A little bit of Lua in my life
A little bit of Java by my side
A little bit JS is all i need
A little bit of bash is what i see
A little bit of JSON in the sun
A little bit of Python all night long
A little bit of TCL here i am
A little bit of this makes me your dev

>Building advertising platform
>Life is good
>Fire up the dev server and open in browser
>No assets
>What the fuck
>Check code and config for like an hour it's all good
>What the fuck
>Try incognito browser, it works.
>What the fuck
>Oh yeah. Adblock. Fuck.

She - So. Do you read ?

Me - Yes. Infact a lot. Daily. My life is filled with it.

She - Wow. Nice. So what do you read mostly ? Which one is your favourite

Me - Mostly Documentations. Vuejs documentation is my favourite followed by express and mongodb documentation. And yeah webpack. You should read them too. Then there is a book on ES6, 'Understanding ES6' by Nikolas S Zakas, famous author and programmer. Great stuff

Had a PR blocked yesterday. Oh god, have I introduced a memory leak? Have I not added unit tests? Is there a bug? What horrible thing have I unknowingly done?

... added comments to some code.

Yep apparently “our code needs to be readable without comments, please remove them”.

Time to move on, no signs of intelligent life here.

Me typing
git rebase --help
GF: What!? Oh... nevermind it says rebase. I thought it said rebae.
Me: What?
GF: I'm the only bae you need in your life!
Me: ... This is going on devrant.

Me : You should try this app, its great!
Friend: What is about?
Me : A place where programmers and developers tell jokes and complain to each other
Friend : But you can do that i real life too
Me : But now you don't have to leave your computer to do that

Life is like an npm install

You never know what you are gonna get.

The network starts slowing down, transactions start to fail across the 450+ stores, the website starts to spit 500 errors what is going on?

Queue a frantic running around the office working out what was going wrong... Calls from all 3 data centres, nothing is going in or out of the network.

Notice the network admin come back to his desk, his eyebrows raise and he looks left and right before unplugging his laptop ethernet from one of the server access points

The network rushes back to life, everything is fine.

That particular network mapping tool is now banned for use on production.

CIO: what kind of web server do you want for your dev environment? WordPress?
Me: Uhm, Linux centos running apa-
CIO: whoa that's dangerous you need to think of the people who are going to support this.
Me: right...
CIO: we're going to pick something and stick with it.

FML company is just starting to do in house dev. CIO is heavily involved and knows more than I do... My life is a Dilbert comic strip

On a french TV show:
Animator: So Jean-Pierre what do you do in life?
Jean-Pierre: well, I'm a computer ingineer
A: Oh, so you're the guy we call when the printer is fucked?
JP: Absolutely not, I'm the one who make programs and softwares that don't work, so they call us again

Literally me 😂

Question: What is your inspiration in life.

Answer: That these guys fuck up more than I can ever in this life.

My mother.

She explained to me what “algorithm“ is. I was 14. Instant love for the domain. In 2 days, I knew exactly what I want to do with my life

What an I doing with my life? What's the meaning of all the efforts? What if I'll make a perfect own project?..

Oh, great, IDE is finally booted on!

What is life?

What is Automation?

Option 1 : Make life easier
Option 2 : Make others jobless
Option 3 : Make yourself jobless

Everything is nothing.

Hey @dfox and @trogus, was wondering, are there any plans for items higher than 20K upvotes? I'm at more than 120K now and I'd like a new item and also maybe something to work towards :)

Also, I'm just asking/wondering, I know what a busy life is. This is nothing more than a question, not demanding anything! (I'm deffo not in the position to demand anything)

Thanks!

So there is this thing @ the office that everyone has to bake 50 pancakes once.

Its 2 am, i just got done, i cant cook to save my life.

Guess what.

Its 49.

So, my wife is in the hospital with two of the kids for an annual checkup. Should be nothing to worry about but still it's stressful and I want to be there.

I'd booked the day off (until the end of the week) and last week I got told, you've taken too many holidays, just the Friday is approved.

Ok, fine, I'll do some extra hours work from home and be there for the appointment. But fuck no, they schedule an "important" client meeting this morning and I'm required to attend.

TWO FUCKING HOURS and I contributed a sum total of 2 sentences which could have been filled in just as well by the other developer on the call

Just another reason I'm happy to be interviewing at other companies.

My favorite part of being a developer is that no matter what craziness is going on in my life I can put on my headphones and lose myself in logical problem solving.

Goddamit Apple fanboys... I saw 5 tents infront of the Apple Store in Zürich switzerland today, I MEAN WTF ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE? SPENDING AT LEAST 1000 CHF (around the Same in USD) FOR A FUCKING PHONE WHICH IS FROM APPLE!? WTF?! WHY? WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF ALL THIS NONSENSE?! EXPLAIN THIS BULLFUCK TO ME!!

What was the biggest lies you heard about programming or programmers life.

Mine was: “programming is easy and high paying job.”
No it is not.

Everyday, my developer friend keep complaining and talking our manager bad words behind him. So i introduced devRant to him.

Him: what is this?
Me: An app specially designed for developers for sharing their programming life.
Him: *after installed* , how can i add ur account?
Me: you cant add me, bcx everyone don't know each other here. *walk away and continue do coding*

After few days, i realized he always staring at his phone, guess what? Lol

HOW IS IT AUGUST 1 RIGHT NOW

2019 ENDS SOON BUT IT STARTED LIKE YESTERDAY

WHAT IS HAPPENI

WHY IS TIME GETTING FASTER THE OLDER YOU GET?

JUST FCK OFF THIS IS NOT NORMAL

I GOTTA HURRY TF UP AND DO SOME SHIT WITH MY LIFE BEFORE TIME RUNS OUT☠️☠️☠️💨💨🌬

thanks to @stuxnet i have to proudly say, that i have went outside and after 21 years, asked a girl for her number in real life, of course got rejected, this probably sounds pathetic as fuck to all of you, which i do agree, but because of the hell I've gone through and blood I've left behind out of struggle the life caused me, i have finally gathered bravery to take a risk and do it, yes i technically haven't achieved anything but i have finally tried at least once and this is the furthest I've gone with girls in real life... what a fucking relief... i think its gonna be much easier now that i finally broke the ice...

