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Search - "what's that"
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Girlfriend: What's your biggest fear?
Me: That machines take over the world.
Girlfriend: What?
Toaster: What?12 -
Happened just now:
Client: Please remove this page from the site ASAP, and tell me when its done.
Me: Done
Client: what's wrong am getting an error code(404) when I click on the link.
Am not sure how to reply to that13 -
Me: I use Git!
Classmates: what's that? A Softdrink?
Me: Nevermind. Just Copy the source code on gooogle drive.
Classmates: Thanks!
Me: -_-25 -
Mother (working in recruitment): "What's the difference between JavaScript and Java?"
Me: "I'm glad you finally asked that..."10 -
I recently won a "Hack the Bank" competition where I had to hack an ATM and withdraw a large sum of money.
But what's funny, is that after the competition ended, the organizers installed Kali on the actual ATM.19 -
Me : Let's just use CDN.
Former boss (fb) : What's that?
Me : You fetch JS and CSS files online. Faster.
Fb: No! Download it!
Me: Why?
Fb: What if there's no internet?!
Me: ... it's a website...18 -
At the Apple Store in my devRant hoodie and got noticed by an employee..
Her: what's your username?
Me: brod 😬, what's yours?
Her: julia! Have you seen the new MacBook Pro?
...
Turns out, there's no @julia, now I have a $2,800 MacBook that I didn't need (nope, not the pro, just the shit one).53 -
What's the worst bug? Schrödinger's bug, one that only appears when the debugger is not attached, and your test instruments are disabled.12
-
So I've started my Python adventure and made an app that lets me know what's my next lesson in school. It shows lesson, subject and time.6
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Co-worker: Hey man, what's up with your code?
Me: What do you mean bro?
Co-worker: It's generic man...
Me: Isn't it supposed to be like that?
Co-worker: Yeah...
Me: ... so what's this about?
Co-worker: hmmm... Mine is kinda specific, do you mind changing it so that it can work well with mine??
Me: That's why I made it generic though
Co-worker: yeah I see that and I dnt want mine to be and we have a deadline tomorrow. I already pushed mine to develop so, happy fun-time while modifying your code to accommodate mine...
Me: *fuuxuuuuuuuuuuuux*6 -
That moment when you've been sat on the toilet reading devRant so long that your legs have gone dead so when you try to stand up you faceplant the opposite wall :-/
devRant is bad for my health !
EDIT: what's more embarrassing is I lay on the floor writing this rant.7 -
Just made a laser sentry tower for my cats. Next up is adding some tracking so it can play with them by itself while I'm at work and after that I'm adding a Wi-Fi module and camera so that i can also play with them while I'm at work... I couldn't resist using a mouse to top it off 😂17
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Don't mind me, just writing maintainable, legible, commented and documented code. What's that, an email validation? Let me just
/^(([^<>()\[\]\.,;:\s@\"]+(\.[^<>()\[\]\.,;:\s@\"]+)*)|(\".+\"))@(([^<>()[\]\.,;:\s@\"]+\.)+[^<>()[\]\.,;:\s@\"]{2,})$/i11 -
Friend: So what's the plan for Christmas
Me: Nothing much just coding
Friend: No apart from work
Me: Yeah coding
Friend: That means, you not getting drunk or laid this Christmas
Me: No, because I can't C Sharp when coding
Friend: Fuck developers2 -
I don't wanna be that guy that posts jokes here but thought this one was pretty good:
What's the most popular language in programming?...
...Profanity6 -
Them: "Could you send the password in an encrypted mail?"
Me: "Yea sure, what's your GPG public key?"
Them: "What's that? Can't you just encrypt it?"
Me: "Nvm, do you have Signal?"6 -
*Opens a python script*
*A non-dev coworker appears*
Cw: Wow! What's that? A programming language?
Me: Yep, it's a python script.
Cw: It looks like some NASA's stuff. You guys are really crazy.
Me: ...8 -
Mum: "What's that?"
Me: "A book on the new version of JavaScript."
Mum: "Is that like Java?"
Me: "..."12 -
If you get the "What's your greatest weakness" question make sure to answer "honesty". That way when they say "I don't think honesty is a weakness", you say, "I don't care what you think."1
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Everytime I tell someone I write scripts and test security of new hardware/software, I get
"oh that's so cool, what's that called?"
"penetration testing"
*Room goes silent and wide-eyed*2 -
Girlfriend: There are so many passwords to remember, man. What's my amazon password, baby?
Me: Just use a password manager?
Girlfriend: That sort of thing exists?12 -
Just found a stackoverflow thread that had no answer and 2 comments. Here are the comments:
Person 1: Did you find a solution for this?
Author: Yes, please email me [...@gmail.com].
Bruh, what's wrong with some people???? Writing nothing at all would be better then that7 -
When one of your staff members asks "what's a file path?" It's times like these that I am ever so grateful that @dfox hooked me up with a squishy ball.13
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Client: Could you build me a clone of this app? *Link to an app that probably took a full team of developers a year to build*
Me: What's your budget look like for this?
Client: About 500 bucks.
Pretty much a daily conversation.3 -
Mom: Oh cool! So you can hack sites and accounts now?
Me: No mom.. I'll be making stuff, not breaking it.
Mom: Well what's the fun in that 😐
Me: ...4 -
News: Microsoft is buying GitHub.
Me: Lets Gather money with patreon / crowdfunding to buy MicroSoft.
Let's end that shit Forever.
What's your opinion.18 -
Aww SwiftKey, after two letters youre suggesting the right password, that's so nice of you...
Wait a minute... WHY DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT?
You're not a password manager and you don't do that with other passwords, what's wrong with you?4 -
My internship so far :
-SVN
-Visual Basic
-A company proprietary framework that I won't ever use again
-Windows everywhere
It kinda fails my technical expectations. But what's great is that everyone there is very nice and relaxed, Nerf gun fights at 4pm and playing cards after lunch :D3 -
Found my missing flash drive... at the bottom of my broken washing machine... *sigh*
So I've got a broken Windows installation, destroyed flash drive and a washing machine that decided to explode and trip all circuit breakers in the building... what's next?21 -
Working on a database priorly designed and maintained by some private agency.
