnt manage my dev team, he just checks in to make sure I'm getting support, training and have all my questions answered. My dev team is myself and 2 other people, both of which are cool, and all the work is dev-driven.
Might just stay here until retirement, that sounds easy.2 -
Oh my effing goodness...just went through the repo of an app we're working on and this new dev in our team saved his commits with, "ok", "done", "fixed", "another one", "arrggghhh!", "wow!"..."not complete"...for fucks sakes...DUDE!1
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Damn this week topic is hard.
I am gonna go with managing a team. I have to use the DRY SOLID YAGNI KISS on daily basis at non-dev tasks too.3 -
Our agile scrum team has finally shattered into two parts.
On the one hand we have front-end guys.
On the other hand we have backend- /dev-ops guys.
The FE guys don't care about the BE guys business.
They don't join pairworking and only noticing things that went bad, when a Backend guy has caused it.
Goodbye fullstack dev-ops team...
I really dislike that arrogant basterds.
Frontend Hobo-Bitches...! -
Next weeks rant theme should be worst dev day.
Any how today I fucked up at a whole new level. First ran a script thinking I am deleting my local dev environment.
*An Eternity later*
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkk
That dreaded script ran on main dev server and fucked up the server used by a team of 15+ teammates. Dead.2 -
When the management always knows better that something IS possible, and if you're wrong they just tell you to ask the other dev on the team...
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Here at the client site everyone uses Windows 7, since this is not an IT firm. They make jewellery. So I don't blame them.
The problem is their in house dev team are also forced to use Windows.
Today someone from their dev team was with me for a new project. Their senior guy sent us a mail mentioning that the project code is on AWS EC2 instance and we will have to SSH to see it.
I checked the code on my MacBook with SSH and copied it to local using SCP. The dev guy was seeing it in amazement. I asked, what's it?
He just asked, "You don't have to use PUTTY" 😮
I smirked 😏3 -
// TODO : Resurrect dev team
if(devRant.development ⩶ 'active')
devRant.notifications.addPanel({
content : [ '++' , 'comments' ] ,
type : 'split'
})6 -
Half of my dev team has decided to leave. Back-end decreases with 75% and front-end team decreases with 20%.
This is the fourth time that half or more of the dev team has to be replaced in my companies existing (which is less than 10y).2 -
It's been 1 month in my first dev job.
I'm really happy but there is one problem...
Despite my role as a full stack dev in a fullstack team, I deal with only frontend stuff so far.
I asked to get some backend tasks from my boss, and he said "in due time".
Is it because I'm a junior? Is it normal?5 -
When the only other person on your dev team is an arrogant, miserable piece of shit that you despise but have to pretend to get along with so you can get a paycheck
3 -
[tl;dr at the bottom]
(Project Team Group Chat)
dev: @Desing team, i have a question, there's a required field missing in you design, can i go to your desktop to get an quick answer/explanation about that?
design team:....
dev: hello..?
PM: [writes a huge text to tell me that i can not interrupt them even if its a blocker and that we (dev team) shoul write them down and tell them only once a day in the scrum meeting]
dev: uuumm ok
-next day-
dev: so about that field, why did you...
Client: WHAT? There's a problem with the design!? oh boy, lets re-check every view right now with the whole team!
(it took like 2 hours, the field was missing just because they forgot that feature)
PM: okay, @DesingTeam, answer any questions from developers when they ask you...
tl;dr
we spent almost two hours with the client just because desing team didn't want to answer me a little question -
Client: I need you to clean up the database and remove all rows [with children] with a timestamp older than 5 years
Team: OK
Team [internally]: we definitely need a dba for this
Me: dba? Why? A junior dev can do that
Team: yyeeaahh, but still.. A DBA would do it better. You know, foreign keys and everything
Me: ....8 -
In the beginning of October, I was around 9% of the dev team. Now with some firing & people leaving, I'm 50% of the dev team.
It might be time to jump ship8 -
We are researching enhancing our current alerting system (we use Splunk) to be 'smarter' about who is emailed/texted/whatever when there are problems in our applications.
Currently, if there are over 50 errors logged within a 15 minute period, a email/phone/text blast to nearly 100 individuals ranging from developers, network admins, DBAs, and vice presidents.
