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Search - "what-is-a-feature"
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1. The quality of the coffee and toilet paper you encounter during an interview tells you more than promises about table tennis or fruit baskets.
2. Try to determine who their primary client is: subscribers, app buyers, advertisers, etc. It's a major influence on the company dynamic.
3. Before an interview, you can just say: "I would like to sit down with a PO and run through one backlog feature and one bug, to get a feel for the type of tasks at the company". Such an activity immediately reveals team structure, whether they have product owners & scrum masters, what a sprint looks like, how they prioritize tasks, and how organized/chaotic your work experience will be.16 -
EDIT: devRant April Fools joke (2019)
-------------------------
Hey everyone!
Today, @trogus and I are very happy to announce a devRant feature that we’ve been working on for many months. After extensive time and money investment, it’s finally here! Introducing, pixelated avatars!
@trogus came up with this awesome idea about a year ago, but we couldn’t get it just right so we had to tons of work/research to make those pixelated avatars give the full sense of retro and ULTIMATE pixelation. We think everyone will appreciate how this effort turned out.
Anyway, let us know what you think, and we hope you enjoy!
p.s. here is @trogus’s avatar - the model we used to make sure the feature is perfect!51 -
Boss throwing up a huge source code that I didn't see before.
Boss: Hey, this is an app from a contractor to do XYZ.
Me: Oh, okay.. so?
Boss: You will continue the code and the maintenance now. How much time do you need to implement X feature?
Me: I need to see the code first, can't say nothing now.
Boss: ok I need estimation now.
Me: *getting nervous* I need to see the fuckening code first. if you want estimation now I would say one year..
Boss: what?
Me: what?18 -
I was newly hired to company. A customer came in yelling saying "there's a bug, this should do this but it's doing that..."
PM came to me and told me to "urgently fix this as this is an important customer".
So I started debugging for hours and asking around and all follow devs agreed that this is a bug. Then I found it!! And it was clear that it was not doing what the customer wanted.
I decided to look through this code history and found out that this part of the code wasn't changed for a year but the code commited before it did actually what the customer was expecting (whaaaa....)
Gathered the devs and the PM showing them what I found. They all looked at each other and then one said "ouuhhh right...yes it was doing this but we changed it to that..."
Turns out it's a feature not a bug, and everyone forgot about it.
FML8 -
How my birthday is going so far:
1. Dropped coffee on my shirt
2. Client is wondering why we removed a feature that he wants yet asked us to remove a week ago
3. Dev server is no longer working
4. Internet connection is shit
5. My VPN keeps on disconnecting (see #4)
Is this day going to end or what?53 -
GUESS WHAT? HE WANTS ANOTHER FUCKING FEATURE!
AND WHEN I SAID I DIDN’T HAVE TIME BECAUSE CODE-COMPLETE IS TOMORROW, HE SAID HE’LL PUNT IT TO NEXT YEAR INSTEAD OF RELEASING IT THIS WEEK SO I CAN “BUILD IT RIGHT.” MAN, FUCK YOU AND YOUR ENDLESS CHANGES!
THIS WAS GOING TO BE A TWO WEEK TICKET UNTIL HE STARTED ADDING ENDLESS FEATURES AND CHANGES AND SURPRISES. IT’S BEEN FUCKING MONTHS! I AM SICK OF THIS SHIT!
ANSDFKAWHOALIKWEGJFADIO;UGJT;
There goes my Q4 performance review.
> “Accomplishments? Oh, there’s lots of room here. Accomplished: Basically nothing. How embarrassing.”
Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate20 -
Something that I'm utterly ashamed of.
Had to add text message and call communication functionality in one of the products.
Boss shrunk the deadline to two days ETA.
Didn't know jackshit about twilio.
Meeting with client:
Client - So the communication thing is done right?
Me - Yyeahhh
Client - Let's try it then. *Calls himself*
Me - *Calls the API directly from my phone*
Client got out happy. Nobody knows what actually happened there. I didn't even talk to my colleagues about this. Boss gave me bonus to pull of the impossible. I added the feature after a week of the incident.8 -
FOR FUCK SAKE DO PEOPLE THINK BEFORE POSTING!!!
I got a 3 star review on my app and the user said if I implement feature x he will give me 5 stars, what is even more funny is he is requesting it for free!!
I hate this fucked up miserable world -.-28 -
I have this one major pet peeve - getting interrupted on any messenger by "hey".
Q: Hey
A: Hey, what's up?
-minutes pass, I try to resume work-
Q: Do you have a second?
A: Sure, what's up?
-minutes pass, I try to resume work... Again-
Q: Do you know anything about #feature#?
A: Yeah, I wrote most of it, what do you need?
-minutes pass, I try to resume work... AGAIN-
(goes on same pattern, takes half an hour for a 10 second question/answer)
Like... Come on!!! Don't do this to me
I get it, I like to be cordial and friendly - but there is absolutely nothing stopping you from getting your message across without making me have to go back and forth (interrupting my work).9 -
Dev submitting PR: “Testing instructions: Self explanatory”
Dev reviewing PR: You need to be a bit more verbose than that.
Dev submitting PR: “Testing instruction: Feature should work as expected”
Dev reviewing PR: *sigh*… Feature doesn’t work as expected
Dev submitting PR: WHAT IS NOT WORKING AS EXPECTED??? I NEED MORE DETAIL THAN THAT!!
Dev reviewing PR: …….So do I you muppet5 -
!rant
!!git
Who here uses `master` for development?
My boss (api guy) tried to convince me that was normal practice. I gently told him that it sounded crazy and very very bad.
Here's the dev path I'm enforcing on my repos:
(feature branches) -> dev -> qa* -> master -> production*
*: the build server auto-pulls from these branches, and pushes any passing builds to staging/production.
Everyone works on their own feature branches, and when they're happy with their work, they merge it into `dev`. `dev`, therefore, is for feature integration testing. After everything is working well on `dev`, it gets merged into `qa` for the testers to fawn over and beat with sticks. Anything that passes QA gets merged into `master`, where it sits until we're ready to release it. When that time comes (it's usually right away, but not always), `master` gets merged into `production`.
This way, `master` is always stable and contains the newest code, so it's perfect for forking/etc. Is this standard practice, or should I be doing something different?
Also, api guy encourages something he calls "running a racetrack" -- each dev has their own branch (their initials) and they push to that throughout the day. everyone else pulls from it regularly and pushes to their own branch. When anyone's happy with their code, they push from their (updated) branch to `qa` (I insisted on `dev` instead.)
Supposedly this drastically reduces the number of merge conflicts when pushing to an upstream branch due to having a more recent ancestor node?
I don't quite follow that, but it seems to me that merging/pushing throughout the day would just make them happen sooner? idk.
What are your thoughts?30 -
When i said i'll deliver a feature by end of the day, they thought it after 5. But what i really mean is 11.59pm9
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Product sending an email: Can I confirm feature A is all set for its release on April 30th?
Me: ... what? no that feature is going out with Feature B, that was pushed back to June because of the server issue.
Product: No, the release plan document says April 30th for this.
Me: ... theres 6 copies of this doc now. Someone is after deleting my comments saying "releasing with Feature B". Oh look heres a link to another doc that says this. See Feb14th "Will go out with Feature B". This is because they are touching the same code, we can't separate them now without re-writing it.
*Me to myself*: Ha product are going to hate this, their shitty processes have finally caught up with them.
*next day*
Other manager: So heres my plan for the app release x, y, z.
*Me to myself*: ... his plan? this is my app, I mange this. What the hell is this?
*reads email thread*
*Me to myself*: ... oh so product really didn't like my reply, took me off the thread, sent a response to all the other managers asking for alternatives, CC'ing upper management. The same upper management I had a private conversation with yesterday about how shit our product team are.
*cracks knuckles*
I'm going to enjoy writing this reply.12 -
Client: "I need you to implement a feature which does x"
Me: "We can it do like this, I can do it in Y hours."
Client: "Perfect do it"
Me: "Here you go have a look and if you give your ok I'll implement it on production."
Client:"That is not what I need. I need Z"
Me: "Well then you should have said Z and not x. But I can do Z if you want me to."
Client:"Do it it is urgent!!!!111"
Me: "All done here you go."
Client: "That works like what I said what I need, but I meant more like xZ."
Me: "Ok, you know I have to charge you for all this, do you?"
Client: "What why? It isn't the feature I wanted!!11 Do it right and I'll pay you for the right one!"
Me: "It might not be what you wanted but it is exactly what you specified to me. I'll send you the bill and will not continue working for you. Good luck finding someone who is willing to do unpaid work for you."
I am so done with that kind of client.8 -
YouTube: you want 3 months of free YouTube premium? YouTube originals!!!
*Closes YouTube app and returns to Yatse to control my Kodi installation*
*Returns back to the YouTube app*
YouTube: oh, did you ever wish that you could play videos in the background?!
FUCK NO!!! I've got NewPipe and youtube-dl for that!!! The latter even combines nicely with my BlackPlayer EX!!!
Open source is amazing. The ability to just say no to those profiteering gluttons because you already have what they're offering as a "premium feature". Fucking awesome!9 -
---- Startup RantLife ----
A senior developer joined the team, let's name him Bob, and this guy is really good no doubts about that.
He made suggestions, some improvements, but Bob is always waving his hands and says out loud that some part of the code base is really really bad.
I kept quiet until one day I had to pair with Bob to check a feature. Guess what happened, as usual, Bob clenched his fist and start pointing that this code is super ugly.
So let's check the history of changes and boom, Bob was the main writer.
That moment, I was completely silent, trying not to smile as Bob came up with an excuse, he never admits that he is wrong, now he needs a scapegoat and he starts blaming the process, the planning...
I believe that being humble and saying sorry is a quality that it requires time to develop.
So don't be like Bob, please :)12 -
PM in daily: your turn. what have you done yesterday?
me: so i finished my PR for feature x and now i'm only waiting for review feedback there, so i can close this ticket today if no major rework is required-
PM: this is not what i asked, i don't want to know what you did, i want to know what was done.
me: uhh... okay, also i started working on task x
[note: task x, a task per definition involving a large amount of research, was very coarsly defined and it wasn't even clear to the PM what he exactly expects from me, and we agreed that the scope needs to be refined in the process],
so as a first step, i started doing some general investigations to get an overview of the topic and learn about concepts a and b-
PM: again, i don't want to know what you did, i want to know what was done.
me: okay well, i have DONE basic research on topic xy and collected information-
PM: this still does not answer my question, what's the deliverable?
me: ...so uhhh.... i read papers? i researched info online and collected and prepared information and links in a presentation which i'm also planning to present to the team-
PM: okay, can you please split your jira task in subtasks so everyone knows exactly what you're working on? otherwise we have no idea what you're doing.
for fuck's sake, shut up. just shut up22 -
My biggest pet peeve at the moment is people without any development experience using version numbers.
Me: "Communicating a release date for the feature towards clients is dangerous, we have a developer shortage, and currently don't really have enough capacity to..."
Manager: "What we release next month doesn't have to be perfect, it is just a v1"
Me: "You mean it's a beta? If that's the case, could you maybe differentiate the requirements of the beta, let's call it a 0.1.0, versus the 1.0.0-rc, the release candidate?"
*Feature is eventually merged into production, barely in a beta state*
Manager: "So I have some ideas for the v2"
Me: "You mean 1.0.0"
Manager: "Let's compromise and call it v1.5"
Me: "Let's compromise, you stop communicating release dates, AND you stop using version numbers..."
Manager: "That's not a compromise..."
Me: "...I wasn't finished... And I won't respond to the recruiter who just offered me a better paying job"5 -
Saturday late night wisdom.
Software developers you need to work on communication skills.
Everytime LinkedIn says need a problem solver. It means a guy who can understand what non technical guy is asking for and translate that to a software or at least come up with a example of why he is wrong. Explain them. They are not dumb fellows for asking that feature. You might think the feature is stupid. Don't assume this. Sit with them. Understand thier user flow, understand the frustration your software is causing them. Then you'll see why are asking for that X feature.
Every feature request made is basically my opportunity of understanding of product. Don't wait for users to tell you requirements. Understand and suggest, implement prototypes and show them, a causal question such as "Hey would you think providing a keyboard shortcut for this submission is great?"
Understand our job is not just to write software.
Our job is to solve thier problems using software knowledge.
Don't you agree ?4 -
"Hey, about that matter from yesterday..."
"Yes, what about that?"
"We need to talk about that again! How often do you trigger that system?"
"Once."
"You sure?"
"Yes, but i can check it, if you like."
*find references*
"See, only once."
"Can it happen at a random point later one?"
"No."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes"
"Can you check it?"
"Okay."
*shows code"
"Look here, as you can see, it will not happen at other times."
"Do you have an idea why it could happen anyway?"
"Maybe that system does the action without my software telling it to do so, wasn't that specified that way?"
"Yes, but it normally does that roughly 10 seconds after you give the command the first time, so we thought maybe you could say what makes it do the action at other points maybe."
"Did you check that systems sourcecode?"
"No not yet. But did that happen with the older version?"
"No. But we didn't try."
"Did you change something between the versions?"
"Yes, the new feature."
"Could that make a change in behaviour?"
"I don't see how."
"Can you remove that feature for test?"
"We can take the old version."
"No, we need the new version, but without the feature you added."
"That IS the old version, there is no other difference!"
"Are you sure?"
"Would you like to see it in source control?"
"No, ~ okay. What do you think causes the problem?"
"I haven't had any new ideas since we talked yesterday."
"Okay. Mhhh,...okay. Lets talk again later."
YES SURE! BRING IT ON! I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT! PLEASE COME BY OR CALL ME AGAIN! AND BRING THE BOSS WITH YOU, TO SHOW HOW SERIOUS THE MATTER IS! LET ME TELL HIM THE STUFF I TOLD SEVEN TIMES LAST WEEK!2 -
aslkfjasf. i've spent 12 hours today (and lots more over the past two days) trying to reproduce a bug that my [sort of] coworker insists is present. I haven't seen any proof of it anywhere, let alone steps to reproduce it.
I've poured through the code, following all of its tangled noodles of madness from start to fuck-this-shit. I've read and reread the pile of demon excrement so many times i can still read the code when i close my eyes. so. not. kidding.
anyway, the coworker person is getting mad because i haven't fixed the bug after days, and haven't even reproduced it yet. This feature is already taking way too fucking long so I totally don't blame him. but urghh it's like trying to unwind a string someone tied into a tight little ball of knots because they were bored.
but i just figured out why I haven't been able to reproduce it.
the stupid fucking unreliable dipshit ex-"i'm a rockstar and my code rocks"-CTO buffoon (aka API Guy, aka the `a=b if a!=b`loody pointless waste of mixed spaces and tabs) that wrote the original APIs ... 'kay, i need to stop for breath.
The dumbfuck wrote the APIs (which I based the new ones on mostly wholesale because wtf messy?), but he never implemented a very fucking important feature for a specific merchant type. It works for literally every type except the (soon-to-be) most common one. and it just so happens that i need that very specific feature to reproduce this bug.
Why is that one specific merchant type handled so differently? No fucking idea.
But exactly how they're handled differently is why I'm so fking pissed off. It's his error checking. (Some) of his functions return different object types (hash, database object, string, nullable bool, ...) depending on what happened. like, when creating a new gift, it (eventually...) either returns a new Gift object or a string error basically saying "ahhh everything's broken again!" -- which is never displayed, compared against, or recorded anywhere, ofc. Here, the API expects a Hash. That particular function call *always* returns a Hash, no matter what happens in the myriad, twisting, and interwoven branches the code could take. So the check is completely pointless.
EXCEPT. if an object associated with another object associated with the passed object (yep) has a type of 8. in which case, one of the methods in the chain returns a PrintQueue that gets passed back up the call stack. implicitly, and nested three levels in. ofc.
And if the API doesn't get its precious Hash, it exclaims that the merchant itself is broken, and tells the user to contact support. despite, you know, the PrintQueue showing that everything worked perfectly. In fact, that merchant's printer will be happily printing away in the background.
All because type checking is this guy's preferred method of detecting errors. (Raise? what's that? OOP? Nah, let's do diverging splintered-monolithic with some Ruby objects thrown in.)
just.
what the crap.
people should keep their mental diarrhea away from their keyboards.
Anyway. the summary of this long-winded, exhaustion-fueled tirade is that our second-most-loved feature doesn't work on our second-most-common merchant type.
and ofc that was the type of merchant i've been testing on. for days. while having both a [semi] coworker and my boss growing increasingly angry at me for my lack of progress.
It's also a huge feature, and the boss doesn't understand that. (can't or won't, idk)
So.
yep.
that's been my week.
...... WHAT A FUCKING BUFFOON!rant sheogorath's spaghetti erroneous error management vomit on her sweater already your face is an anti-pattern dipshit api guy two types bad four types good root swears oh my3 -
So where to start... Let me preface this by saying I am a Software Architect for C# and do 99% dotnet development.
I just received a phone call from our Director of Development asking me to look at adding a feature for SSO with our companies main development project, which is written in PHP. I hope I made the correct changes but since I am not a PHP dev... I am not 100% confident in my code.
Now I am writing this as we are making the deployment Friday, December 29, 2017 at 5:00 pm. I should add that I am going on vacation for the next week.
So let me summarize... I am not a PHP developer, the non-PHP developer is making PHP changes on a Friday Night, and before a long weekend and before going on vacation.
I would like to point out that I said I was not 100% comfortable with this... but well this is what they wanted. I am not even sure what really to say about this though.6 -
"Please add a feature to check the user's internet connection before the application starts."
-- THIS IS A GOD DAMN WEB APPLICATION, YOU DUMB MORONS! Maybe I should add a feature next that checks for the user's computer being turned on or what? How about making sure the application isn't run when the power is out?!
Jesus fuck.14 -
Devs: Feature A is done! Faster than planned even.
Manager: Hmm... what about feature A+B?
Devs: That requires feature B, and you said that feature B was not as important as feature A during our last meeting, remember? So we planned to do A, B, and then A+B. It's there in the meeting minutes.
Manager: But feature A does not make sense without feature A+B. Let's not release feature A just yet until we have feature A+B.
Then why didn't you say so during our last meeting?!9 -
Start a new job.
It is amazing.
What, you will not pay my JetBrains? Ugh... cheap boss.
Do you call this scrum?
Now I need to build this dumbass feature.
Wait, all the seasoned people are leaving?
Why did I choose this place at first?
Linkedin.
Interview.
This sounds awesome.
Good salary.
Bye guys.
Start a new job...8 -
Always the same story:
Marketing: hey I'm gonna do a demo to a customer. They were asking for feature XYZ. That's ready on thr staging server right? Do you think I could use the staging server for the demo?
Devs: well feature XYZ is not 100% done. Basically just feature X is done, and it still has a few bugs. The deadline ain't for another month, since we gotta finish ABC first. I guess you could use the staging, but it has a lot of bugs.
Marketing: perfect!
*after presentation*
Marketing: the staging had so many bugs! Why didn't you tell me?! It was so embarrassing showing it to new customers! Anyway, they loved the new feature. We need it to be ready ASAP.
Devs: What?! That's gonna mess up with our schedule. You know what? Fine, but feature ABC will have to wait another month.
Marketing: Well, it'd be ideal if we could do both...
Devs: Pay for more devs or dor extra hours.
Marketing: Just do XYZ. It's a pity that you'll have to push back ABC but it's fine, XYZ is more important.
(I might ask, if it was so important, why didn't you notice so in the meeting where we had decided that ABC would be prioritized?)
*tons of working hours later*
Devs: There, we finished XYZ.
Marketing: Yay! Wow, this month we'll have two major features done: ABC and XYZ!
Devs: No, ABC is not done yet.
Marketing: What? But the deadline was this week.
Devs: It was, but then you decided to prioritize XYZ and we said we had to push back ABC to get XYZ ready, and you agreed.
Marketing: Did we? Fine. But do it quick.
Marketing and their mood swings.5 -
Boss: Have you finished that feature?
Me: Almost there, i'm refactoring some classes...
Boss: What? Refactor? But thisnis a new feature, it does not need refactor! We don't have time for this!
Me: 😵🔫
This is what happen when you care about code quality.5 -
Hello again devRanters! This is linuxxx again. A quick update regarding the privacy site!
Right now we're up to the following:
Ewpratten
- Converting what we have right now on frontend to Bootstrap.
- Working on a page with a description as to what this is going to be exactly.
linuxxx (me)
- Converted the static stuff we used before to a simple MVC based PHP web application.
- Created a DB scheme for the custom CMS I am going to write for this.
- Starting to work on the custom CMS right now!
We'll update as soon as we've got a well working description/introduction page :)
We won't be creating rants every day/new tiny feature/change or anything but as this is our first productive night, it seemed like a nice idea to update what we already got done/started on :).
Stay tuned!26 -
Client: "I did not receive the email that should be send after that event. Please fix."
Me:
* Checks code - ok
* Tests feature in locally - ok
* Tests feature in production - ok
* checks values in database - ok
* 2 hours wasted - ok
"Please help me dear CTO, idk what else I could check or how I should even respond to this."
CTO: "hmm, the clients account uses a adminstrative email address for testing. Let me just check if it is in the mailbox."
*checks* "Yeah, that's the email you're looking for, right?"
Me: *experiences relief, anger, blood lust and disappointment at the same time* "Could you please respond to the client for me, I need a break. Thanks"3 -
Apparently, part of being a software engineer means knowing how to read minds and do other people's jobs.
While implementing a user story for marketing, we found some associated features that, according to the database, have not been used for years. We tell them this. We do the courtesy of asking, "Hey, is there anything on the site that is utilizing these features? We'd like to clean up the DB."
"We don't know."
Engineering suggests, "Ok, lets turn the feature off, then, and see if anyone complains. It's been years according to the DB."
Marketing gets angry and hostile and says, "That's not the way to do things!"
I don't vocalize, "Well, not knowing how to do your own damned job is not the way to do things."
-
Marketing asks us to integrate a third party feature to the site. We ask, "Ok, what page do you want it on, and what information do you want to collect, and what should it look like?"
"I don't know. You're engineering. You tell us."
We implement it as best we can.
Marketing says, "HEY! This isn't done right! It's missing this and this and this!"
"Did you ask us to implement that? According to the user story, it passes acceptance criteria."
Marketing says, "I thought you would just know that! I didn't know it was a separate thing. Just put it on all the pages, then. You guys really should know the site better."