The fuck I'm dealing with!
Boolean values stored as 'TRUE'/'FALSE'. It's varchar, my dudes.
There are no FK relations. Just the values of IDs in a column.
There are no indexes, all on just the PKs, nothing else. Nothing.
Null, what's that? I'm dealing with 'N/A', my dudes.
Unique key, what's that? The table which stores users has all the fields nullable. Email is not unique ( even though that's the required behaviour).
ALL the numeric values are stored as varchar. Varchar, my dudes. Varchar. '1', '1.1'
And finally, the good ole, 1 table to rule them all. Normalisation, fuck that.
And what's the root cause of all this? My PM used to hand them Excel sheets she maintains on her local system. FTW. I don't have a enough explanations.7 -
What's your favorite shell alias that you made for yourself?
I use this one all the time:
squash () {
git rebase -i HEAD~${1}
}
Runner up though is `git-fuckit` which resets everything to origin/master.13 -
* online meeting *
Why are ya'll muted? We can't have a conversation if you're all muted. Just unmute yourselves.
* someone had a lot of background noise *
Huh? What's happening? What's that noise? I think someone is in a very noisy place. You know what? Just mute yourselves until you want to talk.
THATS WHAT WE WERE DOING YOU PRICK4 -
From a co-worker:
That feeling of fear, when you gave your girlfriend the password to your PC, and after a few days she asks you "what's up with that 'sudo' thingy you type in all the time?"...2 -
Worst part of working from home?
Coworkers who just leave a "hi" message when you're away and you have to reach out to them separately to ask them what's going on.
This isn't for casual daily greetings either. I've often ignored these "hello" messages only to find out that the sender had something urgent for me.
If you want to say something, why not leave it in the message itself? What's my immediate availability got to do with anything?22 -
Manager: How's the site going. Can I see it?
Dev: ya sure
M: what's that
Dev: that's a * it means some restrictions apply.
M: hmmmm
M: make it a diamond4 -
Yeah GDPR emails are annoying, but you know what's worse? People complaining about GDPR emails!
And you know what's worse than that?
People complaining about people complaining about GDPR emails
And you know what's worse than that?
...4 -
I am 21 and I just found out that I have rheumatoid arthritis in my fingers
I think a little part, no ,a huge chunk inside of me just died.
Why the fuck does life keep piling shit...
what's the fucking point....35 -
Why do users find it so hard to understand short and clear error messages that are in place to inform them what's going wrong? Why do they instead waste my time when the message clearly says that the password is too short and hasn't got any special characters? FFS!4
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Mom bought me this mousepad... Written in visual basic...
What's worse is that the code has five lines that have been commented out5 -
I'm truly and deeply bothered by
import {Object} form "module"
instead of
import { Object } from "module"
What's worse is that I'm bothered by the fact that I'm bothered about this as I'm normally able to laugh away discussions about syntax A being better than syntax B.6 -
Hello! I am a hobbyist game Developer.
I recently made a game for Android and I would really appreciate it if you downloaded it! I am open to your critique at what's good and what's not! Anything that you think would make the game better?
https://play.google.com/store/apps/...28 -
What's your Holy Grail for long hours of coding?
Something that helps you concentrate perhaps?
Mine is: Spotify
Switch it on and get lost in code 😁16 -
there's a dev on my train and I can see everything.... in vscode, at least he has that, damn java devs.
What's the social code for interaction here?rant screen sharing privacy does not exist hey nice class you have there blue theme guy dev on train it hurts my eyes17 -
That awkward moment when you made some changes in your code and hope that it will fail so that you can confirm your theory/suspicion.
Otherwise you'll have no idea what's going on.
: /3 -
What's the most bullshit marketing term you've heard being used? Something that sounds flashy for a non tech client, but makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
I just heard "harnessing hyperconnectivity". The fucks that?3 -
We use the best source control software, it allows build and deploy like no other, are you familiar with Visual Source Safe?
I don't know what's worse... That I'm old enough to know what that is; that I know how to use it; the question; or the fact that the maintenance of it stopped 12 years ago...2 -
Manager: What's your time estimate on that latest ticket?
Dev: It's literally written in the "time estimate" field on the ticket, even in standard human units like "hours", "minutes", and "seconds"
Manager: ...
Dev: ...9 -
Fucking gimmicks.
You know what the worst experience in technology is? A virtual keyboard. FUCK typing on a smooth piece of glass.
What's the solution? Attachable real keyboard. That blocks the bottom of the screen. Making it a normal laptop. Fuck off.7 -
Me: "hey CEO, that product that's only had 3 devs on for a couple of years has grossed a million brit bucks 2 years running. Any chance we could get some laptops for the team that aren't heavy as fuck and 4-5 years old. Maybe some monitors that aren't tiny and dull as fuck?"
CEO: "no"
Also, what's people's dream dev gear?9 -
What's that name of that classic fairytale about that boy that struggles with build automation?
...
Hansel and Gradle -
Why developers like yellow ducks only, what's wrong with white duck?
Is that what they call racism??8 -
Look at the image first, please.
Me: "What's that?"
Closed devRantron.
"Hmm, still there."
Closed browser.
"Nope, that wasn't it neither."
Closed everything that is somehow connected to the internet: FTP client, SSH connections, even the VM.
"There's still something! What is it?!"
Bashed my head against the wall.
"I am listening to music right now... music from the NAS..."2 -
When you sit down to work on a project and you just can't figure it out. Next thing you know it's 3am, so you clamber into bed. Nodding off, nice and cosy when suddenly: What's that brain? You've figured it out?1
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Joined a call during a potentially important life event. Work laptop password expired this morning, personal laptop didn't connect to vpn, desktop not connecting to vpn. No one knew what's wrong on the call (just that it's not working).