Our plan is to group errors by team and let each team manage their own applications. Alert on 1 error, 5, 500...we don't care, let the team work out the particulars.
The trick was interfacing with Splunk's API (that's a long rant by itself)
In about a day or so I was able to use Splunk's WebHook feature to notify a WebAPI service I threw together to send myself an email with details about the underlying data (simulating the kind of alert we would send to the team)
I thought ...cool... it worked. Show it off to the team, most thought it was a good start, except one:
Dev: "The errors are not grouped by team."
Me: "No, I threw the webapi service together to demonstrate how we can extract the splunk bits to get access to the teams"
Dev: "Well...this won't work at all."
Me: "Um..what?"
Dev: "The specification c l e a r l y states the email will be team based. This email was only sent to you and has all the teams and their applications"
Me: "Um...uh...the service can, if we want to go using a service route. Grouping by team name is easy using a LINQ query. I just through this service together yesterday."
Dev: "I don't know. Sounds like I need to schedule a meeting to discuss what you are proposing. I don't think emailing all that to everyone is a good idea."
WTF! Did you not listen to what I said?!!!
Oh well..the dev's proposal is to use splunk's email notification and custom Exchange rules with callbacks into splunk that resend...oh good lord ...a fracking rube goldberg of a config nightmare ...
I suspect we'll go the service route once I finish the service before the meeting.1 -
When your mostly done code that you spent time on documenting and keeping clean gets handed over to the sloppiest dev on the team. Because that dev is out of tasks and you got other work that moved up in priority. I really hope he doesn't ruin everything :(3
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So.. There are about 4 jobs in my country that even mention golang, and only as an "advantage"
😟 Wow.. learning Go really isn't helping..
Why isn't it used widely as the main language of a dev team?? Too young? Or are there serious issues, that most companies prefer using c#/ruby/python for web dev backend?8 -
The worst part of being a dev? Working in teams.
And I don't mean that in the "I'm the best ninja code wizard in the whole world and you're all holding me back" kinda way. I'm thinking more in the lines of someone who has to deal with that kind of attitude on a daily basis. As someone who recently was put in a leading position in a dev team, this is by far one of the worst experiences that came with it.
Some examples?
- One dev completely changed the naming scheme for variables in a class he worked on for one. single. bug fix. His reason? He just didn't like it!
- Another one noticed that data he was supplied with was not in the specified format. Instead of flagging this with the project leads, he just rewrote his parser to fit the data. A couple of weeks later the supplier noticed the error, fixed the format and suddenly everyone wondered why the software failed processing the data.
- Or that one senior dev, that just refuses to accept changes because "it was always done like this and it worked" No, it didn't. That's why it was changed!
Once a dev team reaches a certain size, people need to realize that stuff like coding rules and process guidelines are not there to annoy them but to help the whole team work as efficient as possible. I don't care how good a programmer you are, if you can't check your ego you don't belong in any kind of team-oriented development project! -
Bad case of schadenfreude the biggest asshole on the dev team is having issues with his code merge! Someone merged 2 mins before him...lol. This is why you used the command line not the GUI!
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I've got an offer from college development team to make a school website with them.
I've no idea of web dev except HTML, CSS, basic js and PHP.
Should I get in?3 -
One stubborn (but not very good) dev working on one part of new project (Windows desktop application with C# underneath) decided he didn’t like the interfaces we were agreeing for the algorithmic code.
Instead of discussing with the team (we were still very much in design phase), he made his own interfaces with the same name but in a different namespace, and in his assembly rather than in the base library. He was senior to the rest of the dev team, so when we raised our concerns he pulled rank and just carried on.
I resigned not long after that. -
!dev, much rant
The world of hockey will never be the same. We officially have the best hockey team in the world. Stanley Cup 2021 inbound.
SEATTLE KRAKENS!
(Post mostly for Stuxnet)
24 -
My first job was at an e-learning firm, and I was a part of the team that made the digital content.
The team had a really good spirit. Often too good, as our team manager often gave up on us and left our weekly status meetings because we were all just joking and having a good time.
Still, we usually did an OK job and delivered on time.
