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Search - "one fucking job"
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Dear people who complain about spending a whole night to find a tiny syntax error; Every time I read one of your rants, I feel like a part of me dies.
As a developer, your job is to create elegant optimized rivers of data, to puzzle with interesting algorithmic problems, to craft beautiful mappings from user input to computer storage and back.
You should strive to write code like a Michelangelo, not like a house painter.
You're arguing about indentation or getting annoyed by a project with braces on the same line as the method name. You're struggling with semicolons, misplaced braces or wrongly spelled keywords.
You're bitching about the medium of your paint, about the hardness of the marble -- when you should be lamenting the absence of your muse or the struggle to capture the essence of elegance in your work.
In other words:
Fix your fucking mindset, and fix your fucking tools. Don't fucking rant about your tabs and spaces. Stop fucking screaming how your bloated swiss-army-knife text editor is soooo much better than a purpose-built IDE, if it fails to draw something red and obnoxious around your fuck ups.
Thanks.62 -
C: application not working
Me: k. What changed?
C: we didn't make changes
Me: k... *gets a tech team (W) on the phone*
W: Hey, what's broken?
Me: C's application. How do things look?
W: running healthy. I'll check logs.
Me: thanks. *gets tech team (S) on the line*
S: hey, everything clear on our end, will check logs.
Me: thanks *gets tech team (U)*
U: hey! They asked us to deploy their new version today during normal deployment time. Is it acting up?
Me: C, what did you change?
C: nothing major, just how we connect to W and S...
W&S: are you shitting me???
Me: U, will you please roll it back?
C: no! Must stay on this version, you need to fix your side!!
Me: nope. *calls U boss (UG)*
UG: U, you have my permission to roll back, they need to fix. C, if your boss doesn't like it, have them call me.
*rollback fixes problem*
IF I FUCKING ASK YOU WHAT THE FUCK YOU CHANGED, YOU BETTER TELL ME THE TRUTH, OR I WILL STRIP YOUR CODE OFF OUR FUCKING SYSTEMS AND SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT. MY JOB IS TO HELP YOU AND YOU NEED TO BACK TO FUCK UP AND NOT GET IN THE WAY OF MY JOB OR YOU WON'T HAVE ONE ANYMORE.11 -
I FINALLY DID IT!! I landed a job!! I'm going to be a firmware engineer!! Woohoo!! 😁
It only took half a year, but I finally got one, and purely off my own merit. It feels damn good when you get the job with no references or connections, just your own skills.
After a highly successful on-site technical/whiteboard interview, I was 90% confident I'd get it. The fact that my job search is finally over, is such a fucking relief. Good riddance to endless interview prep, applications & rejections.
I start on Monday. Goodbye freedom >.<19 -
I’ve been told my rants are being missed, since I left my hellhole of a job. So here’s a filler until something major goes wrong.
Right so here’s what my life is like at the minute. I’m working remotely from home. So this morning, instead of spending 2 hours in traffic, I got up at a reasonable hour and brought the dog for a walk. I don’t know who these people think they are, fucking up my routine like this. The audacity of them thinking it’s no big deal really pisses me off.
I’m the only iOS developer in the company. Normally I get bombarded with “why not use react-native” or “RxSwift is the future” and other shitty tools. Last week I said “i’d like to do X this way”. Do you know what those absolute bastards said to me? You ready? Hope you are sitting down ... they said ... “ok, sounds good” .... the fucking c***s.
Oh oh and the big one, wait for this now. Fridays are demo days, last Friday I showed what I was working on. Afterwards the CEO comes along, stares me in the eyes and without a care in the world what his comments might do to my self-esteem the fucker says “wow great job”. He fucking makes me SICK!!!
Feels good to get all that off my chest. I’ve missed venting. At this rate, I’ll be back very soon!8 -
I'm a little late to this, but that Python master/slave issue.. what the fuck is up with that?!
You say that you're offended by words.
=> Fuck off. If you want to serve social justice, help people in third-world countries that need your help.
=> Also, you do realize that the use of master/slave is just as much applicable to technology as client/server or host/guest are, right? It's a relationship between fucking machines or code blocks, not humans.
You say "why the outrage over this?"
=> Fuck off. Your SJW bullshit has no place in technology. It's a fucking word in fucking code!!!
You say that you're improving the Python project with this.
=> Fuck off. It breaks existing documentation and needlessly abstracts terminology that is used pretty much everywhere. What do you prefer, conciseness and a language to be easy to understand or for it to become all cushioned to soothe your frail feelings?
You know, there's something else that I wanted to talk about that's related to this. I have Asperger Syndrome, which on paper is a disability. In practice it's difficulty to socialize while having an above average IQ. That "disability" is what drove me into technology. When I see job listings actively prefer people with disabilities for social justice, you know what? That offends ME. Because I wouldn't want to be chosen as the best applicant just because it ticks social justice boxes. I want to be chosen as the best applicant because I outcompeted every other applicant with actual skill and fitness to do my job.
Also, when a company sells you a defective unit, would you be happy? Of course not. So why are you happy when they employ a defective? I am someone that would - on paper - be impeded by natural selection, because I am "handicapped". But I'm all for it. Humanity is what it is today - shit - partly because defectives have become widely accepted into society. Call me a bigot, but I'd rather be called that than to not raise concerns about this trend.
On the subject of handicaps, that's a term that's used in games, what for aiding the player that can't win against the regular opponent (which is usually just a fucking bot, wtf yo). I am handicapped, therefore YOU shouldn't use the word in a sense where it's totally reasonable to use it!! Says no one ever, me neither. Grow a fucking pair and realize that code isn't written with the intent to offend anyone. So why are you?23 -
I actually hate this job, seems like there's not a single project with decent code abstraction. Everything is a fucking spaghetti like:
```
// we only care about e-mail fields, which are odd
isValid(index) {
if(!(index%2)) {
return true;
}
...
}
```
Like MOTHERFUCKER, WHAT BUSINESS RULE DOES THIS SHITCODE REFLECTS?!?! WHY CAN'T YOU SHITHEADS WRITE PROPER BUSINESS ABSTRACTION RATHER THAN JUST COLLEGE-GRADUATE QUALITY SHITCODE.
FUCKING KILL ME ALREADY I SHOULD HAVE INSTEAD BECAME A PSYCHIC CAUSE I'M SURELY GOOD AT GUESSING WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK THIS FUCKING FUCKCODE INTENDS TO ACHIEVE.
AND YOU CALL YOURSELF TOP-NOTCH DEV CAUSE THIS IS JAVASCRIPT... YOU KNOW WHAT, SHITHEADS LIKE YOU, WHO DON'T KNOW SHIT OTHER THAN GLOBALLING EVERY FUCKING NPM LOCAL PACKAGE IS WHY GOOD ENGINEER LIKE US GET SHIT FROM PHPEPSI ZENDFRAMESHIT FUCKHEADS DEVS.
DO YOU THINK YOUR COMMENT WAS HELPFUL??? DO I LOOK LIKE A BUSINESS GRADUATE FUCKTARD WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THE MODULE OPERATOR IS??? I WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU WROTE THAT SHITFUCK INSTEAD OF WHAT IT DOES; THE REASON I'M READING YOUR POORLY WRITTEN MODULE OPERATOR SOAP-OPERA IN THE FIRST PLACE IS CAUSE I KNOW WHAT IT'S DOING, IT'S BREAKING SHIT.
OH AND ONE MORE THING, FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK FUCKSHIT SHITFUCK FUCk11 -
Been lurking here for a while. Finally pissed off enough to post.
Been programming in Ada for nearly a decade now. One of the few younger devs who knows the language well. Have a large collection of libraries and tools written in it, open source. Done contract work. Looking to get out of my current line of work, which is medicine, because fuck this recent legal climate. I'm spending all my time dealing with legal compliance and it rapidly changing.
I see a job posting from a company looking for a programmer to mostly write testing stuff for clients. They mostly work with Ada. I've written a whole unit testing and integration testing framework. Perfect. Apply. "You don't have the required skills." Oh... K then.
Wanna guess what I was just offered as contract work. Same company. I guess i'm fucking qualified if you asswipes sought me out to ask me to fix your fucking bullshit.
What the hell is wrong with management and HR in recent years?9 -
After one job interview I ran across this one guy in an elevator.
"Are you an IT? I am looking for one".
I nodded, "Yes, I am". He was about to get off the elevator and told me to save his phone number.
By the time I was about to type the last 3 digits of his number on my mobile, I got a call from my brother and the elevator door closed. I immediately rejected the call.
Unfortunately, the dialer went empty and I lost his number.
I was trying to recall the number but I can only remember the last 3 digits.
I went back to the same floor, but there was around 30 offices and I couldn't find him. I gave up.
Fucking iPhone.6 -
My current one. When I was chosen for my current job as the final candidate, he went for me partly because we've got the same favourite music and that made us click very well.
Now, a year later, it's still going awesome.
We can be serious but most of the time (when we see eachother) it's (savage) jokes, 'rekking' eachother and we keep eachother up to date on new music releases and festivals.
I remember this convo about music:
Boss: Heyy, this is a track I go hard on: Rejecta - Followed 😉
Me: oh yeah that one is awesome! Have you heard his other tracks?
B: HE HAS OTHER TRACKS?! 😍
M: Yaaaaas! He's got 'deserve to die', ''let my tape rock" and 'move my body'
B: OH MY GOD THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME 😍
M: enjoy man 😘
B: thankies 😊
He's not that much older than me and actually listens to advice.
Just an awesome boss in general!5 -
I have just landed my dream job. Coming from a background of java and python, I applied for a C++ heavy company... The interview process was centred on algorithms and I passed it. Now I get to learn the language I have always wanted to learn from pretty hardcore devs while I am getting paid. One of the best fucking days of the 21 years I have been alive for.3
-
before programming class:
"yes easy af, imma finish this in a few minutes"
during programming class:
*types everything in 10 mins*
*compiles and runs perfectly*
"wtf this isnt supposed to happen"
*spends 30 minutes trying to find the bug*
"fucking hell, it should fucking work by now"
end of programming class:
"oh i put int instead of float, good job, my time was wasted because of one fucking word"9 -
College placements, one of the leading tech companies comes to hire people on day 1, I miss the first round coz I overslept, woke up and realized the test started an hour ago, finally went in after the test was done. They still let me take the coding test but with reduced time, and kept talking to themselves that if this guy gets through, I'm fucking done with placements. Managed to do well in the test and then proceeded to the interviews, aced the interviews and was offered a job. People at work still call me "that guy who turned up late and still got the job"6
-
OH MY GOD
WHO NAMES A CONFERENCE ROOM AFTER AN -ADDRESS-??
At my new job, we had all day training on Friday. It was emphasized many times that we should not be late. I look at the meeting invite many times, and it says [123 Fake], with Fake being a Very Well Known Street, and I see on Google Maps that there's an office building there. Great, we must have an off-site training facility to help our clients become certified in our product. It doesn't say which floor, but I assume the small space we have in that large office building will become evident once I check in with lobby security.
Friday morning comes, I get to the office building 20 minutes early, and try to check in. They've never heard of my company. Maybe there's a computer lab we rent out? No, they don't know anything about that. I don't have work email or slack set up on my phone yet, so who do I call? I try reception, no one answers. Eventually I call our customer support line.
I shouldn't be at 123 Fake St. I should be at the office. Because that's the name of the conference room!
YOU HAD ONE JOB, ROOM NAMER!
Last night my boyfriend and I tried to think of worse names for conference rooms. The only ones I could think of were "meeting canceled" (but with that, at least I would be in the correct fucking building!) or just naming every conference room "conference room". Here's the thing: there's not just one 123 Fake St room! There's two of them right next to each other! So you can easily show up and think, I remember I was supposed to be in this room, but which one?
And I'm not even the first person to make this mistake. CLIENTS have gone to the wrong building before because they get included on meeting invitations that include conference room names! WTF!
It's pretty common to have Chicago conference rooms named after neighborhoods, or iconic buildings, etc. But nobody is going to think, "meeting in Bucktown? I'll just wander around the neighborhood until I find people with laptops". It's obviously a conference room. BUT A FUCKING ADDRESS OF A NEARBY OFFICE BUILDING? It's not even an iconic of a building!
Names matter. I care a lot about names in code. I never realized it could apply to the physical world as well. So now I am on a mission to change the names of these Goddamm conference rooms so I'm the last person to be directed to the wrong fucking building.
OH, and I'm out $9 for a taxi ride and a pair of gloves that got lost in the taxi so that's GREAT.13 -
So there it fucking goes.
Hi. I'm WillibertXXIV.
I'm not a programmer by trade; I have a more than fulltime job as a cook. As for the last year, I spent pretty much all my free time, overlapping my sleep time, to learn how to code.
All that so I can create a game that I started working on the same day I started my learning process. So far it's shit and it's going to stay that way for a long time. Only I can say this. It's my baby. It's fucking ugly and shit but it's mine.
Yesterday I broke it. I broke my baby. I don't know how it fucking happe. When I went to sleep I had a steady 175fps, nice realtime lightning and player / enemy that flowed like running water. I worked really hard to make that happened. Profiling, writing better code, profiling, etc. It's still not good, it's less shit.
I woke up, beautiful day. Not too warm, not too cold, that sweet spot right in the middle. Girlfriend already made the coffee. Perfect. Woke up, sat down to start my morning time work before going to my realjob and
BAM
Everything is shit, 20fps max. That one thing, gfx.waitforpresent, showing up in the profiler eating everything as the game run. Movements are now of stroboscopic nature. Light is still ok but what good does it do now fucking piece of shit. I'm not qualified enough for this shit.
Fuck,
Fuck this,
Fuck this shit,
Fuck this shit i'm out of here.26 -
Had this with a relative. His laptop wasn't turning on, with or without charger so he brought it back to the store to fix it. It ran elementary os by the way (detail for later). Then he got it back after a week and we booted it and it had windows 8 installed (wtf indeed). So we called the service desk to ask about it since the issue was a broken charger (!!!). Their reply: oh yeah there was a weird system installed on it so we thought we'd reset it as well for you.
SERIOUSLY, THAT'S NOT YOUR FUCKING JOB!!
He is not tech savvy and he didn't know much about backups so that was literally about one year of work GONE. Yeah, I setup a cloud backup sync thingy for him right after that.7 -
New job, started two months ago. Forced to use a MacBook. First time using iShit in my life.
- Laptop reboots randomly every three weeks or so "because of an error" (thanks, very informative error message).
- Sometimes if I use two screens and I lock my laptop, only one screen gets locked.
- The most simple tasks require a fucking large number of clicks. There are almost no keyboard shortcuts. My hand hurts because of this, and after two months the pain is getting worse and worse.
- Yes, I know there are apps that give you extra keyboard shortcuts, but those don't help much. I never used a mouse in 10 years.
- Window management sucks. It's so broken and poor in so many ways, I don't know where to start.
- Random errors and pop-ups are the norm.
- I have only four fucking USB Type C ports. I can somehow understand having only Type C because it looks cool, but fuck at least give me 6 of them, or 8. Do you really have to force me to use a USB hub, in addition to a shitload of adapters?
- Multiple monitors don't work unless the laptop is connected to the power adapter.
- The above point means, in practice, that I have exactly zero USB Type C ports available to me: one is used for the power adapter, two are for the two monitors, and one for the USB hub. Whenever I have to connect something that has Type C, I have to choose between monitors and going fuck myself.
- I don't want to comment on performance, cooling system or battery life. This would be a waste of time. Let's just say that it's shit.
Now, dear Apple fangirls and fanboys, please downvote this rant. I want your downvotes, so please don't hesitate to press that (--) button. But please let me say that these products are shit, pure shit. Fuck Apple and their overpriced products.22 -
I was a good programmer.
My teachers always impressed by work..
I was like coming up on my own solutions not from books. Never remembered any algo but still the one who solve mostly every problems
Well then..
joined companies after college.
I thought I will learn so many new things..
Yes i learned but I'm feeling like I'm losing the spirit of problem solving
I'm just doing same thing, same logic, making similar kind of application with just little difference.
Nothing is like i'm making something new... All I'm doing is using predefined java and android method..
To create some predefined designs and working.
Fucking similar client requirements.
Seems like time to quit job and dedicate myself toward research
I know it's a boring rant... I'm just fucking
*frustrated*
For some
Hope hope = new Hope() ;15 -
I find it so amazing to see when my colleagues (or even me) are irritated/annoyed to the fucking point, swearing around and so on but then the phone rings and they are completely calm/sound nice/happy when they pick it up one second later. (we're Linux support engineers)
This job is the best fucking self control training I've ever had!10 -
So I finally got my head out of my ass and decided to install some OS on that 500MB RAM legacy craptop from earlier.
*installs Tiny Core Linux*
Hmm.. how do I install extra packages into this thing again? *Googles how to install packages*
Aha, extensions it's called.. and you install them through their little package manager GUI, and then you also have to dick around with some TCE directory, and boot options for that. Well I ain't gonna do that. Why the fuck would I need to dick around with that? Just install the fucking files in /bin, /var, /etc and whatever the fuck you need to like a decent distro. I'll fucking load them whenever I need them, BY EXECUTING THE FUCKING BINARY. But no, apparently that's not how TCL works.
Also, why the fuck is this keyboard still set to US? I'm using a Belgian keyboard for fuck's sake.. "loadkeys be-latin1"
> Command not found.
Okay... (fucking piece of shit) how do I change the fucking keyboard layout for this shit?!
*does the jazz hand routine required for that*
So apparently I need to install a package for that as well. Oh wait, an EXTENSION!! My bad. And then you can use "loadkmap < /usr/share/kmap/something/something" to load the keyboard layout. Except that it doesn't change the fucking keymap at all! ONE FUCKING JOB, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!
That's fucking it. No more dicking around in TCL. If I wanted to fuck around with the system this much, I'd have compiled my own custom Linux system. Maybe I can settle with Arch Linux, that's a familiar distro to me.. I can easily install openbox in that and call it a day. But this is an i686 machine.. Arch doesn't support that anymore, does it?
*does another jazz hand routine on Arch Linux 32 and sees that there's a community-maintained project just for that*
Oh God bless you fine Arch Linux users for making a community fork!! I fucking love you.. thank you so much!! Arch it'll be then <318 -
Hey devRant. What the fuck is up?
I'm new and just wanted to say hi or whatever. I don't even work in any computer science related job. I'm a fucking welder.
I have aspirations one day to be just like you nerds. I fall asleep at my desk almost every night taking random online programming classes which I lose interest halfway through to some OTHER class and redo the same shit.
Is this what it's like to be smart?36 -
Story time. My first story ever on devRant.
To my ex-company that I bear for a long time... I joined my ex-company 3 years ago. My ex-company assigned me and one girl teammate to start working on a brand new big web project (big one - two members - really?)
My teammate quitted later, I have to work alone after then. I asked if someone can join this project, but manager said other people are busy. Yea, they are fucking busy reading MANGA shit everyday... Oops, I saw it because whenever I about to leave my damn chair, they begin chanting some hotkey magic and begin doing "poker face" like "I'm doing some serious shit right here".. FUCK MY CO-WORKERS!
My manager didn't know shit about software development, and keep barking about Agile, Waterfall and AI shit... He didn't even fucking know what this project should look like, he keep searching the internet for similar functions and gave me screenshots, or sometimes they even hold a meeting of a bunch of random non-related guys who even not working on the project, to discuss about requirements, which last for endless hours... FUCK MY MANAGER!
I was the one in charge for everything. I design the architecture, database, then I fucking implement my own designed architect myself, and I fucking test functions that I fucking implemented myself based on my fucking design. I was so tried, I don't know what the fuck I am working on. Requirement changes everyday. My beautiful architecture began to falling off. I was so tired and began use hack fixes here and there many places in the project. I knew it's bad, but I just don't have time to carefully reconsider it. My test case began becoming useless as requirements changed. My manager's boss push him to finish this project. He began to test, he start complaining about bug here and there, blaming me about why functions are broken, and why it not work as he expected (which he didn't even tell my how he expected). ... I'm not junior developer, but this one-man project is so overwhelmed for me... FUCK MY JOB!
At this time, I have already work this project for almost 2.5 years. I felt very upset. I also feel disappointed about myself, although I know that is not all my entire faults. The feeling that you was given a job, but you can not get it done, I feel like a fucking LOSER. I really wanted to quit and run away from this shithole. But on the other hand I also want to finish this project before I quit. My mind mixed. I'm a hard-worker. I keep pushing myself, but the workplace is so toxic, I can feel it eating up my motivation everyday. I start questioning myself: "Is the job I am doing important?", "If this is really important project, didn't they should assign more members?", I feel so lonely at work... MY MIND IS FUCKED UP!
Finally, after a couple months of stress. I made up my mind that no way this project is gonna end within my lifespan. I decide to quit. Although my contract pointed that I only need to tell one month in advance. I gave my manager 3 months to find new members for project. I did handle over what I know, documents, and my fucked up ultra complexity source code with many small sub-systems which I did all by myself.
Well, I am with a new employer right now. They are good company. At least, my new manager do know how to manage things. My co-workers are energy and hard-working. I am put to fight on the frontline as usual (because of my "Senior position"). But I can feel my team, they got my back. My loneliness is now gone. Job is still hard, but I know for sure that I'm doing things on purpose, I am doing something useful. And to me that is the greatest rewards and keep me motivative! From now, will be the beginning for first page of my new story...
Thanks for reading ...12 -
God dammit, my ISP fucked up.
I have a 400 Mbit/s Internet connection, which I pay a lot for it. I live in the central of a average city and we got 18 Appartements here with a banque and a wellness shop underneath.
There is a new shop under our block and 1 month ago a tecnician was here and made some recabling, so the shop would get enough performace.
Now since 1 week ago I have a bad output, laggs in games and just get about 250 Mbit/s, when not on high traffic times.
That fucking multipler in our house is over 10 years old and around 18 households are connected to it.
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU NOT CHANGING IT, WHEN YOU SEE IT'S NOT ENOUGH?
We all here in this building are paying a lot for it, and now that fucking thing is overused and broken and you're just grabbing our money you shitbags!!!
YOU HAD ONE JOB! ONE FUCKING JOB!!!23 -
These fuckface wantrapeneurs, posting jobs (paying to do so) and then offering bullshit like:
- We have no funding, so you'll work for free for some time.
- Paying in fucking crypto.
- Wanting a full stack rainbow puking and shitting unicorn for peanuts
- Fucking scammers, posing as legit companies and asking you to install Anydesk.
- Asking absurd interview tasks and times (a couple of days worth of work for a task).
- Whiteboard and live coding interviews with bullshit questions thinking they're Google, while having 20 devs.
- Negotiating salaries and when presented with contract get the salary reduced by double the amount.
- Having idiotic shit on their company websites like a fucking dog as a team member associated as happiness asshole. (One idiot even had a labrador during the video interview while cuddling him)
- Companies asking you to install tracking software with cam recording to keep you in check. (Yeah, you can go fuck yourselves)
- Having absurd compensation schemes, like pay calculation based on the "impact" your work has
Either I'm unlucky or job hunting has become something else since I last started searching.4 -
*rants to some people I met in a cafe about how irresponsible making a ground rail live is*
Girl: "well people do make mistakes, right"
Me: "but they shouldn't! It's civil engineering ffs!"
Girl: "that doesn't change the fact that it's impossible for people to not make mistakes"
*realizes that I'll have to explain redundancy*
Me: "okay, so I have 2 mail servers. If I make an inevitable mistake, during an update or so, it only affects one of the servers but not the other one. So service is uninterrupted."
Girl: "that's far too complicated and technical.. explain it more easily."
Me: "alright, what job do you have"
Girl: *tells her job*
Me: "alright, so imagine that you get sick or go on a holiday or something. When there's someone else in the company that's got the same skills, they can ensure that the job gets done regardless. That's redundancy."
Girl: "aah, still too complicated!!"
What the fuck?! I removed all of the technical stuff and it's still too complicated?! How willfully ignorant or plain stupid can you be?!! Well fuck her then, but not in the way of taking her home. Now guess why I don't really like the muggles in my town. Fucking idiots!!!
"But muh BuzzFeed, conspiracy theories, deferring updates because they hog my WiFi, and casual games on my iPhone"
FUCK!!! FUCK PEOPLE!!!27 -
I'm specialized in creating technical debt.
Basically, I rant my way in any dev specialty.
Since I never have a solid understanding of what I'm fucking with, ranting is more natural.
Ability to create technical debt is one of the most important skill, often underestimated:
- it will lead to heavy refactoring or even rewrite = more job for dev
- it will save a lot of short term effort, and luckily will produce the mid-term lock-in of the developers (more money for dev)
- it will increase billable hours to the customer. Higher the technical debt, more complex the explanation, and easier to confuse the customer.
- the best thing is that you'll never pay the debt. You'll eventually leave - willing or not - the job and you'll find some green field to exploit and create more debt.17 -
"doEs AnYOnE HAVE IssUeS wiTh gETTing gIrl beCoz CodIng"
lmao what a fucking dweeb. What a loser really. How about we don't make a fucking job something akin to a personality trait?
were I single, would I sell myself as a "cODER" to a girl? fuck no, do some of you nerds really introduce yourself in such way? is this bs ass job your end all be all? aye, this be the easiest way to poise yourself in the complete opposite direction of the female sexual organ.
Fucking quit that shit, ain't no one really gasping for air because you can lay down some fucking js in a website, who gives a fuck? like really? these posts are so fucking annoying.
