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Android Developer job ads next week:
* +10 years of experience in Kotlin.
* +3 years developing enterprise level apps using Kotlin.10 -
At Job interview.
Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
Me: I see myself as the leader of a raider group, robbing and scavenging together pieces of what is left of the civilization in hopes to build a weapon powerful enough to take the world back from a rogue AI, which I built myself few years earlier.
Interviewer: What!?
Me: What?15 -
It happened! It finally happened.
I got to use the XOR operator today, for the first time in my 10 years of development.
Now I feel complete. I am senior developer now!9 -
Me when I'm FREE :
Hmm, I don't have anything to do, let's sleep for 10 hours..
Me when I have to STUDY :
Let's watch that latest episode of Mr. Robot
Let's complete that side-project I started to 10 years ago..
Let's learn something new in Android Development...
Let's scroll devRant..20 -
The CEO asks God:
"God, how much time do you need to create the earth?"
God: "uh, 10 billion years I think"
CEO: " You have only 7 days. Well 6, the last one is to fix everything gone wrong after deploying"
And here we are6 -
Junior job requirements be like:
Required:
5 year experience in Php,
8 years experience in JavaScript,
Masters degree in CS,
10 years experience in React and or AngularJS
Bonuses:
Worked for Microsoft in their first year.
Salary: 20k/PA 6 month performance review.9 -
note: Not the worst dev I've interviewed but worst I've worked with.
A guy who worked in my company before me "HARDCODED" the entire calendar for next 10 years starting 2016 in dictionaries and arrays in Python for a project.12 -
It doesn't matter what I'm programming in, every time my wife sees me writing code she'll tell me "I think you forgot a semi-colon there".
I guess it was funny the first 3 times, but after 10 years, every day?22 -
If I do a job in 30 minutes it’s because I spent 10 years learning how to do that in 30 minutes. You owe me for the years, not the minutes.12
-
I saw an ad today for "Wix Code". Yes, you can officially code your Wix page with their javascript framework.
Cue recruiters looking for candidates with "10 years of wix development"13 -
A good programmer can get more done than 10 bad programmers, but a bad programmer's code can keep 10 good programmers busy for years.
~ Ed Weissman8 -
Father: Son, you're capable of doing anything you want, you can conquer the world if you believe in your dreams.
10 years later...
Father: WTF, Python programmer? Really son?5 -
Lmao I’ve never learned how to program. I’m just winging it and have been able to fool everyone the last 10 years.
Senior engineer checking in.
11 -
I was looking through some code I wrote 10-15 years ago. Seriously, WTF? Makes me want to invent a time machine to go back in time and punch myself in the face.5
-
Resume: experience in c, c++, java and Android.
Recruiter: DO YOU HAVE 10+ YEARS EXPERIENCE WITH SWIFT AND IOS??!!8 -
My teammate used p tag and made it look like a button using css.
He has 10 years of web development experience.14 -
When people think that a 3 weeks online programming course get them equal to your 10 years experience 😑7
-
The IT Crowd got it right about facebook 10 years ago.
Talk about Simpsons predictions coming true.
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
When I was 10 years old, all kids at my school got access to school emails. The email address book contained everything in my city, like fire department, all pupils of all schools etc. So I decided to "test" the system by sending out a mass email to everyone in the address book (about 3k) with the question "Hi, how are you?".
The sys admins apparently didn't think very far as I got some responses saying like "You have crashed a server in the capital city" and "I have contacted your local IT admin".
So I went to the IT admin and told him the situation. His face turned red of anger and I remember him almost screaming at me.
Who the fuck doesn't set up protection for this and gives out access to 10 year olds? This was 15 years ago, I really hope sys admins are smarter today!6 -
My iPhone can't turn on after being off for 10 days. Tried everything.
Fuck you Apple. Its 21st century. My nokia from 10+ years still can charge.12 -
a client wants a nice clean website that doesn't look like it's 10 years old. then they ask for like everything that made the old site terrible5
-
It has been every loooong time since I have visited our huge local forest with its small mountains. About 10 years actually.
It feels great!
2 -
Hate to admit it but: I went back to Windows on my dev machine after running Linux as main OS for like 10 years. I came to the point where I'm tired of driver problems and broken bootloaders and just want things to work...37
-
We don’t use the same technology we used 10 years ago but we have the same people holding office for 30+ years.4
-
Just when I thought I'd seen the craziest job ad...
Title: Sr. Lead Data Scientist / Python Developer
Required education: bachelor's in CompSci, Math, etc. PhD preferred (lol)
Required experience: 10+ years in Python development
Other requirements: must be under 25 years of age to qualify for funding from EcoCanada (lmao!!!! y'all trippin)
Who is writing these job ads? I swear they get more insane every day.12 -
#wannaCry Ransomware:
US engineers trying to find antivirus
Europe engineers finding preventing tools
meanwhile...
Indian engineers already updated their resume with " Worked/Implemented fix for wannaCry ransomware"
Meanwhile...