Those were good times. Now I'm just a single dev without a team in a pretty large company. Luckily, I'm away on paternity leave atm.2 -
A dev in the team just found out about JavaScript promises. Now he is putting them everywhere but never handling errors, so it's impossible to tell where the app is actually failing because the error points to the Babel polyfill and the stack trace is not long enough.1
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I don't know how to feel about this: in the dev team I am the only one working with a dark theme.
Are they real developers? Where am I?6 -
Wooh! I finally have some work, I'm now the composer for a small dev team, unpayed of course, but this is a fangame, a passion project. I'm so happy!4
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Is there any sense in using git for a personal project of which I'm the sole dev? Just as a way to learn version control and such, or is it nothing like what it would be as a larger team?14
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HR: "you are the highest paid dev on team"
Dev: Then not just me, the entire team should get a hike 🥴
HRs are hired because they are good negotiators.
#aFriendsStoryAtABigMNC -
Figured out the root cause of slow code by using a profiler in an afternoon (more like an hour but needed to confirm/investigate)...
Team spent over a week trying to figure it out using logging and debugging...
Even after I told them to use a profiler...
Guess now I've justified my position of being the highest paid dev on the team.
I just know how to use other tools besides a hammer.1 -
Is the office dead in the dev world? Does everyone prefer to work remote from home, coffee shops or Coworking spaces? Or is there still value in working as a team irl, but modern office culture is killing it?24
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I'll be starting a new job soon, and I'm sure there will be a chance to implement some form of process for the dev team to use...
To Scrum or to Kanban?2 -
I reported to our team leader (who is not a developer) that me and my colleague has been having problems with our senior developer whose codes are unmaintainable and messy. I told the team lead that I am losing my trust towards my senior developer and that his codes are messy and not following the coding standards. I was nervous at first because this certain team leader is tight with the senior dev. But still, I expected the team lead to be objective.
I was surprised because the team lead asked me if 'I was perfect' and then the team lead continued to shift the conversation towards me. Team lead then started to compare me with the senior dev which is unfair because I've only been working for 2 years whereas the senior developer has been doing this for 6+ years. Team lead said that I was arrogant. Team lead sent our convo to the other teammates and friends. Team lead told me that I am such a baby.
Fast forward, the senior dev talked to me. Told me that he was busy so he didn't get to improve his codes. Which I dont buy because I often see his discord status as playing during work hours. Told me that it wasnt him. Which I dont know if i should believe since he always lies. Told me that his knowledge is outdated. Told me that maybe because I came from a good university and he did not. He apologized and told me he will improve. Sounds good right?
It's a lie. Because then my friend gave me a recording of his voice ranting about me after our talk. In that recording, he said that I have nothing to prove so I dont get a say. He said that he doesnt care about me. He said that I am cocky. Which I dont understand. I only commented abt his work, why is he attacking me personally? Plus, if someone new like me already already noticed the flaws in his work, what does that say about his skill?
My teammates then asked me to just take the fall lol take note that these teammates were also complaining about this senior dev. they asked me to just give them what they wanted to hear. That I am the one who's wrong and the bosses are right. I said I wanted to defend myself but they hated me for that. They told me to think about what would happen to them. They told me I am selfish. Is it selfish for wanting to defend myself?
I defended myself. I told the senior dev that my intentions are for the right reason. He told me he understands. Later that day, a friend told me he talked behind my back again.
Senior dev told me that the team leader cried because of the words I said. Which i found confusing because it was my own feeling, my own opinion that i am losing trust with this certain senior dev so why would the team lead be so affected by that? Also, i showed our convo to the most objective people i know and they said that i didnt say anything that is offensive nor arrogant I have no control as to how people would react to the words I say. It's beyond me.
I feel so helpless. I told those things to the team lead because I think a team should be open to each other but I was blown out of proportion instead. My friend told me that the team lead and the senior dev are still talking behind my back.
If they do this every time someone tries to speak up, will they ever grow?24 -
how do you tell a junior dev on your team there code is shit and please don't push to the main codebase without approval first,
without crushing them and and sounding like an ass cause there a good person just a n00b developer8 -
Last day on my first job where I stayed for a year. I really enjoyed it, loved the team, we were always laughing and making jokes, even in the worst moments.
Had a leader who became a friend, I made some good friends in there.
But I was really unmotivated as a dev, we maintained a really old and complex software, with a poor infrastructure for the dev team.