Not a good call.1 -
What's worse than a written test? A written test for web programming! Seriously, how do they expect us to write CSS for a full fledged page when even they know that it's just wololo magix4
-
Now I know for sure that my coworkers can't read error messages.
Every fucking time git doesn't push or pull properly they can't figure out what's going on, almost one year since we migrated to git ... come on... read the fucking message!7 -
WHAT'S NEW
We removed some things that weren’t working properly, fixed some things that weren’t working properly, and added some things that might not work properly. -
When you tell collegue A that you are nominating collegue B for the "Bleep award" (the person that swears alot) and person B overhears some words and comes to see what's up and says.
B: what's happeneing here?
A: we nominating people for awards
B: fuck that shit
I'm actually happy with my vote now3 -
A lot of people seeing the devRant app on my phone:
What's that?
I always answer:
A safe place for developer ;)
What are your one sentence descriptions for this awesome app? ;)15 -
Me : Can I have your Server Access to deploy project.
Client : I don't have server. I will run it on my laptop.
Me : Okay, Are you sure? And do you have static IP?
Client : what's that?
😂1 -
One of my clients (who's also a developer) asked me today "Are you on devrant?"
Me: "What's that😑?"3 -
What's up with this "funny" tag that everyone is using with their rant? If your rant is funny then we'll automatically laugh.4
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I'm on a call collecting requirements to a feature request that was developed last year, deployed last month, and nobody has a fucking clue about what's going on.
I'm also getting told that my requirements won't work, when they clearly will.
What's fucking crazy? In the time that I have wasted on this topic, I could have already written the fix.1 -
People:
- human brain is imperfect, makes too many mistakes
- let's make a computer that could perform perfect precise calculations
- computers are imperfect, require a set of clearly predefined rules [by human] to operate
- let's create a computer that behaves like human brain - an AI
- ...
Guess what's gonna be the next entry :)18 -
Any doctor here that happens to also know git?
What's with recruiters looking for doctor and git?14 -
After long time logged into windows desktop and dared to open internet explorer then I seen option
"What's New in Internet Explorer 8"
So I thought let's see what's new in IE8
When I clicked on that option, suddenly my CPU fan stopped working.
There was no connection between them,
But what a coincidence!
F***U IE:D2 -
"it's the software that's causing the problem not the hardware (that I picked)"
*extensive research is done by technicians and senior developer*
"what's the problem?"
"shit hardware (that you picked)" -
What's everyone's favorite esoteric programming language? Mine is PIET. This image is a PIET program that interprets BrainFuck code (NOT written by me). 😂
Source & Info: http://dangermouse.net/esoteric/...6 -
Little brother: "Since you're an SE I have a really important question that requires your skills.
Me: Okay what's up? (getting excited for potential project)
Little brother: Can you hack my ex girlfriends Facebook?
Me: *face palm* -
What's the worst lie you've ever told a client?
That year, I told mine that we have to pay $100 for a GitHub repository to store the code and keep it safe from bugs...
I am still laughing at myself 😂😂.11 -
I absolutely hate my math class....
But... what's this!!!? You're using an old ass website that uses a JSON API to send my lesson scores to my school's grading website?
Well damn... wouldn't it be a shame if someone were to somehow tap into that API and override the grades for each assignment?5 -
Has anyone noticed that rants here have a pulse?
Yesterday was a VIM day. Today is windows-sucks day.
What's the tomorrow's topic? Anyone has an agenda?
*whoppsie, wrong tag12 -
Ok so my pc is running again.
Time to put some Marilyn Manson on while I code.
Oh wait, what's that? Can't play music? For the 5th time today, fuck you Microsoft.3 -
what's the thing that reminds you, that you are a developer?
I said "the time complexity of finding my car in this parking lot is n factorial".11 -
Serious question, what's so great about using Macs for programming and dev work? Junior dev here and all my colleagues and superiors can't stand them.
Is there actually a technic benefit that I'm missing?59 -
You know what's cool working for a company that uses Github for version control? My contributions on my profile are going through the roof and I expect will make me look like an open source hero!
-
I HATE automated messages on Slack
Remove fucking GitHub updates, Jira updates, all this stupid bullshit that pollutes actual communication between humans in all that fucking shit and makes me miss actual messages because I ignored a channel where that garbage cancer shit was set up on?
What's wrong with going to fucking Jira and GitHub and checking how things are going THERE?7 -
1. a client asks you to create an API for their system
2. you do what's requested
3. a year later you are curious how's that API doing. Client's devs decided to
[
"com.client.app.some.Datamodel$Subclass",
{
"someField": [
"java.util.ArrayList",
["SMTH","SMTH_ELSE"]
]}
]
sure, why not, right.....?9 -
// Tired as fuck adventures, yay
I was once coding and researching for a school project, it was around 1AM (yeah, I'm a pussy that needs to sleep at 12AM, otherwise I'm useless all the day long) and a friend was with me, he was doing another stuff.
Suddenly, out of the blue, he asks me "Hey, how much is 12 multiplied by 430?", so I say "Let me check", press Win+R, type "notepad", enter, write operation and wait looking at the screen.
"why this does not work?" I thought for some seconds until I realized I fucking typed in notepad and not in the calculator.
Just laughed my ass off and went straight to sleep. Until today, my friend thinks I'm deranged.1 -
I don't understand people who write "Fu*k" instead of "Fuck", dude everyone know what's that means anyway and you definitely not going to become a Honorable man or you will go to heaven by doing this. Seriously.11
-
Deep Thought Rant
It's funny how the world works these days...companies only looking for "senior *something*" developers to work...
Mentorship and internship also do matter. What's happening?...sure you can contribute to open source but having a mentor also helps. Working as an intern allows one to see not only tech bit but workplace environment. How to deal with deadlines, feeling good and wasted at the same time when one bug that took a 3 minutes to fix but 3 hours to find, presenting your work; well what's working only, being bashed when it's your fault or not (even though that sucks), learning from your mentor and so on
Are their companies that still do this?3 -
On today's episode of devRant we have..... 🥁
No really, What's new in the world on this windy, cold, miserable, wait what day is it again? Oh Wednesday, I seriously had to look that up.