This is what I've been saying all my life but tech recruiters just don't get it....

Life of Boris, a youtube chanel of a slav guy that makes random stuff (and some delicious russian recipes 😋) uploaded this video few hours ago.

I watched it, and I didn’t expect the video to be an actual Python tutorial 😂 I loved it!

What do you think?

P.D. I hope this is not necessary, but I remind you that Life of Boris is not a programming channel, please don’t be too strict, it’s just entretainment

I think having the wrong job can really bring down the quality of life.

My friend has to drive two hours each way to get to and from work. That's four hours wasted commuting.. and his job is service desk agent.
What are the consequences, you ask? He never has a spare second to talk to me, he's quickly developing gray hairs and he has no time awareness.

Having the wrong job is unhealthy and results in a cascade of bad side effects.. When most of your day involves work-related things, that's just wrong. There is no Yin-Yang there. I know because my work life is somewhat balanced.

1. When you are inexperienced, probably you’ll need to accept any job.
2. Learn and discover what you prefer to working on.
3. Become an expert on you desired field.
4. You can choose where you would like to work.
Remember friends: Life is to short to work for an asshole.

Met a girl on internet ( because I don't have a real life )
She: So what are you studying?

Me: Currently learning about Deep Learning but I also do freelancing in website development to pay my bills.

She: Okay so tell me what is a COMPUTER

Me: ....
She: ......

Me: umm... it's a... mmm.... actually it's a..... basically a.....
(thinking really hard)

*30 seconds later*
Me: It's an electronic machine

She: seriously? I expected much better from you

Me: I'm sorry!

Just broke up with my girlfriend and it feels AWESOME! Like I’m free now! I finally can do what I like to!

Finally! To live without regrets and fears of not being able to entertain someone. It’s finally my thoughts, my music, MY life. My fucking life. Just me as is and it’s awesome. Finally, after three years of suffering.

FUCK YOU

*Working on android app life is good, but iMac suddenly became slow*
Me: Wonder what I have open
*After checking and found only Android studio and FF Developer edition*
*Checks RAM: 654MB remaining*
*Closes Android Studio*
RAM: 4.83GB remaining

T_T

Today I uttered words I thought I'd never say in my life....

"This is why linux is better"

What the hell is going on in 2020 lmao

I did it! My Senior Project is done! Seven months of my life have been spent leading up to the completion of my game engine and it's finally over. It is awful and should never actually be used by anyone, but it's done and that's all that matters.

And as my final middle finger to my school's administration, somebody has to grade a binder comprised of nearly 200 pages. That's what they get for not listening to me when I told them that it was a huge project and adding more to it. Dear administration, f*** you for making my life more stressful than it needed to be.

When you been debugging over 3 hours and wonder... "What the fuck is wrong with my life"

when you work for a place that has plain text passwords in the db. lol
I asked head of department if he knew what salting/hashing passwords was and he said no.... is this real life?

When the last dev wrote code and you dared to read it....switch on a Boolean, what even is your life legacy dev?

What is this "Social Life" you speak of? Is it another JavaScript framework? 🤔

When a programmer is in love,
He doesn't care about the UI, but cares about the algorithm and functionality.

In real life, he care about what is inside, not the physical appearance. :)

Hey guys. I'm very proud to present my first book. Artificial Intelligence. A book that speak about convolutional neural network from the scratch and how artificial Intelligence improve our life. It's not a technical volume only but a place to know what there is inside. Now is time to correct it...

How does programming influence a programmers daily life?

1. We start counting from zero.

2. We observe software more than using it. What is the algorithm behind it? Which Data structure is used?

3. Greeting people with "hello world".

4. Assigning variables to people.

I started saying 'yes' to every opportunity in life. Long story short, I have 3 websites, 2 logos, a couple of leaflets and 2 non-profit websites due yesterday. Whiskey with cereal never tasted better at 8 AM!

That moment when you finish a project and you think to yourself "What now? Am I still needed? Life is pointless now."

Adobe will end-of-life Flash by 2020, and all big Browsers are joining this by disabling Flash features slowly

Let's make a petition to end-of-life Electron, it is basically Flash for Desktops and it is A RESOURCE-HUNGRY LAZINESS-PROMOTING PIECE OF SHIT THAT SHOULD IMMEDIATELY BE REMOVED FROM THIS VERY PLAnet.. what do you think about that particular idea?

#StopElectron2017smhOkayAtLeastBy2020Please

I feel strange, because I don't have nothing to rant about... I work with awesome people, and my life is not so terrible... What the fuck I'm doing on devRant?

Uhm... maybe I'm the boss who everyone is ranting about...

I just slept from 8 to 6. AM to PM.

My biological clock is gonna be so broken…

Fortune cookie is trying to tell me to enjoy my dinner and step away from work for a little bit.

>Middle of night
>css not getting applied conditionally
>a simple ng-class
>me raging
>fuck angular's digest loop
>fuck dom and not giving parse errors
>fuck my life
>Coworker is also confused
>after 1hr, what it could be
>A typo, ifStudent->isStudent
>😑

27 years old, been in 3 jobs. Hired in a new job. Confidence has went up and down like shit. Life has become more real than ever before.

What have I learned through all these bumpy rides?

Life is journey, it goes up and it goes down. But what you may not realize is that everything that happens to you, is for you to learn.

Happy Friday to everyone in this unknown path, just enjoy that you are alive, can breathe and see things with your magical eyes.

God exists for sure.

Hipsters be like: i aM iN cOnTrOl oF mY oWn LiFe

And then proceed to give away their Calendly link.

Fucking hilarious. They fail to realise that time is the most important entity anyone can have. And they give it away to strangers to control their time.

Imagine, giving access and control of your most important entity of your life to some random stranger on internet.

I coincidently found this. I had to read it three times before I understood what the message was.

I am slowly getting back to my life where I had good work life balance, but this time I am paid well with lots of learning.

I am on my way to become a time millionaire.

It doesn't feel good to be average at everything.

Life is depressing

I can't commit to anything hard enough to become the best.

Programming
Singing
Drawing
Story making
Sports

I'm just average.
I feel bad
I feel like I'm a waste of resources.

