New kid came to me in my break (while I was playing LoL) saying I should start coding (he had no clue what my role within the company is).
Said that if I won't get a career in league, I could just (as if it's done in a few minutes) learn coding and make a website with thousands of users (as if that is just done like 1 2 3).
Then with a big grin on his face he proceeded to say "if you ever have some issues with making websites, I could just come to him and he can teach me the basics of Javascript, HTML, CSS and PHP".
So I said: "and who are you?"
He told me his name and what he is going to do within the company.
So I said with a big grin on my face: "Ah, so you're the new kid the boss told me about, nice to meet you, from today on, I'll be your Senior."
I then saw his big grin disappear
then with a big smile on my face I proceeded to say: "If you ever have some issues, please come to see me and I'll be happy to teach you the basics of Javascript, HTML, PHP and CSS"

Then he walked away :^)

When my boss said that one language is better than others because it's being used by big company

>get hired at new company
>so big nobody knows anybody
>buy ancient company swag on ebay and put it at your desk
>everyone thinks you're a ten year

Manager asked for access to server with admin rights for a third party contractor and I questioned him... His answer?

- Your are gonna give access to anyone that needs access.

I gave. Went for a 15 days vacation.

Our server got blocked by our cloud provider because of ssh brute force attempt coming from it and the company website went offline during a big ass meeting because of that.

Made me giggle :)

He went up to the boss, dragged a big white board into his office.

Wrote company name, drew a big d**k pic on it.

Circled the d**k's head, wrote boss' name and drew an arrow pointing to the circle.

Titled the board reason for me leaving.

Last I heard, they filed a case against him. Not sure about the outcome of it.

My friend silently quited his job. He simply stopped coming to work and that is OK, because his contract expired last Monday. He worked for very bad company, where everyone was braging about how awesome dev they are and know everything better than him. Since company forgot to talk with him about contract renewal or to find a replacement, they are now in big troubles because braggers broke production and none know how to fix it :)

Password complexity checker for big car rental company is set to insane mode
☑️ 30 char
☑️ symbols
☑️ numbers
☑️ upper & lower
❎ still 'too weak'

CEO hired graphics designer without HR help after first meeting and that person first day of his work borrowed money from people and that’s not end of story.

Same guy came back at night and robbed the workplace with his friends, didn’t came back to work. Company bought couple of big iMac for new graphics department back then, all gone.

When company reported incident to Police it turned out he travel and steal from companies all over the country and they’re trying to catch him for a year.

Apparently I, the Intern, am the only developer at this company with any experience with Version Control. My Boss just asked me for 'Documentation on how to create a Repository in GitHub'...

"There's a big button that says 'Create Repository'. CLICK IT."

FINALLY, RESIGNED! Am leaving such a fucked UP "big" corporate company and starting my own business! Wish me luck!😔😔

Found this in a API from a big company. NDA prevent me from telling the name.
if(index < 1024 && index > 1024)

So... some guy at the company I work for complains to software dept that we've broken his app.

He's saying we've removed the drop down list from this field he uses....

We're all like... there's never been a drop down list there?!

it escalates and some big-dogs get involved. One of us has to go out and see him. Turns out the "drop down list" was his browsers saved autocomplete history, and he had changed browsers.

Asshole.

Today i've met a big customer of our company

He was absolute friendly and gave me clear requirements without oppositions...

Then I woke up.

I made an automatization bot for a big company from my town (freelance). Today I had to shut it down because I've been waiting 3 weeks for my payment (they only had 5 days after finishing development to pay)

Fuck the fucking client, fuck this fucking shit

-Online coding interview on Friday for a big company i reeeeaallly want to get into.
-Decides to take a two day leave to prepare.
-Power out the whole day.
😒😒😒

Best: Got a job at a rather big company, totally unqualified. They wanted me to start working on an android app to help maintain safety in their manufacturing halls using beacon/ibeacons technology. I had never made an android app, nor worked with gui. All by myself, I created the app and its necessary back-end logic. They were so impressed they wanted me back during the holidays or whenever i have the time, as I'm still studying.

Paypal Rant #2

Paypal might just be the only company with 98% of their employees being support staff because not a soul on this planet knows how to work with that fucking piece of shit of a company's service.

No really, if there was a shittiness-rating from 1-10 (10 = worst) you would have to store paypal's rating as a string or invent a new data type because no CPU could fucking work with such a big ass fucking number.

If I had to choose between Paypal and going back to manually trading physical goods/animals for stuff I would gladly choose the latter, because Paypal, go suck a bag of dicks you useless fucking shitpile of a "company".

My very first rant. I will try to make it count!

Recently my company had restructured with new GM who fired those who he didn't like and hired those who he did.

All ok I guess. And then...

We did a project for a big sportswear brand, interactive installation using WebSocket. My team developed the server with game engine and we also developed "shell front-end" with example code how to connect and interact with server.

Then we realized that our company was actually not hired by sportswear brand, rather by GM buddy-from-the-army tech vendor, who was hired by actual client.

Then, we also realized there is another company, that GM hired as freelancers, sitting at our office doing 'something'. And this 'other company' actually has same employees and address as GM's buddy company (meaning they are one entity with two names).

So.. what happened is that we get paid by party A, then we pay exactly the same amount to party B (which is actually same party A), and at the end... all our work was for free.

And then, this GM tells me I have to fire 2 developers from my team because we don't have enough business.

How did this guy even get to a position of this level?

I am leaving my job from a very big company with very high paying package for doing my own startup.
1 month notice period on.

Recently my company worked in project with a big international company which uses a crazy framework to build a part of there webpage. This framework only used random IDs and class names and not even different html elements. And to completely freak out all elements are positioned absolute and on every change the whole page go rendered.

Was working in small startup with great people on new projects, but for very low salary and shitty conditions.

Changed job to big company with nice salary and great conditions, but people are assholes and have to work on legacy stuff mostly.

Guess you can't have everything.

Got an all expenses paid trip to the Bahamas as part of a company recognition initiative. They rewarded me for a database and website that made a series of books searchable by key learning attributes and resulted in several big sales. Last I checked it was still in use.

Sending one big PDF with character analysises of everyone in the company to all of us, from apprentice to founder. He had even brought cake, but the boss threw it out the window and made the guy leave the moment he read that mail 😂

I just had a 2 hours long company lunch followed by a 1 hour meeting with the whole team. And I still have a big problem to discuss with two colleagues. Too much social interaction for one day for me. Damn, how my head hurts.

Big "company summit" this week where everyone flies in and we discuss the future of the company (sadly not over drinks). I might be getting promoted with stock and pay increase, and allowed to hire another dev.

Yet, here I am, updating and sending out my resume, and hoping for something, anything.

A 30% raise wouldn't be enough to deal with all of this madness.

Virtual interview starts and the HR lady:

Oh I was expecting a man!!

(I wasn’t expecting you get surprised!?)

Haven’t you ever worked with female developers in your company or know that it is actually not big news? Some companies have a lot of female engineers including the ones I worked for.

In Central Europe in this age of time?

She was a lovely lady though. I just said

I hope you’re pleasantly surprised 😊

My most f*cked up client process I ever had to deal with:

Digitalizing E-Mails.

I seriously asked if they were joking on me… Wasn't the case.

The process was: Get E-Mail, print out, scan, archive (digitally).

Nobody could explain to me the necessity for this bullsh*t.
"Hmm... Kinda always worked this way, I guess"
The client was a big company. My coworker aged 5x faster during that project. I swear to god, I'm not joking.