Grow a pair, and some personality.
Background: some dweeb complaining to me about finding it hard to get girls because of his "passion" station women would lose interest because all he would talk about is dev shit46 -
My Interview question was simple, just :
Create an algorithm using **JAVA** accepting row input which output corresponding diagram :
1.
*
**
***
****
2.
*
**
***
****
3.
54321
4321
321
21
1
I said, well this going to be easy. Turns out they give me one sheet of FUCKING PAPER. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? THIS IS JAVA NOT A FUCKING PYTHON.
But in the end i complete the test except i don't write the :
public stupid static motherfucking main(String[] dick){}
in every single number. Got Zero in the test. Didn't get the job.
I win.13 -
I don't understand this. How is that Facebook is one of the biggest company in the world and have the worst fucking mobile apps ever created. I just use messenger to talk with my mom and it's utter rubbish.
When a call arrives, there's no way to silence that call apart from setting the phone to mute. All the other apps shut up when you either click power button or volume button. But this fucking messenger piece of Satan's anus won't respond to any fucking button when I have a call.
Not only that, once you have received the call, there's no way you can rotate the app without ending the call, turning on auto rotate and call again. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? how the fuck is it that you're so fucking big but you don't have this simple features in your fucking app?
And yeah, most of the time, when I receive a call in mobile, it doesn't appear on the desktop website. If it does and I receive the call from there, the mobile app still keeps shouting. AND GUESS WHAT, at that point, if I reject the call from the mobile, it will end the call that I accepted from the desktop. HAHA, WHAT A FUCKING SURPRISE.
Facebook, please stop being a piece of shite. Put your goddamn money to good use. If you can't make a good app, maybe outsource it to other companies. They will do a better job than you.21 -
The education system is a fucking joke. How do you get through all the required courses and get to the capstone course where your one goal is to build a simple prototype of a project(like a simple website) for a real world client and not know HTML or CSS when you spent a whole fuckboy semester on a class dedicated to HTML, css, JavaScript and the teacher gave you the PHP. Not only that but you can't even figure out how to use a simple google search to look up the documentation on any of these topics or even the easy to follow tutorials littering the internet on how to use Bootstrap which is what we're fucking using to make it faster to develop the core logic of our app but all you fucking want to do is take shortcuts and create a PowerPoint presentation in google slides and make an easy project look like shit and make me and yourselves look like shit. But don't fucking worry, I'll code the whole thing in a fucking night because you didn't do your part of taking care of just the front end and planned for your incompetence and lack of questions or help. I know you're busy looking for a job for after you graduate but you can't even answer a simple programming question. Let me give you the solution on how to reverse a string, cuz you don't remember c# but it literally takes 30 seconds to google the solution that is everywhere. My project team is why no one takes a degree from this university seriously.9
-
One time was in a meeting with clients from abroad (big company with some offices in the US). After the meeting we went to a restaurant with the clients. Then one hour later our CEO shows up and starts tanking beers like crazy and gets super wasted. Then starts asking the client if they have a job for him in the US. He doesnt want to run his company anymore because all his employees are fuckung idiots blahblah. Then he asks me you understand right you have seen my employees they are fucking stupid. Uhm yeah dude I work for you... *awkward sillence, continues chugging beers, changes topic*4
-
Some time ago I quit my job at a big corporation. Getting treated like a resource, a production line robot, just isn't for me.
My current job is way better. Small company, lots of freedom, getting to work on multiple projects, the result counts. But, as a small company, we also collaborate with big corporations. So I joined a team at one.
Watching my coworkers there, I'm reminded of robots again. Lunch break? 15 minutes tops. Just shovel some edibles into your face hole and back to work. Five minutes break between meetings? Open laptop, work work work. The concept of "needing rest" seems entirely foreign to them.
Yesterday our product owner "relayed some criticism" from other team members to me. Apparently, me going to the toilet in breaks is "suddenly disappearing". Or me not replying within 15 minutes in the chat is outrageous. And then he tried to berate me how I'm "his developer" and his team's tasks have top priority. So, according to the PO the problem is me and I should "get used to their mode of operation".
How about "no". I quit a fucking job because that "mode" is simply inhuman. After that feedback, you bet I'm taking my legally protected 30 minutes lunch break and any other break I can. Because fuck yourself, you're not going to burn me out. The best part, that team has smokers who "suddenly disappear" twice as much as I do, but apparently that's somehow a-ok.
I had to remind him that his project is just one of several I'm working on, so no, not "his dev". While that wasn't exactly a powerful comeback, it did shut him up. Still going to talk to my boss on Monday, at least to ensure that the PO can't talk shit about me behind my back.4 -
First of all, I hate crammers so much. These people kill the industry without even understanding it. They turned interviews into exams, missed the point of hiring, and saw no distinction between knowledge and information all the time. They don't understand that if you can google an answer in five seconds, it's not knowledge. It's information.
They don't understand that questions like 'what will Python do if you delete an item from a dict while iterating over it' are complete nonsense. They don't understand that it's not 'dig deep'; it's just a bad practice that leads to errors, thus must be avoided. The fact of remembering 'RuntimeError: dictionary changed size during iteration' means that you haven't been avoiding it enough.
One more example. Which signature is correct?
- ApplicationListener<ContextRefreshedEvent>
- ApplicationListener<ContextRefreshEvent>
- ApplicationListener<RefreshedEvent>
- ApplicationListener<RefreshEvent>
Second. What's the point of forcing you to write compilable code in google docs? Do they really expect that one could possibly remember 'import org.springframework.beans.factory.annotation.Autowired;'? Seriously?
Third. Why do they expect me to know Spark, Java, J2EE, Spring Boot, Python, Kafka, Postgres, React/Redux, TypeScript, and work for miserable 70K EUR?
What's wrong with the European IT job market? Are they fucking nuts?9 -
About 2 months ago. My job fired half the dev staff including the only other web developer. I am a junior, and now the sole web developer. I have been yelled at for not working fast enough and not knowing the code base well enough. (I did a lot of Rails, and this is a Spring shop). I have daily panic attacks about coming to work and having to be here for 8 hours. I have never felt more abused. I'm constantly stressed, and drinking more than I should. All advice given to me has been "just stay there til you find something else or they fire you." but it feels like no one really knows how unhealthy this is for me. My one hope is that I didn't bomb this interview at a university. I fucking hate my job.16
-
How the fuck am I expected to salvage a fucking project that has been handed down to me with.
- No fucking clear architecture
- No fucking documentation
- Fucking shitty ass code base with no fucking coding standards
- The previous team was fucking learning a whole fucking new technology stack *Not fucking kidding* making fucking mistakes left and right
- No code reviews
- Mixing fucking local and cloud enviroment together
- No fucking testing
- Feature that were supposed to be implemented and are not working
- No configuration all the stuff are hard coded
- Full responsiblity for the whole stack
- Only one other guy with me
- And this fucking project has been delayed for a year
- MUCH FUCKING MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM
Like what the fuck am I expected to do? I took the job thinking that people knew what the fuck they were doing and surprise surprise that was a fucking bust.
the problem is also I am the junior and these fucking people have more experience than me, what the fuck happened to over seeing people's work, PM doesnt give a shit, developers dont give a shit nobody gives a shit.
But when I got this surprise surprise now everyone is interested in finishing the project
BULLSHIT11 -
Glass door: now almost completely fucking useless.
Glassdoor now requires you to login to even read the site. You log in and then AFTEr logging it, it informs you that you have to contribute an "anonymous review" to read the others.
Completely fucking useless and defeat the one reason it originally existed for: to help people review a company *before* applying.
Good job you morons at glassdoor, you had one job.
Of the following names, at least one of them is likely certifiably retarded (or has options against the company stock):
Christian Sutherland Wong (ceo)
Anthony Moisant (cio, senior vp)
Kate Ahlering (chief sales)
Owen Humphries (senior vp)
Annie Pearl (chief product officer)6 -
...ive been on call for 27 minutes. Have had 2 calls already. One "resolved itself as [their] coworker restarted the server on [their] end" and the other didn't realize the page they were trying to load was decommed 2 years ago. They submitted the request.
I'm sick, annoyed already, and don't want to deal with this, but will because it's my job. Kind of. I have to respond to the call, even if it's fucking dumb.14 -
In Italy (Milan)🇮🇹, job hunting is a fucking hell for misfits like me:
• Young(26)
• 1 year(working) experience + continuous learning/improvement at home
• Skillful and adaptable full-stack
• Willing to do greater things with software without being payed like a monkey
This is the last week working at my current company (from which I rejected the renewal of the contract for 26K€/13 months) and almost every time at a new interview everyone tries to down sell me by default or because of the fucking little time that I've been inside companies without even looking at my skills/capabilities.
Also many little companies made by the CEO and a technical manager that are looking for someone from which being provided food 😒(metaphorically).
(On another side, in one month, me and my gf need to move to a new apartment, the renting process sucks, and she has issues to find a non-slavering job because she is a foreigner(with good knowledge of English and Chinese) with very basic understanding of Italian and I see her crying often in my arms because it's hard and stressful for her to become economically independent as she would like to be)45 -
Teaching new recruit some SQL (even though hes supposed to fucking know SQL and have multiple years experience but I was a contractor and idgaf, not messing up my money. Just fucking annoying to have an idiot around you all the time).
Me: Okay, so sys tables, so this one is for jobs yeah?
Him: Yeah
Me: Okay, so in this table, its obviously not one row per job per step cos you have multiple rows for the same job and step. Also, there is a datetime field, so what is it showing?
Him: Hmmmmm..... (after some time, back and forth we get to the answer).... history table
Me: Cooooooool, okay, so, lets say, I have a job with 5 steps. If i run it once, how many rows will be in this table?
Him: 5 rows.
Me: Correct, so if I were to have run this same job, 10 times, how many rows get inserted into the table?
Him: (Now...you have to understand, how long this thought process was, im trying to fill the gap with words but really, he was like, having a flashback or something...I kept quiet but silently wanting him to say anything....then he looks me dead in the eyes).... 10!
Me: Motherfucker what!?!? 10 What? If 1 time == 5, what does 10 times ==?
Him: Hmmmmmmmmm.... (yes...we are doing this whole flashback montage all over again)....... Ohhhhh, 1!
Me: .....Stop, think, its a history table. It holds history, for when every step is run for a job, why would it be only one row?
Him: OMG, I know what a history table is!!!!
Me: (Pissed off cos I don't take disrespect calmly). Fine, genius, answer, go!
Him: (LONGER WAIT THAN LAST TIME!!!!)....is it not 10?
Me: I swear, I'm gonna kill you one of these days.
Him: *chuckle*
Me: No...seriously....
TOOK 20-30 MINUTES FOR HIM TO SAY 50!!!!!!
And even then, I swear he didn't understand why. Serious, he was a special breed, had a manager that was a super tard and when I worked here, the spirit of that manager possessed this idiot, the CIO and his little right hand bitch zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
If there was ever a time I was willing to catch a case at work, it was there.
Bonus: Serious, it got to the point I had to come in and tell this idiot that he can only ask me questions today if he calls me by my name...and my name has changed today...and no, you can't ask me for it cos you need my name to ask me questions.....FUCK OFF kkthxbai.5 -
Best advice for dev job hunting is work on your soft skills. Don't be a fucking hero, prove your teamwork ability.
Remember all the rules of all religions and social communities can be summed up in one line: "Don't be a dick!"1 -
I'm fucking tired of this so called lead developer, lead developer my ass:
- He takes two days to complete a simple task and he dares to ask me why I extended the deadline of this freaking complex feature I need to build.
- He does a half-assed job when completes a task, no validation of data, no well informative message when exceptions are th thrown ...
- He assigns me his tasks although I already have tons and we need to release soon.
- I take care of developing and maintaining 60% of the APIs and I implemented the most complex of features and he dares to always say that my code can be optimized in a vague way, never mentioning what exactly is he talking about, and never telling me beforehand, he always does it during team meetings where another thing is being discussed.
- He presents the app to the whole company and at the end doesn't give credit where it's due, no " thank you for being part of this or helping build this" even if I built most of that shit, instead he says he's disappointed in me ... WTF! What did you fucking do to build this to be disappointed in me? I'm the fucking disappointed one here !!
- He fucking keeps preaching practices that he doesn't follow or he finds workarounds to skip them while the rest of the team follows them.
- He's like "I'm only taking care of this task to help you out?!" .... wtf! I have nothing to do with that fucking task, how are you helping me! You just keep fucking lazing around when we need to be finishing features asap.
Thank God I don't expect anything from you, I get enough credit from my boss who expresses how impressed he's with my job.6 -
It's my first week working at shithole.co (can i say that?). My boss is a micromanaging asshole who knows the bare minimum re: programming. He thinks css is hard (no offense). I'm fresh outta college. He expects me to be able to do a very complicated api development through an equally complicated authorization process. Every fucking day "Is it working yet?" [This is my first week on the job]. I don't think he's read the documentation and I don't think he understands how to. As I am typing this out I realize I'm more educated than this dumb ass. Oh, some more context. Our senior dev is working on a more important project So we don't have time to bother him? So I am doing his job for 1/10 the cost. Oh, and i'm not allowed to contact him because he is too important. When the app inevitably crashes and no one knows how to fix it. I will give them my nutsack to swallow (can i say that?).14
-
Fucking finally. I got a job... No one is probably gonna give a shit because it's your average governmental drone position but I wanted this for a very long time...
** drum roll **
Customs and immigration officer!!!
Thats right! Deported! Deported! Deported! *hot chick* welcome to our country!
Best thing is... Now every project can be a side project... I can chillax and build software in my spare time... I love it.9 -
I bought flowers for my date. Online.
When I registered, the website send me via email my 30 character long password.
😥
So I try "forgot password". The genius website sent me, guess what, my 30 character long password...
For fuck sakes!!!! You had one job.... Hash the fucking password!!!!
I'm afraid these people will probably get hacked soon (murphy law).
Sha256.. Guys please...12 -
!dev
!!politics (kinda)
Here’s a gem from our recent harassment and diversity training at work:
Speaker: “All of these things are protected from discrimination in California! Wow! It’s a huge list, isn’t it? Now let me ask you a question: is a single white male under 40 protected?”
Everyone: *crickets*
Fucking really?
After immediately jumping on all of the other speaker’s questions, you can’t answer this one?
And later, here’s another gem:
Speaker: “If you witness an employee harassing another employee outside of work and work hours, completely unrelated to work, should you report it? What if you ask the person being harassed and she says no?”
Speaker: “Always report it! While it’s not *technically* required by law, you must report it! Why? Because you have the same protections she would! And maybe it’s easier for you to say something than for her.” (Surprise gendering was her own addition)
Fair on that last point, but against the person’s wishes? Totally not cool. Maybe it wasn’t harassment, or you don’t know the situation. Heads up: you probably don’t. Or maybe it wasn’t a big deal at all, but you think it’s earth-shattering. But all that reporting it against someone’s wishes does is create drama and possibly legal trouble. And if it wasn’t harassment or the case goes poorly, you just created enemies for yourself, or for one or both of them if you’re reporting it anonymously, and possibly even ruined one or both of their jobs/careers by doing so. Good fucking job, asshole.
Snitches get stitches.16 -
Before starting a job at company CUNT, we had an interview at which I told them I do not want to work on legacy monolithic codebases. We had a nice agreement and they offered me to work as a back-end with one of their projects. I was super excited to start. CUNT was very culty, always talks about how carrying for employees they are and always keep promises on their end of the table.
A week has passed, the codebase is superb legacy shit hole, no fucking standards, monolithic as fuck (BE and FE projects live in one project folder with tons of depreciated tools - there are no docs for them. That’s how old they are). They even have secret folder in their project with YOU GUESSED IT - secret keys.
Told CTO today, that I want to switch projects, because this was not the thing I signed up for and remember THEY ALWAYS CARE ABOUT THEIR EMPLOYEES AND PROMISES MADE. He basically told me, that project owners (other company) will not understand this culturally and I can either wait it out and possibly get my hands on a better project or fuck off right now.
Also, I was told, that my judgment was garbage worth and I should work longer with project “shit hole” to fully understand it.
Such a fucking salesman.
Anyways, I told that this situation is not culturally appropriate for me either as they gave me a sort of promise and I wont leave the company as I just switched jobs and cannot afford to do that again. I’ll hopefully get another position in another project soon.
WTF IS WORNG WITH PEOPLE8 -
I already wrote one rant about how my family deals with me being a developer, but this rant I wanna dedicate to people close to my family and what they actually think...
Earlier this year I ended school, so I was supposed to find a job. Well...I live in region where only small IT "companies" exist. It is really hard to find job as a developer around here. These small companies either do not want to hire anyone or they just hire people with super amazing university or just family members and friends. Anyway, I did not want to move to the capital city, so I just kept seraching...and that is how this family friends started to be fucking toxic.
While searching for job everyone just kept telling me how am I lazy as fuck and will not just go digging fucking drains or work for minimum wage to some korean shit company around here. Of course not literally, but I can see when someone starts to look at me as I am completely crazy. Our family lost many fake friends who just do not understand because of this. But it did not ended here...
When I finally found a job 1.5 month earlier, I was so happy. Job from home in relative good company. Ho Lee Fuk! Nobody believes me I am actually working. People look at me as I am a lazy fuck laying all day in bed and watching fucking TV. I am done with these dick people.
End of story.2 -
At a meeting:
"We don't know why <past developer, they all know who this motherfucker is> did it this way but we have to..."
Me: *slams table* no, stop. I am tired of this. Y'all must've really liked this guy. But he did it this way because he was a fucking idiot.
A
Fucking
Idiot
There is no other reason for this amount of fuckery that I have to be bothered to fix and mess with on A DAILY BASIS so I am gonna go ahead and call it as it is. The dude was a damn moron and no one here stopped him. I know he was a janitor here that got his cute lil associates and y'all wanted some good will hunting shit to happen, but <said dumbass developer is no matt damon"
Them: "YOU CaNt JusT UsE ThaT lanGUAGE"
"Am i gonna fix this shit?"
"Well......no one else kno...."
Me: "exactly"
Legit man i am sick and tired of this shit. I did not earn a B.S in comp sci. Graduated in the top percentage of my class, am suffering through my MCS to fix php like a fucking moron all day.The rest of my web devs backed me up.
Aaaand btw..no, it is not my job. I am a fucking analyst, i provide data reports, i program said reports, i am tasked with this shit because i used to work for then as a web tech.....got a different position cuz i was tired of it...fuck me right?18 -
SMM: Can you chat over the phone? Just want to make sure we are on the same page! I am not great with web lingo!
Me: Sure.
Me, internally: You're a social media manager. That's literally your one fucking job.3 -
Oh man. Mine are the REASON why people dislike PHP.
Biggest Concern: Intranet application for 3 staff members that allows them to set the admin data for an application that our userbase utilizes. Everything was fucking horrible, 300+ php files of spaghetti that did not escape user input, did not handle proper redirects, bad algo big O shit and then some. My pain point? I was testing some functionality when upon clicking 3 random check boxes you would get an error message that reads something like this "hi <SENSITIVE USERNAME DATA> you are attempting to use <SERVER IP ADDRESS> using <PASSWORD> but something went wrong! Call <OLD DEVELOPER's PHONE NUMBER> to provide him this <ERROR CODE>"
I panicked, closed that shit and rewrote it in an afternoon, that fucking retard had a tendency to use over 400 files of php for the simplest of fucking things.
Another one, that still baffles me and the other dev (an employee that has been there since the dawn of time) we have this massive application that we just can't rewrite due to time constraints. there is one file with (shit you not) a php include function that when you reach the file it is including it is just......a php closing tag. Removing it breaks down the application. This one is over 6000 files (I know) and we cannot understand what in the love of Lerdorf and baby Torvalds is happening.
From a previous job we had this massive in-house Javascript "framework" for ajax shit that for whatever reason unknown to me had a bunch of function and object names prefixed with "hotDog<rest of the function name>", this was used by two applications. One still in classic ASP and the other in php version 4.something
Legacy apps written in Apache Velocity, which in itself is not that bad, but I, even as a PHP developer, do not EVER mix views with logic. I like my shit separated AF thank you very much.
A large mobile application that interfaced with fucking everything via webviews. Shit was absolutley fucking disgusting, and I felt we were cheating our users.
A rails app with 1000 controller methods.
An express app with 1000 router methods with callbacks instead of async await even though async await was already a thing.
ultraFuckingLarge Delphi project with really no consideration for best practices. I, to this day enjoy Object Pascal, but the way in which people do delphi can scare me.
ASP.NET Application in wich there seemed to be a large portion of bolted in self made ioc framework from the lead dev, absolute shitfest, homie refused to use an actual ioc framework for it, they did pay the price after I left.
My own projects when I have to maintain them.9 -
You fucking son of a bitch!
First you make me do a project in two fucking months, and that's a fucking job-load for only one dev to deliver a SPA with payments and whatsoever.
Then you pushed me to accelerate deployment date and there I am, getting tired and using time I don't have.
But oh no, you prick, that wasn't enough, you had to do just one thing. YOU HAD TO DO ONE FUCKING THING!
What's that? Oh, sorry, I thought I overheard that you wanted to accept online payments but YOU'RE NOT FUCKING SIGNED UP, YOUR BUSSINESS IS NOT LEGAL UNTIL YOU REGISTER IT.
Motherfucker, I can't do anything, you better fucking register your bussiness if you want this to work the way it's supposed to do. -
YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKERS!
Are you fucking serious? How it is possible that you, being a fucking teacher in a PRIVATE UNI, AREN'T ABLE TO FUCKING DEPLOY A .NET CORE WEB PAGE EVEN THOUGH I FUCKING WROTE YOU A PDF, LINKED TO MS DOCUMENTATION AND EVEN WENT TO TELL YOU HOW TO DO IT?
You fucking prick, and now you argue to your superiors that we aren't doing our job as expected... seriously? ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID SERIOUS?
I hope you choke on the turkey this christmas, you ignorant incompetent cheap slut... ha, you're not even cheap, because parents are paying THE SCHOOL to provide them with "supposed" better infrastructure, education than a public one, BUT YOU COME TO TELL ME I MUST CODE YOUR ANCIENT PAGE IN FUCKING ASPX WITH DOCUMENTATION DATED 4 YEARS AGO?
Yeez... seriously dude, level up or GTFO.12 -
!(!rant)
So I wanted a raise and the only way was becoming a software lead.
With that title you get more money but also more responsibility, so you have the last word in technical decisions, you review architecture, do tech interviews, guide the less experienced, etc. I can handle that, even as introverted as I am.
What nobody told me was that I was going to spend my whole time on fucking meetings, one after another, I have not touched my IDE in days, I hate this shit already.
Careful what you wish for they say, so true, I'm stuck here and I hate my job now, probably going to quit as soon as I recover my life, if ever.4 -
I'm so close to giving up. Yesterday, I travelled 4 hours in one direction for a job interview for a graduate position as a web developer. As I arrived at the interview, I was welcomed by a senior dev and one of the HR people.
I sit down and they start explaining how everything will commence(standard procedure stuff) and afterwards hand me the technical test. At this time I am super calm cause I did my homework, checked out their products, their websites and knew right away what I was going to work on. As I turn the page, I see at the top with huge fucking capital letters "JAVA OOP test".
I take a minute and look back at them, like wtf is happening. Turns out that they are looking for a java dev. They picked me for the role because I had literally 1 fucking sentence in my CV and where I have said that I studied java in one semester of uni. FYI my entire portfolio, cv and cover letter are focused on JS, html, css both for client and server side.
As the fucking HR guy stood there and asked me "is there something wrong", I felt broken inside. For the first time in my fucking life I felt like I was done and couldn't continue anymore. I felt like this is some bitch-slap from karma about something but I still can't figure out what. I just walked out of there being unable to realize what happened.
I just feel like I should end my developer career before it has even started, just go do business analysis or something. Why the fuck would someone put a job description entirely talking about Angular, Less/SASS, bootstrap and jQuery and then say that is a Java dev OOP role. Who the fuck allows those people to take good salaries yet still deliver the up most shittiest quality service.
Before the interview, I checked out their websites which are simply horrendous with the comparability of a fucking baked potato. Idk really what to do, I don't mean to sound as a whiny little b.... but as I walked out of their office, I felt broken inside. Sorry for the long rant.8 -
I know I am late to this but I have a happy story for this one.
My first dev job was awesome. Except for the pay. I had interviewed and taken the job based on the fact that I was done with my master's degree, but because of a paperwork snafu I wouldn't be receiving my degree until the spring. I was assured that if I provided proof of my degree when it was awarded I would get a pay rise in relation to my education. Well that was not to be. So this professionally and socially inept bitch I was working with was going to be ahead of me in her career because the people I worked for gave pay raises based on time served rather than ability and education.
So I started interviewing for other positions. Especially after government furloughs cut my pay by 20% for 11 weeks, causing me to max out my credit cards. All of my coworkers had my back. They went to the upper management and the higher ranking military people we worked for and explained the situation. They were my job references for my interviews. They got me a job that paid double what I was making. I still get the warm fuzzies thinking about it.
They were some of the sweetest people I had ever worked with. One of them gave my mom and brother a ride to the airport when I crashed my car. They bought me lunch when I was in dire straights. I really would have loved to stay but I couldn't afford it. That and winter in Utah fucking blows.2 -
Removes stubborn programs? Oh by 'stubborn' you mean the kind of programs where i click on the X on a window and the default button on the confirmation dialog isn't the one that closes the window but instead I have to click on 'cancel'? Yeah I fucking hate those programs too.