The manager was a great guy, but couldn't handle much pressure, saw him about 3-4 times quarreling with someone when he should be talking with the team to solve the problem.
But as I said, he is a great guy.
Today the whole team will be making a happy hour as my farewell party. I love this guys.
After that, on monday, I'll be joining a new company, working with a whole new stack, studying a lot for this new challenge.3 -
So I came from the Portal modding scene. And I know most other ones who did similar stuff.
Now there was a cool looking upcoming free mod and I somehow came in touch with the lead Dev. Now somehow I managed to get into the developer team and me and my girlfriend we're part of it. We got a level name and should start mapping it (TL;DR, we never finished one because we didn't know what to do).
I actually made a website for the mod. But sometime later we both left the team because the lead Dev (12 yo btw) was "hiring" (working for passion not money btw, that's fine in this case) everyone he got in touch with. They had no team structure just a huge list of people and a long story script. I'd guess the mod won't ever be done, although it has made it through steam greenlight (R.I.P greenlight). Just because they're not working on a team. -
Ask to get DB back ups done, contact DB team => cant log in => have 2 contact wintel team => they believe a reboot will sort it => contact customer => permission to bounce given => contact team to bounce => shifted back onto DB team => bd team open lync conversation about bouncing => no reply to mails if all is well in the world => sit at desk cant start dev cuz know will be sucked into aroganizing this brewery piss up with a bunch of bums....... cue putting on headphones and blasting some music at 11 ,,,,,,,,,,,, been waiting to deploy for 4 hours !!! FML2
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I ended up taking over a dev team. I asked a dev why his code wasn’t in the repo, he said he wants to get it right first.
(Internal screaming): Repo isn’t for just done code you spastic zoomer, people need to setup build pipelines and cloud resources based on a new repo existing. You should have at least pushed a the default template project weeks ago like I asked.1 -
Me and Team Developer,
One day he was calling some apis and getting error
Dev - Hey , the apis seem not to work
Me - Ohk which api, i will Check
Dev - Ohk here is the api and issue
Me - Spent time in checking multiple values for same api, and...
it was working fine with no issue.
Me- SO i asked him to check again
Dev- he again said, still the issue
Me- Ohk give me the same input to try
Dev - Ohk Here is the id of the record
Me - Tested and not working... more tested and got issue like, the id was for some other record, and not actual id he need to call
Me- I told the Dev that he was sending wrong id.
Dev - Ohh Shit, i will check
Me - Yeah, let me know
Dev - Yeah , its working and i wasted 3 days just for this issue.
Me - I said yeah Ohk Fine. (Me Frustrated, as time wasted due to the input issue not mine Api)
Most of the time, this happens and i have to jump to solve. Can Anyone related to this happen with you or your team ?
Comment below7 -
customer claims they do scrum but they have quarterly planning events (2 full days) where we need to estimate and plan everything for the next 3 months.
Manager: "last quarter I calculated your velicoty so now you get 4 story points per sprint per developer"
Team: "But you started us off at just 5 per sprint that's too small"
Manager: "Ok but if you only did 4 why do you now want 20"
Team: "Because it's arbitrary and we say we want to"
Manager: "1 story point is 1 day"
Team: "story points aren't time"
Manager: "4 story points is 1 sprint"
Team: "but a sprint is 10 days"
Manager: "the junior dev can do 4 story points per sprint and the senior dev can do 4 story points per sprint"
Team: ...8 -
When the fellow dev on your team buys a house and you just want a dog and your future model 3 (we are the same age) #LifeGoals
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Give me an example of a cool thing your PM/team leader did for your dev team.
Our douche PM got sacked so i need ideas for my fellow dev team 🤓
*chuggs coffe in celebration*2 -
Java Dev: "Does Josh's team own this java service?"
Scrum Master: "They did the dev work but we own it."
Java Dev:
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Saw my previous dev professor in an event, almost 5+ yrs have passed since I last saw her.
We were tied to a team and when she asked me what skills can I contribute I said Web Dev, I swear her face turned sour with disappointment. What's so wrong ?2 -
You know you have a great dev team when you signed them up on a codefight tourney and nobody even scored.
