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Search - "brilliant"
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"Sir, I fixed the recent bug"
"Great, what did you do?"
"I commented out the code that was causing it :)"
"Brilliant! You didn't forget to push the code to production, did you?"
"No Sir, I pushed it immediately"
"Marvelous! I'll arrange a promotion for you next month"5 -
When I was a kid, I used Dreamweaver and my mother would watch me doing things and she used to say "Oh, my dear there are lots of icons and buttons!!! How do you manage that? How do you know which one is for what purpose? You are really brilliant."
And now I use Atom IDE and she says "This looks very easy. Technology has evolved so much that you don't have to click so many buttons and just write simple lines, just as simple as writing letters and the software does the rest of the things. These softwares have done a brilliant job."
Seriously the technology has changed (and my mother too) !!!11 -
When I was in the army I wasn't officially a dev. But one commander needed someone to develop a bunch of stuff and couldn't get a dev officially, so I ended up as his "assistant", which was an awesome job with about 60% time spent on software development.
Except I wasn't an official developer, so I wasn't afforded many of the privileges developers get, like a slightly more powerful machine, a copy of Visual Studio, or an internet connection. In this environment you couldn't even download files and transfer the to your computer without a long process, and I couldn't get development tools past that process anyway.
So I was stuck with whatever dev tools I had pre-installed with Windows. Thankfully, I had the brand new Windows XP, so I had the .Net framework installed, which comes with the command line compiler csc. I got to work with notepad and csc; my first order of business: write an editor that could open multiple files, and press F5 to compile and run my project.
Being a noob at the time, with almost no actual experience, and nobody supervising my work, I had a few brilliant ideas. For example, I one day realized I could map properties of an object to a field in a database table, and thus wrote a rudimentary OR/M. My database, I didn't mention, was Access, because that didn't need installation. I connected to it properly via ADO.NET, at least.
The most surprising thing though, in retrospect, is the stuff I wrote actually worked.14 -
Installs 45gb game
Next day do an update - not enough storage
Sees 28gb free on disk
Googles
Turns out steam copies your entire game during an update so it can roll back of there's an error
Fucking brilliant.19 -
Hope it's not a repost but this is brilliant... although putting it up in my office wouldnt change anything. Password123 was there before me and it'll be there after me.8
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Drug dealer : yo, you code right?
Me: yeah, why
Drug dealer: can you hack into the police station.. You know, see if they are checking me out.. If they know I'm dealing.. I'll just move
(I've never hacked but I know i could learn if I have to)
Me:... That's actually brilliant
I love in a small town at the moment.. I bet the police security is a joke
Kinda high risk though20 -
Rubber duck company meeting in 1998:
Okay folks, our sales are plummeting, we need new ideas... NOW!
Employee: Let's brainwash developers! Make them think our ducks magically solve their debugging issues....
Other employees: *rofl*
CEO: Brilliant, let's do that.3 -
This is just my token of appreciation for the Skype devs. Can't begin to say how much I hate it. Your android app is a joke even after a host of updates, your desktop client is an even bigger joke (atleast Linux Beta version, I know betas aren't supposed to be stable but this is ridiculous).
You have reinvented chat clients to be extremely bulky, cumbersome and very hard to sync across devices. And you have managed to make it "buffer" more than a YouTube video does on a 2G network. I for one, am blown over by how you did that. And to top it all, you can't close the client on Linux atleast! All you did is just override the close button so that it only minimises it. Brilliant piece of work right there!
Why the hell can't you just close the client and run it in the background the proper way like everyone else does? Why does it have to take 20 *** seconds to open a message? The only reason I am stuck with this is some wierdos in the office still only use this. Get your shit together 😡
Ahh.. I feel much better now.18 -
1. You will write ugly code. Code that is in dire need of refactoring almost immediately.
2. You will write brilliant code. Functions and algorithms that will impress all that use them.
3. 1 & 2 are not mutually exclusive. Good software can be written poorly, beautifully written code can be useless. At the end of the day, just get the job done.2 -
Work.overtimePay = (hours, normalRate) => {
// return hours * (rate * 2)
return "you guys are brilliant!"
}10 -
While everyone else is working, I took vacation for the whole December. Turns out, that was a brilliant move!
I stroll 20+km every day in this beautiful, puffy scenery.71 -
I have a client (a friend of a friend of a friend) who came to me to build them a "simple" booking solution for their home cleaning business. Easy enough, I first thought.
Having taken a deposit based on my initial quote and contracts all signed, roll on exactly 8 months to where I find myself today.
It turns out, there is no cleaning business as the business will be totally reliant on the website. The original goalposts have now been moved to a completely different fucking country. The (now) required functionality has STILL yet to be finalised (I told client I'm not writing another line of code until EVERYTHING has been mapped out and made crystal clear), as every single face-to-face meeting / back and forth email turns into the client requesting hundreds more brilliant, essential features that make absolutely ZERO fucking sense. And now, to top it all off and push me into writing my first ever rant on here, I've just received an email from the client this morning saying "what I would like to have is like an online restaurant live booking system". WTF?!?!?
I work from home and have only my dog for company today, so please don't judge me. Just needed to let it all out.11 -
This company!
Ugh.
Two days ago we had an hour and a half meeting on which projects to focus on, with the result being all seven are top priority. Because of course.
Last night I told my boss why an api he has me hitting always returns 401s; even gave him the line# responsible for the response (in his code). After an hour and sixteen minutes of him debugging, he finally admitted I might be right. zzz. This morning, he tells me it's on my end, and to ask someone else for their project's API code. The problem is that the server is not accepting the new application's key, since that key is not in the allowed list. That other project works just fine. Guess why? Their key has been whitelisted for months. But it's totally my code. Yeah. Bloody brilliant. 🔅
Anyway, today we're discussing "Winning with Accountability," a 100 page book that boils down to "do what you say you'll do, by when you said you'd do it, and take responsibility if you don't." But a huge part that the boss is stressing is: provide the exact date, time, and timezone of when things will be completed by. I mean That's fine for sales calls and reports and such trivial busywork. But dev projects? Not so much.
And that's been my past three days!
Friggin joy.6 -
After work I wanted to come home and work on a project. I have a few ideas for a few things I want to do, so I started a Trello board with the ideas to start mapping things out. But there were guys redoing the kitchen tile and it was noisy as fuck. So I packed up and headed to the library.
So I get all set up, and start plugging away. Currently working on a database design for a project that is a form for some user data collection for my dad, for an internal company thing. I am not contracted for this - I just know the details so I am using it as a learning exercise. Anyway...
I'm fucking about in a VM in MySQL and I feel someone behind me. So I turn and it's this girl looking over my shoulder. She asks what I am doing, and it turned into a 2 hour conversation. She is only a few years older than me (21) but she was brilliant. She (unintentionally) made me feel SO stupid with her scope of knowledge and giant brain. I learned quite a bit from talking to her and she offered to help me further, if I liked.