I attempted an online test for a Java Developer role at a pretty big company.
The test had a JavaScript question.

🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️

Just to clarify, the job description had no mention of JS

Anyone else thought, while watching the website of a big company, "I could do it better"?

One time was in a meeting with clients from abroad (big company with some offices in the US). After the meeting we went to a restaurant with the clients. Then one hour later our CEO shows up and starts tanking beers like crazy and gets super wasted. Then starts asking the client if they have a job for him in the US. He doesnt want to run his company anymore because all his employees are fuckung idiots blahblah. Then he asks me you understand right you have seen my employees they are fucking stupid. Uhm yeah dude I work for you... *awkward sillence, continues chugging beers, changes topic*

I remember seeing Silicon Valley and watching Big Head do nothing at a big company and thought that was never possible.

Working at a FAANG company for 6 years and just completed 3 months of sitting around doing nothing, with 6 more months to come.

Life is indeed stranger than fiction.

I was about to ask my manager to roll me out off the project in my company.. it has been 4 years .... Yesterday he came and told me he is going to give me an big fat Raise !

You would think for a company as big as Google they would be able to write good fucking documentation but nope!

Fuck me it's more spaghetti than my code!

A company gave a placement talk in college today.

First, they talked about their company's facts and figures, which no one was interested in.

Second, they talked about Amazon and Jeff's vision, AirBnB and their revolutionary idea, more than their own company and products.

Third, they showed some testimonial videos of their employees and customers.

"What the fuck is going on?" I thought. We were there to get information about a placement test.

Buzzwords started coming in. Machine Learning, Artificial Intelligence, Big Data and what not.

Last 15 minutes, a guy came. He talked about test date, test format and test topics, finally.

An hour and half wasted for 15 minutes of information.

Fuck placement talks.

A few years ago, I used to work at a very small company. It was a compact team, we all got along quite nicely and work was very good too, but the salary was very low.

Then I got an offer from a big company in the big city for thrice the pay, and I understood how great an opportunity this is, and I knew I would get a lot to learn from this. So, I decided to take it.

So, when I went to my boss to hand in the resignation, he turned red and started tearing into at me and threatening me. And I was taken aback, because, he was usually so nice. He even threatened to have me kidnapped, and I was so dumbstruck, I couldn't even understand what the heck was going on.

I didn't even finish my notice period. I just went home after that, and never went back.

the worse type of clients are the ones who want a web site ready to deploy with all content present, but can't fucking provide their content
I'm talking about an eshop for a big company in the region who can't fucking provide us the products they intend to showcase and considered the work on their page incomplete because it lacks content

A friend offered me a new job in his company. Therefore I am going to quit my job. I like my current job, but the conditions are shit. Still I like my colleges and my clients. So I feel really bad for quiting.

The Job he offered me is pretty good, well paid and has many benefits for me. I like him and his company and are really excited to work with them. They are expecting big things of me and I'm scared to disappoint them.

Also I haven't told my boss about my plan to quit yet and because we become kind of friends in the time I work for her, it's an difficult talk for me.

😕

So yesterday I posted that no one here in the company listens to music while working, and today suddenly half of the people wear big ass headphones xD

I have the feeling they read my devRant help

Client (big company selling luxury vehicles):
- "We need to replace analytics system on our website"
- "Since it is almost useless"
- "Our company deserve something better, google analytics is not simply enough"
- "Can you program it for us?"
- "We have already arranged budget for that project"
- "Like 200 euros, that must be enough"

Lol

Last year we were given an app to patch that was completely in Arabic (including the documentation). We had a tight deadline to get the app fixed so we paid for a big company to translate the Word document we'd be given.

After 2 weeks we were given the translated documentation only to find it was select recipes from an Egyptian cooking book.

Why does a big company only look at your diploma and a startup only look at your github ?

VScode shows that how good a big company can do to the world by honestly caring about its clients than focusing on its selfish needs.

Phone-interview with a recuiter from a big consultning company.
Her: So, what programming languages are your strongest?
Me: That would be Java, as it's been used through university courses and privatley I've been making some C# projects
Her: Allright cool. What about object oriented languages?
Me:... Erhm.. That would again be Java and C#...

Hello everyone 👋

I see people blaming the developers when you see a crappy software product , saying that they have done a bad job.

But even it could be true also it could be the product managers who didn’t give enough time todo what needs to be done or project scope is too big for the persons knowledge.

I’ve worked in a company where deadlines were so tight I didn’t have enough time to proper UI and Testing. I used to be only developer who has someone experience and I had to train the interns as well. I am also to blame to joining such company but in desperate times takes desperate measures.

And now when i’m leaving the company and I have spend 2 years of my life for apps that I’m not proud of.

Just rant. Please feel free to give ur thoughts

Step 1: start programming from a young age
Step 2: dedicate years to college
Step 3: get a job in a big, respected company
Step 4: do menial tasks that have nothing to do with your educat- wait, what

So I was interviewing at company X, through recruiter A. It all went well - one of the best feedbacks I have ever received actually, but then they went quiet for a bit... only to have the recruiter A call me about 3 days later and tell me that apparently the project they had planned to get me on, was a no go for a while and that they would contact me again within a month or so.

Meanwhile, recruiter B called me up and sent me to company Y and asked me what my situation was at other interviews. I said that I was interviewing at company X and that they came back to me and said the project is delayed and they'll contact me within a month or so.

Recruiter B starts a rant about how he hates when companies do that and that he, as a recruiter, would loose trust in that company if something like that happened.

And now company Y goes quiet for 2 days. Recruiter B calls me and says exactly the same thing.

So naturally, I say - "ah that's a shame, you must be loosing trust in company Y now."

He pauses and says - "Well umm"... another big pause. "I see what you mean, but umm..." another pause and this awkward silence.

"thanks", I said and I hung up. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Just got a job as a junior PHP dev. Company is really chill as long as the work gets done. I can learn a lot here, and I am doing backend stuff mostly.

Got a great PC with 2 big screens and Ubuntu freshly installed by me.

Loving it so far!

In 7 hours I have a meeting with the big Boss CEO our company the head of heads.... I have to present the development plan to save the company (about 9000 employees).... I can't sleep cause I hate to present in general.... I fuc%$# can't get a clear mind.... I'm dieing inside >..< and I really need to sleep
wish me luck

We are rebuilding an internal web app our company uses and this is how the meeting went down

Me: since this is a big undertaking so we should all work on this as a team and divide the work load

Boss: I can't afford the internal costs to have you all on this * assigns the part timer to the task*

Three months later after launch

Boss: this is not at all what I expected! I want the entire team on this now! It's a top priority!

I request the VPN credential to access to an italian big company network.
The ask me the email to send the new credentials.
I reply sviluppo@mycompany.it
They say it's not good, it's not associated only to me.
I said I'm the only developer (sviluppo) in my company.
They reply the is more secure my private gmail account.
They sent the credentials to my gmail account.

I think Microsoft is the only big company that actually cares more about developers than users.

What would you do?

2 job offers...

Job #1 a big sports betting company as a junior software developer with a salary of 22k plus a yearly bonus of 10%

Also uncapped holidays

Or

Job #2
A small IT company with 2 other developers with a salary of 19.5k working on multiple projects and being instantly promoted to mid level developer, also a signing bonus after 3 months of a high end surface laptop.

My week at glance:
Monday: Sunday night hangover
Tuesday:Prepare report for progress meeting.
Wednesday: Progress meeting
Thursday:work little bit for next week progress meeting.
Friday: weekend fever and hence not in mood to work.
#big #company #work #culture

The company who sounded like Dominic Toretto during interview, Is a big red flag.

