Sit down before you read this.

So I interviewed a guy for a "Support Engineer" internship position.

Me and the team lead sit down and are waiting for him to enter, but apparently he's actually making a coffee in the kitchen.

This isn't exactly a strike since the receptionist told him that he can go get a drink, and we did too. It's just always expected for him to get a glass of water, not waste 3 minutes brewing a coffee.

In any case he comes in, puts the coffee on the table, then his phone, then his wallet, then his keys and then sits on our side of the table.
I ask him to sit in front of us so we can see him. He takes a minute to pack and tranfer himself to the other side of the table. He again places all of the objects on the table.

We begin, team lead tells him about the company. Then I ask him whether he got any questions regarding the job, the team or the company . For the next 15 minutes he bombards us with mostly irrelevant and sometimes inappropriate questions, like:
0: Can I choose my own nickname when getting an email address?
1: Does the entire department get same salaries?
2: Are there yoga classes on Sundays only or every morning?
3: Will I get a car?
4: Does the firm support workspace equality? How many chicks are in the team?
5: I want the newest grey Mac.

And then.. Then the questions turn into demands:
6: I need a high salary (asks for 2.5 more than the job pays. Which is still a lot).
I ask him why would he get that at his first job in the industry (remind you, this is an internship and we are a relatively high paying company).
He says he's getting paid more at his current job.
His CV lists no current job and only indicates that he just finished studying.
He says that he's working at his parent's business...
Next he says that he is very talented and has to be promoted very quickly and that we need to teach him a lot and finance his courses.

At this point me and the team lead were barely holding our laughs.

The team lead asks him about his English (English is not our native language).
He replies "It's good, trust me".
Team lead invites him for an English conversation. Team lead acts like a customer with a broken internet and the guy is there to troubleshoot. (btw that's not job related, just a simple scenario)
TL: "Hello, my name is Andrew, I'm calli..."
Guy: *interrupts* "Yes, yes, hi! Hi! What do you want?"
TL: "Well, if you let me fi..."
Guy: "Ok! Talk!"
TL: "...inish... My internet is not working."
Guy: "Ok, *mimics tuning a V engine or cooking a soup* I fixed! *points at TL* now you say 'yes you fixed'".

Important to note that his English was horrible. Disregarding the accent he just genuinely does not know the language well.

Then he continiues with "See? Good English. Told you no need to check!".

After about half a minute of choking on out silent laughter I ask him how much Python experience he has (job lists a requirement of at least 1 year).
He replies "I'm very good at object oriented functional programming".
I ask again "But what is your experience? Did you ever take any courses? Do you have a git repository to show? Any side.."
*he interrupts again* "I only use Matlab!".

Team lead stands up and proceeds to shake his hand while saying "we will get back to you".

At last the guy says with a stupid smile on his face "You better hire me! Call me back tomorrow." Leaves TL hanging and walks away after packing his stuff into the pockets.

I was so shocked that I wasn't even angry.
We both laughed for the rest of the day though. It was probably the weirdest interview I took part at.

At the ending part of the interview, I asked a final question to the HR.

Me: "So, what language is mostly used here?"

HR: "Since we're dealing with customers from different countries, English."

We have a bunch of white people in human resources that are trying to hire "diverse" people because the company sets HR diversity targets. Which is an inherently racist way of hiring someone.

I am told to interview this guy who claims to have Angular experience. Before the interview I ask to see a form that he has built in Angular. He sends me a repo which is ripped off of an open source project and has the readme and git commits removed. A quick web search shows that it isn't his work. He shows up to the interview and I find out he is from a Southern African country. I deliberately ask some questions about code that I can see he didn't write that I prepared ahead of time. He lies to me and tells me all about how he wrote it which showed me that he has no idea what the code does. I tell HR they better not hire him because he was very comfortable lying to me, and I'm confident that he doesn't understand any of the code that he showed me. I do not trust this guy and would never choose to work with him. HR lady says "Ah okay."

Today he walks in with a big grin on his face. HR lady fucking hired this guy. I can see his monitors from my desk and he spent his whole first day looking at a soccer website on his second monitor. I call up HR, "Why would you even ask me to interview him if you refuse to listen to my feedback?". Lady tells me "You need to be open minded about diversity. Probably most of the things you observed were either cultural differences or language barrier." I tell her definitely not. He lied to me multiple times, and he took credit for other people's work." She tells me that they will keep an eye on me because I'm not being open to diversity.

Are you kidding me? This white lady is literally stereotyping me as a racist because I'm white.

So this fucking HR lady called me a racist because she decided to hire someone that we shouldn't trust. Then she put this asshat on my project. Now I have to be cautious about my position because HR is "watching" my racist ass. Even though I am literally the only one on the development team that is white and speaks English as my first-language. I called a team meeting before the on-boarding is over so I can tell the other developers what is happening. We restructured our code review process so that I will never give him feedback. Then when the time comes that he slips up the "diverse" developers will kick him out so I won't be reprimanded as a "racist".

This company that I work for is a special kind of stupid.

Client: When I hit the “Subscribe” button, it gives me an error.
Me: What’s the error message?
Client: The email field is required.
Me: Have you entered your email before hitting the “Subscribe” button.
Client: Oh, I have enter my email address?
Me: Yes

English is a very complicated language.

Mother of god, was listening to the US govt hearing of zuckerberg about the recent scandals. The amount of very fucking simple obvious questions he 'could not' answer normally...

Govt person: Would you be willing to change Facebook's business model if this was required for the security and privacy of Facebook users' accounts?

Zuck: I don't understand your question.

Sorry, WHAT?! You don't need particular rocket science to understand what's being asked here. A combination of common sense and knowing the English language and English grammar in combination with maybe having finished some form of education should be enough to understand this ridiculously easy question.

Do you need it written on a golden plate with fucking blue letters in Facebook's font with the S letters as dollar signs while drinking 10 gallons of 'fuck every persons privacy'?!

Or maybe shoving it up your ass in the form of heated/glowing metal letters of 10+ inches in height? We could arrange that as well.

Me: chooses English for language, French for keyboard (because that's what my keyboard happens to be), speaks Dutch natively

Windows: oh great! You've told me to display everything in Windows in English. So I'll just show you the Windows store in Dutch, French and English (edit, and Russian in one of the Store tabs, for God knows why), all at once! Because who cares about your language settings anyway, right. You appear to be from Belgium from your IP, so obviously you speak both of these languages despite your personal preferences. Additionally, have some Candy Crush Soda Saga that you've never asked for.

And the application that you wanted to install - Ubuntu? Fuck you, you can't install it, for "reasons" that we've conveniently put in French, because you obviously speak that, right.

HOW ABOUT YOU FUCKING GO FUCK YOURSELF, MICROSOFT?!

So I picked up my little brother (6th grade) from school.

Him: We had computer hour
Me: Cool what did you do?
Him: We programmed a game
Me: That's cool. In what language did you program?
Him: English

I burst out in laughter because I didn't expect that answer.

I know I should have asked the question better.

After that I found out that they used scratch.

The client: Why you are writing using strange language, why you didn't use English? We can't accept that...

When someone tells you they're a programmer and you ask them what language they use and they say,

English.

WTF Python!!! "Master" and "Slave" perfectly convey the concept. In the English language many words have different meanings based on their context. It's plainly obvious that no allusion to human slavery is meant in the context of software or hardware module relationships. I don't even think it is problematic. The real problem seems to be the people who are taking terms outside their intended space. Why are we linking a scar on human history to terminologies explaining technical relationships?

Then lets also ban 0 and 1 because it can offends non-binary peoples!

Me: so, I heard you do programming! What language?
Person: ehhh, English...?

My father just called me while i'm at work:
"You go a big fancy letter writting in english from outside the country (english is not my native or even my second language) , what is it ? .. "
I realised after that it's the devrant stickers 😂
Can't wait to go home and open it 😁

So I was hired about 4 months or so in this companty, we will name it 'Derp & Co.'

The first task they want me to do was to 'clean' an android app that, for what they told me:

- Previous dev fired. said that tasks have been done but totally a lie.
- Took a fully week of 2 fellows coworkers to 'undo' the mess.
- And for the last but not least, zero documentation, like ZERO.

So, I clone the repo, install android studio, blah blah blah, get hands to the pile of code and jesus...

- The whole app was working with a gargantuan json, there was no use of POJOs at all. Objects are for normies.
- A masive copy/paste code, like 'I will need this here, crtl-c... ctrl-v, DONE!'
- Threads are free, isn't it? let's just put a thread whenever I desire to make an HTTP request and not reuse code at all.

So... with this on mind, my first task is to make proper objects:
- Coworker: 'Sorry dev, we don't have documentation for this, you must debug the code to se what the server will send to you'.
- Me: 'Real?'

Shit... ok. So I first try to figure out how the hell is made my gargantuan json. A month was entirely lost to unravel this data and implement Objects, improve their code, reuse code, etc. but at the very end:

- coworker: 'Good job dev, when the POJOs are done, we can focus on the next task, whe have to define a new DATA MODEL because the one we are using now is not good at all'.

*note: the app is on production and working with all the previous 'features' and today it still on use on some enviroments.

- Me: 'Wait... this is a joke, now you want to define new data models? This should have been done in first place!' <WTF face>
- Coworker: 'I don't think so dev, Mr. boss have this list with things to improve on the app an this is the order of do the tasks'.

Mr. boss is on vacations, two days after he came back:

- Mr boss: 'Coworker said that you have been working with POJOs, is that right?'
- Me: 'Yes'
- Mr boss: 'Why? Did not see the need of a new data model?'
- Me: 'I told that to him, but he insist on "the order" of the list.
- Mr. boss <facepalm>

This is one of the few tales i have from 'Derp & Co.'

PS: Sorry if i made a mistake on writing, english is not my first language and maybe I have done some mistakes.

Client: Sorry to bother you, but our developer team can not connect to your Web Service, can you help us?

Me: Of course, if you want, i can give you the code for that, i only need to know in what language are they developing.

Client: Sometimes they develop in spanish and sometimes on english...

Maybe i didn't ask the right question.

Sorry for my English.

Dear mobile apps devs,

No one's gonna hate you if you do not provide a multilingual support. Just, please, stop using Google Translate and force the app's language to the phone system's. It's just dumb

Sincerely,
A non native english speaker

As a developer in Germany, I don't understand why anything related to development like IDEs, git clients and source code documentation should be localized/translated.
Code is written in english, configuration files too. Any technology, any command name in a terminal, every name of a tool or code library, every keyword in a programming language is written in english. English is the language of every developer. And English is simply a required skill for a developer.
Yet almost everything nowadays is translated to many other languages, espacially MS products. That makes development harder for me.

My visual studio menus are a mess of random german/english entries due to 3rd party extensions.

My git client, "source tree" uses wierd translations of the words "push" and "commit". These commands are git features! They should not be translated!

Buttons and text labels in dev tools often cut the text off because they were designed for english and the translated text is bigger and does not fit anymore. Apparently no one is testing their software in translated mode.

And the worst of all: translated fucking exception and error massages! Good luck searching for them online.

Apple does one thing damn right. They are keeping all development related stuff english (IDE, documentation). Not wasting money on translations which no developer needs.

A bit long story about language barrier.

So I worked at an Asia company. The company decided to close a Northern Europe site which was considered to have low productivity. I was sent to that site to learn and take their job back to HQ.

One day when I was there, we got an email from a developer in HQ, requesting feature changes in the software maintained by the Northern Europe site. I heard the local developers were discussing about the email in their language. I don't speak their language but I could feel that they were confusing. So I walked to them and ask if I could help. They show me the email written in English by the Asian developer in HQ. And I was surprised that even I (who speaks the same native language with HQ dev) couldn't fully understand what the mail wanted to express. So I called back to HQ and talked to the developer directly, in our native language.

Turns out, he actually tried to say a completely different thing with that was written in the email.

Until that moment, I finally know why the site was considered to have low productivity. The men in HQ just couldn't describe the requirements correctly. And sure you got false result when you give wrong requirements statements.