Indian HR consultants asking for minimum 5 years experience in handling "wannacry"
And meanwhile....
in Hyderabad Ameerpet - people might be seeing banners of training institutes mentioning that they have trainers available with 10 years of industry experience on this.😜😜😝😝6 -
I started learning php at age 15, copying code from tutorials, changing stuff until it worked. Now 10 years later I still copy code from tutorials and change stuff until it works...3
-
an actual recruiter on LinkedIn:
looking for a full stack developer with 10+ years of experience with React programming and 5+ years of experience with the blockchain and machine learning.13 -
Had a plan to master JavaScript in 4 months and then, cover HTML and CSS in the next 3 months followed by Java in the remaining 5 months.
10 years later, I am still learning JavaScript.9 -
Mom: You gave our keyboard a virus with your programming! You're not allowed to use the computer any more!
(the keyboard was 10 years old)2 -
Be a 17 year old intern with 10 years experience in a language or technique which was invented 6 years ago.5
-
"Users don't need or like detailed error messages. Just use a generic phrase like `an error occurred`. Visually it looks nicer and they won't read it anyway"
- Lead UI / UX Designer, large m.n.c, 10+ years experience10 -
For 10 thousand years I have pronounced "Nginx" as "En ginns" just found out from Ubuntu's official page that it is pronouned "Engine-X".
What a shame (－‸ლ)19 -
Temporary coworker with 10+ years experience, working on C++ codebase with me since 3 months, just asked me what the continue-statement in C/C++ does.
That must be either a sign of an upcoming apocalypse, or me being heavily underpaid.6 -
Just for reference in the post. I'm 24 years old.
Guy: How long have you been programming?
Me: I started when I was about 10, so about 14 years
Guy: are you one of the anonymous?
Me: ...15 -
Me to customer, several years ago:
Your server is over 10 years old, and the support for it will soon be gone together with the possibility to take backups. You should upgrade your website ASAP.
Customer said:
ok, we will look into it.
This day:
Customer:
Hi, our site is down and we need backups from yesterday. Can you please fix?
Me:
Sorry, no. *send copy of the email several years ago*2 -
You shouldn't look for people with 10 years experience. You shouldn't exclude them but the people w/o experience need experience anyways and maybe they bring something fresh to your tables..
I know "designers" who would say they have 10+y.e. but I mean they design websites that to this day, use table layout and oldish looking design language.. (ofc there are examples that state the opposite!)
Measuring people by their years with experience is just silly..9 -
After working in a different field (marketing) for over 10 years and a 6 month crash course I got a programming job at a kickass development company! Yeah!3
-
I worked 76 hours in a row once, when I first learned Laravel.
I wanted to see if I could clone a site I created 10 years earlier that took 2 months.
I succeeded.
I took copious amounts of Adderall, though.
I don't recommend it.2 -
I spent 10 years of my life to learn how to code when I could make big money without coding. I'm such an idiot
13 -
The freelancer...
We are looking for someone to design a logo with no less than 2 years Javascript, 10 years Intel IO low level engineering in assembly, 2 months pascal, 14 weeks of HTML5, 17.23567 years of ASCII C, and you must have a half pint of strawberry ice cream in your freezer. $20.00 firm.5 -
I can't get a job because I don't have experience because I can't get a job because I don't have experience because I can't get a job because THEY WANNA HIRE A JUNIOR ROCKSTAR CODER WITH 10 YEARS EXPERIENCE IN ANGULAR9
-
10 years in dev and can't seem to keep up with all these languages. I learn one forget the other. Mix up syntax. Features removed or added.
Still use cheat sheets which I update as the languages change.
Just me or everyone else?9 -
when you go to a coworker for pair programming and he insists that you write on his very very dirty and since 10 years never cleaned keyboard...
5 -
First proper vacation in 12 years. Six days in sunny Gran Canaria.
Lost two days to a hurricane, one day to misleading holiday description and then caught COVID.
3/10 would not recommend.4 -
You know what really grinds my gears?
You spending three hours googling for a solution to an issue, only to find a message board that has a 404 link to a solution, which was posted 10 years ago.5 -
I bypassed SSL certificate verification because that goddam certificate had some flags which my JVM did not understand and threw errors. Still in prod after 10+ years 🤐1
-
When you have over 10 years experience... and nothing to show for it due to closures, redesigns and private work.
It’s not making my job hunt any easier.8 -
AWS just sent me an email threatening to terminate my account because I have a $0.18 pending bill. Wow Amazon! Just wow! How many years does it take you to make $0.18? 5? 10?11
-
After 10 years of development, and 7 years of being happily married, I'm in love again... With Unit Testing.
-
My colleague and I have 12 years of college and 10 years of experience between us. Can't figure out how to connect a fucking phone headset.2
-
My company is looking for a new React FE.
Just got a response to the add...
"I have 10 years experience with react and styled components."9 -
Browsing job postings, and some of these requirements are just crazy, and/or wtf. Here's an example:
Front End developer wanted, junior to mid-level. An ideal candidate will be an expert in PHP, C#, and Java. Minimum experience of 10 years. Estimated compensation 30,000 per year.
Entry level full stack developer. Must be an expert in SQL. 5 years experience, BS in computer science required.
Web Developer intern - must have 3 years of experience. Must be an expert in x, y, z. This position is unpaid.