Engineering gets angry and hostile
-
Marketing says, "We need this removed from the site."
Engineering replies, "We have a GUI for that. Just go to this URL and you can do it yourself."
Marketing replies, "Well, if that's a really complicated thing, can you just run a script against the DB?"
Engineering says, "If we've built a UI for you, we really shouldn't be executing SQL scripts directly against the DB."
Marketing gets angry and hostile.
-
Engineering tries asking nicely.
"Marketing, if you want us to add new stuff to the site, or change stuff, please tell us what it is and where it should go and what the customer experience should be like."
Marketing replies, "We don't know the site that well. We are leaning on you to tell us."
I do not vocalize, all while trying to keep my eyes from bulging out of my head, my face red with rage, "YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF SELLING SHIT ON A WEBSITE THAT YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT. YOU ARE ASKING FOR CHANGES TO SOMETHING YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?"
Engineering is angry and hostile.3 -
#feature request
Anonymous rants!
Let me explain, many people here have chosen meaningless usernames to them, to be completely anonymous, many others didn't... For example if you Google Etrunon I guess that you'll find me in less than 5 minutes...
So I believe that this may lead to less and less hateful, frustrated and liberating rants. Mainly because of three reasons: fear to be discovered from the outside(boss, etc) , fear to be discovered inside (colleagues or friends invited here) and the latter is the community building aspect of this app.
So what I am asking (knowing that should be a lot eheh) is the capability to post new rants either signed or anonymous... This to prevent being discovered let us having rewarding rants to read while on the same hand being able to connect and getting in touch a little bit with each other :)
What do you think?
@dfox @trogus10 -
I'll buy an oar.
Not a boat with two of them, just an oar.
And slap every idiot who comes near to me again trying to convince me how Apple products are innovative. Every feature mentioned I had on my phone at least for 5years. And if not on my phone, Nexus or another Samsung had it already for a long time. Hell, Samsungs even started exploding sooner!
What is it with those Apple snowflakes trying to be something special? Yes you are special! You piss me of in a matter of nanoseconds.7 -
ESTIMATING FUCKING HOURS.
Well not literally, that only takes 10 minutes.
But software estimation... anyone pretending to be good at it is a dirty liar. Adding a button? Uh, let's say 2 hours, I mean I gotta poop in between as well, and it's probably some broken bootstrap theme with hacked custom margins.
Building a commenting system coupled to an ancient CRM? Uh... maybe one day? Maybe a month? I don't even know what the CRMs looks like? You won't show me because "that's irrelevant"?
WELL THEN I DON'T FUCKING HAVE A CLUE.
And in the time we spent on discussing time estimations, I could have written like half of the feature... or zero... because you still haven't fucking shown me what the CRM API looks like.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'LL GIVE YOU AN ESTIMATION. ME. VACATION. DONE IN 6 WEEKS.6 -
Absolute asshat level clownly clownshipness:
Manager: Why is this like this? 🤡
fullStackClown: ...Because you defined the feature like this.
Manager: Hmmmmm ok... what about this? Why is this like this? 🤡
fullStackClown: ...Because you defined the feature like this.
Manager: Hmmmmm ok... and then this thing here? Why is this like this? 🤡
fullStackClown: Well, I hate to tell you, but it's a huge surprise. Guess what?! BECAUSE YOU DEFINED THE FEATURE LIKE THIS!!!
Manager: ... 🤡
fullStackClown: Any other absolute asinine questions to ask me to continue breaking me from flow?
Manager: ... 🤡
fullStackClown: ...
To those interested, I believe there is an evolution of my devRant career in order... I'm passing the clown phase... and entering the full-on circus phase...9 -
Client : can you add a calling feature to our android app?
Me : Ok.
*** after updating the app ****
Client : what is this **** dialog (calling permission request for android)!
Users are complaining about it and refuse to use the app!!! Don't you know I can get into legal problems with this???
Me :But you just asked for this feature?
Client : I want this feature but remove the dialog.
Me : you can't that's not how google works.
Client : I don't care do something remove the dialog or edit it but keep the feature.
Me : 😑😑😑😑 nvm I'll figure out something.
Ended up with copying the number to the dial screen instead of direct call from the app.7 -
- PM : we have no choice but to finish this before deadline.
- Me : We can't, it's a really big feature.
- PM : But we have no choice.
- Me : But we can't.
...
*What is she waiting for*12 -
Dear Managers,
This is not efficient:
Boss: * calls *
Me: * answers *
B: there's a bug in feature ABC! The form doesn't work!
M: ABC uses a lot of forms. Is it Form A, B, or C?
B: Umm... let's just go on a Zoom call!
* 5 minutes trying to set up a Zoom call *
* 3 more minutes trying to find the form *
B: This form in here.
M: It works fine for me. What data are you inputting?
B: * takes 5 minutes trying to reproduce the bug * (in the meantime, the call is basically an awkward silence)
You spent 5 minutes wasting both of our times trying to set up a Zoom meeting, and another 8 wasting MY tine trying to find the bug.
This is efficient:
B: There is a bug in form C. If I try to upload this data, it malfunctions.
M: Thank you. I'll look into it.
You saved me 8 minutes of staring at a screen and saved us both another 5 minutes of setting up a meeting.6 -
During a company wide status meeting where all product managers, architects and directors assemble:
Me: *A product architect leading a team of devs*
Directors: So are there any issues or risks you see in delivering the next build in target time for Client 1?
Me: There are too many changes in feature requirements. First they said we can use a shared NFS for storage. Now they are asking to switch over to SFTP pull mode.. blah blah..
Directors: Oh I see.. well we can support both solutions then.
Me: But the deadlin..
Directors: *ignores what I say* Will be a good marketing point for future.
Me: But there are too many regressions in integra..
Directors: *ignores what I say* We should also meet deadlines. That is the most important thing.
Me: Its not as easy as 1+1=2.. The team needs more time to..
Directors: *ignores what I say* Ok lets move on to the next point. What about Client 2?
Me:4 -
FUCKING FUCK! THE TEAM LEAD WANTS ME TO MAKE AN UNNECESSARY UPDATE, AND IN THAT TOO HE WANTS TO IMPLEMENT A HALF ASSED FEATURE. Upon telling him what it takes(which he doesn't understand shit about cuz he's not from webdev background and has the level of experience that I had when I was midway my first webdev book), not to mention that he hasn't even seen the code of the project I've worked upon, which I got from an intern they fired last year cuz of not working and shitting around everywhere in the code(I asked if we could start afresh and he says that it'll take too much time - guess what, it took us two extra weeks already cuz of that and half of our required features can't be implemented cuz the code is beyond any hope), he tells me that "The client won't need this feature, but we're thinking of more and more features to provide (WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK).
Okay, you wanna sell your product; fine. I suggested that if we're letting the client select the time stamp on the initial date, then we should let him select the time stamp on the ending date too, right?
"No, we'll not provide this feature" ARE YOU FUCKING BONKERS?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM WITH YOU?!?!
I'll have to make major breaking changes in the code, for which I'm not the only one working on. Great.
This, coupled with the fact that he speaks unbelievably slow and it's so irritating cuz he repeats himself thrice.
What happens(has already happened), when he'll show this to the seniors, he'll say that this is either unnecessary/will suggest a major change, which WOULD HAVE BEEN MUCH FUCKING BETTER IF TOLD BEFORE I START WITH THE CHANGE, YOU FUCKING CUNTS
I thought this would be fun. Well fuck me.2 -
Boss insisted that verification link needs to be clicked from same IP address as account registration. Many arguments later, decision is final, we will ignore the numerous ways that this will be a burden to our users.
*Code code, test test, deploy*
We're getting a lot of traffic, we need this bitch to scale! *auto-scale and load balance all the things*
Account creation begins breaking at random, some people receiving the "Your IP address doesn't match" error. Look at login history table, what the shit... All recent logins coming from internal IP addressohfuckmylife need to look at X-Forwarded-For header for actual IP behind load balancer.
IP address matching feature stays. I am sad, drink away sadness.4 -
How can you tell if someone's a node.js coder?
Don't worry they'll tell you.
What do I dislike about node.js?
The fanboys.
Seriously you guys need to chill out. Your language is not the end of all other languages. It isn't going to replace PHP or Python or Ruby. It's not going to be the only thing around in 4 years.
I'm not a fan of JavaScript, I just don't like the language. I don't care about all the advantages and the other bs you're shouting about. If I want that feature I'm sure I can find a way to get it in my language.
Now shoo fly you're bothering me11 -
Manager: I don’t understand what is so complicated about this feature. Under a certain set of conditions do one thing, under a separate set of conditions do another. It’s just an if else statement! Those take seconds to write!
Dev: The problem is the memory required to calculate the conditions is quite cumbersome
Manager: Well then find a faster way! It’s just an if else!
Dev: …11 -
How the fuck am I expected to salvage a fucking project that has been handed down to me with.
- No fucking clear architecture
- No fucking documentation
- Fucking shitty ass code base with no fucking coding standards
- The previous team was fucking learning a whole fucking new technology stack *Not fucking kidding* making fucking mistakes left and right
- No code reviews
- Mixing fucking local and cloud enviroment together
- No fucking testing
- Feature that were supposed to be implemented and are not working
- No configuration all the stuff are hard coded
- Full responsiblity for the whole stack
- Only one other guy with me
- And this fucking project has been delayed for a year
- MUCH FUCKING MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM
Like what the fuck am I expected to do? I took the job thinking that people knew what the fuck they were doing and surprise surprise that was a fucking bust.
the problem is also I am the junior and these fucking people have more experience than me, what the fuck happened to over seeing people's work, PM doesnt give a shit, developers dont give a shit nobody gives a shit.
But when I got this surprise surprise now everyone is interested in finishing the project
BULLSHIT11 -
Had 4-5 hours of sleep last night because I had to wake up early this morning for an internal demo of the feature I worked on. It was scheduled early morning because the boss was busy.
I come to the office looking like a zombie, practically sleep walking my way to the office, and guess what... The app server is down! Yay.
I had to reschedule it to right in the middle of lunch time because hey... The boss is busy. Now everyone in the team hates me for ruining their lunch.
Now I'm sitting here, staring at my code, remembering the sweet luxury of sleep.2 -
Manager: Here's the design for the next feature, we're ready to hand it over to the consultant
FullStackClown: Uh... okay... is it spec'd out with requirements?
Manager: Huh?
FullStackClown: Well, already look at this design and user flow, did you consider what happens when <insert edge case X here>, <insert edge case Y here>, or <insert edge case Z here>? How is the consultant going to know what to put in for business logic if you don't even know or define it yourself?
Manager: Huh?
FullStackClown: Sigh... yeah, I'm too busy right now to be a kindergarten teacher, come back in a few days once you understand how your own feature is supposed to work
Manager: ...
Dev: ...5 -
Customer: (calls emergency hotline) We have a really bad bug!
Rep: What seams to be the issue?
Customer: I need to talk to Sam, he knows what to do, tell him it's urgent.
Rep: can I tell Sam what the issue is?
Customer: Well, Sam built a newsletter program but I don't have a way to import mass amounts of emails addresses.
Rep: That sounds like a feature, not a problem.
Customer: why wouldn't it do that? Would you build a car without a steering wheel?
Rep: I am not sure that's relevant to the problem.
Customer: what do you mean?
Rep: I would say it is more like, "would you build a car without a pair of jet skis attached to the back." And we would respond with, "we would be happy to add Jet Skis, but it's going to cost you additional money."
Customer: So, how are we going to fix this bug in YOUR software?
Rep: :/5 -
The code is a freaking mess. Shared behavior, terrible variable/method naming, misleading module naming, dynamic polymorphic spaghetti, whitespace errors, no consistency, confusing even if you understand what the code is doing, ... . It should never have passed code review. It probably wasn't code reviewed.
The comments are sparse and useless. Quality level: // This is bridge.
The documentation does not exist.
Testing steps for QA are missing several steps, including setup, so actually using the feature is bloody challenging. If one thing is wrong, the feature just doesn't show up (and ofc won't tell you why).
The specs for the feature are outdated and cover only 4 of 19+ cases. And are neigh useless for those 4.
The specs for the report I'm fixing don't even check the data on the report; it just checks for one bit of data on each row it creates -- a name -- which is also the same on each row. gg.
The object factories (for specs) are a mess, and often create objects indirectly, or in backwards order with odd post-create overwriting to make things work. Following the factories is a major chore, let alone fixing or extending them.
The new type has practically zero test coverage.
The factory for the new type also only creates one variant -- and does so incorrectly.
And to top it all off: the guy who wrote the feature barely ever responds. If he does, he uses fewer words than my bird knows, then stops responding. I've yet to get a useful answer out of him. (and he apparently communicates just fine, according to my micromanager.)
But "it's just fixing a report; it'll be easy!"
Oh, fuck off.8 -
Ticket: “feature [x] doesn’t work”
Me: “I’ll need more details: how do I reach feature [x]? In which of the three projects you assigned me is that?”
Manager: “the design is in the ticket”
Me, in my head: “can you effin listen to what I told you before giving air to your mouth?”
Me, in person: “yeah I just need to know which project this refers to and how to reach it”
Manager: “but you have to open the ticket as a separate page!”
Me: “sure!” *waits 15 min, opens a ticket for more details, assigns it to manager, flags as blocking, flags the other one as blocked*
5 mins later: details are given and I can proudly fox it by remembering the manager they have to login in order to see feature [x]
Later in the workweek:
Manager at 8:00 URGENT FEATURE! MUST BE DELIVERED BY EOD
Me, 10:00 “can jump on it, need authorisation for [a procedure]
Me, 11,12,13,15,16,17:30: pings for an answer
Manager, 17:58 “ah sorry didn’t see, we can do it tomorrow”
Is this the matrix? Am I being stopped from developing cause I am randomly accessing matrix’s code without knowing it? Is this the Truman show? And most importantly: can I please take part to a manager hiring session? I am curious to see how tf you hire such peculiar people.10 -
Favorite/most hated language? (I love a good flame war)
Why did you quit your previous job / Moment you've considered quitting your current job?
Why do you think Linux is so much better than OSX? (Ahh yes I feed on apple flavored hipster tears)
What side project are you currently working on?
If you had the best teams and unlimited funds, to be used only on a serious project using both Blockchain, IoT and AI, what would you create?
If you forgot how to code, what other career would you pursue?
What is your "I was so busy wondering if I could, that I forgot whether I should" concept/idea/project?
How many chicken eggs would fit inside the moon if it was hollow? (I like retarded interview questions)
If you started a startup, what unique perk would you offer your developer employees?
Do you under- or overengineer?
Most unnecessary feature you ever had to create?
Most necessary feature your boss/client denied to approve?15 -
Me: Right, its Monday, time for a fresh start. Things have been unbearable, but i've nowhere else to go just yet. I gotta just dig deep, ignore everything bad and just get it done, It's all about positivity right? Lets just ignore the little things and keep moving.
*My morning so far, 2 hours in*
Remote dev: (timezone 5 hours earlier than me) Hey so whats the plan for this quarter?
Me: ... I posted a big detailed plan in the group chat on Friday night so you wouldn't be delayed ... but anyway, lets just move on. I need you to work on A, B and C. A is just copying what Android has already done, for B one of the backend guys working next to you is doing this, he'll be able to help you. C is all documented in the ticket.
Remote dev: cool thanks.
Local dev: So I was just chatting with remote dev ... yeah he told me he has no idea what he's suppose to do.
Me: ..... Ok i'll book a video call with him in the morning. Can't do it right now.
==========
Remote dev: Hey i'm helping the BE team do some testing. I found a bug in Android. Homepage says theres no trips. But Offers screen says there is.
Me: Ok so just to confirm, The "available" offers screen has offers to accept, but the white notification on the homepage saying "You have X offers to accept" is not showing up?
Remote dev: Correct!
*debugging for 5 mins*
Remote dev: actually no, the "accepted" offers tab has offers, but the homepage says there are no upcoming offers to work on.
Me: ..... ok, thats very different ... but sure, let me have a look.
Me: Right so the BE are ... again ... sending down expired offers. Looks like the accepted tab isn't catching it and the homepage is.
Remote dev: Right i'll open a ticket for Android.
Me: ... and BE team.
Remote dev: why?
Me: ... because they once again have timezone issues. This keeps causing issues in random places. BE need to fix this everywhere.
Remote dev: right, i'll chat to them and see if they can fix it.
==========
Product: So this ticket xxxxx is clear right?
Me: eh, kind of, so you want us to add feature X to user type A?
Product: correct.
Me: right but I don't see anywhere talking about the time it will take to build the screen for feature X
Product: What do you mean the screen?
Me: ... well, feature X is only accessible on screen Y ... we would have to change screen Y to support user type A ... you know ... so they can ... use the feature
Product: .... hhhhmmm .... i suppose you are right. Well we can't just add screen Y, we'll have to add W and Z, it won't make sense without them.
Me: ... ok sure, but our estimates put us over for this quarter. I don't think we can just add in 3 screens.
Product: No this is a must have.
Me: Ok so we'll have to drop something else.
Product: hhhmmm, don't think we can ... let me get back to you.
==========
Backend team invited me to a meeting at 6am my time on Friday.
==========
... 2 hours into Monday ... there must be vodka around here somewhere -
"Shouldn't be a problem. I can get <insert new feature here> implemented by <insert wildly optimistic time>. "
What is wrong with me?! Why do I keep doing this!?2 -
Casual workday be like:
Project manager: It is important we deliver these features.
Me & Coworker: Sounds reasonable, here is how long we need, roughly.
Mgr: Well, the deadline is already set and the contract is signed and written.
M&C: Ummm...
Mgr: Also, while we are hosting the application, we are not paid for operational cost, so make sure to optimise the crap out of it immediatly. Preferably while developing the features.
(A wild architect appears): Also everything has to be built on cans and kubernuts, with rectangular ui and bootstyling and with these internally developed backend frameworks NOBODY tests. Coroporate policy you know.
(A wilder division CEO appears on meeting): Also we are rolling out code KPI's across the organisation. Everyone is expected to Focus on documentation, test coverage and there is now mandatory SonarQube scanning of repos. ZERO DEFECTS PEOPLE
M&C: ...
(Wildest Salesteam appears): By the way we sold the application to these other customers, they love feature XYZ and must have it.
M&C: It does not have feature XYZ
Mgr: It will have feature XYZ
M&C: Allright so with all the extra funding from the sales, we need to hire atleast one Machine learning guy, an extra frontend specialist a developer and maybe funnel some of the funding into slacking the operational budget in the start.
Animated Suit *Railing a line of coke from his gold plated ihpone 15*: What funding? Get to work. Also your havent been super sharp with your time registration.2 -
Sales: "There is a problem in complicated feature A, in a client system!
Dev: "What is the problem"
Sales: "I don't know exactly"
Dev: "which client system? What version is installed?"
Sales: crickets.
Dev: "Do you a Jira ticket, or an email with more details?"
Sales: "It is urgent that we fix the problem ASAP!"
Dev: "what problem"
Sales: "The problem! I talked to the VP RnD, So he can make sure you are on it!"
Dev: "What exactly do you me to fix"
Sales: "The Problem!"8 -
Even though I haven't had such an experience yet, I can assume that this is what every dev sees when he lets the client play with a new feature
-
I've been working on implementing a fairly large feature on a project at work--
**Sorry. I should rephrase that**
I've been *trying* to work on implementing a fairly large feature on a project at work.
It's slightly complicated because I'm not as "in the know" with the project as I should be. I get tossed around projects a lot as the only designer+developer so I've got my hands in a lot of buckets... Or git repos I should say... My source tree has a lot of tabs open and each project is run by someone with their own ideologies on how stuff should be done and laid out and what not. Basically jumping between these projects leaves you mildly capable on all of them but not amazing at any of individual one them--
--I digress.
There's a bug I've been trying to fix.
--Stupid simple bug, literally just a casting issue or something but there's so much data in this one object that it's taking a few solid minutes of concentration to figure out which variable is busting it all up. It shouldn't take long to fix...
But it has. It has taken 4 days.
FOUR. DAYS.
...To fix what is basically a null reference exception.
Every time I sit down to work on this bug real quick I get pulled away to do a wireframe or change a flow chart or diagram or colour or print styling.
Every. God. Damn. Time.
4 days. Soon to be 5.
My commits are real low at this point guys.
Please boss man, just let me code...4 -
*based on a true story*
Co-worker: Let's release it
Me: Wait, I want to add just a little feature
Co-worker: Is it necessary?
Me: Trust me
*5 minutes later*
Co-worker: So, have you finished implementing your "little feature"?
Me: Yeah, well, it's done. Maybe.
Co-worker: What the hell have you done?
Me: MAYBE I've added 647 lines of codes to the file to implement my little feature, MAYBE it doesn't works and MAYBE the entire project is compromised
Co-worker: ah3 -
Manager: Could you create the UI for the new feature? The client wants to test it. We need it in 3 days.
*1 week later*
Client: IT DOESNT WORK
Me: This is just a visual demo... but everything will work when we realse the feature.
Client: okay but can I see what it will do?
Of course you can! Just wait until we relase it!
*2 weeks later*
Manager: What are you doing?
Me: Working on the UI for the new feature.
Manager: Wait, hadn't you already done it for the demo?
Me: That UI didn't really work. It was basically a bunch of HTML, without reactivity or abstraction or any functionality.
Manager: Okay, how much where you able to re-use?
Me: almost nothing.
Manager: So... you wasted those 3 days?
Oh so I'm the one who wasted 3 days.
Me: Kinda, yeah
Manager: Why couldn't you have done this when I asked you to do the UI?
You can't expect good quality code in 3 days. Pls stop wasting it on demos.3 -
Talked with my boss about documentation for projects in markdown instead of (shiver) MS Word. My boss laughed after I explained what mark down was and said that she did not want a world where we had to edit text files all day.
Wait? What do you think programming is?!?
Also Word is basically a text file with tons of proprietary bloated junk on top. Any “feature” it has is not needed.15 -
I stopped caring about managers loving endless meetings and priority shifts.
They pay me to attend to meetings.
I'll give them what they want.
But if they ask me if the feature is done, I make them attend a meeting for that.3 -
I got my first programming job half a year ago, the lead developer there is really fucked up... he is old fashioned and stubborn as hell. He developed a platform that is a mess, his comment: “it works”... but now I have to fix it... I argued with my boss and convinced him to put more time in making it more scalable and feature proof. But the lead developer back then... he didn’t agree it seems like he want to do everything as quickly as possible... now half a year later he stopped working for us and I’m the lead developer now.