Seriously, did u guys even try? FML1 -
I'm currently the only dev that works with a client's dev team. That's not really how we usually work, usually it's a whole team of ours.
Three aspects why this sucks:
1) the client's dev team is made up of juniors and junior to intermediate devs. All of them are new to scrum. I therefore have to constantly support (dev & agile workflow), check all the PRs and have to think of everything in Refinement meetings.
2) the client's based in another timezone and the PO is super busy because we're the only agile team in their company. Therefore this is going to be the third Friday in a row where I have meetings until 6pm.
3) I also have a specific time frame I have to start working for my company, so I constantly work extra hours due to the time difference.
I'm just tired.4 -
First day of first dev job complete. Already in love with my team. But why didn't anyone tell me about Emmet before now???5
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Windows Dev Team: "I know! We should just ask them to enable Cortana 8 different times during setup, it'll work."
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Never knew ww1.localhost.3000 is registered until a noob in our team tried to access the local dev server :(10
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*Email chain forwarded by support team to our dev team*
Hi,
Please assist our customer. He is unable to reset his password!
*Went through the emails turned out that customer is asking for password reset request for legacy website for which we don't work at all*
Scrum master sending another reply to look into the matter on High priority.
We again double checked for the customer but he is not registered on the new website.
Apparently, both scrum master and support team and entire company is aware that our team is not working for legacy website.
But No one reads the email properly and keep forwarding to dev team disturbing the entire team.
Some times things like this are done by product manager and her associate, but they keep replying to each other on unnecessary things till they come to conclusion and scrum master try hard to keep up with them with his own agile disciplines. -
Anything related to UIs or data science
That, working with a spaghetti codebase, or unhelpful and not nice teammates -
Project is dammed, is broken, we complain about it for almost 3 months, daily, code is old and client is full of bad practices and is always searching for a way to blame us for his failure.
Administration decides that best solution is motivate meditation techniques on dev team1 -
I first got into programming when I was really young. I recall programming a square at a museum in Ohio, and after that I was hooked. I learned Logo and was on the web dev team for my elementary school while attending there. I used Hotdog HTML editor 😂
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Leaving the company in 9 days (!!!)
Any suggestions for the last week?
Any ideas for a leaving session?
I updated the Wiki and documented everything.
I did the missions no one wants to do and a lot of dev tasks.
What else can I leave behind for the team?16 -
Isn't it fanbloodytastic when you switch dev teams and your former team mates start blaming you for broken builds?
Fortunately I had logs to cover my arse. F*** blameworthy company cultures. -
My dev team needs team building activities (not necessarily dev related, but yea.) Any suggestions?14
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I work on a small dev team. A team member recently left. My boss is lenient about committing our repos. ex co worker didn't commit his code and instead just left his code on a zip drive. Today I had to resolve nine months of conflicts and basically throw out all the work this guy had done.8
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I really want my dev team to ask me to go to happy hour so I can suggest meeting at Foo Bar. Though, that may be why no one's asked..3
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The leader in a dev team should be the BEST DEVELOPER
Not the one with "leadership" or "strong ownership" skills and "team player" or "go getter" attitudes. This is euphemism for promoting someone just because you like them, or because of their charisma.
There are many other industries where charisma can play a role in leadership but software is not one of them. To build good software we need to be objective thinkers, not influencers.15 -
When there's a dev on your team that's infamous for throwing code over the fence and you're always the one cleaning it up.. priceless.
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OH: We have a DevOps team that does neither Dev nor Ops. An SRE team that are not engineers and a head of SW Dev who said with a straight face today that our Oracle multi-monolithification over the past 3 years was a ‘Digital Transformation'.1
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Sister dev team shifts to another floor. Manager doesn't shift our places. Says since QA and testers are in this floor itself, stay closer to them -_-2
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I wrote 2 steps (20 words max) instruction for my team mates how to run local env.
30 min later a dev pings me that local env is broken. I found out that he skipped 2nd step.
He claimed he had overlooked it :D1 -
Going to completely blow a deadline? I have a solution, but the entire dev team on the project. That'll solve the problem!7
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Dev on my team likes to declare his variables types System.Int32 instead of int. Drives me crazy!!!2
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Time to face the truth.
I'm being moved from one team to another. Which is great.