I'm tired of ranting.
This life is just tiring.
I don't have the patience

I'm average at commitments.
Time management

I see other people code and sing better than me and feel demotivated

I feel like jumping of a cliff cause no matter what I do, there's someone light years ahead of me.

I'm not even unique
Ultimately that's probably what I want.
To be irreplaceable.

I guess in this struggle to be relevant I'm gonna lose myself and if I do get there, I might not be as happy anyways.

So what's the point to all this

Who am I?
Why Am I here ?
What is purpose of my life ?

finally
error solved

Life is too awesome.

Top 5 biggest questions

1 What is the universe made of?
2 How did life begin?
3 Are we alone in the universe?
4 How to exit vim?
5 Why do we dream?

Fuck, I'm too tired to rant about shit. Life is really starting to go better and I just...don't know what to rant about, so I've been quiet for the past couple months.

Uhhhhh, whenever I close my laptop the screen stays on and seeps through but I'm too lazy to actually mess with it to make it turn off when I close it?

I've been hanging out with my best friend again lately and she's the best fucking person ever?

OH WAIT, I'M BROKE, THERE'S SOMETHING (I've spent like 10 minutes typing, just trying to think of shit to say)! But I'm just bad with managing money and I get paid on Saturday anyways..

Guys. I don't know what to even rant about anymore. Life is finally going good enough that I don't feel the need to rant all the time.

Several hours ago decided to quit my job due to insane manager (more in the upcoming rants) without a new job lined up.

An hour ago I got an interview invite from Uber.

WHAT IS HAPPENING

P.S. Anyone working at Uber? Did you have to do much LeetCode? I’ve done two LC exercises in my entire life. Not sure what to expect.

So I just received an email from a developer, saying my client hired him to take care of their website from now on. This client counted on me since 2012, so I felt a little... Betrayed. Even though this client was not big and a little difficult.

It's weird. I am trying to transition to something better in my professional life, but I'm not feeling confident of what I'm doing. Sometimes I feel my professional life is ruining. Uncertainty sucks.

Additionally, my desktop decided to stop working today and won't turn on. Oh well.

Sometimes I wonder:

Who actually cares?
About what I do
About what I make
About me.

Why put in effort if there is no different result? Why am I always sad? What ruins my day? Is there really hope? Why? So many life questions I want answered. Do I care too much? I definitely think way too much. Why am I so lazy. The questions I have.

Cheers,
To a better day.

What the fuck do you do when you find out your life is a lie?

That feeling you get when you write an automation package on top of selenium and python that at a press of a button runs through an entire User Checkout process 😍

Oh the hours this is going to save me.
Now to see what else I can automate in my day to day life.

Interviewer: Yeah so we're hiring you as the person who would build out and own our client-facing web application and related stack.

Dev: Perfect, that's what I've been doing for the past 10 years, I'm your guy.

Interviewer: GREAT SO WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FORK AND EXEC ON A PROCESS ON A LINUX MACHINE!?!?!?!?

Dev: I don't... know immediately at this moment?

Dev: Sigh

Dev: I hate my life

Dev: Somebody please help me

"Get a job doing what you love, you'll never work a day in your life" they said

What they didn't tell us is that it would lead us to babysitting/troubleshooting continuous deployments at 3 am on a Sunday with a black Irish coffee and a manic look on our faces

I am now officially 23 years old.

So many hours of work invested
So many countless blood spilled
So much sweat made
So many years passed
So many projects worked on

Summed up in 0 successful projects

If someone were to ask me to showcase what I had done in 23 years of my life, I cannot show them something that no longer exists. The projects are dead. I cannot even prove my friends what I had done other than blindly say what I had done. But behind the scenes I worked so much and am completely demotivated by all of the pressure from failure. I have actually never felt so bad on my birthday. 2020 really is the worst year ever. I feel like a failure while life is just exponentially passing by.....

is it just me, or do some people just make life difficult for the fucking sake of making life difficult?

now, lets ignore the lack of sanitised data, lets also ignore the lack of prepared statements, and for the love of god... lets ignore some magic numbers, because I still don't know what they mean yet....

but why! why would you create an array, implode it, smash it into a database query on the fucking fly, instead of just adding the data into the query in the first place.... it's not like you were doing this right to begin with, but this... this is next level!

Holy shit, it just hit me.

I'm an IT engineer who's irl also doing woodworking. And masonry.

Is this a dream life or what

Today my client emailed me and said : "Isn't google and microsoft the same program". What is life anymore?

Me: Ah, just have to finish this one small feature today and this whole massive update is done. Everyone will be off my back, things will calm down. Gonna be great.

Life: hey man, you know what I was thinking? It’s been a really long time since you had one of those vomiting bugs ... you know the gut wrenching, massive headache, can’t do anything but stare at the walls kind of flu’s?

Me: ...... eh I’m ok thanks.

Life: oh buddy you don’t understand ...... RUN!!!

!rant What have you done with my life DevRant? I'm now addicted and can't quit. Meth is softer than this. 😐

What the fuck is this?
I'm so confused...
Where is the Netflix app? Is this real life?
Please help me.

Scrum is terrible. Is there another agile technique that isn't as bad? Like maybe one that will let us do our "scrum" once a week for like an hour? My current project really doesn't lend itself to once a day scrums. Literally my scrum input is "I worked on what I have been working on, and I'm gonna work on it more today. Impediments are literally the same as they always are because my life is no longer my own."

Announcing devRant 2.0! It is time for exciting overhaul, sponsored by our good friends at Tencent, that will bring life back to this amazing platform.
- elegant simplicity of Viber meets excellent minimalism of AWS
- custom avatars for ++ members
- exciting mini-games
- animated stickers
- ChatGPT integration for ++ members
What a time to be alive!

After 2 years in a small company as an all around software developer (started with xamarin for Android/iOS, then Unity, then OpenXML, augmented reality, virtual reality and .Net MVC...yeah all that and lots more) I changed to another company and I'm here 1 month and some days. I am super enthusiastic and I like it here!! They're more specific and professional, exactly what I need at the moment.

What is the problem, you might ask?