The fucking cunts who write the code for this should be making subway sandwiches for a living because they don't deserve programming as a job.4 -
I've just noticed an app review that I've given and would fit right into the wk123 (that's the insult one, right?).
"Biggest pile of junk that I've ever seen. You have one job! To register the fucking phone number (which you could get with Phone permission) and verify it (which you can do with the SMS permission) and you should either have the user do that once upon installation or you automate it entirely so that it can run in the background! You can fully automate this, and it's not that complicated that it needs 10 whole seconds of loading time in between! Heck, this pile of crap can't even continue into the main view after entering the verification code! You haven't published the source code (and maybe that's for the best) but if it was, I'd probably immediately get cancer by viewing your crappy spaghetti code. Dear developer, please take a step back and (re)join the PC tech support guys. You have no place in the development world."
To top it all off, that app currently only needs phone permission to verify my number (at least they've done that much). So I figured, I've already gone through that authentication flow so let's remove that permission to abide by the principle of least privilege.
Except that the fucking crapp just goes through the "requires phone permission" shit again whenever that permission removal happens. Fucking piece of garbage!!! That such spaghetti code fuckers even have a job, it boggles my mind.4 -
I hate being a fucking tech support dude. Everyone thinks it is my job to fix their device. Some girl asked me to replace her iPhone 6 plus screen a few days ago. I reluctantly said yes. I bought a screen. And I started the process. I opened the box for the new screen and it was just the screen with no digitizer. That was completely my fault. I was an idiot. I immediately buy the correct one on amazon and tell the girl, I'm sorry you won't have a phone for two days. As soon as the new package comes in, I will do the repair.
3 Days Later: Today.
Her: Has it come in yet?
Me: No, I'm going to call Amazon
Amazon: We're sorry, the thing you asked for was out of stock, you'll have to buy it again.
He was very nice, and he gave me free shipping, but this was not my fault!
Her: I have to wait 2 more days? That's like a whole week without a phone!
I had to do this for free and pay $40 for the new part. I am never telling anyone I am a developer again. I feel so fucking bad, and she's mad. And I can't do anything about it.6 -
Oh Christ.. just been looking for hosting companies here in Belgium to look for sysadmin positions.. one of the fucking companies posted this: "we provide Uptime-as-a-Service"
The fucking cringe!!! Uptime as a service! Everything including the only fucking job a hoster has, keeping shit up and running.. as a service.. fuck!4 -
I’m back for a fucking rant.
My previous post I was happy, I’ve had an interview today and I felt the interviewer acted with integrity and made the role seem worthwhile. Fuck it, here’s the link:
https://www.devrant.io/rants/889363
So, since then; the recruiter got in touch: “smashed it son, sending the tech demo your way, if you can get it done this evening that would be amazing”
Obviously I said based on the exact brief I think that’s possible, I’ll take a look and let them know if it isn’t.
Having done loads of these, I know I can usually knock them out and impress in an evening with no trouble.
Here’s where shit gets fucked up; i opened the brief.
I was met with a brief for an MVP using best practice patterns and flexing every muscle with the tech available...
Then I see the requirements, these fucking dicks are after 10 functional requirements averaging an hour a piece.
+TDD so * 1.25,
+DI and dependency inversion principle * 1.1
+CI setup (1h on this platform)
+One ill requirement to use a stored proc in SQL server to return a view (1h)
+UX/UI design consideration using an old tech (1-2h)
+unobtrusive jquery form post validation (2h)
+AES-256 encryption in the db... add 2h for proper testing.
These cunts want me to knock 15-20h of Work into their interview tech demo.
I’ve done a lot of these recently, all of them topped out at 3h max.
The job is middling: average package, old tech, not the most exciting or decent work.
The interviewer alluded to his lead being a bit of a dick; one of those “the code comes first” devs.
Here’s where shit gets realer:
They’ve included mock ups in the tech demo brief’s zip... I looked at them to confirm I wasn’t over estimating the job... I wasn’t.
Then I looked at the other files in the fucking zip.
I found 3 of the images they wanted to use were copyright withheld... there’s no way these guys have the right to distribute these.
Then I look in the font folder, it’s a single ttf, downloaded from fucking DA Font... it was published less than 2mo ago, the license file had been removed: free for Personal, anything else; contact me.
There’s no way these guys have any rights to this font, and I’ve never seen a font redistributed legally without it’s accompanying licence files.
This fucking company is constantly talking about its ethical behaviours.
Given that I know what I’m doing; I know it would have taken less time to find free-for-commercial images and use a google font... this sloppy bullshit is beyond me.
Anyway, I said I’d get back to the recruiter, he wasn’t to know and he’s a good guy. I let him know I’d complete the tech demo over the weekend, he’s looked after me and I don’t want him having trouble with his client...
I’ll substitute the copyright fuckery with images I have a license for because there’s no way I’m pushing copyright stolen material to a public github repo.
I’ll also be substituting the topic and leaving a few js bombs in there to ensure they don’t just steal my shit.
Here’s my hypotheses, anyone with any more would be greatly welcomed...
1: the lead dev is just a stuck up arsehole, with no real care for his work and a relaxed view on stealing other people’s.
2: they are looking for 15-20h free work on an MVP they can modify and take to market
3: they are looking for people to turn down this job so they can support someone’s fucking visa.
In any case, it’s a shit show and I’ll just be seeing this as box checking and interview practice...
Arguments for 1: the head told me about his lead’s problems within 20mn of the interview.
2: he said his biggest problem was getting products out quickly enough.
3: the recruiter told me they’d been “picky”, and they’re making themselves people who can’t be worked for.
I’m going to knock out the demo, keep it private and protect my work well. It’s going to smash their tits off because I’m a fucking great developer... I’ll make sure I get the offer to keep the recruiter looked after.
Then fuck those guys, I’m fucking livid.
After a wonderful interview experience and a nice introduction to the company I’ve been completely put off...
So here’s the update: if you’re interviewing for a shitty middle level dev position, amongst difficult people, on an out of date stack... you need people to want you, don’t fuck them off.
If they want my time to rush out MVPs, they can pay my day rate.
Fuuuuuuuuck... I typed this out whilst listening to the podcast, I’m glad I’m not the only one dealing with shit.
Oh also; I had a lovely discriminatory as fuck application, personality test and disability request email sent to me from a company that seems like it’s still in the 90s. Fuck those guys too, I reported them to the relevant authorities and hope they’re made to look at how morally reprehensible their recruitment process is. The law is you don’t ask if the job can be done by anyone.6 -
Pattern I'm noticing...
*email* Hey, can you help me with my code, I don't know why it's not working...*end email*
no comments. if you wrote the shit and don't know what the blazes it's doing, how am i supposed to know what you broke? I'm not a mind reader, I don't know what you were thinking when you wrote the code.
true, I could go through and read it and try to figure it out, but then i'll be cranky and much less likely to want to help you in the future because you're causing unnecessary work, and part of my job is to get you ready for work environments, and I WILL DO EVERYTHING IN MY FUCKING POWER TO MAKE YOU THE ONE PERSON THAT EVERYONE DOESN'T HATE, BUT I WILL HATE YOU FOREVER BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSING ME THE HELL OFF.1 -
Job posts that look for experience in everything! Experience in large scale enterprise kubernetes bullshit! What the fuck is kubernetes, a Greek god?? 4 plus years experience in aws! 5 years experience in cloud infrastructure scaling! 5 years experience in working with stakeholders and collaborating UX design! 5 years experience in React Native! 5 years experience in noSQL! 5 years experience in firebase! 5 years experience in graphics design! 5 years experience in node CSS! And every javascript known to mankind! I would love to meet this legendary developer that every company seems to want! Sick of these ads that ask for god level experience in every development role or tech. It’s like they’re hiring one developer to write their entire system from scratch which would obviously require godly expertise in front back and every fucking end there is to fucking build10
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TLDR: SAP sucks. Don't ever work with it. Run away from it. Delete it from your memory. If your company works with it, quit. It's the best you can do.
A couple of weeks ago the group rant was "Story of your best/worst career choice" and I talked about the contract I signed. Even tho that is still true and I still feel like that, I think I got a new worst choice:
WORKING WITH SAP.
When I got this job I knew it would be SAP, but I didn't know what SAP was. I just thought "it's programming, how bad can it be?" OH BOII.
If only I would have done some FUCKING RESEARCH I would know this would be a mistake!!
And I knew I didn't want to work with this, I knew I wanted to be a web developer, but I STILL ACCEPTED THE JOB OH MAN WHAT WAS I THINKING I'M SO MAD.
Were I live we all have the same mentality when looking for the first job, which is to just accept anything you can get, because it's your first job, you need to work and to get experience, even if it's a bad job or if you know you won't like it. When my intership was ending, I told my parents I didn't want to stay there because they treat their employes like shit, and the salary is terrible. They told me to still accept it if they offered because I still need a job (this one was web tho) and experience.
So, of course, since I was looking for my first job, was told this my entire live, always thought like that and they were the first to contact me, I accepted it.
BIGGEST FUCKING MISTAKE!! DON'T THINK LIKE THIS!! AND STOP TELLING KIDS THIS!! IT'S NOT A GOOD MENTALITY!!!
ALSO DON'T WORK WITH SAP! EVER!24 -
Everyday I fell my soul being sucked by this job.
We have too much liberty and it's all scattered, every fucking project uses a different framework.
Everything is a mess, no one seems to care and I'm feeling like shit for being the only one that seems to care.
Every time I start job hunting I fell depressed because of this nonsense bullshit they call job requirements.
Just wanna run away from this mess and never look back.13 -
Fresh out of dropping out of uni with a real heaping of newly diagnosed depression.
Get job in the industry.
Absolute joke of a company, spiral even further.
Thus begins the saga of boom / bust and the universe / myself fucking me over just as things get good that has been the last 8 years of my life.
Maybe one day I’ll write properly about my experience of mental health, in industry, in welfare and in my family too.
Suffice it to say, anything that leads you to take a whole year out, as well as makes you question whether what you thought was your dream job is actually right for you - is, ultimately, the definition of burnout.
tl;dr - the last 8 years have been a fucking burnout episode.1 -
Because I’m a fucking cowboy and a charlatan, and because I hate sleep and despise feeling refreshed and happy, I’m working pretty much full time as a contractor (I’m the full stack dev. I do everything) on a (well funded) startup alongside my day job.
Tonight I had to make some quick (lol “quick”) changes to a core piece of the platform.
Now before continuing please refer back to the first line of this rant.
So instead of writing new functionality, I copied and pasted another section.
I renamed all references of “new_order” to, cleverly “new_order2”.
I know.
I deploy to production...
My phone starts blowing up. In short, everything is fucked.
I’m going over the query, checking the production database. Why is this manifesting like this? It all looks correct.
2 HOURS of broken sales, pissed off customers, pissed off service agents and I see that there was still one reference of “new_order” that should have been “new_order2”.
I am a piece of shit.4 -
Everyone was a noob once. I am the first to tell that to everyone. But there are limits.
Where I work we got new colleagues, fresh from college, claims to have extensive knowledge about Ansible and knows his way around a Linux system.... Or so he claims.
I desperately need some automation reinforcements since the project requires a lot of work to be done.
I have given a half day training on how to develop, starting from ssh keys setup and local machine, the project directory layout, the components the designs, the scripts, everything...
I ask "Do you understand this?"
"Yes, I understand. " Was the reply.
I give a very simple task really. Just adapt get_url tasks in such a way that it accepts headers, of any kind.
It's literally a one line job.
A week passes by, today is "deadline".
Nothing works, guy confuses roles with playbooks, sets secrets in roles hardcodes, does not create inventory files for specifications, no playbooks, does everything on the testing machine itself, abuses SSH Keys from the Controller node.... It's a fucking ga-mess.
Clearly he does not understand at all what he is doing.
Today he comes "sorry but I cannot finish it"
"Why not?" I ask.
"I get this error" sends a fucking screenshot. I see the fucking disaster setup in one shot ...
"You totally have not done the things like I taught you. Where are your commits and what are.your branch names?"
"Euuuh I don't have any"
Saywhatnow.jpeg
I get frustrated, but nonetheless I re-explain everything from too to bottom! I actually give him a working example of what he should do!
Me: "Do you understand now?"
Colleague: "Yes, I do understand now?"
Me: "Are you sure you understand now?"
C: "yes I do"
Proceeds to do fucking shit all...
WHY FUCKING LIE ABOUT THE THINGS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND??? WHAT KIND OF COGNITIVE MALFUNCTION IA HAPPENING IN YOUR HEAD THAT EVEN GIVEN A WORKING EXAMPLE YOU CANT REPLICATE???
WHY APPLY FOR A FUCKING JOB AND LIE ABOUT YOUR COMPETENCES WHEN YOU DO T EVEN GET THE FUCKING BASICS!?!?
WHY WASTE MY FUCKING TIME?!?!?!
Told my "dear team leader" (see previous rants) that it's not okay to lie about that, we desperately need capable people and he does not seem to be one of them.
"Sorry about that NeatNerdPrime but be patient, he is still a junior"
YOU FUCKING HIRED THAT PERSON WITH FULL KNOWLEDGE ABOUT HAI RESUME AND ACCEPTED HIS WORDS AT FACE VALUE WITHOUT EVEN A PROPER TECHNICAL TEST. YOU PROMISED HE WAS CAPABLE AND HE IS FUCKING NOT, FUCK YOU AND YOUR PEOPLE MANAGEMENT SKILLS, YOU ALREADY FAIL AT THE START.
FUCK THIS. I WILL SLACK OFF TODAY BECAUSE WITHOUT ME THIS TEAM AND THIS PROJECT JUST CRUMBLES DOWN DUE TO SHEER INCOMPETENCE.5 -
!dev
I'm always somewhat pissed off since i don't have a developer job - barely even a tech job. I scan patient charts into pdfs > a server, and that's as complicated as my job description gets. i sit and scan. my computer is (supposed to be) nothing other than a display for managing the scanned charts.
what really killed me though is that one time, we got a new MFC because our old one was, well, obviously broken beyond their patience level. They told me i'd be "Helping".
I got to cut open the box.
whoop dee fucking doo. Tech assist of the century ladies and gents.
That being ine of the worst cases, there's always the times when they talk to their IT guy and never forget to call him an asshole after simply because they don't like it when they don't understand stuff. I've texted him a few times and he's actually very pleasant to talk with and does his job well. just grinds my gears
(and being the IT guy is not available as an alternative. the job is 1. obviously filled, and 2. I installed a word document password bruteforcer, which they in turn told the doctor who told the IT guy and made it sound like i had developed it - of course, this being a pretty professional clinic, he suggested i get fired. so now any hope of me actually doing what I love there is pretty hopelessly out of my reach>2 -
Well, devRant has turned me from a bigot arse into quite the humble and decent person, and on top of that, introduced me to some new series (well more so the users than the platform, but you know what I mean).
Binge watched Silicon Valley (season one, I just started) and learnt about dick to floor ratio.
Prior to that binge watched Mr Robot. Cannot remember who suggested that, so I cannot attribute the appropriate gratitude to the appropriate person here.
Add to that that I no longer claim one language to be holy amongst others. Yeah. I was that dick before, we all have a bad side. I'm just admitting it.
I sat down and started utilising other languages, and even found quite a few that did what I wanted more efficiently. Plus I have gotten to meet some sharp people and broaden my own mind.
Fuck I hate my job, but I see a fucking brilliant future for myself thanks to coding and the open mind that I have attained. I attribute this to devRant (perhaps it was lying dormant, but you guys awoke it.).
Enough chitty chat, I'm off to sleep and then code my balls off.2 -
Tl;dr: I do not care. Just read it or fuck off.
A friend of mine who is a paki classmate, as well, had applied for the same "Ausbildung" offer as me half a year ago.
The company is based in Germany, but is working in the US, France, UK, Turkey, China, [...], too.
After 2 interviews, they told us to contact us back within the next week. We have had our interviews on Sundays.
In the list of all candidates I was the second best. The top candidate was my classmate. The third best candidate was a guy who was involved in the last interview with both, me and my paki friend.
The candidates list was not shown to everyone else, but my paki friend.
They wanted to give him the job. [That is a big company who is creating a new dev team and expanding their IT building. Nonetheless they only accept only one candidate.]
My classmate had been given a letter that he had to sign within the same hour he was with the managers. He discussed it and said that he has other offers open and want to compare them first. They gave him a timespan of only 1 day afterwards to sign it.
He told me he is going to decline it and he did.
Normally, I should have been the person who gets the letter to sign to be accepted for the job, but no.
After letting me wait for almost 2 weeks, they sent me an mail (they usually sent ordinary letters to invite me to interviews lol) in which they said that I am unfortunately not taken for the job yada yada yada and that they wish me luck for my future.
Fuck yourselves. How about that?
I was the second best candidate. The best candidate did not want the job yet you fucking morons do this type of shit. You want the best for me?
I want the worse for you. Death to both of you managers who sucked all of my energy, patience and time.
I am really fucking pissed rn21 -
Fuck recruiters, they are the scum of the earth. I just had one contact me out of the blue about two opportunities with companies I'd never heard off. As I knew nothing about the companies I started asking questions around who they were and what they were looking to do. He suddenly gets all defensive and refuses to answer my questions, then follows up with an email accusing me of being an "underhanded recruiter" looking to poach his clients. Sorry mate, you got in contact with me you absolute fuckwit. Without people like us you wouldn't even have a bloody job you fucking vampire. For someone that supposedly specialises in the tech sector, I had to point out that if he really doubted who I was he could drop my name into StackOverflow or github to verify that im a developer. Recruiters - they're all fucking leeches.4
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GO AND FUCK YOURSELVES. MANY PEOPLE RANT ABOUT JOB HUBTING AND INSANE REQUIREMENTS. SO HERE IN SPAIN I'M SURE THE SITUATION IS WORSE. NO FUCKING JOBS. WHEN YOU FIND AN OFFER THAT DOESN'T MENTION PHP, JAVA OR COBOL OHH. YOU NEED TO BE A FUCKING WP, FULL STACK, ANDROID AND IOS DEVELOPER, A FUCKING SYSADMIN AND HAVE 99 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. SO YOU CAN SAY: hey search a junior offer! YEAH SURE ONE SECOND. 4-15 FUCKING YEARS OF FUCKING EXPERIENCE. GO AND FUCK YOURSELVES AAAAH7
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My company just did its first delivery to a new big customer , got the acceptance docs signed etc.
Was pretty funny to see management and the business-tards furiously emailing one another with company wide replyAll
Congratulating one another over an excellent job they had done in particular,
for example :
Gavin : Ahh capital , well done john for your undertaking in this tremendous accomplishment
John: oh and thank YOU for your guidance Gavin, couldnt have done it without you, we really exceeded outselves with the hard work we put it, also a big mention to (insert another inbred manager's name)
And that keeps on bouncing on and on
( absolutely no fucking mention of devs who did the actual Work, nooo nooo just a brief reference to us as "the boys in london"....)
Kinda glad they aren't in office most of the time else this level of back-patting would have probably turned into a circle jerk in the board room.
Almost thought of getting the dev teams to join the storm of emails and start randomly congratulating one another too with company wide replyAlls but that kind of prank would likely be ill received by out high and mighty leaders.
( on the flip side maybe they would actually learn out names)3 -
Everytime I'm digging into some random legacy code where no one knows its original intention I'm seeing "Software Archeologist" as a well-paid job sooner or later...
Fucking undocumented legacy code...1 -
I've promised to do the Mozilla rant about the whole meritocracy thing a few days ago.. well, this is that. Along with some other stuff along the way. Haven't ranted for a couple of days man, shit happened! But losing 6 days that could've been spent on finishing my power supply project.. to a stupid cold, it got a little bit on my nerves, so that's what I've been working on for the time being. Hopefully I'll be able to finish it up in a couple of days.
1. COCKtail party thingy
Turns out that there's this conference in Brussels in a couple of days about the whole Article 13 copyright stuff. I've been letting a mail to the MEP's about it mature on my systems for a while now.. well, maturing or procrastinating, you be the judge 😛
Now I'm glad that I waited with that though. It's mostly a developer-centric insight into how the directive would be a horrible idea.. think AI, issues with context recognition, Tom Scott's video on Penistone and Scunthorpe etc etc. But maybe I can include some stuff from the event afterwards.
Also, if you're coming to the conference too, do let me know! Little devRant meet while we're at it, it'd be fucking great! I'll try to remember to bring my Christmas ducks, they've got these cute little Santa hats 😋
(P.S.: about the whole COCKtail, I saw the email while drunk and during registration I had to choose an email address.. I figured, feminazis are doing such a great job at going out of their way to find offense in everything, I figured that I'd make their job a little bit easier by sending a COCK bomb in my registration mail address, in the hopes that it finds its way to one of them.. evil, I know XD)
2. The whole feminazi stuff at Mozilla
So Mozilla hates meritocracy now? I've been wanting to rant about the big bad meritocracy for a while now. Thank you Mozilla for giving me an incentive to actually do it!
Meritocracy, feminazis think it's bad because it's about power relationships and discrimination, right? But what if I told you that that is exactly what makes great software great. Good code, good merit, is what's welcomed in software development.. or at least it should be. Because it's a job of fucking knowledge, experience, and quality! Also, meritocracy is a great thing because nobody cares if you're a professional developer in a suit, getting paid to work on a piece of OSS, or a homegamer neonazi who's coding shit in their underwear while wanking to child porn.. nobody fucking cares. If your code, your merit, is good, contribute ahead! Super inclusive, yet apparently bad because bad code is excluded to ensure the health of the project.
So what is the alternative to the big bad meritocracy? Inclusion (or as it's looked like in practice, more like exclusion) based on gender/sex, political orientation, things like that. But not actual fucking merit, the ability to write good code. How the fuck is politics and gender going to be any good at all to an inherently meritocratic craft?! Oh but yeah, it's great for inclusion. It's like females in tech. Artificial growth is just a matter of growth numbers and the only folks who like it are fucking HR and wanketeering cunts, and feminazis. Merit, that's what matters!! And have you ever considered that females are generally not interested in technology? Or for that matter, where's our inclusion movement for men in healthcare?! Gender equality my ass.
That's just my two cents on it of course. Meritocracy shouldn't be abandoned in tech. And even if it's just a matter of calling it something else. How the fuck is it a good idea to not call a pot a fucking pot just because someone might take offense at it?! It's meritocracy, call it fucking meritocracy!!! And while we're at it, call a master a fucking master and a slave a fucking slave!15 -
That's it. I've had enough.
I lost my job yesterday (again) and the Irish cumstain who lives in the room next to me got pissed last night and kicked my door in because he thought I had his phone(?) and was ignoring him, when I was at work.
Long story short, he ripped my friends back door apart, tried to fight me (which ended with me chasing him down the street with a plank).
Police came and did a wonderful job as always by making us shake hands and 'promise' to leave each other alone.
THIS ISN'T FUCKING PRIMARY SCHOOL. DRAG HIM AWAY BEFORE I DO, YOU IGNORANT FUCKING PIGS.
Oh, and my 'friend' then had a schizophrenic episode and blamed it all on me(?!?). I then went to buy 2 bottles of vodka and decided to get pissed before trying to kill myself.
Ah, I love humans. Dirty, ignorant, blood sucking bags of sweaty meat and delicate bone. I really want to turn this Irish cunt into a skinsack of blood and guts, but I'm waiting patiently. He's going to wake up one night tied up and gagged, with me dragging him to a forest somewhere far far away...
Is it weird that I want to make him scream, cry, and shit himself at the same time?11 -
The story of the shittiest, FUCKING WORST day of work.
TLDR: shitty day at work, car crash to end the day.
So, let tell you about what could possibly be the worst day I had since I started working.
This morning, my alarm didn't work, woke up 30 minutes before an appointment I had with a client.
Arrived late at the client, as I start deploying. They don't have any way to transfer the deployment package to the secured server. Lost 45 minutes there.
Deployment goes pretty well. My client asks me to stay while they load some data into the app. Everything's pretty easy to work out. Just need to input 3 CSV with the correct format (which the client defined since the beginning).
I end up watching an Excel Macro called "Brigitte" (I'm not fucking kinding, could'nt have thought of that) work for 4 hours straight. Files are badly formatted and don't work.
Troubbleshooting thoses files with a fucking loader that does not tell you anything about why it failed (our fault on that one)
I leave the client at 7:30pm, going back at work, leave at 9pm.
At this point, I just want to buy some food, go home and watch series.
But NO, A FUCKING MORRON OF A BUS DRIVER had to switch lanes as I was overtaking him. Getting me crushed between the bus and the concrete blocks.
Cops were fucking dickheads, being very mean even tho I was still shaking from the adrenaline.
In conclusion, the day could have been worst. The devs at the clients are pretty cool guys and we actually had some fun troubleshooting. At work, there was still one of my colleagues who cheered me up telling me about his day.
And when I think of it, I could have got really hurt (or even worst) in the crash.
A bad day is a bad day, tomorrow morning I'm still going to get up and go to a job I love, with people I love working with.
Very big rant (sorry about that if someone's still reading)9 -
You can't call me a "nut job" on Lync then five minutes later dump your fucking work experience kid on me so that I can "tell him what to type" and "let him do some of the work". I'm a paid technical intern, not your fucking babysitter, so maybe you should pay your own kid attention rather than let somebody else to do it to make you feel superior.