And I’m discovering more and more bad decisions... HOWWWW
WHAT DID THIS GUY DO???
At one time I was arguing with him and he backfired a comment: “I’m doing it like this for 10 years”... so I guess that’s the problem... he didn’t put effort in keeping up with the latest developments...
There is literally no structure in his work, every file is different... HOW DO I FIX THIS IN A NICE WAY??? I’m thinking to just start over again...11 -
So my department is "integrating CI/CD"
Right now, there's a very anti-automation culture in the deployment process, and out of our many applications, almost none have automated testing. And my groups is the only one that uses feature branching - one of the few groups that uses branching at all beyond "master, dev"
So yeah... You could see how this is already ENTIRELY fucked from the very beginning.
First thing they want to do is add better support for a process... Which goes directly against CI/CD.
The process is that to deploy to production (even after it is manually approved by manager), someone in another department needs to press a button to manually deploy. This, as far as I can tell, is for business rule reasons rather than technical ones.
They want us to improve that (the system will stay exactly the same with some streamlined options for said button pressers)
I'm absolutely astounded at the way our management wants to do something but goes in exactly the opposite direction. It's like the found an article of what CI/CD was and then took notes on exactly what not to do.25 -
I suspect this may happen to alot of people:
Me: Is this the right way to implement the feature?
Lecturer: yes that looks good
Me: *happy*
*Results come out*
Lecturer: *deducts marks for no reason*
Me: You said this is the right way of doing this...
Lecturer: I didn't quite see what you're trying to do
Me: it's fully commented.................
Lecturer: *confused as fuck* i will remark and get back to you
Me: *thinking* fucking retard playing with my grades like it's a joke.2 -
Me doing front-end work and get a stupid feature request from a customer...."I'll have to talk to our back-end developer and DBA to see if those changes are possible".
Guess what...Im the back-end developer and DBA and the answer is "hell no".2 -
If you're using snapchat you might want to go on it immediately and change your privacy settings.
New update came out, they added a map with everybody's locations down to a couple of meters in accuracy... And the feature is on by default for EVERYONE to see, not just your friends.
What the actual fuck were they thinking?? Just think of all the ways this can go wrong.9 -
SM = Scrum Master
SM: "Card #130, you added a comment saying you aren't going to do update the report?"
Me:"Yea, I explained why in the comment"
SM: "Product owner wants it."
Me: "Product owner isn't the manager using it. I talked with Steve, he said the data is accurate and they have to go to the database anyway to verify the error. That report has no way of knowing the message logged could be a false positive."
SM: "That's not our job to decide. If the Product Owner wants the feature, we add the feature."
Me: "It is absolutely is our job. Steve is the user of the report. I could really care less what the product owner said. The only reason he created the card was because Steve told him a specific error logged could be a false positive, and only happens, maybe, once a month. I'm not wasting my time, Steve's time, or this project's time on wild goose chases."
SM: "I'll schedule a meeting this afternoon to discuss the issue with the product owner. Don't worry, if you can't figure out how to filter out the false positives, I'll assign the ticket to me."
fracking fracking kiss ass. I swear, if he goes behind my back again ....I... deep breath....ahhh...OK..Thanks devrant. Work place incident diverted.6 -
Boss: "i need you to build a feature so that customers can do bla bla bla and it has to be done by friday.
Dev: "Ok i can do it fast if you sure this is what you want, and requirements wont change in the future. Have you considered bla bla"
Boss: "Yes do it"
Dev: *writes, tests and deploys code*
A few weeks later:
Boss: "we need to add bla bla to the feature you built since some requirements has changed."10 -
One of my project managers wanted a feature where the user can save over files without having to delete all information of the previous file and that they could go through previous versions. So I told him, "Okay, what you want is a versioning system." Then he proceeded to say no and describe the exact same thing as a versioning system. I wanted to yell at him that that's exactly what he wanted but kept my mouth shut because there is no point in continuing the conversation.2
-
Here I am trying to get some tickets for a theater, and I noticed an interesting thing. It seems that the website holds no session persistence. In other words it doesn't check to see if the user has stopped trying to order tickets, instead it holds the seats for about 30 minutes. This is kind of stupid because when you back out, your treated as a completely new session, you have no way of trying to get back the seats you had chosen.
Sooo, what does this mean? It means that I can start selecting a bunch of seats and continue selecting a bunch of seats. There appears to be no server-side checks to prevent someone from just booking the entire theater.
Soooooo, what does this mean? I could potentially spam the entire country's theaters (any that use this website as a booking system) and make it impossible for people to book seats through this website.
What do you guys think? Is this a bug or feature?6 -
Tldr; my "this is not bug, its a feature" moment actually turned my bug into a feature.
Today we were presenting a project which has imposible deadline. I am developing this small project alone (which is probably good). I implemented core features first but I know project still have bugs and a lot of tech debts. Another friend started to presenting our demo and a wild bug appeared as expected. He was adding rows to a table. To add a new you gotta open new modal by clicking + button and fill the form. One of the fields had a bug. When you add row by clicking Ok button, the value of the field stayed there after you open modal again. So its basically a state problem in React. I forgot to clear previous state of modal. When they see that and my friend said "oh we got a bug there". Then I enabled my mic and said "thats not a bug, thats a feature. I didn't want to enter that field again and again when I adding multiple rows and made it persistent." and you know what? They liked the idea! They requested to add that bug to two more fields. I was just joking and my "this is not bug, its a feature" moment actually turned my bug into a feature. Instead of fixing it, I'm creating more of this bug. LOL!5 -
I worked on a feature that included setting a cookie to expire in an hour.
QA: The cookie’s time should be set to my local time.
Me: What the—are you kidding me?!The cookie’s exp time is in UTC. Whether you’re in NY or Singapore, that cookie will expire an hour from when it’s issued. Now stop flagging non issues and beta accept my ticket.
This is the weirdest s*** QA has pulled.8 -
I'm cry-laughing.
Management wanted us to deliver a completely new feature before the holidays (see my previous rant) and they were acting really sad when we told them it is impossible. It turns out they really want it to be done, and instead of realising it is not going to happen, they are coming up with brilliant new ideas on what we should do and how should we do it on a daily basis. It was just just a little nuisance until today, listening to them and reading their mails for half an hour a day is not a big deal.
So guess what? They changed the whole fucking specification today. I can't even...6 -
What??
What the hell Yahoo?
Yahoo considering Ads a key feature for the peroformance of the mail box !
And who the hell is still using Yahoo anyway !
(Sent by friend)11 -
What a lazy fuck.
This so called full-stack developer doesn't know how to use mysql from command line. The only way he can do anything in the database is using phpMyAdmin or MySQL gui.
What? How do you even call yourself a developer when you don't know how to use basic command line tools?
The fucker wants me to find out why a particular feature is not working?
Why the fuck are you being paid for? You stupid idiot.
"Can you please grep ... in the server?"
What? Why would I do that for you? How about you ssh the server yourself?
What a waste of time.5 -
I'm currently developing an integration to an API and I found out a bug.
So I asked the contact person for the API if this feature was intentional. I did this on their forum for the API and I sent it as a private message to him.
I got a response telling me that they dont have the "sufficient details" to answer my question and that they would investigate the feature "comprehensivley".
5 minutes later I see a post on the forum in the developer section from the contact dude and it was my fucking question.
So now he's asking the users of the API if his and his companys own bug is intentional.
What the actual fuck?!
Is this how you investigate things "comprehensivley"? -
That log4j RCE is some fucking nasty business!!! Its exploits have already been observed multiple times in our company scope.
Time for some unplanned Saturday evening hot-patches :/
P.S. Why the fuck leave such a feature enabled as default??? I mean really, whose brilliant idea was "let's leave the message parser enabled as well as the LDAP query hooks... BY FUCKING DEFAULT!!!"
I mean really, is anyone using that? ANYONE?
And then they laugh at me when I say "stay away from frameworks", "use as little libraries as possible", "avoid foreign code in your codebase",...
you know what.... JOKE'S ON YOU!10 -
~2 years ago:
Me: Managed to figure out how to port that library. Just need designs and then we can build feature X. I've tested it in ugly developer-y screens. It works fully
Boss: Thats awesome, saw the video, looks great. This is a really important feature, thanks for looking into this
~1.5 years ago:
Me: Ok i've started working on the designs, just FYI we don't have designs for feature X
Boss: Ok, must have slipped, noted
~1 year ago:
Me: I've seen more posts about users wanting apps with features X in it. Still don't have designs, we working on that?
Boss: I'll check with design
~3 Months ago:
Boss: Ok were going to have to get serious about pulling features out and reducing MVP so we can get this out there. I think feature A, D, Y and X have to be dropped for v1. Theres too much left to do on them
Me: sure
~1 week ago:
Boss: We need to start getting ready for xxxxx. Can you do me a favour and start writing up some developer docs etc, kind of like this one we did for this other project
This morning opening my emails from last night:
Boss: I've reviewed the doc, looks good, only minor things need tweaking. Let me ask you something though, you said feature X was pulled out and its "pending design work". Its not only pending design work is it? Is it that far along?
==========
What I actually replied:
Yes ... i've sent you videos of it functional in the past, and discussed this ... more than once. Just design ... and some testing of the new designs obviously
==========
What that meant:
Yes. May god have mercy on your soul if you reply anything even remotely close to "oh I had no idea, lets revisit adding this to v1". I will not be held accountable for my actions1 -
So a few months ago, I had this massive feature to add to one of the projects I look after. That’s usually not a problem, turning a sprint into a month+ but what ever, this feature was going to save hours of data entry and is extremely needed!!!
Come to present day, this feature hasn’t been used once, and probably won’t be for another 6 months. I just love deploying “needed” things that don’t get used. -
Don't you just hate when your boss goes like:
"Why isn't this feature working?"
SHIT FUCK, IF I KNEW THE REASON, MAYBE I WOULD HAVE FIXED THAT SHIT, INNIT?
WHAT KIND OF FUCKING QUESTION IS THAT?
"Well you should have tested better"
IT TOOK A MONTH FOR 1 USER TO SEE THAT BUG, WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? YOU EXPECT ME TO SEE THAT BUG IN THE FEW HOURS OF TESTING I CAN ACTUALLY DO FOR THIS PROJECT?
"There also are other 15 project to get done"
FUCK THIS SHIT -
Me: Ah, just have to finish this one small feature today and this whole massive update is done. Everyone will be off my back, things will calm down. Gonna be great.
Life: hey man, you know what I was thinking? It’s been a really long time since you had one of those vomiting bugs ... you know the gut wrenching, massive headache, can’t do anything but stare at the walls kind of flu’s?
Me: ...... eh I’m ok thanks.
Life: oh buddy you don’t understand ...... RUN!!!2 -
You know what really grinds my gears? When new employees start shouting out suggestions of what feature we should do.. and how stupid this/that thing now.. or how slow that page is.. or how there's a bug somewhere.
WHAT WOULD'VE WE DONE WITHOUT YOUR OPINION?! thank you so much!!!
+10 points if their job has nothing to do with product or development
SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP
please!!!15 -
"Impossible deadline experience?"
When product owners promise delivery dates.
One day, I came back from a two weeks holiday, relaxed. I noticed a teammate missing. "Yes, he took the week off". Sure, why not.
We were working under a bastardized enterprisey version of Scrum (didn't we all at some point?). So we didn't just have a product owner, we had three and an additional "Head of PO". Because enterprises can't live without hierarchies or something. Barely an hour after I came into office, she entered the room and came straight to me. "Your coworker was almost done implementing feature X. You need to finish it immediately. No worries, though, coworker said the rest is a piece of cake".
It wasn't. There was *a lot* left to do, the JIRA task wasn't entirely clear, and the existing code for the feature was so-so (obviously WIP code). I estimated two weeks for the implementation, plus some time to clarify the requirements. When telling "Head of PO" she lost her shit. Screaming things like "this feature is due the end of this week" and "I signed this with my blood!". Well, I didn't, and I made it clear that I hadn't been consulted on this, thus I would not accept any blame in case we missed the deadline.
So I gave my best that week, getting pestered by "Head of PO" all the time. "Is it done yet?", "why does it take so long?" and "your coworker would've been done by now!". Yeah fuck you, too. Not only was I not relaxed any more, I was even more stressed than before my holiday! Thanks, you stupid bitch.
Well, her arbitrary deadline came and the feature wasn't ready. And what happened was... exactly nothing. The following week my coworker returned, who gave me an apologetic smile. "I told her the feature was nowhere finished. And even me, being familiar with the task, couldn't make it in time". We finished the feature together that week, and that was the end of it. So... "Head of PO" either didn't listen or lied to me. She then stressed me to the max right from the day I came back from my holiday. And in the end it didn't even matter.
Again, thanks you stupid bitch, for creating a toxic work environment. Should you ever read this, I'm happy I quit and I hope you miss every single deadline for the rest of your life. Screw you.8 -
Don't attack flies using tanks.
In 2020, a bug was found in gnome-terminal where selecting many megabytes of text inside the terminal would cause the terminal emulator to crash.
As a remedy, the brain of gnome-terminal developer Christian Persch spawned a "brilliant idea": Limiting the "Select all" feature to selecting only the portion of text that is visible on screen.
In other words, Persch made the "Select all" option useless. After pressing "Select all", it appeared as if everything was selected, but once you scrolled up, nothing beyond what was visible was selected.
By solving a minor problem that rarely ever occurs, Christian Persch created a major problem that often occurs.
Source for screenshot: https://gitlab.gnome.org/GNOME/...11 -
Background:
New guy on our team, deadline coming up. I bring him into a meeting room, explain what the project is about, quick run down of the code. Then spent a while explaining what we have to do next, gave him a piece to do, took a piece to do myself.
The fuck up:
A few days / week pass by and I ask to check on his progress. Fucktard decided an hour after the meeting that it would be easier for him to use a different database than what the project was using and decided he wanted to work on some other feature instead.
My stuff was dependent on his stuff, so not only did he not do his work but stopped me from delivering mine.
Let’s just say there was a few stern words in a meeting room shortly after that.1 -
Game dev has never been more amazing. I am playing with different ideas for terrain. I want to modify terrain and build structures as part of game play. I thought about using a structure of my own to represent buildings and other structures. I got to thinking that maybe what I really want is voxels. So I decided to play with the Godot voxel plugin. I am looking at the "examples". Then I see this:
https://github.com/Zylann/...
"This is a 3D space game demo, with procedurally-generated planets." Wait what? I run the demo and I can fly to different planets and deform the terrain on each planet. This is a demo? Isn't this a main feature of NMS as a demo? Shocked but really excited. I can't wait to play with this.
Here is a screenshot from the demo:9 -
*At the daily status meeting*
Manager: I don’t have anything to table or anything I want to ask about. I honestly don’t know what the point of this meeting even is.
*Throughout every other living breathing moment of time*
Manager: Hey, I had an idea
Manager: Hey, I wanted to get your thoughts on something
Manager: Hey, what do you think about…
Manager: Hey, what are you currently working on?
Manager: Do you think you could just *sneak* in this new feature request and have it to me by EOD?
Manager: Hey, I just sent you an email
The email: Hey I think I found a bug, it’s with image alignment in Microsoft Word and it’s pretty breaking to my productivity report. Do you think you could take a look right now? Thoughts?5 -
The internet is expensive as hell compared with salaries, we can't access to services like amazon, google cloud, gitlab, private github, Android, and a lot more because of USA sanctions (we have to do some magic and sorcery to use them), and in the other hand our government applys restrictive laws (we call it the double embargo) like that one who says that you can't host services for the country with international providers, and the only national hosting provider has a terrible, feature-less and super expensive service. But hey, we like a lot what we do!!
- Cuba11 -
Holy fuck is learning new frameworks frustrating.
I'm trying to setup a simple fucking flutter app and all their tutorials are basic shit with no auth/complex routing.
Any feature of flutter that's not in a tutorial has absolute shit documentation with 0 examples on how to use it.
Material app has like 20 properties and if you click on something like on generate there is shit for knowing what the fuck it's expecting.
Stackoverflow has a ton a code but that's just it, code. I have absolutely no idea how they generate the code they have from the documentation on the site. They must have been following flutter from the start.
Ahhhhh! 😠13 -
in your opinion, what is the most important feature of a programming language? For me it’s getting paid for using it.13
-
Yay, I have to rewrite + design a 15-20 year old website 🎉
Originally written in, God knows what version of php, HTML and JS by a Java dev, and patched every other year when something broke or a new feature was needed, every time by someone new...
Some years ago the system was moved from a Windows host to Ubuntu and that was a nightmare in its own, because of all the hard-coded paths...
Welp, at least some fucker found another fucker who is willing to create a new design for the site, so that's off my plate...5 -
Today teaching the product managers what the channel in "selected for development" in Jira means.
Guess what? IT MEANS THE FEATURE IS READY TO BE DEVELOPED ON, NOT SOME HALF-BAKED CROCK POT IDEA WITH A TWO-SENTENCE DESCRIPTION DESCRIBING ABSOLUTELY FUCK ALL!!!1 -
My patience limits are huge but our product manager seems that likes to stretch them.
You piece of fuckin shit. You ask for feature A and we agree on the way we will do it. Good. Half way you want to change it's behavior.
Fine, i accept that. Let's move on.
I'm close to finish it and you come and say let's add more on that feature and make it more complicated. I can't say anything, just fine and let me work on it.
Then you and the senior dev that "helps" us don't come to 2 meetings and just communicate via emails.
And then, then you fuckin scums tell me that is unacceptable that i haven't finished it and it doesn't work?
I used my uni time and missed lessons to work on your shitty feature and that you just yell at me?
What about comming to the fuckin meetings so we can discuss what problems occured and how i can overcome them, you sucker?
Just because our boss complained to you that the product is late because of you, that doesn't give you the right to yell at me, you piece of shit.
And the next time you tell me that you pulled the repository and it doesn't work while it does on everyone else i will come and shove your laptop up to your ass.1 -
I’m so fucking sick and tired of !devs telling me how simple a feature should be to implement.
Like motherfucker the most complicated thing you’ve ever done with a computer is attempt (and fail) at working with tables in Microsoft Word and you’re trying to tell me how long a new feature/K8s architecture/noSQL aggregation should take to implement?
A monitor cable wiggling loose paralyses you for hours but I’m supposed to bow down to your understanding of what is causing a bug?6 -
Why THE FUCK is screen mirroring without being in the same wifi network a thing?
Why THE FUCK have all these smart tvs turned this on by default?
Why THE FUCK does the list of found devices SORT itself RANDOMLY if another device is found.
I probably mirrored my phone screen to a random tv in the neighbourhood because as soon as my finger was about to touch the name of my tv, a random tv swooshed into it's place.
WHAT THE FUCK THERE IS NO FUCKING NEED FOR THIS FEATURE IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY ACCESS POINT AROUND, THERE WILL BE ONE IN 99% OF ALL POSSIBLE USE CASES.
I mean if I got it right, i can share porn with my neighbors now, or at least annoy them?8 -
Today is a stark reminder of why i want to leave here. First we couldn't do anything because production was down which blocks dev login. Then support tells me I need to work harder because my bug count keeps going up. But what is in my bugs? Feature requests, global changes, and work that isn't mine. Gee thanks :( Why does support get to comment on my performance anyway by something as dumb as a bug count? Grrr.5
-
Me: Im testing a new feature that is not on production yet for 30m and can not make it work. (I asked the developer for any idea why is not working)
Dev: i just tested, works fine.
Me: i just tested again with no luck. I’m i missing anything?
Dev: (Developer comes to my desk). Lets see what you doing wrong here. (After 5seconds). You're not on UAT. You have been redirected to the production and you've been testing there all this time.
Me: 😩 -
WTF Windows.
I was assigned as TA to a highschool CS class, and was doing a live demonstration to ~20 students on how to install the Python environment and set up venv (on Windows, since that is what the majority of students use).
After installing Python, I tried to demonstrate invoking the Python environment by typing "python" in the command prompt. However, that opened up Microsoft Store instead.
Being extremely confused, I had to talk nonsense for 2 minutes while frantically look up what happened on another screen.
In the end, it seems like Microsoft recently introduced this "feature" that automatically associates the opening of a program to whatever it feels like.
-.-9 -
This isn't a rant. This is a brag on my team.
I asked the team what exactly a feature did. They read me the test code.
I may get a little weepy. So proud. -
A lesson I learned. Clients can't separate design from functionality. They will piss and main about a feature not working right when what they really mean is the aesthetic is not to their liking.
-
Created 'GET STARTED' section in our application in English. It will guide new user to Highlight some App features.
End User started Posting screenshot of it in our feedbacks service : What this is?
Implemented 'GET STARTED' in local languages.
End user started posting screenshot of Language Drop Down, what this is?
Implemented 'GET STARTED' on Location based Language.
End User : I am here in Banglore seeing it in Different Language, my other Partners in Hyderabad are seeing it in different language. What this is?
Removed 'GET STARTED'.
End User : It was a nice feature. Why you removed it? What this is?
May be i over reacted but i am not bringing it back.8 -
My new co-worker is extremely stressing. I have to give small tasks so he won't forget to do anything. I also have to explain what he has to do in detail, give him the full solution, and show him exactly how he has to do it.
And he has no idea how to use git. He makes a feature branch and pushes all his various, half-finished features into it and makes a pull request.
And then I still have to refactor his crappy code everytime cause he uses variables like $data, $accA, $accB, $accZ and forgets to use the definied color variables in sass.
I literally have to do my work and his as well -_-6 -
I'm working on this project; it's for a large organization that desires to use blockchain simply "because it the feature" and not for any actual use-case; anyway, after a week or so we had a team meeting and my supervisor asks what have we accomplished so far, I was dumb enough to state that it went fabulous but I can't see how the use of blockchain is beneficial to the project, his response was "OK, I'll let you know what more features to implement to make sure you use blockchain well". And I'm just looking at my co-workers like "plz don't hate me".6
-
In only I were 1.15 times faster or had better planning (why didn’t I use the Saturday Sunday at the end of the first week 🤦🏼♂️), things would’ve happened differently. I think I’m becoming stupid and my tolerance levels are going down too.
So this happened a while back ..