I was so angry and felt sorry about the developers in that closing site. They were far more talented and experienced than most my colleagues in HQ. But they were laid off only because communication errors in HQ developers.

Our teacher asked us to write an essay. Since I'm not a native English speaker, I asked him if I could write it in English (essays are easier in English). He was cinfused at first, but said:
-You can write it in any language!
Guess who has an html/css essay

My dream is to build a shopping cart for web stores that doesn't fucking suck.

Seriously Bigcommerce, Shopify, Magneto, etc. All of you can eat bag of dicks and burn in hell for ever.

I don't care what languages you fancy, all of their stacks are a pile of shit, monkey patched together with popsicle sticks and duct tape and it all falls apart with high concurrency.

All their greasy haired sales teams will throw all manners of horse shit at the poor bastards who are trying to run a business so they can pad their commission checks... "High availability", "scalable", "reliable", "Increased conversation rate"... Lying dick fucks, all of them! I am calling them the fuck out on that snake oil they're all peddling.

The only thing worse than their shit APIs is the shit documentation and the shit support that accompanies them.

Support of these platforms are pretty much all the same, sure mayhaps one has 24*7 phone support and another closes at 9 or some shit like that, either way the only people they put on the phone are monkeys that will freeze up and say "I'm not a developer so I can't help you"... Guess what, "Eric"! I didn't ask if you're a fucking dev! I'm calling because one of your devs fucked up and I need you to tell him to unfuck it so I can get the fuck on with my day!

Their app/plugin market places are shameful to say the least. The overall quality of software is somewhat dire and it's mostly dominated by oversees developers who speak English about as well as the language they're developing with (not very well usually).

I could go on until I hit the character limit but I'm gonna end it here by saying, all shopping carts suck and they should burn for eternity in the depths of hell so that a savior can free all developers from this agonizing torment.

For the love of dog, if I select English on your online store, it doesnt mean I live in the UK, therefore show me prices in £ pounds, It just means I cannot speak German but I need to read English, but pay in € Euros!!! Can people please stop confusing Language with Location!!!!

Friend: i need to do a game for my final project, can you help me out?
Me: sure, what language?
Friend: english
Me: ...

Well today I got a fantastic surprise (truthfully). We hired a dev some months ago, who was on 6 months probation and, to put it politely, he was not going to pass it.

*side note: for details of some of the above, read my last 10 or so rants. They are pretty much all him.

Anyway, management put him on an improvement plan to make sure everything was fair, it wasn't working out, but they said we had to finish it to be fair.

So we had another 2 weeks left when he announced last night he's leaving for a new junior role, technical but not a dev.

Months of stress, heartache, bewilderment, late nights and weekends all just came to an end.

The English language fails me to express my overwhelming joy at this moment. The only way I can come close to it is to say that when he made his announcement, a colleague told me I should stop smiling as it could be taken as being rude.

I'd like to take this moment to thank the community for supporting me over the past few difficult months. Without you I probably would have tried to kill him with my dev rant stressball.

Thanks,
practiseSafeHex

At this point it's pretty much a matter of time before the English language runs out of words and JS framework developers resort to random strings for naming them.

Friend: "I made a really cool game!"

Me: "Awesome, what's language did you make it in?"

Friend: "...English"

-_-

NO programmer friend
Me : Which language is the most used in the world?
Friend : English

Programmer friend
Me : Which language is the most used in the world?
Friend : Java
Me :

I'M STARTING GRAD SCHOOL!!!!! I'm so excited I can't think properly. I started screaming in Latin and German mixed with English because I couldn't remember enough words in any one language to express myself, and I'm still certain I was incoherent.

Doing cybersecurity and forensics because I hate having a social life 😎

Name your stuff in English. Variables, functions, files. Everything.

You make the code completely unmaintainable for everybody that doesn't happen to speak your language otherwise.

I cringe every time I see someone in our company use German in his code. Just don't.

Manual Data Entry: Most boring job
This reminds me of one conversation with one of my faculty..
Faculty: Why not try some Machine Learning Project?
Me: Cool. Any ideas you have already thought
Faculty: Comes up with a really noble idea
Me: Awesome idea. But we need data
Faculty: Don't worry. I will get it. Just help me setup Hadoop (see the irony.. no data yet, and he wants big data setup)
Me: But we don't have data. Let's focus of data collection, Sir
Faculty: I will get it. Don't worry. Trust me.
( I did setup for him twice coz he formatted the system on which I did the setup first time)
After 6 months,
Me: (same question) Sir, Data??
Faculty: I got it.
Me: Great. Give me, I can start looking into it from today.
Faculty: Actually, it's in a register written manually in a different language (which even I can't understand) I will hire data entry guys to convert it into English digital contents.
Me: *facepalm*
Road to Manual data entry to Big Data
Dedicating this pencil to the individuals keeping the register up to date and Sir in hopes of converting it into big data..
Long way to go..

!rant

I am a professional programming master!

Oh, what language?

Language? English.

What do you use to program?

Scratch, it's like this hacking website

It's fine if you're 'not good with computers' and need help. Ask me politely and sure I'll see how I can help and teach you what you need so that you can do it yourself in the future.

It's not fine, however, if you refuse to fucking learn after the millionth time I've taught you how to do the exact same thing because 'It's too hard' and 'I won't understand anyway'. And then proceed to call me a bad and ungrateful friend because I can't come to your rescue the very second you need me and don't seem 1000% enthusiastic to help at 1am in the morning when I'm still doing my own work.

Sure, I'm the 'tech person' amongst our friends. I *do* understand the frustration you experience when something isn't working. But that doesn't mean I'm obligated to be your 24/7 IT support, while listening to your complaints of how I was probably the one who fucked it up in the first place when I helped fixed your phone/laptop last time (for the record, this was *never* the case).

UGHHHHHHHH

ps: I just found this community and I love it already! Thought this mental rant I had earlier would fit right in lol
(Also, sorry English isn't my first language D:

Standard Sunday evening I guess:
I wake up, satisfied that I already did all my tasks for this week and most of the tasks for next week.
5 minutes before I'm heading to bed I get a message from my boss saying he's disappointed that there is this one task I didn't finish yet, because he arranged a meeting with a customer about it tomorrow. Well, you know what you fuck, maybe, just maybe you should begin showing interest for your own company and actually use Jira to assign deadlines so people know wtf to prioritize. I'm so pissed off, I've been working for 4 hours straight this evening now, only to bang my head against the wall and realise I can't finish it since I have to buy a Windows 10 machine to test out some features. Fuck you! Maybe tell me next time you have a meeting about a certain thing. Yes, I could have spent more time throughout the week, and yes, you could learn to fucking communicate and show some care for your own company.
English is not my native language, so I can't really express how furious I am right now. And yes, he's genuinely mad at me.

English is my second language. Today I learned Fedora is not just a Linux distro. It's also a name of a hat.
Guess the old logo made sense.

this is the state of hiring tests:

1. can you take an english sentence, and without a tutorial, write a for loop?

2. okay now write a full parser. but not in the language we want to hire you in.

also we can afford to pay you in bananas, experience, and exposure.

p.s. we also need you to do this backend test because this is a backend job even though the ad is for front end and you specified an hour ago when the interview started that you only trained for front.

on the positive side, we have a ping pong table and a bean bag chair. and a two hour commute. Think of the benefits!

I've read so many stuff in english that it feels really weird to read something in my native language(german). Especially when they're using german words in their code:

public Nahrung mittagessen;
public Gast()
{
mittagessen = new Gericht("Wiener Schnitzel");
}

are you fucking kidding me?!

LEARN THE FUCKING WORDS!

I know that English isn't the native language of my country, but for fucks sake, if I'm telling you the right way to say/write it, remember it!

It's called ROM not ROOM
It's called Mod not Mood

Am I good with Custom ROM's? Yeah
Am I good with Custom Rooms? No, I'm not a fucking interior designer

Am I enjoying Moto Mods? Of course
Am I enjoying Moto Moods? Vruum Vruum bitch.

Playing Civilization on my dad's 386 running Windows 3.11.

I remember installing various games from like 8 floppy disks each. What really confused me was that in every single game I installed, the language was really weird and I could hardly understand half of it. Always asked myself why the hell every single game developer put the same horrible German-ish fantasy language full of errors in their games.

It was much later that I realized I've always been setting the language to Dutch, thinking it was German ("Deutsch"). Yeah, my English skills were horrible back then.

"IT BROKEN!", the QA tester spoke in unintelligible broken English.

The developer asked for more details.

Then the QA person attempted to explain the problem in a surge of verbal diarrhea and horrible English.

Why do we hire people who don't speak the language of the development team as our QA people? I have nothing against devs and qa guys from India...but it makes my job really difficult when I can't even begin to understand what you are telling me, or even worse...you just tell me "IT BROKEN!" and don't give me a single bit of useful information on how to reproduce the error.

There was this wonderful QA person I used to work with. Her name was Ranjana. She was a beautiful Indian girl with two children, and the best QA person I ever worked with. She took screenshots, grabbed logs, and gave steps to reproduce everything she found. And then one day at stand up we were told she had died. And since then...there has been no one who has ever come close to her level of excellence.

As a German developer living in Germany, I am used to write my code completely in English. In all of my former companies that was also the norm. In one company, we even talked completely in English with each other to a point where even if only German people where in a room, they would default to English at one point in a conversation because it became second nature to us.

(That company was very international and we had a lot of people from all over the world working there.)

Now, I work at a new German company that focuses on the German market. And for some reason I failed to ask them:

Do you write your code in English?

Because that's the norm, isn't it!? I just assumed it to be the case.

Nope! This time it is a mess of German and English term intermixing in glorious abysmal ways I never thought possible.

Sometimes we translate terms, sometimes we don't. So you have to wrap your mind around collections of words that COULD mean the same thing unless they don't. Best case, you have two words for the same thing, but I've seen up to five words (or abbreviations) to describe one business entity. Madness.

And don't get me started on the plurals. In English, it's almost exclusively: add an `s`.

In German, the singular and plural can be the same (e.g. all nouns ending with `-er`) so tough luck determining if you are on an object or an array of objects. (Weak typing language in use does not help either but that's an entirely different rant.)

Hello devRant,
I'm new in your community. Okay, not completely new because I try to introduce me in the community and now I think, I know how devRant works and what I could do here.

But who I am?

I'm David from Germany. I'm a hobby developer. I develop lots of stuff, Alexa Skills, Google Actions, Mobile Application for Android and Websites. I'm in a one team member "team"🤣. I develop the background and I "try"😉 to develop the foreground. I develop since 6-7 years and I start with HTML (I know it's not a programming language) but next to HTML I learned CSS. Now, I could programm in CSS, JS, PHP, MySQL, JAVA, C++, PHYTON and I hope I don't forget a language.

But the main question: Why I joined to the devRant community?

The main reason is that I want to see jokes meme and interesting topics. The secondary reason is that I hope I could learn English in a different way. I hope I'm not the worst English speaker/writer.

{Context: English is not my native language}

The first time my code get a review ( by my boss that time)

Boss: Your code is full of butts 🍑

Me: Eh, What?

Boss: *showing his screen* see that? variables names: validateButt, contactButt, seeMoreButt..

Me: *interrupting him* oh, I mean button.

Boss: I know, just being sarcastic, but it'll be better to get another suffix.

Me: 😐

Sitting in a germans-only company on a germans-only talk, listening to german presenters trying to speak english.
"...And sis is a Integräitontest, witsch is verry important [...] sis here is my sird maven plugin..." schnitzel.

Why for god sake do you funky hip devs mean you have to speak english to me?! Especially if you are simply not able to?

Some of my favorites:
My english is not se yellow from se egg but I hope you understand me.
Sänk ju for trävveling wis deutsche bahn.

Someone has similiar sentences?

I just love when someone writes variables in Polish/German/Russian/Chinese/Esperanto/Klingon or any other language that is not an English

Some back info that you need to know for this rant:
1) I am a Canadain, so I spell 'color' like: colour.
2) Americans spell 'colour' like color.