But the reason I'm being moved is to take over for another dev. So that dev can get a promotion. So basically I'm getting a promotion, without the pay raise.
I can't fight this either.
So I'll take this as an opportunity to get all the experience. Also begin looking around.1 -
I started working at a new company a couple of weeks ago as a Dev/Ops engineer, my first real ops position after years of being mostly a dev with two sys-admin positions sprinkled in.
I should have seen the red warning signs when, during the interview, a developer told me the old devops team was so bad they fired all of them last year. After I started, I learned that all four people on our team were totally new. Three were hired after the last guy from the old team left (without any notice) and one person use to be a developer who was transferred over to this new team (but not to lead it).1 -
I'm at that point where I want to lash out at our team for not finishing a sprint. I've been doing the scrum master/dev role for months now and each sprint is incomplete since we have started the agile way.
Most of my team members are seasoned senior devs and my team's downfall are caused by not acting as a team. I'm the youngest in the team and have been acting as a babysitter for them.3 -
Alert fatigue is likely one of the biggest problems.
When you add in unactionable or false-positive alerts to the mix it can drive a dev team insane.
Step up your DevOps game!
https://m.youtube.com/watch/...1 -
FFS,
Team have a release candidate of code ready for a deployment but because a dev added functionality them deem should only be released in two weeks we have to cherry pick this chunk of code out,
yes other code now depends on this and is affecting lots,
FML wanker customer/QA team,
be happy that you are getting functionality early. -
Being by far the most junior dev on a small team is tough. On top of no real pro experience having to learn an unfamiliar framework and the overall architecture/design.2
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My project is losing in one week: product owner, team leader and to make matters even worse our best dev also leaves. FUCK ME. We will see what happens when shit hits a fun.2
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MICROSERVICES ARE NOT A SUBSTITUTION FOR GOOD DEV PRACTICES, IF YOU WERE A WERECODER BEFORE MICROSERVICES, A MIGRATION WILL NOT TEACH YOU/YOUR TEAM HOW TO CODE.4
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So I've just been proposed by my (now ex) team leader to be the next team leader. I'm scared to death because this is something completely new to me.
What are your views on the move from development to team leader? How did you handle the transition?4 -
So I was instructed today, after lunch, to spend an hour teaching a member of my team how to SSH, store keys, basic io routines, and create CRON jobs to auth our ECR registry by my team lead.. Why am I wasting dev time teaching someone how to use an operating system? Need I add, our primary Dev workspace is a spun up using vagrant using xubuntu. I just can't comprehend how this person has been using xubuntu as their primary OS for two months and doesn't know the SSH protocol. Much less how they landed a dev job without any prior experience with a *NIX based OS.2
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Q: I don't understand why things break when they get updated.
Single Dev because I don't have fucking loads of money to spend on a Q&A team!!!! And it's FUCKING free.1 -
!rant
I just became scrum master for my dev team XD!
I started reading all the info I could find on the net about it but still want to ask you guys for any advise 😶1 -
FUCK EVERYONE right now. Stupid business with vague information, stupid dev team making SHITTY code. STUPID AUTO CORRECT TRYING TO CENSOR ME!1
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So some other dev in team changed something, and it broke the tests that I wrote. Ideally the dev should be responsible for fixing the tests too when I communicated this in the team channel my manager pinged me and asked me to fix it urgently. I'm already on PIP and wth is this? am I suppose to fix these tests too?6
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I love it when you and the dev team completely forget about the timeline and start implementing random shit thinking it'll work.
We will get there eventually -
Starting a new site in work and the Content Team ( no dev or design knowledge) suggest one thing i advise it shouldn’t be done and this is best path... later during day right so we are going with our idea! 😩
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#define DevOps team
- dev team that also does ops or vice versa.
- an ops team calls itself devops but does not actually do development :-|
- IT for developers
- or better to call it SRE team?
...1 -
What is the best way to work on a project with a team?, I mean, how to use git, runbots, scrum, kanbans, modeling, and the most important the deadline... D:6
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Quietish team member sits quietly and creates the mother of all APIs, doesn't say much about it, doesn't document what he's done, falls out with the boss, leaves with 2 weeks to go before a beta release.
Already overworked dev/backend support team are plunged into manic bug fixing/business rule implementing/call standardising/chaos.