I was given a code base which didn’t have any changes in the last two years and I was asked to add a feature to this. This was my first task in this new group I was part of. I had two weeks to do this starting on a Monday.
Partway through implementation I realised that the code base is a pile of shit and I wasn’t doing myself or anyone else any favours by shitting on it.
It’s Wednesday. I’ve dealt with many other codebases before but the urge to rewrite this particular one was just unlike anything else. And so I started changing code and before I realised, I modified almost all the important files.
I got sick of this mixed up code and started a rewrite from scratch. It was Friday and I finally had just the basic mechanics of the whole thing working. Now I needed to add all the functionalities and also my new feature.
It should be noted that at no point did I tell any of the superiors I was doing this fearing what they might say and also fearing going back to adding shit to shit.
By the end of the second week, the rewrite was complete and I only had the new feature to add. The rewrite was significantly smaller, compartmentalised and well commented because I did the bloody commenting (where it was not obvious from the code). So on Friday, I was asked about the progress and I told them that it needed some more work and that I need a couple more days. And I got shit for it. I was told it was a mistake giving this task to me and that I am not competent enough. One of the superiors told the other superior about perhaps giving me something more suited to my level. To be fair to them, they were expecting the work in the two weeks to be for the new feature.
And in two days’ time, on Monday (I worked on Saturday and half of Sunday), I finished the whole thing and gave it to them. New feature was working. And I still did not tell them what I did. The tool worked fine so they had no idea what happened because this project had no version control and I pointed them to a new directory with the new code with a first commit.3 -
Me: Im testing a new feature that is not on production yet for 30m and can not make it work. (I asked the developer for any idea why is not working)
Dev: i just tested, works fine.
Me: i just tested again with no luck. I’m i missing anything?
Dev: (Developer comes to my desk). Lets see what you doing wrong here. (After 5seconds). You have been redirected to the production site and you've been testing there all this time.
Me: 😩1 -
My new favourite commit message:
"All changes as of 18th Sept"
How tremendously useful? There I was looking to know what changes were made to enable a feature / service, thought I could look for that in the commit message, but no you've given me a much more efficient way of finding out.
I simply need to download the contents of your memory, find out what date you made a change, and then dig through the massive commit to find the piece of info I need.
Forget experience using Git features, managing merges, following Git flow, or even any other SCM ... how can people be so tick when it comes to recording what they've done.
Heres a little cheat sheet for those struggling:
- Commit message
Describe what you actually ****ing did. Don't tell me the date or the time, thankfully Git records those. Don't tell me the day of the week, if I need to know I can figure that out, just tell me what ... you ... did.
- Feature branch names
Now this is a tricky one. You might be surprised to know that this isn't in fact suppose to be whatever random adjective or noun popped into your head ... I know, I too was shocked. The purpose of this is to let other people know what new feature is being worked on in this branch.
- Reusing feature branches
Now I know you started it to add some unit tests, and naming it "testing" is sort of ok. But its actually not ok to name it testing when you add 3 unit tests ... then rip out and replace 60% of the business logic. Perhaps it would have been wiser to create a new feature branch, given you are now working on a new feature.2 -
Writing an efficient, modern renderer is truly an exercise of patience. You have a good idea? Hah, fuck you, GPUs don't support that. Okay but what if I try to use this advanced feature? Eh, probably not going to support exactly what you would like to do. Okay fuck it I'm gonna use the most obscure features possible. Congratulations, it doesn't work even on the niche hardware that supports that extension
If I sound jaded, ya better believe I f*cking am! I cannot wait for more graphics cards to support features like mesh shaders so we can finally compute shader all the things and do things the way we want to god dammit -
In game development feature creep tends to kill games because it's just as much about what's NOT there as what IS there.
Take The Last of Us for example. Would a strategic tower defense segment make sense? No? And if it was a *hugely* popular mechanic at the time of development is there a real chance they would have included such a segment in TLOU? Yes.
Don't just believe me. Go take a look at what happened to the original Fortnite versus the hills-have-eyes inbred offspring that it became all because PUBG and its format were cancerously mega popular at the time.
That's why while developing my game Atom Ranger (now with 100% less multiplayer!), a mix between metro and don't starve, I spent six years *pruning* features. You can click my referral link and get 50% off the opportunity to become an unpaid tester of the pre-prealpha right now, "for hardcore players only!" (Tm)
My game:5 -
So last week I really fucked up
I had this new implementation that was supposedly to be integrating smoothly into the rest of the service. It depended on a serialized model made by a data scientist. I test it in local, in QA environment: no problem.
So, Friday, 4pm, I decide to deploy to production. I check once from the app: the service throw an error. Panic attack, my chief is at my desk, we triy to understand what went wrong. I make calls with cUrls: no problem. Everything seems fine. I recheck from the app again: no problem.
We dedice to let it in prod, as the feature work. I go get some beers with the guys, to celebrate the deploy.
Fast-forward the next morning, 11am, my phone ring: it's a colleague of my chief. "Please check Slack, a client is trying to use the feature, it's broken"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!
Panic attack again. I go to the computer, check the errors: two types of errors. One I can fix, the other from a missing package on the machine that the data guy used.
Needless to say, I had a fairly good weekend.
Lessons learned:
- make sure Dev, QA and Prod are exactly the same (use Ansible or Container)
- never deploy on a Friday afternoon if you don't have a quick way to revert1 -
Workload rant.
Our new line manager is overly expecting from all of us (product/design/tech) and is micro managing on ground level without having any real sense of reality. He just wants everything to be built overnight.
He is smart, no doubt about that. But guess, I learnt from him what I had to. Not to stereotype but he is a typical Indian manager who keeps pushing boundaries.
He just added 80 features for Q1 roadmap with on 3 PMs, 1 Designer, 1TPM, and bunch of techies .
What the actual fuck! 😂😂😂 And he wanted to add more, thankfully we ran out of time in the meeting.
And my super talent and genius blabbering co-woker who works mechanically just fucked herself real bad. Lol
I kept telling her not to add Feature XYZ to the roadmap because:
1. There'll be spill over from Q4
2. She is already overloaded with 1 task and keeps crying all day about being unable to handle it
3. She is setting wrong expectations with management for herself and rest of the team
4. Boss will add more work and she'll be fucked
She was adamant and did not listen.
Now this is what happened:
1. ALL her Q4 items got pushed to Q1. LMFAO
2. She was literally crying since morning on calls for being overloaded and we are yet to start Q1 assignments
3. Additional tasks along side feature XYZ were added on her plate
I tried to push back the manager and that's when he said okay, let's keep some items for Q2.
But holy shit. 80 features between such a small team and wanted to done in few weeks.
I need to pump more steam in my job hunt activity. This place is ridiculously toxic.33 -
Neat: MongoDB. Fairly easy to use, intuitive-ish JSON API. Thinking about using it on a project. Excitement.
Neater: Data validation. You can have it drop writes that don't match a schema. Excitement intensifies.
Braindead: It absolutely will not tell you exactly *why* the write doesn't meet the schema, leaving you to figure that out on your own, smart guy. Mongo smugly crosses its arms and tells you to go back and do it right without actually telling you what the problem is.
Fucking braindead: This has been an open feature request since year of our lord two-thousand-and-fucking-fifteen. https://jira.mongodb.org/browse/...7 -
I don't mind Apple marketing themselves as these revolutionary thinkers and innovators, because I figured most people see behind the marketing but appreciate Apple for what it is. It's a big company that makes well built products, that are efficient and give good support to those products.
But I'm sick to death of tech journalists talking about how every new feature is the death of Android. They have to be kidding themselves if they think what Apple's doing is innovating. Samsung's been designing screens for the bezelless market for a LONG time, and their technology in that is incredibly advanced (it's why if you use their iPhone x you'll be looking at a screen from Samsung!)
They finally adopted wireless charging and pretended it was brand new, but I remember when they came out with the Apple watch, marketing it like they'd broken ground when Android Wear watches had been out for a year!
I don't want people to think I hate Apple, I own a few of their products. I think they're remarkably invested in user privacy; homekit imo is one of the most forward thinking implementations of smart home technology that I've seen, and the new processor in the iPhone x is a Mammoth powerhouse. So, I'm not necessarily saying anything about that, but what I am saying is that they're iñcredible at marketing, but fanboys but are not self-aware can enough to recognize when the Designed-by-Apple hype over shadows the actual objectivity or the situation. There are articles already talking about Apple's wireless charging.
TL;DR I swear to god if an apple fanboy comes at me saying the bezelless design was Apple's innovation, I'm going to snap. I appreciate what Apple does well, but unfortunately people can't appreciate a product without needing to identify with it.6 -
Todays story: conversation between me and my brain about a app that i have planned for a long while.
The application is just a huge, specyfic json editor/manager for a game that i like. The game uses json files to determine unit charactetistics. So in order to make modding easier i want to make a tool for that that is fancier and easier to use than a notepad.
Brain> Lets make a app that allows you to mod the game easier!
Me> Good idea. How would you want to make it?
Brain> Lets use C# cause you main that lang currently and you have experience with json parser lib.
Me> That is true. So what do you wanna implement first?
Brain> Oh. I have thought about it before! I want to implement: (10 000 features) and maybe few more later!
Me> It sounds like a infinity project, shouldnt you implement like 1 or 2 features at first and then jump to other ones?
Brain> Yes... but i dont wanna refactor those features latter so let just implement them all at once!
Me> Dammit brain! Let just implement just one feature now! Like a simple json editor. You can use inhieritance to reuse the code later.
Brain> Ok...
* Starts with that one feature but one day later starts coding 6 more *
* Cant publish the app yet, the code looks like shit, gui is unfinished because brain wanted only to test those 6 unfinished features without propely implementing them *
Me> Brain WTF! You said that you are going to focus on one feature at the time!
Brain> I got carried a bit...
Me> ...
Me> Ok. I understand. Let just refactor the code and clean the project out of those unfinished features.
Brain> No. I have a depression now...
Me> FUCK.
* 2 month passes by without any progress on ANY of my projects*
current day
Brain> I still have depression...
Me> Ok i dont care about that anymore! Tell me something that i dont know!
Brain> Oh I have good news as well!
Me> ???
Brain> What about the home server that is going to store all mods made by the users so they can share it? It would be a good practice with networking!
Me> * Gives up *1 -
Reading another rant about scrolling and decimal values I felt an urge to write about a bad practice I often see.
Load on demand when scrolling has been popular for quite some years but when implementing it, take some time to consider the pages overall layout.
I have several times encountered sites with this “helpful” feature that at the same time follows another staple feature of pages, especially news sites, of putting contact and address information in the footer ...
Genius right :)
I scroll down to find contact info and just as it comes in view new content gets loaded and pushes it out of view.
If you plan to use load on demand, make sure there is nothing below anyone will try to reach, no text or links or even pictures, you will frustrate the visitor ;)
The rant I was inspired by probably did not do this but its what got me thinking.
https://devrant.com/rants/1356907/...1 -
So when code is badly written, more corner cases are unnecessarily introduced. And it’s sometimes tricky to find the corner cases and probably messy to fix the corner cases.
And so the code grows in size as a result. And when these fixes to the corner cases are not well done, they introduce more corner cases.
So what results is a large collection of corner cases. Only corner cases remain when this goes on for a while.
Because of this, every new feature can be effectively translated to a collection of corner cases to be implemented.
As corners grow, triangles become circles and tetrahedrons become spheres.
I live in such a sphere.8 -
You know what a payment feature that is “so secure even the correct user can’t use it” is called?
FUCKING BROKEN. Jesus Christ I hate it when “customer service” people are trying to sound smart.1 -
When a manager asks if you can implement a feature (their are legitimately not sure if it is even possible) and you say yes and they say, "Good, 'cause I already assured the client that we would provide it on the next release"
Like, what the actual fuck...1 -
What a 'nice' feeling.. 15 mins before the conf call with a client, a coworker comes to me to ask how some feature is working. OK, wouldn't be a problem if it wasn't him developing it.. O.o I just know he was working on this, no details, no nothing.. Don't even know where in GUI to find the dialog in question.. So I asked him if he tested it and if it is working like he descirebed to the customer.. Guess what?! He didn't know the answer to either question.. nice... O.o
-
An old client came back to me stating that I didn't fix the last change he requested a month ago. I went in old emails, found out what he needed, tried the website, it was doing exactly what he wanted.
I wrote to him with confusion asking what was he wanted me to fix.
"It's not working"
"It is"
"No, it's not. Can't you see?"
I attached old email conversations and sent him to see for himself.
"I am not talking about that." I want it to work like this, like that, blah blah blah.
-------------
Fucking asshole. Tell me you wanted new feature in the website. -
We are 2 people working as remote android devs for this startup in another country. 6 weeks ago a new person joined onsite to work directly in startup HQ. I'l refer to him as an newguy.
Last week we started new sprint (of 2 weeks) to work on a new feature.
Newguy was responsible for gathering all the specs and planning, so this is how our sprint is going so far:
Day 1:
We have 10+ tickets in jira (tickets have only titles) no one knows what to do and we don't even have specification. I started pushing everybody onsite to get their shit together. We NEED UX/UI specs, we NEED backend to be ready, or at least start working paralelly so that once wer'e done with frontend backend would be ready. I mean cmon guys this feature is already 70% done on iOS, why cant you send us the specification?
Day 2:
We had a meeting on Zoom and talked about missing specification and project manager promised to send us the specs. Meanwhile the idea of feature became clearer so I agreed with the newguy to start researching about best way to implement our solution.
Day 3:
We received the specifications. I provided my research for the feature to the newguy. Turns out the he knew about specification 4-5 days before.
Instead of sharing information with us, he decided to create his own library to do what we want to do and blatantly rejected my research input.
Now he showed his implementaton (which is shit by the way) and presents it as the only way to proceed forward. He offers for us to work paralelly with him on this (basically he wants to write library alone, and we are supposed to somehow implement and test it, but how the fuck we can implement if backend is not ready and library is just a bunch of empty interfaces at this point?)
I talked with one of the teamleads in the startup and told him that this is not the way things were being done here before and new guy is becoming a dictator.
Teamlead talked with new guy and found no issue. Basically newguy defended his sole decision by saying that he did research on his own, there are no libraries that do what we want and he knows better.
Teamlead tells me to STFU because new guy seems competent and he will be leading this feature. Basically from what I gathered teamlead doesn't give a single fuck and wants to delegate all project management to this new guy.
Day 5:
End of the week. New guy claims that his lib is done so we can start implementing properly. I tried implementing his lib but its fucked up and backend is still not ready.
Day 6:
Backend is still not ready, no one is doing anything just waiting for it to be ready.
Day 7 (Today):
Today(Backend is still not ready, no one is doing anything just waiting for it to be ready.
So what can I say? His plan was to probably prove his self worth and try to lead this feature by giving us information at last minute. At the point were we should start implementing instead of researching.
What happened? Motherfucker doesn't know shit about backend, has been notified about backend issues multiple times but his head was so deep up his ass with that new library of his that he delayed the rest of the team.
Result? 7 working days wasted. Out of 3 developers only 1 was actually working (and his fucked up code will have to be rewritten anyways). Only 50% of feature done. Motherfucker tells me that this is how we will work in the future, "paralelly". The fuck is this mate? If you would have worked on this feature alone you would have done it already now, but instead you wait until we remote devs will login and fetch you the test input and talk with backend guys for you? The fuck is wrong with you.
You fucking piece of shit, learn to plan and organize better if you want to lead the team. Now all that you are doing is wasting time, money and getting on everyboys nerves. Im tired of fucking spoon feeding you every day you needy scheming office politics playing piece of shit. Go back to your shithole country and let us work.
When I was responsible for sprint planning I figured out what to do before start of the sprint and remote devs were able to do week's work in 1-2 days and have rest of the week off. This is how it's supposed to be when you work with a remote team. Delegate them separate features, give them proper specs ahead and everyone's happy. Don't start working on frontend if you dont even fucking know when backend will be ready. It's fucking common sense.
Now I need to spoon feed this motherfucker who can't even get information while sitting on his ass onsite in HQ. Fucking hell.8 -
Here's an excerpt from GitHub's mission statement -
"Code is about the people writing it. The tools we create help individuals and companies, public and private, to write better code, faster."
And yet, is there anyone else who goes - "What a load of crap! You came up with Atom and Teletype, but couldn't make your Search feature even a tad less annoying?!"
Only me?
.
.
I'll see myself out. -
Client: This feature is already present in one of my other projects, you just need to copy paste it.
Me: Ohh, I will have a look at it :)
What I felt: Nothing in code works with 'just copy paste!! Bitch.
AND YOU ARE THE 100TH PERSON TELLING ME THAT, SO...... YOU HAVE DIE! -
The only type of client I like being, is a hostile one.
That's why I intend to answer every question of the dev team, with a question.
"So would you like this banner to be blue, or green?"
Does green evoke the same emotions as blue?
"Probably not, but we're asking you so we know how to finish the design..."
Does a design have a will of its own?
"Ok... What do you think about the new e-mail feature?"
Does anyone use e-mail nowadays?
"There are plenty of people who use e-mail professionally."
Are you a professional?
"I don't think this collaboration is going to work out"
Are we done?
(Parody of Ron Swanson) -
sales-managers: How long do you need to implement feature X ?
software-dev: Hmmm, that's nothing we have in our default-packages ... could be nasty, because it won't work without feature Y, which also does not exist in the current version 3 of our system.
I need to investigate this issue.
... 2 days later:
software-dev: This is really a nasty problem - to make X work, we've to reimplement Y for our system version 3, but this won't work with feature Z.
If we do this, it may take several weeks.
sales-manager: we need to go live in 2 months.
software-dev: might work.
------
1 week before go-live:
sales-manager: The customer saw us testing feature X. He does not like it. Could we just do it in ... blabla ... this way?
software-dev: This would work out of the box with feature Z, yes - we've to remove feature Y and X for that. But be warned - this might work next week without testing only.
sales-mamanger: do it now!
day of go live:
The customer tried the new feature X - it won't work.
software-dev: But it's not there, was removed, instead he has to use feature Z.
...
sales-guy comes back: He does not like it.
software-dev: why not? its working!
sales-guy: Yes, but he still wants it to work like feature X as he ordered.
software-dev: according to the specs, its exactly what he ordered. look at that: (showing the general specifications of project, showing feature Z).
...
sales-guy: The customer did not review this new document since last week.... Its still feature X
...
dev: really? why? I sent that version to you the day, he said, he doesn't like feature X, and you said I've to change that just urgently.
sales-guy: Please switch back to the version with X of last week. - could you. please ?
me: This won't work, because the other colleagues already finished their stuff on that currently running system - we'll lose all the optimations we've done to make this and other stuff work.
----- FAIL ------- NEVER DO ANYTHING WITHOUT SIGNATURE OF THE CUSTOMER !!!
One week onsite and rescheduled go-live is just so-what expensive.
Today (some weeks later) ... I saw someone else sitting in sales-guys office.1 -
Big tech hates Apple for introducing Anti-Tracking features into IOS14.5,
https://gizmodo.com/how-to-block-ap...
But...... this isn't what I expected to fall through after that happened.
Google is introducing a similar feature into Android 12 😱
https://gizmodo.com/google-will-let...2 -
When QA keeps on filing bug but you go and check and it's a feature.
No. Seriously IT IS a feature.
Like c'mon! I told you it is a feature. Go and check sys req!
What is wrong with this world? >.<1 -
What's wrong with Mozilla?!
Savvy webdevs use link preloading to break up dependency chains for late discovered resources, and users like the faster loading as result. Firefox 56 started supporting that two and a half years ago. Turned out they had screwed up and it didn't work with non-cacheable resources. So Mozilla "fixed" that by disabling the feature altogether behind some config flag.
And they left it at that - still not supported. They even had patches, but decided not to merge them and instead try something different, some day.
Is Firefox becoming the new IE or what?6 -
How fucking difficult is it to first figure out what the hell you want me to build, before assigning me a project?
But noo...make me implement a feature that will do a completely different thing in two weeks, and a completely different thing a week after that...fuck you Jeff3 -
You know what's a good place for init Files? A standardized place...
A place, where one would expect it...
You know where isn't a good place
/usr/lib/systemd/{user,system}/
You know what is also a fuckin bright idea? Generic names....
Postgresql-10 is a rather anoying service name, if your plattform doesn't feature autocomplete for your plattform. Looking at no one. *Cough* centos *cough*
Well at least manpages for the service would have been nice...2 -
I am so fucking drunk but still I ended up completing a task which is a feature request.... I have no idea how I did it... But it works in staging... That's what I remember.... Will see tomorrow.... I am also the tester in the hierarchy which starts and ends with me... I don't know whether this qualifies as a rant3
-
rant="""
It's too many features for me to keep up with. And the client just bounces between this matrix of all the possible permutations of them, refusing to admit that he is asking for mutually exclusive behavior in more than one place. I have mentioned to him at least 12 times a year that there is too much going on, not organized, we need to simplify, prioritize, or we will have 100 half baked untested features.
Of course it is more or less made it out to be that this is all my fault, or at least it's hard not to feel that way when I say:
It will be a long time before X will be working, we need 25 other things first.;
Next day he asks:
Have you made any progress on X;
I reply: Now we need 24 things to be done at this rate it will be a month.;
He replies:
Ok but I need this yesterday. How about if you add a new feature Y that does everything X does without those 24 things?;
I reply: That will not work at all like X. Y is just X + 1 more feature.
He replies: Ok well I need Y so when you're done with X I need a way to do it like Y also. I just thought it'd be easier.
EASIER TO ADD MORE FUCKING FEATURES YEAH SURE THATS EASY AS FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK FUCK. He's a nice enough guy, pretty smart compared to my first few paying gigs, but wtf really? How do I come out and tell you I need 25 days and you ADD more work? This was one example.
IN TWO days he has added 12 features. And during the week has asked for 29 UI interfaces to be COMPLETELY different. This is becoming COMMONPLACE. Every week there is either a huge change, or a conversation like about that finds its way into the entire business flow inside an dout.
The worst thing is: I TOTALLY understand what he needs. I feel that HE doesn't. This weekend I spent literally HALF of his retainer on getting equipment into my hands to bring it back to find out it DOESNT WORK. Why aisn't HE doing this so I can finish the features from NOVEMBER that HE NEEDS in order to PROCESS SALES.