I was given some projects, I have done most of the work but now an issue arrived. I did almost everything and now we're waiting for some answers needed before closing the projects. And I get bored. I want to work!! I need to continue the streak! Just give me something and I'll make it happen!! I am boreeed!!

What is wrong with me? Am I buggy or something?

Implemented complex AD tracking system for offline conversions back to ads.

Me: It's done and works and it's based on cookies.

Tech Manager: What if the cookies get deleted all the tracking is gone.......

Me in my head: Stop trying to be clever with the dotdotot ....

Me in real life: Same as Analytics and Adwords .......all that tracking is gone.

FN smart ass.

What language is "Social life"? It sounds very tedious🤔

"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life’s realities. " - Dr. Seuss

So silicon valley ended. And Mr Robot is ending in 4 days. What the fuck am I gonna do with my life then?!

Not a rant, of course, as life is amazing but...

... Here is a rare, beind the scenes look at what happens on the back end of our office.

Wishing you all a brilliant fucking' day from Bulgaria's Black Sea coast...

!rant

But holy shit Ubisoft are pulling the dead out of the ground and breathing new life into things!

First assassin's Creed origins being a perfect return to form and now FARCRY 5, what is happening with the world??

Recently (last 6 month) I am getting a feeling like I don't know what to do in my life. I don't have any short and long term plan for my life. No ambition and no will power to do anything. procrastinating all task and doing them when there is no time.

Recently I was offered equity in my company and I don't know if I want that. I don't have any answer to any question in my life.

Does anyone know what to do?

I hate my life when I can not learn new frameworks before released. This job post is nearly year old. But guess what?

Moving to flamenco when you have been a metal guitarist all your life is.....painful.

I know fingerstyle guitar picking, but shit is 100% not enough.

Now I was not expecting it to NOT be difficult, but certainly not: cry in your room at night considering if you have what it takes difficult.

10/10 Paco De Lucia ys way tf beyond me.

Do you think that "Work From Home" or "Remote Work" tends to reduce the work life boundary for the employees?

What I think is that Managers feel fine pinging employees at any time of the day. And as employees either you get good at ignoring messages or work outside the working hours.

Why everyone is happy about Google clip? It's the single most scary instance of a big brother appliance that exists today. What are they going to do with the data? They say it's save memories of your kid or your dog. There's already something like that. It's called a brain and paying attention to your damn life. I don't want to be saved in your shitty memories just bc you are so insecure about remembering your fuck*ng memories.

I'm sorry for the outburst but that sh*t is solving a problem nobody had and it's getting applauded like those heaven's gate motherf*ckrs that say that life is improved by these shitty beliefs.

>laptop can't handle 3 terminals because cpu is single-core 1.2GHz
>fuck it
stress -c 128 -i 128 -m 16
>second terminal
top
>load average: 272.15, 247.60, 149.80
>CPU is cool after 30 minutes
>how
>picks up laptop from right side
>burned myself
>cpu is on the left under power button, right side has nothing that would get hot???
>takes apart laptop
>second large CPU-like die
wtf.386
>looks up laptop
>floating point/algebraic coprocessor
WHAT

and that was the story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down

what fucking system has a coprocessor after 2002? (My laptop is a 2008 HP something or other)

Not gonna lie I have toxic people in my life and I have caught myself in multiple situations where I behaved differently, did or did not do something just because they were near.

Whenever these people are gone it’s just the most beautiful thing to be able to relax (also in my mind).

It’s crazy what other people do with us and how we can exaggerate all these feelings and emotions. The best thing I can do is to get rid of this toxicity in my life and move on.

Anybody else or is it just me?

Not so much in my work but more my career.
My dad has been a great role model, still is and always will be.

He was an hard working metalworker. He loved his job. It's not a 50k job but he could easily manage his life.

My dad showed me that doing what you love, working with passion, makes your life easier and more fun. You deliver high quality products, because you care.

Since I found out that I love programming, I made it my life goal to do it as my career.

I've never been happier before. After all, I make money with my hobby.

Something I have learnt in the past month:

Never settle for a low salary no matter how good a company sounds (unless it's a really prestige company) if they don't realise your worth and don't care about their employees. Salary is important. You are important. And customers are important. Any company that just values money, income, profit and growth over their customer and employee experience is a huge red flag. If your work life is so stressful that it doesn't let you have a good work/life balance then avoid it. What comes above being a developer is being healthy and I think alot of people don't realise this. It may sound good to work as an engineer for a big platform but if they only value themselves you are just a cheap slave, move on and do something respectable and enjoyable.

Just my life lesson in applying for grad jobs.

This is a very mild rant about character limit saying that there are >0 characters left when writing comments, then refusing to submit.

I'm so fucking infuriated! I almost raised an eyebrow in anger! What the fuck, my life is literally ruined, this bug is making my toilet visits insignificantly worse!

!dev

fucking great, I come to parent's meeting at school, what a waste of fucking time this is.

the cherry on top: a fucking fake einsten quote on my kid's report, the one that says "there are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is."

They say 'code drunk, refactor sober' but they fail to mention the sober refactoring dude won't have a CLUE what the drunk coder was even thinking.

Such is my life.

It has taught me to accept that I am frequently wrong. Not just when faced with code but with people too.

All the years of "It can't possibly be MY code that's wrong" which of course always turns into "Well, I guess it was my code..." Had helped me think critically in relationships, politics, and many other areas of my life.

Programming had actually heavily influenced my behavior and I would say it is largely for the better.

However, one negative effect it has had on me is that I am less of an optimist. Code is very "cause and effect". This means a lot of my life is "no surprises" and "you get what you give"

So I often feel like the most likely outcome is probably just the one that's gonna happen. There are no surprises, no miracles. Life is cause and effect.

Not even 30 yet and I feel like I've reached a point of stagnation in my career. I no longer enjoy writing code. What else is there to do? My life is set up right now so that I must be a software engineer; I don't have much of a choice.