Employer : "We are family"
Me : 'Really ? Since we are family... Can I have your car please? , Bro I need 5000 MYR'.

If ever anyone from workplace say "we are family " again, I am going to act as if "we are family". I shoud be comfortable to ask for employer's money and drive his car out like a bro.

No? then we are not family.

Hehehehe (n_n)

I had a job that was one big meeting for 6 months. I kid you not. We had our stand up, had another meeting that extended the stand up to discuss issues highlighted in the stand up, then we would have a scrum catch up type meeting then after that work until about 12 so an hour ish? Then a call after lunch to catch up about the work we’d done and make sure everyone was ok, then probably a backlog meeting, then likely a company wide meeting and then at about 4? Probably a meeting. I don’t know by this point I’d lost the will to live. One massive joke of a company I swear

The best decision I ever made was moving from a big company to a very small one.

I used to work for a large international consulting firm in the model development team. Everything moved so slowly, there were huge amounts of pointless meetings and other time-sinks, we were surrounded by people who were being paid a lot of money but added little or no value, and the general atmosphere of the company was quite depressing. We spent more time having to make PowerPoint presentations for senior management trying to explain why you can't just hire 100 devs and have a product 100 times faster than we actually did developing a product.

I took a bit of a risk and moved to become the fourth person (and second developer) at a niche software producer to take over product innovation and lead product development. Immediately I felt so much happier and realised how much the previous company had worn me down. Everyone works hard and efficiently because your individual output is so much more important to the success of the company and the work you put in comes back to you financially without being syphoned by layers of valueless management levels or time-wasters.

Having responsibility, seeing the impact of your own work and being rewarded accordingly is so important for your sense of well-being. I urge you all to try it if you're stuck in a big company that's wearing you down. And if you're considering moving from a small company to a big one: don't.

So, it has been 2 months and a half since I started working. So far I learned two important things.

1. Clients are fucking retards. Like really fucked up shit. I don't even understand how they got the job.

2. Working for a company is nothing like an internship. I now realize much they treated me like shit during my internship compared to my current job. I did my internship in a startup and I now work in a big multinational company, I feel way more welcome in this company than in the startup

So far I really enjoy my work and I've been learning more for the past 2 months than during my studies.

LinkedIn is probably the closest thing we have to a parallel universe,

where all HRs hand out more salary to candidates than they asked for,

where 100% of people struggle in the beginning get their big break and turn their business into a multi-billion dollar company,

where there is no such thing as office politics, every employee is always happy to be a part of the organization.

where each team identifies themselves as a "family".

#ugh

Password policy for a big water company site in Spain.

Translation: Between 6 and 10 characters (only letters and numbers, no spaces)

In guess they have a VARCHAR(10) password field in their db?!?

DEAR CTOs, PLEASE ASK THE DEVELOPER OF THE SOFTWARE WHICH YOU ARE PLANNING TO BUY IN WHAT LANGUAGE AND WHAT VERSION THEY ARE WRITTEN IN.

Background: I worked a LONG time for a software company which developed a BIG crm software suite for a very niche sector. The softwary company was quite successfull and got many customers, even big companies bought our software. The thing is: The software is written in Ruby 1.8.7 and Rails 2. Even some customer servers are running debian squeeze... Yes, this setup is still in production use in 2022. (Rails 7 is the current version). I really don't get it why no one asked for the specific setup, they just bought it. We always told our boss, that we need time to upgrade. But he told every time, no one pays for an tech upgrade... So there it is, many TBs of customer data are in systems which are totally old, not updated and with possibly security issues.

Client from a big company requested that all sensible data should be encrypted, passwords included.
We agreed that was OK, and that we were already saving the hashes for the passwords.
The reply was "Hashes should be encrypted too"

Difference between && and || - 1,7K damages

So last Friday we released a my mistake, which resulted in 1,7 K losses for the company. I feel like total idiot, because I messed up if’s and instead && used ||. Testing did not noticed, pull req was approved, nobody noticed it for four days. But that’s because of complex nature of the function and it’s application, but in the end - it was me who put it there. How do you cope with that? I am leaving next week for a better position in another company and it totally messed things up in my head.

Our company makes 70k in revenue so I doubt it’s gonna put a big dent in finances but I feel completely hopeless and like shit.

2 weeks into the job and already had a fiesta

Apparently production went down.
I work for a huge airline company so that’s a big deal..

However, production was down for the better part of a fuckin day.

The reason? Not a single developer noticed 🤷‍♂️

In the middle of a big project, many demands from the biggest client of yhe company, he left the country and called the boss after 2 days tellinf him he's not coming.
boss is angry,
client is angry,
I am happy.. because client is a piece of shit liar asshole

My company just did its first delivery to a new big customer , got the acceptance docs signed etc.

Was pretty funny to see management and the business-tards furiously emailing one another with company wide replyAll
Congratulating one another over an excellent job they had done in particular,

for example :
Gavin : Ahh capital , well done john for your undertaking in this tremendous accomplishment

John: oh and thank YOU for your guidance Gavin, couldnt have done it without you, we really exceeded outselves with the hard work we put it, also a big mention to (insert another inbred manager's name)

And that keeps on bouncing on and on

( absolutely no fucking mention of devs who did the actual Work, nooo nooo just a brief reference to us as "the boys in london"....)

Kinda glad they aren't in office most of the time else this level of back-patting would have probably turned into a circle jerk in the board room.

Almost thought of getting the dev teams to join the storm of emails and start randomly congratulating one another too with company wide replyAlls but that kind of prank would likely be ill received by out high and mighty leaders.

( on the flip side maybe they would actually learn out names)

Ouch. Friend started at a smallish company (~20 employees), and instead of a new machine he got handed the CEO's 5 year old Dell so the CEO could buy a new machine.

He sees it as no big deal, but am I the only one that sees that as (to put it mildly) a bit of a red flag? It's not the machine itself that's so much of a problem, more the attitude behind the decision that stinks.

A well known, big company in my country just sent me my password in plain text upon registering.
These devs actually got paid to do this...

My current project. Won't reveal anything about it until I've got a usable version (which might take more than a month) but it would be a good way to give a middle finger to a big ass surveillance company.

It won't exactly match with their product since this is impossible for me to do as this would compromise user privacy but it'll come close enough!

Ohhhh fuck!

I think I made a big mistake coming to this company

I've made a social dashboard to pull tweets/instagrams with certain hashtags for a big company event we have next week, which will be on all the big screens. We've been testing it this week on some of the screens. This morning, a Twitter spam bot posted a rather explicit picture of 2 girls having some fun, with one of the hashtags.. It was on the screens for 20 minutes before I realised. 😢

One day after the release of the website of a medium sized travel company, I made a big mistake by accidentally taking it offline for 1 hour during peak usage (~150 simultaneous visitors).
Turns out deleting the wrong image transformation cache folder in production can hang up the PHP process for taking too much load on regenerating image transformations.

The designer of PHP probably took a big load too while creating the first draft.

I briefly worked for a fucked up company that had been bought by a coupon company that had outsourced a project to India

The code contained such gems as

If (Booleanvar ==true)

Among many other little things and some really big ones and was a web project written in vb

I had an interview with a company that works offshore (works for a big silicon valley company) for an internship program. I liked their bosses vision and how he treats his coworkers. After 1 hour technical interview I asked how much they pay for internship and they told me they are not paying anything. And they said hey we are teaching you how things works. Wait... What? Atleast you can pay my transport and food fees. Fuck you and fuck your company. If you don't pay me a single fucking penny, I am not working with you. There is local laws to pay me some money. If you don't care about laws, I wont care about your fucking company. Burn in hell.