I've tried and tried but I just can't get through to this client what a tremendous waste of time his \"process\" is, for lack of a better word. Constant changes, contsant additions, lack of clarity, needless repetition and contradictions, constantly adding moonshot ideas to compete with every industry in the region, and not beta testing anything until something goes wrong.
Fuck this guy! His business is failing and I felt responsible for the longest time but it is clear to me that if I wanted to save his business I would have to ignore 95% of his feature requests. I ignore 50% now because of the stress in trying to determine which of the 3 different paradigms he is talking about changing. I will lose this client, and I feel like he will sue me to get all of his money back. He holds me to very little honestly - BUT WEEKLY reminds me that he won't be able to pay me next month if feature XY and Z arent ready!
If a developer is CLEARLY overwhelmed, it makes NO sense at all to continue to PILE ON feature after feature
"""
try:
while true:
rant+=", after feature"
except DevHeadExplodes as inevitable:
raise YourDevsRatesOrLookElsewhere(inevitable)8 -
-See vaguely interesting feature in language (currently C#)
-Look at the docs and psuedocode to get a feel for what the feature is intended for
-Design small project around the feature
-Learn the feature by using it1 -
The state of digital comic book metadata is a mess. There is not really a standard format if the metadata even exists at all. All digital comic books consist of is a zip or rar with ordered images and potentially some type of file to store metadata. The closest thing to a standard is the Comic Rack format of metadata and even that is not very widespread. There exists a project called comictagger(on github) that attempts to assign metadata in Comic Rack format but it is somewhat unpolished yet provides a solid feature set.
I am planning on making a program to organize comics based on metadata attributes and am frustrated with the lack of consistency in this department. This isn't really a problem because of any developers but I would argue more so due to the organization of comic books themselves. For example, the term volume can have a different meaning based on who is asked or what context is used. The redundancy between issues and trade paperbacks can also lead to confusion and logistical problems. I just wish we already had a widespread schema in place for comic books metadata already.9 -
I coded part of feature 2 months ago.
Left it to help frontend guy a bit, deal with fire after release. ( we’re missing frontend integration tests and every release is pain in the ass ).
My backend code coverage is about 80% so not much can go wrong at this point.
So I added more code today and it looks like new feature is working but don’t know what the code I added 2 months ago exactly do.
The only thing I know is that it definitely needs refactoring ...
Being only backend dev / release manager / administrator/ dev ops in project is painful I need to deal with everything on my own 😔
At least client doesn’t care if it’s done in one week or in one month right now.1 -
if i work on PussyBranch to build up a feature, and DickBranch is my main branch so if i merge directly from Pussy into Dick and then work on Dick, and then switch to Pussy again then surely i wouldnt be able to commit to Dick because Pussy isn't filled up with the new code, right? I'd need to pull the latest code from Dick into Pussy branch. but what if i dont want to merge Dick into Pussy code? because what Dick contains, Pussy should not and that would cause anomaly and break uhh how do u call it, the purpose of the branch itself right. So if I want to work only on Pussy and commit just that segment of the new code into Dick, how do I do that? Do i have to force pushing Pussy code into Dick every time or can i do it without force command? serious answers only pls
also what alcohol is good for a more productive and longer hour coding sessions thx6 -
So what's up with some devs, QAs and managers that create bug tickets with little to no information on what is the actual bug? I can semi-understand in the case where you document it only for you to read later.
Fuck you if you think that a ticket with only a title saying "fix all the bugs for this release" or "this feature is not working" is an appropriate way of documenting a bug.
Fuck you even more if when you are being asked to provide more info to reproduce the issue so someone else can actually be sure it is fixed or not (environment, steps, expected result, actual result, etc.), you simply say that you don't have the time for it and documenting tickets is a waste of time.
Hiring YOU was a waste of time!4 -
Wish me luck. Looks like the feature I am developing is going to be late because QA doesn't feel like following the estimates we agreed on. We already identified that development was going to be the longest part of this whole effort and that QA was going to be relatively easy, but but no. Because this is the day we have to be "code complete", they don't want to test a relatively simple feature. In fact we had to talk them into even starting testing on it today. Even though regression day is Monday and they are basically going to be done testing their last ticket this morning. Like what the fuck were they going to do for the next 7-8 hours? They don't write any documentation. There are no reports to do. There are no meetings. Did they just want a virtual day off?
Edit: they are literally playing with people's careers here. This is not the first time I have had something delayed by QA even though they agreed that it was simple to test and it was delivered with enough time to fucking test. Then I get in trouble because of late delivery.6 -
Struggling
Started a new job not super long ago with the intention of "learning new tech" and so I get my wish, I'm thrown into a project as the LEAD ENGINEER
And my junior dev proceeds to run circles around me and I know literally nothing about what is going on in this project aside from the architectural / feature planning discussions I've had with marketing/junior
I've been trying to learn vuejs for what seems like weeks and weeks and I'm just not "getting it" I come from a strong oop php background and this paradigm is using tons of tech I know basically nothing about. Every time I talk to junior I get super depressed cause he's speeding along and I'm still completely clueless.. what the FUCK do I do6 -
Argh! (I feel like I start a fair amount of my rants with a shout of fustration)
Tl;Dr How long do we need to wait for a new version of xorg!?
I've recently discovered that Nvidia driver 435.17 (for Linux of course) supports PRIME GPU offloading, which -for the unfamiliar- is where you're able render only specific things on a laptops discreet GPU (vs. all or nothing). This makes it significantly easier (and power efficient) to use the GPU in practice.
There used to be something called bumblebee (which was actually more power efficient), but it became so slow that one could actually get better performance out of Intel's integrated GPU than that of the Nvidia GPU.
This feature is also already included in the nouveau graphics driver, but (at least to my understanding) it doesn't have very good (or none) support for Turing GPUs, so here I am.
Now, being very excited for this feature, I wanted to use it. I have Arch, so I installed the nvidia-beta drivers, and compiled xorg-server from master, because there are certain commits that are necessary to make use of this feature.
But after following the Nvidia instructions, it doesn't work. Oops I realize, xrog probably didn't pick up the Nvidia card, let's restart xorg. and boom! Xorg doesn't boot, because obviously the modesetting driver isn't meant for the Nvidia card it's meant for the Intel one, but xorg is to stupid for that...
So here I am back to using optimus-manager and the ordinary versions of Nvidia and xorg because of some crap...
If you have some (good idea) of what to do to make it work, I'm welcome to hear it.6 -
At work, how often do you create your own apps? As opposed to adding a new feature to an existing one?
I am thinking maybe the biggest difference between me and everyone else on my team is because I have a lot more experience creating my own apps.
So when I get a problem I tend to start by thinking how to create a new app for it, what would be the ideal way to solve the problem. And then if needed, figure out how to integrate it into an existing project.
Whereas everyone else thinks about how to solve a problem within the context (and constraints) of an existing app.17 -
So earlier my Windows 10 machine decided to crash to blue screen on me. First time I have seen a blue screen in 4 years. I thought, this sucks. I waited for it to reboot. I logged back in and saw it was busy doing "stuff". Then I heard the hardware attaching noise.
This is what I think happened. I think because I did an update the other day that it had installed new drivers. I think there may be some sort of driver A/B testing going on. So the blue screen gave Windows enough info to know which driver. Then when the machine restarted it either reverted to a known "good" driver or switched to an alternate.
I don't know if this is true, but it is a cool feature if it is. Do other OSes do stuff like that?6 -
I was tasked to evaluate wherever a customer could use an implementation of OTRS ( https://otrs.com/ )
Is it just me or is there no information on this site apart from <OTRS> will make your life better! <OTRS> will cure AIDS! <OTRS> will end world hunger!
This site is trying to use its fucking product name in every god damn sentence. <OTRS>. Everytime <OTRS> is mentioned it is fucking bold printed! My eyes are bleeding within 2 minutes of visiting this site.
I can't get any information about what excatly it is apart from their catchphrase: OTRS (again, bold. I'll refrain from putting it in <> from now, i think you got the point) is a customizable support desk software that manages workflows and structures communication so there are no limits to what your service team can achieve.
So, it's a support desk software you can customize. Great. What does it do?
"Whether you deal with thousands of inquiries and incidents daily [...] you’ll need digital structures that integrate standardized processes
and make communication transparent between teams and departments,
as well as for external customers."
Great, but what does it do?
"Reduce costs and improve satisfaction by structuring customer service communication with OTRS."
Great, BUT WHAT DOES IT DO?
"Manage incidents simply and uncover the data needed to make forward-thinking strategy decisions. OTRS is an ITSM solution that scales and adapts to your changing business needs."
W H A T D O E S I T D O ?!
Okay fuck that, maybe the product page has something to say.
Hm... A link on the bottom of the page says it is a feature list ( https://otrs.com/product-otrs/... )
Ah great, so i got a rough idea about what it is. Our customer wants a blackboard solution with a window you can pin to your desktop and also has a basic level of access control.
So it seems to be way to overloaded on features to recommend it to them. Well, let's see if can at least do everything they want. So i need screenshots of the application. Does the site show any of them? I dare you to find out.
Spoiler: It does not. FFS. The only pictures they show you are fucking mock ups and the rest is stock photos.
Alright, onwards to Google Images then.
Ah, so it's a ticket system then. Great, the site did not really communicate that at all.
Awesome, that's not what i wanted at all. That's not even what the customer wanted at all! Who fucking thought that OTRS was a good idea for them!
Fuck!5 -
Just got to test the app from the frontend team... Oh God why!!
5 minutes, found 5 bugs (c'mon testers!!)
Worst (and now it's a rant) why do designers insist on working with big screens and don't test it on a standard screen? You know? Those typical screens your users are using?
So, it looks great in a 24" screen but the focus is terrible in a 15.6" screen... No time to fix it... What should I tell the users? Works better at 85% zoom out? -_-
You just fucked up the main feature of the app! Congrats!!! The rest looks okay I guess3 -
I hate it when we are discussing a feature and they ask me "what do you think?" after they said how would they go about it and i mention that i would do it differently and think that my way may be longer now but can pay off in the long run and they decline it.
What i hate even more is that after some period they revesit their decision again and come to conclusion that my way is better and now we (i) need to rewrite it but without acknowledging that i said it then and was the best solution.
AMMA KILL SOMEBODY IN THIS BISH RIGHT TF NOW!!10 -
Your "feature" just became my problem. Your "great idea" is now my migraine. What you did in 300 lines, another team was already doing in 5.
The next time you `brew install...` on your laptop, you should fucking think that the infra team has to install those dependencies, on every server, too.
In less time than it took you to create your code, I could have given you several functions to call. I could have saved all of us weeks of work. Fucking ask cross-team before you cowboy code your next big idea please.
Got a problem you need to be solved, somebody else probably solved it, just fucking ask.6 -
A while a go, we got a Feature Request by our client, which was a bit of a stretch. and by a bit of a stretch i mean horrible shit which is totally unusable, a technical nightmare to implement with almost no accessable data.
well, the pm gave me the Ticket. when I First read it, I wanted to puke.
since the pm wasnt in a good mood, i just wrote a large comment on where to implement that Feature to be a much less pain in the ass.
many discussions with the pm and the Client later, i Had to implement it the way, they wanted. so i started.
after one and a half week, i was almost ready, just a few hours left and the nightmare would be over
what i didnt know is that the Client came over to discuss a few things with my Boss
suddenly my Boss walks in and asked, how much im ready
then He told me THE message
i should should Revert everything ive done the last 1 1/2 weeks and implement the Feature the way, i told was better
worst friday ever -
Updated to Windows 10 1803 (April Update) and I noticed a little button appearing near the search box in the task bar. Turns out to be a new feature called Timeline. I open it and it shows some excel files I had opened some weeks before.
That's very coo... HOW THE FUCK DOES IT KNOW WHAT I DID BEFORE I EVEN UPDATED WINDOWS???
Richard Stallman is right..6 -
I drop a pile from top of my head. Don’t bother to read.
About release:
When is release ? ( discussed 2 minutes ago )
Who will release ? ( there is always same person doing it )
What was added ?
What information add to clients about release ? ( it was always the same )
About bugs and features:
There is this bug.... ( without specifying)
It doesn’t work. ( there are 3 environments )
Is this ok ? ( clicking randomly )
Is this bug fixed ? ( without specifying )
Where is this feature ? ( while looking at webpage with feature )
How to use this ? ( not specifying what )
Where ? ( while clicking randomly )
When ? ( while scrolling calendar )
Why ? ( still clicking )
Where to click ? ( what I am doing here ? )
About meetings:
When is meeting ?
Where is meeting ?
Why we’re meeting?
Who will be there ? ( information in calendar )
I heard all of them at least once per month. Now I’m recovering at home and my friends are asking why I’m tired. -
We have a an existing legacy project full of sh*t. I am developing now an additional feature. What will you do if the one who will review your code is the one who developed this legacy project in the first place? @@#&#-$
-
What the hell is wrong with the browser on iOS....
For Christ sakes almost no input attributes work. I have a Sign Up feature that validates passwords with a pattern attribute; doesn't work, required attribute; doesn't work, input type number; doesn't work.
What the fuck is wrong with this thing. Even Internet Explorer knows what those attributes means. Absolute joke now i need to implement it manually. Fuck off apple.11 -
So I've spent the past 2 months or so integrating a payments provider with a terrible API, only to find that the provider is missing a core feature that they claimed to have in their sales pitch. I have no idea what will become of a large part of my work, it's so draining to work around a total garbage API6
-
Stop commenting out code blocks!
Either fix your shit or delete it.
I am open to argue what fixing may mean, as it is perfectly fine to make your broken code not reachable, e.g. via feature flags or skipping certain tests. Yet never ever should you comment those blocks!
So you say you want to keep it for historic reasons? You know, that is why we use version control! If you ever need certain functionality back, you can restore that state.
Each decent IDE also offers a local history where you can even restore code blocks that weren't even pushed or committed. So use that!
Commenting out test cases is a really bad habit, as you have no reminder that you shall restore it.
And no, a TODO and a FIXME won't count as a reminder as you have to actively look for them. And we all know how well that goes, don't we? (One time, I found a typo of a `TDO`. So even with a regular lookup for TODO, stuff will slip.)
Each test suite offers you ways to skip tests if there are valid reasons why they should not fail the build temporary and they offer colorful feedback. Yes, that means that your tests won't be green, but guess what: That's a feature! They shouldn't be.
That yellow is a fine reminder, aka warning!, that you should really fix your shit.
Commented code screams: "I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING!" and it confuses the hell out of other developers ("Was this commented because of debugging purposes and should be active again or can I safely delete this!?") and adds verbose crap to the code base.
If you find yourself to be in a place that you comment code a lot, I also argue that your workflow is broken.
When you are using a decent debugger, there shouldn't that much of a need to comment in and out a lot of code in order to reason about your code-base.3 -
I always write a Google Doc before I start developing a feature to help me think what and how should I implement it and so I can share it with the team.
It is possibly the most frustrating process of the whole development cycle because Word and Google Docs still manage to make it a fuckin ordeal to insert a simple image without bombing the whole text to hell. How is it that after almost 30 years of history it is still shit to write a document?8 -
To the managers and new developers.
Development, and Product Development is not a black-and-white game.
It is an entire spectrum. You cannot move to the next best version. Next best feature, or the next best app.
The only jump that you take is getting started. After that it is a walk across the entire spectrum. Things grow slowly, and steadily. Just keep an eye on the next improvement.
Study the analytics, improvise, focus your energies, and just move to the next shade.
Enough steps, and you will have what you want.
It requires planning, courage, determination, tactics, sticking together ,and above all patience.
Most importantly, get rid of the people who cannot think long, rush, and mess things up.1 -
they say everything "old" is better, but in programming, dependencies in C was a mess. Shut up. Sometimes C is a cult enforced by those who don't even write in C. Now I build my projects with Parcel in less than a second with no configuration. It uses a full-blown AST for everything. If I want more performance with similar DX, I use fastpack, bringing build time down to tens of milliseconds.
art? charli xcx, sophie xeon, death grips, just to name a few. they made things that weren't imaginable before, ultimately pushing music forward. Hendrix is good but they're just incomparable in terms of beauty, complexity and sophistication.
literature? every old book I read feature same conflicts. they are so similar it's almost boring to read them. meanwhile, Erlend Loe delivers a complex idea without using a conflict (!) and without any character changes. that's insane.
"older is better" is getting old. it's time for you to seek for some other reusable gibberish to insult what other people create.
finally, let me remind you that you, my friend, create nothing.46 -
Developed a feature 4 weeks ago with a lot of requirements from PO, even more from QA, wrote beautiful code/tests, was actually happy after deploy since everything worked beautifully.
Sales increased a lot because of this.
Story created in Jira today by mentioned PO: As a PO I want to have that feature removed because it doesn‘t work in IE9. PO decides so I had to do this.
So: What exactly is the best way to hide a body?3 -
I have a very annoying person in my team, who thinks he is the leader and is so full of himself that once he gets some idea he makes it final without listening to other's opinion, kinda anti-humble.
Today he was explaining that we are going to implement this feature and one of the member had a doubt which was legit so that guy started explaining it, but didn't really understood what the question was ( as he always does) he was heated up already as he was explaining the same thing again and again but it was nowhere near what the exact question was, by mistake I entered the conversation and tried to explain the question to him, he became so annoyed that he lost all his patient and shouted at me to shut up. Not only I felt bad but also found myself helpless in such situation i didn't know what to do, I was annoyed like anything, and now I think that I don't really know how to deal with annoying people such annoying and toxic people..6 -
We write our feature specifications in Gherkin, so it is clear to every member of the team (even nondevs GASP!) exactly what each feature should do.
SO WHY THE FUCK, AFTER BUILDING THE FEATURE, DO I GET REVIEWS FROM THE pRoDuCt MaNaGeRs, SHOWING ME THEY WANT SOMETHING DIFFERENT FOR THE FEATURE. YOU WROTE THE FUCKING FEATURE DID YOU HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART MID THOUGHT YOU IDIOT!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO SICK OF IT I'M SICK OF WORKING 12 HOURS ON A FRIDAY FOR YOUR STUPID SHIT2 -
!rant && POLL
A lot of people are asking for poll feature. There have been many debates. While reading those, I even thought we should probably ask a debate feature before poll.
Anyway you can actually create poll rant. Just gotta be creative and a bit organized like adults (hope we all are).
1) you ask your poll question as rant
2) you enter your poll choices as comments
3) people ++ their favorite choice comment (s)
Of course this is not a poll-poll feature so there are many lacking functions. But at least it works to certain extent.
Eg Question : What is your OS?9 -
Agile/Scrum is the worst project management style in software development.
Rather than focusing on delivering a feature or changes on the project, everyday there is always a meeting that you need to attend to, other than the daily huddle. And those meetings are none of your concern or why they needed you there
And my Product Owner and Scrum Master does not know even though how software development cycle works. When you discuss technical details or constraint to them, they either look confused or don’t know what to say and just say “If you need anything, always communicate or approach me” even you already told them the issue.
Or maybe we are doing it wrong. But it is been 5 years when they implement this Agile/Scrum and we are still bad at it.
Just ranting4 -
Agile is stupid.
You’re trying to build an application based on data that doesn’t exist yet, and that changes weekly; surely it makes more sense for the API to be built and in place before someone tries to create a front end?
The client decides they want an extra feature 1/2 way through which changes the way it should work yet again.
What you end up with is some rigid and poorly structured architecture, that might work - but how you have no time to refactor it to make it good, an account manager that doesn’t understand what the problem is, and a team of developers wondering wtf you were thinking when you wrote this pos4 -
Just give me anything BUT coding to work on and I'm instantly in the zone for coding. End of Year Review, access reviews for Audit, any other kind of paperwork, which is most of what my job is these days, and I have some brilliant insight into a problem on my back burner, or a brilliantly simple way to implement a feature I've been stewing on for weeks.
It's my procrastinating nature to not want to do the thing I HAVE to do.
Maybe I should volunteer for more paperwork?1 -
Pm: we need to add a feature to the app, how long will it take you?
Me: what is this "feature"?
Pm: we still polishing the idea, how long will it take you to add a feature to the app?
Me: bitch wtf? Get back to work!! -
I suggested we make a feature that has a checkbox that is greyed out and always selected. It would have words describing what the checkbox does. This would inform the user about how the feature works, but won't allow them to change that behavior.
So I am ready and willing to create user hostile software features. I am ready to work for Microsoft.1 -
Dashlane is the worst password manager to use. I was trying to set up categories and since it does not have a simple selection box change feature I had to grab almost 100 at a time to change. Unfortunately after changing them I realized I had a duplicate and I clicked on that one to delete it. The system was still selecting all 100 (it uses a slightly gray color to show what is selected rather than a clear check box type feature) and it deleted all 100 passwords. It never asked me a question or gave me an undo feature. The interface is very difficult to handle.
Further, to set up a second user and grant them access to a large number of passwords (in this case my wife I wanted to give her access to 128 passwords), you must click them one at a time and then when you set it up they cannot get their own master password. Very cumbersome.1 -
What is it about clients that provokes them to ask about the same feature every day? No, it’s not fucking done yet, I don’t have a team of devs under me who work overtime to finish it overnight. It’s not going to get done any faster if you keep fucking bothering me about it.
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PO: suggests a new feature to be implemented
My dev colleague almost always responds no matter what the feature is: 'it's simple to do'
Me: 'Dying inside'6 -
We have a web application that will be deployed to the client premises. Part of the agreement is that the full source code will be provided. Now my manager asked me to hide/restrict the usage of a certain feature, and should not be hackable even if we give the full source code. Gosh help me guys, I don't know what I'm doing here.3
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Someone on WhatsApp asked me did I like the new update or not ?
Well here is what I replied,
WHAT THE FUCK ?! NOOooo ! already there is Snapchat whose USP is this feature, Snapchat is Snapchat, then they introduced this feature on Instagram that's ok...but WhatsApp should be WhatsApp.
ALL I WANTED IS A SIMPLE PLAIN MESSAGING APP, THAT'S IT !
Now it's wasting my time more, earlier I just used to see Instagram & Snapchat stories in my free time BUT now !? I will see these fucking stories again here on WhatsApp too... BECAUSE I can't help it, it's in our human mind psychology too, we are curious beings, we are somehow bound to open that Status Tab when we will see a green dot ! If it's not true SEE THE NEWS ! NASA just found a whole new Solar System just ~40 light years away ! YES we are curious, we explore, we invent things.