I feel trapped.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK. What is this dude talking about?! What am I doing with my life?!?!
Test what? What do I have to do? I didn't study this. I don't know what this API thing is. My life sucks. My job sucks. I suck. I'm stupid, because apparently knowing who or what this API is is essential for being a normal part of society.
I don't even.. oh someone pls kill me.
(No I don't want a detailed explanation what I have to do - I know this is not google and i wont understand it anyways and my husband will torture me with it in the afternoon. Just some sympathy for a finance person who has to deal with this would be nice)

Although it's still freezing here (0C) finally some nice sunlight... so finally took a moment to take it all in.

Even with all the "problems" and stress I've been feeling the last few weeks, just looking around now, my only thought is "You know what? Life ain't so bad..."

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK LAMBDA CALCULUS IS??!?!?!

I swear to fuck, nothing makes you feel more like an idiot than trying to understand functional programming after living all your life in the oop world.

Fucking meta-functions and alligator games.

Fuck this, I'm going back to my happy little Java world

This is what I have to deal with in my sad sad life

It is now 12pm.... Time to get up... Now what should I do today?

Bachelor's life at 30... Dunno if I should be happy or sad that there's no one nagging me to do stuff...

What life is....

Rust is beautiful. Rust is also extremely difficult to understand. What the fuck are lifetimes?! I’ve never seen this shit before in my life.

What is your favourite dev-tool, you can't live without?

For me it's Git. Rescued my life for several times... 😅

Spent 4 hours trying to figure out why my expressjs application wasn't working in my environment but DevOps loads it just fine. Turns out there's a difference between ^ and ~ on dependency version requirements. I was loading latest versions of nunjucks and NodeJs instead of stable.

What is life.

What the heck COVID!

All the days have been blending together for the past 6 mo! What day of the week is this? Who am I? What's the meaning of life? Have I ever left the house?

Not going outside, getting alienated from my friends, getting somewhat anxious for no good reason...

Its so weird! This eery, suffocating stillness.

Alas! I hope the day comes soon that I may frolic in the multitudes of people!

Had this life not turned out the way it is. Had you not been a dev, what would you imagine you would have been?

I'll go first.. i would probably have been a librarian or a security guard. Someone with lot of time at hand to read.

> Am writing code
> Life is good
> Add debugger keyword
> Script pauses
> Type in var name... Undefined.
> ...What?
> Check out local scope. It's there. What the fuck?
> Add console.log(myVariable)
> Refresh
> Logs variable no problem. Cool.
> Type in my var name
> Undefined

FFFUUUUUUU-

My director has started a new thing. We all have to tell what we did the previous day, what we are planning to do in the current day and if there are any blockers.

Good thing, right?

The only thing is that all these things are already plotted on the sprint board. It’s right fucking there in front of our eyes.

So what do we do? Just reiterate what is already written there. Fuck my productive life.

Ok I will wear my face mask .... But this sound super life threatening what is written.

I just read Jeff Bezos' article on Medium about how the ones at American Media are threatening him of leaking his private pictures.

As I was reading it, I felt, "Man, how low has journalism come to these days. Here is a guy who's worked so hard to build one of the world's biggest companies, and here are the ones at the National Enquirer trying to bring this man down."

To be honest, who gave them the right to indulge in a person's private life? Why do they have to say, "A nude selfie with his wedding ring on?" Maybe, he sent that image to his wife. This makes me wonder, "Is this the way we treat humans?"

Why are we concerned about what a man does in his personal life? What impact does taking down a man in public bring?

Thoughts, please!

What bothers me here in that delicious and excellent community:

Why I am the fucking last person who is able to rant about anything? 🤯

My life as a dev has its ups and downs, but nothing really worth a rant! 🤔

Damn life.
Life is very hard.
Social relationships are very difficult.
I am so lonely.
Not friendship.
Not a girlfriend.
All I have is my laptop.
My only companion is a laptop.
The only person sitting on my feet is my laptop.

Well, I'm a programmer, so what?
What kind of person am I?
What is the purpose of my creation?

Our community on devrant is pretty big and I'm guessing also diverse. I'm trying to find some information about developers in underdeveloped nations - how is your life compared to the rest of the people in your country? Are you happy with your pay? What about startups? Any good startups that stemmed from underdeveloped nations?

My girlfriend comes in and sees me on devrant.

GF: "What is that app? I see you using it all the time. Is it like an endless blog with updates?"
Me: "It's kinda like facebook. But for developers. And you don't have any friends".
GF: "That seems like a sad app"

Credit: i am programmer, i have no life (fb page )

love helping users that can describe their problem and then we have the "other" side of users, the life sucking golems of collective stupidity.

You get "software does not work!" and asks for error message or description of what doesn't work and get same response "it does not work".

After a few rounds in the "what is wrong support circle" it ends with user has changed PC to one were the software is not installed...

"it does not work" no effing shit sherlock you want me to install some IQ with it?

I recently decided to look at some old questions I asked on Stackoverflow as a beginner dev. No wonder nobody answered the questions. They made no sense at all. I have no idea what I was even trying to ask. Thus is the life of a n00b d3v.

Hahaha under the gun lol

Holy. Shit. Tests. I am testing. All week. Nothing but tests. I am one with the spec. You know what I realised today? Tests are a bit like life. Life is just one big spec suite that takes 75 years to run. Except there's no prod environment at the end of the DMT tunnel waiting for our green pass docket to say 'take me Lucifer, you absolute visionary: I'm ready'. We're all just a spec with no application. We're doomed. Nothing matters. I need to lie down

I sit on toilet to take a shit and i started falling asleep! I shit even while i sleep! This is magnificent. Miraculous. Every day its the same shit but more advanced style of shitting. I am becoming very skilled at shitting. I deserve to get fucking paid every time i take a shit. There should be a sport about who can shit more often every day and I'd be the winner. Bullshit floats all around us every day especially from jobs and interviews. It is inevitable to avoid it. Beautiful. And it does make sense. I keep saying life is shit anyways every time some shit happens. And im always right -- life IS shit anyways. The keyword is **anyways**. Because no matter what you do or dont do, life will be shit Anyways. Life is empty and meaningless. Even shit has more meaning than life itself. If meaning is something that is made up then you can't live life at all. If meaning is what you make it then there is no default meaning in the entire existence. All of it is shit. We either exist because God made us and doesnt want to tell us why or we exist by chance of statistical randomness. Hopefully its the first option as its less depressing

Btw terraform is fucking good

Are we at the f*ck holes off corporate life?