And she was really cute. We exchanged phone numbers...16 -
Most humbling experience? Probably coming to the job that I currently have right now. The people I work with are fucking brilliant. I talk to this girl that is like 6 years younger than me and I feel DUMB. But I also realized that I have knowledge she doesn't. It really helped me to realize that education and experience are great, but everyone can teach you something.5
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!rant but True story!
OMG, my coworker (rather elderly if it matters), asked if he needs to open webapp in internet exploder.. < - It was intentional, but this happened in convo over morning coffe and me and some other guy almost choked with laugher & coffee..
Fucking brilliant! IE = Internet EXPLODEr! Love it!
Man, I love my coworkers (some)!!!!6 -
When I was in college, I had some serious knob-heads in my class. They kept on asking where they could download free movies.
So I made a .bat file called "free movies". It had a nice icon and everything. And placed it on their desktops.
What did it do?
Kept spawning message boxes that read "do some math bitch" and opening new instances of the calculator.
It was too brilliant to see people watch their computers crash, and might I add, crash slowly, because these computers had tons of ram.
Never click on "free movies" kids.4 -
Working on code that we took from other devices company. We found this brilliant thing in one of their function (check catch blok)1
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PM: Guys, we have to upgrade Java 8
Me: hey check out all these cool functional programming stuff (lambdas)in Java 8.
PM: Sorry you can't do that. Our automated testing software isn't up to date to test Java 8. So you have to code it "vanilla"
Me: Erm, upgrade it?
PM: we didn't budget it for that.
Me: *thinks to me miself* brilliant8 -
Once a while when I got brilliant idea of application in my head.
- open IDE
- write hello world
- close IDE
Month later wondering wtf was this about.2 -
Sometimes when I need a break from coding and life... I gather a bunch of wood and have a bonfire In my backyard late into the night and listen to Alan watts for hours... This guy is the most brilliant philosopher ever... There's something about a fire + a bottle of wine deep + Alan watts that simply puts me in the most peaceful state of mind I've ever had...
https://youtu.be/giZN0ZuDERY17 -
So simple, but so brilliant!
I love the new code editor in Visual Studio 2017. 😁
(when you hover on a dotted line you see a preview of the part of code where it starts)6 -
who ever has this as their skill set are legends!!
made me laugh going through thousands of lines of skills :D
"
A little bit of Lua in my life
A little bit of JS is all i need
A little bit of bash is what i see
A little bit of JSON in the sun
A little bit of Python all night long
A little bit of TCL here i am
A little bit of this makes me your dev
"1 -
Bank forces me to change my password. Figured I'd use Safari's strong password generation. Submit. Password changed.
Go to log in with new password. Password not saved because I had previously told Safari not to save this site's password.
Okay… so the strong password you JUST generated and submitted without showing me is now my banking password but neither of us knows what it is?
Fucking brilliant. I mean at least let me fucking copy it so I can store it in my password manager. The most hilarious thing is the message that appeared on the generated password saying my password would be available from Safari preferences. Yup, nope. Nothing there except a note saying no passwords will be stored for this site.
This is the state of Apple in 2018, folks. Fucking sad.16 -
I've found sites like Udemy/Khanacademy/Codecademy/Brilliant/Edx to be very useful — possibly more useful than expensive education.
But they still need:
1. Better correction/update mechanisms. Human teachers make mistakes and material gets outdated, and while online teachers are rectified faster than classroom teachers, the procedure is still not optimal. Knowledge should be a bit more like a verified wiki.
2. Some have great interactive coding environments, some have great videos, some have awesome texts, some have helpful communities. None has it all. In the end, I don't want to learn a new language by writing code in my browser. It could all be integrated/synced to the point where IDEs have plugins which are synced to online videos, with tests and exercises built in, up to a social network where you could send snippets for review and add reviews to other people's code.
3. Accreditation. Some platforms offer this against payment, but I think those platforms often feel very old school (pun intended), with fixed schedules, marks and enrollments. Self paced is a must.
4. Depth is important. Current online courses are often a bit introductory. We need more advanced courses about algorithms, theoretical computer science, code design, relational algebra, category theory, etc. I get that it's about supply/demand, but we will eventually need to have those topics covered.
I do believe that for CS, full online education will eventually win from the classroom — it's still in its infancy, but has more potential to grow into correct, modern education.10 -
A very experienced PM/WebDev came to us. His resume was fantastic but a bit strange. He wrote he had been working for 15 years but his experience in C# was 18 years. Though I was sceptical about this guy, others expected him to be a .NET guru. So, the interview began. The candidate described his brilliant career, then he said he wanted to move forward as a programmer and work with the newest technologies. It wasn't easy to ask him basic questions but they were in the list, so we needed to start with questions for juniors. I asked him to tell us about value types and reference types, and the answer was: about what? I repeated the question, and he said he didn't know about such complex things. I knew his resume was strange but I was disappointed. It turned out that our candidate didn't know C# at all.6
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So I spent 4-5 weeks explaining how shit the current code base was, implemented gulp tasks to lint js, CSS etc, written shed loads of coding standards and best practices to follow. At this point everyone was onboard with the changes and thought brilliant were going to start getting some good code coming out of this team.
I go on holiday for a week, come back and fucker has ignored the documentation disabled the linters in the gulp tasks and the code is back to square one SHIT!!
Plus everyone still committing to master!!!!
Why do I bother!!6 -
Like "Why is Facebook webpage running so slow" (I think cuz of all the tracking stuff, and they are having trouble on my Linux machine). But I gave it a naive duck-duck and found this brilliant tip to "Reinstall JavaScript" to improve that performance. I'm just so speechless rn... And the cherry on the ice-cream is the link :Drant reinstall js wtf-anyway? like what? guys... facebook is evil i dont want to use it i use arch btw java is also an island9
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Not an office prank, but when I was in high school we had some public computers and I switched some shortcuts for chrome and internet explorer, so when you clicked chrome, something that should not be called a browser would open.
And than I got the brilliant idea: I wrote a script camuflagged as a chrome icon that would launch 100 internet explorers. Legend says that people are still raging to this day.6 -
Christmas lights were blinking randomly IN SECTIONS without any sort of "control brick", just with a plain wall plug and TWO wires coming out of it.
In this house we obey the laws of physics, I immediately called magic on this and started digging. I found out that was like five chains of lights wired in parallel, and every chain contained one special lamp that had a thin plate of some thermal-sensitive material inside. It heats up which makes it go straight, thus breaking its chain until it cools down enough to curl again and make the contacts touch.
Brilliant and really cheap way of making randomly blinking Christmas lights without any kind of controller, with just two wires and some physics. That's what I call "nocode".10 -
A brilliant article that talks on the state of internet
The Bullshit Web - https://pxlnv.com/blog/...