Today I was debugging a Python file that I and my team of Americans and Canadians were working on. I ran the code and got an error that one of our variables was named incorrectly. I searched the code up and down for 3+ hours looking for the issue. After taking my lunch break I came back and read the file again. Then I realized it: I had started working on one part spelling color like colour, and then an American finished the project, spelling colour like color, so there were two different variables. This really pissed me off because we could have fixed it by deciding on a language before we started the project. I fixed it quickly and now we have a new rule at the office: always use American English when naming variables.

Moral of the story: decide which language to use for variables when working on a multi-national team.

Dear customer,
as our services are completely free and we do not get paid for working, we beg you to understand, that there are some things you have to tolerate.

1. We are DEFINITELY not going to work 24/7 for you and answer immediately anytime. Only because it's 3pm in your country doesn't mean it's 3pm in our country!

2. We will NOT waste any time figuring out your gibberish and translate your language to our language or whatever, you have to be able to understand English anyways because our website and rules and everything is English!

3. Speaking of rules, READ THEM, I'm sick of explaining to you why you are banned, what do you think FAQs are made for?!

4. STOP SPAMMING AND TAGGING ME FFS. First we have a support chat so you can leave a message there and somebody will read it eventually AND SECONDLY I'M NOT THE ONLY SUPPORTER SO STOP BUGGING ME.

5. READ THE FUCKING MESSAGES I WRITE!

geez.. I just lost it for a second... okay.. gotta go now, I got 20 new messages since I started writing this rant.

Yesterday we started coding with my eldest son, with some board game (based in scratch), and it was so fucking amazing! I'm partial, but he's a fucking code genius!!!
In the game, the child "code" some functionality with cards and the adult (me) compute them 'doing the actions'.
I'm so fucking proud!!! Well, I'm always proud of my children, and there the English language doesn't convey very well my thinking as the verb to be doesn't differentiate the intrinsic state of a subject and a passing state:
SOY TAN ORGULLOSO DE MIS HIJOS!

I just had a rather stressful morning. I should've known something was up by the sounds of thunder as I walked into the office.

I sat down and checked my emails. There was an email from the boss who was away on a business trip. The subject read, "CRITICAL BUG" and my name was mentioned. "Great...No time for coffee", was my first thought.

I began searching commits to see when and how the bug came to be. "SHIT! It was my fault", I said aloud.

(A bit of backstory, I am Irish, working in Germany with a B2 level of the German language.)

I now had to communicate the problem quickly with a senior developer who is Russian. He can't speak English well and I would not expect him to speak it. We are in Germany after all. I tried my best to communicate the issue, but I found it so difficult to understand his German in a Russian accent. Normally, in the office I speak German except when it is urgent and I must explain a problem in greater detail through English. I got past that obstacle, however, the real challenge of fixing the bug awaited.

After 2 hours of coding, I had a solution and committed it to the master branch. All the while, I had been replying to the bosses emails with updates, probably with many grammer mistakes.

We have no dedicated testers here and the code is written in a way which makes it very difficult to test (i.e. it was written many years ago). When I had initially written the code, I tested rigorously and found no issues.

Just needed to rant. I need a coffee break now...

Udemy courses are targeted at ABSOLUTE beginners. It's excruciating to pull through and finish the course "just because". And some of these courses are jam-packed with 30-60 hours just for them to appear legit, but the reality is the value you get could be packed to 3-5 hours.

You're better off just searching for or watching for the things that you need on Google or YouTube.

You'll learn more when building the actual stuff. Yes, it's good to go for the documentation. Just scratch the "Getting Started" section and then start building what you want to build already. Don't read the entire documentation from cover to cover for the sake of reading it. You won't retain everything anyway. Use it as a reference. You'll gain wisdom through tons of real-world experience. You will pick things up along the way.

Don't watch those tutorials with non-native English speakers or those with a bad accent as well. Native speakers explain things really well and deliver the message with clarity because they do what they do best: It's their language.

Trust me, I got caught up in this inefficient style a handful of times. Don't waste your time.

Can someone please tell my boss / team that I am still in APPRENTICESHIP!!!

In the last few months I have been the only one who works for our second biggest client! On the paper an other guy is responsible but he does not know the project or the tech we use. But that's not all.

I also interviewed an external contractor (5x more salary),
introduced 8 more of them (technical and standards) [one of them in english, not my native language as you can see]
and I answered their question.
(Needless to say I get interrupted all the time)
Because of our unreliable infrastructure I get screamed at by the client and get calls after school from some coworker to talk him through fixing a bug.

Sorry for the long rant and all the english mistakes I made.
This had to get out!

PS Yes I have talked to my boss about it more than once, nothing changed

EXCEL YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! don't get me wrong, it's usefull and kt works, usually... Buckle up, your i for a ride. SO HERE WE FUCKING GO: TRANSLATED FORMULA NAMES? SUCKS BUT MANAGABLE. WHATS REALLY FUCKED UP IS HTHE GERMAN VERSION!
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT .csv? It stands for MOTHERFUCKING COMMA SEPERATED VALUES! GUESS WHAT SOME GENIUS AT MICROSOFT FIGURED? Hey guys let's use a FUCKING SEMICOLON INSTEAD OF A COMMA IN THE GERMAN VERSION! LET'S JUST FUCK EVERY ONE EXPORTING ANY DATA FROM ANY WEBSITE!

The workaround is to go to your computer settings, YOU CAN'T FUCKING ADJUST THIS IN EXCEL!, change the language of the OS to English, open the file and change it back to German. I mean, come on guys, what is this shit?

AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON ENCODING! äöü and that stuff usually works, but in Switzerland we also use French stuff, that then usually breaks the encoding for Excel if the OS language is set to German (both on Windows and Mac, at least they are consistent...)

To whoever approved, implemented or tested it: FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID SHITFUCK, with love: me

Age 19, got a government sponsored chance to go to India to study. Was called to study for Law. But didn't like it. Decided I wanted to change to Computer Science cause that's what I was interested in. Go to India and apply for computer science course but not law despite Parents wanting me to do law because hey Lawyers job is a good status in society.

Got a spot in BCA (Bachelor of Computer Application) . Totally new in programming. Started with C. Was freaked out with all the new things. Variables, comments, Pre processors files. All was new to me. Although the lecture tried her best, I couldn't understand her well because of language barrier. It was a mixture of Hindi and English.

Luckily she gave me a book to read, Let us C. That book helped me a ton. I realized I really liked programming. When summer holiday came I taught myself C++ . Then next summer Java. Then Android. Then some Web Development. That was last summer. But I kinda settled in Android and did some projects in it. Right now I am about to sit for my final exam. Then I will try my best to get an Internship or a job.

The whole "‹‹in what language you program?›› ‹‹english››" joke is all fun and games until you realize there's people who don't program in english...

Thanks for giving me the option?

!rant
My work does this contest where they email everyone a puzzle where you have to guess a safety slogan. They give you maybe 1-2 letters in each word and there are about 5 or 6 words. So I found a list of every word in the English language online, I imported it into a database and I ran a few queries to return all possible words for each, depending on the length of the word, and where the letter hints are placed. I haven't missed one puzzle so far. :D

p.s. I told my girlfriend and she said, "I am dating a nerd".

Now don't get me wrong, I love the multicultural aspect of open source coding.

But for the love of everything that that is sane, please do not write the basic readme and code in English, and then write the entire documentation for the code in another language.

(Yay first rant)

I fucking hate it when developers don’t respect user locale. My phone language is UK English, my Discord app language is UK English and my region is UK.

Then why the fuck is Discord showing me MM/DD/YYYY date format? How hard is it to pass locale when parsing time?

I starten when I was 12 years old. I got bullied and got interested in computers. One day I crashed my dads computer and he reinstalled it. After that my dad made two accounts. The regular user (my account) and the Administrator user (my dads account). He also changed the language from Dutch to English. Gladly I could still use the computer by looking at the icons :')

Everytime I needed something installed I had to ask my dad first (for games mostly because there was no cable internet at that time). Then I noticed the other user account while looking over my dads shoulders. So I tried to guess the password and found out the password was the same as the label next to the password field "password".

At that point my interest in hacking had grown. So when we finally got cable internet and my own computer (the old one) MSN Messenger came around. I installed lots of stuff like flooders etc. Nobody I knew could do this and people always said; he is a hacker. Although it is not.

I learned about IP-address because we sometimes had trouble with the internet. So when my dad wasn't home he said to me. Click on this (command prompt) and type in; ipcondig /all. If you don't see an IP-address you should type in; ipconfig /renew.

Thats when I learned that every computer has a unique address and I started fooling around with hacking tools I found on internet (like; Subseven).

When I got older I had a new friend and fooled around with the hacking tools on his computer. Untill one day I went by my friend and he said; my neighbor just bought my old computer. The best part was that he didn't reinstall it. So we asked him to give us the "weird code on the website" his IP-Address and Subseven connected. It was awesome :'). (Windows firewall was not around back then and routers weren't as popular or needed)

At home I started looking up more hacking stuff and found a guide. I still remember it was a white page with only black letters like a text file. It said sometime like; To be a hacker you first need to understand programming. The website recommended Visual Basic 6 for beginners. I asked my parents to buy me a book about it and I started reading in the holliday.

It was hard for me but I really wanted to hack MSN accounts. When I got older I just played around and copy -> pasted code. I made my own MSN flooders and I noticed hacking isn't easy.

I kept programming and learned and learned. When I was 16/17 I started an education in programming. We learned C# and OOP (altho I hated OOP at first). I build my own hacking tool like "Subseven" and thats when I understood you need a "server" and "client" for a successful connection.

I quit the hacking because it was getting to difficult and after another education I'm now a fulltime back-end developer in C#.

That's my story in short :)

When there are no widely approved Swedish translations of big data terminology, such as "big data" itself. When discussing this kind of terms you have to resort to using the English words for them, which results in a horrible language mix, Swenglish.

I wonder, does one have to know English to code?
And does devrant auto translate other languages to English? Seems everyone here knows English wherever they're from.

For some reason, seeing source code in my native language (Czech) disgusts me and decreases my motivation to read through it.

Anyone else knows that feeling?

If naming classes, methods and variables in your (not english) native language seems like a good idea, please get another job.

Do you really have to redefine every word in the English language? 😂 #assembly

Why did I mix English and Swedish variable names?

So, my last rant here was 3 years ago, and i just signed in again to devrant to post this fucking shit.

There is this guy who is a Project Manager in my office, I haven´t work with him but he sits in front of me and i have to listen to his bullshit almost every fucking day. Anyways, the other day he was talking to some other guy (a PM, also) and he said something like this:

"Programming is the most overrated thing ever, everyone can do it, you could do it, i could do it just googling stuff, i could even replace almost every programmer in this office, it´s the easiest thing ever. a programmer couldn´t do my job even if his life depended on it ´cause they can´t talk, they can´t manage people, they can´t manage their own time, heck they can´t even manage to talk to each other. they´re just a bunch of incels who think they´re important and their job is shit anyway".

They don´t see us as human begins, they see us as necessary evil.

(apologize if i wrote something wrong. English is not my first language)

What does your language call @ ?

Write in format like this!

English : AT
Korean : 골뱅이 (Whelk)

Screw the Chief Technology Clown role...

I'm now officially Chief Babysitting Clown...

Skills I can teach you include the following:

- How to read JIRA tickets
- How to write JIRA tickets
- How to check colleagues' calendars
- How to define requirements in English and not some sort of technologically challenged caveman language
- How NOT to do any programming (since I don't have time for that anymore)

And many, many more! Inquire within!

Please Google, allow us to disable that retarded Google translate thing you've got going on the play store.

Seriously, 90% of the apps' short description are absolutely unreadable because they insist on translating it to my device's language even if no translating is available.

I know it's probably useful to some people (the ones who don't understand English but somehow understand the human language equivalent of spaghetti-code, which I suspect is not many), but this needs to be disable-able, it makes the experience of discovering apps extremely awkward.

TL;DR: A freehoster got a redesign!