I hope they will roll it back, but NO the ugly truth my friend is people will rant about and forget, and we will end up using it too, hate this seriously ! for instance the new iPhones have no 3.5mm audio jack, WTF ?! well say goodbye to my favourite ear buds ! and buy these FUCKING NEW Monstrously over priced bound-to-buy pair of earbuds if you need high quality audio out.
AND are we bound to be slaves and continue using these features because everyone else is doing so ? NO ! I will use whatever I like the most, I will go back to the roots, may be use those old school IMs and may be ask others to join it.6 -
@dfox @trogus: feature request: is there anyway to store on my profile a list of recently viewed rants? It can be for private use only.
There have been a bunch of times that I will be viewing a rant, go into safari to grab a link or find a photo, just to go back to devRant and iOS has reset the app and I can't find what that rant I was looking at. It's really frustrating.
I know getting iOS to keep the app state may be difficult but storing a list of recently viewed rants, while not the simplest, I would think is straight forward.7 -
GoLive for this big feature is set for Thursday. So the customer approaches me and asks can our team do it. Sure it can be done if everything goes perfectly, but... This means that the feature won't be tested, everything won't probably go perfectly (which it didn't because of customer selected third party api surprise nondocumented features (bugs)) and Thursday release is almost as dumb fucking idea as Friday release. I said it more nicely and I got:
"I don't agree with you"
from a person who has 0 understanding of what is going on and whose boss pays me to tell them what it needs in order to work and prosper.
And we had this fucking conversation three times. So basically he interrupted my coding that directly impacts the schedule in order to debate how fast things can be done. Don't these people understand that everytime you interrupt a software engineer the deadline is pushed by the same amount of time you waste of mine + 30minutes of refocus time to get back into the thing you were doing.
Best part was that the deadline was this magic date the guy pulled out of his ass without consulting the developer team and nobody really cared about the deadline =D
FUCK1 -
I'm having to use MS Word again today, and yet again I want to punch my computer in the balls, and frankly I could pull a better piece of software out of a pig's arse.
So there is a feature that automatically adds up the figures in a column to give you a total. Useful, right?
No. Because the total doesn't update automatically. There is even a setting somewhere to have it update before save, and when you turn this setting on, it sometimes updates before save depending on what mood it's in.
You can have it reliably update before you "print to pdf", but not before you "save as pdf".
Fine, there's probably another setting buried somewhere that actually works, but why the fuck is it not turned on by default? What kind of moron wants an automatic total that doesn't update automatically?
I first encountered this feature about 20 years ago, and in all that time none of the thousands of developers at MS has thought "this is shit, let's fix it."
But that's what a developer does, surely. They look at things and say "this is shit, let's fix it".
If you've been looking at something that's so obviously shit, and so easily fixed, for 20 years and not had any urge to fix it, you're not a developer, you're a cretin.
The stupidity cries out from the earth for vengeance.5 -
Here is mine.
So I have been working on a project for 2 months now at my company. Briefly, I describe it as the WordPress of the surveys (create, edit, share, tons of features). Last day, I had to implement one last feature in order to make everything working and as similar as possible with the final product. I had 10 minutes to do it (had to go home) and I was like "Tomorrow bro". Believe it or not, 10 minutes was what it took me to end this fckin' project, and go home on time like "Good job Man, relax it's friday now" :)
Thanks for reading ! -
FML, somebody here or somewhere wrote that al customers lie..
Just been a witnes to that.. Over skype (mind I reminded them to write to jira on several occasions so others can help if I am out of office) feature xy is not working.. I log in to server, I see no logs of person a doing anything with our system, let alone use the xy feature... Well duh, of course it doesn't work, it's not a freakin mind reader.. :/
Next time no help, no log checking, no nothing until they provide ss of what exactly they were doing.. :/ Fuuuuu....3 -
I was developing a project for the software engineering course. We we're building a sort of mips instructions simulator that would show you the path the signal takes while it's traveling in the CPU.
So after almost finishing everything, the professor asks us to add a voice over feature that would tell you what is happening while you go through the animation.
You can only understand this if you see it. It's very funny and stupid.
The website is http://mipssimulator.com
Make sure sound is on.
Edit: the site is kinda glitchy on mobile so try loading it on a computer for better results.5 -
A pm asked about a feature I was developing and I went on to show them what I got so far. Feature-wise almost finished, but it still needed to be polished and thoroughly tested, as such it wasn't merged yet. Weeks later - I couldn't finish it yet for unrelated reasons - there was great confusion about why the feature is not there as it had been billed to the customer already. So I gotta pull some sunshine out of my ass and bring it to the last release branch..1
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I absolutely love it when C# programmers who never learnt any language outside of their bubble discover C# is not the most feature up-to-date programming language. I am honestly annoyed by people who can read Java syntax but can't read ML syntax (because it is too 'clever' to be used in production). What a bunch of mediocre COBOL programmers!4
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So there is this project of my firm that is comepletly dependant on Facebook api, I've actually told it many times to managers at first but they've just waved their hands over it.
Now what didn't happen. Facebook data leak and the api being taking down ..juust a week before the project going public.
Our app is still not reviewed and not able to access the so vital api and there are actually many similar projects getting published (even Facebook Local greatly rivals to our app, actually killing it because they have native data... And we don't have any. )
I told them again. "Nah we will have this and this feature that makes it soo exceptionall."
And you are sitting here thinking if the salary you have asked for is still good enough to stay or to run away.
(Well, I am still getting some coding experience from this so that's why I stay, and oh yeah I have the backend repo only for myslef because except the frontend dev no managers knows what git is. This is how freedom feels. )2 -
When you use an Android app on daily basis, upgrades every time when you can, then you remove and reinstall it and get a very different UI and feature set. What kind of black magic is this?
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Why the fuck is debit cards that don't need a PIN for transactions even a thing? What is so difficult to understand or implement in a two factor authentication? Like do these companies have meetings where some fucktard proposes removing a crucial security feature and the others just nod approval?6
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When Icriticize a paid service for taking away or not providing functionality for all users equally but then a user comes back defending them with some BS reason...
Ok... I'll just continue helping myself only...
@nnee
Me:
1. Can you put the New books tab with back in the bottom, scrolling down into the New section in the front page is annoying. At least make it a setting?
2. Where's the # of books read stat in Android?
Blinkist: Hi thanks for your message! The best way to view the newest titles on Android is to do just as you mention – scroll down to reveal the New section. As for BiB stats on Android, we're working on releasing this feature (it's only live on iOS at the moment).
Me: Hm... I liked the older way better. Faster and can tell when it was added. The problem is sometimes still new books don't refresh and I need to login out to get it to update. Also I notice sometimes the list changes randomly I think. One day a new book is there. The next day it's gone.
BiB stats have been in iOS for a year now? How hard is it to put it in Android. Personally it only took me a day to find out what my total is as I can write a program to do it so to me I don't understand how this could be taking so
Some user: Priorities and often it’s strategy for future features...
Me: you take away useful functionality and and can't release a feature that's been on the iOS version for a year already... fine,,, I'll just take it as a challenge... that I've mostly solved... for myself...3 -
How do you make up new cool features for your platform?
well you don't because UX and PM think it best to look at competitors and implement whatever shit they come up with.
once, someone came up with a cool feature and some basic prototype for it and they ignored it. the competitor thought of it years later and did it. when they did it, suddenly its a priority at our company to do it as well.
sure, why be the first to do the feature. im sure being unique and creative is overrated not like our profit comes from user subscriptions.
Some recent PM decisions similar to the one above are driving me crazy, its not like u dont know what to do we literally have a ton of ideas so stop ignoring them and prioritizing being a knock off app of someone else. FUCK YOU. -
When your bug fix corrects an issue that is a year old and customers freak out because they do not not how the feature is actually suppose to work. Management: you should of wrote a test to detect the reverse effects of your bug correction. I told them what the effects would be and to have customer support on stand by with the corrective actions to take if they were concerned.1
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In the new job as "Consultant", one of my duties is to maintain the website. Now, the website is based on PHP 5.6 (which they are still using mail method) and without git or sg-git and of course, it is based on cPanel.
Now, I update the website in real time i.e. working on cPanel itself. This is because I don't do for the front end, I do it for SEO. So one day, they reported a "feature" as a bug and assigned it to solve me, I took my time solved it, they did not like it, I reverted it back and I had to listen to a lecture because I did not test it.
Imagine old "wise" ass hats giving a lecture which they do not know about in the first place, 12 of them precisely, yeah that's what happened to me. -
Today I will talk about Android OS being stupid.
Android lets u as a user move installed apps to external storage = microSD card.
However what is stupid about it is that only a small part of the app will be moved. For example, if you have an app taking 400 MB of storage, then "moving" it will move only about 100 MB of data to microSD card, while the remaining 300 MB of data will remain on the internal storage...
In Android 11 this is still not improved. Imagine having 11 versions of OS over 11 years and never making a crucial feature work properly. Meanwhile app sizes grow ever larger
Disappointing.5 -
I'm developing an app for a not so mobilefriendly website.
I do not coorporate with the webmaster, yet, so I need to sort of reverse engineer my way around everything (basically just one feature.. xD).
It's a website for people who likes to fish, and they *have* to submit their catches. So, when people submit their catches via the form and click "Submit", the URL they are sent to goes like
http://url.tld/submit_catch.asp/...
I can't figure out if that is a POST request, or what it is.
Somehow, I need to submit a catch from the Android App, and all I currently got is that URL.
What do I need to look into to solve my issue here? Any help appreciated :)22 -
Good code is a lie imho.
When you see a project as code, there are 3 variables in most cases:
- time
- people / human resources
- rules
Every variable plays a certain role in how the code (project) evolves.
Time - two different forms: when certain parts of code are either changed in a high frequency or a very low frequency, it's a bad omen.
Too high - somehow this area seems to be relentless. Be it features, regressions or bugs - it takes usually in larger code bases 3 - 4 weeks till all code pathes were triggered.
Too low - it can be a good sign. But it should be on the radar imho. Code that never changes should be reviewed at an - depending on size of codebase - max. yearly audit. Git / VCS is very helpful here.
Why? Mostly because the chances are very high that the code was once written for a completely different requirement set. Hence the audit - check if this code still is doing the right job or if you have a ticking time bomb that needs to be defused.
People
If a project has only person working on it, it most certainly isn't verified by another person. Meaning that only one person worked on it - I'd say it's pretty bad to bad, as no discussion / review / verification was done. The author did the best he / she could do, but maybe another person would have had an better idea?
Too many people working on one thing is only bad when there are no rules ;)
Rules. There are two different kind of rules.
Styling / Organisation / Dokumentation - everything that has not much to do with coding itself. These should be enforced at a certain point, otherwise the code will become a hot glued mess noone wants to work on.
Coding itself. This is a very critical thing.
Do: Forbid things that are known to be problematic in the programming language itself. Eg. usage of variables in variables, reflection, deprecated features.
Do: Define a feature set for each language. Feature set not meaning every feature you want to use! Rather a fixed minimum version every developer must use and - in case of library / module / plugin support - which additional extras are supported.
Every extra costs. Most developers don't want to realize this... And a code base that evolves over time should have minimal dependencies. Every new version of an extra can have bugs, breakages, incompabilties and so on.
Don't: don't specify a way of coding. Most coding guidelines are horrific copy pastures from some books some smart people wrote who have no fucking clue what you're doing and why.
If you don't know how to operate on people, standing in an OR and doing what a book told you to do would end in dead person pretty sure. Same for code.
Learn from mistakes and experience, respect knowledge from other persons, but always reflect on wether this makes sense at this specific area of code.
There are very few things which are applicable to a large codebase on a global level. Even DRY / SOLID and what ever you can come up with can be at a certain point completely wrong.
Good code is a lie - because it can only exist at a certain point of time.
A codebase should be a living thing - when certain parts rot, other parts will be affected too.
The reason for the length of the comment was to give some hints on what my principles are that code stays in an "okayish" state, but good is a very rare state -
every time I run into some issue in rust and spend days googling and asking a billion AI chat bots turns out it was rust that was wrong
I'm so exhausted
do they have brain worms
nobody considers "hey maybe this feature isn't in yet" (and actually they'll argue against it being a feature and you should feel bad at coming up with it)
they're just like "you're doing it wrong!"
YOU HAVE ALL THE INFORMATION TO INFER THE TYPE AND YOU DID INFER THE TYPE YET YOU TELL ME I NEED TO ANNOTATE THE TYPE BUT YOU'VE INFERRED IT AND YOU CANT TELL ME WHY I NEED TO ANNOTATE IT
And I love how suddenly you can convert a Result object using `as` which is a keyword reserved only for primitives, so say the docs... and it works (and works at runtime as well). because the type was never wrong. you fucking inferred it. but you're bitching at me that you need an annotation. when you don't.
remember when languages were made by people that actually liked coding instead of this clout-chasing nonsense. that's what I'm blaming this on12 -
So, I encountered a classic case of the infamous "it works on my machine" excuse today. 🤦♂️ Seriously, folks, can we please put an end to this lazy and unprofessional behavior?
Picture this: I had just completed a feature in my code and passed it on to the QA team for testing. Confident that everything was running smoothly on my local environment, I expected a smooth sailing experience. But boy, was I wrong!
The QA team began testing the feature on different environments, and that's when the chaos ensued. What worked seamlessly on my machine seemed to transform into a monstrous bug fest on theirs. Panic set in, and I couldn't help but feel a mix of embarrassment and frustration.
Lesson learned: testing code thoroughly across various environments is crucial. No, seriously, it's an absolute must! That "it works on my machine" excuse is just a ticking time bomb waiting to explode in your face.
From now on, I pledge to dedicate more time to thorough testing and consider the diverse environments our code will encounter. Let's save ourselves and our colleagues the headache and embarrassment caused by such oversights. Together, we can put an end to the reign of the "it works on my machine" excuse once and for all!7 -
!rant
Python is a language I love to use. But after using a typed language I just so wanted that feature in Python. And guess what, there's already a project that does that - mypy! Static typing for Python. Just wow!1 -
Test A succeeds when run solo. Test A fails when run in conjunction with Test B. Obviously, some kind of messy state that isn't isolated per test.
I realize what it is, so I add a new feature to address it.
Test still fails, it had nothing to do with that.
I finally realize what it was. One liner fix.
Yay for a new (useless?) feature that isn't getting backed out. -
I've got a bit funny situation.
I wanted to make small application to speed up my dad's job, app is about duplicating models in X website (I don't want to say directly what website).
So I started by checking it has API, Yup, It has, but you need OAuth ID, to get it you need to write to support.
So I did it, my mail was something like that: "Hello, can I get access to your API, I want to make app to duplicate models with same settings, Thanks"
I've got an answer like that "Hello, our website doesn't have duplicating feature."
My reaction was: Wtf? I know it doesn't have that feature, That's why I want to make it. How did he get hired as technical support?
Maybe it's not the most exciting story, but I thought it could be intresting :) -
feature request / rant: there sbkukd be no posting new rants unless you have a minimum amount of +1. Maybe it's 10, or 25. but I've noticed the vast majority of people posting repeated memes, gifs, and overall irrelevant stuff are people with 0-5 +1. they should be required to post comments and be around for a bit to understand what devrant is before clogging up the feed.8
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The display power savings feature on Intel GPU drivers is retarded. It reduces backlight brightness when you're viewing dark content and pumps it back up when you have something white on the screen. This is the complete opposite of what you need for keeping the image viewable with minimum backlight brightness.
The dark parts of the dark image can be kept the same brightness by reducing the backlight, but the white text you're reading will actually be darker, so you need to manually set the display brighter. And then you need to reduce brightness when you switch to a white window because now that's too bright. And as a bonus, the backlight brightness will keep adjusting when you change windows, which is super distracting.1 -
*While designing the native app for a web application*
Me: So this feature in the app will basically be the same as Feature1 in the web app, correct?
Client: That's exactly right.
*Presenting the new app to the client*
Client: Why is this feature not behaving like the Feature2 in the web app?
Me: You said you wanted it like Feature1
Client: What? No, it must behave like Feature2
Please help1 -
Started a new role as a front end developer working with React, happy that i finaly won't have to work with wordpress anymore, having a great hope that I will learn from the best with my team, and then ... COVID-19 ... I have to work from home
first task, implement a feature on a react front end build with react boilerplate, first time seeing this repo and dispair quickly took over, there is no documentation except for clone and install, the code is a mess, the console is filled with errors and warnings ...
I did what I could, but it was not enought, my n+1 didn't complain but if I was him i'd fire my ass with no regret, now I understood why almost all my collegues are working as a backend devs.
I don't fear being fired, I fear the feeling of being not good, feeling useless, each morning I stare at the code and I become illiterate, I can't even touch a keyboard, now I don't know what to do, fixing this shitty app, trying to build something with react boilerplate and try to understand how the data flow, or continue my endless tutorial hell .1 -
Question: I completed a feature on separate branch. Since I'm not allowed to merge things on the master branch (only pm is allowed to) I open a pull request.
However, PM has decided that he will only accept PRs which can be automatically rebased & merged.
So now i opened my PR and PM says that GitHub complains that the branches cannot be automatically merged.
So I rebase the branch - push and tell him to try again. But the same issue - GitHub won't merge the PR. So I try again - rebase the feature branch onto master which runs me through the same rebase steps as on the last try. I successfully complete this one too and push. But still - GitHub won't swallow the PR.
Anybody an idea what could've went wrong here?6 -
Fuck you Microsoft for adding so many unnecessary fetures that nobody Needs/wants to use and which also slow down my pc.
I am specifically talking About that sily history-feature which is present for a few months now.
Guess what? I don't need it! Why? BECAUSE I DON'T USE EDGE SO THERE IS NO HISTORY TO LOAD. I DON'T USE (NEITHER I WAN'T TO) YOUR SLOW PHOTOS APP TO SEE IT IN THE WINDOWS HISTORY. I DON'TUSE ANY OF YOOUR SILLY INBUILT UWP APPS.
Since the update which added this feature, my pc is like 2 times slower, because it loads the whole last-5 months history.
Hey, thank you for nothing!1 -
Was wondering what kind of workflow you use.
My team is currently a big unorganized chaos...
Our manager wants us to take the form of:
Feature idea -> Design -> Build -> Test -> Train (explain to users how to use it) -> Deploy
The `Train` step is something rather odd to me, as that would mean teaching every single employee how to use the product we're making.
Wouldn't it just be better to skip the `train` section (and maybe use some kind of wiki?) and try to make everything as clearly labeled and obvious as possible?6 -
my boss on phone today, after a huge task list received these days:
- it would to build this "find my friends" feature in our existing app to boost downloads and reviews
- but i can't rebuild what Apple did.
- well why not?
- because i'm one guy, they are Apple and the rules don't apply to them
- ok but there are other apps that does this
- but they are not alone
- ok keep trying it must be a way
- is it urgent?
- no but it shall be done3 -
Anti-features need to be fought with fire (metaphorically speaking).
This means they must be eliminated, not just made optional.
Why? Because an optional anti-feature is just one step away from a mandatory anti-feature.
For example, "secure" booting: https://youtu.be/vvaWrmS3Vg4?t=750 (Jody Bruchon)
Another example are disguised remote kill switches, such as add-on signing ( https://digdeeper.club/articles/... ). It started as optional and people were able to opt out, and everyone accepted it because no one expected what would come next.
All that was left was removing the ability to opt out, and then Mozilla has control over which extensions users are allowed to use.
For years, this feature sat dormant and users did not know of its existence. But in early May 2019, the metaphorical thread snapped and an expired certificate remotely disabled all extensions, wasting millions of man-hours of productivity.
From the digdeeper.club article:
"The funny thing is, the whole point of the extension prison was allegedly to increase security - and yet today, all security addons got disabled because of it! Shows how freedom always has to trump over security or it ends up in a disaster like this."
Evil needs to be nipped in the bud before it can flourish.2 -
Goddamned apple. "Just works" my ass.
My girlfriend's 2014 MBP told her an update had already downloaded and she had no choice but to install it, which doesn't bother me. Now, though, it tries to update, then fails, and tells you to run diagnostics. Diagnostics says nothing is wrong, and says to contact support and it boots a minimal version of the OS that only runs a minimal version of safari. You try to access the chat feature and it never fully loads the chat interface. I can probably restore it, but I wanna know what was wrong. It's a really expensive brick right now.3 -
Dev planning
- set timeline for feature for 2 weeks
- share timeline with everyone involved
- project manager calls and says it's taking too long
- dev adjusts timeline to 1 week
- project manager call next day asks for a new feature to be included in the 1 week timeline
What the f*** is wrong with these ppl. People don't seem to get the concept of schedules, timelines and organizing work. It's not like there is an abundance of resources (only few devs available ) with limited budget and salaries -
Hi devRant community,
First of all, I'm so grateful and thankful for being part
of this awesome community. CHEERS!
I just wanna ask some advices from my super kind and awesome
pile of developers, what is the best thing to do if you're
stucked between creating a certain feature and a raging
girlfriend. I mean, my head is aching. I don't know what to do.
She needs time, but my first love which is programming also
needs much more of my time.
#devRantRocks3 -
I need to add new feature into the program which I wrote years ago so I start digging up the source code. The project is written in a language which I no longer code in.
That code is really poorly written with most of them don't have tests. I also find out that previous self is really a genius since he can keep track of huge project with almost no documentation.
To make matter worst, there are unused components (class,feature) in the source code. "Current me" have a policy of "just adding only a feature you need and remove unused feature" but it seem the "previous me" don't agree with the "current me".
The previous me also have the habit of using writing insane logic. I can remember what particular class and methods is doing but I can't figure out the details.
For example one method only have 5 line of code but it is very hard to figure out what those do.
The saving grace is that he know the important for method signature and using immutable data structure everywhere.
I was under the influence of caffeine and have a constant sleep deprivation at the time (only sleeping about 4 hour every day) so I can't blame him too hard.
I can't blame him too hard, right?
Could someone invent a time machine already? Invent time machine not to save the world but to save the developers from himself.4 -
Man, I think teaching is sooo hard...
it seems I can only start from two points: or I suppose the person is rock dumb and start sentences like "you know what top means right?"
(this is especially true because I'm not in a English speaking country and all of my references are in English (cuz since I learned it, I think it's easier to find good content in English))
or I go like:
"you only have to create a branch with the feature, the a class that implements the X interface to do this"
when the person doesn't even know how to make a function.