Tldr: as internet speed increased, page loading time did not decrease because the extra bandwidth is being stuffed with unnecessary big scripts and autoplaying videos.
AMP is nothing more than a business tactic by Google24 -
Am I only one thinking that Linux is kind ok cliche among programmers. Some of them brag about using Ubuntu over Windows like it makes you a better programmer. I have seen brilliant Windows developers and shitty Linux developers. My point is not that Windows is better, just stop bragging that you are using Ubuntu, it does not make you smart or better than others.20
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This is one of the biggest hack in my life:
We had a database project in our 2nd year of university where we had to create some complex database and input a lot of random data like postcode, names, weathers, age etc etc.
While everyone was struggling to copy paste random datas in the sql file to generate the data, I used an API from a website using Java to generate all the data.
People came to me and took me as a very brilliant person who does his project on time. I never told that to anyone5 -
I don't understand people who watch football at all... Yesterday at around 4pm France time, France was playing against Denmark I think, so my boss had the brilliant idea of making some kind of party so everyone in the company would watch that. He brought beer, make up, food and so on.
Guess what, pretty much all my coworkers stopped working on their programming projects and went to watch it, I was the only one who stayed in my office and worked on my project, yeah, i'd rather finish my PHP project than watch a bunch of brainlets running after a ball.
Boss was nice enough to bring me a drink though lol14 -
I call my git repos the field hospital.
I didn't finish my studies, but I seem to be the most qualified person to pick up the scalpel. Big corner of body bags. New brilliant ideas arrive, I do what I can with the time I have. Sometimes something survives, but it's usually too heavily mutilated to fully function. Unfinished refactorings develop into hardened scar tissue, the feature creep starts festering and leaking.
I should get better at triaging, just deleting old crap, pick one project and nurse it back to health.
But it's not easy to start with fresh focus, when your keyboard is still soaked in booze and the blood and tears of all the victims you've butchered.3 -
I've met some brilliant people in my career, the problem is, the more brilliant, the more of a jerk they are (typically, there are some exceptions though). Sure you may be incredibly smart, but no one wants to work with that kind of arrogance and it's probably why you still can't find a job.4
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tl;dr read the whole thing you lazy goat-molesting arse.
People. It's unpopular opinion time!
Windows is brilliant.
There. I said it.
Why? Because it has the balance of user-friendliness and customisability that is great for most workloads. Its enormous user- and developer- base allow almost anything you want to be done on it.
For instance, a few years ago I hooked up a MIDI synth pad to my PC and found an obscure program to use MIDI events as macros. I did not have to write any code, compile anything or any crap like that. (If you're a developer then you'll have no problem with that kind of thing, but not everyone's an über-technical nerd like you. Deal with it.)
I don't like Windows. But it's still brilliant for most people. All you Linux fan- boys/girls/helicopters are right to advocate it, but it will never expand its market share to more than the percentage of people who are developers, (unless it turns into a corporate enterprise (which it probably won't)). It has its flaws, but most of them will never affect the average end user. OK? Thanks.9 -
I wasn't the brightest when I started with computers...
I had one in my room for homework and such (an old one that mom had for work and then upgraded to a laptop).
It ran SO FREAKING SLOW and didn't have Internet (I was maybe 6, no need to pay AOL anymore than we already did).
I had a floppy disk that said" Quicken" on it... Brilliant little 6 year old me thought that JUST BY INSERTING the floppy, I could speed my computer up. Not by installing THE FINANCIAL SOFTWARE, just by putting the floppy in the drive...
I've come a little ways since then...
Note: I accidentally installed it and thought I was going to break my computer because I couldn't uninstall it (pulling the floppy out obviously didn't uninstall it)... All my experience prior to this was watching my teacher use Mac at school4 -
Well, after two hours of scratching my head, I found that angular.isNumber () returns true when you pass in a NaN. Brilliant.2
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Lately, I see a lot of rants/comments/jokes about WinRAR and its eternal trial (algorithm, is that you?). Here's a nice video explaining why WinRAR chose it as its business model and how it works: https://youtu.be/fTgZRVVr3_Y
Spoiler alert: WinRAR is brilliant.
But use 7-zip or be a command line ninja.6 -
Pubs are fucking brilliant. Walk in. Take a vacant seat. Order food and drinks for a good price. Live music. See all your local friends. Drink enough to barely make it home. Sorted16
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This happened via mail thread today.
Boss: we need this new brilliant feature I just made up and running asap! Top priority, it has to be done well, for my reputation is on the line!
Me: *looks at the specifics* 'kay, looks easy enough, this evening max and it will be ready. I just nees some extra info about what kind of data validations (I speak no accountant) are needed, and some other details (a total of 3 questiona).
B: Sure! Remember, it needs to be perfect, as my reputation is at stake. Call me on the phone and I'll give you the details!
M: Can't you answer via mail? Thua way both me and the other devs will have clewr guidelines
B: Just call me! Why do you need it to be written down? It's faster this way!
...Fine. I'll keep asking until you're ready to give me a written answer to my questions. No way I'll take security details via phone for something you want in production this evening. No chance in Hell I'll take responsibility for "misunderstanding" what you said on the phone. Why does it always has to be like that?8 -
Devs in our country are people who will allways have a job. Because companies here need us more than we need them. That's why we have 2x(jr-mid), 3x, 4x (mid), 5x+ (sr) average earnings country-wide.
Job is good, perks are nice, hardware is awesome (idk when was the last time I worked with anything weaker than i7), internet is brilliant (one of the best in the world; I think we have recently lost the "best internet in the world" title recently to some other country). Companies are fighting over us, offering better salaries, better terms. I was even bold enough to list my terms in LinkedIn's summary section and still I am getting offers :D
Devs' life is awesome here :)8 -
The obvious one:
E-Corp (aka. Evil Corp).
First they acted all evil, and then they wanted to control the world.
A brilliant business model tbh., but not very humanistic one.2 -
So we got our first household Alexa yesterday and my brothers have been asking it silly things, like:
Brother: Alexa sing baby shark:
Alexa: <sings baby shark>
B: Alexa sing mummy shark
A: <sings mummy shark>
B: Alexa sing daddy shark
A: <sings daddy shark>
B: Alexa sing grandma shark
A: "I think that's enough, even I have my limits"
Fucking Brilliant!!!4 -
Another real-world argument for why I always say git is worth learning properly.
Had to track a really weird bug down today. Had no idea where it came from, how long it'd been in the code and hadn't the foggiest what was causing it. Realistically it could have been introduced any time in the last year or two, and that's tens of thousands of commits in this repo.
Git to the rescue. Knocked up a quick script to test the case in question, fed it into "git bisect run", and 30 seconds later git found the exact (small) commit that caused the issue.