You know fuck all and have needed my help numerous times, and been sheepish every time I've known something you don't. If I helped you with something, say thank you and don't act like my presence perpetually pisses you off. Sit down and show me some respect, as I always have to you, or I'll report you to HR for being a demeaning twat. Your call.
Or perhaps I could have a word with the new Director you've been arse-licking. I'm sure he'd love to hear that you have been treating like shit the one guy who can save you from the shit show of having no idea how to do the task you've been set.
I know I'm an intern but come on, I could take your job tomorrow if I didn't have a degree to go back to. If you keep being a shit to people then one day I will actually do it!5 -
Recent boot camp grad here with a solid portfolio...holy crap...this industry is so illogical...got a call from a recruiter whose job needs 3 years experience. I demonstrated I know every single one of the requirements, have implemented them, know pros and cons, etc. She says OK I'll run it by my manager and see because we can't fill the spot and it requires 3 years but you meet all the qualifications. I get an email the next day, and she says sorry, we actually need 5 years...fucking face palm...I'll apply again in 5 years because that job will still be open. Really sucks that the only thing holding me back from landing a job is experience, not knowledge. No employer wants to touch me with a 10 foot pole...how long will it take be to find a job...jesus christ.12
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I don’t like to judge people based on what languages they like (because I like all of them). But I can’t deny the pattern anymore.
Smart people know and enjoy smart languages: Smalltalk, OCaml, Clojure, Lisp, Haskell, etc. They may use JavaScript or PHP to make money, but ask them to code in their smart language and they’ll be more efficient. Getting old, some of those people say “screw it” and find a Haskell job.
You, my friend, are not one of those people. You are VSCode-dwelling goblin who thinks lambda calculus has something to do with JS arrow function notation, is scared of reduce() and not even good at the single fucking language they know.
Insta coders and that mechanical keyboard collector dorks are not “superstars” you got to be like.11 -
Last I started my new job, and I got 2 new laptops (one from my job, amd a separate from the client, as I'll be there full time for at least a year). The work one was pricy af imo (P50, ~2500$ ex. VAT), then I got the client one... wtf is wrong with these people, the laptop cost fucking 6000$ (again, ex. VAT).
Now on the personal side I'm cheap as fuck, and the current laptop I use is one that was meant to be scrapped at my old job that I took home to fix. While it's fun getting those laptops, my brain cannot stop thinking "why the fuck do I need 64 gb ram, 2tb storage and 500gb NVME ssd to basically write text?"16 -
Just checked a pr I need to take care of tomorrow…
“Please review [other pr] first, this solves a bug the other one introduces”
…Ah yes. Stupidity.
“Already tested by QA, accept without comments or job will be wasted.”
… I need a vacation or a megaphone to make someone deaf by screaming in their ears again and again: “follow the fucking processes instead of making QA preapprove your shitty code.”2 -
Before I finally managed to move out of my parents' place, they nonstop kept annoying me by saying I should get a "real job". They thought I was only playing games or browse random unimportant stuff on the computer...
Nowadays they think I "kreate" websites (as Karlie Kloss would pronounce it).
My mother one time was so fucking annoying about my job, I got so pissed off, I threw in her face her that I earn three times what she gets and I have much more responsibility and brain requiring work and that her single-cell brain would never understand what I am doing the whole fucking day.
Since then we dont talk much about work anymore.
Fucking parents... the best thing that happened to me was moving out of their shitty place and their poisonous attitude.1 -
My first project at the job was implenting a website, designed by the same company we mostly worked with.
It was very stressful because half of the 2 months calculated for finishing the project, these genius designers needed for their design. Until then, I had almost no tasks to do...
When the designs finally came, I worked on it and two weeks later was a meeting for review and to decide about some details.
These fuckers then concluded, that the whole design did not fit the page and that they would rework it.
Two weeks later, on the planned release day, we finally received it. A completely fucking different design! Wow!
My boss was pretty angry and so was I. We had to move the release 4 weeks ahead, the client was pissed like a stinking hobo and it needed a lot of convincing to keep that client...
It's fucking nerve-wracking as well that we always have to wait in most projects for weeks for clients or designers to add the content before we can publish a website.
They don't seem to care if they have 2 months or 2 weeks, we never were able to release one single project on time, because of these lazy fuckers...3 -
*WanBLowS shits itself as usual in BSOD*
FEATUREFUL FUCKING JOKE OF AN OPERATING SYSTEM..!!!! How about you do the only thing that you're good at - casual shit like letting me watch a fucking anime! - and do it properly?! Yes there's an rsync from btrfs to btrfs going on in the background - because yes I fucking detest your joke of a filesystem called NTFS!! Should that even matter?! ONE FUCKING JOB!!!
Meanwhile my tablet, a fucking €120 cheapie!! It can stay up and running - stable! - for fucking weeks in a row, only taken down by me forgetting to charge the bloody thing every few days. But yeah it's gotta be a hardware issue, it's gotta be an obscure setup. NO IT'S A FUCKING CRAPTACULAR SHIT OS!!! If only those Microshit certified enganeers would write a goddamn line of DECENT CODE!!!
(As for anyone who doesn't know already that I've tried countless times to convert this turd to Linux.. It's an Intel + Nvidia GPU hybrid and it doesn't even boot a Linux live session. Believe me, I've tried.)7 -
I had a delivery deadline on the same day when an urgent support request came in. My boss was a stupid sucker who was afraid of taking responsibility, and that's a vice I absolutely hate with bosses.
We had quite a heated argument where he just wanted me to give priority to both things, which I declined because I had no idea how much time the support research would take me.
Finally, he decided that I should work on the support item immediately, but only for up to one hour. He was totally surprised when I accepted that without further argument. I told him that all I had wanted from him had been a priority decision, and that was one.
Felt like explaining to my boss what his fucking job was.4 -
I'm at a pretty cool company today, learning new stack now. Everyone is helpfull and teaches me a lot.
I remember at my first job, when I just started, my boss sent me a MINIFIED .js file (just one file and nothing else) and said "it doesnt work, please fix this". After OBVIOUSLY not being able to fix it, at that moment, I started to doubt my choice to become a web dev.
I turned out to be pretty okay. But, fucking hell, thinking back, that "ex-boss" of mine could potentially influence my later career decisions and not in a good way.4 -
A little back story:
A dev who left already implemented a system and modeled the data like he doesn't even care because he was going away in one month anyway.
This sucker here inherited the responsibility to remodel this fucking clusterfuck of data.
I was trying to do a good work here until today but some things came to my mind :
I don't care.
They don't care.
Fuck it.
I'm gonna do the same shit and the next person can suck ma'dick.
I have better things to do.
Look, I'm gonna do a lazy job that is gonna be a million light years better than what this sucker did anyway.1 -
You motherfucking incompetent useless collection of hairy ballsacks even a trained monkey could do a better job than you do. And I swear once we literally cross the 99% availability rate I will find your headquarters and smash everyone's face into each of your fucking servers then set that whole place on fire.
You forget to flush the DNS cache after moving my server (of course on Friday when else), here is 2 days of error page for my site, whoose instructions a normal user simply couldn't follow. Not to mention it pointed to the wrong article.
Random 503 error, and you aren't answering my phone calls, though usually I am the first one who informs you of a fucking problem with your fucking server and I have to wait 5-10 minutes in line while you are figuring out the problem.
And now random forbidden error for my whole page. Out of nothing. I've changed nothing. You said one hour earlier that it's your mistake and it will took around 30 min. Still nothing.
I'm fed up with all your bullshit. Go fuck yourselves.
I'm out...5 -
One of those days when i feel like complete shit and wish i hadn’t woken up.
I heard back from an interview i did last week (one of the faang type) and the recruiter started with “You didn’t impress any of your interviewers”. Man that hurt. I can’t unhear that. He went ahead to say they all recommended a mid-level role for me (they apparently said i had potential and could easily grow into a senior eng) instead of the senior lead i applied for. This is also subject to getting approval to hire mid-level engineers because the team needs more people but they only got approval to hire senior engineers. This cunt also added “dont worry about it. Just go about your usual business and i’ll call you next week if we have gotten the approval”. Ass! All i can do is worry because that is what i do best.
I think i am more sad and disappointed in myself because i thought the interviews went well. Wrote decent code and came up with good solutions on time. Had a good conversation with interviewers. Apparently for a senior, you cannot make mistakes which i did but once the interviewer gave me a clue, i got back on track.
Anyway, i slept with this anxiety, then woke up with tummy ache. On the drive out this morning to go to the bank, i drove my car into a pole and broke off my side mirror. Then my fucking power generator stopped working. And on my way to go and get my fixed mirror from the mechanic, my exhaust pipe broke in half due to a possible pothole i drove into.
Those fucking days where all that could go wrong goes wrong. My head is fucking pounding i can barely move my head without wincing. I am running out of money fast (i support my entire family) and i am worried about not getting a job. This blow to my confidence makes me feel worthless like i am not good for anything. Recruiter suggested i do another senior engineer interview for a different team which i passed the test for but i know the outcome would most likely be the same and i wanted the first team really bad. I just want to lie in bed and cry all day but this fucking headache won’t let me. -
My developer career has ended before I even start. After failing to get a job, I have started a business men services company. Maybe in the future, I will include software development to the business. So no more rants from my side at least for one year.
Fuck you all fucking retarded companies who wants junior developers with the same experience of senior developers.6 -
Project Manager and I went to a meeting with the client, and a talk started about one task which was estimated to 20, but took us 40 hours to be finished.
The client asked me:
''How is it possible that it took you double of the estimated time?''
and the PM turned his head to my direction and said:
''Really, how did it take you so long?''
ISN'T IT YOUR FUCKING JOB TO ANSWER THOSE KIND OF QUESTIONS2 -
Alright. It's one of these rants that everyone despises. The help me rant. Now before you tell me to google, I have, but I want a more personal opinion on the matter.
I am fluent in JAVA, C#, C++, and a few more, but I have never done web development.
I want to get the fuck out of my current job (I got screamed at because I didn't do the PABX guy's work - I am a fucking programmer not a technician), and start a venture there.
Now I know that I have to learn HTML, CSS, JS -> what more do I need to know to code a fully functional website? I don't mind learning any languages, I like learning. It sounds naive and perhaps stupid, but I am asking for some educated opinions.
Thanks, and soon I will be the fuck out of this hellhole.5 -
Reasons why I hate the hospital I work for...
1. NO fucking budget, for fuck sakes our telecom system is still running Merlin Magix. (I’ve been working on getting the trunk and everything to at least push FreePBX out... Configuration configuration.) but, that requires a decent server to host said system... But guess what? We’ve still got a few servers online that are running server 2012 r2. NO FUCKING BUDGET.
2. Training. They don’t have the budget to send me to training, but the doctors here are rolling in Mercedes... Must be fucking nice.
3. I have 5 f-I-v-e job descriptions. I’m a bio medical technician, network admin, system admin, programmer, and help desk... I fucked up allowing them to know I program.
4. On call 365 days a year. That’s nice and all, but when I’ve got shit to do and the nearest Walmart is an hour away I don’t want a call from Louis “oh the printer has a jam” FUCK OFF LOUIS! Get the paper out, we’ve been over this, I believe in you!
5. Some of the FUCKING (l)users.... You wouldn’t imagine some of the calls I receive, some of my favorite being late late “Hey *anonyops* I know it’s late but we’re needing a chair moved from one room to the other.” FUCK YOU YOU CHEEKY FUCKING CUNT.
The only reason I’m still here is my direct supervisor and a hand full of people that I’ve grown to love. Also, because any computer related job here is either outsourced or filled by a YouTubing god. - reason 1 why I started my own business. Supply and demand.
Rural Kansas Hospitals = shit, inb4 thanks —insert president to blame—20 -
I no longer give a single flying fuck about whether this company I work for lives or dies, whether it succeeds or fails. My compensation has been piss poor compared to the level of dedication I have put in and the level of stress I've endured. Up until now, I was thinking like "well, it's a growing startup, maybe if it succeeds it can have some doors open for me". But fuck it.
I keep hearing about software developers doing pretty well for themselves, but I can barely pay my fucking bills with this shit company in this shit country.
I should've started doing this sooner, and I'm a stupid-ass motherfucker for not having been doing it, but I'll be looking for jobs with actual respectable pay now. I'm not bound by a notice time in my contract, so maybe I'll be telling whatever other companies that I can start with them immediately if they need me to.
Seriously fuck this company and its low-ass compensation. If I'm going to be paid this low, I might as well take a less stressful job with less skill requirements.
I will be jumping ship and I won't be caring one bit if it fucking sinks.5 -
So ..i just got a raise. A substantial one(about 30k more) but......
The cms coordinator is now going to make way more than i do....but not only that he is making way more than my lead developer and my lead developer's salary is now the same as mine.
The man has 12 years of service to this institution. He IS the web software department and if any day him and I decide to cross our arms and not do shit the whole school collapses...both fucking campuses.
Continuing...the cms coordinator doesn't even have the same education that we do. The lead developer has 4 associates degrees and I have a B.S in c.s, the CMS dude has 1 in computer tech or some shit like that.
And he is making about 9k more than us.
I...know it sounds small, and it is, but the principle itself is fucking painful considering that they mentioned job responsibilities was a major contributing factor in said paycheck and we have fucking murdered ourselves working extra every fucking day. Going above and beyond this shit just to have a dude that adds images to a cms make more than we do.
Fucking bullshit.14 -
Man fuck the heat, fuck the chaos and prolonged temporariness of the weeks after uni ends, fuck my executive dysfunction, fuck the job hunt process and fuck my crumbling body that I never bothered to fix because the train ticket was a serious financial commitment and because, again, executive dysfunction.
Fucking hate my situation right now. And the fact that it's not actually bad as far as human situations go doesn't help one bit.2 -
I have been sick for a week now. All I needed was one day of rest. But no, can't rest on the week days because I work late. Can't rest on weekends because work fucking calls me for retarded tasks that they are just too fucking lazy to do themselves.
Look gobknob, I understand you're not paying me overtime. Fuck you for that. But to deny me a day off because "we are too busy" and you can clearly see I'm fucking falling around due to illness is just a shit move.
"no doctors note, no time off". Yeah. You don't give me time to go to the doctor.
So you know what I did? I fucking went to the doctor now. Said I'm sick as a dog. Gave me a few days off too.
I should have asked him to prescribe my director a butternut sized suppository that cures all "I'm a shithead" ailments.
Time to try and turn my phone off for a few days (won't work. "oh no! We hired fuck twits who can't do their job, and now our skilled dev is sick" director "FUCKING PHONE HIM" this shit really happens.).
Excuse my grammar, my spelling, and possibly my punication. Time to sleep after 65 hours.4 -
Pretty much right now. I'm seething, just thinking about going to work in a few short hours.
I work for a company that doesn't respect me. A fucking simpleton designer who can do no wrong has changed everything about a project that I'm responsible for, hundreds of times. She gets out a ruler (yes, really), measures stuff against her little mockups (that are also prone to changing without notice), and screams when things don't precisely match her "designs" on every single device she can get her goddamned hands on. She's changed everything except the deadline. I have gotten none of the recognition and all of the blame, and I'm completely over it. This is nothing new. In addition to being a dev team of one, I also found out that I'm the third such person in my company's employ in the last two years, and I've worked here for one.
The final straw was when I was given a schedule for the next project, which I had not been consulted on. It was a printout of an email. Copied in the email was the designer, my boss, and an intern. A FUCKING GOD DAMNED HOURLY INTERN.
Fast forward one week.
I'm in third stage interviews with half a dozen companies right now, second stage interviews with at least that many. When I do get another job, I was originally going to give notice, but I think now I'll just give my boss a printout of an email to the interns and walk out.
Shove the internet up your ass, you fucking fucks2 -
Running a fucking conda environment on windows (an update environment from the previous one that I normally use) gets to be a fucking pain in the fucking ass for no fucking reason.
First: Generate a new conda environment, for FUCKING SHITS AND GIGGLES, DO NOT SPECIFY THE PYTHON VERSION, just to see compatibility, this was an experiment, expected to fail.
Install tensorflow on said environment: It does not fucking work, not detecting cuda, the only requirement? To have the cuda dependencies installed, modified, and inside of the system path, check done, it works on 4 other fucking environments, so why not this one.
Still doesn't work, google around and found some thread on github (the errors) that has a way to fix it, do it that way, fucking magic, shit is fixed.
Very well, tensorflow is installed and detecting cuda, no biggie. HAD TO SWITCH TO PYHTHON 3,8 BECAUSE 3.9 WAS GIVING ISSUES FOR SOME UNKNOWN FUCKING REASON
Ok no problem, done.
Install jupyter lab, for which the first in all other 4 environments it works. Guess what a fuckload of errors upon executing the import of tensorflow. They go on a loop that does not fucking end.
The error: imPoRT eRrOr thE Dll waS noT loAdeD
Ok, fucking which one? who fucking knows.
I FUCKING HATE that the main language for this fucking bullshit is python. I guess the benefits of the repl, I do, but the python repl is fucking HORSESHIT compared to the one you get on: Lisp, Ruby and fucking even NODE in which error messages are still more fucking intelligent than those of fucking bullshit ass Python.
Personally? I am betting on Julia devising a smarter environment, it is a better language already, on a second note: If you are worried about A.I taking your job, don't, it requires a team of fucktards working around common basic system administration tasks to get this bullshit running in the first place.
My dream? Julia or Scala (fuck you) for a primary language in machine learning and AI, in which entire environments, with aaaaaaaaaall of the required dlls and dependencies can be downloaded and installed upon can just fucking run. A single directory structure in which shit just fucking works (reason why I like live environments like Smalltalk, but fuck you on that too) and just run your projects from there, without setting a bunch of bullshit from environment variables, cuda dlls installation phases and what not. Something that JUST FUCKING WORKS.
I.....fucking.....HATE the level of system administration required to run fucking anything nowadays, the reason why we had to create shit like devops jobs, for the sad fuckers that have to figure out environment configurations on a box just to run software.
Fuck me man development turned to shit, this is why go mod, node npm, php composer strict folder structure pipelines were created. Bitch all you want about npm, but if I can create a node_modules setting with all of the required dlls to run a project, even if this bitch weights 2.5GB for a project structure you bet your fucking ass that I would.
"YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING" YES I FUCKING DO and I will get this bullshit fixed, I will get it running just like I did the other 4 environments that I fucking use, for different versions of cuda and python and the dependency circle jerk BULLSHIT that I have to manage. But this "follow the guide and it will work, except when it does not and you are looking into obscure github errors" bullshit just takes away from valuable project time when you have a small dedicated group of developers and no sys admin or devops mastermind to resort to.
I have successfully deployed:
Java
Golang
Clojure
Python
Node
PHP
VB/C# .NET
C++
Rails
Django
Projects, and every single fucking time (save for .net, that shit just fucking works on a dedicated windows IIS server) the shit will not work with x..nT reasons. It fucking obliterates me how fucking annoying this bullshit is. And the reason why the ENTIRE FUCKING FIELD of computer science and software engineering is so fucking flawed.
But we can't all just run to simple windows bs in which we have documentation for everything. We have to spend countless hours on fucking Linux figuring shit out (fuck you also, I have been using Linux since I was 18, I am 30 now) for which graphical drivers for machine learning, cuda and whatTheFuckNot require all sorts of sys admin gymnasts to be used.
Y'all fucked up a long time ago. Smalltalk provided an all in one, easily rollable back to previous images, easily administered interfaces for this fileFuckery bullshit, and even though the JVM and the .NET environments did their best to hold shit down, and even though we had npm packages pulling the universe inside, or gomod compiling shit into one place NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO we had to do whatever the fuck we wanted to feel l337 and wanted.
Fuck all of you, fuck this field, fuck setting boxes for ML/AI and fuck every single OS in existence2 -
Doing e-learning for a job
One of the examples provided:
"You could be late for work (fail to meet your objective of being on time) because you're hit by a car whilst crossing the road"
Are you fucking kidding me, I think being late to work would be the least of my worries. Fuck corporate bullshit.14 -
Am I the only one that thinks it's extremely fucking stupid that the software engineering industry is simultaneously experiencing a "shortage of talent" and maintaining the same ATS that filters legitimate talent just because the resume doesn't fit keyword specifications?
We see it every day. People with years of experience that should never be allowed to touch important code. People with little to no experience that learn fast and perform well. Fuck years of experience being the only thing some recruiters see.
"We generally don't hire people with less than 3 years experience" shut your fucking mouth. Ridiculous. You hire people out of college, don't lie to my face.
Oh and don't even get me started on how many people fabricate their industry experience and get interviews from it. That's what happens when recruitment patterns fail to catch up to an industry that increasingly trains people better up front, and in shorter time periods, and values skills that ATS doesn't give a shit about.
Crazy idea: make job applications test problem solving competency instead of weeding out quality candidates.
Job searching is frustrating.3 -
No one will understand me but you Devs.
I am a self taught developer who works in a digital marketing agency, when I was learning to code I wanted that the code I will produce will help people and make me happy, the only job i got is in digital marketing agency, because no one in my country will recrute a self taught bald ugly mid thirty fucker, then want them young and fresh, anyway, I proved that I can handle the job, so that I became the only dev in the agency.
the problem is that I reached a that checkpoint where I have to choose a path:
- I learned Node and React but I can't use them in my agency
- I work with wordpress and prestashop but I don't code, I use fucking theme forest templates
the only way to work with MERN is through remote, but I am not a senior yet, I only have to keep learning PHP but I can't advance in my current job since the projects don't require coding, and I feel that my agency will close the dev department because they put me in the designers office.
I don't want to reach 40 with nothing in my portfolio but shitty theme forest template rape, the stress from my current situation is killing me, I can't even start working on my portfolio website and blog because I can't think straight, my mind jump from "today I will build an api" to "no I need to build a custom wordpress theme" each 3 minutes, I don't sleep, the futur is dark, I am afraid that if I focus on wordpress and shit I will miss working in interesting projects, and if I focus on MERN I will never gain experience localy to become a full remote later.
many will agree with me that PHP is shitty but gets the work done, and I hate PHP because of prestashop, and we only live once, the only other job I found require wordpress and fucking prestashop, imagine living a live doing something you don't like, then die regretting every decision you make.
I might sound crazy for you, but I don't have many friends and I am an introvert working with designers and community managers ... so this is the only place I can write what I want.
if you reached here, I thank you for your time4 -
So i was bitching about some cron task few days before
and guess the issue
Fucking Client just shut down the server by himself for night and cron job scheduled for night time :(
I fucking waste 2-3 days to debug the function whats wrong with them until one day I checked server is closed at night :(2 -
Managed to land 2 interviews:
The first one was for a startup that was looking for a react programmer (I've never used react before).
The later was a php job at a big company. They told me they used cakephp which is a framework I had not used before either.
Still, I'm more familiar with php than react so I felt more confident with the second interview. However, I felt there was a lot of good chemistry going on in the first interview.
The interviewer was incredibly nice (he was the lead dev, not an HR person as opposed to the second interviewer)
He gave me a small react test to be completed within a week. I barely managed to do it in time but I felt good about the solution.
Just as I was sending it, I get a call from the second interviewer saying I landed the php job.
I wasn't sure if my novice react skills would be impressive enough to secure me the react job (and I really needed a job) so I accepted.
After explaining everything to the guy who was interviewing me for the react job, he understood and was kind enough to schedule a code review where he walked through my novice code explaining what could be improved, helping me learn more in the process.
I regret not accepting the react position. The PHP they got me working with is fucking PHP5 with Cake2 :/
Don't get me wrong, I like the salary and the people are nice but the tech stack they're using (lacking source control by the way!), as well as all the lengthy meetings are soul-draining.6 -
There are a lot... I am going to pick the interview dialogue (incl. test) with the government.
Following situation:
-5 recruiters
-3 candidates (including me) who have all passed an online test that did last for 3 hours
The online test was for the government to see how every candidate is good at math, English, situation adaptation, historical questions, a little bit of techy questions like "What does fps stand for?" and basic questions like that.
Even tho I did apply for a job as a software developer, there was not a single fucking question about programming. I shit you not. Anyways...
After everyone did introduce themselves. I was given the following question by one of the recruiters:"How do you think will the regular work look like to you, if you were to schedule it? We will be starting with you, <myName>"
Me:"Since this is hopefully going to be my first job in software development, I can only assume it for now. Based on my knowledge about this specific topic that I have made by reading other software developers' work experiences in form of textual content, I guess that I am going to do this [...] and that [...]. Oh and after this comes the planning phase (I had mentioned the sprints and agile "frameworks") and meetings of how the projects are doing so far.
After this comes the phase of sitting down and getting to work on the project I am assigned to.
At the end comes the "see you tomorrow, xyz" phase and everyone leaves."
Somebody else from the 5 recruiters:"I am sorry to interrupt you right here, but we are not offering you a dev job. It rather is a mixture of dev and sysadmin. You will be working most of the time fixing someone's problem with their PC and not sitting in a dark and empty corner of a warm room."
This was such a disrespect that I could not give an answer to. I was deeply shocked. Developers need more respect. Most of the fucking things you use, are created by developers, you asshole.
"We will be very happy, if you can call us by tomorrow to let us now if you are still interested."
Me does not even bother anymore and blacklists that government as a "trust me. You do not want to work there" type of job offering place.
Since I did not sign any NDA. It is the government of Germany.
PS: I did apply for a *dev* job. But somehow they did decide to create a new job and assign me to it. That is not professional.5 -
Most Incompetent co-worker. It was me during my first job. Not humble bragging or some shit. I was straight out fucking incompetent during my first job.