Have you all been busting your guts for corporate f*cks?

I'm so bored of corporate life. What else is there?

Or is it my life that has impacted coding? I'm so glad I was born in the right time. I can't even imagine what I would do instead of coding if I had to live in say, the middle ages.

After about 7 hours continuous work in any one day, I’ve kinda had enough and noticed that work beyond this point is usually shit. I stopped trying and think fuck it now. Deadlines are mainly bollocks anyway. My life is a lot better because of it. Don’t do today what you can put off til tomorrow.Who’s with me?

iiiii fffffuckingg hate articles that just explain something

put a piece of code

that piece of code uses X amount of classes/models

they never mention what structure are those models/classes made of

what is inside them

i cant continue following the article because i dont know what is inside them

they just put it in ur face and say Fuck you

no

Fuck YOU

<font size="1000000px;">FUCK</font>

<font size="10000000000000000em;">YYYYYYYOOOKUUUUUUUUUUU</font>

U MOTHFFFFFUCKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

USELESSS ARTICLE

zzzzz

frustratioms

my nerves are torn

broken

disabled

demented

day

in life

obsession

hell

unreal

what is life
q

what are doing

why are doing this

what is the point of living

how long does it take for a man to die

why are some people blessed with luck and some are not

zzzz

u know what is even more frustrating

girls

yes

ohdont get me started on this topic

well i warned u

the path towards abundance lies upon the few; thou who shalt not risk high; shalt always stay thus low

girls also frustrate me bc

i always do every thing nice and im always nice

so i realized

being nice is fake as fuck and doesnt fuckin work

being urself doesn't do a Fckimg tHING

hhh

frustrations

.

breathe

.

in this hardlife

only the strong survive in this world
- tupac shakur

zzzz

so yes bavk where i was saying girls frustrate me because i always do what im supposed to

so

i tried being thou who shalt i am not

guess what mothrfucker

it works when u be a gofdamn fkig low mothfckr a u know a goddmn fkig punk then they respect u and want u

back i fckked up

i turned back to my real me, the nice me

and then they left me

they think being nice = means being weak

FUCCKK YOUU

ssss

zzzf

kindness != weakness

U FCKING WHORES

UNDERSTAND THAT

zzzzz

breathe

i just wanted to have a walk outside and thenit started raining

so i had to stay inside bc of the rain

m

i am very lonely

u know i was very fine when i was lonely at a very young age but now i need a living entity beside me

with me

i fking need

wait i will cuddle my fluffy dog rn maybe i will feel better

br b wait for me ok

i feel better now

fck

i remembered that goddamn girl again

man i feel so heart broken

srsly

i have sunk into the deepest depths of endless depression I think

it doesnt feel nice

it feels very lonely and depressing down here

but i thimk tjat is be because i care too much

some people say i overthink

I dont overthink

i am like the stealth people
the shadow people

i stay quiet and observe

everything

i always know what is happening but i rarely speak about it

and people dont realize

so they think they can fool me

no

everything has its limits

so much lies that im sick of it

i always tell it how it is

i always reward those who help me

i always help those who help me

i never forget those people

zzzZZ

why is it that people who dont give a single fucking Fffffficxkkckck about me

are the ssame people i almost care the MOST?

i cross hundreds and thousands of miles to visit a person, invest hours of my time to do that

i do that....

and they wouldnt even step 1 foot in front to see me....

what kind of life is this

vv

feel like cryin rn

.

zzzzz

.

i dont understand what one must do

what is the point

all i want is to be happy

that is it

but being happy is.... i wanted to say the hardest part of life but now my voice told me being happy is a state of mind

myself answered me that being happy ? is a state of mind?

so that means if i want to be happy even if everything around me is falling apart

in my mind i can create a psychological world that would make me.... happy ....?

or what

i dont understand what did myself tell me

why do i care so much if im lonely

u know my friend from college we go to same computer science college

hes a very smart man but a fake FUCKING friend, plastic as fuck

he reads philosophy booms and told me

"when a man is lonely for long enough, he will slowly start to fall apart"

that is me...... that is ...truth......

he quoted a philosopher from some book

zzzz

he also said a quote he read about the meaning of life

"this life is endless pain and the only purpose of life is to reduce this pain as much as possible so we can be happy"

what the fck that is incredibly depressing

what the fuck im actually crying rn

i feel stabbed in the back and left behind and cheated on, all of those happened and some of them are happening right now

dont know what to think about the reasons

all of this causes me such huge anger and depression and that is whT keeps me going

going by working harder than i am supposed to

without all this hurt there would be no glory

all this effort..... it better pay off at the end...... please God..... i beg you....

i have completed 50% of my life purpose, let me do the rest so i can die in peace...

Living life with regular work (8 hours per day, programming) and studying CS for masters degree is fucking disaster... I cant wait for end, all I do is fucking thinking. All I have is this one hour when I go to the gym and some time with my gf... I'm afraid when this ends (5 weeks) I wont know what to do in my spare time... Oh I know! Writing my masters thesis....

Coding was and is the thing that currently feeds me the most efficient way. But it's also what caused to cringe and to hate people the most because of legacy code and immensely narrowminded dimwits aka clients.
But yeah: Coding is love, coding is life. ❤️

i just saw a macbook pro 13" for the first time in my life irl in a shopping mall

1) what the fck

2) how the fkc can someone work on a screen This small, my fckin dick is bigger than this screen

3) who the fkkk buys such a small screen laptop at a price of $3777 !!!!!!!

I wonder what the average lifespan is of a developer.
Is it higher or lower then the average life expectancy?
Does it have to do with our mindset? Or are our clients so terrible that we have more stress? If so does devRant lower our stress?

Man I am sick and tired of developers (I was about to put that in quotes, but it's mean), acting "cool" all the time. Like let me just put it out there, WTF is dAy iN tHE LiFE oF A sOftWaRe deVELoper.

Get the fuck out here. All you do is eat, walk, eat, chat, laugh and fuck around all day, with no work being done. And I'm supposed to respect you. Educate these young and fresh developers on what it is really like, rather than teasing them with the ideal life they think it is.