It's a brilliant part of git, yet it seems like almost no-one I know uses it. Some use "git bisect", but using "git bisect run" and passing a script to it seems to be alien to most - yet it's probably my most used tool when it comes to tracking down bugs like these.8 -
I worked at a company that was recently acquired by another one based in Poland. On my last day at work, the CEO flew out from Kraków to meet all of us personally and treated us to dinner. Soon after, we were all inducted into their hiring process, and now I'm currently waiting for my first project at the new company 😊 brilliant guy, can't wait to know him and the team better!3
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I feel all of us here could use this brilliant quote by Douglas Adams.
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.1 -
Just came home from the cinema in zurich switzerland where Samsung installed the largest 4K LED TV. Yes that's not a textile canvas in the picture, it's a wall of led tiles called Samsung ONYX. It's a real pleasure to look at. High contrasts and brilliant color. I'm in love 😍
https://goo.gl/GjsDMx
Samsung Debuts World's First 3D Cinema LED Screen Theater in ...14 -
Someone mentioned Holy C in another thread and I automatically knew they were referencing the language, based on C, and developed by Terry A Davis from Temple OS and Schizophrenic fame.
I legit felt sad for the man, he was obviously a very talented and smart programmer. You removed all the racial slurs, crazy dialogues and biblical stuff that was caused by his mental illness and you were left with a very brilliant and dedicated programmer.
While Hurd (kernel meant to replace Linux) will fucking never see the light of day after years in the making, Terry was able to generate: his own compiler for his own programming language, kernel, drivers, desktop environment, filesystem TODO by himself. I mean, fuck me dude, he even included games of his own design into the damned thing, using very advanced concepts that were present in flight simulators or doom like fps.
It just bothers me so much, the dude would have probably done amazing non-religious things if it were not for his illness.
If you like reading about this sort of thing, check him out, there are a couple of youtube videos by him. Don't be put off by the shit that he spews in some videos, remember, he was saying shit like that out of a very real mental illness.
Oh, and fuck Hurd4 -
Dunning-Kruger effect is strong with me.
Thankfully, one of the most important skills that I learned is active listening. I am less vocal about my silly thoughts and shitty opinions these days.
I don't feel dumb. Instead, I realise that I AM dumb.
The people in my new org are exceptionally smart and talented. Each everyone is a hand picked gem. This isn't a coincidence. Rather it's evident that they hire folks very carefully.
In my previous org, I used to be the one driving everything. Like the smartest guy in the room.
But here, I am just quiet in every meeting and I enjoy working 12 hours a day. I am the dumbest guy in the room surrounded by people who are brilliant and humble.
I truly feel fortunate and grateful to be part of such an amazing org and wonderful team. One of the best decisions I made in my career and life.8 -
Oh, I'm sorry if I have spoken during this meeting. I didn't realise I was invited just so I would be told "we're not going into that much detail at this stage of the project". I was just trying to point out that when you mock up any UI, you should take into account the fact that information is hierarchical: more important stuff before less important stuff, you know. Maybe you don't want to swamp the user with buttons all the time. When everything is important, nothing is. But that's just detail. And then the boss says we should create two more incongruent screens and all of the sudden that's a brilliant idea! So then again, sorry. I know exactly where my place is now. You pretend you know what you're doing and I fix it for you.1
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When you spend 3 hours looking at your project's code and debugging it to find out you forgot to add a '!' to your if condition.... Brilliant4
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1 - I have this incredible software idea
2 - I start coding right away
3 - I get stuck because I don't know how to use some function and start googling
4 - I don't find a solution for the coding problem I had, but instead I find out that someone already made the brilliant software I was trying to make, with more use cases covered, better design and stuff.
5 - I remember the uncountable times this had happened before
6 - *goddammit*
7 - Think about making a tattoo that says "google it before coding it"3 -
Biggest challenge as a dev was breaking away from the mindset that I was some brilliant, genius programmer and accepting that I like most people knew nothing. And that there was something I could learn from everyone, including my juniors.3
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Today was just marvelous. Locked up my car with keys inside and with engine on.
I was driving back home from work. I drove to a parking near home, which is really long, narrow and impossible to turn around. So I decided to get out of a car, for like, 30 secs and go check, if there were any unoccupied parking places. Parking brake; I stepped out of the car and closed the door. Click.
Brilliant.
I knew, that I needed to change contacts in the driver door, that sometimes were triggering central car lock, but I didn't expecting such outcome.
So, I am outside.
Engine is on.
Parking brake.
My backpack and phone were inside.
Luckily, one neighbor wanted to drive somewhere, so I explained, why he can't donit, why my car is here and asked to watch my car for 5 mins while I will run home.
So I ran home in home to find a second pair of keys.
After some time, LUCKILY, I found them, went back and unlocked my car...
Moral: don't delay things.. Small fixes to prolong life of some object will eventually fail in very, very uncomfortable manner.
I'm glad I found spare keys and there were no need to break my own car window... And I DO care about my car and do lot of things by myself.1 -
Coding while drunk currently in the middle of the fucking day, hopefully I wont regret this tomorrow? Who am i kidding I'm writing brilliant code i should code drunk more often2
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I'm cry-laughing.
Management wanted us to deliver a completely new feature before the holidays (see my previous rant) and they were acting really sad when we told them it is impossible. It turns out they really want it to be done, and instead of realising it is not going to happen, they are coming up with brilliant new ideas on what we should do and how should we do it on a daily basis. It was just just a little nuisance until today, listening to them and reading their mails for half an hour a day is not a big deal.
So guess what? They changed the whole fucking specification today. I can't even...6 -
For the love of God. Please stop trying to make me download your shitty mobile app. I don’t have room, and I don’t want it. I just want to read the content that YOU SENT TO ME (looking at you, Quora). Nice way to make sure I unsubscribe and never come back. An unclosable pop up on mobile that just has a button to your mobile app while I have limited data and patience doesn’t do it for me. Fuck whoever came up with THAT brilliant decision.1
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Well, devRant has turned me from a bigot arse into quite the humble and decent person, and on top of that, introduced me to some new series (well more so the users than the platform, but you know what I mean).
Binge watched Silicon Valley (season one, I just started) and learnt about dick to floor ratio.
Prior to that binge watched Mr Robot. Cannot remember who suggested that, so I cannot attribute the appropriate gratitude to the appropriate person here.
Add to that that I no longer claim one language to be holy amongst others. Yeah. I was that dick before, we all have a bad side. I'm just admitting it.
I sat down and started utilising other languages, and even found quite a few that did what I wanted more efficiently. Plus I have gotten to meet some sharp people and broaden my own mind.
Fuck I hate my job, but I see a fucking brilliant future for myself thanks to coding and the open mind that I have attained. I attribute this to devRant (perhaps it was lying dormant, but you guys awoke it.).