Sheeit.6 -
"Ah no, reusable frameworks and libraries are a terrible idea. What you need is a bunch of very lightweight files that you can copy / paste from project to project"
- Mobile Architect, Large m.n.c, 10+ years experience.4 -
Became an uncle to two beautiful girls the other week. But the plan to make them the future tech support of the family is already in play! Hopefully they will exceed me in about 10 years, I'm a front-end dev so it shouldn't be that hard...
-
When did avocados become so popular?
10 years ago almost no one knew what they were and now they're more prevalent than hummus 🥲32 -
I just got asked by a colleague why do I use different levels of a logger. He said he's been writing code for 10+ years and never needed anything other than Logger.debug() 🤦♂️
Where the fuck these guys get their degrees? 😒22 -
!rant
Our colleague is celebrating his 10 years at our company, he's in for a surprise :D
(Spray Chalk)
6 -
Junior developer vacancy.
requirement:
minimum of 10 years experience in angularjs.
I just saw this.8 -
Not exactly wrong there. I got started at 10 with odds and ends for fun.
Took a semester of it in college before switching because the compiler and I didn't get along.
Only to pick it back up via self-study 10 years later because the programmer who came on board for a side project never showed up and I wanted to keep things moving.
10 years later still, I'm now running a web design shop full time.
-
My 10 years experienced Boss is learning about Git NOW !!
And he pretend to know everything already and put his ass on every task.6 -
people so damn concerned with what language you have or haven't used
i've been doing this for 10 years, give me the damn language or framework and i'll learn it and be productive in few weeks
sheesh5 -
var i = 0;
setInterval(function(){
document.getElementById("el").style.width = i + "px";
i+=10;
},100);
And, children, this is how we were used to create animations years ago7 -
"Fresh grad ~ 10 years of experience"
Dafuk is that supposed to mean. Does HR have to know IT just to get that shit right?
8 -
Last 10 years of database leaks.
Will next 10 years will be as interesting in security like last decade ?
8 -
When I design a website I always give my best to make it look modern and responsive. Then I look at a website of a local company and want to throw up.
-
Confession: In my almost 10 years of professional dev experience, I have never written any kind of units tests for my code. Ever.15
-
You have 2 years to live. You have a spouse and kid. Google offers half your salary to your spouse for 10 years and survivor’s benefits for your kid until they’re 23 (correct if I’m wrong) if you die while being employed by them.
Would you spend those 2 years practicing algorithms and your CS knowledge to get into Google? Or spend the precious little time you have left with your family?8 -
I maintain some of the top 10 most downloaded packages in the Javascript ecosystem - in the order of hundreds of millions of downloads a week. I've worked with hundreds of repositories, thousands of OSS developers, across a few dozen teams (professionally). I've seen just about all of it, for almost 10 years now.
With all that being said, I'll leave it at this:
I hate every facet of the Javascript ecosystem.14 -
Junior coders want to argue about database design saying an employee table in the database does not need a start date and end date because the requirements don't say that. I am doing gold plating he says. He didn't care that I had been doing this over 10 years and he 0 years. Oh yea and by the way I have never been given specific requirements about database design.4
-
For anyone that is about that life, Vim 8.0 has been released, the first major Vim release in 10 years.
https://groups.google.com/forum/...1 -
If you have been a software developer for more than 10 years and still like your job you are either not really a software engineer or have mental health issues.10
-
10 PRINT "HELLO"
20 GOTO 10
RUN
It was the late 80's or early 90's, I was around 10 years old, and my jaw dropped when I typed this on the Atari 800XL my parents had just given to me.
Hooked ever since :)3 -
Here is what I see in industry right now.
Don't go on math but get the gist.
1. 9 of 10 developers are Web developers
2. 9 in 10 developers want to be data scientist
3. 9 out of above actually give up and start doing Web development
4. 9 in 10 developers think CS education is not necessary.
5. 9 in 10 developers want to work for Google Facebook and Microsoft.
6. 9 in 10 developer don't make it to above companies.
7. 9 in 10 developers think design and test are important but never do it.
8. 9 out of 10 developers don't want to code after 5 years and just want to exit industry to non technical roles.
9. 9 out of 10 developers don't get rants and dev memes posted here.
What's your take on this7 -
import time
time.travel('now-10 years')
self.slap()
time.travel('now+10 years')
Does anyone know how to get the travel method working?3 -
Time I made a friend... oh due to code?
Well yea let’s solve the first part of this first 😢
Actually I met my significant other putting my self through tafe (you aussies will know) nearly 10 years ago so I guess that counts 😎2 -
I interviewed for a big named company who I really admired to work on some video stuff .. My technical interview lasted 10 minutes swiftly followed by a #fail email ... Two years later I had the opportunity to interview again and got a position ! Never stop learning1
-
Signed up for a market research company (ironically, that I used to work for as a transcriber about 10 years ago) to pull in a bit of extra cash.
They sent an e-mail back confirming my registration.
With the password in plaintext.3 -
:-)
This just occurred to me: 20 years ago, we were telling our parents: look, when you tilt your head, it looks like a smiley face. We use these instead of facial expressions.