I remember when I made "my own website" in wix and sitey. It sucked working with them for me. I hated having an ad for them fixed at the bottom of my screen. I hated WYSIWYG-editors and wanted to paste my own code, a pro feature.

Sometime later I found bplaced, a free german based (also English language) hoster. And I use it for all my "official" test project. My first ever published self-coded website is still on there.. When I want to show someone what I've been working on (locally) without putting it on my domain, I use their services. They always looked oldish like from 2000 but their redesign puts them at least in 2015 :D

Give 'em a shot if you want.
Sadly, I am not paid to say this. I just really like them.

Stougles of a developer whose native language is not English.

1 ANSI keyboard for dev
1 local ISO qertz keyboard for everything else with weird characters

Hi every developer! My name is Allen. English is not my native language so forgive me if I say something that does not make any sense. Let me tell you my story how I become a programmer. (I am still learning) My first computer was a DELL OptiPlex GX 720 desktop. My father bought it for our self-employee job. Before he allow me to use the computer, I used to sit next to him and watching what he do, what he click and what he gets. When he allow me to use the computer, I was slow at typing. One or 2 WPM (word per minute) my father taught me how to use the computer. Very slowly, my typing speed improves. I understand how to use the computer. but one day, I do what make me regret. I was playing with some executables, when I double clicking it, it does not work I used to associate files with apps. I associate music files with every player I want. So, I did what I used to, I associate exe files with windows media center! The computer started to open hundreds of windows media center (WMC for short) whenever an app is clicked, it opens windows media center. Today, I realized that windows were trying to open every app and every process that regularly run. However, since I associate it with WMC, instead of the app itself, it opens WMC some days after the mistake, I wonder how apps work and how I can create my own. My father  told me before that a program is simply a binary file that the computer can read. However, it was too advanced to me at the time.I begin my search with google. Everytime I search, it says "learn to code" or something like that. I see some C++ code but, it was disgusting. when I read just a few lines of a hello world code in java. it was too complex

What I seen

#$$#% $%&$%&*#!@

~

(&*%&$ (_(*^% #&&* (^^$(&^$%^( %^*$())

~

^$70^(`*#%`*#&%^)*!"   Hello world   "#@

~

~

The actual code:

class helloworld

{

    public static void main(String args[])

    {

         System.out.println("Hello World!");

     }

}

I look for an easy way but my attempts fail. then. I push

I to learn how to code.I try learning java. but it still

Very complex. i tried LibertyBASIC. from LibertyBASIC to

Java. after learning LibertyBASIC, it was easy!

LibertyBASIC -> Java -> Ruby -> NOW, C# and XAML

Today, I am learning C# and XAML.

My first OS                         :  Windows 7

My first Computer             :  DELL OptiPlex GX 720

My first successful click  :  The Start menu

My first used App              : Microsoft Encarta 2009

My first created App         : Hi-Lo(number-guessing game. written in LibertyBASIC)

Thankyou for reading this Long story.

 

Finally got approved to bring on a second developer for a three month project. Our vendor provided 12 of their "best" candidates, and we picked the only three that actually knew the programming language required to interview. Two did not speak sufficient English and the last one sounded perfect. Two weeks in, he quits and doesn't answer the vendor or us. No money in the budget to try again and I end up developing the entire thing myself. Five months later and I have finally finished.

Rant about social media in general, including devRant.

I enjoy interacting with like minded people. What I do not enjoy is the whole degradation of the conversation at hand. Sooner or later, someone takes something the wrong way, addresses something this social network was not meant to address (it's devRant not Facebook), and the audience has a multitude of English as a #(rd/th/whatever) language human beings.

Accept that as the premise, and I think we could get along a lot better.

However commonly this fact is ignored. Understand the sentiment behind statements, not the statement itself. If any part of it is unclear, then request clarification.

Agree, disagree, civil debates one thing, but degrading the conversation to name calling or similar emotions only results in poor communication, useless emotions running high, and nothing gained.

</rant>

It's OK. I can tell English is not your first language.

I am just thrilled about the new employees! They are so talented…

O-M-F-G!

Who hired these people!? It-is-incredible! (Actually, I know who hired them!) Just unbelievable amount of wasted time holding their hand on every step of the way. 10 years experience? I-think-not! This will not working out!

Don’t even speak understandable English. Just difficult to know what they are asking since they lack the basic principles of the english language.

Beginning of the end.

Imbeciles!

Many thanks to DevRant, finally i'm learning english "in the real world"

I'm always been incapable of learning language, but in return I know a lot of programming languages.
Can i choose a prog lang has my mothertongue?

So, I'm a Portuguese dude. I have my OS's in English language and Portuguese keyboard. Today, I spent 30 min raging at my computer because I couldn't login. I tried like all my 865725428 passwords (fake number, in case u don't get it) and still couldn't access it. Then I fucking looked and remembered Windows is an asshole and changed my keyboard input to English, so all my symbols were changed. Fuck you Windows, Linux never did this to me. Y the fuck would u? Do u like to fucking make me waste my precious time? Go and fuck yourself with a 35'' CAT-5E cable you prick.

So you know how a polite request may be phrased as a question, eg. "May I have seconds?". And how an appropriate answer for such a question may be a simple request, indicating the answerer's desire for the inquirer to be at ease, eg. "please do."?

So today my non-native ass had the following exchange:
her: "I'd love to keep you company but I have to call a friend who asked me dearly to call him back when I get home."
me: "please leave"

; :
Never used these as a kid.
Now can't do anything without 'em.

So today I got an email about a job opportunity. The email was in romainian. This is the exact translation and bear in mind that in romanian as in every other language (I guess) alot of english phrases sound very cringy. This is the email:

We need a fearless hero for the IT realm!
X company, a thriving insurance community, is looking for a real hero of software development that can make code using the .NET mystical hammer that can only be lifted by a worthy, deserving and responsible warrior.

You can't fly? Can't shoot lasers? You are not wasting your night time by looking at the moon on tall blocks wearing a cape? Then you could be the hero we need.

Do not worry, the position does not imply superhuman strength :)) However, it requires intellectual strength and attention to detail. You can even use your powers from a comfortable chair in a welcoming team full of other heroes ready to help you. We won't leave you alone, after all even Batman has Robin :))

I have attached all the information you need. Only The Chosen One can open the document so you will know immediately if you are right. :))

If you want to be responsible with your strength, then I'm waiting for your updated English resume with all your heroic deeds in the past.

Remember, not all heroes wear capes!

... WHAT THE FUCK IS .NET MYSTICAL HAMMER??? AND WHO THE FUCK USES ":))" IN AN EMAIL??

Your favourite comment?

My team was working on a legacy system, one part of it is an assistant, sadly required as global variables.

Being a non-english-first-language company, some dev years ago thought shortening said assistant to "ass" would be a wise idea - less to type, right?

When we redid the application 2016 part-by-part, our code needed to define 3-4 global variables starting with the "ass" prefix for the legacy parts to work. The colleague who was tasked with this is a fine gentleman from England.

Later as I read through the commit, I found 5 lines of code following 20 lines of comments explaining and deeply apologizing for "ass", "ass_open", etc.

The same dev also had a "HACK OF THE YEAR" comment he moved around when time constraints made a less-than-optimal fix necessary which was worse than the last "highscore".

How many "normal" people (we as programmers are special) languages do you speak/understand?

I know English, Italian, some French & Spanish and some Slavic language like Macedonia, Serbian, Croatian and Slovenian. What about you?

So, I wanted to find a new way to arrange my language's alphabet. Atm, I'm loosely using latin's system even though my system is weird;

A B K D E F G H I IE SH L M N O P R S T U V

So, I remember that another language (I think Japanese) uses a poem with every letter to figure the order of their letters, so I decided to do the same.

Only problem is: My current word list is very limited, some of the letters I needed only existed in specific words (aka, the word for "Dark") so I ended up making a very depressing poem.

Enjoy! Or not.. I'm not going to tell you what to do.

English translation below. I also will post images of it written in my language's script, as well as one line in my language's cursive script (I'm not doing the whole thing in cursive because fuck that)

Senarseha:

Seh ninfuat seh nem fieta; Seka sato nem fiekm juna jenes sermin.
Seh ninfuat sif nemsin netua niet; Seka sem sedma nemat sargo no
nrokniet sam fiekmin sehim sepra.

Sehim sinta nem nara niv nakliet.

Seh nem sine fieta.

English:

I say I am well; But all is dark before day begins.
I say it isn't too much; But this place is a farm of
preasure that blackens my soul.

My mind is ever in agony.

I am not well.

I presented a graduation relevant project this week.
We re maked our school website. Our teachers liked it, the most students liked it too.
But at the beginning I made wrong decisions.

The guy who should design it made nothing and at the presentation, he told that you need a pencil and eraser to design a website.
A "friend" of mine should do the HTML/CSS part but instead of finish it, he made a not working search bar in JS and was like "I made this, it doesn't work and we don't need it but give me attention"

I hate working in a group.

Sorry for spelling mistakes, English is not my native language.

WHY THE FUCK DO MY TEACHERS KEEP USING SHITTY TRANSLATIONS FOR PROGRAMMING CONCEPTS?! Like dude, everything related to programming is in english, just use the fucking terms in english for fucks sake. There are some words like "array" that fit into portuguese sentences without needing translation, so why translate it?

Why do you use acronyms in portuguese? People in the Database Systems class will later read a lot the acronym DBMS but won't know what the fuck that is because they teach the acronym SGBD, which is a translation.

It's so cringy and useless, so many terms the students will have to translate back to english when they get out to the real world because everything related to programming is in english.

"oh but what if the person doesn't know english" you don't even have to know english, just associate the concept (which will be explained to you in your language) with an english word. Also if you don't know english you'll have a very hard time, so I'd suggest taking english classes as your electives.

Ok I'm done, I got it out of my system.

That I am not good enough for this shit.

Recently left my job because anxiety, a lot of it.

Tbh, I should not burntout myself, because:
- salary was a shit
- the scrum was a lie, there was no end of the sprint, so no retrospective meeting ever done.
- They change the """sprint""" task pile at any moment, usually adding more tasks for the same sprint.
- previous project manager was an idiot who said "yes" at EVERYTHING the client asked, even if the request was outside tje scope of the project.

The project was heavily delayed, and I was the only developer left on the most hideous backend you can imagine (the code was just tje very definition of "what not to do"). NO UNIT TESTING at all.

My task: clean the mess so we have a """stable""" release (with the tests), add the new features and re-do the backend again, but this time properly.

8 months of develop for this shit and they wanted the stable-shit-backend in a month and the new backend in other month "because everithing was already done in the shitty one". Do not forget the new features too.

So, I was doing the imposible to try to do tje task, overdoing hours and reading the docs of the project (because I was new in it), but it take me.a lot of effort to simply correct bugs because of complexity of the code and not understanding fully some parts of the project.

Then the comments like "why this is not finished yet?" Or "I do not understand why this is taking so long"

So, I had poor sleep, I was anxious because my inhability to do the imposible and in the end, a feeling kind of defeated because I quit.

So... that.

Sorry if something is wrong typed or so, english is not my native language.

The story of how I got my dream job.

I was working for a company with a job I got just after graduating university. It was ok, not very exciting tech but I learned a lot by just surrounding myself with professional code monkeys. I was there for about a year when my company bought parts of another company and there was talk about people getting fired. This made me worried since I was the last one to get hired, so I started looking around for other jobs. I received this e-mail from a company saying they were looking for interns, what a coincidence! I adjusted my CV and sent it in.

--A few weeks pass--

It's Friday and I'm at a dinner party, it's 10pm and someone is calling me. I pick up and it's a recruiter from this company. I get very nervous but the alcohol helps me keep my cool, I pass the initial idiot test and they invite me for an interview. Yay!

I go to work on Monday and in a 1-on-1 and I tell my boss about the upcoming interview, he gives me a high-five :)

The interview is approaching and I'm feeling that I'm about to get sick, I refuse to believe this so I start taking a lot of medicine (painkillers, cough medicine etc.). I feel a bit better and thank the gods for medication.