No crazy prep, ever.

I always go in with a 'this is me, these are my skills, that's all you're going to get' mindset.

I of course do some research (about the company, their culture, technologies and stuff like that) but I find it kinda weird to spend a big amount of time on interview prep when there is a chance of rejection. (personal opinion)

We as a 15ppl company are contractors for various big agencies, but we're most of the time under NDA. So I guess I'm a "Ghost-Front End Developer".

Just changed jobs and learned that this client, a big international company, spent a whooping 2.000.000,- USD on a WordPress that does not work.
My job: clean up the mess they made.
Annual budget: 200.000,- USD
FML.

When you get a job in big company and all you have to do is to make code changes every fucking day in existing code and you want to quit...

Company top execs: "We need to optimize our costs and reduce our expenditure by x€ to keep the profit margin at acceptable levels for the shareholders"

YOU ARE PUSHING OUT SHIT PRODUCTS DAY IN AND DAY OUT THAT YOU FUCKING SUITS THINK WILL BE THE NEXT BIG THING BUT NOONE REALLY WANTS OR NEEDS. WE ALREADY HAVE A TON OF THOSE BORN-DEAD SHITCAKES HANGING AROUND ABD NEW ONES ARE ALREADY BEING PREPARED FOR LAUNCH.

"OPTIMIZE COSTS"? HOW ABOUT YOU STOP PRODUCING SHIT AND STICK TO YOUR FUCKING CORE BUSINESS MODEL!!!

"OPTIMIZE COSTS"? WE HAVE A ZERG OF OLD FUCKS, WHO ARE STILL WAITING FOR THE FUCKING SMS TO START THE NEXT TECH REVOLUTION, ON OUR PAYROLL. ALL THEY FUCKING DO IS PLAY SUDOKU IN THE KITCHEN AND DISCUSS TECHNIQUES ON HOW TO RAISE GOATS!!!

"NO MONEY TO GIVE A PAYRISE TO DEVELOPERS"? WHY DONT YOU JUST FUCKING GET RID OF THE USELESS DUDES BASICALLY DOING THEIR TENURE AND CLOSE SOME OF THESE FUCKTARDED PRODUCTS THAT 4 PEOPLE OUTSIDE OF THE FUCKING COMPANY USE BUT NEED A TEAM OF FUCKING 20 TO MAINTAIN! NO!!! THEY WILL NOT BE THE NEXT BIG THING! NO!!! ANYTHING YOU SHITCAKES WHO THINK MOBILE APPS IS THE "NEW EMERGING MARKET" WILL EVER CREATE THE NEXT FUCKING BIG THING!!!!!

STICK TO YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS AND STOP CREATING USELESS SHIT THATS MAADE BY FUCKING USELESS PEOPLE!!!!

FUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!

"Our company encourages cryptocurrency big data agile machine learning, empowerment diversity, celebrate wellness and synergy, unpack creative cloud real-time front-end bleeding edge cross-platform modular success-driven development of digital signage, powered by an unparalleled REST API backend, driven by a neural network tail recursion AI on our cloud based big data linux servers which output real time data to our Wordpress template interactive dynamic website TypeScript applet, with deep learning tensor flow capabilities.

Don't get what the fuck I just said? Udemy offers countless courses on python based buzzwords. Be the first out of 13 people to sell your soul and private information, and you'll get the first three minutes of the course free!"

Lately, in the company I work for, it's becoming the norm for the dev to finish workdays at 10pm or 11pm, but we still get yelled at when we arrive after 9am. Anyway, every week, the PMs and salesmen have a big meeting to debrief how everything is working so well in this so wonderful company, and whatever. From what I've been told, it's just a big session of self-satisfaction, applause, and gossips.
During the two or three last meetings, some PMs dared to point out that the dev felt underestimated and constantly under pressure. Last time, the boss of the managers answered: "Developers just like to complain."
Yeah, right! We work like hell everyday to respect deadlines of underestimated projects, we have to fight to get hardware, and even a good chair is a precious resource!
Ultimately, another PM trainee said projects were late because dev are just laughing all day long... Go figure!
I feel like most of IT companies treat dev like inferior robots :(

Big company issues: Try access something "access denied". Spend rest of day trying to figure out who can provide access to that page and what manager that needs to approve it :(

Today I got a email from a person using comic sans as a email signature. And he works at a Big company!!! WHO uses that as a signature?

I finished a big refactoring. It makes me feel so good to delete all those lines of code. Even though I have a decided to leave this company in the near future, I am very happy that I leave the code in a better shape. Somebody who is replacing me doesn't have to go through shit anymore.

In a month: I get married, I give a big project in college, I finish it (Master's thesis), I give a medium-sized project in a company and I play at a concert. I feel like I was mixed up in a big spaghetti pot xd

I interviewed for a big named company who I really admired to work on some video stuff .. My technical interview lasted 10 minutes swiftly followed by a #fail email ... Two years later I had the opportunity to interview again and got a position ! Never stop learning

Worked as a student in a big company. Just doing data entry and checking product data. It was a nice part time job at the same time with computer science study. After a year I asked for something else and switched to the Android Team. I said I could do a little bit of Java and wrote for another half year Unit Tests. That was the point where I really learned coding and got experienced. Would never learned so much in my study because I was lazy. Now I can call me a Android Developer. Still love the company for giving me this opportunity.

Oh boy, finally something to rant about.

I got hired in a "small" company (not even 2000 people in it), then got "shipped" to a way bigger company. Basically, I work for this company (the french biggest internet / phone service provider) but in the name of my own. And this since last wednesday.

First off, I'm fucking stupid. After leaving the big company that I was in before, I swore to myself that from now on, I would work for smaller companies, mainly because I couldn't stand the inertia that big company have. You ask for something, you get it a month and a half after. The old company has about 6000 employees... This company has 98k people in it. Fuck. My. Life.

Now, to the rant: Orange (the company) decided that they had to move their office somewhere else. They set up a lot of things so that all we needed to do was to put things in boxes, to work somewhere else until next monday, then we could go to the new office on tuesday morning.

Keep in mind that I have been there for 8 days: I keep learning how they do their stuff. For example, if I need a specific docker image, I can't get it from the Docker Hub, the download will fail. However, if I hit an Orange subdomain's registry, I will get this image from a mirror. Because fuck logic.

When we join the company, they give us a Windows laptop ("yeaah we have useless but required Orange softwares that don't run on Linux" "Yeeaaah fuck you") that have a specific VPN allowing us to use the Orange network and, in theory, you can download docker images or clone orange repositories from that network.

In practice, you can simply just go fuck yourself. Why? Because whenever you want to curl, wget or pull anything (or even pip install), your connection keeps being shut down while it waits for the response's header.

The worst part? According to my (new) boss's evasive answers, the way to fix that works with glue, sticks and the power of the Force.

WHY THE FUCK DO YOU ENFORCE US A SHITTY OS FOR DEVELOPMENT, WHEN THE TOOLS YOU SHOVE IN IT WITH A FAKE SMILE DON'T EVEN WORK, AND WE HAVE TO HACK OUR WAY TO FUCKING WORK?

A big company owned by a bald cynical guy selling stuff especially during the black Friday offered me a job, all I had to do is 5 interviews.
So I found real job instead.