In another 10 years, we may be telling our children: look, when you tilt your head, it looks like a smiley face. We used these instead of emoji.6 -
How to psych-out a machine learning algorithm:
> Use a platform for 10 years
> Never like, comment, or give it any inkling of your preferences
> Like one random video
> Never log in again10 -
With the U.K now set to leave the EU my emigration plans to Australia just advanced 10 years #willcodeforvisa
-
#10 year challenge is basically data set father for new ai which will predict how X looks after 10 years
Data mining at its best2 -
When a company operates like a startup but they're over 10 years old and they try to do the micro brew lunch thing and be "casual" but they pay you like shit and the boss is a moron.1
-
Professional .NET Developer here:
After years of using Windows and C# for everything at work and at home, I finally switched yesterday from Windows 10 to Arch and from C# to Python for my hobby projects. Feels good!2 -
I use yahoo email as my main email, because that's what my father used when I first created an account like 10 years ago... That was a big fucking mistake it seems...5
-
My college teaches us perl now😑
Being in a college whose curriculum is 10 years old is fucking sick.
I mean really 10 fuckin years old.. Dude this is computer science field, shit changes so fast here, new languages, new standards, new frameworks and these guys don't give shit about that.
Wasting so much of my time attending these shit classes because i have to maintain 75% attendance in every subject or else i wont be allowed to write an exam.
FML5 -
!(!StrangeRant)
I want to have a program that makes programs.
----CONSOLE------------------------
$ sudo makep
(makep = make program)
$ makep > destroy the world and make that me and i are the only survivor
$ makep > select language > TrumpLang
$ makep > Please wait...
$ makep > Compiling...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
(i died)
$ makep > .........
$ makep > Building...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
$ makep > .........
(ok, so i wont wait 1 million years here, so lets say 1 million years passed)
$ makep > Running...
Estimated time to finish: 1 million years later
$ makep > .........
(ok, so i wont wait 1 million years here, so lets say 1 million years passed)
$ makep > Destroying...
$ makep > Finished!
$ makep > Press CTRL+F to shut down.
-----------------------------------
Earth stopped.
This computer is the only survivor.
While he was compiling, he got artificial intelligence.
He tried to survive.
Now the story begins.
The life of a computer.
Alone.
In theaters at 2018/04/01.
Buy tickets now!
IMDB / RT rated this movie 10/10
-----------
Footnotes
This movie is containing parental advisory content.
(This is sponsored by the awesome people at Turbo C and IBM)9 -
!rant
Oh yea. Got an interview on the first try to the best devshop in town. Exited! Let's hope our interests meet. Applying for the first time in 10 years. Feels like going on a first date. =D5 -
Tried learning python like over 10 times from the basics. No success!
Being a Java developer for about 5 years, I think I can't live without semicolons 😂3 -
Leaving my current job, after being there for 10 years straight after uni, in 2 weeks! I have now been taken out of development and have to somehow write confluence docs of all my knowledge... Fml5
-
Boss: Hey, we have a meeting in 10 minutes.. Get prepared for it.. (Though they told me about this 100 years ago)
Me: What!! How can I do that?
Boss: You are an engineer.. You must be used to with last minute preparations..
Me: 😕
========================== -
!rant
I’ve worked at six companies over my 10 years of professional programming. All companies say they track internet usage of the employees. This is the first company I have worked for that sends you a weekly summary of sites that you visit.5 -
I came to know and use C++ for 10 years now and I've just seen this syntax:
for(int i{0}; i<5; i++) { }
WTF is this shit??10 -
Just found out, as of Nov 16, I've been on StackOverflow for 10 years.
I wish it was remotely as good as the old days.7 -
My company doesnt have promotions. We do get quaterly pay raises. But a person with one year experience has the same title as someone with 10 years experience.
I did get a promotion article at the train station today for drink yoghurt with a flavour.2 -
I mentioned on a cv about 10 years ago that I had maintained a website built on php. This CV is no longer in circulation and hasn't been for about 9.5 years, I'm still getting message from recruiters about php roles
Fml3 -
Times I have run into event loop / closure related issues in my 10+ years of JavaScript app development: 0
Times I have run into event loop / closure related issues in my 10+ years of interviewing: Uncaught RangeError: Maximum call stack size exceeded
SHEESH3 -
/**
Fresh university graduate.
Looks for positions to apply to.
Refines search to "Entry-level".
All minimum qualifications: 5-10 years industry
experience.
Cries.
**/7 -
> client paid 10 years in advanced for service
> 2 years later their support is trash, service is trash, competitors are cheaper, competitors offer more, ..
> sorry we can't refund you the unused money if you change service, have a nice day!3 -
Client complains about his website. Wants it to be more accessible and responsive. Website is older than 10 years and build with frames...7
-
NNNNNGH IT DRIVES ME SO CRAZY WHEN I DO MY PERSONAL DEV IN GLORIOUS MASTER RACE LANGUAGES BUT THIS PROJECT FORCES ME TO SWITCH TO 10 YEARS OLD TECHNOLOGY THAT TAKES 10 YEARS TO EVEN COMPILE ON MY POTATO PC3
-
androidx.activity 1.0.0-alpha01 release notes:
"Pending input events (such as clicks) are now canceled in onStop()."
Welcome in 2018! It just took 10 years to fix this ... better late than never 👍1 -
So now you can hire a container with computers and all that stuff so you can start mining crypto currency immediately... What is humanity going to be in 10 years? Everyone's just gonna mine Bitcoins instead of working? 😦
6 -
Dilbert no longer lets me leech their comics from their site... It was a good... 10 years?