This is not how one devs.
Not one bit. -
Update: now we are all home office for a while, and i had to set up signal (the dev team normally uses telegram) to keep in touch with everyone and wow what a fucking garbage app.11
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I'm halfway through reviewing the code for that one dev on the team who should know better but still ignores every standard we set. It's going to be a rough code review... for him
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Discovered Rider today, guess pressing anything than enter in grub is going to be increasingly rare.
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Any suggestions for Dev team names? My team has several new people and we have decided to change our name.10
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That moment when the Dev servers are down and instead of Monday work you're going outside to spend some quality time with the team 😁2
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*New defect*
Designs are confusing and use bad practises. Multiple buttons achieving the same task. The dev team, the BA's, PM's can't understand the current flow.
*Defect closed*
"Design happy with current implementation" -
Hitting `git commit -asm` when there are still untracked files.
And you knew that you fucked up the moment you see the result of your `git status`.2 -
Have you guys had any trouble trying to get the BAs to use JIRA for issue reporting/management? The dev team just upgraded to new JIRA and we are getting hard pushback... they're wanting to stick with 1-4 excel spreadsheets on a share drive...3
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Small start-up story:
The company hired independent foreign devs. The tech lead developer has decided to leave (due to some disputes with the boss(es)). The rest of his team are subcontractors/other independent devs that are good friends with the lead dev. We also recently adopted a 'scrum' which they really dislike.
So I guess there is a small change we will have a back-end team in the near future.2 -
Developers on the same team who use Windows. Web dev even with Vagrant becomes a pain in the ass for everyone else who need to be interoperable with the Windows ways.
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Any tips on taking more of an architect role and dev team manager? Also on becoming more business oriented?
Kinda being pushed into it by life but I'm not sure how to do it. I am checking some O'Reilly books as a starting point.1 -
Every dev team has this chatterbox guy, who works as a support, does sometimes whole work in a hour, watches anime for following 7 hours and wants to fix the whole world with JQuery. Still can't imagine working and hanging out without him.
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Hi everyone, I’m a college student and I have a career question.
I was contacted by a company to apply to their recent graduate program and it seems like a great opportunity for me. In the program, they assign you to a team (AI/ML, computer vision, automation, compilers, web dev, etc).
I need to send them my resume. I want to work with their computer vision team (I took a computer vision class and fell in love with it) but my resume only has web dev roles (I’ve only had web dev internships).
I’m worried that because my resume only has web dev stuff, I will be assigned to their web dev team instead of their computer vision team.
I really don’t like web dev anymore and I’m not sure how I can express that. Any ideas? Should I add an blurb in my resume expressing my passion for computer vision?2 -
Lazy / idiotic PMs or BAs. No mather how hard the dev team tries, if the analisys or the management is bad, you're screwed.1
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What are your thoughts on sprint planning meeting with poker cards? ( Everytime we had those meetings, dev team points are always similar and rest of the people never)6
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Hi guys! We are still searching for another dev to join our team for the hackathon hosted by Deutsche Bank in Berlin (late october). We're currently a team of 2: @ginjikoibito as iOS-/Backend-Dev and me as Designer.
So far the idea we want to apply with goes in this direction: Real-time evaluation of social structures through analyzing wealth & transactions provided by anonymized user-data of the API. It will also incorporate recognizable networks between users.
Sounds interesting? Please leave a comment, we're happy to share more with you :-)2 -
I'm pretty sure remote teams don't work with the remote team doing all the coding and we have the same exact JD and in the same department...*sigh* when management are foreign, they really are afraid of letting the local tech team help out. No wonder we are 3, sorry 2 since a fellow dev left to a better job in Amsterdam
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Hey guys, I'm new to a dev management role. One of my responsibilities is to write tasks and do code reviews for the team. I keep getting issues in code due to the lack of contextual understanding of the codebase. How much detail should I include in a task? Should I expect my team to understand the context of the task/codebase?3
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Once I wanted to be part of a prpduct development team, until I got to see its code. Layers and layers of code like baklawa, even worse maybe. Every dev using that layer in his own way! A nightmare!