Worked at a big company as firmware dev a few years ago (less than 2) but switched cause of bad pay. Joined a consulting firm with better pay and bemefits. In 2 weeks I am going back to the old company but as a consultat... they should have just payed me and we could have avoided this :D

I hope and wish that a big company will support/back up VueJS. Maybe then VueJS can be commonly seen as a job requirement.

Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk?

So i had the second talk with this company today. The backend developer somehow expected me to know all four benefits of jQuery. What the hell dude?

Nobody knows everything.

I’m not a big fan of jQuery period.

Currently using Matomo instead of Google Analytics.
Definitely a good alternative!

Especially if you don't want a big company to track YOUR users.

Today is my last day at my current employer(a big german insurance company, boring af) and next monday I start at a medium sized company in an R&D position 😁

NEW TALES FROM THE FUCKING CRYPT. It's disgusting...

... how managers keep to invest money into totally useless gadgets at the company to keep themselves motivated with stupid toys, tech and gear. WHY in fucks name would you not spend the money on hiring more devs and a dev consultant?

It's funny how they presented the stats first: "yea well we have ten big projects in dev right now" (we are FIVE FUCKING PEOPLE, tells you everything, right) "... BUT WE HAVE BOUGHT NEW SCOOTERS FOR THE COMPANY!".

Ok... why though? Who would actually use those things except the ones that bought them. Just another way of spending more money to reduce the promised employee return on the company's profit...

I was being interviewed by a tenured Java Dev for a position of android Dev in a big company. it was a glass walled cubicle, and I could see in the reflection that he was browsing stack overflow and asking me the questions. My answers, although correct, didn't match with the accepted answer in stack overflow. sigh. felt good to be rejected.

So I am helping coworker with debugging a weather forecast feature on a digital display solution we sell to hundreds of companies.

He says he just doesn't know why but the forecast data isn't correct.

I open up file where forecast data is stored and the data hasn't been updated in 6 months.

Thats when he realizes no one has paid the forecast service provider in 6 months...

And this guy is supposed to be senior to me?

I’m in a big company now. We have all the resources in the world. We promote best practice. We don’t even seem to have deadlines. We mob on everything so that we get the benefit of all our experience combined.

So if all that is true, why in gods name does the first class I open have shed loads of hard coded settings, IP addresses and GUIDs in it?

FML. How did I end up working in this shit.

Will happen:
- Leave current shitho...job and join something exciting
- Draw at least 1 manga chapter, im fine if its a one shot or something, i just wanna do it
- Master ocaml
- Move to a big city

Will happen, just not necessarily in 100wks:
- Arduino up my car
- Start a company
- Have at least one open source project that is somewhat successful. Id be more than happy with like 20 stars on github. Currently working on a REST backend generator, that might be big.
- Get a cat.

I hope will happen at least sometime:
- Move to USA
- Finish a Volkswagen collection
- Have a career as an anonymous dubstep artist

*Outsourcing DevOps Company*

> HR got a call from a customer
> Got my contract terminated immediately
> HR and my boss trying to explain to me about the situation
> The customer is one of BIG GIANT conglomerate in my country and high expectations AF
> My boss wants me in the team
> HR denied due to headcount and limited budget from investors
> CEO pay me for the whole 2 months in salary in compensation including unused vacation under the national labour law right away after signing an acknowledge form
> HR told me if I go to the new company, don't forget to tell them about referring

This all happens under 30 minutes after a normal working friday

What a shock

PS. It's a nice DevOps outsourcing company in both working culture and technical TBH

Recently I came across a job advert that literally said:

"If you're still full of ideals and will to work, go look for a job elsewhere!!!"

Man, how fucked up is your company if this is how you promote it? Sad thing is that even though their website looked like shit, they boasted about big government projects there.

> be new in a big-ish company
> be working next to a senior dev, who's been working on The Project for 5 months now (15 yrs in company)
> be asked for halp
> senior dev didn't know how to use git push
GIT PUSH
> be Joe's terminally flaccid dick

When I started at my current Company and was put into my first Project, I discussed the Design Architecture with the lead Programmer in the Project.
Then he dropped the line:
"I don't understand why you were employed as Trainee instead as a Software Developer"

(The Reason was that I wasn't that familiar with Java aside from a little bit what I learned in University)

That gave me a big boost in Confidence ^^

Funny how this company implements policies like a big enterprise when we only maintain three small apps

INTERVIEW. It tells everything about the company. I recently applied for a "big" company for the position of ML Engineer. The Job description was like "someone with good knowledge of visual recognition, deep learning, advanced ML stuff, etc." I thought great, I might be a good fit. A guy called me the next day. Introduced himself as a manager of the Data Science team with 8+ years of experience. Started the talk saying "it is just an informal intro". But things escalated very quickly. Started shooting Data Science questions. He was asking questions in a very bookish way. Tells me to recite formulas (like big formulas). When I explained to him a concept, he was not understanding anything. Wanted a very bookish answer. I quickly realized I know more about ML stuff than him (not a big deal) and he is arrogant as fuck (not accepting my answers). Plus, he has no knowledge about Deep Learning. At the very end, he tells me "man, you need to clear up your fundamentals". WTH??? My fundamentals. Okay, I am not Einstein or Hinton, but I know I was answering things correctly. I have read books and research papers and blogs and all. When I don't know about things, I tell straight away. I don't cook answers. So the "interview" ended. I searched that man on LinkedIn. Got to know he teaches college students Data Science and ML. For a fee of 50,000 INR. It's a big amount!! Considering the things he teaches. You can find the same stuff (with far higher quality) free of cost (on Coursera, Udacity, YouTube, free books, what not). He is a cheater. He is making fool of college students. That is why I sometimes hate "experience". 8+ years of exp and he is such an a**hole!! BTW, I thanked God for saving me from that company. Can't imagine such an arrogant boss.

TLDR: Be vigilant during interviews. It tells a lot about the company.

All is well in 2020 and claiming today will be my year.

1 updated my curriculum vitae and send my resignation love letter
2 hopefully be hired in a stable company and earn enough that can suffice my needs and wants as I moved out from my big sis home. Thank you ^_^
3 move into my long awaited own house for a couple of weeks. Thanks patience and perseverance ^_^
4 self study for freelance projects
5 settle down

Need some advice -

I have over one month spare time before joining the company. I have always wanted to learn an instrument but I'm also 'thinking' of joining a gym but I don't have any fantasies for big biceps and I am a big time foodie.

I have read that learning new instruments would help you in critical and out of the box thinking which is a definite plus while programming. While joining a gym would be a good way to keep myself fit in this hectic world of programming.

I'm torn in choosing between these two options. Which one should I join as a developer? What would my fellow devs suggest? 🤔

Something I have learnt in the past month:

Never settle for a low salary no matter how good a company sounds (unless it's a really prestige company) if they don't realise your worth and don't care about their employees. Salary is important. You are important. And customers are important. Any company that just values money, income, profit and growth over their customer and employee experience is a huge red flag. If your work life is so stressful that it doesn't let you have a good work/life balance then avoid it. What comes above being a developer is being healthy and I think alot of people don't realise this. It may sound good to work as an engineer for a big platform but if they only value themselves you are just a cheap slave, move on and do something respectable and enjoyable.

Just my life lesson in applying for grad jobs.

I am a young junior with a big dick who gratuated top in my class so now Im making 300k a year in this first job in a fortune 5000 company. However Im not happy and I think I want more from life. What I should do? /s

Typical /r/cscareerquestions post

Happy Story,

Today I got a slack message from someone saying that she now reports to me. I had a big grin on my face. I have just been working at this company for 4 months. I hope I do well.