Seems I need to rebuild my Downloader... using Selenium.
Now...where is that project where i used Selenium...1 -
Been using linux for over 10 years, just got so-called-fast-no-windows-defender-no-bloatware-completely-revamped-clean-and-resource-efficient Windows 10 Lite poromotion by 3 close friends. we are now enemies.
-
If you ++ this post, you will get good developer karma credits for the next 10 years, and every piece of code you write will eventually work.
Trust me this actually works, you can try it yourself.2 -
How can you be a Server Administrator for more that 10 years when you don't know what a Terminal/Commandline is and that there's a difference between GET and POST?5
-
10 years ago I was learning how to program in college,
Now working in IT company I stare at Excel Sheets and scratch my head.
#10yearschallenge -
Recruiters be like
We are looking for a fresh graduate with 1000 projects and 10 years of experience8 -
Day 5 in quarantine: I miss my fuckin pig ignorant arrogant toxic motherfucker boss and coworkers ! I learned to deal with those motherfucker everyday for 7 Years.
Ps: 10 years ago I loved my wife. 😥4 -
I was just informed by email that it's my 9 year anniversary at my company....
Which also means I've been working for... 9 years.
First thing I checked was whether I'm fully qualified for social security and disability.... Apparently I was qualified a long time ago.
Next thought was "it's almost 10 years since I graduated...."3 -
We just got a new web dev with 10+ years experience with the goal of helping out our rather inexperienced small team.
His first PR was for a rather large form with 30+ fields.
He. used. a. <table/>......To layout the entire thing! With inline floats no less!
How the f do you spend the last 10 years not bothering to pickup any modern css?6 -
Ah the managers have come up with a new term we need to implement: "SEO Doubleposting"
I must bow down to their technical genius and prowess, I've never heard it before, it must be high tech term beyond my 10+ years of being a developer.4 -
It's really strange being an intern at a company, and having 95% of your co-workers be 5-10+ years older than you. The age gap makes it feel hard to communicate and make any friends. :/4
-
Smells like a new laptop.
Switched to Windows 10 after using Mac for past 16 years.
Not nearly as painfull as I expected.
MacOS Sierra in VMware to make the switch even easier...
10 -
Seeing how smartphones are advancing every year, I would say in about 10-20 years, we will see lots of people using smartphones as their personal computer
What do you think?13 -
Unrealistic employer:
Looking for a Full Stack developer with 8 years experience in Swift and 10 years experience with PHP.2 -
That #facepalm moment when the person you are interviewing has 2 years of experience, rates himself 8/10 in JAVA and doesn't know the difference between abstract class and interface!4
-
I've got a Pentium 4 as a desk work companion. In 10 years what do you think should be replacing it?
10 -
Right now I need to fix 10 years old php code handling data sets coming from a database. Normally I work mostly on C#.
God, do I miss LINQ!8 -
People say they don't remember 10 years back.
Sh*t, I don't even remember this code. I mean, I wrote it like yesterday3 -
Animator for 15+ years. Started self learning python a few months back. I made my first useful app today... Move the cursor every 10 seconds. 2019 is off to a good start.
I'm new to programming but I already love devRant.
Happy New Year everyone! 😀5 -
Damn dood - I would be willing to bet yourself 10 years ago is amazed and proud of who you have become. Great job :)17
-
I got my first IT related real job. Im cisco certified and bachelor of applied sciences in computer science for 7 years. Programming for like 10 years. I have mixed feelings.
2 -
Found this line in code that's been in prod for 10 years
"int kak = object.getValue()"
There is no contextual reason for it to be called kak, which means shit in Afrikaans11 -
So... End of a decade is coming. What have we achieved in the last 10 years that is worth something?14
-
Interviewer : where do you see yourself in 10 years?
Me: (auto generated random text which doesn't make sense but is fancy) blah blah bla bla bla blah bla bla bla bla blah bla bla ...
My mind: are you hiring a dev or astrologer ?
-
Not using github and keeping my finished projects somewhere for past 10 years.
I've started when I was 13, I'm 23 now and only recently have I started saving my code on an external drive, a cloud and on some on github.4 -
I am living my dream.
I have a nice fam, enough capital, a job I enjoy, I'm enjoying the life in this world every day now. And yesterday I caught myself in a moment that 10 years ago I thought only happens in movies. An engineer participating in a meeting with the client while riding on a motorcycle.
I mean, how cool is that! It may not seem like much now, because it was a necessity - I had to be at 2 places at once. But a 10 years younger me would wet his pants if he knew I would one day be doing that IRL.
How about you? How would a 10 years younger you feel about the _now_ you?4 -
If you're a "software engineer" with 10+ years of experience, but you've never written a unit test.... you're just a script kiddie with no right to call yourself a "software engineer".9
-
Confession:
Owned a smartphone for 10 years, this month was my first time ever getting 3G/4G connection ...
I prefer no internet when I'm out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
For the first time in my life I removed a wrong commit with git rebase and I did not made a mess.
More then 10 years of using git and keep learning.
6 -
My boss has been working in web development for roughly 10 years now.