Hear me out.
I graduated my diploma course specialising in networks(from computer to cellular/telecom networks) but I did a few programming courses and my internship was at a lab - did iOT stuffs with raspi and arduinos. I am a A+ student so was giving priority to choose a better internship place. Fun time. So I fell in love with programming. As soon as i graduated I applied for a Java job. Got a job at a domain name reseller/hosting company using java EE. Remember my programming = very basic/OOP concepts/basic SQL knowledge. That's it.
I am that little childish fucker who thought he knew everything and I kept interrupting my coworkers with stupid questions.
Same time, I was under the darkest moments of my life with some family drama/tension headaches.
2 months into the job, one coworker really got pissed off with my interruptions and bluntly told me "*my name,you are stupid aren't you"
The manager was a really nice guy. I will forever thanks him for his advices. He knew I was struggling with family shits and gave me another 3 months probation period to redeem myself. But I gave up. That was back in 2015.
It was a great place I fucked it up. But I learnt precious life lessons. I was young,stupid and didn't know how to handle stress.
I thanks myself for not quitting programming after that experience.2 -
Fucking hate my job 😡
I joined as nodejs dev at a mnc 3months ago involved in banking software in which i dont have any domain knowledge.. first 10 days I was told to go through fucking udemy nodejs and graphql tutorial (wtf) which i already have experience with before joining.. after that my reporting manager gives me task to resolve fields and gave me shitty jira story link to read.. that shit story link had no explanation about the fields and what the database it is, then she says to use some shitty sdk which is built internally by shiity devloper which had no documentation and have to follow other module which was again written by that sr. Dev... They hav fucked up the graphql and nodejs and entire stack and also till date no one has ever given any explanation about the domain and the fields and database schema.. this manager refuses to share knowledge about the domain now how the fuck i resolve the graphql schema which was again written by non technical b.a.. all they have used is latest technology in a shitty way with no standards to to follow .. no dataloading no caching no batching.. use shitty sdk which does not give access to dbconn and fucking tightly coupling expressjs which when i start consumes crazy 400Mb of memory .. these fucking seniors devs + the fucking b.a having 12+. Yrs exp each have fucked the entire codebase... Each day killing my passion for app development.. fuckkk ... Dunno what to do now5 -
ARGH the next person to tell me how X is the best toolchain is getting their fucking head cut off! Holy fucking shit, this is even more annoying than the whole IDE debate. At least with IDEs everyone has a favourite one and they hate others accordingly, with build toolchains there's always a huge group of fucktards sucking each other's dick by adding new features, and they're always too busy wanking their sparkling features for small projects to realise how fucking inefficient their polished dings and dongs are for any bigger job.
For the millionth time, no, we're not switching to this popular toolchain just because it gave you a blowjob with your pet project (although that would indeed be a tempting offer), so stop talking how fast and flexible it is. Until you can show how it compiles a 500 MB project faster than our current setup, I don't give a shit how many people jerk on that nookie.3 -
Liferay. Fucking Liferay.
I'm mostly C#, Java Dev with only a year of experience and as Kruger-Dunning effect says, I thought I'm not that bad. At the beginning of my job I've got tasked with creating an portlet for Liferay CMS which is written in Java. Can't be that bad, right? WRONG.
Liferay is real shit. Not only there is little to none community life but also documentation and tutorials are outdated! Many methods are doing the same functionality but are in different packages. JSP make coding a big fucking mess if you won't make shit ton of classes to clean it up. Also it has this incredible ability to crash whole portlet after a small change in classes structure.
I have to mention that no one could help me because company that I'm working for is a rather small one and there's no other Java developer beside me. This also means that it's hard to really get gut when no one is oversying my progress.
Also I really dislike web development. And Liferay made it even worse. I hope it will burn in hell.1 -
At my job in the past week there have been at least one 1 hour-long meeting every day with today hitting the record with 3 meetings.
This is fucking insane. I signed to a developer job, not a guy-sittimg-and-listening job.2 -
Yes this is a rant about parents and work but I don't care!
So looks like my parents are going to kick me out because I don't have a full time job and according to them, I'm not looking...
I currently work in retail and have for the past 5 years and started working day 1 that I could have, been applying for IT positions when I'm one of the highest qualified on my area but get turned down so they can pay a teenager half the amount, apply for big retail chains that are "always hiring" like Coles, woolies and Kmart, get turned fucking down.
Don't qualify for government assistance as I'm just out of the earnings bracket, can't afford my own places, don't have my licence yet so I'm fucked...
But hey, atleast my parents will be rid of me and just dis-own me like my middle brother until I have a kid or they need tech support.
Why is getting work so fucking hard when you're qualified, I'm willing to even be a call centre guy but as soon as job possibilities come up I get fucked over time and time again -,-2 -
So I'm starting a job at a large company in the early part of next year... it's a total mindfuck because the salary is a m a s s i v e bump up and for the first time I'm experiencing imposter syndrome. I never really fully grasped the feeling that a lot of people here described until after that final interview and an offer was extended. I'm stoked AF to start and it's going to be a huge learning experience while working there.
The company wants me and my family to relocate to another state (US) and it's got my stomach doing somersalts.
It's especially painful because the current place I'm working is amazing; the people are great, the work is solid but fairly low pressure, and there's lateral freedom to work on improving the systems and infrastructure whenever there is free time. And I know that the new gig is going to have certain expectations that need to be met or my head could be on the chopping block.
High risk, high reward I guess 😅
My anxiety is raw dogging my brain and it fucking sucks, but my wife has been doing a great job keeping me level headed and thinking logically about the future and growth this opportunity brings with it.
I'm not trying to gloat or brag, just really needed a place to share some of this since I'm freaking out and don't feel like I have enough experience/skills to take on this job. Those interviews left me worn out. 4 rounds and the final interview was 5 hours long all in one day. 😫2 -
I finally heard a retarded question on a job interview. I thought they were just jokes.. I was wrong!
What kind of a question is "how would your friends describe you?"..
They'd say I'm fucking awesome, did you expect a different answer?
Or when I gave them a referral, my previous boss, and they asked me what would he say about me.. well fuck me sideways, I have no idea.
And one of the last ones, "tell us your three top qualities that would make us hire you". What kind of information does such a question even give them? Are they testing me how well I can lie? Because I can't, and others that can lie will give a better answer, regardless of the reality.
And they were even taking notes after these questions.
Other than that, nice company. I really want to start working there soon.5 -
You know that figurative bonner you have when working on new/exciting projects?
I used to be like that here...
Today I realized that I lost it a long time ago...
That sucks hard, every little script I do on the side I feel excited , every functionality I develop on the job is a fucking mirror of some other shit that no one uses on another mirror project that brings nothing new to the table.5 -
!dev
Remember this one?
https://devrant.com/rants/2148954/...
Yesterday I got promoted which is great, I know that I’m appreciated.
The job is really good, I enjoy every day at work..
But...
My darling, my love, my car (I named her Monroe)..
In the Morning i got promoted and in the evening I fucking blew up her engine..
I think it’s the balance in the universe.
I think I never enjoyed any car as much as I enjoyed her.
Her smell, her bitchyness, her looks...
I hope she’ll Rest In Peace.
Gotta find something that compares to her now which is gonna be a challenge. I used to drive her every evening and every Friday night, Saturday and Sunday, that’s how I spent my personal time.
Many of you won’t get me I guess.. cars are my hobby, my passion, a very important part of my life. For the last 5 years used to own at least 2 cars at once, now I own 0..😔
No idea what I should do with my free time now, there’s nothing I’m Passioned about besides cars..2 -
God fucking damnit automating a client's "Job applicant form" system is the most boring shit l've ever done.
Get me some damn monkeys to do this
"Oh OK so I just have to take this form and turn it into HTML. Oh shit, 25 check box's, let's just copy paste this shit in over and over. Oh damn, forgot I have to change the name and value fields for each one. God damnit this is boring, I guess I have to"
Fucking hell it's annoying work, Boring, easy, no thought needed. Ended up turning this task into a drinking game. Every time the word "Management" came up, I took a shot. Got me pretty fucked up.
Client emails back; "Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, we have these 3 other forms we want you to automate".
Well fuck at this point I feel like more of an alcoholic than a developer.5 -
I hate social media because I have to keep it in one way or the other (don't ask)
As such, I have to deal with multiple bullshit that I read from people.
The trust fund baby with a daddy selected job posting images on him on Cancun "lIfe Is To Be EnjOyeD, go AhEaD trAvEl" <--- bitch I work. I am happy that you enjoy shit but fuck me man have some sense of reality.
Many more shit like that, plus, it is a pandemic fuckhead, chill the fuck out.
The retarded veteran that continues to cry about a football player kneeling on a football match.....even though he was told by a fucking ex Special Forces to take a knee in peaceful protest.
Mexican adults talking about American politics.....dude you live in FUCKING MEXICO your fucking president is a national MEME
the list continues, I hate social media.19 -
Everybody is criticizing Microsoft for leaving too much legacy code in Windows, etc., but let me tell you that I prefer 100% that and have lifetime backward compatibility than having to deal with Google bullshit.
Google sucks ass.
It's one of the most dev unfriendly company on this planet (along with Facebook).
You can't fucking change BASIC stuff in Android SDK every fucking version.
You just can't!
You can't use a system of "PERMISSIONS" each developer has to set in its application and each user has to accept during the installation, that a few versions later become USELESS... because "Hmmm… no, It's not enough, let's make a new privileged permission that makes the old one fucking worthless".
YOU FUCKING, TOXIC, BASTARDS.
It's my app, my code, my device, my fucking conditions. If I want to install viruses on my device, I should be able to do it.
I shouldn't have to call fucking Sundar fucking Pichai fucking CEO of fucking GOOGLE.
USERS != BABIES.
DEVS != CRIMINALS
We are the reason you have a fucking job, fucking food on your fucking table.
I want a fucking GOD_MODE permission in the next SDK, assholes!
You can't REMOVE fucking "Android.OS.getSerial()" making it only for system apps.
It's not sensible data… and if It's in your opinion, you've already created a "android.permission.READ_PHONE_STATE", so what else do you want, fucking asshole?
Right, you want to introduce "android.permission.READ_PRIVILIGED_PHONE_STATE" to make obsolete the other one, son of a bitch!
I don't fucking use you're garbage Google Play Store, no worries! I won't upload my app on your servers, bitch!
They've created a monopoly in the industrial space (PDAs) and they keep making fucking wrong decisions every single year.
My job is already stressful, why you can't just stop making it worse? fml8 -
Made a LinkedIn profile for the first time since like 2013.
I haven’t put current job on there, only been here a month and if I absolutely have to have to I’ll just mention working here for a month but it wasn’t a good match in an interview.
Start getting the expected recruiter messages once I finished the profile.
One of them is a recruiter at current job.
Fucking lol.3 -
I'm an embedded devices dev. As part of my job I take off the shelf devices and write libraries so that our JavaScript team can interface with them. If I have to deal with one more custom implementation of a standard protocol I'm going to freak the fuck out. Like fuck there are only 5 or so major communication protocols at the hardware level there is no fucking reason to reinvent some shittier protocol over a well documented, widely used protocol that has been around for 30 years. (Modbus for anyone who cares)2
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Not dev, but IT...
Just found out that one section of my place of work still uses floppy disks. No I’m not fucking kidding. The other sad part? We still have the outdated computers to read them. 😩😂
Please, send help or a job application...5 -
Fuck, I only need to hire ONE fullstack developer who fucking knows what he's talking about and not trying to weasel their way into this job. I tell them that there are no annoying managers, no KPI, no bullshit, I thought this is kinda valuable, but no
How hard can it be?25 -
Im now working as a fulltime dev for 3 years. I do programming since im 9 and now that I collected some experience, I have to to say, its horrible. Seriously. What the fuck is wrong with german internship companys? Letting me do 3 years of FUCKING CRYSTAL REPORTS. IN A DEVELOPMENT TEAM THAT CONSISTS OF A TEAM LEAD THAT ACTUALLY HAS TO LEARN SHIT LIKE PROPER OOP AND ASYNC/AWAIT FROM ME. THEY EVEN ASKED ME IF I CAN DROP OF MY HOBBY PROJECTS TO WORK ON SAMPLES THAT THEY CAN LEARN FROM! NO! FUCK! JUST BECAUSE THESE DOUCHBAGS ARE TOO LAZY TO FUCKING LEARN TECHNOLOGY THEY SHOULD BE PASSIONATE ABOUT IN THEIR FREE TIME, IM NOT MAKING IT MY JOB TO FREAKING SHOW THEM THAT HAVING A STATIC CLASS CONTAINING ALL MODELS EVER EXISTED IN THE APP IS A BAD THING! SERIOUSLY, THERES ONLY ONE INSTANCE OF EVERY MODEL WE HAVE! AND THEN THEY BLAME SQL SERVER FOR RACE CONDITIONS WHEN TRYING ASYNC!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!! AND STILL, IF I TELL THEM WHATS WRONG, IM AN IDIOT BECAUSE IM A JUNIOR! Please tell me that i didnt waste 10 years of my life dedicating to such bullshit. Will that change? Is it company specific?9
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Being a developer is a fucking struggle and no one fucking understands it.
Trying to keep up with new technologies and working with Project Managers that wants stuff to be delivered in no time is what makes you regret your career sometimes..
Maaan I FUCKING HATE THIS JOB!!!8 -
I don't know if this is a problem only in Belgium or also in other countries but while I love Bluetooth for audio playback (headsets, speakers and everything) despite being extremely convoluted as a protocol.. FUCK Bluetooth keyboards.
Several of them I've tried. Several of them, from various brands. Pairing, setting the Belgian keyboard layout (which on that shitty Android 7.0 tablet that I want to use the fucking things with apparently has to be done *every fucking time you connect*, because reasons) all well. Except half the keys don't fucking map properly. A keymap, it doesn't get easier than that! How hard is it to make buttons map to the right keys!? They're literally fucking push buttons on a matrix! Seeing which points in the circuit make contact and sending that off to wherever it needs to go!
And to put the icing on the cake? USB keyboards with the same fucking layout settings work without any problems. So it's extremely likely that it's something in those shitty keyboards' controllers or Bluetooth going full rart on all of them.
Of course, Bluetooth being as convoluted as it is, manufacturers just copy each others' implementations of it if they can.. so there's that.
Can really nobody make a product halfway decent anymore before putting it on the market!?
Another one bites the dust.. JUNK!!! Every single goddamn one of them!1 -
Sorry to keep whining about my stupid fucking job, but y'all, I think I'm nearing my limit.
There's some good...I am pretty much free to resolve issues any way I want to, as the only other person in the company who "codes" only knows one old ass language that doesn't apply to 90% of the rest of the tech stack at all, and some SQL - all of that to say, we may disagree, but ultimately, these matters are always deferred to me at the end of the day, insofar as the actual implementation goes (which is to say I am not micromanaged). At least as far as non-visuals are concerned, because those of course, are the most important things. Button colors and shit, woo hoo**. That's what we should focus on as we're bringing in potentially millions of dollars per month - the god damn button color and collapsible accordions based on data type over the shit ass DB performance bottleneck, the lack of redundancy or backups (aside from the one I made soon after I started -- literally saved everyone today because of that. My thanks? None, and more bullshit tasks) or the 300GB+ spaghetti code nightmare that is the literal circulatory system of the FUCKING COMPANY. Hundreds of people depend on it for their livelihoods, and those of their families, but fuck me in the face, right? I'm just a god damn nerd who has worked for the federal government, a handful of fortune 500's, a couple of fortune 100's, some startups, etc. But the fuck do I know about the lifecycle of companies?
I could continue ranting, but what's the point? I've got a nice little adage that I've started to live by, and y'all might appreciate it: "If everything is a priority/is important, nothing is". These folks just don't fucking get it. I'm torn because, on the one hand, they waste my time and kinda underpay me, in addition to forcing me to be onsite for 50 hours a week. They don't listen to me, couldn't give a flying shit about my experientially based opinions. I'm just a fucking chimp with a typewriter, there to take commands like a fucking waiter. But there's a lot of job security, assuming I don't fucking snap one day, and the job market for devs (I'm sure I don't need to tell you) is hostile atm. I'm also drinking far more than usual, and I really need to do something about that. It's only wednesday - I think...not 100% on that truth be told, and I logged my fourth trip to the liquor store this week already.
**Dear backenders - don't ever learn front end, or if you do, just lie about it to avoid being designated full stack. It's not worth it.4 -
Windows FUCK you, you had one job, one fucking job to update it and you ruined it.
I trusted you even though everybody said don't.
I didnt remove you i dual booted you when everybody said FUCK windows.
I had my data.
I had games.
And you FUCKING ruined it.
And listen:
FUCK WINDOWS. I am switching to linux!17 -
I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.
And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.
Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.
Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.
No, neither of those broke me.
The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...
WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS
I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL
IS IT TO MUCH ?????
FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS
FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.
AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS
AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??
GO TO HELL MICROSOFT
I WANT MY LINUX BACK7 -
if(!dev_related && is_life_related) ReadOn();
So today I received 4 job rejections... 4 in one day...
That raises my rejection tally for just this year 48, I just want a fucking job! Even got confirmation that 3 of the 4 rejections were because I only have 2 prior job locations... THATS THE FUCKING PROBLEM!
You complain about me not having prior jobs so you don't let me have a chance at other jobs...
No fucking wonder unemployment is a thing -.-4 -
So here goes my first rant...
I was looking for a job as a software developer when I saw one nice company hiring.
I apply to them via their form online. Then they invite me to come to their event during which they will explain everything in details.
I go there (despite the time of the event being uncomfortable for me) and listen to them for a while. Basically, they say they will send the test task to all applicants and see how it goes.
Later same day they email me saying they didn't get my CV via their form and they need me to resend it so they can send the test task. Alright, no big deal, done.
Now today they email me saying "sorry, motherfucker, better luck next time".
What the actual fuck? I spend my fucking time to go to some shitty event saying a test task will decide everything to not even get one.
So, naturally, I go and re-check my email: I definitely did send them my CV;
seems like they ignored the email and eliminated me from the application process for not having my CV, fuckers.
If they will ever in the future invite me to an interview/offer me a job there, I won't take for fucking triple pay.
Thanks for reading and helping me vent my anger, have a nice day:)2 -
Just now... Got a job to create patch files for a couple of jars, which may or may not have varying class files. In total, I have to decompile, check, add and synchronize about 30 class files in 6 jars with a new functionality (that I didn't write). 🙂
FUCK PRODUCTION! WHY CANT YOU MAINTAIN ONE MOTHERFUCKING JAR?
OH? YOU'RE SUPERSTITIOUS THAT ONE TINY, ANT-SHIT SIZED CHANGE IN ONE SIMPLE FUNCTIONALITY WILL FUCK UP *OUR* PRODUCT?
FUCK MANAGEMENT! YOU DON'T HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOUR *OWN* PRODUCT!
OH? CUSTOMER COMES FIRST? HAVE THE BALLS TO DEFEND YOUR OWN FUCKING SELF AND PRODUCT TO THE CLIENT OR THEY'RE GONNA MAKE YOU YOUR BITCH AND TIE A GAGBALL DIPPED IN HOT SAUCE AROUND YOUR MOUTH! HOW.. THE FUCK.. DID YOU MISS THAT LOGIC??????
Best part, they want it by tomorrow, and they don't wanna test it. Guess who's gonna get slaughtered after a week? ME! 🙂5 -
This was about two years ago, and is so fucking simple. But it's because I fucked up something so goddamn simple that I'll never be able to forget.
One of the stupidest fucking things I've done?
Went into the GNOME Disks utility trying to wipe a SanDisk Cruzer USB drive. BAM! There goes the entirety of my /dev/sda disk! Oh, and you know all partitions on that disk?? Gone!! Nothing I could do.
I don't know which pisses me off about myself more: The fact that Linux has more complicated tools that do the same exact job but make me think about what the actual fuck I'm doing thus preventing fuckups, or the fact that I was too fucking lazy to use them and decided to go with the dirt simple option and still managed to fuck myself over in the end...
Lesson for you kids that haven't fucked yourselves over in a way this dumb yet: ALWAYS have that backup installer USB somewhere. ALWAYS. -
Dear mother fucking Hiring Managers,
Just because you are mother fucking fortunate, have a mother fucking proper job , a mother fucking high pay , have mother fucking parents care for you, does not mother fucking mean that you can mother fucking mock those mother fucking not as fortunate as you mother fucking arse!
Some of us carrying family, surviving, we learn how to code without a degree. Just because I have to motherfucking care for my family and pay off the mother fucking loan , it doesnt mean I am mother fucking unless. You mother fucking mother fuckers go fuck your mother fucking mother fuckers is the mother fucking mother fuckers' mothers.
Where's the empathy or politeness? You fucking ridicule people's bad luck, soon your mother fucking arsehole will be one , you bloody mother fuckers!6 -
GIVE ME AN EXAMPLE OF A SINGLE FUCKING JOB REPLACED BY AI
JUST ONE
fucking rubes, touching around on their stupid iphone and laptop, pretty lights, colors, and sounds
"wow AI the future"
that's what most of reddit is to me
shut the fuck up30 -
Google search can get fucked in the ass.
Greedy fucking bastards deceptively including ads as normal results.
It used to be just one, but I've seen crazy shit, like 4 ads in one search results. FOUR.
And it's not just the ads. It's all the fucking litter that they put above the results.
I'm talking about all this fucking Google Maps and web cards bullshit.
It takes too much goddamned space, and most of the times I DO NOT GIVE SHITS ABOUT THEM.
And if you want to hide that shit, guess what, you gotta go into the settings. How about you include a fucking corner X that I can click so I can hide immediately hide that shit when I want to?
Now, let's analyze the unholy mess that the image I included is:
The search I did is a simple "html form". Notice that the fucking Adblock is turned ON, yet I still get a "chameleon" ad.
The first real result is from w3schools that also expands on two also hideous things: sitelinks.
Sitelinks are nothing more than spacehogs that I very very rarely click. They look fancy, but they just add CLUTTER.
What are search result n 2 and 3? w3fools again. And I shit you not the next 2 results to those are also w3schools again. So 5 w3fucks links TOTAL.
Wow, google, I'm fucking mindblown, excellent fucking job for a trillion dollar corporation.
Get fucked in the ass.12 -
For the love of Jeebus and all his holyness!!
These fuckers, that I've been studying with for the last semester need to get there shit together!
It's one thing that they want to discuss every single thing and NOT come to a different conclusion after a couple of hours....
BUT I fucking draw the fucking line in the dirt, when you shit eating wimps "forget" to format your code and do the worst half-assed job I have ever seen!
Why the fuck would you only indent half of the lines, without any sort of system?!?
And what is this? A huge fucking bunch of random spaces and tabs at the end of a line? Jeebus, save me! -
Hey this is the first time i post here.
I just started working part-time for this company last week. What i have to do is to change some windows from Win32 to WPF. As i was reading the legacy code i just had to sigh man. They have like 100 projects in a single solution, from C++ to C#, everything acctached to each other, with almost NO comments or docs. Wtf man? I don't know how it actually works in the industry (this is my first dev job) but when you write fucking 20 classes with each one contains bunch of attributes, methods, properties, you can't just leave all the code's semantics in their names. And by the way the app is so fucking ugly i bet they have appointed part-time developers as UX engineers... Even i have little knowledge about UX/UI, i just can't bear with this kind of ugly and confusing and unintuitive production with a cost of a good photo editting software.
Ok there may be much more to rant in the future but let me try through this and tell you more. Have a good day. :)5 -
Maybe if you started actually fucking backing up your bullshit MONTHS ago when I told you your system was dying, or replaced it when I told you it was failing, you wouldn't have lost 6 fucking months worth of fucking work when it finally died today.
I setup a file backup system since you never had one, I gave you detailed instructions a fucking 40 year adult she be able to follow, I even offered to walk you through the process the first time after I set it up.
It shouldn't be my fucking problem you're too fucking stupid to listen to the tech person YOU fucking hired and lost data.
I was hired as a damn programmer, setting up the server wasn't in my job description, backing up emails because you refuse to pay for more GMail storage isn't in my job description, fucking 70% of what I've done this past fucking year working for you isn't in my job description.
Fucking hell, I'm fucking glad I'm working on leaving. The fucking employee shouldn't fucking care more than the damn owner. This place is not going to grow, and most of your employees are working on applying elsewhere because of your short-sightedness and petty bullshit drama you bring everywhere, everyday.3 -
Another one of my job recruiter ranting posts
I couldn't add all of it in but they want a senior developer with 4 years of experience (which is I don't believe is senior worthy) but pay peanuts ($25 -$35, is not a lot in New Zealand)
I don't understand how companies can expect someone to be able to be in charge of all their development and expect to pay absolutely nothing, no wonder there are more companies that want to be contracted for work, then being tied down
Oh yeah and the recruiter couldn't even be bothered typing senior mobile developer, they just typed software developer.. fucking lazy
What a fucking joke...2 -
So...
I'm doing an internship on the best company ever....
Boss is so awesome he waited half a year so I could do the internship... Cause Corona and fucking stupid Public workers (half my class didn't finish... Like... It's a pandemic and lets not facilitate, it's just one year of their life's)
Workers are great... Environment is so good that yesterday one coworker went to talk to the boss and me and the other did his job on his back... So we could all leave in time.
And I probably won't stay after... Because thers not enough work to hire me....