Enough chitty chat, I'm off to sleep and then code my balls off.2 -
It came to me, a brilliant idea, a simple solution to an everyday problem and easy route to market. Great, starts looking for domains and writes down idea in full in case i forget. Later that day, picks up 12 year old son from school, tells him my great idea. He told me how shit it was and why straight away.5
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Well for any dev's wanting to see Venom but are seeing meh scores and bad reviews, ignore them because it was fucking brilliant...14
-
Designer: "And you know what we could do? We could make all the information be available anywhere the client wants. It's all in the cloud!"
PM: "Yeah! That's brilliant!" (High fives all around)
That's one day after a visit to a client saying they cannot rely on their internet connection. -
Certified Enganeers: 0, Internet Connectivity Issues: 1
Those idiots couldn't even understand why I'd connected a second router (a DLink DIR 816) for better WiFi than their default garbage modem/router. And one of them told me that he'd login to the router by "putting the address in Google" (and proceeded to type 192.168.1.251 in the search bar, after I explained to him that Firefox was a browser too, just like Chrome -.-)
And they didn't even fix the problem, which is most probably on their end since everything checks out here. Brilliant. More shitty 3G/4G for me.
YOU CERTIFIED PIECES OF CRAP4 -
I hired 2 fresh out of school junior devs to work with me on my old web app.
They were brilliant, knew a lot of things, and were motivated.
They started complaining about how the code was shit, the db was shit, there were no best practices, the technology was old, bug fixing was boring, no comments in code.
I felt bad, very bad during 3 years, because they were absolutely right. I tried to work with them through better coding practices, rewriting, documenting etc.
Now they both have left.
I'm alone maintaining and evolving the application.
And I start to come across the code THEY developed.
What a bunch of shit. SQL queries bringing down the server. Duplicate code, because they didn't want even read the old one. Useless comments.
Performance killing functions. Exceptions swallowed without mercy. I have to clean up they poop.
I feel somewhat better, though. The application is still growing and holding the ground after many years and generating at least 800K$ per year in revenues.
Maybe better, but sad. I really wanted to share the project with somebody else but I failed, and I'm left alone....12 -
So apparently some genius motherfucker managed to allow Androids that are missing or have a bad/inaccurate/busted gyro to run VR apps as long as they have a magnetic sensor (compass) and an accelerometer, using both to spoof the gyro. It requires root, but goddamn is that smart... It's even potentially more accurate than a gyro in quite a few situations, since it uses the compass and can even be used to override the ACTUAL gyro, so if the gyro is busted, drifts like a motherfucker, is inaccurate, etc. it can alleviate the issue!
and google's always like "well this shit is impossible to do" then the community comes along a month later and does it7 -
A colleague had a brilliant idea: he bought a button which yells "NOOOOOOOOO" when pressed. So if someone enters our office and asks "He mate can you quickly... NOOOOOOO"
Serously every dev needs one of those 😂3 -
Fucking brilliant. Paused my Ubuntu VM in VMWare. Unpaused it, the whole file system is corrupted.
There goes my 2 hours of customization. Lesson learned.5 -
Never realized with a industry that changes by the second how relevant and timeless a single book(set) can remain. 52 year old book.
The work that knuth put into this collection to keep it timeless and language in-specific keeping it to theory rather than details of syntactical details is amazing.
Sure there are other timeless classics out there.. the algorithm book, K&R C, the dragon books, the wizard book.
But I think this single book outweighs them all in the abstraction point of view... AND it’s abstraction in the “opposite direction”... abstraction to a machine language architecture that is purely theoretical... brilliant.21 -
So how do you deal with the "brilliant jerk" who is the CEO's golden chlid?
Seriously - this is one of the biggest challenges of my professional career. I have team members that have begged to not be on projects with him and others that have threatened to quit if he ever moves into a leadership role.
Has anyone dealt with this?5 -
I can you about one really annoying coworker: Me.
The first thing I did as a sysadmim was to break my colleague's rc helicopter. After that I decided to learn Python, pestering him with questions once every two minutes. I developed, using the word loosely, some scripts that I wrote directly on the production servers, with predictable results.
After a while, I broke less things than I fixed. I learned a lot those years. Today I'm still amazed by the patience and knowledge of this guy; I owe most of my career to him.
These days I have a brilliant job stopping morons such as myself from breaking to many things. I try to be as patient and I hope to be as knowledgeable. -
once my professor asked our class, how will we rate ourselves on a scale of 1 to 10 on our knowledge of C language.
When we finally finished giving our answers, he told me that he'll rate himself a miserly 0.0000001, though he had brilliant knowledge of C.
I wanted to know if people here would give themselves similar rating or not?12 -
Brilliant idea time:
Inspired by @TrojanMorse and his fractal trees
A fractal tree wallpaper that grows throughout the day.
So at 12 a script starts a new fractal and only uses depth 1 (a twig). Then every other hour it branches once more so at 2 am the fractal would have depth 2 and at noon it would have depth 7. That way you get a tree growing throughout the day for your screensaver. Now to make this a thing13 -
Someone had the bright idea of going 100% on premise then only having the VPN on the server in the office building with no backup to another server. Well the power went out and no no one can work or work remotely. What a plan.2
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Anyone else suffer from this.
Have a brilliant idea, start computer, open you IDE, write a few lines of code as proof of concept and then just loose interests coz it's no longer a challenge !6 -
That log4j RCE is some fucking nasty business!!! Its exploits have already been observed multiple times in our company scope.
Time for some unplanned Saturday evening hot-patches :/
P.S. Why the fuck leave such a feature enabled as default??? I mean really, whose brilliant idea was "let's leave the message parser enabled as well as the LDAP query hooks... BY FUCKING DEFAULT!!!"
I mean really, is anyone using that? ANYONE?
And then they laugh at me when I say "stay away from frameworks", "use as little libraries as possible", "avoid foreign code in your codebase",...
you know what.... JOKE'S ON YOU!10 -
Dear new devs/me five years ago:
Practice the 30 second rule-- Whatever brilliant thing that your about to say, just think on it for minimum of 30 seconds. Is it still a brilliant idea? Then share. Else trash it 😉 -
Helping a friend who's a brilliant at mechanics and has his own patents, and got this question when downloading on his 10Mbit line:
"This was supposed to be a fast computer, so why is it taking so long to download?"
To explain the reason was surprisingly hard, considering that this is a guy who's been invited to give a lecture about innovation at a top tech university.1 -
Don't attack flies using tanks.
In 2020, a bug was found in gnome-terminal where selecting many megabytes of text inside the terminal would cause the terminal emulator to crash.
As a remedy, the brain of gnome-terminal developer Christian Persch spawned a "brilliant idea": Limiting the "Select all" feature to selecting only the portion of text that is visible on screen.
In other words, Persch made the "Select all" option useless. After pressing "Select all", it appeared as if everything was selected, but once you scrolled up, nothing beyond what was visible was selected.