--D-day--

I wake up, put on my nicest clothes and get on the train. I had one hour to spare just in case, which was well needed because the fucking train is late by 30 minutes. I'm still heavily medicated because of my ongoing fever. When I arrive I basically have to run there and somehow I manage to pick up a coffee on the way there which I devour in two seconds. I'm ready for the interview!

Some guy meets me in reception and the first thing he says is "My colleague doesn't speak our language so we'll have to speak english". This is fine, I speak good english but I was not prepared for this so it caught me off-guard and made me even more nervous. We get in and start talking. Things are going OK despite my numbed brain. I try to make eye-contact to make a good impression with the foreign engineer but he keeps staring somewhere which is making me nervous.

We get to the technical part on a whiteboard and this is where my brain decides to stop communicating. I'm presented a simple task which I'm struggling with finishing, and I feel the embarrassment coming over me. "NOOOOO THIS IS MY DREAM JOB, THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING!" I'm thinking to myself. After making myself look like a complete arsehole for some time we wrap it up and just before I step out the door I say to the engineer "You should checkout my Github page, I have lots of interesting stuff there" and he says "I'll be sure to do that" but I don't believe him.

I leave the office in fury (of myself) and make my way to the train station and even though it's the middle of the day I quickly devour two beers to calm my nerves and make me feel a bit better. I was so damn disappointed in myself, I wasted the opportunity of a lifetime! I go back home to my regular (now shitty) job.

--Two days later--

I get a call from an unknown number. I pick up the phone and it's the same recruiter guy. "So how did you think it went?" he says. "To be honest, I think it went really bad", I replied. "What? Really? Because they loved you, you got the job". (this was an obvious recruiter lie) "... wat, are you sure you called the correct person?" I said and he just laughed. The day after I quit my old job the whole department gets fired - such impeccable timing.

--A few months later--

I finish my internship and they want to keep me. I'm so happy. The engineer that was in the interview works on my team. I ask him "Why did you hire me? You know as well as I do that my interview was horrible". It turns out he _did_ look at my Github profile and that's how he knew I could write code. I also heard later that for my position there was about 2000 applicants and somehow I made the interviews.

I still work there today and I couldn't be happier (Sorry for the long text).

I started working for a company something around 1-2 months ago, they said because I don't have any experience with their stack, my salary will be lower than other team members. I said there is no problem and started my work. My first task was refactoring codes that their experienced programmers have wrote. My second task was extracting data layer from views. (They use Laravel and MVC architecture and they get data directly in views, not controllers). So, by end of the month when I talked with my boss I said I should get more money because I was better than your experienced programmers. He refused my request so I said I will not work with your team anymore :)
Anyway, never accept a job if you know you deserve more money than what they say will give you.

P.S: Sorry for my bad English. English is not my native language

I am not a native english speaker and the position I applied for required good spoken and written english:
Please use the english language to explain to a 5 years old the purpose of a semaphore.

Similar to other countries if you work in international projects and companies.

If you work for big government related / small domestic company projects you can meet with comments and variables named in native language instead of english.

Just because there are probably only 2-3 companies who win every government project, they take all money and pay shit to developers.
To meet requirements they mostly hire fresh graduates to do the job.
CEO of one of those most famous quote is: You can replace every developer with finite number of students.

FML, the day I dreaded has come!
We got a client that is from our country.. meaning they speak what I speak, but I do not type what they read..
I hate writing emails in my native language and with proper grammar.. I haven't done that since I finished with high school and they're full of typos.. Even after spellcheck and grammar check and everything it's faaaaar worse than my English.. fuzck!

Thanks fot this very informative email Samsung.

I have English set as my language and I live in sweden. WHY ARE ALL THE MAILS I GET FROM THEM IN KOREAN?

We should start with demystifying tech...
For most people, modern phones, tablets and pcs are magical rectangles...
The law of Clarke says, that every sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
And we have to tackle that.
In geography, we should talk about gps and glosnas
In English or foreign language lessons, we should speak about translator bots and language patters/abstractions
In physics, we have to understand the measurement devices
In politics, we have to speak about licenses of use, we have to speak about netneutrality as a political concept, we have to speak about snowden, shadow brokers, the vault, all the laws some shady imperial beauroticians pipe into our life.
Trojans used by the government and so on...
In cs concepts of operating systems, abstractions and networking should be taught, instead of using excel.
That could be done in math...
Well... No one should have to work with excel.
In maths they could use Wolfram alpha, rlang and gnupolt for example

Created 'GET STARTED' section in our application in English. It will guide new user to Highlight some App features.

End User started Posting screenshot of it in our feedbacks service : What this is?

Implemented 'GET STARTED' in local languages.

End user started posting screenshot of Language Drop Down, what this is?

Implemented 'GET STARTED' on Location based Language.

End User : I am here in Banglore seeing it in Different Language, my other Partners in Hyderabad are seeing it in different language. What this is?

Removed 'GET STARTED'.

End User : It was a nice feature. Why you removed it? What this is?

May be i over reacted but i am not bringing it back.

I was just wondering guys. If all developers speak English.

By speak English I mean easily able to communicate at a basic level because from what I know... all programming language had their base vocabulary in English language.

Just wondering!?

There are not enough words in the English language to describe how much I fucking hate general education courses and math.

I don't even want a CS degree anymore just to escape the hell that is called required general education courses.

Like why do I need two fucking lab based science classes? Sure, if you were doing the Computer Science with a focus in Chemistry, that makes sense. But I wasn't doing that.

Why do I even need a lab science of CS to begin with, let alone two.

Modern English is the JavaScript of natural languages:
1. Abundant, very popular
2. Influenced by god knows how many foreign concepts, historically, especially the modern / USA variant
3. The most popular second language
4. A failed attempt to replace it (and others) with more efficient Esperanto, which is a Dart of natural languages then

IF ONLY DOCUMENTATION WAS IN ENGLISH

In the past I've seen documentation that is great, and documentation that is conspicuous by it's absence.
Over the last decade, I've noticed documentation is getting WORSE.
I believe the reason for this is that those tasked with creating documentation have become so accustomed to the jargon in their own heads that they have LOST THE ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE IN ENGLISH, and as a consequence simply don't bother.
New terms such as "ThingamyJig" are defined as "A Collection of ThingamyJigs" — so you end up going round in circles and get back to square one.
They make little or no effort to provide simple examples.
If only companies who create languages understood that those who wrote the language may not be the best people to write the documentation.

== Internship Interview Rant ==

This is the weirdest interview I've been to to be honest because it wasn't really ABOUT ME. It's like the boss is not really interesting in knowing what I can do, what I am capable of doing. He asked me about my educational background for 5 minutes and started explaining about the startup for 45 minutes. He explained how he came up with the idea like it was a children's bedtime story. He explain what the job is, BUT he didn't mention what programming languages they use. All he said was it required knowledge about different programming languages. I tried asking but he seemed to dodge the question for some reason by saying everyone needs to know a little bit of everything. (Srsly i don't even know what to start learning for this) After listening to him talk and talk and talk and talk, he finally said "hey, think about it and send me an email if you are willing to take it up!"

He works with STUDENTS. The team is composed of him and 5 students. o.O They all seem so..... quiet in the office. Is that normal ???? Or like shouldn't everyone be kinda "interactive" sometimes?

So there is a girl working there too for 3 weeks now but SHE IS IN ROMANIA like wtf, gr8 then i guess ill be the only girl there but hey perks of being a girl, u get to be spoiled sometimes XD it happens a lot !

Internship ad ----> Main language: English
Me: *rages internally during the interview and thinks: BRUHH WHY ARENT U SPEAKING IN ENGLISH i prepared what I was gonna say in english for an hour*
I wonder if the code is in english or maybe its not :(( But I wish it were because it would be soooo much easier in english.

And there you go, I guess I have one week to find a better internship or decide to deal with this talkative boss. This isn't exactly a story of my last job cause my last job is totally non-dev related. This is a story of (maybe) my future job unless I actually find a better internship.

Fucking facebook researcher that make underfitted neural nets and fuck Mark that it's a marketing genius, the only idiot that can make news from a failure. The CEO of Tesla knows it and said Mark is not an AI expert. Bug not feature, it's only a poorly trained and poorly designed neural network having a bad representation of concepts, not a new language and not the fucking apocalypse. Google faced and solved the same issue when start ed using neural nets for zero-shot translations without using english as a translation bridge.

I saw a job I could apply, I matched all the requirements, 100%. Not only the bases requirements, but I also had almost all the extras, and the company was in my country and spoke my language, it's good for me since my English isn't perfect.

I didn't apply because I'll graduate soon and I want to focus on my degree.

I bet that when I graduate all my current knowledge will be obsolete and I'll no find any job - not even if I beg for it - until I starve. Do you want to bet a beer? I'm ready

Just tried to install the english language pack for Visual Studio 2015 Enterprise (the thousands of bucks edition). Well... the setup displayed "DEU" for german and later tried to switch to "EN" resulting in "ENU". First WTF moment.

But what really killed me was the error message... please restart the PC BEFORE the installation? Just wow.

Speaking of annoying stuff in coding. What the fuck is it with the localized error messages?

No. Fuck you. No. Give me the English version so I can google it and find answers from the huge English speaking community instead of the tiny community of my language.

I don't want to sound ethnocentric but is anyone else annoyed by having to correct the spelling of variable, class, table name, and other code after it was built overseas? I'm in a third round of combing consecutively deeper into the code to ferret out these misspellings so they don't go into production. Is it too much to ask that the freelancer who says he speaks and writes native English not then turn that work over to a subcontractor who clearly does not?

Group of IT students asked me for help on their thesis.

Them: Can you help us on our thesis?

Me: How much?

Them: $450

Me: Hmmmm. What language?

Them: English!

Me: WTF! Seriously? LOL!

Worst experience: being laid off when the startup I worked for lost a deal. I loved that project :(

Best experience: my new company sent me to USA for a few days to meet the client. I've gained a lot more of confidence on my spoken English. I've didn't use it in years, so I was worried. Perhaps you wouldn't think it's a "dev" experience, but English is actually a required skill for a developer who has it as a second language.

Hello world in different languages. Everyone can add a suggestion :) . No google translate!!! I give the first ones :)
Only one language per person! 😂

English: hello world

(I'll give some context before the rant: I'm part if the IT department of a manufacturing company (actually I'm 1/2 of the department), and all the applications (old an new - except the ones used on production line) used in the company are my responsibility, that including most of databases too... Also, English isn't my native language so there will be some words or phrases that I'll probably write wrong... Sorry for that, if there are any corrections, I'll be glad to hear them)

So...

There will be an implementation of new "control point" on the "shipping department" which consists on a electromechanical equipment controlled by a PLC. And despite the original concept was a collaboration between 2 departments (we, IT, and Production Control), I was never taken in consideration about anything of the project... To be fair, I forget about its existence until two weeks ago.

So, a few days I learned that there are a huge delay regarding the original deadline (mainly because the supplier was delayed with the delivery of their system), and since two weeks (less, actually, because some holydays in between) I'm learning how to integrate that "P.o.S" into an existing application on a PC using a serial communication (not the main problem, as I've done that before... With another brand of PLC's) while avoiding buying any additional software (to get the communication done and in a easy way) and that sort of things... But discovering in the process that it will be necessary to acquire such additional SW in order to finish the job ASAP.

When suddenly I get the "news" that it's almost all my duty (and responsibility) to meet the original deadline, because it doesn't matter how the other departments screw all the schedule, it's the job of IT to get the shit done in time... And what is worst: they didn't said that in such straight manner, no, the implied it while making a quick test with the general manager.

I mean, WTF? Besides doing a "respectable" number of "user support" activities in a dialy basis, I also need to manage the activities of other departments? And also fix their screw ups on a schedule that I just learned days before?

And also there is a coworker (one of whom screwed up) that, almost every time she see me, is asking "how much until you'll finish?"

As I read on a meme years ago: "please, give patience, because if you give strength, I'll need bail money too..."

Damn... I don't know of the benefits of this work are worth all this nonsense

You know what I god dam hate.