Fuck Corona. -
Every website with a newsletter that you can't unsubscribe with just one click, but instead you have to log in, and go to settings, and select the fucking unsubscribe option, should be BANNED from internet!
In most cases this kind of website is unusable with a smartphone, or at least only the settings page is not responsive, to make it more difficult to fucking unsubuscribe.
I'm trying to unsubscribe from a fucking website since 2016, but every time I open the email with my smartphone it's just impossible to do it, and I forgot every time to do it when I'm using a PC.
Now, after a few months I received this fucking SPAM when I was using my PC, but I forgot my password, and the recovery password option just doesn't work, so I still can't do it!
If you're one of these fucking developers, there is a special place for you in hell.
Even if the decision to make it so fucking dumb isn't yours, you are still accomplice, because you should have leave this fucking job.1 -
3 months to get married:
* gets another client, everything good
2 month to get married:
* lose previous client, all good, the previous client didn't pay as much as the current one
1 month to get married:
* previous client don't wanna pay for the previous month
* lost the second client
Great job 👍 debts + no fucking job6 -
Well today I feel like shit so I called in sick. Found out the lead developer called in sick as well.
The thing is, there was something really important to be done today that he fucking new that if he was not to be there I was going to get shit from everyone. He is going through some shit right now and I get it, so I would normally cut him some slack.
But fuck man, at some point you got to man the fuck up and deal with your job, if anything do it for your fucking coworkers/friends. He fucking new that I was going to get a fuckload of bullshit over something that he takes care of.
Nevermind that there are only 2 fucking developers for the entire fucking campus(2 campuses actually) and we were told last friday that we were needed. Normally, one would put up with the bullshit and make a presence, but that one of us is always me. Today I said fuck it, its too cold, don't feel good and I don't want to take my daughter to the daycare.
Today I sit at home, go over my OS books, play Skyward Sword with my daughter, watch movies with her and I don't think about work for one second.
On another note, the reason why I need to go through my OS books is that a good portion of my masters degree(which I am to start on August) covers OS development, it seems that the entire curriculum will be C/C++ galore which makes me FUCKING STOKED! finally a break form web development that I can probably use to get me out of web development professionally as well.9 -
I really want to stress that we should add the ticket for adding the missing test cases in *this* sprint and not postpone it any further.
-- "Isn't there something more important to be added instead?"
There. ALWAYS. Is. Something. MORE. Important. The real problem was that we implement the test cases in the past to begin violating our definition of done. We have to fix and one point and we have to own that decision as nobody else will care about passing tests and test coverage. It's our job to care for that.
Yes, we can instead focus on all the other high-priorities task that should have been done yesterday, yet that won't change the fact that large part our codebase will remain an untested messy blackbox just asking for weird bugs and wild goosechases in the future.
Don't hide behind "high priority tasks". A job is done when it is fucking done and tests are part of that. Hurrying from one important task to the next will just mean we'll never do it. There is no better time than right now.
If code coverage got left behind in the past, then we'll have to suck it up in order to fix it as soon as possible, otherwise we'll just suck forever.rant workflow priorities something more important agile own your shit developer sprint planning sprint testing test1 -
Holy shit seriously: Fuck MSOffice. Fuck it right in the eyehole.
As desktop software, it's just brutally terrible. On my work mac, it's just sweaty garbage. The latest insult is that on the most recent update, msword stole the default file association from preview.
Libre isn't terrific, but at least it's closed when you close it. For that reason alone, it's orgasmic by comparison.
Because there's justice in the world, my job is not a document-centered one, so I have no real use at all for an office app, let alone the specific macros and formulae that the msoffice versions of these apps provide, so I couldn't give less of a shit about losing functionality.
The headline and main thrust of this rant is "fuck msoffice so hard that it dies of eye-fucking." -
Ok I know there have been a lot of similar rants to this one, but now I have to write one by myself!
Fuck freelancer.com or whatever that shit is called. I once started using it when I was in school because I thought it was a convenient way to earn money on the side without fixed work times, so I could adjust to how much time I have. But soon I realized that wouldn't happen. It is easy for me to make a website, I have written some css templates from scratch and can apply them, but when will these cocksucking assholes learn that $25 for a website is not only a joke, but a fucking insult? Or a logo for 4? In his video on fiverr, pewdiepie has a point on the thing where he said that you can shit out a logo in 2min and make an easy 4 to 5 bucks, but I like doing things more properly and I bet those fuckers will give you shit for not designing the perfect logo. I once accepted a job where I ended up busting my ass 3 days log for $100 and I thought that was the normal mess at the beginning, before you have former customers rate your profile, but I got perfect ratings and still didn't get or even find any proper jobs. Most are complete shit, like write a fucking book for me or design a fucking Website or pull a logo out of your ass, but some projects are just rediculous. I once saw a project where they wanted some engineer to do the layout for the pipes in a huge processing plant. Yeah, because engineers are so poor and unemployed, even when they are entrepreneurs they dont go to those shity sites. Since I am actually qualified for such a job, I applied just to see if I could land a job that is actually not shitty, but of course it turned out the person had no idea what he was talking about. It is basically a platform where people can pay you in exposure. And the absolutely fucking worst thing about it is that they get away with it. There are always a ton of people, mostly from countries where cost of life is significantly lower, who flood the freelance market with cheap, presumably horrible logos, mobile apps, websites, texts and apparently pipeline layouts. I haven't found a similar platform but where there are only high quality biddings. But that is something that I would love to use.
Sorry for long rant, no potato.1 -
I got the job offer XD it's not a big pay increase from what I was making before, but honestly I'd have taken a pay cut to get out of my current fucking job. Hell, I was one more overly dramatic angry email away from quitting on the spot and going to work as a stock boy in some walmart or something.
-
I sometimes hate my boss (CTO in a medium sized company). Despite that he is a real genius, he changes his mind every fucking day, only because he has 'thought through' a fucking problem which should not be in his concerns. That is my job you fucktard! You haven't been coding for 20 years and now you tell me how to do my job. But then when I need valuable input from you, you SKIP my scheduled MEETINGS FOR WEEKS!
JUST LET ME DO MY JOB, I'M NO IDIOT, BUT YOU GIVE ME THAT FEELING THAT I AM ONE!1 -
I am usually lurking in here since I never really worked as a Software Developer, but until I start going to the University, I thought I might also find myself a job in Software Development.
Well... I don't know where to start.
Someone in here heard of JBoss? Me neither... we're using it... It is a Framework to deploy fortified Java Web Applications. My first day was very chaotic and was dedicated to get this fucking shit to work. I got JBoss 7.5 from my colleagues and started deploying the hello world program...
So. Many. Things. Gone. Wrong...
After like 5 hours of troubleshooting, I had to install/setup a new wrapper with my own batch scripts, install SPECIFICALLY jdk 1.7_17 (anything else won't work) and downgrade JBoss to 7.2.
Yeah that's the first thing. Let's continue about JBoss. Version 7.2 uh? What's the newest one though? Oh it's now known as WildFly... huh... FUCKING HELL, THE NEWEST ONE IS VERSION 10.1??? AND EVEN 10.1 IS 1 YEAR OLD? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCKK AAAAAAHH...
So yeah, after that, without any expectation, I had a look at our codebase. Unit tests huh? I couldn't find a single self written one to test the applications functions... I asked my fellow devs and they told me that "it is too time consuming and we have to focus on new features, the QM Team will just manually test the application". Ever heard this bullshit? A big fat ass codebase with shittons of customers and not a single unit test...
So last but not least, since it is a web application, it also got a site. Y'know RichFaces? The deprecated front end library for Java Webpages? Where you got like 150 Tables per page everyone with a random id everytime you reload? Yeah I don't think I have to explain that to you guys...
So now YOU tell me? Is this a place to be 😂😂😂6 -
What the fuck this fucking shit of an app supposedly went through five rounds of QA and I broke it in 5 minutes? Holy fucking shit How this is the main point of your job. You shitty shits take forever getting this PR to me and now it’s buggier than a haunted house on Halloween?
After this is after wanting to cuss Apple for making me update the os then then xcode then iTunes just to recognize the goddamn development phone. It’s an app built off Cordova it works for like 14 versions of iOS just run the bugger you over priced aluminum chassis dildo riding fruit Fuckers.
Now back to the goddamn cluster fuck I just got delivered. What the goddamn fuck. This level of bullshittery I have not seen before. And apparently Cordova is only partly de-sandboxed? I don’t know for sure because I don’t have time to test it because I’m running the entire technological stack of this company on a junior dev salary!
When you tell me it goes though all this QA and you spend 2 weeks on just QA tickets for fucks sake the first operation I do, the most common fucking operation on the app, the shit we have been building around all this fucking time, should not fucking error out. For fucks sake at least try to get the main fucking thing working. I recognize you did a lot of work and implemented a number of features but what the fuck good are they if I can’t even run them for one fucking time. -
<insert obligatory "long time lurker" statement here>
Started a role about 6 months ago. I'm the sole IT programmer. A bit of the mess I inherited...
- 100+ stand-alone applications/tools (luckily most of them aren't too big).
- No documentation.
- Some applications' only copy of the code exists in production.
- We only have production.
- A single file consisting of 30K+ lines of VB. Little to no comments. The one comment at the top says to keep old code by commenting it out and state what you changed.
- Previous devs didn't like foreign keys.
- No. Fucking. Version. Control. At. All.
- And so much more...
Luckily I was hired due to my experience so I could fix all these problems. Its actually a really great job.7 -
Fucking managers
Now I know why companies with shitty managers don’t grow
Me conversing with my senior as to how to make one of our functions scalable which around 10k devs would be using.
Manager walks in
Manager: how’s function x going
Me: great , will be done soon
Manager: you need to finish it by today
Me: can’t do it , too many sub functions need to be reconfigured( which was his job)
Manager: take *insert some managers asslicker’s name*’s help
Me: okay
We will finish it by today , but everybody know how “robust” the output will be
P.S. I didn’t argue because I’ve done that before and it’s like hitting your head on a wall. If you have read my previous rants, you would know1 -
One thing that @scout taught me is to wear the oxygen mask myself before helping others. Oh she is a sweetheart.
This advice has stuck with me since and slowly & steadily, I am regaining my lost confidence and self love.
Remember, how I was struggling for clarity a couple of months ago? But now, I feel more clear in head.
During the start of the pandemic, I joined a community of corporate normies. I used to live happier until that decision.
That place made me ultra competitive and I subconsciously became a rat trying to win the race. I damaged myself more than I benefited.
I joined at the time of inception. Every core member is a good friend.
Now the fun thing is, they moved to Slack. Many of the core members run the community as admins.
While I don't engage much, but talk to some of them occasionally.
One key area is, running a job board to help people get jobs. And another is mentorship to help the members overcome challenges and grow in their career.
In DMs, literally every core member who is doing this for others is struggling themselves for the same. How fucking ironic!
They seek help and advice from me and vent out their failure frustrations.
Imagine, someone who isn't able to solve their problem, let alone solving it first before helping others, is guiding the community of few thousands to excel in their careers.
Fucking brilliant.
One of the biggest life lessons @scout taught me, wear your oxygen mask first before helping others.48 -
!dev
I just had one of the worst Uber trips ever.
The guy is literally the definition of learning on the job except that the job here is driving people and he doesn't seem to learn shit!!
He opened Google Maps on his phone but never looked at it. I was directing him all the way. He randomly stopped the car completely a few times in the middle of the fucking highway!! He doesn't look at the side mirrors, he actually tilts his head left and right to check for other cars!! I'm glad I finally got to my destination in one piece.
The funny thing is that he was ranting on how bad the road is and how unreliable the GPS is. Is that how we look when we rant about clients? xD3 -
My main mailbox is so full of spam i almost missed a good job test. Wtf
And these mails are so fucking irrelevant loan, cars, bank, life insurances... I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THEM, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU FILLING MY MAILBOX YOU ASSHOLES 😠😠😠
and what's even more weird is how they all have one common sentence in exact formatting : "you can simply WIPE Out your mail from the mailing list".
I feel as if my email has been hacked. Any suggestions?19 -
Normally I don't give a shit when I lost a job opportunity.
But dude, this year everything is bad as fuck. I moved out (yet again) to marry and start a new life.
And as I said a previous Rants, I got a client that just made me lost another client when they started to get shady. For almost a god dam month now, I can't find even a crappy job.
This never happened. I got more than 10 opportunities. A handful of interviews, a few tests and none of them gave me a job.
Now I have one week to get married.
The money I saved whent to all expenses. And now my anxiety is kicking in like it never did in years.
I really don't know what to do and I
can't fucking sleep.10 -
As of today, 12:11 CEST, my days as a student who hates school are over. In one month, i will be a programmer. Feels fucking great.
I may go back in the future, but not right now.
Also, in my new job i have to go to school to, but only 1/3 of the time, and i am getting paid for it.2 -
When you get into good company but end up in bad team. Worst thing to happen. I want to quit. But as of now I don't have any option.
I am way too triggered. Any one tries messing with me anymore at work, I won't be able to stop myself. I am gonna shout....take out all my anger. To hell with you assholez! I don't care if you get me kicked out of team or job! I can't take it anymore. FUCKING IDIOTS!!!!!!7 -
Maybe i should start a new tiktok account and fake saying how im easily hired working a 150k$ a year job in some tech field. Copy paste generic advice. Talk shit about technology i use at my job and help people how to learn it. Etc. And then after a few weeks when people get to know me and trust me i start a course. Or buy me a coffee donation page where i scam money from people who ask me questions about my 150k$/year job.
Seen others do it like Baxate Carter. So i wouldnt be the first one scamming people this way. I have absolutely no morals of "scamming" people for money EXACTLY THE SAME WAY as all of these companies have no morals paying me 500$ a month, or not paying me at all.
companies believe it is MORAL to pay someone $500/month for a FUCKING BACKEND SOFTWARE ENGINEERING JOB WITH A COMPUTER SCIENCE DEGREE. if that is considered as MORAL then i too believe taking money from people to ask me questions about my imaginary 150k$ job as donations is EQUALLY, MORAL.
FUCK YOU.10 -
I fucking hate Microsoft. I fucking HATE it.
I'm supposed to be setting up a Hyper-V VDI environment on a Windows Server 2019 instance. I got all RDS roles installed, but can't see any fucking templates to make a collection out of.
I don't think that the RDVH role got installed correctly because it can't communicate properly with the RDCB, but both roles are installed on the SAME SERVER. I get stupid and unhelpful errors like "Error: 0: ScenarioBasedDeployment: Job Finished for Cmdlet" and when I tried to create a Quick Start Deployment: "QuickVMCollection: Provisioning job failed. Reason: ". Yeah, I typed that correctly. No reason listed.
I reach out on Technet, and I'm told that I need to contact Microsoft Support directly because my problem is beyond the scope of the forum.
I try contacting Microsoft Support, and they want to charge $499 for a one-time helping fee.
My company does not want to spend any money, and we do not already have support services.
I'm supposed to have VDI set up and working by Friday.
Fuck YOU.4 -
I worked with this hack of a backend dev that was too lazy to add a complex(ish) object to our CMS tool. His solution?
One giant-ass text box with the label "put JSON here".
If tech people were using it I wouldn't mind, but our poor content managers have no idea what json is. Plus like... no examples, no schema... they would have to change shit then go look at the website to see if it worked. Fucking asshole.
Plus.. I mean SHIT, MAN! This was in a Node.js tool... if you have the Json parser you could just GENERATE the respective form fields. DO YOUR JOB2 -
We had only one product UX designer in our team.
She quit and I habe accelerated my job hunt.
And when I quit too, the tech team will collapse with both of us gone.
Because then there will be no product manager and no designer, only tech who is arrogant and cocky to even built a simple button to refresh the fucking page.
God bless with this fucking tech team. The Tech Senior leadership is shit. They deserve it, but for now, it's us who are facing challanges.2 -
One day, one of my clients asked me to re-design their website that is running on Wix. I thought It was not a big deal... Just a couple fucking drag-drops & boom.
But while designing, I realized what a fucking piece of shit Wix developers made over time. I've never used to suck a disgusting website builder ever in my entire life.
I write codes to build any type of website, web app etc. I was happily living my dev life. But, after using Wix for 24 fucking hours, I hate my job as a web developer.
Wix is so bad that I lose all my confidence & doubt about my 5 years of web development career.
Fucking piece of shit.4 -
I dunno if you gents remember the Nickelodeon show known as Drake and Josh.
It was pretty big in Mexico and the U.S.
Well, one of the characters from that show is the singer/actor Drake Bell.
For a while, Drake Bell would **constantly** tweet about how much Justin Bieber sucks.
I aint denying that Justin Bieber sucks, i don't like his music at all.
But the constant attacks came out as jealousy, at least to me.
What does this has to do with development or even computers? Well this is EXACTLY how I feel about Louis Rossman CONSTANTLY making videos about apple products.
We get it man we really do, sadly for a lot of us the only way to get ios development done is through a fucking Mac
EVEN if his whiny ass is right about the hardware not being top notch and all that shit I AM still not able to explain a 2013(early...as in january) macbook pro still working with literally NO fucking problems. Before that the other macbook was just changed because we wanted the 2013 model. The thing worked, the one before did so too and the 2017 model that I have works, amazingly so i will add.
Still, the army of dell,hp and lenovo laptops that I've had before just died or are not functioning properly. Either it is my shit luck or Apple's "shitty hardware" got something really fucking right.
I think its retarded really. If you don't like them then fine, you don't have to, personally I fucking love all computers and os, but I don't get fanboys hating for the sake of hate.
the fuck you care if I spend 2500 on a computer? I would the same shit for your mom and the computer would last me longer.
Does owning multiple macs make me better than you? No
Does this mean that you are piss poor and can't afford shit and that is why you are hating? No
Will I call you <insert number of insults> gor your choice of pc or os? No
What is retarded is this: you all are DEVELOPERS(at least a good chunk) and your ass better fucking know that some people USE a certain tool because IT IS THE RIGHT ONE FOR THE JOB.
It is a damn fine operating system, a really good computing experience. It ain't your taste? Fine, das cool, but for fucks sake it does not mean that the other people are idiots or whatever.
Grow the fuck up and get yourself an opinion.20 -
So my first dev job has ended up as fucking dat entry after one of the contractors got bored and left.
I’m an SQL Developer (at least that is my job title) and all I do is fuck around with exchange rates in spreadsheets.
The only “proper” development work they gave me hasn’t even been applied to the test server yet (should have been done over a month ago)
And the project they gave me to look into migrating from sourcesafe to GitLab has ground to a halt.
I’ve been here 4 months and I want to quit already, that must be a record (for me at least)
I was keen an full of energy, willing to do some work from home etc. But a little piece of me dies every time i open Excel3 -
Agreed to help out these 2 guys on a minecraft mod pack idea they had... stipulated this is a side project for me and I'm not going to dedicate too much time to it. They were fine with that
Fast forward a few months main 'idea guy' loses his job so spends more time on the pack and starts hounding me for progress and updates and throwing more and more things for me to do. He's also getting progressively angrier at my lack of substantial progress
Like fuck dude i told you this is s fucking side project to me. I'll work on it when I fucking want to. Hell I'm one more shouting match away from telling him to fuck off and find some other dumbass to be the only programmer in this group and get ignored when it comes to fucking anything else
Their idea of 'source control' is a fucking multi Mc instance that gets shared by the main guy every time HE changes anything. Any scripts or configuration edits I do I need to walk him through so he can update that instance
No clue why I put up with it so long. Maybe because other guy was a cool friend back in college. But at this point they both can fuck off6 -
Weeks ago, a change went into production. For some reason, we can't implement our own changes or create new databases in production, we have to have a whole different department do it. This would be great except for one thing:
THEY CAN'T THINK FOR THEMSELVES. I've had to tell them how to run scripts I wrote. I've had to tell them how to fix problems that arise.
Back to that script ran three weeks ago or so. It didn't add permissions to allow me, the system and application developer to see the stored procedure, much less run it. Application can't run it. Thankfully the application works without it.
Fast forward to tonight. My change that I'm attempting to implement is the creation of the stored procedure, because nothing could see it, I assumed it didn't exist... reasonable, right? Database folks tells me it exists. They then tell me they can't give me nor the application permissions because it doesn't ask for it in the change plan.
Excuse me.... WHAT FUCKING WORLD DOES IT MAKE SENSE TO CREATE SOMETHING AND HIDE IT FROM THE CREATOR LET ALONE THE APPLICATION SO IT CAN'T USE IT?! FUCKING THINK. WHY WOULD I WASTE MY FUCKING TIME TO TALK TO YOU OFFSHORE PIECES OF SHIT AT 10PM WHEN I'D RATHER PLAY VIDEO GAMES.
I'm so fucking done with enterprises. Someone with reasonable job security at a startup, please hire me. You will probably pay me more fucking money than this company does anyway.
Now on to my second change of the night. Thankfully I don't have to rely on anyone outside of me... so I won't be wasting my fucking time. -
Snapchat is by far the worst app ever developed. I like the concept but the actual development of the app is fucking garbage. It hurts my head that they haven't given a fuck about usability, optimisation or anything for that matter considering its one of the top social media platforms. It disgusts me, though Instagram has completely ripped off Snapchat in so many ways; they've done a hell of a better job at it and if people weren't so tired to SC I'm sure it would be dead by now.
Slow UI, slow gestures, probably the highest amount of bugs and crashes, shit camera because it thinks it can do a better job than the native API at rendering, painfully slow upload, stupid "featured" stories that you cannot get rid off and slow the fuck out of the app, battery drain even worse than FB, oh and not to forget that once you accidentally enable your location it's impossible to switch it off, the best you can do is hide it from everyone. I can probably go on and on with the endless issues this shit has.5 -
Honestly now that I have a job and I work with good people, being on devrant anymore just ruins my day. I love it when people rant about their jobs and code, and I love it when people share cool stuff on here. But the childish and toxic behavior leaves such a sour taste in my mouth. I hope I see you assholes (you know who you are) on the street so I can smack you, and you deserve every bit of what's coming to you. I hope you can turn your life around and actually help the world one day. Til then, I'm going to enjoy my life, because my life is fucking amazing. bye!2
-
Recruiters. Recruiters everywhere. I know, I know, F# seems to be the new hot thing now that FP has gained popularity and every bleeding company is looking for one. Well guess what? You got to make a pretty darn good offer for me to jump ship, and no, I’m not going to make much of an effort myself. If you want me, you sell me the job. I’m not going to do the selling here. I’ll come to the interview, do a programming test if I must but I bloody sure won’t tailor you a fucking resume. Everything’s on LinkedIn and here, have a link to my gh acco. That should be enough. No? Well go fuck yourself!3
-
New in my job
Start to work on a abandoned project for one of our client not very happy cause the lack of update
Go for a critical issue which exists since 2 months where everyone was telling me that they passed a huge time working on it with no answer
*check error*
*check code*
The code is so fucking much not DRY so I was able to see the same 4-5 incriminated lines elsewhere
*see that the request is lacking of one parameters just has the error suggests*
*copy paste the missing line*
*it works*
I’m now a hero for them but they become fucking peasants for me
(In addition, when code reviewing, some one had the nerve to tell me that “haha it was nothing much finally, it was easy”
To him : fuck you, eat my 💩) -
!rant
One of the downsides of my job is that I do User Support at three levels...
Sometimes they can with a valid support request, and sometimes it can be a easy one, sometimes isn't.
But there are times when they came with an idiotic situation that (most of times) it can be avoided if they can read the fucking message that the application in question show to them.
In those times, I already knew the problem they have by the time they already finished to describe it... In the meanwhile my thoughts go down into a rabbit hole and forgot the whole point of the call 😂
Oh... Well, at least I can fake that I was passing inside a tunnel 😂4 -
Job frustrated me again today.
The shit just keeps on commiting suicide...
Cannot talk much about it, but essentially it's faulty software killing randomly one or one up to N servers running elasticsearch...
Conversation between me and a good friend:
Me: No gaming today, work todo.
Him: noooo...
Me: Yes...... Could u go buy some groceries? Household help is sick.
Him: maybe...what u need?
Me: coffee. I need frigging fucking coffee.
Him: ok. How bad is it.......
Me: empty today.
Him: will be at your house in hour. DON'T DO ANYTHING STUPID.
...
It's funny how good friends immediately sense danger and become very attentive when the lack of coffee and myself is mentioned in one sentence.5 -
In a time where a web dev is expected to know, well.. everything... Backend -JAVA, python, nodejs and C++ would be great.
Front- angular, react, other 10 libs
DBs -sql, mongo, redis, elastic, kafka, rebbitmq
Also be devops on the side with AWS and docker kubernetis and more stuff
How the f is that possible?
In my real job for the last couple of years and different companies, I usually use 1 language/framework & 1 main DB.. and although it's possible in some companies, but in mine, ppl dont get access to AWS etc..
So let's say there's me.. a server side dev for years.
So I decide to be better and learn Golang.. cool lang, never needed in my job, after few days of not using it I forgot all I learned and that was it.
Then I realized I gotta know some frontend cause everyone want a fullstack ninja nowadays.. so I tried Vuejs.. it was amazing .. never got to use it at work, cause i was a backend, and we didnt use frameworks on our products back then..
Also forgotten.
Then I decided to learned nodejs, because this is the coolest thing ever.. hated it, but whatever... Never got to use it at work, cause everything was written in other lang which the whole team knew... Forgot the little i knew.