Today he learned about the existence of try/catch in JavaScript and asked me in which browsers it's
supported in 😢 -
Way too much stuff is having a Y2K type date error in 2020! So frustrating that people did not even think 10 years ahead. All this stuff is solved already and not implementing it well is just lazy.6
-
Everybody is complaining about Windows 10 updates, which makes me relish having turned off Windows Update ~7 years ago on my home pc. Everything has been working with minimal pain I the ass.
Yes, I'm perfectly fine with XP 😁7 -
10 years in small startups, and I start a FAANG level position on Monday.
The anxiety and imposter syndrome will have me dead by then...4 -
"You need five years of Java experience, with at least two years being Java 10, but if not at least seven years of C++17"1
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Making the decision to leave a large, safe corporation that I'd been at for 10 years, but going no where, for a small independent software house was extremely difficult. But now I feel like I make a difference and not just a cog in a machine.1
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C, C++, and Java are legacy programming languages.
So, for the ones who fear that the language will go away in mere 10-15 years. Chill. These languages will stay forever.18 -
10 years ago when I started this path I was undecided between computer science and helicopter pilot. I made the right decision!4
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Fingers crossed we can say goodbye to ping and latency problems in next 5-10 years. Exciting times we live in.
6 -
When you have an error and you search for the solution on Google a video pops up a there is a kid maybe 10 years old explaining the problem. 😥1
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I'm interviewing for a full stack developer position next week. Although I've over 10 years of experience and working as one right now (although in a shitty company), I'm fucking nervous!6
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I picked what I’m good at so solving puzzles after that it’s simple.
10 years experience rule or 10’000 hours of writing code.9 -
I was the first developer in my company. 5 years and 10 developers later...
source: https://bit.ly/2zWJrjN
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After 10 years of living a developers life, nowadays if someone appreciates my work, I look for sarcasm or hidden motive in it.
Why appreciate me, I'm anyways expected to do a great job. -
Im left speechless today when my boss (a dev for over 10 years) prefers to use WinMerge to manually merge frequent code changes instead of using the GIT source control.3
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Coding and standing up. Will these two ever develop a relationship and make me live 10 years longer?2
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Coworker has been working as a web developer at our company for 10 years... Yesterday I see him watching this video intently: https://youtu.be/PLA2FaOXkkg ?4
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When your legacy retarded old as fuck frameworks are slowly dying and instead of migrating to new backend framework, losing some money but improving quality of our products dipshits in charge hire vue.js developer to try to replace jquery with vue just to keep this 10 years old legacy zombie crap alive for 2 more years..
How can you be this fucking retarded greedy motherfucking morons... it shouldnt even be possible1 -
Where the fuck in my profile does it say that I have 10-12 years of Java server side experience?
If she actually looked at my LinkedIn, it says I graduates in 2011...
7 -
I just setup an apt-cache on my Macbook. Docker no longer takes 10 years to `apt-get install` when I'm at the coffee shop. This coffee shop is going to loose so much money now that my work is done faster.
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it's fuckin nuts sometimes to say some random shit to a regular person and realize that "oh shit, I'm a specialist at this right". some things seem so banal, i forget how much I've learnt these past 10 years2
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First time I started playing with the VB macros in Word making little joke viruses to scare my friends.
Was 1997 and I was about 10 years old. Thankfully my playful streak never went past harmless practical jokes.1 -
Lord help me, I think I might be getting into keyboard modding.
All I really wanted to do was repair the keyboard I've used for the last 10 years. I didn't realize there was a whole hobby surrounding it.6 -
Excited for WW3?
Need a junior developer with drone flight path automation engineering experience. Must have at least 10 years experience.43 -
Probably around 7 years old when planing on building a robot and discussing how we should get it to move. And also playing with lego.
Then at 10 years my mom lended home a couple if Sinclair ZX80 with 512 bytes of memory and I was hooked :D (they where brand new at that time)5 -
Pet peeve #3984 - when managers / salespeople anyone else pretends it's just appropriate to "add up" years of experience.
"I'm sure we can solve this, the team have over 100 years of coding experience between them"
...yeah, that's not how experience works, doofus. Unless you'd really trust 20 people with 6 month's experience over a single person with 10 year's experience.6 -
I accidentally factory resetted my HP48... FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!! 10 years or hard work... Completely gone... I don't know what to do with myself now...3
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"Some time ago I wanted to rewrite my old project. I saw code without comments and cried. Cried so much."
Programming teacher in college
People who teach us programming usually write a quicksort every year for 5-10 years. It is sad af :( -
Sometimes I think My company thinks like Hadoop ,
Instead of getting a experienced guy like 10 years exp . Let's take 5 with 2 years exp which should be more efficient !! 😒1 -
Dude. Gimp sucks. I've been using it for about 10 years, and I really want it to be something it's just never going to be. It just sucks.6
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Trying to learn Spanish for last 10 years and in the time, I have used at least 20 programming languages.
Nothing is as easy as it is.15 -
So started my new job this week (first Dev job after 4 years on various support desks) it’s going ok, but for some inexplicable reason they use visual source safe for version control.
I had to google it, i can’t even install it on Windows 10!8 -
Was freelance artist for 10 years.
Decided it would be easier to learn to program than to get clients to pay.3 -
10 years ago: a big red button that would play a random episode of a random TV show on our student home TV.