By solving a minor problem that rarely ever occurs, Christian Persch created a major problem that often occurs.
Source for screenshot: https://gitlab.gnome.org/GNOME/...11 -
Finally!
My first electric guitar was around $25, and apart from terrible sound, some notes were just off or dead because of its construction. Having no money, I was demotivated because I couldn't play what I wanted not because of me, but because of my equipment. When depression struck, I quit playing guitar altogether.
Now, because of my brilliant doctors, my therapy works, and the desire to play is born again. But now I can finally get proper instruments. I'm happily relearning how to play and it finally sounds great.2 -
Day 2 in ComSci class (following my last rant)
"Okay, so! All of the schoolwork and homework will be done on paper and pen, submit and I will grade it. Only once, no second chance"
Okay. Okay. This went over my head. What are you gonna do? OCR the code into the compiler, compile it and run to see if we fucked up to give us an F? What are you, god? Here's a brilliant idea, teach them Assembly! Guaranteed error to give us Fs! FUCK YOU3 -
Can we just give a round of applause to the brilliant recruiters that decided to add Microsoft Word as a requirement.
You know...to weed out all the computer illiterate software engineers......7 -
>coding something
>come up with a brilliant idea
>coding that idea
>in that time you forgot what you have coding in the first place -
And now they are threatening us... Brilliant!
- they refuse to sign a legal agreement with us [for our services]
- they only gave us a verbal promise they will pay for our services
- they revoke lots of our accesses
- another company is taking over their product we were hired to look after before. Now they demand us do things for them for free
- a few integrations are malfunctioning with premature EOF [while reading a response]. I had escalated this with the most throughout case analysis I have done in my entire life. Three times over the last 2 years. Explaining every single detail that needs to be done, how, by whom and how to interpret the results. Escalations went to their high level mgmt. And directly had been rerouted to /dev/null...
- now they asked us to fix this whole shit. For free ofc, they have no money to pay us..
- they begged
- when that didn't work - they started threatening to route all their customers' complaints to us and flood us with them
at first I was proud to work on their project. I didn't want to leave it when my manager asked me to. A national level project, making a difference for my own country. But now.....
that's gov, my friends. That's politics and power games.8 -
First it was the "set up WampServer so the client can use our database", to which I told her we should use an embedded database, to which she told me to do.
Then the "Just give the client a .jar file and install the JRE in his laptop" to wich I told her we can make a native installer, to which she fucking assigned to me.
Then the whole fucked up management thing with no design whatsoever and the "we don't need version control".
To just a few hours earlier, when she got mad because I set up a Slack for us to exchange information easily, she told me she was already mad because I shared the project by Google Drive and that she worked in security and knows the risk... AND AT THE SAME TIME, she uses Gmail to share the project.. BRILLIANT !7 -
Definitely Docker.
Do whatever you want, whenever you want.
The pinnacle of flexibility.
Try out everything, without installing anything.
Deploy with the same environment you're developing with on your local machine.
It's brilliant! -
It is only now that I can finally appreciate how brilliant PHP is.
When you're new to programming, you write some HTML + CSS, it looks good, but the dynamic part is missing. So, you install PHP and just… write dynamic parts right in your HTML? How crazy is that? You can even write regular code there too! Errors are logged right away, common features like DB driver and sessions are built in…
It's all about marketing. Next.js does exactly the same thing when they brag about writing SQL in React. When they do it, it's revolutionary. When PHP does it, PHP bad. Gotcha fam 🫤12 -
As a final year student it makes me feel proud about things I do now, back in 2014 I was newbie to programming and after the years of study ( I skip collages in order to study by my self at home since my syllabus is too old for me to keep up with new technologies. ) I still feel like shit against brilliant programmers on the internet.
My journey untill now was frustrating and side by side it was fun too, I have spent several days to figure out very minor problems in my programme which made me forced to learn even more in order to avoid silly mistakes in future.
Those four lines of output were really true worth of that forty lines of code.
Every one of us, in their entire life at least once had thought about which programming languages to learn first and yes I was one of those guy who used to search on Google, watched YouTube videos and asked seniors for the same advice but soon I realized it's never enough to completely learn even one language. Each and every programming language is based on similar logical structure. No matter how different it's syntax is it won't make much of a difference.
I am thankful to internet and all of those guys who make video tutorials, help on q&a forum (stack overflow) , publish posts on website and all of IT community guys. I made it this far it's all thanks to you and I know it's just beginning of spectacular journey ahead.undefined thanks programmer programming quote blog blogging journey life of programmer life internet it crowd2 -
Fuck me Doom: Eternal is brilliant. People said what they liked and disliked about Doom 2016 and they just listened. Imagine that!9
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Not a rant, of course, as life is amazing but...
... Here is a rare, beind the scenes look at what happens on the back end of our office.
Wishing you all a brilliant fucking' day from Bulgaria's Black Sea coast...11 -
What developer/team thought that this would be a fucking brilliant option to put in this in a game?
Btw there is no VSync option, just “Limit to 30 FPS”11 -
!dev
So one of our project allows paying in money in different currenceis, and we have few bank accounts that are "outter shell" that are monitored and properly titled wire transfer will work for paying in for certain customer. Simple. So far.
We also have +- 20-30 different bank accounts for different purposes, I dont rly know why. Im just a programmer here. Anyway, I have no idea how and why but apparently one of our partners somehow put his hands on list of our bank acc's. Welp, i should be allright, what can possibly go wronggg.... wait... what?
He had this brilliant idea to streamline more process of "go to app, press button, you will be presented with proper bank acc for you". So he did. He sent mass email to all his customers that here are all bank acc's, use wahtever to pay in. Most of acc's are unmonitored.
This went wrong and we figured out becouse mail of pissed customer....
Congratulations, my friend. You earned "I am idiot" tatoo on forehead. Visit me to redeem your reward. -
what an absolute condescending garbage post...
"brilliant coder who can't meet a deadline"? well, you're the idiot right there, you just admitted it - they are brilliant and you don't know how to set deadlines
imagine labeling someone who can't meet a workload DIFFICULT! god this is making me fucking fume
"normal management" - yeah this is normal management alright, treating everyone like they don't know what they are doing and expecting them to follow you blindly, sounds pretty normal to me
it's shit like this that leads to cocky ass young dumb managers who actually don't know shit about building a product themselves, but then turn around and think they instead have the ability to manage a team to do it... incredible15 -
!rant
3 weeks ago started to play diablo 2 again.
Just realised it's not a 3D game .
Progammers had done a brilliant job !2 -
Sister: why haven't you come up with a brilliant idea and built an app like Facebook/Twitter/Snapchat/Instagram?
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Me: Ok time to save money, have a trip to melbourne coming up, save for a house, car and wedding... Brilliant...
Internet: Oh hey you know how you wanted a smartwatch that was not sporty looking and has NFC, heres the Ticwatch C2!