I work as an intern in a big company. There is a person who joined the company recently with about 6 years of experience in other big companies. He can't do simple things like adjusting his computers resolution and raised a request for a new monitor. He used to wonder why his request was denied 😐 later when I got to know this had happened, I went and fixed the resolution, he was so fascinated.. Hmm...

I work in a big German company and we are a lot of teams building the company website.

Obviously the website is in German but almost all the devs are not German speakers, included the testers.

To make the work easier in the frontend we use sometimes the translation function of chrome and it's funny because a lot of time I got a bug opened by a tester for a wrong label because HE FUCKING FORGOT TO DISABLE THE TRANSLATION AND HE THINKS THAT THE LABEL IS IN THE WRONG LANGUAGE

*me working at a huge company as a customer*
Ok, show me what you got.
* Company throws some of the most gruesome and ugly scripts at me*
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD THE WORD INIT SYSTEM? HAVE YOU EVER HEARD THE TERM PRIVILEGE SEPARATION OR BACKUP? DO YOU KNOW THAT A SVN REPO IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE 500GB BIG? AND A JENKINS JOB SHOULD NOT RUN 8HOURS!
Company: you ain't have seen nothing yet.

And they were so right...almost can't bear it anymore

So.. this is a first for me: I have two offers from great companies, one company already sent me a contract to sign and other will send it on Monday.

How do I tell a company that I will take another offer without being an asshole? (This are not big soulless companies that are full of corporate bullshit, so I don't want to be that guy that just leaves after getting a decent offer)

Just got an internship in a big company. Related to web development but they want me to use/maintain legacy jsp, servlet code. Should I take it? There are other departments too but I have been put in this shitty one.

Can't get over how many big companies get away with poor/no documentation for their own APIs. The past week i have been working with a large insurance company that only via email threads explained what endpoint to send files to and what username I could use to get this to work.

I also worked with a major courier service last month that only had a two page document for all their methods and one of the pages was explaining the transportation of data via imagery haha.

I needed an internship. I was a week from the deadline so... I asked my sister to get me an internship in the big company she works in. I'm ashamed

I built a fairly simple database and website to showcase school curriculum “reader” books searchable and sortable by levels of difficulty and other metadata. I didn’t think much of it when I was building it but apparently it won the company a few million bucks in revenues once it launched. The big wigs rewarded that by selecting me as one of a few folks that got to go to a big corporate retreat in the Bahamas. This was before the company management went to crap and stopped incentivizing innovations at the employee level.

Does anyone hear in their company about risk assessment towards American tech companies and their services?

It came to my ear that many European big companies are asking analysis\risk-assessment companies about the reliance on American services and commodities because of how the big American corporations reacted at the Huawei ban.
It's like if America did this to such big Chinese company, they have proven that they cannot be reliable in the long term because of political turmoil.

TV Show 'Loaded' premieres tonight. Four friends sell their app to a big company. Comedy tonight at 10 p.m. Eastern time. Probably not in the league of Silicon but might be worth a look.

Checked mails and saw bunch of newsletters from the same company.
Me: huh? I don't remember subscribing to these. *scrolled down* here it is, (button to unsubscribe from these emails)
*Clicked and got redirected to their feedback page before unsubscribing.
Me: Cool, just need to provide feedback, not a big deal. *gave feedback*
Message reads : DONE. Operation failed. Due to technical error

What!! I'm gonna block the shit out of you!!

Which is worse?

- Staying at a company you helped build because you have an emotional attachment to it, even if it's not as good to work for now, people are leaving every week and pay is under market rate.

- Leaving a company you helped build purely for more money and a big name on your CV.

Follow the money or follow your heart?

(Image slightly relevant?)

I got a call from a recruiter yesterday. The employer wants to get me in for an interview. It's for a fairly big company and I'm beginning to feel really nervous. I hate the place I'm at and I need this job. Not just for money but also to retain my sanity.

The interview is with a development manager, I wonder what kind of questions he/she will ask. Ahhhh how do I prepare for the unknown? 😱

I can’t understand why every time I work for a multimillionaire company that sells their product to thousands of companies, when I start to debug this fucking product it crashes because of the absence of simple input checks... wtf

“Can’t divide by zero”
“Null everywhere”

Worst experience with managers.

Joined new company.

My work experience, knowledge and everything else was upto the mark(exceeded at some places) with their requirements. I was handling full technology stack for previous company.

But while negotiating he declined me salary I asked for because previous company was small (startup with no big name, it shut down after few years) also previous company payscale was low so they offered me increment based on that payscale( which was low compared to salary they offer for same experienced person).

He also hired one more guy who was from big company with same experience, but he got more salary than me. Later I came to know that he knows little compared to me and most of the time manager asked him to take help from me for coding.

Now at the time of increment he is offering me increment with which my salary is still less that the other guy.

I think its time to leave.

Just started working as a student for a big tech company in Belgium. They only allow me to use dotnet core and the only thing I've never ever used is dotnet... Fml.
(any suggestions/tips are welcome)

How it feels being an independent developer working for a big company

- always challenging, so fun
- real-life impact on masses
- programming is usually the core of "the next big thing" [™ Joe MacMillan]
- plays an important role in the world's growth nowadays
- every company needs them, so you'll always have a job
- well paid

Big company asking me about query optimization during a DEV position interview... Do you really have no one better than me to optimize your queries?

I'm really afraid of your codebase now... Might decline if I pass...

Marketing tech of over 25 years in this company asks this at least 2 - 3 times a year, "to find the percentage, take the small number and divide by the big number right?"

NO. NO. NO. NOOO! NOOOOOO! God dammit. You're a grown man.

Ever since i joined my company, things are getting worse.

from small details like them abandoning team lunches to big ones like the fact no one or at least i didnt get any bonus this year.

I know for a fact bonuses were a thing before i joined and i was really looking forward to it...

And now by the end of the month we will recieve word about whether we are getting acquired or not...

After reading this rant one would think the company is getting bankrupt, and this worries me because this job was best i could ever ask for, i dont wanna abandon ship :/

Anyone here making big bucks working for a small company? I've interned at startups and worked full time for fortune 500's, but I'm considering looking at smaller companies in the future just because the corporate environment kind of burns me out. What's it like being a senior level developer for a smaller company? Is the money typically there? And in your experience, what about quality and expectation of work? I would love to have some more say and passion into what I'm building and take home a big chunk of what a business earns but I don't know how realistic that is.

I'd also like to start my own e-commerce company but as a web developer with 0 business / marketing experience that seems far off lol

I applied for a dev job, ofc _without_ looking at their references before sending my candidature.
Turns out 80% of their references are porn sites...
Most of them are quite big as far as I can tell, but I don't really wanna work for a company like them. I'm still young, I don't really think it would make a good impression later on if I'd had a company who makes 80% porn sites in their portfolio in my CV when posting for more serious stuff.

And they asked me for a phone interview. Should I accept it?

People hear talking about shit like "*high level stuff* SUCKS. YOU *big tech company* FUCKTARD." And I'm just here trying to graduate without failing a CS course because my teachers want me to mug up the code and not understand it! Needless to say, I don't mug up but it's just so fucking irritating when people in your class are mugging up the code and definitions like it's Redbull and scoring stellar grades. FUCK THIS SHIT!

Waiting for my interview at a big firm.
Nervous.
If I am accepted here, I will have to break a 1 year contract with my previous company. I just feel it is not the right thing to do but this is a very good oppurtunity for me.