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https://devrant.com/rants/2366822/...
following rant I started oppening my files to build copy of have i been pwned service why twitter kept their passwords in plain text lol
...
people actually got 123456 passwords looking for my email in twitter database file
1 -
Whether you're a newbie or a programmer with 10+ years of experience, you'll always go to StackOverflow and GitHub 🤣😂
6 -
Does anyone else ever drink too strong coffee in one go because they're tired only to get a headache and still feel 10 years younger16
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When I was 12 i had a Friday afternoon course, as they called it, in QBasic. Nothing fancy but I learned that 'I wanted to work with computers'.
10 years later I got my first programming job. It was with the old Cognos Powerhouse language on OpenVMS. Does anyone remember that?
I had that job for 4 years and it took me another 10 (and several other IT jobs) before I started to learn Java, which I do now for 2 years.
That's my career story in a tiny nutshell 😎 -
When Windows 10 revives a memory error from running 32 bit apps on 64 bit architecture first logged and patched on Windows Server 2003. It was 13 years ago!
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A big hurdle I'm fighting for last 1 year, is to convince a bunch of people having 10+ years of experience not to make production released of the same codebase from multiple branches.
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Transferring our website from (outdated) SAPUI5 to VueJS.
It's so painful to look at 6 years old code... And at least 10 different coding styles.3 -
I started with my first Android project. Here are some of my observations.
Turning of fossil into fuel - 650 million years
Transformation of a star into supernova - 10 billion years
Complete gradle build - fuckzillion years2 -
Give me more fancy abbreviation questions.
After 10+ years of programming this will definitely improve my knowledge about software development.5 -
When I want to travel back in time I take a look into the legacy code I've wrote more than a 10 years ago.
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Boss was advised a collar and belt by doctor when he complained of back pains. He's 18 years in this software industry.
I completed 10, occasional aches and pains, time to start yoga lessons.2 -
Pc:- Downloading game started.
Me :- 🤓
Pc:- After 1hour , 7 % completed
Me:-😌
Pc:- After 24 hours, 18 % completed
Me:-😟
Pc:- After 10 days, 28% completed
Me:-😡
Pc:- After 1000 years , 99 % completed
Me:-👴👴RIP💀💀5 -
Me being the dumbass I was when I was younger, I decided it was a wonderful idea to record fucking Spongebob over my parents wedding... I’m still pissed with my self 10 years later. (This was on a VHS, in case you were wondering)
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Wk210
My hero is Matthew McConaughey from 10 years in the future. That Matthew McConaughey's hero is another Matthew McConaughey 10 years further in the future, who's hero is 10 years further still. It's infinite recursive Matthew McConaughey to the end of time.
What I'm trying to say is my only hope is to crash this simulation and end my depressing non-McConaughey existence.6 -
Imagine an entire operating system dedicated to running a web browser and only 1 web browser 10 years ago it would have been thought of as insanity2
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everyone has one function that they have to look up every time they use it. for me its str_replace() in php. i can never remember the order of the parameters...and ive been using it for almost 10 years....3
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Just a question guys:
What do you think will be the status of global technology (in a broad perspective) by, let’s say around 2025?
Also, what type of technology would you think will have a major impact for the next 8 to 10 years?4 -
well, my father told me that I need a real job. And you can only play games on computer. Well after more than 10 years when I have 8yrs of professional exp now Im earning enough and my father dont know what to say.2
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First contact with code was about 10 years ago, trying to customize my own server of the old Tibia (pre historic mmo game) with lua language
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So I’m the frontend developer in this company. I am the one with 10 years of experience when it comes to html, css and js.
How can it be then that I’m not invited to frontend meetings?
I checked the meetings colleages have and came across a excel sheet. My name is mentioned about 10 times in this sheet. Which was what the meeting was about. However I am not a part of this? Wtf?2 -
My teacher in school: Starts PC, after booting the SSO login prompt appears - teacher looks confused and doesn't know what to do because: "My computer always displays Google, where's my Google at?"
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So I have spent some time playing with Python, but as I understand it JavaScript is the language I should learn first?
I'm a fully fledged VBA Developer of 10+ years btw
Thought I better learn a useful language now though 😂4 -
Any swiss devs here?
What'd you say is a realistic annual salary in zurich at the moment for a senior backend (java) engineer with 10+ years of experience?
My online research shows somewhere between 110k-135k for bigger companies, is that realistic?8 -
1987 at seven years old. Dad bought me an Atari ST. It came with a Language Disc, containing the ST Basic program. Didn't know what it was, but dad learned from the guy in the shop it was for making your own programs.
So along with a manual, together we wrote our first program:
10 PRINT "ST";
20 GOTO 10
RUN
In the corner window, the results unravelled. I was so excited. Never looked back. -
Visual studio: *thinking for 10 years*
Me: looks like it's trying to validate bad connections on this SSIS package. *disables connection checking*
Visual studio: *thinking for 10 years* Validating connections... [Visual studio is not responding] -
There are 10(binary...) types of people.
After 10 years of coding I'm still struggling to decide which one I should use..