COVID staycation is blending the days together now.15 -
Copy cat bandit strikes again!!
Can he EVER come up with anything original?? Yo Zuck, what's going on with that TilTok clone of yours? What's it called...."Lasso" ? 😑5 -
This website sucks. I sign up and first thing I see is a clusterfuck UI. I can't tell what's going on.
Then the morons who made the UI decided that the "new post" button was going to be on the bottom middle position.33 -
Anyone that tries to solve my Stackover flow question, gets down voted 😂 What's worst, I got down voted after 20mins. Worst, it can't be solved! Fuck! Guess no sleeps tonight19
-
What's actually the case ??
Some PPL say that if u want to be a great developer you should start using Linux immediately. Why is it like that 🙄29 -
Swift changes syntax again! Apple is treating their language like an Apple product. Why can't they decide? What's that? you have a project? Goodluck converting your code when we decide to change everything ;)6
-
When you emphatically explain the code you've been working on non-stop for the past week, only to have the boss hit you with that "but what's the point?"
And your heart fucking breaks3 -
Oh really? I don't even have Java on my LinkedIn/CV, what the hell man? These freaking automated email are starting to piss me off!
Recruiters are the worst cancer in the modern job hunting4 -
Came across an app that I really liked, but unfortunately, development has ceased for it. That also means I can't pay for it in order to get a license key. So what's a developer to do?
DECOMPILE it
After decompiling it, I placed inside the code that I paid for the app 😂
.field public static final MARKET:Ljava/lang/String; = "paid" -
So my girlfriend was Gavin wifi problems and she calls me to fix it with vague description of what's happening (not even enough to google).
"But I'm a programmer?"
"And?"
"That's networking, they're quite different"
"It's computer stuff it can't be that different"8 -
What's the point of testing if the tester just tests the scenarios which developer gives. Isn't it obvious that only those scenarios will work.2
-
A great corporate culture, pleasant coworkers, a caring manager, meaningful work, and a good salary. Hmmm. Thank you for reminding me that I have a pretty close to ideal Dev job. I can live with what's missing. 🤠
-
Taking charge of an existing project...
Me: "This certificate requires a password. Can you send it to me"
Other dev who was earlier responsible for the project : "Just use the default one"
Me: " And what's that?"
Other dev: "CHANGEIT"! All caps
Me: 😐 -
What's the point of retro if nothing that we're saying should improve is actively being improved and problems being highlighted is constantly being shoved under the rug?8
-
Code review?......... what's that?
Joke apart, We literally don't do that in my workplace, only few people care about code quality and what they are pushing to production2 -
that moment when you solve a big problem, but only you know what's exactly the problem and how important to solve it.
yeah I am a hero 😎1 -
What's the point in using Gentoo? I understand that everything is built from source, but what's the purpose of that?7
-
Xcode's taking an eternity to just archive a build. And what's worse is that the whole system turns sluggish, can't do anything else while archiving.4
-
One of my old company's customer seriously asked the support what's the difference between ">=" and "="...
Support should have answered that one is faster than the other :D
But life must be hard enough anyway...1 -
So I got a call earlier today that a letter from the US arrived for me. I can only guess what's in it.1
-
How to find the solution to your problem:
Try to explain it to someone.
Almost every time I explain some weird thing that doesn't work to my friend, I realize what's the cause or have an idea for something to try out..3 -
Question for everyone that has a job:
Does your workplace have a dress code? If so, what's required?21 -
Chasing information for software crash from a user:
Dev: Are you getting warnings when you open the model?
User: Not when I open the model.
Dev: Huh what's weird, normally there's a warning that looks like this when you open it that looks like this *screenshot*
User: Oh, yes I got that warning2 -
What's the very first thing you usually do when you notice your browser tell you that there is no connection?
Be sincerely (+_+)21 -
- study for my final exams
- finish half of my bachelor thesis
- learn Angular for my full-time job
- learn React for my full-time job
- manage to do all of this in less than a month 😬
the rest will come1 -
What are your favorite distros for Linux? I'm new to Linux so I'm just curious on what's out there that you guys use most and what's most convenient for development! Also can I PLEASE get some upvotes I want an avatar so bad lol8
-
Privacy peeps, what's your opinion on usage of surveillance for national defence, domestic security, etc. ?
I'm just curious, most privacy-minded people I know generally trip up when confronted with stuff like "yeah, but if surveillance was a thing then that blast which killed 20 people yesterday could have been averted."
I've heard quite a few opinions on both sides, what's yours?18 -
People who have personal experience,
What's the best place to do micro-jobs for like $10-$50 that I can do as a freelancer in like an hour? Is Fiverr a good place?11 -
A lot of people on here might benefit from seeing a therapist for their own sake, but then again the content quality would suffer massively, so what's the fun in that?
-
Apparently Patreon has fired (and then outsourced) the entire cyber security team. What's the worst that could happen?
https://thehackernews.com/2022/09/...4 -
I think this might be a record...
My sister asks me what's this, I come over, she shows me a random website she found and starts asking me what she can do on that website...
Fucking kill me now...1 -
I'm curious, what kinds of projects is devRant working on right now? What's your most recent project, personal or interesting, that you've picked up recently?
Mine is a program that automates schoolwork for you.34 -
The other day we were discussing a study that says Python is the best language to start learning code. What's your opinion on the subject?22
-
Does anyone have experience in turning a website idea into a working business? I had a website idea so me and friend decided to make it happen. So far the development is going well, but we don't really know what's next after we're done. Does anyone know any resources regarding what's next? However to reach audience, investors and staff like that?11
-
What's That dread & shameful feeling when you get praised for some shit you know is awful called..?1
-
Translation:
"According to Xiaomi, the U-Disk (Xiaomi's new USB drive) has UDP technology that prevents damage by splashing and dust."