Fun happy story I thought I'd share with you guys:

I applied to a big tech company for a SWE internship. I was talking with one of my classmate that was usually landing big internship

Friend: good look with your interview, I know people that got it and their salary is x $/h
Me: *getting hype for that huge salary and preparing for the interview*

A few week later, after I was told that they did not have a place for me:

[...]
Friend: What ? No it wasn't x$/h I told you they pay, it's (x-10) $/h...

I guess I misunderstood him the first time.. anyways x $ was really a high salary for an intern position

But then, I got a call from the company, saying that they found a place for me at another location but they will pay for relocation and the salary is actually (x+5) $/h

Me telling my friend,
Friend: wth this is impossible
*le friend proceed to send his resume to this company*

😂
PS: for other students out there: don't be afraid to send resumes to big company, they are most likely looking for passionate people like you !

Little bit of background I've been a front end developer for the past eight years not a good one but I get by. Last 4 working with consulting firms for fortune 500 clients. Big projects big plans big structure, following someone else's lead and just knowing the basics of code reviewing, git flow, code deployment and everything else... life happens and i end up as a front end developer for a big company not tech related that wants to depend less from consultants and do more in house dev. Seems a pretty straightforward project front in angular. Back on python doing queries to a database with sql server. I finish the on-boarding and after two weeks finally get access to the repos. Worst spaghetti code I've ever seen. Seems like someone took a vanilla script project from 10 years ago and push it into an angular tutorial project. Commented code, no comments for the code, deprecated functions still there, no use of typescript nested ifs hell. I try to do my job doing new features do comments clean up a bit. Senior developers get annoyed

Found this in some knowledge base article of a big software company.

I'm gonna use this as my automatic email response for work.

Big company vs small company pros and cons?

There's this company that works in the RPA (Robotic Process Automation) domain, they describe their work as using A.I and Machine Learning to collect Big Data whilst following the latest trends in IoT, Blockchain, Web 6.9, and any other fancy term they can use while in fact, well... They're using an outdated software that uses vb6 modules to scrap some images and no employee have ever written a single line of code.

Big Big kudos to all my friends who develop and mantain Safari! :D Your work is surely appreciated. How could i live without that ...pitiful, terrible, broken, Disgraceful, full of incompatibilities, slow, version swarmed piece of utter and definitive Garbage? :D

I really really hope that one day every company on earth will stop supporting or requiring your torture device and we'll have an internet free of your nonsense :D

Big military company is using their custom font for everything. Is there a way to find documents that use a specific font?

All hail to the corporate identity!

Microsoft buys npm
Am I the only one seeing a tendency of a few big companies (Microsoft, Apple, Google, Yandex, Tencent and 10-15 more) slowly (or not so slowly) acquiring more and more small companies? I hope however that it stays as transparent to the end user; I also hope it even helps, because I hate getting used to a product/service and then the company dropping it because they have no resource and/or interest in supporting it (Google Inbox anyone?)

We were contracted into this big corporate company about 12km down the highway from us in the most congested part of the city.

We had a 1 hour meeting scheduled for the Wednesday that we had to drive in for, on the day before that we had to drive in for a 1 hour planning meeting for the next days meeting.

We had a 1 hour meeting to plan a 1 hour meeting...

I am learning to hate working for a large company!

Tuition reimbursement I earned is getting denied because of the freaking beuracracy!

The ONE perk I actually had left at my job and they took that away too!

FML

I'm just attending an online conference of a big, global company. They are redesigning their internal websites and going through all the improvements. Just then a question pops up in chat:

"Will we be able to insert moving gif files into the new sites?"

Sheeeeeesh, 1990 feelings...

Hello world,
at my current job at a "big company" our development process sucks, something is on fire at all times, there are hundreds of dependency issues, it's so bad that I'm struggling to find motivation.

Yet they pay me well.. Yaay for big companies that refuse to change when provided with feedback on how to improve things.

In the last module of my bootcamp(make all the jokes you want about bootcamp I have thick skin and a degree 😬) and just started applying for jobs. First job I applied for was a big company asking for 5+ years experience.

Might as well get used to rejection early 😂

How f*cked does a code base have to be until you jump ship? I got a new job recently and been working there for about 4 months. It's a big company and there's ways to move around internally.. but holy cow the code is bad. It almost seems beyond the point of no return... Almost like a totaled car.

I'm Programmer/Analyst in one of the hgh ranking BPO company here at Philippines.

I'm currently on a project, I'm on a team who's managing machines parts. The project is CATERPILLAR.

The biggest challenge here is if there is a outage on the system, the number of Severity 1 issues keeps coming like there's no tomorrow. And there's only 5 of us on Tier 2 which is managing this abends, errors, bugs in the system.

Is there a way on preventing this outage/connection error. Like HELLO IT IS A BIG COMPANY !!! HOW THE HELL THEY CAN'T EVEN MANAGE THEIR CONNECTION!!!!

Second job

Was the lead dev on an ios/android project. I knew that i was not gonna spend much time there and was using them to add shit to the portfolio. my app is in the playstore and seems to be working fine, can't get credit for it and can't bitch about it either since i burned all bridges with that company. the app is a trucking logger logistics ba type of deal for a local company.

i was paid $400 dllrs a week. Yeah I know, ain't shit in the U.S much less Texas. But the thing gave me perspective:
Android development sucks big balls and ios is way easier and nicer on devs.

Kinda amazing that dyn does not have DDoS protection...
It is NOT hard to get and for a quite big Company like dyn - it is cheap also

Excel rant.
I know excel is not a programming language, but it is what I deal with everyday.

My immediate boss is Japanese(Japanese company).

Our boss will occasionally add to the shared spreadsheet without telling us. We find out the next day by discovering that other sheets that reference to it are waaaay off. Or the big one is the mass amount of #ref all over the sheet.

I mean come on man, at least look around the large sheet first!

This is the one of the best day of my last 2 years struggle.
I got my devRant stickers and
BIG NEWS I got interview call from a company that I really wanted to work for.

Wish me luck !
Fingers crossed !

So I got my first Dev job as a Junior!!!! It is in a big company that seems to be full of energy and ideas.
I am really excited and hope this all go well.
I'm just lost about how to be prepared for the first day and afraid to not meet the expectations I think they have on me.

Spent years ranting about being a contractor and freelancing. Finally got a job at a big company. Now I'm hating it and missing my old flexible work life. Hello dev rant, I'm back!

I'm gonna spin this as ridiculously awesome meeting. My company is currently expanding the local satellite office in to a full site. Part of that includes building a local presence for recruiting efforts.

I was part of a meeting I organized at my alma mater between my executive partner and two deans of the college. I am leading the effort to help them align their curriculum with modern practices, training them on free software licences with my company, and more. As well, there's an opportunity to train students on an untouched area of big data in the medical industry.

Less than 2 years with the company and partners (local, national, and international) in the company within my work area are sending me kudos.

I work for an big company that owns a social media website. One day I worked on the CSS of that side an changed...
[read more]

>first time working for big tech company
>first couple days with no sudo, cant setup environment :(
>however
>first couple days mostly debating new peers on if water is wet
>verynice.jpg

My company is supposed to be 'remote friendly'

Any request to work from home is a fight to get approved, regular days frequently get cancelled for vital meetings and best of all our infrastructure is so shit the VPN drops silently every 5-10 mins. Good luck doing a big merge or getting latest code.

Having my last day at this company today!!! So looking forward to the new job. No more customers I have to talk to, no more deadlines, no more fucking app development.

Going to be the lead SEO and e-Commerce guy in a relatively big company, with my own small team, finally my own office again - and less development (but will still develop about 20% of the time).