Then I decided, its time to see what Angular is, cause everyone started using it... similar idea to vuejs which i barely remembered, but wow it's a lot of code to remember, or I'll have to google everything.. so I went over it, but can't say i even learned it.
Now Im trying to move on to python, which, I really am learning in depth.. however, since I dont have real experience with it, no one gives me a shot at being a python dev, so again i feel like I'm trying to memorize syntax and wasting my time..
Tired of seeing React in all job ads, i decided to have a look what's that all about.. and whadoyaknow... It's fucking the same idea as vue/angular with again different syntax..
THIS IS CRAZY!
in how many syntaxes do i need to know how to make a fucking crud api, and a page with same fucking post form, TO BE A GOOD PROGRAMMER?!?6 -
Recruiter answered me
Rejected
They decided to choose another candidate because... [the reason will be announced at the end of this rant]
...
I was working on my project
I am learning new tech
And shitting 10 times a day from these jobs and recruiters, the usual me
HE the recruiter contacted me a few days ago
HE offered me nodejs position
I AM the one who was HONEST and told him i dont work in nodejs i work in java
HE then continued the conversation
HE offered me a java spring boot backend position
I AM the one who read the requirements
🔥🔥🔥
REQUIREMENTS: 3+ years of experience
🔥🔥🔥
I AM the one who told him i have 5+ years of java spring boot and 8+ years of java experience.
HE said great I'll contact the clients and let them know
TWO WEEKS LATER OF SILENCE
"unfortunately they chose some other candidate because they need someone with 10+ years of experience for this role"
---
Are you fuc
Fucking
Ki
Wasting my Fucking time?
You decide to slam into my peace and offer me a job position with ALL THE REQUIREMENTS I FULFILL, JUST TO RANDOMLY REJECT ME FOR AN INVALID FUCKING REASON?
If i said i had 10 years of experience
They would reject me because i dont have 15+
If i had 15+ years of experience i would get rejected for not having 30+
If i had 30+ years of experience fucking your whole family and bombing them to dust like in palestine till their bones die and worms eat your fucking down syndrome brains, they would say i need 160+ year of experience
Fyck you
Truly.
From the bottom
Of my fucking balls and cum
From my fucking dick
From my fucking shit and asshole
From my vomit
I wish you death.
I wish karma to kill all of their family members (the clients who rejected me) slowly one by one. Final destination accidents type of deaths. Truly i hope you and wish you the worst.
[Here the intro continues]
I will repeat again:
- REQUIREMENTS: 3+ years
I have:
- 8+ years
They rejected me because:
- I don't have 10+ years
I told all of this to recruiter now. Politely but because im losing my patience i was very very passive aggressive with my response. In the context of
1. I TRULY dont give a fuck for your rejection (which is the truth)
2. Your clients are low IQ dumb as fucking retards because they choose people based on the YEARS OF EXPERIENCE
3. Explained him: IF YOU ARE SO FUCKING STUPID TO UNDERSTAND THIS COMMON SENSE, I'LL EXPLAIN IT TO YOU: CHOOSING DEVS SOLELY BASED ON THE YEARS OF EXPERIENCE MEANS YOU ARE FUCKING STUPUD. There are devs with 2 years of experience who are WAY smarter better efficient and more knowledgeable than some devs with 5-7 OR MORE years of experience. Thats because some people progress better faster or more efficiently in 2 years while others need 5 years. Etc. You're fucking stupid as shit for this sole decision
4. Indirectly let him know that i am not pissed off for rejection. I am pissed off for my time being FUCKING WASTED.
5. Also pointed him out: your job description says its looking for a dev with 3+ years of experience i told you i have 8+ and you reject me because I don't have 10+. Are you Fucking stupid? Fuck you. Truly fuck off. Get the fuck off my dick and eat the shits i shit straight out of my asshole. I'll shit in your fucking mouth you fucking bitch. Your wife also probably fucks some other guys while you're at work and she doesnt respect you or love you. In the matter of fact give me your fucking wife/gf and I'll Fucking fuck her to death
To the clients once again: Truly i hope Hamas fires a missile at israel but misses and hits your fucking home and your whole fucking family blows up to atoms and particles. Completely erased from existence.14 -
TLDR;
I remissness about Yahoo site builder and talk about finding the record of the Google search that changed my life a long time ago and I think it's fucking great.
Earlier I re-installed google chrome but unlike every other time, this time I forgot to turn off the auto-sync feature. I only realized this when I opened gmail and it pre-populated my login info with the info of my very first, long forgotten gmail account.
So naturally I went exploring... after going through the mails I decided to check out the actual Google account to see if there was anything of interest there and lo and behold I found around 7 years of browsing history that I had no idea Google stored at the time.
As scary as it was to see I'm kinda glad about it now because aside from finding out that I was going through an Asian porn phase in 2008 I also found the one Google search record that changed my life.
It was a search to download Yahoo site builder followed by a bunch more on how to use it.
I had stumbled across a random article about it and it caught my eye because I needed a website for the grocery store I was a manager of back then.
Thankfully it was a fucking horrible WYSIWYG editor. I recall it acting almost identical to Word at the time - I would save and back up my site constantly because moving something 1px would fuck the layout up and burn everything to the ground, cntrl+z would try and do something, reversing only my last action while leaving the rest of the site in tatters and I didn't have the skills to understand or fix it...
Ultimately my frustration led me learn a bit of html & css and a week or so later It became apparent it would be easier to scratch code the damn thing so I uninstalled Yahoo site builder and started all over again.
Learning & building that site in notepad ignited my passion for coding and less than a year later I left my shitty dead end job to join a brand new tech company created with the help of a like minded investor officially employed as a developer. Let help you understand just how big this achievement was for me - I had been trying to find a job, ANY job in I.T even at a call center level without success for 6 years because I dropped out of school.
In 6 years as an active job seeker I only received one phone call about a job opportunity which ended very quickly once they realised they had misread my CV. In all those years I never even got a single job interview.
After that I spent the next 3 years rolling out and improving the cloud based loyalty card system I had written for my store out on a national scale and the rest is history. Since then I have never been judged by a crappy piece of paper, hated my job or struggled to find a new one.
What a beautiful search result that was to find.
I dedicate this rant to Yahoo, with my sincere gratitude for making a shitty WYSIWYG editor that was so bad it pissed me off enough to make me actually learn something.2 -
Had harsh words to a recruitment agency a few days ago who have been emailing me completely irrelevant job specs for weeks. (Side note, I don't know these people or how I ended up on the list in the first place, i'm not looking).
Got an apology this morning from one of the agents, their manager also just sent me a mail to apologise, as she can see from the records i've received a lot of crap ... but she also took a moment to let me know she does have a role that might actually suit my skill set.
Are you fucking kidding me?
"Why doesn't anyone reply to my emails" - because you are the devil and can't be trusted. -
I fucking hate my job so much. I feel like I work harder than anyone at my level, yet I can't get promoted. I'm so fucking sick of putting in effort for nothing. We all get paid really well, and yet no one seems to give a shit about the work. Meanwhile I'm busting my ass, for what? No promotion.
For promo to next level, the projects I work on aren't supposed to matter, just the execution. And yet, I get told I don't have enough impact when I'm interested in promo? How can I, I have no fucking choice what I work on you fuckers.
Fucking bullshit job.7 -
This supposed to be a rant but I have no words to describe in how big fucking mess I am right now while looking for a new workplace...
It’s most unorganized experience that I am part of...
It’s worse then looking for lost key using bare hands in a shit hole....
With last one at least you know what to expect and you have some chances to make some decisions. The hiring otherwise it’s like lottery...
There are no words to describe it.
Fuck...
Let everyone looking for a job right now have my condolences... -
I hate those mother fucking, Cock sucking, dick farting retarded faggots, who get the opportunity of a new job/internship just because they have a certain "relative" in the said company/organisation.
I mean its ok that you are getting an opportunity, but just don't act all-knowing-god-tier while you don't even know how to print a statement in c++ and got it.
How many more relationships should I increase of mine so that I get into the same position like them.
One of my friends got the internship just because his girlfriend's brother works for the firm.
Now that's just super barbaric unless he gave a blowjob to the gf's brother.
Their Fucking assholes need to be drilled by a giant pile drivers.5 -
Fucking multilanguage mind.
My language capability is literally splitting in half making me more and more retarded/incapable in both languages (my native and English).
The main reason is that my daily reading and listening is mostly in English(and happen online) meanwhile I work and have to interact at the job in native language, which is much less demanding of native language interactions because I code in silence 😣
If only the native language content was as good and as interesting as the English one, but Italy doesn't an alternative to hackernews, FUCK ME7 -
!dev.rant
So in just a matter of minutes my job security has crashed and any week could be my last again all because my jobs head office decided to change everyones positions in management...
So once again I'm back to square one in yet another useless fucking job search with barely anything to offer other than 5 years of retail experience and 3 years of IT support... Fan-fucking-tastic, would almost be more survivable to just go on centre link at this point -,- -
I am looking for a job. Ok, alright. This woman calls me with her phone. After a bit of a coordination effort, she proceeds to give me the most pyramid scheme speech that could pyramid scheme. And she said I was fucking chosen because of my IT knowledge... Which I feel fucking insulted about.
This is not my first time brushing against pyramid schemes. Oriflame, if you've heard of it, is another one of the pyramid schemes that, confusingly enough, has product.
But my whole point is, they literally hunted me down because of my age, asked about my goddamn zodiac sign which is always a really good sign (/s), asked me shit like if I have children etc. Like, really. And left no space not to answer most of these.
The whole pyramid scheme industry is basically marketing itself to usually stay-at-home moms, promises an opportunity, etc and they are hard to weed out because they are making their way to normal job hunting websites. Which is how I ran into my first one.
I feel insulted that they'd do this stuff to me but here we are. At least I get the choice of blocking and maybe reporting.
But it really discourages me that that is how things are...5 -
After the servers got shut down because someone used them for illegal advertisement, after me putting in 30-35 hours a week on the side of my studies. Since it was my job to keep them running and doing DevOps work, they just slowly froze me out of the company without even firing me. I even asked them what I should be working on then. Their answer was of course: you can make us some advertising landing pages. Can you make one that looks like Facebook?
Nope, just fucking nope. -
By far one of the most non toxic communities has to be that of perl monks. The community is amazingly welcoming of new people and the shit that these dudes talk about is so fucking interesting. That one is definitely one of the last remaining "hacker" communities still going around the net. Really wish there was Perl around where I live. One would be lucky to find a programming job, let alone one in such language.1
-
I work remotely for a team that works together in an office, and this morning on the conference call a team member said
"one thing i think we need to do with this is stay on task, because while these things that have been added are cool we don't need to be doing anything not outlined in the MVC requirements"
Okay first of all -- this is a completely foreign technology to this team. It's not like I diddled around adding fancy animations and no function. The problem working in a new technology with an old mindset is assuming that it's going to move linearly from step 1 to step 2. And that drives me fucking insane.
- Progress in paid contracted work is done by staying on task.
- Progress in research isn't done linearly. You have to try shit -- and figure out what doesn't work.
I feel bad because I'll chime in and shoot down ideas with a fucking guided missile because I know the answer and I've done the fucking research -- I'm not a dick about it, but replying with a simple "no that's not possible, because of this or that", the call becomes silent for 30 seconds because I've shattered their understanding of the technology because nobody has taken the time to understand anything about how this thing works!!
So until they either listen to me, ask me, or learn the smallest amount to get on my fucking level, I'll keep progressing -- because whether the old world idealists like it or not -- that's my job.
Progress.
</ rant>14 -
I take a moment for myself and assess the situation from a bird's view.
Then, I objectively look at the current situation and my response/reaction to this and try to change my thinking process/acting to a more rational one.
But, also, my general way of thinking in the cyber security world plus how I'm hardwired to think in a 'paranoid' kind of way makes my current job so fucking perfect for me that i often think about that and the fact that there aren't many people around who have this.1 -
Nothing makes me not want to take a full-time job at your company more than having to go through IT tickets every quarter year when my password expires to actually change my password. Why have a fucking self-service portal for employees if logging in with an expired password doesn't work and the reset password link tells me that I need to log in to enroll with security questions (???). It feels like these websites are glued together with sticks and spit and there's a million of them each sporting one specific purpose! I have to go through this shit multiple times since I'm an intern and I didn't have access to my account through the course of the semester. Get your fucking shit together!1
-
So I have a job at a client to fix their system because the last systemadmin fucked everything up. One of the things I need to do is let the boss work from home.
No problem. I set up a vpn connection to work and everything just works. Except that the home network had the same dhcp range so that had to change.
I login on the router and literally everything is fucking locked. I call them and they send me a new router same fucking problem. So we bought an asus router so I finally can fix it.
QUESS WHAT THE FUCKING GARBAGE DOESNT EVEN HAVE BRIDGE MODE. FUCK KPN AND THEIR MODEMS.1 -
Fuck all of these recruiters who says that I am right for the job but after sending a CV and my hourly rate, the application is dead in the water.
So, I am not the right one to do the job, why do you fucking dare to say that in the first place? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!4 -
Until today, I had assumed deploying stuff to prod would NOT be one of my responsabilities in this company. Apparently that's not the case.
Had to deploy my code and pray it didn't break anything. Why is this a big deal at all?
Well you see, there is no repository. At all. No git, no svn, not even duplicate folders. No tests, no pipeline. Just a bunch of CPanels.
Had to manually copy files and folders from the development site to the production site and partially copy a database. "Just drag and drop" were the instructions I was given.
As if using CakePHP2, PHP5 and having to parse fucking Excel files wasn't bad enough, now I have to deal with one of the worst ways to deploy code.
Fuck it, I'm switching on the looking-for-job flag on linkedin.5 -
While i was still in college, i was an IT guy in a Staples.
I implemented an input form that must be filled so we (IT guys) take in charge. And for one month mostly say to EVERYONE that THEY MUST FILL IT.
So one day, after a really shitty morning, a cliznt come to take back his computer. And there where no side panel. I didn't find then so i asked my manager (who filled the fucking form), if he was there. And he start giving me shit.
After 30mins i go talk to the client to explain the problem and he said "But there was no left panel".
And the next day i wrote my forst anger filled resignation letter.
A week later a got a part time job as web dev (integration) -
Fucking hours counting systems.
One of the hardest part of consulting job is to put hours into fucking table.
One of those solutions is so smart that when I make mistake I need to call manager to unlock the input.
My friend from work compared it to playing saper.
Some of those systems work only in IE.
Some of those run java inside browser.
Some I need to be in company domain others I need to logout from company domain.
I see the amazing articles about those amazing software solutions, still opening IE and running java to put digit into text input or pick number from select.
Fucking nightmare. -
Fuuuuuuuuuuccccccckk you gulp, you have one fucking job. Front-end web Devs this is a warning for all of you out there. Go with webpack always.5
-
I've been trying for the last 3 months to land my first development job. I have a good (over 3 years) amount of experience, but no industry experience and no degree. So it's been a uphill battle. Currently working at a call center making garbage and most of my time and energy is invested into this. Currently am not mobile so most of my money is being geared towards that. It's just frustrating to see all these over glorified job postings that ask so much for just entry levels. I haven't even gotten a damn interview, I feel like in houston it's either you have a degree or you are not even considered for just a fucking interview. If I can get at least one they will be able to see my drive, persistence and skills that have been developed overtime. And fuck recruiters, have been interfacing with them over linkedin and not one of them seemed eager (initially yes) to land me an interview. Most of these fucks don't even fucking understand the technology or buzzwords that are on the job posting. If I were a recruiter I would at least put a little research into what the different technologies are so the process will seem less abstract. The tech will have more meaning and maybe I would be able to get a better success rate with clients if I knew what was really required of them. Not just looking at xyz and seeing if client has experience with them, but really see if they know what they are; that way I will have more confidence sending them into an interview. But of course that's not how it works. "Oh yeah Java and javascript are very similar"... get the fuck out of here.13
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So I'm wondering how I'm getting a date that, according to the settings should not be that one in that case, but is pretty fucking close (so much so that I first thought that was the correct one).
Then I realise it's because I'm hitting a case where I can't get all the necessary info so I literally made a method called GuessDate and it tries to guess the date based on available info and it did an amazing job, but it didn't have all the data so it's slightly off.
I both love and hate programming right now :)2 -
Best client I have ever experienced. Kappa
So, I got job to recreate one old website, because the old one was incredibly fucked up. She told us, it was made by someone retarded.
The code was fucked up even more than UI. It was definitely written by some kind of idiot. Diacritics, mixed languages, no OOP, no FW, just copy&paste. Yeah copy and paste for every page.
The DB was another level of shit. Inifine is not enough to describe it. Column names with whitespace, diacritics, uppercase, lowercase...pure hell. Yeah and I had to import it.
Whenthe new website was ready for testing I got an email from her that it was her who made the website... HER!! Fucking hell, no more of this please!1 -
How do you get over the bad times? I keep having to work with shitty legacy systems that were written in perl and flash in the 90s, but my boss keeps telling me "No" on redoing some of the bigger stuff even though it is really needed. I mean, that is your goal here, right? Rebuilding this POS? FFS you still stored passwords in plain text twoo weeks ago! But no, you's rather dig around in Perl than upset some random user because his fucking interface looks different.
But then I also have to work with another system that I could redo in Cake/Laravel in two weeks (it's literally getting and writing data to one table, so two views and user auth), and the previous dev just... made a huge mess. I mean, why would you need to post data asynchronously when it's this one stupid form ? Just do a regular form submit? And the system is really not suitable for extending, because everything is in the database, EVERYTHING! Like, html form inputs? So to add a simple input to the template I have to create a new input type in the types table and then add that to the form structure table? Only to have the input checked by fucking regex? REGEX! Why? Seriously, this is not some high end CMS that needs this level of code reusability No. This is a simple fucking form.
And I can't get it to work. No documentation of course. No comments, either. All of this makes me feel like I'm just the shittiest dev ever. I feel dumb, and useless. Haven't turned on my private PC in weeks because I see no reason to work on any of my own stuff.
I used to have a job, working with Magento and Wordpress. And yeah, it was horrible, it was chaos, but it was fun and I was great at it. I bent that motherfucking system to fit my needs. People respected my opinion, they were convinced I could program this and that, and I proved them right. Did I make mistakes? Hell yeah. Did I give up? Fuck no!
But now, I just feel like I can't even write a simple fucking form any more. I'm just so close to giving up on development as a whole, even though I love it so much.5 -
Just started as an intern as a web developer in a small company. I have about 4 semester of coding experience and was hoping to learn a lot new things. Well it turns out that the main developer who's responsible for building our product has no fucking clue what he's doing. Our biggest document has about 6k lines and it kills my 8 GB ram notebook. Instead of writing one nice function, solving the problem which is occurring frequently, he wrote the same fucking thing multiple times... In the same fucking document. That's just one of many things.
Well now my job is mostly trying to stay cool, while my notebook gets hot af and somehow keeping my code OCD bearable7 -
So..there is 2 of us working on a Wordpress site, my job is front-end and make it look nice, the other persons job is to do some backend development(dont ask me what and why, I have no idea). Basically, I was waiting for the other person to finish his part so I can do front end development. I was expecting it to be just a theme, and then I fix it, add new stuff, etc etc, like usually..but the horror I saw, THE FUCKING "BACKEND" PERSON HAS ACTUALLY MADE A FUCKING THEME EVEN THOUGH IT IS MY FUCKING JOB. Now dont get me wrong, I wouldnt mind if I did almost zero work and got paid, but..THE FUCKING THEME WAS UGLY AS A TWO HEADED DICK SMOKING A FUCKING CIGARETTE. There was STRONG RED FUCKING EVERYWHERE, padding between posts was basically -20px. Well ok, I could have just started making a new theme, but there was already some stuff in this one we needed so I went it it and tried to make it look nice. And trust me, it is great now, great colors, fonts, shadows, button animations, everything, even looks great on mobile.
I started making some changes to the header, and I noticed that post title changes also..hmm wonder why..So I inspect element and what do I see, TAG OF THE FUCKING POST TITLE IS <HEADER>???? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, IF YOU TRIED TO DO SOME FRONT END, AND YOU SAY YOU KNOW SOME, WHY DO FUCKING FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT???????? WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO MY JOB IF YOU SUCK AT IT??? DONT DO MY FUCKING JOB, I SUCK AT "BACKEND" AND I DONT FUCKING DEAL WITH DATABASES OR TRY TO MAKE THEM FOR YOU!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARHHHHHHHH FUCK -
Reading job offerings makes me want to choke their writers, I don't fucking care about all the fucking bs you are writing, just give a SHORT list with SIMPLE info.
Just one post already gave me a headache.2 -
I FUCKING GIVE UP!
Yep I'm pissed of :D I spend the last two months waiting like a idiot some business to answer about their job offers (more or less 3 in my area..)
Well I failed the last test of the first one, it was expected I guess. Lot of things happened but let's say I didn't use the approach that they were hoping me to use (you could have tell me you know...).
So... There is even one of the job offer, I called them already twice. Asking when they will call back. Each time it was : this week or the week after. Yeah I think that makes 5/6 weeks since the first time I called now...
But the thing which really piss me of. Is that I was waiting like a idiot, doing mostly nothing. Like if I couldn't focus on my projects before that I get a job... Well I guess when everyone is asking about when you will have a job or a girlfriend, that's not the atmosphere that I love to work with T. T
Oh yeah, no dev related. But I fall in love with a Russian girl (I'm a French guy btw). I completely messed up the relationship though xD well no way that I'm giving up anyway. And that's mostly thanks to her that I just woke up of that shitty period ^^
Sooo I started to gather people from all over the world on LinkedIn. Checking job offers on StackOverflow. And Monday I'll start writing some post on LinkedIn searching for a job in the whole fucking world. I hope there will have a business who wants a junior C++ dev :P Remote probably, I'd like to travel easily (yeah, I probably want to go to Russia a little too xP)
That's all :D I FUCKING GIVE UP ABOUT WAITING DOING NOTHING LIKE A IDIOT!!!9 -
Unemployment week one.
Tired of unsuccessful HR and engineering talks with people who don’t know what they want.
When you answer their questions they got pissed because they had something else in mind. Sorry I don’t read in people’s minds asshole.
Others try to be smart and give you some fancy acronyms. Yeah because that’s most important in coding - to memorize useless acronyms.
I responded with acronyms I know and they got pissed more cause my are more funny and cover all of theirs. Thanks KISS 💋
Some of them are like I am fucking smartest asshole on this video chat and you can’t have been working with all of those technologies, yeah I just typed hello world for 15 years in one language and stupid /REST shitty software like you do it in your one job in your lifetime.
Others are asking for cv, talking about this fancy great project that in fact you know how it will look like cause you’re experienced motherfucker who can pick up nuisance but still lets get hired first and then think what to do next with this shitty crap. So they respond after two weeks that client changed their mind and if you want to fill some quiz about your hiring process.
There are also ones that got impressed so much they’re talking 1 hour that you will be our next cto and then ending process with email that there were better candidates and also post same offer on job board next day 🤦♂️
I think I just skip this shitty nightmare and concentrate on some personal project until I spend all my savings.
I just need to concentrate on one thing and not get distracted with 1000s of voices shouting “pick me” in my head.
Fuuuuuuck
If you got offended fuck you unless you like it.
After working in one project in a big happy days bubble without distraction for couple of years I underestimated how fucked up people are in real world.
We’re making hell by ourselves on this planet we don’t need much help.3 -
First rant that I really want to get out of my chest!
Never hated a job as much as this one. Haven’t done any development/programming related work since I joined. I have been mostly configuring Linux systems for IoT devices. When I get stuck at an issue, it takes me many frustrating nights to figure it out because no one on the team wants to deal with Linux shit… they’d rather be doing real development work (someone actually stated this!). There’s no one else on the team that knows Linux. Even the manager that was supposedly a Linux fanatic can’t even answer some of my questions and if they do, it’s the wrong fucking answer. Joined the company because they sold it as startup team with big money backing. Was excited to learn new technologies, new best software engineering practices, add new programming languages to my resume. But nope, been stuck at configuring Linux systems. At one point I was just pumping out updated Linux images with our updated application for a month straight. I was so excited when a development task was assigned to me a couple weeks back, but guess what?! There were Linux configuration tasks that no one knows how to do or don’t want to look at it, so my one and only fucking development work was swapped out!
And the funny thing is, I barely had any Linux experience when I joined. Why the fuck was I hired?
Man, I even bought books related to Linux programming (application and kernel) before I joined. Those books barely have a crease in them. What a waste.
Now in my free time, I’ve been learning new technologies on my own. Doing my own projects. But damn, I lose a lot of family time. Sorry wifey, I haven’t been paying a lot of attention to you!
But who knows, maybe this experience will have a silver lining in the end.
Thanks for reading :)2 -
So since starting my new role I have had nothing to rant about. That changed today.
HR waited til one day past payroll cut off to issue my paperwork. Meaning I get paid at my old rate this month and then get back pay in my November pay slip.
Those mother cunting bastards waited one day extra to screw me for the whole month.
I've been waiting since the end of September for these twat monkeys to get off their rotting arses and sort this and they do it one day late.
It's a good job that I don't know where they are located, nothing good would be waiting for them if I did.