HOW A TRANSPORT PROTOCOL CAN'T PREVENT THAT?
What's next? "The new notebook has HTTP technology that makes it waterproof."7 -
Y'know what's the worst part about all the internet censorship and cyber surveillance? The fact that no one notices it11
-
Take me into the organization as a dev
tell me that I'm supposed to bring ideas and tell you how to improve and what's required
I do that
You ignore me
You expect ultra performance and good profits
GO FUCK YOURSELF7 -
What's the button you maybe see every day, but never press?
Google's "I'm feeling lucky" instead of search 🙈 When did you honestly press that button last time?7 -
Do you all look for code complexity O(n) while coding? Or you make sure that your code runs and never look back what's happening ?
Because as per code review no one looks for code complexity and that's so sad11 -
Hey guys, have a question. I have seen some colourful ++ on the right side of the total number of ++ the user has, and some others just have the total number of ++ what's that?6
-
Email from client: "help! I'm updating my content but it's not showing up on the website! What's wrong?"
A couple of emails back and forth and decide it would be easier to go find out what's up in person, seeing how she's in the same building but downstairs.
"So what's the problem?" I ask
"Oh I figured it out myself. I remembered when you gave me the training that there's two steps to the process but forgot the second one"
"Second one?" I ask (you click update and voila)
"Yeah I forgot after you click update you have to refresh the page, thanks for coming down to help though"
Me: 😑😑😑😑2 -
Kotlin shortcut things a lot it gave me headache when I'm trying to figure out what's happening but I don't know why I still love that language2
-
"hey, how's the GDPR/'right to be forgotten' functionality going?"
"I think dev1 basically completed it before he quit... But it's been 2 months so I'm not sure."
"Well... What's the worst that could happen."9 -
- Ok so today you're going to install MS SQL Server 2014, import this database, and make it show up through a crossed dynamic table.
- Excuse me sir, can I commit suicide now or should I wait a little bit more? -
How low ($) is too low if u don't have a degree? Cause I got a pay decrease and that was cited as the reason. Even after I told the boss on numerous occasions that Im still in school.
What's the lowest you would take?27 -
Contrary to popular belief, after having been in the working world I've realized that what matters and what is of value is book knowledge, not experience.
I find 'experience' an overglorified waste of time. Having in-depth knowledge of everything is what's important.15 -
What's worse than WordPress? WordPress + WooCommerce! What's worse than WordPress + WooCommerce? WordPress + WooCommerce + PayPal! What other more shitty software could we possibly add? Some malicious virus hidden somewhere in the millions of free WordPress plugins most of which are not even full open-source? Who can possibly review and maintain that rummage table of outdated crap code?13
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I don't know what's wrong with me..
Within one day I basically lost interest in everything I do. I just don't see the point of all this anymore.
And the bad thing is, that I don't even know where that comes from so suddenly, everything is going fine, but still.. Life just feels like pain at the moment.
Don't want do drag down someone else with me and I sincerely apologise if it's too late to mention it at this point, just hope that maybe someone here can understand what's going on or give me some advice on how to fix my situation.7 -
Dear everyone,
Stop turning off the monitors. That doesn't sign you out or turn off the computer, it just makes the next person wonder what's taking so long.1 -
Oh what's that? You merged trunk into RC the day before the release? Nice one.
Now go roll it back and think about what you've done.1 -
What's so damn hard about a simple change log when you update your app? Or at least point me to somewhere where I can see that. Ugh. Come on.6
-
What's your take on developing web with python (using Django for example)?
Coming from PHP, Symfony , etc, my first impressions are that it's clunky and very backend oriented.15 -
What's the worst thing that happened to you today?! 🥲 😕
For me, it is, accidentally putting my node_modules folder into antivirus for scanning!! 😭 😩
I don't know whether I can use my antivirus ever again ... 🥺 😞9 -
What's more better than diving in for a REST after an entire day of SOAPing? I'm happy I'm getting no REACTions after all that time being NODE.1
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Had to work with a SOAP API that was described by its WSDL to have a property called "ShoppingCart". Wasted two days trying to figure out what's wrong. The customer sent a screenshot of their backends input mask. It was then that I noticed that the corresponding label read "ShopppingCart". Yes, that's what the property was actually named.1
-
git commit -m "Now we have a not a true scatter scatter chart"
I mean, what's the worst that can happen, my commits are very informative. -
What's worse than a StackOverflow question with no answers? An open GitHub issue, no comments in the last three months, and a sense that you just hit the ultimate bug the vendor will never fix.
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I am so annoyed with Clickbait "News", that I instantly block every news site in my feed with them at this point. It's SHOCKING what's HAPPPENS next, go to the comments to find out more!9
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You know what's hard...
Fixing a bug which occurred in production without having any logs because you log that useful info at debug level. 😧
Now take pen and paper, do calculation on your own and speculate what would have happened in production.3 -
Build pipelines are awesome. What's not awesome is forgetting the 'pipeline' bit.
Sure, let's have each TeamCity job in the 'pipeline' build the deployable from different places! You must manually merge your code from dev to test to release.
What's that? The functionality working in dev isn't there in production? I wonder how that happened. -
You know what's better than a Bucket Object that wraps an arraylist?
A BucketBucket Object which wraps an array of buckets which each wraps an ArrayList.
FML1 -
I am so fed up with life that I just want to die...
But on the other hand, I'm not sure what's going to happen, when I'm dead either.7 -
What Git client are you using? Also, what's a freemium Git client that is cheap? Sorry I'm not a fan of monthly subscriptions (hi gitkraken and Git tower) Thanks! 😎23
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What's your favorite vps hoster?
I'm currently using scaleway and love it, but recently learned that they offer no protection against data loss.