Me: I hate my life...
Internet: also heres some of the programming theory books you wanted on sale!
Me: starts tying noose
Why must saving money be so bloody hard when everything you've wanted just pops up .-.3 -
I'm reading (deciphering) the clients notes for modifications to their app and explaining to my PM what they want. At one point, he stopped me and said "How the fuck are you doing that? I don't understand how you can make those connections. Brilliant." 😂
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I'm so sick of microservice architecture... in theory it was going to make scaling elastic and deployment easier. In reality it seems to slow productivity to a 🐌 pace.
Anyone have any brilliant suggestions on how to herd these cats in production?10 -
Brilliant Stakeholder: of course communication with our backend will be encrypted with an algorithm I'll confidentially share with you once the contract is signed
Senior Developer: npm install md51 -
There is this shitty database that still exists. It's called CrateDB. It's a SQL layer on a NoSQL. I don't know whose brilliant idea was that but any which way, IT SUCKS. Documentation said that the latest version supports table joins. Yeah, join queries take just ~300 seconds to run. Congratulations!2
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So i have been working as a graduate developer in this company i joined 5 months ago with some other graduates. I was on probation and it was supposed to end in near future but it got extended because " i was not being punctual". The feedback i got was " you are technically brilliant and have done all the tasks you have been asked to do but aren't being punctual and coming late to the office sometimes ".
I am indeed at fault that i sometimes enter the office late like 5-10 mins from the mentioned range. But whenever that has happened i always made it up while working late at work, this is my first job and even though i was being funny with the manager when we were discussing this i am not so happy right now, is it a big enough reason for extension ? Do you think if it can become a reason for termination ? Some other graduates have their probation extended cause of other reasons like late task completion.
Just need to understand how badly am i fucked.9 -
I fucking hate corporate environment. We have a weekly meeting in our tech department where a team is chosen at random to present the project they're working on, architecture and such. You know what? We have fucking documents, for both product scope and technical architecture. If you're interested in our work, go fucking read our docs. If you have a question, slack us or send us a fucking email. Why the fuck do I have to attend a 1-hour meeting every week for this bullshit. Oh and some dude from upper management has a brilliant idea: from today they decide to host 2 such meetings per week, 1 within the tech department, and another within the whole company. So we had to attend the same fucking meeting twice in 1 week!!! Fucking genius!
I'm so fucking tired of these meaningless meetings, but attendance is recommended because "this is how you reach staff level" as they told me. Fucking bullshit. I may try a few more years for the sake of financial stability, and then find a small shop where people just leave me the fuck alone with my codes.4 -
about 2 weeks ago my mom's friend's family visit our house. one moment they introduce their brilliant son going to take Computer Science Major, and they didn't understand why, and apparently they are some kind of ignorant family. So my role here are to advertise and promote the world of CS (since i know their son are good at programming). one moment i am diving to deep into my own speech, i am like :
"I believe you guys using facebook, and Whatsapp all the time **give a smirk and sarcastic look* (which they actually did), that is our work there. and maybe you (my mom's friend) love to play candy crush with my mom, yes that is also our work, and we got a lot of money from you buying the candy to unlock the hard level (the microtransaction thing) MUAHAHAHAHA !" ---
and yes i am laughing like a monster in a film. and suddenly that becoming the most awkward thing i ever had.
and i don't know should i feel bad or not introducing CS like that.3 -
Daghhhhhhhh Kafka.
Set it up, seems to work fine.
Oh no...! Take a broker down, then messages go missing - hmm, that's not right. Fine, I'll just look into... Ah, bad replication factor, my fault. So then it's all fixed! Woop. Wait, no. Some messages still going missing occasionally. Oh, only set to "at most once" delivery. My bad, fix that, and... now everything is out of order. Oh, ok, partitions setup wrongly. Wtf, now the whole thing stalls when there's a network blip until a restart. Right, ok, looks like commits have to receive acks in the library I'm using before continuing. Switch to a library that uses CommitWithoutReply. Brilliant....
Apart from said library seems to have commits failing all over the place because it keeps trying to commit during a rebalance 🙄😒😤
The frustrating thing is I KNOW for a fact that Kafka is a fault tolerant, resilient, horizontally scalable thing capable of handling stupid amounts more than I'm throwing at it without missing a beat. But damn,configuring it, and checking you've configured it sanely is a royal, monumental PITA.5 -
A brilliant letter Richard Feynman wrote to Stephen Wolfram:
CALIFORNIA INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY
CHARLES C. LAURITSEN LABORATORY OF HIGH ENERGY PHYSICS
October 14, 1985
Dr. Stephen Wolfram
School of Natural Sciences
The Institute for Advanced Study
Princeton, NJ 08540
Dear Wolfram:
1. It is not my opinion that the present organizational structure of science
inhibits "complexity research" - I do not believe such an institution is
necessary.
2. You say you want to create your own environment - but you will not be doing
that: you will create (perhaps!) an environment that you might like to work in
- but you will not be working in this environment - you will be administering
it - and the administration environment is not what you seek - is it? You won't
enjoy administrating people because you won’t succeed in it.
You don’t understand "ordinary people." To you they are "stupid fools" - so you
will not tolerate them or treat their foibles with tolerance or patience - but
will drive yourself wild (or they will drive you wild) trying to deal with them
in an effective way.
Find a way to do your research with as little contact with non-technical people
as possible, with one exception, fall madly in love! That is my advice, my
friend.
Sincerely,
(Signed, 'Richard P. Feynman')1 -
Onthisday in 1912, brilliant Codebreaker, genius computer scientist, Alan Turing was born.
As we remember his remarkable life, and tragic death. -
I just found out last Friday that my team collegues (all of them are team leads) are suffering from depression or the so called burn out syndrom. I guess it's my boss' fault. He never gives clear jobs, changes his mind from day to day, we have to manage unclear responsibilities and the baddest thing is that we think that our boss is too stressed out himself.
Do you have any advice for me how we as team could solve that besides changing employer? One thing to mention is, that my boss likes to hear himself talking. That makes it even harder for a guy like myself who is more or less introverted to come up with good arguments which are not overheard or overtalked immediately. What are your feedback strategies to your own boss, how do you bring such stuff on the table?
I fear that when nothing happens, my company will suffer very hard when the whole product engineering departement will fall apart (¼ of the whole company and is responsible for engineering and maintaining of internal services and managed services for our customers).
Well at least it was worth writing about it, maybe my subconcious mind will come up with a brilliant idea itself in the near future in some asynchronous way. But you might be the one with that valuable input, then don't hesitate to share, it will be welcome.4 -
"Don't fall for the hype. A lot of ideas, groups and methodologies are basically cults trying to advertise their consulting services. While I have no problem with that, just remember that when you run into one of these guys and they are quick to shit on the alternatives to their way (and those who built them) to always be very suspicious."