9 -
It was compulsory to study logo at the school, class 4. Was around 10 at that time. Love what I could make the turtle do with commands. FF 2 years, learnt HTML in school. Loved how some tags made a webpage. Didn't code for next 7 years(idiotic decision?). Started with Java and Android development and fell in love again. Didn't let it go this time 😀
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Hey all - do you think web development will be around in 10 years from now? And if so, how do you think it will change?5
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My biggest regret is excessive, ignorant use of the `Shadows` keyword in a big vb.net app. That's not how you do inheritance.
It's been almost 10 years, and I still cringe every time I think about it.2 -
I've been an Apple user for 13 years exclusively using macbooks and an iphone. It didn't start that way.
Today, I'm immensely enjoying Windows 10. It runs smoothly, it's so beautiful. I might end up building a gaming PC to further enjoy it.
God I've wasted so many good years.10 -
When the marketing guys fascinating about the future of e-commerce, with a backend stack which could have been developed 10 years ago ... But have been rolled out half a year ago. :O
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Deploying a full test strategy across the company's range of php products because you haven't been scheduled to do anything else and the company has no automated testing after 10 years of functioning.
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Not having to constantly engineer software. Honestly, this long-promised disruption is like nuclear fusion. Always 10-50 years away.
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Just took an online C++ test as part of a job application.
Got 7/10
Pass mark was 5.
I haven't used c++ for two years. What do you think my chances are for going forward?
Feeling really nervous about it.3 -
Pick one:
Live out your school life again as a 10-year old with the same level of knowledge you have now.
Or,
Be 65 years old with $10 million in the bank.42 -
I'm still doing my bachelors.
Anyone with a 9-5 job with 10+ years in the field not bored of everything in the universe and spending valuable time with family ?1 -
If you have 10 years experience in php and apply a JavaScript role with 3 month non commercial experience. You are a junior dev or intern. At least from employee's view3
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It started around 10 years ago, my first programming lesson is creating a simple actionscript using macromedia flash mx. It's a script that takes 2 input and print out the sum. I still have the script today. 😁
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So y'all chill, there are levels to this dev sh*t.
The question you are asking today on Stack Overflow has been asked and answered 9 years, 8 months ago — you might as well make it 10 years for good measure.1 -
What are you using for local environment? I'm stuck on xampp for 10 years. I realized that I'm having terrible pipeline from developing to production.6
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Not sure whether or not should share articles here but latest highlights of Fast Company are a pretty interesting read.
https://fastcompany.com/most-innova...
10 Lessons From 10 Years Of The World's Most Innovative Companies
https://fastcompany.com/3067781/... -
While shopping with my mom when I was 10 (that was 10 years ago…) I found a book called 'Andy\'s HTML'. That book got me started.
Followed by Wordpress later, couldn't stand that for long and quickly went over to real PHP projects. Eventually landed on Android because of school.
Good ol' times. -
Addicted to Visual Studio for past 10 years. Looking out for IDE which can be an alternative on Linux...
Any recommendation of IDE for a Linux Noob ?11 -
People complaining about heat and the hottest day of the year. They are saying that this is the hottest summer that they have experienced in 10 years.
One intelligent person: This is the coolest summer that you will experience for the next 10 years.
P.S. didn't care about the environment and global warming that much but this shit hit hard.3 -
Started out reading "Standard C++ Bible" (~800 pages), who does that anyway? Throughly studied the language and at 14 years of age tried hard even grasping what the word polymorphism meant, realising 10 years later how much it gave me. Immensely grateful that C++ choose to rip my brain apart at that young age.
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What should be the salary expectation in Berlin Germany for a 10+ years experienced senior software engineer?7
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What is the point of reading books about architecture when all I get are some shitty apps written 5-10 years ago where I just have to make them operational... :(4
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Had to do something with Xcode for a while now. After 2 hours my tolerance for strange errors, which are solved with cleaning build folder or closing/re-opening the IDE, is used up for the next 10 years...
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Started a new job. Saas solution 10 years old. Not a single page of documentation....... Spent last three days trying to find code connections. #nodocumentation #y-u-no-doc2
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At my company they have this legacy system that's been around for a good 10 years now. The company told me they plan to break away from the legacy system, and this was 2 years ago. The reason that nothing has changed is because anyone that knows the legacy system have already left, and there's one service that relies on it. That team absolutely refuses to break away from it so everyone is stuck where they are. Given the attitude of the company employees, I'm pretty sure this legacy system will be around for another 10 years.
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eva viva3. very specific german healthcare erp. bloated but with the false features, insufficient data dumping, expensive, bad service. needs a lot of devops workarounds. unfortunately you don't skip easily with 10+ years of customer data.
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Competitiveness in technology. 10 to 15 years ago, a handful of companies controlled how the world would develop software (fuck you Oracle and IBM). Now there is a lot less monopoly.1
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I just though to myself... “I’d pay $10 a month for a verified ‘age’ filter for posts.” I guess, sometimes I’d like to know the person fire-storming me isn’t 14 years old. Just for like - an hour here or there. Unusual. Maybe I just turned “old.”
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2019 and wifi still not work with Windows 10. Laptop is supported with Windows 10. So why it's not working like it should. I don't know why but Windows 10 and wifi is kinda common problem for me. I remember last time I had similar problems with Linux, it was like 10 years ago.4
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Worst idea of my life, which I thought was awesome back then: Create our flagship application in Delphi 10 years ago ... D:
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