So I'm looking for an alternative for a project in production that has automatic backups as well as unmetered bandwidth.7 -
That feeling when the recently hired senior developer doesn't know even the simplest things. "A terminal, huh, what's that?"2
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Sat down, wrote 2 hours worth of code and it didn't have any bugs when I deployed... what's this that I'm feeling?2
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VS never ceases to amaze me.
What's the point of a FUCKING IDE that
suggests compilation errors with its autocomplete?
What's the fucking point!?
CommandTimeout is an int, not a TimeSpan.
I want autocomplete to HELP ME, not to waste my time with irrelevant noise based on on some AI bullshit.
I want to know who are the motherfuckers who thought this was a good idea. I fucking hate them.
Does someone know how to disable this shit? I disabled everything in Options->Intellicode, but that shit keeps popping up.
Visual Studio 2022, btw6 -
What's that? You committed the tmp/dist/cache field for something only YOU run locally and asked me to review it. Just GET OUT.1
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What's the best natural language processing software that won't f you up?
I'm a big fan of Alexa's capabilities but we all know that Alexa is to security what North Korea is to democracy.
Is there any software that can compete with powerhouses that are Alexa, Google home, Siri or cortana?4 -
When you convince your client to purchase a commercial thread-dump analysis tool, and that pies of soft gives you flamegraphs like this one [excerpt].
And then your own TD analysis tool works significantly better than that.
[P.S. I wonder how many of you will spot what's wrong here :) ]5 -
It's so frustrating, how people don't want to pay well for services and all, but what's more frustrating is that I don't even know how much to ask for most times! 😥
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my manager pings me to get info on stuff he's coordinating with others.
such as, it this possible to do? what's the estimate? what's the flow?
and then he pawns it off as his own input.
and when the information flows back to me, I hear folks saying that he came with this idea/estimate.
maybe it's a typical manager thing to use engineer's input as their own grasp/knowledge of the project. at least they should extend the courtesy of acknowledgement.7 -
dealing with a crippling realization that my depressed brain is a pale shadow of former myself before bipolar, but getting lost in a contradiction posed by the fact that I have more experience and clearer vision now, not being able to decide what's better and who I'd rather be2
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me: *Taking Applied Statistics with R in the Math Department in my college*
classmates: "Did you get what's going on in that class?"
me: *never took statistics* Well I can get the programs to run, but I have no idea what they're telling me"
classmates: "I might get what's going on... if I could get the code to work."
me: "Well we're both doing great, then"1 -
Just got a letter telling me I need to pay my own health insurance as a student. What's that, you want all my money? Fml4
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Viruses are little monsters that eat your computer away (or what's left from it) after it's dead. They start with the heart (BIOS) and then go to the CMOS chip.2
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What's the smallest size start-up company you would work for? The American dream, of course, is to own your own company. If that option were off the table, would you work as a developer for a startup company that only had 3 other employees, including the CEO?4
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Calling myself a hacker for reading messages in SharedPreferences, to avoid seen.
What's something you do that makes you feel like a hacker?4 -
Family? What's that? 🤔
If anything they made me go to my room/corner because I couldn't stand them and I was always on the PC because I could distract myself from the local environment. 😢1 -
For some weeks now I've been having strange compilation issues with Android Studio on Windows 10. Some of my builds fail with funny errors that have only 1-3 StackOverflow entries. When I switch to Linux (Pop!OS) it complies without errors apk gets installed on device. At some point I was frustrated where I spent a whole day trying to figure what's wrong only at night to code using Linux and it compiled. What's up with Android Dev on Windows?3
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Ugh.. what's the point of a design document if you don't want me to follow it and just want me to build features you want and that the client mentioned nothing about.
and yet you wonder why we are over budget. -
You've developed APIs. And they're working locally.
What's the issue in giving that to the front-end team to consume them ?? ( Said in angry raised pitch )
Somebody please let that dumbfu manager know that the codebase needs to be DEPLOYED on a server somewhere. Without that, you just can't magically build code from codebase and give it to people like code fairy !2 -
Strange things happening in my phone since a couple of weeks.
Google now automatically starts.
Music Player automatically starts.
All of sudden camera app opens.
Tried permission, removed all apps that were not installed from playstore..
What's next now?10 -
What's your interesting and useful web dev blog that you have subscribed?
I don't like news blog. Prefer an individual developer's or a company's blog where they share their experience, tips, random stuff etc.4 -
I can't find a website I used years ago... maybe someone here remembers its name.
It was a place with daily code challenges, real time code battles, you had to fix bugs, syntax errors, you could choose different programming languages, and receive points based on the number of chars used to fix the issue, etc.
I hope it still exsits, it was really fun.
Thanks in advance!5 -
I know we are supossed to complete tasks fast.
But god I hate it when they ask for a "simple fix" that they have no fucking clue how to even begin to do. Clients obviously don't have to know this, but my boss can't code an if statement yet feels as though he can say what's easy and what's not and how long it'll take.1 -
What's the software/hardware/plugins that has become integrated part of your working structure?
Stuff that immediately gets includes on any machine you use and can't imagine working w/o?5 -
So this manager told me we need to build accelerator. What's an accelerator. He told that it some how manages Microservices.2
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token auth woes
I am fed up of doing shitty token authentications that don't refresh and are database dependent. what's the good way to do token auth for rest APIs? json-web-token?3 -
What's the best-supported Linix distro to install for AMD Threadripper?
I know that upstream Kernel 4.15 has support for it, so that narrows it down a bit to the more bleeding-edge options or rolling distributions like Arch. I wonder if others have experience with that.6 -
Tired of imperative different-yet-all-the-same programing languages. What's the most awesome funcional language ever?
Bonus: sweet projects you've done in that language9 -
What's your favorite bug you've ever created? Here's one that took a few hours from my life:
if (errCode);
printf("Something bad happened!");
It keeps failing, and yet it all seems like it's working!!!!1 -
Serious biased question:
What's the newschool way of storing passwords now that everyone is against the known hashes?