And now, I could convince the boss git is important and we should use it (I'm a intern). Result is: I need to teach git (git above all things, I have to teach git) to the other intern because the two interns will be responsible for taking care of the repos.
Not saying that I will fuck up, but leaving the repos to the interns, is this really a good idea 😂4 -
Question for devs who work in large multi-team environments:
A) What is your code review process like? Does a senior review it once and then it's off to QA or do you have "levels" of approval?
B) If you're launching a feature that depends on another team how are you coordinating it? Do you just talk over a ticket and then hit merge and deploy at the same time or like what's your process like?
C) What CI/CD tool do you use? Also what code hosting platform do you use? Github/GItlab/etc.
D) Are you currently happy with the CI tool you're using? If not what are some common issues you're facing?5 -
The moment, when you just about start a demo on your project and the code is not working at all, is pretty awkward. What makes it worse is that even the master branch is useless. The good thing is that noone noticed it, since the demod feature worked well.1
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I noticed a bug on devrant app on Android. Or is it a feature? Haha.
When you comment on a rant and then press Modify to change your comment, when you edit and save the edited comment you get to the updated one. If you press back you get to the previous one (not updated comment). If you try to reopen the rant you commented you see only the updated one.
So....here's a bug. What do I win?4 -
I've gone through so many tiling wm this semester and can't figure out what I like best...
i3, bspwm, xmonad, windowchef, herbstuffwm, awesomewm, fvwm, etc.
I love the cleanliness and productivity aspect of them compared to something like Windows and it's floating/snap feature. Awesomewm looks like a good choice but the config scripting is quite verbose.
So many choices! Probably doesn't help I want to keep it consistent across my laptop and 3 monitor setup (1 21:9, 2 16:9).4 -
So I'm on PTO for a week, and there is some feature for which I gave the estimations to the other team. That team thinks that eastimates are high and I'm getting pinged to think about it.
First of all they did the overriding of some feature which was required by our team without our knowledge and now when we got know what they did, they are asking us to do the work. I have an estimate and yes they are higher than expected because this feature is on their systems and I don't have complete understanding of it. This is ridiculous though but still I think that I'm wrong somewhere but I know this work is not easy for me, that's why estimations are high.
I'm on leave, I'm not supposed to be working anyway even if it's a small clarification.
Adding more here, that guy tagged another person from my team to do the work as I'm on leave. This guy did some work before too. But this is insane. HOW THE FUCK YOU EXPECT US TO DO IT FOR YOU!! YOU FUCKED IT UP!!!
I feel scared, what if the other guy can actually do the work, people will think I'm just stupid.:(((8 -
testing feature: that is not what the specs say this how this is suppose to work. so, I write a bug report.
conversation with developer goes as follows
developer: this is not a bug. sends the bug report back.
me: the specs say it is a bug. I resubmit the bug.
developer: sends it back saying that it has been changed in the new specs.
me: how do I get the new specs?
developer: it is on the server, go ask your boss on where ecaxtally on the server they are. then, he closes the bug report.1 -
is it necessary to have cherry picking a part of git branching/release process?
we have 3 branches : develop, release and master.
currently every dev works on feature as follows : they make a branch out of develop, write code, raise pr against develop, get it reviewed and merge back to develop. later the release feature list is generated, and we cherry pick all the release related commits to release branch, and make a prod build out of release branch. finally, the code is moved to master and rags are generated accordingly.
so the major issue with this process is feature blocking. as of now, i have identified 4 scenarios where a feature should not be released :
1. parallel team blocker : say i created a feature x for android that is supposed to go in release 1.2.1 . i got it merged to develop and it will be cherry picked to release on relase day. but on release day it is observed that feature x was not completed by the ios dev and therefore we cannot ship it for android alone.
2. backend blocker : same as above scenario, but instead of ios, this time its the backend which hasn't beem created for the feature x
3. qa blocker : when we create a feature and merge it to develop, we keep on giving builds from develop branch adter every few days. however it could be possible that qa are not able to test it all and on release day, will declare thaf these features cannot be tested and should not be moved to release
4. pm blocker: basically a pm will add all the tickets for sprint in the jira board. but which tickets should be released are decided at the very late days of sprint. so a lot of tasks get merged to develop which are not supposed to go.
so there's the problem. cherry picking is being a major part of release process and i am not liking it. we do squash and merges, so cherry picking is relatively easy, but it still feels a lot riskier.
for 1 and 2 , we sometimes do mute releases : put code in release but comment out all the activation code blocks . but if something is not qa tested or rejected by pm, we can't do a mute release.
what do you folks suggest?10 -
I love being a consultant, and I love my job. However, I’ve been working with this client for the past few months and the past few weeks have been so draining. 90% of the people at the client’s side are super nice people, and then there’s this one person that just barks orders at us whenever a tiny thing is broken. Everything is urgent, everything is top priority, and we need to drop whatever we’re doing to fix what they deem urgent. I am currently pretty much the only dev doing both support and feature development at the same time and I am getting mentally very tired.
Whenever something is broken we get shit feedback, but for all our efforts there’s never any positive feedback. Mind you, the project isn’t even publicly accessible yet, it’s in a “alpha” phase where there are only a handful of users testing the program.
How do you guys deal with people like this?3 -
Computer games is always been a on a great demand. As demand increases, production also increases. Gaming industry has been on a rise since the 19th century. The first computer game "Space Wars" in 1962 gained a large success. Since then, the evolution in the gaming industry is thrilling. Currently, we have access to many immersive games. With the introduction of AR and VR, the gaming industry is going to take a great burst in business. Don't you believe after decade the games would be so advanced that it would be so much life like. According to the predictions, after a hundred years, games would be vastly different from what we play today, realistic feature would be a sidekick for them. A time will come when the games would reach a singularity where the characters would have consciousness. Isn't that like our real world, as if we are the characters in a advanced game of some advanced beings. What if it is true? Scientists are doing a intensive research on this field to find a clue, whether we are in a game or not. This is the so called "Simulation Theory". Some clues in relation to this would be worth noting. The flower are following a series to have their petals. To be precise Fibonacci series is the base to the no of petals in a flower. (Fibonacci Series: 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 34 55.....) Flowers would either have 3 or 5 or 8 petals, but no flower is having a number of petal which is not following this series. Isn't it interesting, there is no brain in flower, even then how could a flower decide, how many petals it will contain? Sometimes, it feels like there is some kind of computer code is responsible for this. We will discuss about it furthur.16
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You know what feature about macOS I just don't get? Notification center. I don't know what it is about it, but it just seems kinda out of place. Maybe because an app's notifications aren't cleared when it's opened? It's just not a feature I use.2
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My favorite thing, when your boss makes up a feature in their head and is angry that you didn't magically read their mind and implement it. I'm like a computer, I do exactly what you tell me, nothing more, nothing less, dummy.
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Currently learning go and I’m really enjoying it. It’s been a while since I learnt a new programming language and the experience is different to what I remember. I’m reading an o reilly book and when about how they implemented a common feature of programming I’m like oh no they didn’t. I think this is what normal feel when they read celebrity gossip. Hash tag goto.2
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I actually debugging a feature i made..
And i just realize well, this project is already 8 months old and i cant remember what other features i made. -
Sometimes I genuinely wonder what the thought process of some people is...
git checks out feature-X branch
git creates new branch off of it to work on something that has absolutely nothing to do with feature X
then opens a PR back into feature-X
Me: this has nothing to do with feature X.. i think you meant to branch off of develop and PR back into develop, no?
Them: no it was intentional .. feature-X will eventually end up on develop so I thought we'd get both features on develop.
I'm not even mad and this isn't a rant, I'm just really confused 🙂4 -
What the hell kind of tool is Gitlab? I just want to automatically backmerge hotfixes from master to development. Even fucking Bitbucket had a checkbox to enable this. But not Gitlab, no, you better create a pipeline job in your already unreadable, overcrowded pipeline yml, but oh, the checked out repo in the pipeline is a detached head and you cant push with the user that checks out there. So what, just use a project acess token which revokes after a year breaking your task and then switch origin amd branch manually. But your token-user can't push to protected branches, so create a merge request instead, which requires approvals, making the automated step no longer automated.
But dont worry, you can just use the gitlab api to overwrite the approval rules for this MR so it requires 0 approvals. But to do so you must allow everyone to be able to overwrite approval rules therefor compromising security.
And so you made a feature that should effectively be a checkbox a 40+ line CI job which compromises your repo security.
which nuthead of an architect is responsible for the way gitlab (and its CI) is designed?6 -
Explain why a feature or request is a shite idea to your manager but don't accept 'well that's what the client wants' as an answer. Insist the useless manager twat should earn his money and not ruin the project.
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Is there anything like a reverse search engine, that let's you enter e.g. some js code and it tells you what language feature has been used? Imagine you see syntax you've never used before and don't know what it's called or what it does but would like to know more about it.7
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When you have to implement a search feature and could write down the SQL in half a minute, but instead you spend the whole afternoon figuring out how to do it with the ORM in place, and finally end up with 15 lines of poorly performing Java code instead of 3 lines of plain and simple SQL, then you really understand what the phrase "ORM is the Vietnam of Computer Science" means.
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I think one of the great things about this app is how we handle bug reporting. Any time someone posts about a bug, people independently do extensive tests to determine the extent of the bug (or at least what devices are affected), and people nearly always give detailed replication steps. I think this is a great feature of this community1
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Having a question regarding build number semantics (Im working on android app for that matter)
My current app build which is released is 5.3.6 (build number 94)
I already merged one feature to develop but haven't released it.
I also finished working on another feature but haven't merged it to develop yet.
Now my question is should I make a new build (5.4.0 with build number 95) and just merge to master, then release to google play (it would contain both two features)
Or should I make a new build 5.4.0 bn 95, merge to master, release it. And then make another build for the second feature 5.5.0 bn 96 and release that as well?
My reasoning would be to go with 2 separate builds and versions (in case my second feature messes up, I can revert it and also it will be easier to manage versions).
But then what about users: will they receive two updates from google play or only one (the latest version) ?3 -
Useless language feature #1: specify kind in explicit expression type annotations that you insert to guide the type inference engine.
How did I work on this for 6 months without realizing that the kind of a value's type is always the kind of types because that's literally what the kind of types means?2 -
Question: How do you guys charge your clients? I have had an hourly rate for quite sometime now, but never have I been able to use it since I do not know how to calculate it.
What I usually do is charge a fixed fee and charge on top of a feature is requested,
or I charge a monthly fee for long term contacts and charge on top if any additional feature is requested.
I want to try out hourly charge but since most of my clients are online, I do not know how it will work since the client can believe that I am simply adding additional hours or delaying work causing the hours to increase. (Most online clients are new to my services, unlike clients I meet offline, online can be less trusting)8 -
While being an intern I had to make a finance system, no requirements except for the fact that it has to invoice the right person...
As soon as it was seemingly done, I'd go to the customer and he'd just say "why isn't x in there? This isn't what I meant! Where is y feature? Why does it work like this and not like that?" etc...
I had 0 experience, and was just told to make stuff as I went, horrible experience and truly the most frustrating project I've ever done. -
Github Actions.
A nice feature that can drive you nuts.
"GITHUB_EVENT_PATH: The path of the file with the complete webhook event payload. For example, /github/workflow/event.json."
"github.event_path: The path to the full event webhook payload on the runner."
Well guess what? These fucking variables are completely useless since the path in them is non-existent.
Fortunately /github/workflow/event.json works...but for how long?
Also using header Accept: application/vnd.github.v3+json to download a zip file is masochism.4 -
It has to be Keybase.
It is exactly what I need - A secure yet practical cloud storage, where only you own the crypto key, with the added bonus of maintaining a blockchain-based identity online, with proof system and all.
Also has a secure PKI-Based E2E chat when I want to talk to someone about something I don't want the general government to necessarily know.
Definitely recommend the service! Even with the odd decision to include an option of a Lumen crypto wallet or whatever, you can just ignore that feature if you're not into it and it doesn't slow you down.2 -
Why do I see so many developers in the game community asking if a <insert tool> is usable for making a game? (I see it a bit here too for language and framework suggestions.)
Then I started thinking that these people either don't know what they want to do or they don't research the tools to find out what the capabilities are. Yes a certain percentage don't have a clue and are asking out of complete nativity.
However, as a developer I have always looked into features I think I need and base decisions on that. Often times spending a couple of days to play with the tool. Learn by doing.
Then I got a bit philosophical. Are the people asking these questions because their value system is based upon collectivism rather than merit? They will be in for a rude awakening when they cannot finish a project on time or at all when a feature is not there.
I get it on some level though. Sometimes we gotta know if something is complete shit.3 -
New feature request that could be unecessary by client just sticking to one of 4 different very similar input formats instead of many off the cuff formats, that conflict and i cant guess let alone a computer. But i present an outline idea of the solution with his specs
I didnt complain just told him what needs to change and what our constraints will be how the info is interpretted etc
Client says "dont spend time on code for that feature.. stick to other original work for now" ! omg hes getting it! Sweet. I only wasted an hour this time, and if he does want the feature, we have an agreed spec for it. We can get back to handling the customer level shit and maybe he can make some more money finally.
Scope creep plus 0, me plus one. Scope creep still in thr lead by a lot. Oh well. Still, this guy is getting more tolerable -
Can someone tell me why the fuck is it so hard to choose where to install electron apps? Selecting installation directory is a default feature in pretty much anything installable. Is electron somehow above that? Is clicking the two a extra buttons to choose a second drive too mainstream nowdays? What? Why? I use Atom, VS code, postman, cycligent, boostnote among others . The idea is good, the apps look beautiful and responsive. But bloated as fuck. Atom alone takes 1.4Gb! And I am ok with it! Really I am! But why the fuck not let me install it in a drive where I have 70% of space free and instead make me use my crammed SSD? Why? WHY?1
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I wonder how many github issues have been closed by asking the author to implement the feature they've requested for. In the past, I was confident my issue will be resolved by opening a new one when there's no answer in earlier questions. I can't tell whether the nature of my questions advanced or whether it's a new trend. But I've opened maybe 4/5 issues in recent memory, and each time, the collaborators suggest the feature is one I should contribute to their project by implementing. Isn't this their job as maintainers? I'm already working on something that barely gives me breathing space. I encountered a challenge using your library, and your idea of helping is that I dissent from my own trajectory, acquaint with your project /how to implement what I want, wait for it to get merged etc, before continue what I originally intended. Do they think that's worth it?
Is it just me or is this a common occurrence, lately?17 -
Hello everyone. I need your help and suggestions. I submitted an app to the Apple app store and got this response.
___________________________
Your app or metadata includes an account registration feature, which is considered an access to external mechanisms for purchases or subscriptions to be used in the app.
To resolve this issue, please remove the account registration feature and any other fully qualified links to your site that could indirectly provide access to these mechanisms, such as links to web pages for support, FAQs, product or program details, etc.
____________________________
My app only has a signup form that signs the user up on Firebase. What are my options? Is a simple signup form not allowed in iOS apps? This just does not make any sense to me. Please let me know what you would do.5 -
!rant
OMG fuck yeah!
Today I was workin' on my CSS framework, made a couple of cool functions for generating hsla() colors with a customizable lightness and opacity. Using calc() for multiplying the default lightness by the value passed in parameter to the function.
"It's working perfectly in Chrome and Edge, cool! Now let's check in Firefox, but if it's okay on Edge, I'm pretty confident..."
Except, that's a failure: https://bugzilla.mozilla.org/show_b...
At that point, I started to rant alone. Properly. Like: "why this feature is still not implemented, people are waiting for it since YEARS!! Fuckin' browsers war!!!"
I was already thinking to drop a big angry post on here, when I noticed something : https://developer.mozilla.org/en-US...
So I update Firefox Developer Edition and, IT WORKS!
This feature was needed since years and the FF team brings it just when I need it. What was the chance ? I feel happy :)
Conclusion: sometimes ranting is the easy way. Calm down, try harder and you can find the solution!1 -
Best part for me is when you see the final product. I do not mean once you're done working on the entire project (which is never true, always more to do! xD) but when you add a feature and it works.
Actually seeing it work, that gives me such a good, fulfilling feeling.
That has always been what attracted me to programming, or.. the main thing. -
What do you do when you give someone a feature ticket and they come back and the code just isn't what you expected?
Like to you how they did it, assuming they actually finished, is very hacky and not well designed/thought out?
And ur going to need to cleanup a lot of their code? And explaining to them how to do it is just not worth the time and will take longer then just doing it urself?
They just don't seem very bright or able to "get it".
I guess how do you go from a developer to a manager? And deal with devs they don't seem to be writing code they're up to your standards/expectations?9 -
So recently, one of my coworkers had some issues with their configurations on Visual Studio : To test our feature, we have a specific setup that I won't describe here. Thing is, it's not a simple localhost. Remember that.
The issue of the configuration was on that feature : they went back on localhost for no reason and couldn't get it back as before. So the testing was different since some uses cases weren't redo-able on their setup.
So my co-worker had that and nothing had done the trick to fix it, so they just left it like that.
Then another one had the problem. And another one, and another one, etc. And I don't.
So what was the problem ? An update that messes up everything in the setup.
A simple internal update. Glad I didn't updated yet. Now I'm the only one in my team (4 people right now) who still has that feature. -
This indicates what I often ask myself when posting a rant.. but could be used for example for feature requests, too. 😋
The song is quite horribly though.. was kind of a running gag during my studies. A friend reminded me of it a couple of days ago and my mind directly associated it with @dfox 😛3 -
>start new job, not very professionally experienced dev
>spend couple of months working on a feature that is supposed to be an MVP kind of thing, be rushed to finish and told to cut corners because it's "just an MVP", still lose sleep and have relationship suffer (and ultimately ruined) as I try to not lose deadlines created by the boss with questions like "you can have this done by <very soon>, right?"
>frontend created by fellow developer is a garbled mess of repeated code and questionably implemented subpages, frontend dev apparently copies CSS from Figma and pastes it into new non-reusable React components as envisioned by designer, I am tasked with making sense of the mess and adding in API consumption, when questioning boss what to do with the mess I am often told to discard stuff that the frontend dev has made and just reuse his styling; all of this on top of implementing the backend feature that a previous developer wasn't able to do
>specs change along the way, I had been using a library as a helper in some part of the original feature, now the boss sees that and (without further testing the library) promises CEO that we'll add that as a separate subfeature, but the performance of the library is garbage for larger inputs and causes problems, is basically shit that might not have been shit if we had implemented it ourselves, however at this point CEO has promised new feature to some customers, all the actual sense of responsibility falls upon my hands
>marketing folk see halfway done application and ask for more changes
>everything is rushed to launch, plenty of things aren't implemented or are done halfway
>while I'm waiting for boss to deploy, I'm called up to company office by CEO, and get new task that is pretty cool and will actually involve assessing various algorithms and experiment with them, rather than just stitching API calls and endpoints together, it involves delving into a whole new field of CS that I never had the opportunity to delve into before
>start working on cool task, doing research, making good progress
>boss finally deploys feature I had been originally implementing
>cut corners of original boring insane feature start showing up, now I have to start fixing them instead of working on cool task, however the cool task also has a deadline which is likely expected to be met
I'm not sure if I'm having it bad or not, is this what a whole career in software development will look like?6 -
What CI software are you using?
Are you happy with it or what do you hate about it.
I tried 5 different CI platforms in the past week, and I did not like any of them..
Any recommendations? (Can also be self hosted, I have a k8s cluster at my disposal)
// a short rant about team city
wE uSe koTliN dSL to reduce how much configuration is needed, fuck you I ended up with even more, it's horrible I have 40+ micro services, meta runners sounded like a awesome feature until I found out you need to define one for ever single fucking project...
Oh and on top of that, you cannot use one from root parent, but also it cannot be named the same.
Why is all ci software just so retarded - sorry I really cannot put it any other way11 -
So... i discovered a "feature" in our portals and i probably fucked up.
basically it was a bug/feature where i was able to see a guy's offer+ctc , from our team
idk how, but it's a combined employee attendence/referrals/interview/payroll portal and i was just exploring while marking my attendance. funnily, it was just for a giy that i interviewed and the one who got selected and joined
recently we were having breakfast in office and i accidentally blurted out this feature. i thought that they might have known too, but turns out they don'T.
later I checked and this guy's letter was now not showing , indicating that it was some kind of bug that got fixed. now am not sure what to do, since this looks like some kind of fireable offence. should i let someone know this? the hierarchy above me is : SSE, TL , past TL( now tl of other team but he was the one who took the 2nd round ) and VP4 -
WHEN:
...when the analyst decides whether a feature is too complex to implement or not.
So you don't get the requirements because he thinks it's too complex.
So you develop something that has nothing to do with requirements. Actually much more complex.
And after that, one week before deployment, the customer actually show you and the analyst that what you did is fucking useless.
It was much easier, or at least completely different.5 -
Hi there!
What do you guys think about the feature "ContextApi" released with React 16.3?
From my point of view it is pretty neato to get rid of some dependencies coming up with redux, if the only thing you want is to distribute collected information among several components for rendering.
On the other hand, if one replaces the redux pattern with the context-api, the detailed information for debugging will be lost, including the time-travelling feature.
For compensation, there is a guy who had built a bridge between the context-api and the redux dev tools, which even will restore the ability to time-travel through the information flowing through the react context.
https://medium.freecodecamp.org/rep...
I will definitely try out a migration of our redux structure to context-api in an experimental branch of one of our products! -
What you like in products is what other humans like, because you're a human. Corporate money-making strategies are inherently anti-human. Thus, sooner or later, they will remove every feature you liked and replace it with bs2
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Unguided code style decisions and the whole personal style things sometimes display an intention behind a piece of code. They can hint on semantics and relations between the pieces of data or operations, like it's often the case with grouping that doesn't separate bunch of statements with a blank line. Sometimes, they can even carry an emotional message. Love, hate, grudges, deepest affection for some golden hammer feature of the language, everything is on the table actually. For instance, this is what fear looks like:
3==o -
so, a new day, a new ERP software to rant about:
this one features an email feature (heh) but with a catch.
only pop3, no imap, if you want ssl the software suggest that you use a 3rd party program, also every user has to be logged in by the admin cause they assume the sysadmin knows all passwords cause he has "password lists"
i called them to ask why their software is what it is, they answer "there was never a need to develop an IMAP functionality, SSL would be so much work and it never became a problem that the sysadmin didnt know all passwords"
in unrelated news, does anyone know a nice sub 100K ERP software with CRM, Material Management and Offer/Order Management that runs on a local server and offers german support for a company in the 50 to 500 worker bracket? -
Nothing says asshole like a guy who won't approve your MR even though the feature is working but they prefer implementing it using their preferred approach.