Gonna be awesome, but first, I get to have 3 weeks vacation to renovate my house 😁

I don’t think anyone was nearly as happy as I was to find out Twitch’s source code got leaked and that they use GO.

Makes me glad to see Go used by another big company for a big application like twitch where performance is really important.

Visited my previous company today and found out that they are doing a big release today. Hm, its Friday, holidays, they won't work next week.. Well.. gg gj hf

is there a opensource tool to collect all the existing databases in a big company to one platform/cockpit? In order to make them queryble via graphQL? aka. [Company.api]

Recently I see people installing Linux distros to their Macbooks. Is MacOS that bad? I mean I use Ubuntu in my daily life but let's accept that most of the Linux distros (for desktop of course) has hickups. I haven't used MacOS but there is a big company maintaining and optimizing it for just few machines. What is the point installing a Linux distro to a Mac?

I'm not sure if it is a dev experience, but definitely boosted my morale.

In 2014, my company (in India) sent me to attend a conference in Boston. The conference was about big data.

When I came back, I wrote a blog post about Apache Spark in my company's blog. Because of the blog, my name got mentioned in a prominent newspaper's article about Apache Spark.

PS: That is my only blog post till date

Now I also experienced the corporate IT - hell.
I'm an apprentice at a small but branch of a fairly big company.
We get a fuckton of guidelines from our IT-HQ, plenty of them outdated.
We can't even decide how to configure our firewalls our self, but get them preconfigured from the HQ.
They micromanage us so hard, we can't even put a switch in a room, without having to arrange that shit with them.

Great how I’ve just started a new job, haven’t been given all the licenses I need to run the software, there are multiple products with little to no documentation (and by none I mean the word “Architecture” is all there is in one of the main products ReadMe file) and I’ve a year of this! How is a company that’s this big not in any way documented like! This is gonna be long 😑

Do you think my credit card company has a big bounty? String formatting really isn't that difficult.

How long did it take to receive an offer from a big tech company after your final interview? I’m just so antsy with waiting.. Any one have experiences past 2 weeks? Or even next day?

I started working as back end dev and I was given a pc sadly with no admin rights (which I neede oc) so I happily requested them to IT services. After 3 weeks of waiting got a msg telling me that the script for giving me admin rights was not working so they had to send the request to the next lvl and bla bla bla.
So... I called them. A really nice guy just connected to my pc, used an admin resque account and added my user as admin (2 mins) et voilà. 1 month of waiting for a 2 mins shet. Hate big companies...

Company tracking software on your computers? My company is starting to talk about it due to everyone being remote. I don't want to be that guy talking about 1984 and big brother but it really sits with me wrong. Philosophically at least. Most of us are against it and have proposed a united front of refusal. Thoughts?

How can a big company as Facebook, allow that many functions of its website are just untested?

I make you an example, access the mobile version of Facebook from browser, go to a group and change the notifies settings, then refresh the page. The settings returns as before! If I did something like this I'd get fired in less than 0.1 seconds

!dev
fuck call of duty and activision. I finally had time to play with my friends when suddenly I had to download a 56 GB update. Why the fuck does every update have to be big? Then after that monstrous update, if you want to play multiplayer, you still need an additional 22 GB for a multiplayer pack which you already have. This has to be the most clueless company out there. I should have uninstalled this game a long time ago.

Today is my first day as back-end developer in a big e-commerce company (MercadoLibre). I'm really excited.

Loving inaccurate documentation...
And it's from a big company as well!

Reset value: 0x0000007F

I didn't get it to work for several hours.
And then I checked...
The actual value it gets reset to is 0.

Just 0.

My company just released its website today. Previously, it just used its parent company's site.

Now, the problem is that it sucks big time. Awful design, pixelated stock photos, bad navigation, and broken grammar.

In the company's defence, it's not a web shop. It employs zero web devs. The site was built by an external company.

But if you are like me, you visit company websites before you apply for a job, and in this case, it would bed a big red flag.

Or maybe the hard-core embedded devs they are looking to employ wouldn't notice? Maybe they are all stuck in the year 2000 as well? I used to be a web developer so maybe my criteria are broken?

Startup company thats self sufficient and fair wage and freedom

Or

Bigger company with 50% bigger wage but with big company things attached?

Started working in big firm from past 2 months, I was learning about company, its products and what it does. To speed up things I asked one senior who has 8 yrs of exp, she said she also has no clue how things work here......
Now I know why I was hired as an urgent requirement......

My Teamleader is such a dick, he has mental and isn't able to act as a normal human being. The year started with his disappointment that we didn't worked for the company during the holidays! Sorry, but my family has higher priority than the company, especially during the jolly days, you lonely nerd without any interest beside sitting in front of your computer all day long.
He managed to get me thinking about moving to another company. I need the harmony in the team and won't fight every single fucking day. I noticed that I get very nervous when he enters the room. Everyone in the team is hating to discuss things with him because he knows it better.
The problem is that we're a small team with big responsibilities for each developer. Loosing one team member is quite hard to compensate.
Should I still try move? I guess the harmony with all your teammates is evenly important as it's in a good relationship, right?

!rant

Interview on Monday. Buzzing! The company is pretty cool, they have a startup buzz but part of a wider umbrella of businesses so don't suffer from the financial uncertainty that destroyed my last company (that and my old boss was pretty clueless about everything except sales). They also give time for personal projects, allow remote working, bonuses if the company does well and provide its employees transparency to its finances.

In short, I'm not going to be a cog in a big corporate wheel. If I get this.

Well they liked the code I produced for their programming test, so good start.

Meta: categorised this as rant because it's tech related, but obviously it's not a rant, what's the protocol? Random?

We are around 12 people working in a big project as externals consultants for another company ... For the last month all you can see people doing in the office is taking online courses, looking for other jobs, and similar.

Man do I need to grab some piece of wooden furniture for when we got the iceberg!

I was interviewed for a job at a very big company and everythin went fairly well untill they brought 3 sheets of paper with .net specific theory and gave me 30 minutes to answer them... What the actual fk

What to choose for first job?

1. Small company "10-15 people" working with CRM systems C# Full stack.

2. Big company "1000+ people" working with java backend.

Same pay and language doesn't really matter right now. What's best for the future?

Here's another company hiccup: Get an email from a big online payment company that my account has been suspended due to dubious credit card activity.
Plot twist: I haven't got a credit card!

Ever work for a really big company and at the end of the year read the statement on how much profit they made?

Looking back at last years, while looking at the new codebase i'm working on and asking

"How does this shit, equal that much money"

Ok I got a new position with a client which is a big pharma company (like evil corp). What script do I need to write now to make drugs free?

There is some kind of business big change in the company where I'm currently working.
I'm really happy with the current situation, in terms of salary, flexibility, teammates... all. I don't really want this to change.

In 15 min I have a metting with the bosses to talk about those changes. I feel pretty nervous about what they will say and what can I say to keep my interests.

Wish me luck.

When I'm at a medium sized company: Let's get CI/CD so we can build things and release things fast and stress free.

Now working at a big company. We have all the CI/CD we can ask for. Why are things still so slow and stressful o.o

My Team leader is such a bastard who doesn't do any work and every day he has parcel from some online shop like Amazon or something getting graphics card.raspberry pie etc etc and he literally does nothing. These are a guys who cost company and contribute to downfall of the company. If I would have been a CEO I would have fired such guys. But you know the shortcomings of the big company. And his face like a rotten tomato. No expression and most sadist face. You will ever find

How was your experience working for a software development agency? How big was the company (number of employees and projects)?