Would prefer storing it in a good 'ol database tho pls.12 -
Hey, uh. What's the status on that seafaring devrant ball?
The project kinda just disappeared out of thin air.3 -
What's your favourite under appreciated programming language?
By that, I mean a programming language that isn't widely used but deserves more recognition?
I'll leave the exact definitions for you 🙂12 -
YouTube first what's it's about or get information about the tech. Next, look for free tutorials on YouTube.
When working on the tech, use Google to look to bug-fix or code that some might have already written. -
The new AWS CodeCommit console is SOOOOOO SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW holy shit.
Multiple seconds to update the page each time you change folder before you can see what's inside.
Who the hell thought shiping that to prod would be a good idea?2 -
What's the best Linux distribution for servers? I don't want an UI and that fancy stuff. I just want a 1337 hax0r console.10
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Alright! What's this hype on another X language/framework. Let me just jump right in because that will make me a cool kid.2
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[thinking] "Just a few little tweaks and I'm all set to meet the deadline. Oh, what's this? Not broken but I could probably improve that real quick."
[Several hours passed deadline]
"Oh God, what have I got myself into?"1 -
Freelancers, what's it like?
Would you recommend it?
What stacks are must have?
What's maintenance like?
What's dealing with hosting like?
Is it mostly webdev? Is there any market for anything else really?
I'm thinking about going that direction. I've been burned by one company too many. I don't know how I can trust a company again. I also that if I have to really manually earn every last cent, might be the best way to make myself care about my work
I'm thinking about it8 -
What's the deal with Pawn Stars? Is American culture so commercialized that people are really entertained by overly dramatic haggling?2
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How do you name your servers? or what's you'r company using?
Currently im using <abbreviation><sequence>, But i'm noticing that this does not really scale well.6 -
I'm fairly new to linux and wanted to ask what's the best linux distro(?) to have for web development that can dual boot with Windows (can't really remove windows since there's some applications I need there RIP...)12
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hey there, what's that attitude saying "Yeah I didn't try my best, but still this is all I can do" to your manager and still get a heavy paycheck?3
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Meetings, meetings and more meetings ....... what's that, you want me in another meeting that could have been an email !!
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So all my code is Lambda serverless funcs, hurray!
But I still need NAT gateway / VPC endpoints that cost $50pm to reach S3 from private VPC so what's the fucking point?!1 -
"Feature X is not complete"
"We regressed in Y"
Well, if you tell me WHAT'S WRONG and how it SHOULD be I'll be able to do things that are truly complete!1 -
Been using Yahoo's mail app and I'm pretty impressed with it. Finally a mail app that doesn't require you to turn on the Sync switch for it to work. What's your default mail app and why?15
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What's the one non-tech thing that you feel 95% of people disagree with you on? Mine is: I think that piercings and tattoos are ugly. What's yours?10
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Lead told me to design a database.
When finished asks me to take a look at the old, poorly designed database and make changes to the new one.
I mean, what's the point in that?5 -
What's your go to commit message for a large group of changes that encompasses a variety of features?
Mine is "Major Improvement"17 -
Do you ever enrolled online dev courses on udemy or platforms like that?
What's your opinion about these courses?
I want to learn Angular, I bought a course on udemy but i don't know if they're useful or not8 -
Hey devs What's up ?
Let me ask u a thing that could have happened in ur life ....
U ppl might have suffered from eye strain and are not able to see PC screen further .
What u ppl do in this case ????
Plzz help .17 -
Okay, what's the stupidest idea for a project?
I'm talking projects that you'll do only to show off that you can! With disregarding the "why" part.
I'm talking the 'connecting to the coffee machine and making coffee through the ssh connection' project, or creating a vim plugin that orders pizza.
Just how crazy can we get?1 -
What's your opinion on Ruby on Rails vs Java?
I'm honestly leaning towards Java for no other reason than look of the code and the fact that it's what my school teaches for comp sci.7 -
What's an "old language" that has had significant momentum, but has also had its day and really needs to just go away now and be replaced by something else? FORTRAN? COBOL? BASIC? Any others?12
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What's your favorite open source Python IDE? I'm looking for something relatively simple. I'm uaing Komodo Edit, but it doesn't seem to do the trick for providing information about modules that have been imported, it tries, but it isn't reliable.4
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!rant
My favorite thing about the new web overhaul is that individual rants don't get truncated in feed view. What's yours? -
How about "it's not your business to know that as long as they deliver what's necessary"?
That whole tracking and screenshot software movement for remote work is so vile, main reason I work at fixed rates where I just add a percentage of space on top and then do new contracts if they exceed that.10 -
Calls phone company to ask what's wrong with the internet connection.
Customer Service: Please turn off your modem, wait 10 seconds then turn it on again.
Me: Do you honestly think I didn't do that a hundred times already? -
I wonder if it's possible to negotiate amendments that forbid your employer to make you work with specific technologies.
"You're a modern dev shop aren't you? What's the harm in adding a clause to the contract that explicitly states I, the employee, will not be made to work with php5?"1 -
What's up with people being super cutthroat about best coding practices? In my experience it's not very well focused on in schools or especially for self taught devs, so what's with the critical attitude towards bad formatting or indenting, or perhaps less than par code organization? I get it's suboptimal but if someone doesn't know that it's wrong then what's with the fire and brimstone response? Not personal, just something I picked up on.3
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What's your worst case of documentation examples that only cover the most basic of use cases, along with API docs that just repeat the name of the functions with some punctuation... angular js unit testing docs for me1
-
one night I posted " function smoking() * at my office conversation group and everyone stated asking what's that?
And I replied ahh nothing I'm just high, ignore it.
I was dreaming1 -
!rant
So just saw a video about the surface go, now as someone who firmly hates Microsoft and especially windows, this has me almost tempted at that sort of price... What's your guys opinion on it?5 -
What's the most paralelized end user application you came across? I mean not that obvious things like gimp or photoshop, maybe things you experienced are just more speedy because they actually use the 8 to 16 threads of a modern CPU in full?1
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Here's a question that I still don't know how to respond.