Different coding styles for different folks. What matters is that the approach used is efficient, working and tested. But oh no, you have to write the code exactly how they want it.
Good thing we're free to merge our own MR when the reviewer takes more than two days to merge it.4 -
Storytime.
The Prometheus tales
Part IV - A new FUBAR.
A new and very fascinating problem emerged a few days, after feeding some node definitions to the new titan instance.
It's a storage fuck-up. A major one.
If I'm informed correctly, the latest prometheus should have the same (or even better) log compression algorithms for metrics, as the old one - because these fuckers are so damn good at what they are doing: compress some fucking logs.
The new instance is agregating metrics as planned. Grafana work's like a fucking charm.
Nethertheless, because of very fascinating but unknown reasons, the new instance creates 50GB of metrics in under 4 fucking hours.
Am I missing something here? Some magic parameter that has to be passed to the titan, that enables the hardcore compress-them-fuckers-feature?
Debugging session is tomorrow.
To be continued. -
Never work on a feature which is too huge so it needs to be divided among multiple developers. Reason because there are high chances that one of the devs will do one or more of these:
- Follow his/her own coding style rather than what the system already follows.
- Write generic flows based on his/her part alone making it super difficult for rest to reuse.5 -
When you’re working under high pressure, a coworker writes you that you have a bug in the new feature which is blocking him and you start swearing about what an idiot you are...
And you then realize that this is the team chat with SM, PO etc., and not the private chat.. -
We are a remote team of two android developers for this startup. I have 3 years of experience and my protege has 1 year of experience.
One month a new guy with 10 years experience joined our team and hes working onsite. He's supposed to be scrum master and be good ad dividing and delegating tasks, but what he's doing past two weeks is appaling to me.
Basically we got a request for a new feature. He skipped discovery and planning steps, went straight to implementation and one week later showed us his implementation.
Note that at that moment my remote team was not informed about anything. He started reinventing a library to capture a picture and video, while there are tons of other well developed libraries out there.
What makes things more difficult is that his english sucks.
I don't understand what he's doing but now it seems that either he's playing office politics and is trying to stay ahead by not informing us so we would be forced to follow his implementation. Or maybe he is totally oblivious and don't have any sprint management experience, so he's just trying his best by working hard and trying to prove his own worth.
Eitherway it sucks that he is not able to communicate specifications from HQ to us, because even I did a better work with planning our sprints by communicating remotely.
So now I started asking him questions and turns out the guy doesn't even understand specification. He already half implemented the feature and can't tell us why we need it and why we are not using what we already have in the app. So now he's back to square one: doing discovery. It's fcking ridiculous.1 -
Only when the latest feature is implemented, the last bugfix and the last workaround are found, the last unit test is written, the latest CI/CD pipeline done, the customer guy does manual testing and acceptance tests on the staging server and let's them pass and a few days later it's pushed to production...
You will be reminded (again) that shitty customers do exist! A customer is the least capable person to tell you what the customer actually wants and is also the least trustworthy person to test the features he requested...
Holy fuck come on! Just test that shit on the staging Server! One Look could have already shown you that that's Not what you expected!
I checked the logs after that and yup you guessed correctly... The said endpoints weren't even used on staging, only on production...1 -
Gitlab issues and their mile long conversations are driving my crazy.
I just wanted to find out if a fcking feature exists. Oh, there is a ticket ... ah cool opened 4 years ago ... still unresolved?!
Thats fine, maybe they are planing shit. But no, their discussion lasts for freaking years. And than it just gets lost or fcking closed. I mean what the hack?!
Sometimes even paying customers are getting freaking ignored or like ... ugh might be a cool feature, but plz fck off ...
That happened to me so many freaking times. Its driving me crazy!4 -
Opinions
Hello, I’m considering building a web framework.
My ideal features would be:
Customizable authentication system(considering using a jwt lib)
Embedded DB(bolt db)
ORM( writing my own)
REST api to DB (via code generator)
Code generator(generation of models and views via cli)
GUI to db(some admin dashboard)
CORS(web service right?)
Why?
Ease of development
Fast prototyping of small-medium web services.
Fun.
My question is, do i have to many things on my platter? Should i narrow it down into less featured framework? What feature should I focus on? How should i benchmark it? Should i write tests for absolutely everything or just for exported methods? What should i take into consideration when developing ORM API, Auth API...
The language is Go
Thank you for your input10 -
Coworker just showed me how he avoids merge conflicts and I'm undecided on it. We use feature-branch workflow, so if a feature takes a long time to finish, it may mean merging master multiple times. He avoids it by stashing changes instead of committing them, then when he needs to merge master into the branch it's still clean. When the feature is done and he's ready to commit, he pops the changes and git diff shows all the changes before you push and you just change what you need instead of being forced to use the horrible merge software.
There must be problems with this, right? This seems too easy for it not to be the standard.5 -
What is your experience; Is GitHub worth (feature-wise) the 7$/month in the basic plan?
I am currently running my own GitLab on an Odroid because I need unlimited private repos for freelance work. This basically works great, but updating GitLab and fixing "server" issues emerged to be quite a lot of work. Also, I prefer the GitHub UI over the new GitLab one and GitLab is (may be due to my low-spec Odroid) terribly slow for me.
On the other hand, it gives me ultimate freedom on groups, repo-permissions, client-accounts for bug-tracking, ...
How much freedom does the GitHub "Developer"-option offer? Is someone using it for freelance projects and has some experience to share? Thanks in advance!4 -
Fucking product manager...
Customer is struggeling with a feature implemented before I even joined the company. And he is absolutly correct. The logic is bullshit.
Guess what pm Said? Fuck Off, I Don't Care.
Damn fucking you. Should I Care? Is it one of our best customers? Is the feature financed by him? Are you bastard usually crawling in his ass?
Thanks that I'm on vacation for 2 weeks. I'm currious how they going to manage that.... -
Ok fuck everything, I will not work today nothing is fucking working, the feature that I implemented easily in the last app, is harder to implement now because of the new version of the library. Even the old and same version of the library I used in the previous app is not compatible with the new version of the framework. What a freaking horrible development experience we are getting into. Developing should become easier not harder mother fucking library developers, should I write my own library now? fuck you, and fml too.
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So I’m trying to implement a new feature on a web platform.
Getting constantly a new error which is good cause that means that slowly I am progressing.
And then I refresh click the button to test and then the whole top bar of the app moves back and forth like its dancing macarena for like 5 seconds. I was legit confused what just happened that. Tried to repeat it and figure out how is there animations in my code, but there’s nothing. Either I’m burned out or I’m going crazy.
Still deciding.2 -
I have a changed a project that has many many many bugs because of outdated code that kept it from working. In the process, I changed the structure of some feature implementations in order to get the application to work again. Can this be considered refactoring, or is it just a special kind of bugfixing?
Also, can I call something a rewrite even though I'm not actually writing anything, just using a GUI environment to create the same functionality again?
I need this because I'm writing about what I'm doing for my university and I can't find it on google - I guess it's opinion based.1 -
In the middle of a deployment call and the dev wants to "add a feature" on the fly (what could go wrong right!?). Next thing I here on our phone call is the client saying "great idea let's add that feature now! I'll wait to test!" Wait... WHAT THE FUCK is the client doing on this deployment call?!1
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Is git a history of what happend or a list intentional changes?
Had this discussion with my boss. He said i shouldn't rebase my feature branch because it is too much hassle (I did some squashing and fixups). I should just commit on top and merge master into my branch.
What is your git philosophy?
Do you "own" a feature branch until you create the PR?6 -
My computer after installing Solus has some pretty weird behavior.
It is with the keyboard and the mouse. The keyboard often writes the highlighted part, which is super annoying, because I have this habit of using the highlighted feature as a scrollbar, so if I am using this feature to scroll in the terminal, when I am editing, the keyboard will paste the content of the highlighted text when I am typing randomly, which is why I have to highlight a space, and also why I have to put my cursor to where I am typing to prevent it from randomly teleporting. And the mouse often left click / right click randomly, and sometimes the cursor has a seizure.
This is not something that happens to me recently. It has been happened to me when I was using Manjaro (which was way long ago), and at that time only the seizure cursor is happened. Now more stuff happened, and they are happening more frequently than ever.
The Internet on my computer is also terrible today, I cannot access to any website on the browser (Until now). I first thought that it's my browser (Brave)'s fault and I tried on Firefox, also not working. I tried to reconnect to the Wi-Fi, reboot the computer, nothing worked. Then I think of switching between Wi-Fis, because it's a strat that worked with my phone, and surprisingly, it worked!
(I really don't know what to end this rant, so I will just put this text here as a way to end the rant.) -
I don't know how many of you uses IBM Watson api (personality insights). We use in our office. They send back a huge data known as big 5 needs etc. They find the personality of a person from his speech. like anger, happiness etc. I don't understand how they calculate them and also every client trust the data what ibm tells is correct. if it was you if you have done that feature too many questions might have come.
that's the difference between mnc and a startup2 -
Have a question about git rebase with android studio.
So I have a feature branch which I finished working on, I made a pull request to develop branch and now I see many conflicts because develop is few commits ahead.
In android studio I switched to my feature branch, then did a git rebase develop and resolved all conflicts. After conflicted files were fixed I did a git add conflicted_file and continued with git rebase --continue until the end.
Now everything is finished. I have a local feature branch that was rebased to current develop, and I resolved all conflicts.
Problem is when I do a git push to my remote feature branch, I get a merge conflict error conflict from android studio and now I have to solve all merge conflicts yet again for some reason.
What I am doing wrong?2 -
PM describes a feature in unfinished PRD, two clubhouse tickets, 4 zeppelin's, a Google sheet's I don't have access to, and slack messages.
Has the audacity to tell me I fucked up because the feature doesn't work the way he imagines it.
What the fuck is the point of a PRD if the spec changes MID DEPLOY!? -
So I recently released a new android application on the play store and for some flipping reason it cannot be opened on any device it installs on. The application was approved by google and published and everything. You can find it here: https://play.google.com/store/apps/...
Issue is, when you install this, the play store only shows the option to uninstall it and not open it. Weirder yet, it can’t be found in any application drawer either. I don’t get if this is a valid feature or what but idk what to change in my code to fix this. Sadly so, there’s no online article on this exact issue. I don’t get how to fix it, so any help is appreciated12 -
I know this has been ranted about before but I'm still in my first year, it's my turn now.
If I ask about a feature in week 1 of a project and am told it is not needed, the client doesn't want it, or it is outside the SOW, then dont come back to me weeks later asking about the fucking feature!
Holy fuck tits, I see what everyone was bitching about now. -
Newbie here ! What do experience pro grammars think of the recent wave of “OOP is garbage” comments on the internet ? Is OOP truly on the decline ? Or is it that OOP should be a feature of a language while coding rather than a “everything is an object” mentality.5
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I've been thinking, and i feel like being the bad guy... So, for now, I'm also an "idea guy" if you know what i mean...
Idea: This site could have a feature like "product recommandations" (just like long rants or something [tyical idea guy saying]), where users could recommend stuff like programs, peripherials, or anything dev related.
This could be done using tags, like certain tags would get sorted into the "product recommandations".
Sounds nice, doesn't it?
(PS.: We should also make a site which is like google, trust me, it would make millions...) -
Was on Educational Consultancy for counselling. Asked them about their website, they gave me their Cpanel password to add some feature. After all I am just a noob. God knows what is going to happen to their site.
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So, I had a friendly debate with my senior dev today working over this feature.
What do you say is the best approach?
1. Optimize at the time of building the feature.
2. Do the feature work, optimize all at once. (let's say on a time cycle).5 -
Jira on Android 🙄
I had an overview of the backlog, blocked, active issues, could see who works on what and so on ...
Accidentally pressed the back button, returned to the project. Now it's a single big list with only issue type, description and deadline. It's pretty much a guessing game, which feature is open. Their seems to be no way to change that, not even deleting any data.
How did this happen?? Let me change it back!6 -
Maybe not as much a question as a request for advice.
What I'm looking for is a free website hosting service that preferably lets you import your own source code. If it's got paid services for access to things like your own custom url and such, that's just fine. :) It's a for a hobby group project with people that aren't necessarily programmers in any way.
What we've checked so far is just Svenska Domäner, which have a site builder tool, but the custom source code feature is a paid service.
Since there's so much to choose from in this field I thought I'd check with some of the people I trust the most in these kinds of things. :) Any good suggestions?13 -
I'd like to hear opinions from experienced devs/software architects... Referencing my two previous rants, the imposter's has been strong today. And I really don't know how to feel about the possible solution I've come up with... Adding the new feature as a microservice for an otherwise monolithic application 🙄 is that a sane idea?
The thing is I need to have a subscription type event-driven mechanism and since we're listening to service bus messages from another cloud provider, I apparently can't just have a serverless function to do the job, so unless there's a better option, I need a microservice with the subscription that can then invoke a serverless function to actually do what needs to be done. That's my idea, but I'm far from sure this is the best way...1 -
Hi all,
I want to ask if the latest version of Xcode doesn't have a Single App Application feature? And what is a suitable replacement?1 -
Google is all about bringing new features, which are normally good ideas. But did why don't make what they already have?
You are normally operating with a beta tested base and some new alpha feature. -
Worst / best feature of any language:
Lack of / requirement of strict / dynamic / weak / strong typing. Just typing. Typing typing typing just typing.
Having to specify the type in C/++/#, Java/Kotlin is so annoying and delays the project so much by having to do declare weird classes with 3 or 4 fields just because you need it in this tiny line of code.
Not having good type support in JavaScript and Python is a pain in the eyes when you can't find what type each variable is, or when you pass a wrong argument to a function, and when you do, it shows the definition for the type in a .ty or.pyi file and not the definition itself which you have to find elsewhere. Spent half of my uni exams trying to decipher the type while it could've been a piece of cake if you just knew the type.
Love / hate relationship 😝1 -
is there any way that the nemo file explorer on linux mint cinnamon is able to highlight the specific file when for example i downloaded a file with a browser and then want to view the file in the file explorer, so the browser redirects to nemo? how is it that I don't find this feature for nemo? doesn't it exist or am i too dumb googling this problem correctly? this feature is very helpful on windows, so what about it on other file managers?10
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Hey just release UpStamps (https://www.upstamps.com/).
UpStamps is a Feature Flag Management Platform to separate code from different environments and projects, this helps teams and developers deploy faster with less risk.
I want to know what you think and feedback is appreciated.5 -
How do you deal when you are overpromising and underdelivering due to really shitty unpredictable codebase? Im having 2-3 bad sprints in a row now.
For context: Im working on this point of sale app for the past 4 months and for the last 3 sprints I am strugglig with surprises and edgecases. I swear to god each time I want to implement something more complex, I have to create another 4-5 tickets just to fix the constraints or old bugs that prevent my feature implementation just so I could squeeze my feature in. That offsets my original given deadlines and its so fucking draining to explain myself to my teamlead about why feature has to be reverted why it was delayed again and so on.
So last time basically it went like this: Got assigned a feature, estimated 2 weeks to do it. I did the feature in time, got reviewed and approved by devs, got approved by QA and feature got merged to develop.
Then, during regression testing 3 blockers came up so I had to revert the feature from develop. Because QA took a very long time to test the feature and discover the blockers, now its like 3 days left until the end of the sprint. My teamlead instantly started shitting bricks, asked me to fix the blockers asap.
Now to deal with 3 blockers I had to reimplement the whole feature and create like 3 extra tickets to fix existing bugs. Feature refactor got moved to yet another sprint and 3 tickets turned into like 8 tickets. Most of them are done, I created them just to for papertrail purposes so that they would be aware of how complex this is.
It taking me already extra 2 weeks or so and I am almost done with it but Im going into really deep rabbithole here. I would ask for help but out of other 7 devs in the team only one is actually competent and helpful so I tried to avoid going to him and instead chose to do 16 hour days for 2 weeks in a row.
Guess what I cant sustain it anymore. I get it that its my fault maybe I should have asked for help sooner.
But its so fucking frustrating trying to do mental gymnastics over here while majority of my team is picking low hanging fruit tasks and sitting for 2 weeks on them but they manage to look good infront of everyone.
Meanwhile Im tryharding here and its no enough, I guess I still look incompetent infront of everyone because my 2 weeks task turned into 6 weeks and I was too stubborn to ask for help. Whats even worse now is that teamlead wants me to lead a new initiative what stresses me even more because I havent finished the current one yet. So basically Im tryharding so much and I will get even extra work on top. Fucking perfect.
My frustration comes from the point that I kinda overpromised and underdelivered. But the thing is, at this point its nearly impossible to predict how much a complex feature implementation might take. I can estimate that for example 2 weeks should be enough to implement a popup, but I cant forsee the weird edgecases that can be discovered only during development.
My frustration comes from devs just reviewing the code and not launching the app on their emulator to test it. Also what frustrates me is that we dont have enough QA resources so sometimes feature stands for extra 1-2 weeks just to be tested. So we run into a situation where long delays for testing causes late bug discovery that causes late refactors which causes late deliveries and for some reason I am the one who takes all the pressure and I have to puloff 16 hour workdays to get something done on time.
I am so fucking tired from last 2 sprints. Basically each day fucking explaining that I am still refactoring/fixing the blocker. I am so tired of feeling behind.
Now I know what you will say: always underpromise and overdeliver. But how? Explain to me how? Ok example. A feature thats add a new popup? Shouldnt take usually more than 2 weeks to do my part. What I cant promise is that devs will do a proper review, that QA wont take 2 extra weeks just to test the feature and I wont need another extra 2 weeks just to fix the blockers.
I see other scrum team devs picking low hanging fruit tasks and sitting for 2 weeks on them. Meanwhile Im doing mental gymnastics here and trying to implement something complex (which initially seemed like an easy task). For the last 2 weeks Im working until 4am.
Im fucking done. I need a break and I will start asking other devs for help. I dont care about saving my face anymore. I will start just spamming people if anything takes longer than a day to implement. Fuck it.
I am setting boundaries. 8 hours a day and In out. New blockers and 2 days left till end of the sprint? Sorry teamlead we will move fixes to another sprint.
It doesnt help that my teamlead is pressuring me and asking the same shit over and over. I dont want them to think that I am incompetent. I dont know how to deal with this shit. Im tired of explaining myself again and again. Should I just fucking pick low hanging fruit tasks but deliver them in a steady pace? Fucking hell.4 -
Android 13 will Unlock Certain Device Controls even when Locked
Android 13 is the newest operating system that will be available soon. The OS comes with a range of new features, one of which is unlocking certain device controls even when the device is locked. This is a game-changer that will significantly enhance the user experience.
Introduction
The Android operating system has undergone numerous changes since its inception. With every new release, users are treated to new features that enhance the overall user experience. Android 13 is no different, and it promises to revolutionize the way we interact with our devices. One of the most exciting features of Android 13 is unlocking certain device controls even when the device is locked. In this article, we'll take a closer look at this feature and explore its implications for users.
What is Android 13?
Before we delve into the details of Android 13, let's take a moment to understand what it is. Android is an operating system designed primarily for mobile devices such as smartphones and tablets. It was developed by Google and is currently the most widely used mobile operating system in the world. Android 13 is the latest version of this operating system, and it comes with a range of new features that will make it even more user-friendly.
Device Control Access
One of the most exciting features of Android 13 is the ability to access certain device controls even when the device is locked. This means that users will be able to control various functions of their device without having to unlock it. Some of the controls that will be accessible include the flashlight, camera, and voice assistant.
How will it work?
The process of accessing device controls when the device is locked will be straightforward. Users will only need to swipe left on the lock screen to access a new panel that will display the controls. The controls will be easy to use, and users will be able to activate or deactivate them with a single tap. This feature will make it easier for users to perform certain tasks without having to unlock their device.
Implications for Users
The ability to access certain device controls when the device is locked will have several implications for users. Firstly, it will make it easier for users to perform certain tasks quickly. For example, if you need to use the flashlight, you won't have to go through the process of unlocking your device and navigating to the flashlight app. Instead, you can simply access the flashlight control from the lock screen.
Secondly, this feature will enhance the security of the device. By limiting access to certain controls, users can ensure that their device remains secure even when it is locked. For example, the camera control will only be accessible when the device is unlocked, which will prevent unauthorized users from taking pictures or videos.
Other Features of Android 13
Apart from the device control access feature, Android 13 comes with several other exciting features. These include:
Improved Privacy Controls
Android 13 comes with improved privacy controls that give users more control over their data. Users will be able to decide which apps have access to their location, contacts, and other sensitive data.
Enhanced Multitasking
Multitasking has always been a key feature of Android, and Android 13 takes it to the next level. Users will be able to view multiple apps at the same time, making it easier to switch between them.
New Messaging Features
Android 13 comes with new messaging features that will make it easier for users to communicate with their friends and family. These include the ability to react to messages with emojis and the ability to schedule messages.2 -
Can someone tell me how to properly rebase changes from main branch
I always fuck myself over. Fucking merge conflicts i caused by myself. Since the CD pipeline creates a commit or i merge into main from a side branch, i often forget to pull those changes locally from main branch
What happens then is i just create a new branch to start working on the next feature
git checkout -b feature/shit
Totally forgetting to first do
git pull --rebase
From main branch. Because of this when i push shitload of features to feature/shit branch and then try to merge that shit into main. CD pipeline gets fucked. There are merge conflicts now because i havent rebased
Question -- if i switch to a new branch, make a shitload of changes and forget to rebase from main branch First, what command do i type to rebase right there (on the new branch) but rebase from main branch so these conflicts dont appear?23 -
I just thought of a potential webapp ideas while talking a shower. Still need to give it some thought but wondering how best to built it out? Sorta like a message board/kiva/change.org
I'm thinking #1 is backend + REST api. Then just create a webapp using React Native so it can be used mobile and browser?
Probably will build the first prototype though using either C# just to test the APIs...
But I guess how do you break a project up. Do you build backend first or do it feature by feature (both backend and frontend)?
And well what about hosting? Do need to decide now like AWS/Heroku... Or can I just build on local? Need a db though...1