I just spent 4 hours troubleshooting 2 pcs, neither of them working yet. I'm way too tired, and I'm not even sure what I'm saying is correct English but I don't care. Man, fuck my life. I just wanna go to bed, but my brain doesn't think that's a good idea

Everyday I come to work. I feel miserable. Everyday write code. Fix difficult bugs. Go home dinner sleep. Tomorrow repeat.

I am reading Jia jiang's story. Mel Robbins 5 seconds. Christ grace's lectures. Still feel miserable. What is the meaning of life? All I want is to teach people code.

How fucking hard is it to write simple documentation with everything you need to get something working for fucks sake. Several fucking hours of my life later and I'm still no closer to figuring out what the fuck is going on with something that should simple. FUCK!!

Now finally im in a phase of my life..... Where.... I dont know what the fuck is going on anymore 🤣🤣🤣🤣

i hate this fucking life so much why do i have to fucking exist WHAT IS THE FUCIJG POINT OF DOING SOMETHING YOU HATE WITH PASSION DOIMG AND NOT DOING WHAT U WANT TO BE DOING I DO NOT UNDERSTA D THIS LIFE

THIS existence/life is the Biggest BITCH i have ever fucking met FUCK YOU

CANNOT BE SUCCESSFUL DOING SOMETHING YOU HATE.

there was a philosopher who said "this life is pain and the only purpose of living is to reduce this pain as much as possible in order to be more happy" WHAT THE FCUK THAT IS MORE DEPRESSING THAN HAVING A FKIG CANCER

WHY DONT I JUST GET SOME INCURABLE DISEASE INSTEAD OF LIVING? OR GET HIT BY A CAR?

WhAT

I AM SO FUCKING NOT IN THE MOOD FOR ANYTHING

WHAT

as i was writing this rant by coming back from ffffffftffffffffffFFFfFFFfFFFFCKING college i went into a bus and there was a woman in front of me with an english text on the back of her shirt saying "she believed she could so she did. she designed a life she loved." WHAT

YO WHAT

THIS WAS PUT IN FRONT OF MY FACE AT RANDOM SPONTANEOUSLY

DID GOD JUST GIVE ME A FKIG SIGN OR SOMETHING?? "MY LIFE SUCKS RIGHT NOW BUT I CAN TURN IT INTO THE LIFE I LOVE" IS THAT WHAT A HIGHER SPIRITUAL BEING IS TRYING TO TELL ME RIGHT NOW???

WHAT IS THIS

HOW DO I FEEL RIGJT NOW

I DONT GET IT

MHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hh

Currently working on a new project with a group of people, (about 8 guys, no ladies 😒).

Anyways, out of the eight, there are only 3 devs, 3 designers and 2 main idea guys. I'm a member of all 3 sets and to top it of, the other designers don't know what they are doing.

Life is beautiful, fucking beautiful.

This is my first rant but I don't understand what a rant actually is so yeahhh I m totally confused now lol😁😁. Btw I hope everyone is good and doing great in their life. And I don't know what to write next so bye bye for now

Company Emails that tell you
who they are
what believe in.
How they were the market leaders since the stone age.
what their values are
what their holistic approach to life is. How they are diversifying inclusiveness to include diversity.
And how all of this bull shit ties into you being a ideal employee of the organisation
Just to get you to fill a damn form.

Makes me wish the next attempt at human extinction succeeds.

what the hell this friendo just sent me a 100 line Julia function with variables names like `sauce` and `thingy` and expected me to debug it. And I guess his tab key was broken cause there was no indentation at all. Did I mention I’ve never used Julia in my life? Is this just Julia culture?

im the only person in my company who has any sort of tech skill. Im the only dev here, the only IT guy here, and pretty much the only person who can use a computer outside of facebook. And my CEO is expressing concerns as to what i do? Life of startup hell

Sometimes just I hate school.

While my gf had to take 2 "Leistungskurse" ("advanced courses"), I have to take 3.
Also, our little-country-side school doesn't offer IT-class as a Leistungskurs. So besides Math, I need 2 extra courses I am super-not interested in. I chose English since it's okay (but I'm not really good either) and ( ._.) chemistry. I had a good teacher in 10th grade but now I have this teacher who
- uses 1980 material
- explains not/bad most times
- is childish as fuck (we are 17-18 y/o)
- expects too much (we need to learn everything by heart)
- throws ugly, unorganized prints at us w/o context & explaination
and I could name more. My A-levels are going to be so fucking bad. Tuesday is my chemistry exam. Kill me, please......

var manual = '.... use chrome...';

User: "Hey this thing is broken, can you fix it?"
Me: "Works just fine for me, what browser are you using?"
User: "Edge, why?"

..... god I hate browsers.... rtfm bitch.. make my life easier please?...
Sometimes I wish I only did back end work...

Recently I see people installing Linux distros to their Macbooks. Is MacOS that bad? I mean I use Ubuntu in my daily life but let's accept that most of the Linux distros (for desktop of course) has hickups. I haven't used MacOS but there is a big company maintaining and optimizing it for just few machines. What is the point installing a Linux distro to a Mac?

First day in introduction to programming. We were the first course to learn Python instead of Java. The whole lecture consisted only of what Python is good for and how powerful it is.
He finished with the statement: “... and in the real life, no one writes applications in Python.“

!Dev

I soon will start working from home. meaning I won't have to waste 4 hours a day busing back and forth from the office.

I think with that free time I might start trying to organize my life, I have hundreds of 'read later' and 'useful' bookmarks across 3 computers, too many browsers, and countless bookmark folders. I also have notes in 7 channels on a private discord server.

I think with the free time I might actually clean up that massive mess and using my server I didn't have last time I worked from home, actually figure out a method that'll help keep it from getting this bad again.