Context:
We had the opportunity to meet 2 very bright people who were heads of their respective communities in a similar area. They were both talking a lot of shit, and getting kinda harsh.
A brilliant dev I worked with, who knew both people for years, took me aside and told me this.
Some cults have cool shit, just don't drink the kool-aid -
I learned how to program during my MSc at UC Santa Barbara in 1988. But the real thing happened during my first job as software engineer at Chorus Systems, in Paris, with the guidance of some of the world's best mentors, Russian engineers who taught me how to approach code design as if it was playing chess. These guys were brilliant!2
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Another day, another company that doesn’t live up to its own hype.
This time interviewing for a company that only want people who are willing to start with the language they currently know but learn other programming languages and not shy away from new things.
Brilliant, I’m up for that. I love learning and want to be at a place that values learning. I’ve got 20+ years of experience and I’ve learnt all sorts in that time to stay relevant. Currently I’m a c# dev, but I’ve worked on projects using JavaScript & Typescript, Angular, React etc. Done front end and back end, taught myself mongo and architecture. Point is that I have a proven track record of learning.
To cut a long story short, they give me a .net test. Nothing special about it. I have a 4 hour chat. And a week later I’m rejected because I don’t do Python. WTF?!
I thought this place was all about allowing people to learn if they were willing, not about what they know right now. I’m calling bullshit.7 -
When I think "the fundamental problem", the closest thing that comes to my mind is "unsolvable problem". P =/!= NP is a fundamental problem, the theory of everything is a fundamental problem.
But we actually solved at least one such problem – the fundamental problem of cryptography.
The problem was "how to establish a secure connection over a non-secure channel?" Like you can't exchange the key, it'll be exposed by definition.
We solved it with a simple yet brilliant solution of asymmetrical cypher, that thing with public and private keys.
It's fascinating to think that people died in WW2 over this, there were special operations to deliver fresh deciphering keys securely and now SSH and HTTPS are no-brainers that literally everyone use.10 -
So these days (since yesterday), I am using an iPhone. Mom’s phone broke and she wanted an android, and I wanted to fiddle with iPhone... So she took my OnePlus 3 and got me an iPhone 6s.
I like iOS as long as it works.
But... I FREAKING HATE that the App Store has country specific rating. You will only see the ratings/reviews of your countrymen.
Whose frigging brilliant idea was that!!! 😡😡😡
Now I have most apps (like beam and narwhal for reddit) showing as unrated.
M so pissed off at this 😩😩 -
Whoever came up with the "brilliant" idea of having different date formats should be punched in their face! Stop inventing all sorts of idiotic local standards for every little freaking thing! This goes for Americans and Europeans alike! FFS! Why can't everybody just agree on using yyyy-MM-dd, the only correct and sensible date format?! Sweden is the only country that I know has got it right.15
-
Some years ago but it's funny.
The company give to me a new laptop with windows Home Edition,
After few months I have installed Pro Version.
1 month later the laptop didn't work anymore, nothing on display, no beeps, zero.
Tried to replace ram and check but nothing works.
The CTO asked the supplier and they asked about SO, and they said it's not turning ON because i have installed Windows Pro.
Than the CTO had a brilliant idea: try put the hard disk in another laptop and install Windows Home, and put back in the defective one. I refused to to that, it's stupid and he insisted, then I put the laptop in his desk and I said: if you want do this you can do, im not stupid enough to do this.
He got really mad, 1 week later i got a brand new one 😅5 -
http://ai-junkie.com is a brilliant website - it's finally allowed me to understand neural networks and genetic algorithms properly!4
-
!rant: first time building an application on a framework. The view is amazing from up here on these giant's shoulders. Thanks to all of those brilliant people making my life easier.2
-
My first gig straight out of uni was on a project where my role required fixing an FTP client to upload files from a clients machine to our server. It was a spreadsheet. VBA. An excel spreadsheet. FTP client. A spreadsheet.
Me: "why are we using VBA for this?"
PM (was a dev 10+ years ago and started the basics of this 'ftp client'): "VBA is great." *Stern face*
Brilliant3 -
Code review:
i ? plus.push(i) : --i ? neg.push(i) : zeros.push(i) || printThis() || checkAge() || !!window.MediaSource...
F***ing such a brilliant programmer, spent 4 hours to write it in 1 line, and will take your the guy who replaces you 4 hours to decipher, why are you so adverse to writing #readablecode?!!!
\n is cheap, if(){} is too
This isn't math class where a 3 line proof gets you kudos, stop wasting my time with your genius.1 -
dude fuck fucking salesforce i fucking hate the day someone came up with the brilliant ass idea of inventing this garbage crm software that i must deal with even though it is not my area. i fucking hate the developer experience to do third-party implementations, not letting you upload changes to another environment for the sake of """"good practices"""", the fucking interface is slow as shit i could've already had intense hto sex, taken a shit, cook lunch and sleep 2 hours before it can load a single retarded lightning page.
why? WHY? WHYYY? WHY MUST THIS ASSWARE EXIST? WHY?
AS A FACT I'VE WRITTEN THIS RANT BEFORE THE DAMN PAGE EVEN LOADED A CONFIGURATION SECTION. GOD HELP US.5 -
Mobilis in mobili.
Yesterday, I was trying to figure out how to open a folder via the linux terminal (like the `open path/to/folder` in MacOS), and I discovered that it can be done via `nemo path/to/folder`. This rang a bell on me because I know that GNOME file manager was named Nautilus.
This got my interest because both names are in Jules Verne's "Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea". Nautilus is the submarine commanded by the great Capt. Nemo, a brilliant individual who plans to explore the depths of the sea with Nautilus.
I learned that the developers of Linux Mint believed the GNOME file manager Nautilus (v3.6) was a catastrophe, and thus, they forked project, giving birth to the awesome Nemo. So instead of exploring the depths of the sea, I guess we could say Nemo is now exploring the depths of our filesystem, right? -
!rant
Building on https://devrant.com/rants/1654019/...
It's coming along nicely, I've been working on different themes and I'm still making the tree more natural.
Next is to make the number of branches each time more random, and then I'll maybe add leaves. I might even add a day/night cycle, but we'll see once the code is further along and the automatic background updater is made.4 -
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!!!
so it seems that instead of windows updating and restarting without user consent, now they ask you every few hours to restart your pc and install ''The newest windows features''. It's insanely annoying! And why the fuck am i receiving updates every single day, sometimes even few times a day. This is way more annoying than windows updating itself every now and then.
Get fucked !!!!!! (whoever thought this is a brilliant idea)4 -
!rant
In relation to https://devrant.com/rants/1643249/...
The tree has started!
The lovely pycairo package was super easy to pick up, and I made a rather shitty looking fractal tree with it!
Next step is to figure out a color scheme I like, and to make the tree look more natural/better.
It's happening guys3