The likes of Microsoft, twitter and Github trying to change the English language and the definition of words based on your bad history.

How about, instead of banning words like Master branch and server slaves. You instead hand the language back to the English people and fix the spelling mistakes in all modern day programming languages!!!!

Talk about cultural appropriation!!

The English language.

Maybe my fascination with code that reads like a book comes from a desire for my code to be understood. Maybe it comes from novelty. But it really does send tingles down my spine when it reads like literature.

That's one of the largest reasons Lua is my favorite language and Java is one of my least favorite (sounds like a guy with a bad stutter, always repeating himself)

HOW. IN THE WORLD. COULD IT BE SO DIFFICULT TO COMMENT THE CODE I WRITE MYSELF ?

After my first project (you know, the "Working project I made for fun long ago" code everyone did once, but when you look at it again it looks like sorcery and there's no way to understand it ?), I decided that I'd comment almost everything I'd do... But...

When I begin a project, it's fiiiine and I do my comments the way they should be... AND THEN, WHEN DIFFICULTIES ARRIVES AND I START TO BE TIRED (ie : always) THEY START TO INCLUDE INSULTS OR WEIRD JOKES ABOUT THE PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE, MOVIES REFERENCES, AND SOMETIMES THEIR LANGUAGE VARIES. (Like, that project you're doing in English and suddenly there's a comment written in French in the middle of that)

Soo, yeah, even if I do comment my shit now, it isn't more helpful, lol. Maybe I should listen to relaxing music when I code err.

Oh, comments. Damn comments. Someday I'll do those correctly. Maybe.

I said “furrowing his little mouth brow” because I forgot the word “frowning”.

English is my first and only fluently spoken language.

So you heard from that awesome tool that apparantly everybody uses.

Go to the web page:
One single continuous page in 90ies style with random blahblah targetting expert users and various edge cases without context. Some lines about arcane build commands in an unfamiliar language.

Not even a single, comprehensive line, what it does, what it is good for, no minimal example or hint even how to run it.

So you write thousands of lines of dense code, but are not able to drop some first lines of plain, understandable english for people just visiting the first time? How hard could it be? Fuck you, srsly.

I have a built in NLU and NLP feature for English language within me.

And when I learn a new language, I am basically installing a new adapter.

What the hell is it with WordPress people. Just read a rant where this dude is calling himself a "developer" . What the hell you're not a developer stop calling yourself a developer. All you do is click and drag pictures into squares. And type plain English into text boxes. Using software thay an actual developer actually did develop. You don't see me on cook rant calling myself a cook you know why cuz I can't cook. Leave don't learn a respectable language and get back to me. And no HTML is not a language.

While studying business information technology (useless btw), we had to take these exams with Microsoft Office programs.

When it was time for Excel exam, we were given this sheet of instructions on what to do, and it even listed the exact functions you had to use.

The fun started when I realized that my Windows installation was in English, so my Excel installation was also in English. The instruction sheet and the functions listed in it were in my native language.

Because Excel is probably the shittiest thing ever made, this is the part where you know you are fucked. The functions listed in the instructions don't even exist in the English version (same goes vice versa btw), so what can you do?

You implement the fucking functions. Never used VB before that day, and never will again.

But I got a perfect score.

By far the biggest challenge is naming your classes and variables in your native language instead of using english. And obviously you end up with a hidious mix of english and native terms 😂

Who are you, developers who send out their cv in a word document and in a language that is not English???🤯 May I tell the HR to not pass any of those CVs to me?

Debug.Log(GetComponent<Greetings>().language = "English");

-> Hello there!

Hi everyone !
I'm following devrant from a while now, but just joined.
It's one of the best dev communities out there.
I don't usually post a lot on forums and stuff like that, but expect from me a lot of ++s :)

Also, English is not my main language, if i make any mistakes fell free to correct me

!dev

Joys of living in Switzerland:

We have four fucking national languages (english not included), with around 20 dialects of swiss german, most of us only know their origin language, yet stupid companies think we only speak one and assume it's fine to just send their filth in a language we may not understand.

Filter IPs and don't send your shit to regions that don't talk the language, or go and pay some translators (yes, they're expensive, but hey, you chose to sell/promote in Switzerland, deal with the fucking it). We are lazy and uninterested in your shit, so open your wallet if you want to reach us.

And it's not like I can't speak German, I'm just pissed for this inconsideration.

Ffs.

Hey guys, Today I created my first action on google assistant an it got deployed. I'm very happy and also I got the mail for the shirt. With 2 months I'll get it. I'm trying to make the action run in English and Hindi (Nation language of India) so that I can earn google home.

I'm a student at a cyber education program. They taught us Python sockets two weeks ago. The next day, I went home and learned multithreading.
Then, I realized the potential.
I know a guy1 who knows a guy2 who runs a business and could really use an app I could totally make. And it's a great idea and it's gonna be awesome and I'm finally gonna do something useful with my life.
All I gotta do is learn UI. Easy peasy.
I spent the next week or so experimenting with my code, coming up with ideas for the app in my head and of course, telling all my friends about it. Bad habit, I know.

Guy1 was about to meet Guy2, so I asked Guy1 to tell Guy2 about my idea. He agreed. I reminded him again later that day, and then again in a text message.
The next day, I asked him if he remembered.
Guess what.
I asked him to text Guy2 instead. He came back to me with Guy2's reply: "Why won't he send me a message himself?".
So I contacted Guy2. After a while, he replied. We had a short, awkward conversation. Then he asked why he should prefer a new app over the existing replacement.
He activated my trap card. With a long chqin of messages, I unloaded everything I was gathering in my mind for the last week. I explained how he could use the app, what features it could have and how it would solve his problem and improve his product. I finished it off with the good old "Yeah, I was bored😅" to make the whole thing look a bit more casual.
Now, all that's left to do is wait.
...
Out of all the possible outcomes to this situation, this was both the worst the least expected one.
I'm not familliar with the English word for "Two blue checkmarks, no reply". But I'm certain there is no word in any language to describe what I'm feeling about this right now.
By that point, Guy1 has already made it clear that he's not interested in being my messanger anymore. He also told me to let the thing die, just in case I didn't get the hint. I don't blame him though.

It's been almost a week since then. Still no reply from Guy2. I haven't quite been able to get over it. Telling all my friends about it didn't really help.
Looking back, I think Guy2 has never realised he has that problem with his product.
But still, the least he could do is tell me why he dosen't like it...
"Why won't he send me a message himself?" Yeah, why really? HMMM :thinking:

You know what? If I ever somehow get the guts to leave my home country, I'm sending a big "fuck you" to this guy.

We have been given two Spanish exchange students for 10 weeks. We are a UK based creative agency, the minor issue being they don't speak a word of English, so there is a significant language barrier.

What would people recommend for a way to help them learn some basic languages e.g HTML, CSS etc.. with such a significant language barrier.

(Already tried Google translating everything)
With my strong Yorkshire accent, my Spanish doesn't come out too great 👌

Who wants to play a game?
Let's play....
Is This Sexual Harassment!?!?

I won't publicly reveal who is the other person in this convo. I just want genuine opinions.

For reference, the convo started in another language, and quick mention of their fondness for my eyes... i simply ignored with 'lol' and chatted on and off for some hours... next time it was in english with use of " darling", which I simply stated wasnt something anyone who knew me would say.

they claimed it was just british... it's not. I actually use UK spellings due to working for years for UK based companies.

back in the other language... ' angel' , 'princess', *some equivalent of a small rabbit*,...me once again, more directly, asking why and saying no/they are irrelevant to me, to each.

the next part was hysterical, but to not out the person or skew opinions, that's being omitted.

the following came after me running out of time so it needed to be a call or i needed to mute them. they got muted.

SOOO,,,,

IS THIS SEXUAL HARASSMENT???

my dev friend/partner and I can't find the right term for wtf this is... which is odd as we both have an extensive vocabulary and are highly specific.

We had 1 Android app to be developed for charity org for data collection for ground water level increase competition among villages.

Initial scope was very small & feasible. Around 10 forms with 3-4 fields in each to be developed in 2 months (1 for dev, 1 for testing). There was a prod version which had similar forms with no validations etc.

We had received prod source, which was total junk. No KT was given.

In existing source, spelling mistakes were there in the era of spell/grammar checking tools.

There were rural names of classes, variables in regional language in English letters & that regional language is somewhat known to some developers but even they don't know those rural names' meanings. This costed us at great length in visualizing data flow between entities. Even Google translate wasn't reliable for this language due to low Internet penetration in that language region.

OOP wasn't followed, so at 10 places exact same code exists. If error or bug needed to be fixed it had to be fixed at all those 10 places.

No foreign key relationships was there in database while actually there were logical relations among different entites.

No created, updated timestamps in records at app side to have audit trail.

Small part of that existing source was quite good with Fragments, MVP etc. while other part was ancient Activities with business logic.

We have to support Android 4.0 to 9.0 of many screen sizes & resolutions without any target devices issued to us by the client.

Then Corona lockdown happened & during that suddenly client side professionals became over efficient.

Client started adding requirements like very complex validation which has inter-entity dependencies. Then they started filing bugs from prod version on us.

Let's come to the developers' expertise,
2 developers with 8+ years of experience & they're not knowing how to resolve conflicts in git merge which were created by them only due to not following git best practice for coding like only appending new implementation in existing classes for easy auto merge etc.

They are thinking like handling click events is called development.

They don't want to think about OOP, well structured code. They don't want to re-use code mostly & when they copy paste, they think it's called re-use.

They wanted to follow old school Java development in memory scarce Android app life cycle in end user phone. They don't understand memory leaks, even though it's pin pointed by memory leak detection tools (Leak canary etc.).

Now 3.5 months are over, that competition was called off for this year due to Corona & development is still ongoing.

We are nowhere close to completion even for initial internal QA round.

On top of this, nothing is billable so it's like financial suicide.

Remember whatever said here is only 10% of what is faced.

- An Engineering lead in a half billion dollar company.

Don't you just hate it when you have some of the best programmers in the office with you, but none of them can fucking spell! Imagine having to spend more time decoding comments than actual code

Intend to help a friend to find out what's wrong with a software installation in his laptop today...
But forgot that his Windows installed in Chinese version... how am I supposed to help.... (; _ ;)
I can't read Chinese... can't even find how to open Control Panel...
_________________________________
My native language is not English, but I always have all my techies set up in English.

It's absolute insanity when your mobile recharge expires, in India if you use Jio.

Every hour you get two SMSes, one in English and one in the local language asking you to recharge.

Flash SMS messages take up your screen if you have something on ur device out of nowhere.

If you call someone 3 days before your recharge will expire you get this automated voice lecture about how your recharge is going to expire within 3 days.

Insanity.

You know you fucked up when you have to finish your code for the 8 am and you are drunk in the street, point for me (sorry for the back bad English, I'm drunk and my language is the Spanish)

We have to use a 20 year old API that is half assed and doesn't even work right every time.
Every three months the same discussion comes up why something doesn't work that relies on that API. I have to explain the situation over and over again... And then my boss starts to give 'solutions' which we already use or are utterly stupid... >.<

In case someone is wondering: SOAP API on a Windows Server 2003 with timeouts every few minutes and XML output in a language that is not English (even the tags!).

I really don't mind it as long as the work is on track but damn it hurts to read the git commit messages with messed up spellings. In some cases it's not just that, but variable names, file names, etc. as well.

English isn't the first language in my country and a lot of people are not as proficient with it so it's probably not appropriate to judge, but the cringe is real.

Sometimes I wonder if I am that cringeworthy person to someone else.

I need to rant about life decisions, and choosing a dev career probably too early. Not extremely development related, but it's the life of a developer.

TL;DR: I tried a new thing and that thing is now my thing. The new thing is way more work than my old thing but way more rewarding & exciting. Try new things.

I taught myself to program when I was a kid (11 or 12 years old), and since then I have always been absolutely sure that I wanted to be a games programmer. I took classes in high school and college with that aim, and chose a games programming degree. Everything was so simple, nail the degree, get a job programming something, and take the first games job that I could and go from there.