Anything i try in this life, it fails. I have done hundreds, and have 0 successful projects. When someone asks me "what have you done in these 1/4th of a century existing on this useless floating space rock?" ...... I have nothing to say. It would appear as if I've done Nothing. I have nothing to showcase of projects because its not running live on production. It's all on private repositories. The more i try the harder i fail. I am energy drained. I am uninspired. I am unmotivated. Seeing how some 19 year old NOBODY kid just comes out of nowhere, makes NFT project, scams people for millions of dollars and haves fun in his life and doesnt have to work anymore, is fueling me with RAGE. This is starting to become madness. Am i having too high goals and ambitions and that's why i percieve myself as if im unsuccessful? But how is that possible if a 19 year old nobody is capable of becoming a multi millionaire by scamming people in web3? If i lower my goal expectations, then I have no reason to live. I wouldnt care if i die tomorrow or continue living. I wouldnt bother looking left right while crossing the road because I Do Not Care. What must i do to succeed just Once and meet my goals and expectations? I dont understand. I hate life. Life is empty and meaningless. I have became a Nihilist and i believe in that religion more than anything. It makes no sense that someone scams millions by doing jack shit at a young age while someone struggles and tries hard his whole life and still isnt successful even 0.01% of what the 19 year old is. IT. IS. NOT. FAIR.

Can someone please tell me what is so attractive about a dynamically typed language? It's not like it makes anyone's life easier – it just leads to more unexpected errors.

Thought experiment time:

Imagine that this whole universe is a simulation created by a Group Of Developers (GOD).

- Who would make up this group?
- What kind of design patterns would they follow?
- What type of programming language would they use?
- What kind of bugs are there if any?
- How do they test?
- Assuming the use of quantum computing, what are the implications? Parallel simulations? All possibilities play out?
- Would the controller input be life?
- Who is AI and who are players?
- Has all time already been rendered?
- Do we respawn?
- What would the leaderboard look like?
- What kind of stats are tracked
- What are dreams, nightmares, lucid dreams, sleep paralysis, birth and death?
- How is memory stored, accessed and pruned?
- What kind of neural net is used and where?

etc etc, if you can think of any other interesting fire away

the closer i get to the ending

the higher the resistance

the harder i fight the battle to win

the harder life tries to prevent me from winning

just when we were about to finish

just in that moment life did its best to not make it happen

why

what do you want from me

i am just a human being

what wrong have i done in trying to help mankind

what is happening

why is this happening

what... do you want..... from me.......

What a joy working in a company that uses git as if it's subversion (dev branches? What are dev branches?) paired with gerrit. Getting a single, crucial change pushed to the actual repo can take days. The speed of the site can be measured in geological epochs. The interface has a charm of windows 95. Half of the builds are broken. Life is fleeting and I'm wasting it here.

Been in the zone for a while..emm a long while...a pretty long while.

Need human interaction. So, umm Hiiii !!!

I have a random question:

What values do you guys live with?

And how can I make sure I live my life with highest possible values?

The squad here is most raw and honest. I have seen you folks stick to what you believe in and stand up against the evil even if costs you or makes you sacrifice somethings.

Really want to be a better human and seems like my next phase of life would be dedicated to this.

Today I read a comment on devRant about somebody asking what 1337 means. I think most of us know (almost trivial, maybe?), but what is really great is that so many people replied explaining what it means. Some replies were awesome, some were creative, some were just a basic answer to the question.

But none were hateful. ❤️

DevRant is a place for awesome people like you who understand that every one of us doesn't know something every day. That's developer life. That's devRant life too! The other day I told a senior developer about a Haskell project of mine and he asked: 'What is Haskell?' I was impressed, but it taught me a lot.

On devRant I see no troll comments like 'omfg fucking retard, you must be a faggot and live in a dumpster', which are common on the www nowadays and could have been found under a question like 'what is 1337?'. But not here. And this, while I see the occasional swearing in rants, but never at other members.

So thank you for just being normal people among other normal people. We swear at each other's fugly code sometimes, but we are a creative bunch of smart asses that stay classy at it.

👊

My mom came home crying

I thought she watched a sad dog movie again in the cinema

She said she came back from the doctor

Immediately i felt extreme distress, cause my mom never cries from doctors unless it is something extremely serious such as cancer (she had cancer surgeries about 3 times over 15 years)

I asked what is it

She said she has to do... a heart surgery....

why..... what kind of life is this

A tech as well as a life question (actually more of a useless sleepless thought) : What do you think is more important? Exposing yourself to multiple technologies, career paths and life experiences or diving deep into a single technology, career path and life experience?

I feel like being an expert in 1 tech might pay off in terms of job life , and it would be bad for a person who is constantly switching between career paths, but sometimes i feel like i should have tried other paths too. Not just the life of a techie, like people who are deep into media and journalism, accountancy or those film industry jobs ; politics or finances , etc.

Its like, we found an apple to be a tasty fruit and now we have to be the apple guy forever. The better i am in being the apple guy, the more i will have to eat apples and the more i will earn. Why can't i try pears or oranges?

!rant
!dev

What are you opinions on the Life is Strange series if you've played them?

I finished my collage and got a job in a very good company which paid very handsome salary and I was excited very much as I always wanted to be a developer and develop application which would be used by many people , but as the days gone by in my workplace i felt to depressed at work and slowly the interest and excitement faded away , sometimes I question myself what is the purpose of life and what iam doing ?

Happy New year
May you have a year that is filled with love and bugs, laughter and debugging , brightness and dark theme , hope and distro hopping and little less windows vs linux shit 😂 please arch guys you too 🙄😝
Wish you all a great year 😅😛

I rarely post anything but I'm pretty active reading every shit post here. we fucking have a great community here. Few people are going through some real shit , hey you, things will get better don't lose hope but don't just wait on it , things don't ever get better by just wishing. Do what has to be done no matter how hard that decision can be.
Cut all those toxic people from your life doesn't matter who they're. You all deserve better
Believe in yourself. Everyone is going through some real shit. Keep fighting. Live for yourself.
You got only one life live upto your fill potential.
Regret is the worst thing so do whatever the fuck you want to do.
Never give up doesn't matter what you're going through.
And in the end may you "live" all the days of your life.

It's the simple things in life that makes me feel that being programmer is fun.

Copying all jpgs from 100 folders? Done.

Ofc I could have searched the folder via Normal finder search, selected them and then copied like a normal human being but wasting more time to do the same thing is what being an engineer about :D

I think I used to identify myself heavily by my work, career and so felt very dissatisfied I wasn't living up to my potential and getting the chances