What's the expected salary of a front end developer?
In euros please.6 -
That thing, when you hear "the server room is dead, no-one can work today" across the office...
What? What's a server room? It's 2018. No cloud? :face_palm::skin-tone-4:
**[realises may have made a mistake in taking the job]**
#20126 -
You know what's new among my team?
The one that put semi colon and the one doesnt. (Yes javascript)1 -
What's the most insane deployment scheme you've had to work with? One client has a release schedule that deploys all major projects once a month(!). Bugfixes get deployed once a day (systemwide), so any issue that can't be verified until it's in production has at least a days delay when iterating.
-
Fuck Ubuntu and it's caching. What's that? Oh you have 180 Gigs of free space? Let me take care of that for you in a few minutes. Say goodbye to your next boot and good luck figuring that shit out.5
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Seriously, what's with the naming ordeal?
We start with userInput, then spiral into userInputUpdatedFinalV2
Are we writing code or crafting spell incantations? camelCase, snake_case, kebab-case, PascalCase – it's a syntax battleground.
Can we have names that make sense, for sanity's sake?3 -
Have so many hats squeezed on that i think my blood supply has been cut off from my ... uh what's that called... you know, cpu's but for humans. Something with a b ...
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When other people sleep, I work, when other people work, I sleep. Best social life. Just work and sleep.
-
What's your best hacky bodge that actually worked? Mine was probably adding an item in a list to iterate off when searching for matching accounts or else it crashed. Love you node.js.
-
What's worse?
1. Toxic workplace but great boss or
2. Toxic boss but great workplace or
3. Toxic parents but great workplace and boss
Confession I've had all 3 for a long time at different times. Just that 3rd is permanent.🤷♂️8 -
What's the one movie/TV show that always gets you in a geeky project mood.
Like, makes you want to build, code or at least desire to create something?5 -
What's best about being a dev?
that most of our work is done by the skillful use of google and we still seem like geniuses to "ordinary" folks.
Therefore to answer the question: http://lmgtfy.com//... -
What's the point of a 'Check for new version' menu if it doesn't tell you that a new version is out, and that you have to manually fetch it and install it?3
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To you, what's the best way to notice that user failed to log in/complete a form ? Alert, fading text, animation ? I'm talking about design7
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Which encryption library do you people use with c/c++? I'm trying to use openssl but well there is more documentation about how to replace my own heart in the dark than on that. Also most of the structs have missing declarations hell yeah its nice to have a EVP_PKEY but what's that? Oh I know it's a evp_pkey_t and what's that? Nothing apparently. Comments? You kidding??? A proper library doesn't have them...3
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Do apis and libraries or any kind of abstraction makes developers less aware about what's going on in the inside. I think it makes freshers ignorant about inside workings.
I think that every one who's trying to learn should start from core stuff only. But that also leads to them getting away from coding coz its too difficult.
What's your view?2 -
What's a good way to learn proper testing? I'll be starting in a position before long that uses JUnit, karma, mocha, etc.1
-
Hey guys what's a good external compact keyboard that is soft to press and quiet to type? Mac layout also. Thanks2
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What's up everybody 🤙 ? How is it going ? I wanted to help you chill out so I coded a voice assistant named 'Tyrone' that does stuff.
🚀 Go 🚀 and enjoy it live at https://tilakmaddy.github.io/my-voi...
Until then, ✌️ !6 -
What's your current Desktop or Laptop specifications that you use for work and what's your job title?10
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What's generally considered the best (in terms of cost and compatibility) phone to flash a custom rom to? My current one is filled with bloatware that I can't uninstall and the bootloader is locked.5
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I don't know if it's the lack of knowledge or just always being distracted, I try to debug and after wasting half an hour I realize the problem is that I forgot to call the function. Every time! What's wrong with me?
-
In your opinion, what's worse?
Finding someone's attached a RAT to that new Open Source game you want to play with, or a rat party in your roof because you're too busy judging and re-writing said game?4 -
I've spent two days of holiday to setup CircleCI. And I can't **believe** how hard they make such an essential service. I've uploaded 16 commits to Github just to fix the configuration. And what's the best part? It still doesn't work! The configuration reference is useless.
*looks at CircleCI*
Oh what's that? They're having a system slowdown? well, GOOD FOR ME... /s -
!rant
Recommend some interesting/innovative VR games that may be harder to come by? I want to get an idea of what's out there.
Platform doesn't matter (I can access any). -
How do you deal with technical interviews that are not in your native language?
I speak English fairly well. But when you are in pressure or want to explain of course I feel that urge to switch to native and explain concepts.
What's your trick ?3 -
For the people experienced with Stripe and C#, given that I'm in a Server+WebAssembly context, what's your experience setting up the payments?
What would look like the flow of actions to pursue a charge? -
Which syntax is "correct" TypeScript syntax ?. I prefer the first one. But what's about guidelines ?
Note for UpperCase variables: yes I know. We use that syntax to differentiate public and private variables. (Yes I know that doesn’t exist in JavaScript)8 -
What's that about Tornado and flood? Of a warning you say? Oh good I thought you were gonna say we had errors.
-
What's your opinion on the fact that some companies take the live coding round of the interview on Google docs?2
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I got word that the Oracle Java certification exam is pretty cheap to take for the next four weeks ($25 as opposed to almost ten times that). What's the chance that a junior dev working currently with Java (aka me) can learn enough from the official Java certification course in the evenings until then and pass the exam?4
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What's the name of that protocol that federated social media software implements? ActivityPub? well, what ever the name is I know it does not implement any concept for fitness specific social updates (like this app Hevy does)
-
What's harder than trying to name a variable is to think of a memorable but easy to type password to a system that resets expires every 3 months with history checks.2
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What's the correct way to do an iterator in a for loop?
Some teachers tells me that every iterator be named like line and row and other says i and j are the convention and you should name your iterator like that.8