I have always had random side hobbies that I liked to teach myself, just like programming. And in uni I decided that I wanted to learn another language (natural, not programming) because growing up in England meant that I only learned English and was rarely exposed to anything else. The idea of knowing another fascinated me.

So I dabbled in a few different languages, tried to find a culture that seemed to fit my style and attitude to life and others, and eventually found myself learning Korean. That quickly became something I was doing every single day, and I decided I needed to go to Korea and see what life there could be like.

I found out that my university offered a free summer school program for a couple of weeks, all I had to pay for was the flights. So a few months later I was there and it was literally the best thing I'd done in my life to that point. I'd found two things that made me feel even better than the idea of becoming the games programmer I'd always wanted to be. Travelling and using my other language to communicate with people that I couldn't in English. At that point I was still just a beginner, but even the simple conversations with people who couldn't speak English felt awesome.

So when I returned home, I found that that trip had completely thrown a spanner into my life plan. All I could think about after that was improving my language skills and going back there for as long as possible. Who knows what to do.

I did exactly that. I studied harder than I'd ever studied for anything and left the next year to go and study in Korea, now with intermediate language skills, everyday conversations no longer being a problem at all.

Now I live here, I will be here for the next year and I have to return to England for one year to finish my degree. Then instead of having my simple plan of becoming a developer, I can think of nothing I want to do less than just stay in England doing the same job every day, nothing to do with language. I need to be at least travelling to Korea, and using my language skills in at least some way.

The current WIP plan is to take intensive language classes here (from next week, every single weekday), build awesome dev side projects and contribute to open source stuff. Then try to build a life of freelance translation/interpreting/language teaching and software development (maybe here, maybe Korea).

So the point of this rant is that before, I had a solid plan. Now I am sat in my bed in Korea writing this, thinking about how I have almost no idea how I'm going to build the life that I want. And yet somehow, the uncertainty makes this so much more exciting and fulfilling. There's a lot more worrying, planning and deciding to do. But I think the fact that I completely changed my life goals just through a small decision one day to satisfy a curiosity is a huge life lesson for me. And maybe reading this will help other people decide to just try doing something different for once, and see if your life plan holds up.

If it does, never stop trying new things. If it doesn't (like mine), then you now know that you've found something that you love as much as or even more that your plan before. Something that you might have lived your whole life never finding.

I don't expect many people to read this all, but writing it here has been very cathartic for me, and it's still a rant because now I have so much more work and planning to do. But it's the good kind of work.

Things aren't so simple now, but they're way more worth it.

Today i was trying to solve a problem on my graphs algorithm (find the shortest path) but i was not able to do almost anything, so i asked for help to a friend.

He started to try to help me, but after a long reasoning we both stopped to understand what we were doing.

After a while, i've decided to run the code totally random and... it worked! And that's not all, it worked better than we were trying to do!

What a lucky shot😎
(Sorry if there are some errors, english isn't my first language)

I find it way easier to read code than ordinary text.

Am I the only one? Do I have a problem?
After the first sentence my I eyes can't focus to keep reading text. This also happens to my native language except from English.

Apparently Russia is getting in on the "English title and description, foreign language audio" clickbait.

You would think the YouTube team would realize they could use their auto-captioning AI to solve this problem and detect when it happens 🤔

Hi ppl of devRant! I’m not really a dev but I love reading your rants :) I decided to post my first rant because I think I could use some advice from you.

Background: I’m a student just finished my first year at uni. Earlier I applied for a developer intern just for fun and somehow magically got in. However, I'm a statistics major (not even CS!) and only know basic java stuff. I guess they hired me because I speak ok english and a little french? I live in a non-English speaking country but the company has a lot of foreign customers.

The problem is, the longer I stay, the more I feel that they only hired me out of charity *sobs* There isn’t much for me to do, and most of the time I couldn’t understand what my co-workers are doing so I can’t really help them either. Plus, they don’t seem to need my language skill as much, so I kinda feel useless here.

It’s my 5th (maybe already 6th?) week here and the only thing I did was fixing an itty bitty bug that literally needed only one additional line of code. Yes it took me a while to set up the environment, learn js from scratch since they use js for this project, and locate the issue but I’m pretty sure it’d probably take someone who’s familiar with the project, like, 3 mins? And now that I’ve fixed it and the merge request was passed, I’m out of work to do again. I talked to the lead and he pretty much just said “read more of the code”. Guess I can do that. I’ve spent like 4 days going through the code but is this really promising?

I want to spend time on learning actual stuff rather than yet another resume ornament. So what should I do? Should I ask for more help/more work to do, or keep learning on my own (I’m quite interested in algorithms, maybe I could make use of my time to study that?), or even leave?

Sorry for the long rant. I know ass-kicking devs probably hate useless, underqualified ppl at work in real life but believe me it really hurts to be one and I hate myself enough already so I’d appreciate any thoughts/advice :/

Why the fuck do people at certain universities and colleges think they have to translate programming related expressions? They sound extremely stupid and often misleading for someone who studied CS in English.

I had an interview recently at a company where the interviewer, who most likely studied at one of those unis, asked questions in our native language and I had to ask for clarification multiple times because of this shit. Now they probably think I'm not even familiar with some of the basics. 😤

I conducted my first "technical" interview today. Let's just say the chap needs to brush up on his terminology...

Q: What's a class and an object? And what's the difference between each?
A: Ummm... Errr... The one holds static information and the other can change its values.

OK, in his defence, he was nervous and English isn't his first language either, but then brush up on your terminology at the very least so that you can speak the lingo when asked questions about programming.

I’m not a native english speaker.. had lots of interviews but all rejected me... I guess I was not good at delivering or explaining things... is this language barrier really is important.. working in canada

I absolutely hate software to the point where I started converting from sysadmin to becoming more like a dev. That way I could just write my own implementations at will. Easier said than done, that's for sure. And it goes both ways.

I think that in order to be a good dev, you need these skills the most:
- Problem solving skills
- Creativity, you're making stuff
- Logical reasoning
- Connecting the dots
- Reading complex documentation
- Breaking down said documentation
- A strong desire to create order and patterns
- ...

If you don't have the above, you may still be able to become a dev.. but it would be harder for sure, and in some cases acceptance will be lower (seriously, learn to Google!)

One thing I don't think you need in development is mathematics. Sure there's a correlation between it and logic reasoning, but you're not solving big mathematical monsters here. At most you'd probably be dealing with arrays and loops (well.. program logic).

Also, written and spoken English! The language of the internet must be known. If it's not your first language, learn it. All the good (and crucial) documentation out there is in English after all.

One final thing would be security in my opinion, since you're releasing your application to the internet and may even run certain services, and deal with a lot of user data. Making those things secure takes some effort and knowledge on security, but it's so worth it. At the most basic level, it requires a certain mindset: "how would I break this thing I just made?"

I'm still in school and everyone in my class knows that I'm some sort of a computer/tech guy. And whenever the teacher has some problem with any of their devices everyone turns to look at me expecting that I would know the solution. Even when it's like when the device is not connected to the school wi-fi. Like how am I meant to know your wi-fi password. (And sorry for any misspellings. English is not my first language)

In my opinion, russian nation's chronic inability to fight oppressive regimes is partly attributed to one interesting quirk the russian language has.
When talking about injustice committed against someone, or making threats to commit said injustice, the actor is completely omitted.
Here's an example:
“Надо будет — найдут”, roughly translated to “they could find you if they wanted to”, is a common phrase to use when talking about proxies, VPNs and other online privacy measures. But the word “they” in English translation is nowhere to be found in the original text! Let's examine the literal translation:
- “надо будет” — “the need will arise”
- “найдут” — “will find you”
The English phrase “they could find you if they wanted to” can be easily challenged with a simple question: “Who's they?” The government? The corporates? The regime? The CIA? Who exactly?

English language can mimic that with passive voice: “you are being watched”, “you are an easy target”, etc. But in active voice, you can't avoid using “they” or some other actor.
In russian, you can. And you will. Indeed, this is how russian people converse. It's a very specific, very common pattern that never really changed.

It's a very powerful thought-terminating cliché built straight into the language. You can't fight an enemy that has no name and no word to describe it, not even a euphemism. The very language you THINK in prevents you from analyzing the entities that oppress you.

In a Tom Scott Plus video where he tried tightrope walking, he learned that they don't say the “F-word” — “fall”. You can't say “I'm afraid I'll fall”. You have to find more specific alternatives like “I'm afraid I'll lose balance”. The word “fall” in this context is a thought-terminating cliché. There is no going back after you “fall”. But if you “lose balance”, you can “regain balance” — the lack of a thought-terminating cliché promotes problem-solving.

Russian language is the same, but in soviet russia, language terminates you, I guess.

Update on my devRant client SwiftUIRant:

I’m experimenting with some UI changes compared to the official app.

* vote buttons are laid out horizontally and placed above the rant to not waste space on the left side.
* comments count shows 0 comments instead of disappearing.
* rants are not cut off but visible in full length (I plan to add a toggle setting for that)
* creation date/time is present in the feed
* date/time formatter uses the current system region and the language english. So no more awkward American dates for non American users.

What do you think?

What is it with this bullshit culture about installing something syncs it with all machines
First chrome/chromium, You can't install a plugin or extension on 1 machine unless you're logged out. what is this bullshit

Next windows 10, I fucking installed a Japanese language pack on 1 machine, by the end of the day all my fucking machines and even my windows tablet got it installed and applied in a fucking bugged way that made it that my UI is English and my fucking metro apps are Japanese.

This is starting to get annoying as fuck

All Chinese who write github codes in English and comment on code in Chinese. Please please stop. Use one language.

Isn't it weird that the name James is not Jame but James? Because I would assume James would be the plural of Jame because what if there are two people with the name James in the room... Would we say
"There are two Jameses/James's/ jamessis"...
Also if it's James's wouldnt that be for nouns etc like James's bag....
Sorry this has been bothering me for two days.
I asked this in office and people thought I had lost the plot so I AM AWARE IM CRAZY.

Ready for another look into my JIRA life?

Ticket Title: "The 'Selected photos' setting will result in users being able to select only one photo at a time."

Ticket Description: "This is not directly a bug, because this problem is caused by the selected setting. Here one would have to consider to give this option no more and/or with an error message the user on it to make attentive, how he can change the attitude."

I don't even have to worry about NDA in this one because it makes absolutely no sense.

BTW, we don't have a single text in the app with the words "selected photos"

99% sure the creator of this ticket wrote it when they were high, drunk, or both

If you ever think you are useless, remember there is a language change option on Fast.com.

It even has UK and US English variant.

breakthrough moment

just realized, when reading english books; my brain makes a conversion to my native langauge.

and instead doing conversion, if I articulate the information in the english language itself, I seem to understand better.

Got an update for Firefox 😊 ->
Updated Firefox 🎉 ->
Got a sticky popup that asks if I would answer 3 review questions, why not? 🙄 ->
Went to a fucking website that uses my fucking IP to identify my fucking language automatically, and the result is the one you can see in the image,
half fucking German and half fucking English,
meanwhile I'm the turd from fucking Italy!

Firefox, I didn't knew you like it 🤬 black (pattern(UX))

Message for ALL, take my example and WHENEVER THERE'S A TURD THAT SUGGESTS TO IMPLEMENT THE fucking LOCALIZATION BASED ON IP ADDRESSES, SAY THAT IT DOESN'T WORK, NEVER WORKED(not my first time elsewhere on the web) AND NEVER FUCKING WILL 😤

It has been a while since my last tale. I think it was about me starting a bootcamp...

Well, a lot of things happen since that:
• I did the bootcamp: three months of code-sleep-code, but now I know a bunch of new stuff.
• I gained my passion/love for develop again.
• Made new friends.
• IDK how became the CTO of a startup (which failed, shame, but I did learn a lot of new stuff again. Plus it wont failed because of the tech side (damn business not doing his business part...)) for about 6 months.
• And next week I will start at a new job (yaaay, income again!): they give me a nice 2k laptop, work from home if I want, nice salary...

So, I think I am ok.