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Voice call with the whole dev team
Former team leader: Yeah, basically we stopped using RxJS because it ended up being too complicated, every minor problem required so much code to solve :(
IHateForALiving, extremely loudly: WELL WELL WELL, GOOD FUCKING MORNING, SUNSHINE3 -
Why asking your dev team for any suggestions or solutions when you can easily say „make new website! Fast!“... now we have a new Website providing the exact same features as the so desired App... no further words for this.1
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How to deal with a loud speaker dev (broadcaster) who keeps the team updated with every idea coming to her mind ?!3
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!dev
Assuming your office is not against workplace dating, how would you feel/react if a colleague asks you to a date on Slack?
Scenario 1: you guys work in the same team.
Scenario 2: you guys work in totally different teams.11 -
Finding a dev for our dutch team is hard. Our demands are not that big. Can be a junior or senior php guy. Bit of front end required. Any tips? How would you like to be contacted?18
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Has anyone used Trello for project management? If yes, what are your thoughts on it? Would it be good for a small IT/Dev team?3
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So I recently started a new position as a Node JS dev, and on my first day I've been assigned to the DevOps team... The offer and the interview had me believe I was going to be actually writing code not config and yaml files5
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We're re doing our company website and they put a non dev on our team for extra "hands" but when she's pushing code and re writing my shit that makes me a little nervous. Good grief we need a merge to master5
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when you are trying to fix something for another team and they have 3 dev environments with none of them in sync with the git repo
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Yesterday’s dev achievement. Created a docsify project so that the rest of the company can start documenting their shot.
Something I had implemented in my team a while back, first thing this morning I get a message from the CTO to add mermaid support for his architectural graphs for his latest project.
Tomorrow’s dev achievement, 0 lines of code will be written after 9am. -
Im backend dev. I just had a meeting with the full team to discuss the ui design and implementation...
But I dont see my full team meetings to discuss the sofware design and architecture... u.u3 -
Working as sole dev and learning everything on the fly, including "proper" ways to write code. Now that I work in a team, I can see that I'm at least adequate at my job.
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Agency life where the dev department plays 3rd string to our Creative/Experience team and our Demand Gen team. Mainly because the leadership has no idea how to sell dev work?
Oh, and when dev work comes in, its on a super rushed/compressed time table where we've over-promised, and under-charged.
No margin on this project? Yeah, no shit cause you sold it for 50% of what we told you it would cost, dumb ass.2 -
What do you you think about a full remote consulting dev team organized as a cooperative ? Have you some experiences to share ? Is it viable alternative to freelancing ?
Cheers 🍻3 -
I work my ass off on multiple tickets, some are even incomplete tickets from another dev in vacation. The PM team under estimated the time the client needing these features.
PM during stand up: I would like to thank *some random dev* for adding comments to his tickets. It is very helpful. -
* before joining platform dev team *
"I wish I could always install the latest sw; then I would have all the cool stuff…"
* now *
"I wish I didn't need to live on pre-beta; none of my tools work properly anymore…" -
Really don't want to work tomorrow. I have this PM who just constantly over burdens me. I'm in a tiny team of me and one other dev. Need a holiday soon! (Been 2 years) Currently doing the dev on 4 sites at once on my own.3
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I have to give my dev team a name,
I thought of funny stuff like nullexception, //to do, etc but im really looking for an epic name help out fellow devs something epic and subtly funny27 -
The worst project i work on is my actual project, this is not a dev project but a "Run the Bank" project !
check 3 times a day that servers are okay, logs are okay, unduserssolvedunderstand and give the "how to fix" to the dev team #pan1 -
Just in case there is a member of Squirrel POS Dev. team here... I hope you suffer from a slow and terrible death.
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When talking to the integration guys, installing a new testing environment takes about 3 weeks or more.
When a new dev arrive in the team, we set his dev environment in half a day.
I don't understand such a difference.5 -
so they brought a senior engineer to our (very small) dev team. I feel like poking my eyes with a nail looking on his code.1
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Trying not to end it all at the thought of a whole game dev team working through perforce. Incoming "oops I checked out the whole thing"
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Have a hackathon starting in 12 hours and have no ideas rn. Kinda freaking out, so would love it if you guys could help me out with some ideas! My team includes 3 computer science juniors, and we've worked with Java, Python and frontend and backend web dev frameworks.
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