PD: Sry if something I write is wrong, english is not my native language.

Imagine seeing words like developer:ess, member:esses or user:ess in artices on the web becoming more and more popular.

Pretty dumb, yes?

That’s what happening right now with the German language with something called gender-language.
It hurts my eyes reading Entwickler:innen, Mitglieder:innen and Benutzer:innen.

People argue that words like Entwickler are excluding woman by using the male form by default. But it’s just a matter of perspective. Why not just define this as the neutral form just like in english? Developer is neither male nor female. Everybody is fine with that.
Yet the Germans are messing around with this gender shit and making text unreadable for no reason at all.
It’s just bullshit!

Fucking multilanguage mind.
My language capability is literally splitting in half making me more and more retarded/incapable in both languages (my native and English).
The main reason is that my daily reading and listening is mostly in English(and happen online) meanwhile I work and have to interact at the job in native language, which is much less demanding of native language interactions because I code in silence 😣

If only the native language content was as good and as interesting as the English one, but Italy doesn't an alternative to hackernews, FUCK ME

Language barriers are so frustrating. x.x

Trying to talk to a fellow ranter, and english isn't his native language. It's fine, I'm managing though.
Have you guys ever just sat and thought about how interesting language is? As I sit here and type, the very words i write were hand crafted to simplify communication. Spoken language itself was developed over of thousands of years. It really makes you think.

So I started working at a large, multi billion dollar healthcare company here in the US, time for round 2,(previously I wasn't a dev or in IT at all). We have the shittiest codebase I have ever laid eyes on, and its all recent! It's like all these contractors only know the basics of programming(i'm talking intro to programming college level). You would think that they would start using test driven development by now, since every deployment they fix 1 thing and break 30 more. Then we have to wait 3 months for a new fix, and repeat the cycle, when the code is being used to process and pay healthcare claims.

Then some of my coworkers seem to have decided to treat me like I'm stupid, just because I can't understand a single fucking word what they're saying. I have hearing loss, and your mumbling and quiet tone on top of your think accent while you stop annunciated your words is quite fucking hard to understand. Now I know english isn't your first language and its difficult, I know, mine is Spanish. But for the love of god learn to speak the fuck up, and also learn to write actual SQL scripts and not be a fucking script kiddie you fucking amateur. The business is telling you your data is wrong because you're trying to find data that exists is complex and your simple select * from table where you='amateur with "10years" experience in SQL' ain't going to fucking cut it. Learn to solve problems and think analytically instead of copy fucking pasta.

Please tell me why my boss thinks instead of just implimenting a language picker, it's a good idea to:

1) store the browser's language option in the DB only for new users, but only the first time they log in, never again.

2) never give existing users the ability to change language, and just default them to English.

3) deal with all upcoming language change tickets by having devs manually do DB updates ON THE LIVE PROD DB.

I'm screaming.

So just babbling my shit down here.

(Tldr : i am a crazy guy who followed my half slept brain, went onto a stage , gave some kind of motivating , stammering talk to a large group of professional strangers, enjoyed that day with a red embarrassed face and just got my first pic of me speaking on stage and that is so awesome !)

Last Saturday i went to a gdg meetup and i embarrassed the hell out of me.

I went there with just 2 hours of sleep from the previous night.
After a few talks there comes a guy who is taking some time to install is setup and the host calls for lightning round session ( ie he asks if anyone from the audience would like to share something about their product or something).

I am a fucking nutt guy. I can explain something to you nicely in a hacky way as long as i have done enough work on that and you speak my native language.

But giving a talk on English stage, hell no! I stammer, mix hindi with English and start speaking werd shit.. And that's what happened.

I don't know what went into me but as some guy went to the stage and talked for 2 mins, i was like yeah i want to do that too. So in next turn when he asked for a show of hands, i raised mine and fucking went to stage!

I forgot that if you go on stage you should have something to talk to . But the moment i was on stage, i was like... "Nope, we will do this differently".
I had been working on a video ads module from the last week which could be easily explained in 2 mins. But i felt like giving a non techy talk instead.

It went something like this: i introduced myself with my experience details ( who gives experience details on stage !?!) Then host said to speak loudly and i went like "Bharat mata ki jai!"( Victory to mother india (wtf!?😆) .

Then started talking about how the developers feel disheartened when searching on internet where the resources are scattered . And the solution i told them was :"don't be disheartened. You will eventually find it (like wow dude wtf, as if they didn't knew that) . Look on the youtube and other resources " and then went full on explaining/marketing about some online tutor who gives advice/consultancy via a subscription based payment ( tbf that guy really helped solve a lot of my doubts, he has written books on Android dev and is the top so answerer for Android).

Then i went on sharing my thoughts live on that fuckin stage ! ( Live because i usually post my thoughts here on devrant before discussing them out with real people, you guys are my safe space) but there i discussed my thoughts on libraries!

I have this believe that Android devs these days are having lesser knowledge of the system because we have all the libraries and templates available to us. But when we have to customize stuff, we need to go deep into docs and source classes and find ourselves in trouble there. So i kind of said this out loud and that we should try to read more the code and implement stuff ourselves instead of using the library 😅🙈)

I was feeling so fucking embarrassing after that all stuff! It was so full of stammering , broken English and worst attempt at motivation. At that time i was regretting this and about to burst cry and run away, but somehow i gathered my self, got my mood back to the event games and talks, later went to the organizers and apologized(and they were very nice and didn't cared about it), and overall enjoyed my weirdest day!

When i came home, my mom gave me a little more confidence about it. Now i think i shouldn't be that much instinctive. Next day i went hack to work and everything got normal.

But Yesterday i found a link to the public repository of the photos. Ohh fuck, someone had took my image! and that was too in full hd!!! 🙈🙈🙈😅😆😆 Oh mann I can't stop looking at that cool stage speaker image, i love it ! I, the shy-est and the most uncool awkward person , present on the stage with a mike, oof , i think i lived my dream !

I hope i could get enough confidence and speaking skills to take a real stage talk next time ( and maybe enough interesting talks and confidence to talk with girls of our office, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

This basically is me rambling all my thoughts that have been clouding my mind.

Learning other programming languages after learning the first is harder than I expected. I learned python first but that's making learning others (which I know arent similar but ) C, ES6, PHP, etc. I need to figure out what makes each one special and get a proper path instead of learning them all the same way. Which is easier for the web dev languages but fuck man I just need a good path for them and I'm good. Like learn this this this this that and that and I've got a basic understanding of the language I dont need to stress and I can casually build my knowledge from here now that I understand all this. Cause I love programming and I want to be the best I can be and just get to the level I am with python. And at some point I have to learn about basic electronics and learning how to program Arduinos with C so I can do stuff with that because I really really REALLY want to.

It doesnt stop there. I want to learn another language and no I'm not talkin bout programming anymore I mean I wanna learn Japanese and German (but japanese primarily) but it doesnt help that I'm always either in school, studying, programming, or playing games. I just cant find time to practice Hiragana&Katakana (two basic writing systems in japan) and it doesnt help that I'm a lazy procrastinating piece of shit that doesnt have or can keep a proper schedule and hell I barely can English and Its my native tongue. Ugh. Itd be better if I had a native speaker to help me tbh.

And finally I want to learn basic pixel animating I have dreamed as a kid to do some kind of animation and programming and I want to do both for games I want to program for fun but it doesnt help that I cant draw sprites or anything for shit. I cant get it and I just am fucked but I'm going to ask some people I know and a few subreddits for advice/help/resources with that

Welp that was the Bubbles Power Hour none of you probably are keen followers of mine and if I had any I'd be shocked and honored but thanks for reading anyways and any advice on anything is always appreciated!

So, we are many people from many countries, with many native languages, but we post in english because it's common.

To anyone posting here in another language than english:

أنت لست وحدك أيها النرجسي الحقير، تافه يعتقد بلده و لغته مركز العالم

See u

So I decided to run mozilla deep speech against some of my local language dataset using transfer learning from existing english model.
I adjusted alphabet and begin the learning.
I have pc with gtx1080 laying around so I utilized that but I recommend to use at least newest rtx 3080 to not waste time ( you can read about how much time it took below ).

Waited for 3 days and error goes to about ~30 so I switched the dataset and error went to about ~1 after a week.
Yeah I waited whole got damn week cause I don’t use this computer daily.

So I picked some audio from youtube to translate speech to text and it works a little. It’s not a masterpiece and I didn’t tested it extensively also didn’t fine tuned it but it works as I expected. It recognizes some words perfectly, other recognize partially, other don’t recognize.

I stopped test at this point as I don’t have any business use or plans for this but probably I’m one of the couple of companies / people right now who have my native language speech to text machine learning model.

I was doing transfer learning for the first time, also first time training from audio and waiting for results for such long time. I can say I’m now convinced that ML is something big.

To sum up, probably with right amount of money and time - about 1-3 months you can make decent speech to text software at home that will work good with your accent and native language.

I wrote three posts for a tech writing website - all of which were well researched, well formatted, and I figured, pretty relevant to most people working in software, right

The website decides hmm, we won't promote the posts at all - no retweets, nothing. So they all get about 100 views each within the first few days. Sad.

Meanwhile, one article written in basically BULLET POINTS gets pinned to the frontpage, and another article written in the most pajeet English I have ever seen containing factually wrong information (HTML is not a fucking programming language) gets retweeted and publicized and ends up with thousands of views

Why even fucking bother

*Dev is non-native english speaker

Dev: we need the VPN ip.
Me: the server ip or the connected device ip.
Dev: the server.
Me: gets the ip.
Dev: this doesn't work, is this the VPN ip ?
Me: Gives the device ip. Works.
Dev: OK. Works now.

Could have just asked for the client IP in the first place but s/he didn't know how to.

I have been trying to freelance for people who don't speak english as a first language and getting the Requirements is the hardest part of the job. 😫 .

P.S. Suggestions needed from remote freelancers. What's your workflow like.

The actual struggle of working in a non-english team who prefers to keep their variables named in our native language. Currently trying to think of a better way to phrase 'sjaafoerAerend' as dropping any part of it makes it more vague.

Is this a thing in asian countries as well? I'm guessing it's more common to just stick to english naming there.

I figure it's safe to assume that anyone who will see the code are going to be proficient in english. If they aren't, natively named variables isn't going to make a difference. Hell I even write my personal reminder comments in english.

No best story, but definitely a worst human to ever exist. The first day of can class, I asked this guy what language we would be using, and he sincerely said "English". This man thought I was referring to that, legitimately. Never for one second did he think that I meant programming languages, since we ARE in a cs class. He then said that for programming languages he wanted to do Python and or html. I lost all respect for him the first day.

Yesterday I had to register my new credit card with a national payment app (MobilePay) and it kept giving me error 32, which says "a technical error happened please try again"... Real fucking useful u peace of shit app 😠

Turns out, after a bit of research, that it will sometime crash if you language is not set to a european language. Guess what? I had mine set to English... English (US)... 😧

Like, what the fuck is that? Why would you check if a person might be from EU, be checking the language setting?
Get your shit together 😑

So some of @ewpratten's rants just inspired me to tell my story of a somewhat ignorant teacher.

So we had an english class, it was abou Nelson Mandela or something, but I was sitting and learning about apache2(well I first learned about ncurses in python but since there was a command for restarting the apache server it got me curious, as usual). When she said something along the lines of(translated from.my language): "Then you read the text about Nelson Mandela, but other people are programming!". I was about to say that I was actually not programming, but setting up an apache server, but that would have been a dick move since she at least didn't accuse me for hacking.

Answering a question on Stackexchange. The OP accepts your answer as correct. Then seeing someone correcting your English Grammar on the answer. That someone happens to be Drupal and English language moderator at the same time...fucking awesome.

Since day 1, I've been eager in learning everything dev-related in English, and as it, I've focused on thinking, writing, shitting and eating english for a basis.

Now, where I work, I say, our country native language it's Spanish, but I feel bad whenever they tell me I must write everything in Spanish (code included). Maybe I'm overreacting or something.

So, here's my question for you, devs, when you're working on a coding-related project, should it be on English or not?