Edit:
As this got cut from the tags:
HR please kindly go find a rotting puss filled dick and shove it up your lazy fucking arse you pitiful wastes of human meat bags.1 -
So in grade 11 (2 years ago),i had to do something called "job shadowing".basically you choose a profession and you go to a workplace. My cousin (who's in the same SAP industry)got me into this SAP development place.there were like quite a few "developers" but mostly business analysts.they made me learn this (in my oppinion) absolute shit language called ABAP which I found to be mostly glorified SQL . First I had to just create a small program which I did in like a few minutes after my mentor taught me the basic commands but you have to learn alot of module numbers and other shit.and guess what ,I remember I had to end one liners with a damn full stop,seriously fucking irritating.
So,worst dev technology I've worked with ever is SAP.Bad thing is my cousin and my uncle are really trying to take me into that bullshit SAP shit of theirs but I always refuse.will never step my foot into a SAP development job ever.3 -
Manager does nothing but give me more work. Can't code. doesn't even get git issues. Last in first out yet I'm first in last out. At end of meeting he says, "great job but one comment, you should say 'We' not 'I', cuz this is a team effort"
Are you fucking kidding me dude? Add it as another issue.... Oh wait -
Not a rant but sort of a rant.
Getting REAL fucking tired of the corporate rat race.
Thought Bubble ...
{If I quit this stupid job I could do freelance sites}
Then I realized that I have no idea what skill set it takes to be a freelance developer. I only know my one little corner. Once I commit my code it goes off down the assembly line for others to worry about testing, deployment, hosting, security and other things I have no idea about.
So tell me freelancers, is the grass greener? What additonal skills do you have to have the us enterprise folks would have no idea about?
Or are you making huge bucks where you overcharge for Wix sites that do not suck?9 -
"We've got a new opportunity for you."
I'm a fucking rookie. I didn't know the meaning of this sentence. Suddenly, I become the "IP PBX expert" of the society.
"-Okay, it's some networking shit, I thing I'm good at networking shit. Piece of cake.
-Okay great, you have one month to learn how this thing works, because we WILL provide this kind of service."
Damn.
I spent one month learning this shit on my free time, printing RFCs and living in the fucking MATRIX to not fuck up on the very first day doing that, just in case something on the customers' network fucks with the PABX or something like that.
Oh yeah, I forgot: I'm paid 80% of the minimum wage because I am actually not qualified to do my job and I'm spending one week a month to learn how to IT (some french weirdness I think, if not, maybe it's the germans' fault. Also yes, 100% legal).
Today, they announced me that they "changed their mind".
I'm pissed.1 -
Everytime I consult with senior devs on how to transition from my sysadmin job and get my first dev job they always tell me to get a CS degree.
Look. I will get that fucking degree eventually. But I want to build up dev skills and learn from a company before killing myself over math crap for 3 years. But it's like a vicious cycle. Every junior position I apply to rejects me because I have no degree.
I'm fucking frustrated and depressed.
What should I do? I want to break from the IT meme and get a dev job.
In the meantime I'm doing small projects and freelancing in my very little free time. But I feel I'll never truly be a developer until I work as one professionally.4 -
Why do my brain just stops working on technical interviews? I say the most random crap as an answer even though I know the fucking right one. Well this way I'm not getting a job anytime soon.2
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Why can't people just do their fucking jobs? How hard is it to understand? Managers keep time, resources and risks in check and inform the developers. Developers develop and test the system. How the fuck do we have manager for agile, manager for program a manager for program b, risk mitigation manager, this shit manager that shit manager . For fucks sake with this much management we should be like fuckin bee nest and not an unorganized mess. In the end it turns out that literally there are more managers than developers just because they cannot fire an incapable idiot and they hire the next one. It is plain fucking simple - if you are not fit for the job get lost or make yourself fit. For fucks sake.
It really makes me wonder are there any well organized companies out there? -
Reading over at zerohedge.
And I just wanted to comment on what this one guy posted:
"People that show up on time, dressed to work, not stoned. People that don't stop in the middle of the day to take care of personal matters. People that deliver to the right location. People that don't steal or damage product.
We pay well over the national average for final mile truck drivers. 80% of the ones you get are worthless. The ones that do a good job we reward handsomely to keep them. We have had open reqs for two years now that we can't fill at just about any wage. "
If all the people you hire leave, or no one wants to work for you for any wage, the problem isnt the pool of new hires. The problem is you.
Like a certain fast casual chain that claim they train their employees, and then just toss line cooks on the line and scream at everyone on the line.
Saw it while I was at an interview. Seen it in other
Train your fucking people.
"Good" is now a synonym for "people I dont want the expense of training, and people trained at someone elses expense."
Train your fucking people or gtfo of busines because you have no business being in business otherwise.2 -
I have more of those with personal life affecting job. I am currently going through one of those when my emotional attachments stop my brain from functioning (those damn hormones! 👊) and I am literally too old to be played with via feelings, but here I am. 🙄 Owner of a stupid fucking heart.3
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🌎🌏🌍
The world needs to know the truth
👁️👁️👁️
🔥🔥🔥
Have to make a separate rant for this cause it deserves to be outlined and for the whole world to know the truth about my junkhole trash country Serbia (europe)
🔥🔥🔥
$1000 usd is 6 figures in my currency.
In economy schools they said
If you earn $1200/month usd in serbia you are in TOP 3% of highest earners
If you earn $2500/month usd in serbia you are in TOP 1% of highest earners
This must mean that i am now in TOP what 10% of highest earners in my country?
A bearly over 10,000$ usd a year, is TOP 10% of earners in Serbia. And i have to work 2 or perhaps 3 dev jobs as 1 person to be fortunate enough to be in those TOP 10%
And every day i keep seeing multiple 5 figure and 6 figure USD expensive cars, lambos ferraris brabus g wagons audi rs7 mercedes s class (2023) porsches, and when I say porsches people here LOVE porsches so much more than any other fucking car that porsche has became the most common car here that people drive! A used Porsche is at minimum 80,000$ usd!!! Thats 8+ years working my job, assuming im not spending 1 single cent, just to buy a used porsche, while hundreds of people drive them daily!!!!
My neighbor sold his mercedes s class and bought a GLS AMG 2023 brand new for over 225,000 fucking $!!!! Thats over 225 YEARS OF MY LIFE working this matrix job without spending a cent to buy that car. This is fucking RIDICULOUS
The world HAS to know the truth about corruption and slavery happening in Serbia. I will be the voice of truth that shall not be silenced. Anyone claiming otherwise is working for one of these corrupted shitfucks.
Incredible how corruption and unfairness sets you free out of the box than playing the matrix game. Unreal to me. I knew it was bad but i never knew it was THIS bad
If I was earning a normal wage salary i wouldnt be complaining. A normal wage salary for me is at minimum 100k a year. Or if i have to be generous then high end of 5 figures. Thats the only way to afford to buy one of these cars. Because how else do these fucking people buy them? Obviously not by working a matrix job
If you think i have unrealistic expectations then you need to unfuck your mind and realize that we are working a VERY difficult fucking job in this tech industry, SO difficult that a 100k should be the fucking minimum. Out of sheer respect towards this EXTREME HARD WORK, we DESERVE to get a high compensation in return -- not a fucking survival slavery wage salary bullshit! The moment you realize that you're underpaid if you earn less than 100k as a software engineer, is the moment you have unfucked your mind and now you have found the truth!18 -
As some of you might know I am currently working in a QA Team.
One of my "colleagues" asked me to help him with the automation of a simple page.
The tool we are using could not determine if a checkbox on a mask was checked or not so he decided to open a BUG!
This is not a bug the page is working fine (the checkmark is visible and the server handles the data correctly)!!
When I asked him why he opened the bug he said "Because I want the developer to make that easier for me!!!"
WTF This is your job! JUST GET IT FUCKING DONE!
I work my ass of to close the gap between testers and developers...
BUT IF I SEE THINGS LIKE THAT I UNDERSTAND EVERY DEV WHO WANTS TO PUNCH HIM INTO HIS FACE! -
Me: trying to do any simple fucking project
Me: cant figure out how to do something simple or cant figure out how to start or how something should work.
Me *Looks up problem* (everytime...)
results: SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT OF.
Am I just a shitty programmer, a shitty learner, or just not cut out for this? because I fucking Love this field. this is the only thing I ever want to do. BUT I CANT FIGURE ANYTHING OUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME EVEN WITH LANGUAGES IM GOOD AT!! WHICH IS JUST PYTHON AND IM STILL SHIT AT THAT.
I TRY TO DO PROJECTS WITH JS, OR C, OR PYTHON PICK WHICHEVER ONE. AND I NEVER KNOW HOW I SHOULD START IT, AND IF I LOOK UP HOW TO DO IT ITS SO MUCH LONGER AND COOLER AND BETTER THAN MY DUMBASS WOULD HAVE DONE (and longer in a good way because its well thought out and works)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET A REAL JOB IN THE FIELD IF I CANT MAKE THE RANDOM IDEAS THAT I SEE ON THE INTERNET AND WHY CANT I MAKE THEM AS GREAT OR LONG AND SHIT ON MY OWN. SO MANY PEOPLE CAN WRITE SO MANY LINES OF CODE AND FUNCTIONS AND ALL THIS SHIT THAT WORKS AND YEAH THEY LOOK UP SOME PROBLEMS BUT NOT HOW TO FUCKING DO THE ENTIRE THING LIKE SOME FUCKING RETARD
AWDJKBAKWJBDAOLK;JWDBOALBJKWODANLWIO;NIAWDN;PIAWLDJBAWIDHB
I CANT GO A PROJECT WITHOUT LOOKING UP HOW TO DO ANYTHING BECAUSE MY LITTLE BRAIN CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO IT14 -
Context: This team has been constantly behind on deliveries, ignoring advice from other teams or more experienced colleague, making mistake after mistake and now, just revealed they have major performance issues, as warned...
So, in the most recent Sprint review they were, once again, criticized for their bad approach and inability as a team to receive feedback and work on that feedback, resulting in mediocre development...
As I left the room I heard one of them say:
"We make this huge rocket that most wouldn't be capable of doing and they cry that it's blue and not green... Others make a ls on a command line and everybody applauds"
Now, this is for everyone to whom the shoe fits...
Listen here you little entitled snotty prick, where do you think you are!? Yes most should not make a rocket when the requirement was a bike! That's overengineering and besides that most of your decisions were arguably wrong!
I will never applaud you or anyone else for doing your fucking job and being mediocre about it... What we applaud is value added! Value to the project, to the process or to the team... Bring value and I will applaud, do your job and you get a salary. Be a snotty childish dipshit and you might find yourself forcefully searching for new professional challenge! -
Rejection 5 / 1000 of my 1000 job applications TikTok journey
I have rejection 6 ready but cant post more than 1 image at a time on devrant. Rejection 6 is the same company from rejection 4! They fucking rejected me TWICE. Because i asked them to tell ME out of ALL the positions they have available -- NOT A SINGLE ONE FITS MY PROFILE. DO THEY NOT CARE THAT I HAVE A COMPUTER SCIENCE DEGREE????????????????21 -
I think I may be someone's wk101soon given how things are going for me.
So I get shipped over to the new offices to do some work. Initially, I was supposed to be updating SQL stored procedures.
That I can handle, well my task is now to build the skeleton project for a web API in core 2.0 using domain driven design and onion architecture which the rest of the team will use.
Okay, I don't have any experience in any of that at all. And god bless the team lead explaining some stuff to me. But it's going to take more than a 20-minute chat here and there for this stuff to sink in.
And being told just to build it how you think it should be isn't great advice when I'm trying to figure out how the systems work.
Every other API project I look at is structured completely different from one another so looking for patterns has failed.
I'm fucking stressed out every bit of information I'm getting on whats potentially happening with my job im getting second hand from people. Because I can't access my emails while off-site something I'm repeatedly flagging.
Every job advert is painstakingly making it clear how out of date my skill set is (or lack of). Evidently, I've been way too lax, and this has been a kick in the bollocks I'm not likely to forget.
If we're being evaluated on performance to see who they'll keep, then I've failed at the first hurdle.
Life lesson for those in education, don't be this knob head here and get comfortable when you land a job. Just knowing about the tech that's commonly used in your field does jack all study it.
Not a structured/meaningful rant and shits probably not as bad as I see it. I've only chewed through one fingernail after all.1 -
I will create a 1,000-job-application challenge.
The goal is to apply to 1,000 different companies and see if i can make a guineas world record of getting 1,000 rejections in a row.
Each job application i will record and document it on tiktok. I will do this freely to show everyone my achievements skills and knowledge of why i deserve the salary i want to have (which is btw less than $20,000 a year) -- so im not asking for abnormally high salary.
If you're a company spinning millions od dollars PER MONTH but it's hard for you to spend less than $20,000 PER YEAR to pay me for my hard work -- with absolutely no respect, FUCK OFF.
I want to do this in realistically 4 months.
1000 jobs / 4 months = 250 applications a month
Or 8.33 but lets round it to 9 job applications PER DAY that i will make.
I will record 9 fucking tiktoks PER DAY documenting this modern day bullshit where i struggle to get a job EVEN AFTER GRADUATING WITH A FUCKING CS DEGREE.
I want to show the world how college was really a scam and document the proof how no one gives a shit about degree and everyone treats me as if i have no degree.
I will also shitpost here on the status throughout this journey.11 -
Me, working hard on a SQL project with a deadline that is half what it should be with no support from the other people on the project and was mostly made with with data I imagined would be in there cos no one could get me any fucking shit done (i.e. effectively designed, built, tested, fixed, upgraded, documented on my own for an entire weekly/monthly/ad-hoc analysis process that would output various reports for internal/external/management)
Manager - man who is a known waste of space but for some reason is in charge of the smallest part of the project, shouldn't have been fucking involved fucking management guzzling stain magnet...
Manager: Hey, do I need to refresh the database?
Me: .................
Me: .................
Me: ............I dunno, do you think we should refresh the database that this entire project is reliant? I mean...why do we need up to date transactions to analyse? Wait....you telling me it's not been being refreshed this ENTIRE time?
Manager: No....you never said I should. So should I?
Me: ..................I never said you should!?!? Are you not in the meetings talking about dependencies?????? Do you think i should have up to date trans or just run this with old stuff????? Why would you not update it!??!!?!?!? Its transactions...... (Desperately trying not to punch through my screen, through his, into his throat)
Manager: ..............
Me: .................
Manager: I think i'll refresh it and add it to the job?
Me: ....................(goes back to work cursing with music in so I think its quiet but who knows).
Tard, don't know how he even gets to work without someone holding his fucking hand.
Happy ending, I don't work there anymore :p
Sad ending, his spirit of tard follows me to my new jobs and possesses someone (or three sometimes) -
Does anyone think tech recruiters are failed used car salesmen?
Bad experiences this week
One reached out to me on clearance jobs to apply for a job that I applied for, interviewed and was turned down for because of course they do not know Javascript is not Java and they were looking for a Java developer. She didn’t remember and then never responded. Out of spite I replied all to the last email that company sent me but of course no one responded.
This person who says that she is a recruiter for GOOGLE does not know the difference from UX designer and UX developer.
“ UX design still involves coding... idk where you got information that UX designers don't code but they absolutely do. UX designers are simply front end software engineers that work on refining the user experience of a particular program app or website.”
I don’t know because I used to be a fucking UX developer and used to work with UX designers??? Who didn’t code because figuring out what humans what is tough enough on it’s own. UI designers may know html/css but that is it.
I know we are going into a recession and I need to start being nice to these dumb recruiters because I may need them one day.2 -
First job while in college... Was working for web dev team lamp set up before lamp was lamp (year was 2000).
Had deadline one week after summer vacation. Worked non stop a couple of days to get shit done and didn't make it. Got in a conflict with my manager in front of the team and I blew my steam off. Quit on the spot.
Lessons learned:
1. Don't be a fucking idiot when estimating work.
2. Be cool with other teammates, nobody cares about drama and nobody has to feel sorry for you.
3. Uhm, plan? Had entire fucking vacation to get work done. I was a fucking moron.
4. Burning out is stupid and unproductive.
5. Your manager can be as poor in management as you are. Your job is to try to make them better at it, as they have less visibility in the details.
Next job in grad school. Worked for a security company. Direct manager had the bright idea to make execs sign the change requests. WTF. Code was in Perl/php, a mess. Team rewrote back end DB access , taking over six months, or more, failing twice the deadline. After a final 48 hour burn out, we ship and get laid off the week after.
Lessons learned:
1. Don't work for dicks.
2. Don't be a dick yourself.
3. Don't work for dicks.
Third job was in silicon valley. It was a great company, and I stayed there for five years. -
!dev
Last year, we got a new DOCSIS modem from our ISP (Puma6-chipset, nuff said, not allowed to replace it with a proper one).
With this replacement modem came a splitter (to split internet signals from TV signals), keep this in mind for later.
It worked alright for a while, but fast forward to last Januari, our internet started acting up because the modem kept randomly rebooting.
So we had 3 maintenance workers come by already.
The first one replaced the wallplug.
The second one replaced the wallplug, saying that the previous maintenance worker did a shit job.
The third one replaced the splitter.
Now, later that evening, we got an email... stating that the costs would be 50 euro...
Ehm... what?
So I went to contact their customer servers and they said "but the splitter is part of the indoor installation. So if this splitter causes a malfunction, the maintenance worker will charge you for the visit".
So these fucking assholes give me a defective splitter and charge us to have it replaced?
They can suck my big black.
Still going on with the dispute now because that is some top level bullshit.
"What if it wasn't the fault of the splitter? Am I gonna get my money back?"1 -
How the fuck am I supposed to fucking keep working if these fucking clowns add mandatory peer code review and passing build gating on main repositories (which I completely agree with to be fair) but they don't fucking review pull requests at all? For fuck's sake, am I the only one that reviews them seriously and promptly in this shit ass fuck company? I follow all the recommended guidelines so don't bullshit me with "iT iS nOt FuN tO rEvIeW pUlL rEqUeStS", do your job or just remove yourself from the fucking gating process, you worthless admin ass crust.
And don't get me started on fucking builds that fail randomly because some worthless shit bucket added unstable networking tests as unittests somehow, making your pull request get auto-disapproved by peers upon failure.
I got so many pending pull requests and management won't do fuck all about it because they won't force people to do their job by fear of pushing them around and get HR complaints that I am tempted to simply give up and just start playing videogames.5 -
Context: large project moves to touch friendly UI, request and initial specs late last year, specs initial mockups early this year, designer promises final design before end of Q1.
Two sprints into development no fucking design, meeting today about it, designer has no fucking clue about what we actually agreed to last time. Promises again to have it for next time.
What the actual fuck? How difficult it is to least read up the fucking notes and do your fucking job that you are being paid for? Had a half fucking year!
After meeting...
Me: why do we even keep him around?
Pm: he is really overbooked...
Me: my balls are overbooked, don't promise if you can't deliver! (Leaves meeting room)
Fairly confident that this is the last project with this guy...
Am I the only one who just hates working with designers?2 -
4 really basic questions. Things you can't get through 1st year undergrad without knowing. One was testing you understand references, one testing understanding of inheritance, then exception handling... Then a bit of a tricky one: what happens when you query 2 tables in sql without a join. That took me a second because it's just not something I'm used to doing.
So yeah it's pretty basic stuff. At this point I was used to writing fairly long code snippets and quizzes with lots of gotchas that make the interviewers feel really smart. I think "ok they basically want to make sure I'm not totally useless and they're fine with training me". But noooooo. Being able to answer all that correctly is really impressive. That's never happened before. I'm a fucking prodigy.
So I got the job and I alternate between thinking I'm in Idiocracy and thinking the reception I get is some sort of elaborate joke -
Job hunting is so fucking stressful...
Everyone wants something different and the one company I actually might fit in does not have a position right now - great!
Oh and...why....the fuck... Does a company with a 10k downloads app need an aptitude test? :)3 -
From such a healthy environment this job turned into an extremely toxic one. Now i finally understand how a toxic environment looks like. It's extremely disgusting. Putting 5 tasks on my name to work in parallel and as i work they put 2 more. All High priority tasks. It is physically impossible. The scrum master whore told me to just check the code how to do something to users and understand this for monday so i can help QA guy to test it. I went over the code with a colleague and understood it. Today she screamed at me angry i didnt do the task. What the fuck are you talking about? I checked the code and im ready to do help the QA guy test it whenever necessary. Then she talked shit changing the task that i was supposed to not only understand the code but also do the task on Monday and now its the end of tuesday and its not done. Fuck you. That was not what she said initially. Its very Fucking confusing. Then she said to QA guy i give up i cant handle it with this guy sorry but ill have to report this to product owner. So be it. I dont give a fuck. I am ALONE working on a GIANT, unmaintainable, spaghetti, caveman technology codebase with broken outdated or nonexistent docs, nobody to help me, the colleague whos supposed to guide me is a good guy but overloaded with tasks himself so he doesnt have time, i him and many of us requested another person to join to work with me on same role but they dont have the budget which is a Fucking lie, a client worth trillions of dollars does not have a budget, yeah get fucked retards. This suffering and downfall of your project is mostly their fault. Theyre too arrogant and proud to understand or admit that it's not possible physically for 1 person to manage and keep knowledge and code on 7 tasks per day. All that for Fucking $8 an hour?????????? I hope cancer eats all of u. Every single one to the very fucking bones till ur bones break. This is fucking disgusting and sickening. Right when i was supposed to get paid $17 an hour (and thats gross income not even net.....) I am now fucking forced to quit this shithole toxic job. Because i realized no amount of fucking money, not even before-tax-$17-an-hour money is worth the weight of stress that i get punched with every fucking day. No fucking job is worth more than health. This is saddening and depressing extremely. All of my fucking plans are ruined. The car to buy on leasing--ruined by a whore. The 2 day vacation this week--ruined by a whore. Going out with my hot blonde gf during this miserable 2 day vacation--ruined by a whore. Meeting with 2 american clients I've been in touch with for several years to work on a side project--ruined by a whore, meeting canceled and delayed due to my overtime work. I am literally fucking treated like the Moscow Crocus Hall terrorist. They have no fucking sympathy or understanding for how fucking HARD this fucking DevOps job is where i work on a 30 year old legacy codebase with no fucking help. It is simply not possible. Now its a race between who's gonna fuck who: either i quit first or they fire me first. At this point its not a matter of if but when. Surely soon enough. Cant wait to get the FUCK away from these pieces of shitheads. I either have option to cry and go mentally insane by giving it my all until i fix the task on time but the stress i would get for that would need them to pay me at least 9 mill $ a year. Fuck with someone else you fucking retards. You're using slave labor to work for basically free just so u can profit a lot. Literally on the meeting one of their bosses said they get 50% of margin which is a lot in biz world for tech field. This is absolutely sickening and saddening that im treated like a fucking terrorist. Fucking Disgusting. Cant wait to not Ever fucking work in this toxic fucking place. Quitting by max 1st of april.3
-
Dev: [does some weird code to make test pass]
Me: this won't work. Literally the documentation says what you did won't work once we move towards our end goal architecture.
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
.... One Sprint later nothing works...
Dev: [does some weird code to make test pass]
Me: no. You need to solve underlying problem.
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
.... One Sprint later nothing works...
Me: please stahp
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
Me: WTF man do your fucking job
Scrum Master: stahp lowering our velocity
Me: wut? 😒2 -
"Tips" are fucking stupid. Any waiter or anyone who expects me to "tip" them is a fucking clown hobo. Full disrespect
You're telling me i should pay you extra money or else you're not gonna do YOUR job right? A job where you already receive stable monthly salary?
Whoever standardized "tipping" is a fucking CLOWN. Must have been a restaurant business paying billions for this marketing scam to normalize as if tipping 2$ is normal
Who the fuck are you? Are you my fucking friend? A relative? A family member? Why the fuck should i pay you extra money just because you want some extra money?
Guess what fucktard. I want some extra money too. Has anyone ever tipped me in my job? No. Has a client or will a client who paid for a software i develop ever tell me "hey youve done such a great job heres some extra $$$"? No. Will a client ever tell me "hey your software earned me 100k$ heres a $100 tip or a $1000 tip"? NO
If i dont get tips Fuck you. Rough world and live with it.
Anyone who wants or expects tips I immediately view him as:
- beggar
- gypsy
- homeless
What the fuck are you gonna do with 2$ 5$ 10$ tip bro? You're broke and your job sucks go and learn some skill and you might earn more if you're so stubborn about a tip
Today i paid for coffee $7 but the price was 6.25$. Expecting a change, the waiter just went off. I told him give me my fucking 0.75$ back you fuck. And so he did. But he gave me back 0.7$. Where the fuck is my 0.05$????? Fucking retard. You want to take extra money from me just for a COFFEE. YOURE HOMELESS BRO TF U GONNA DO WITH 5 CENTs???
Also the reason why i get so pissed off about this is
1) The other day i was at some other coffee shop also paying for coffee. Dont remember the price but i paid. However i miscalculated. I paid 0.10$ less than i was supposed to. She was standing there and telling me I'm missing 10 Fucking cents. Confused, i calculated again and realized i made a mistake. So i round it up to 1$ instead of 0.10$ and she kept everything instead of giving me the change of 0.90$. So its NOT ok that you're a gypsy for not accepting the payment because its missing 10 cents, but its TOTALLY fine that you take 0.90$ extra money just because you want to. GET FUCKED
2) The other day i was in a store buying food. At the cashier i paid $27. However i was missing 0.02$. The cashier told me do you have 0.05$ to coverup the missing funds. In disbelief, i was looking at her could not believe my fucking eyes what she asked. How fucking POOR can you get. I gave her more than 2 fucking cents and proceeded with my shit
Very valuable shit i learned from these stories: NO ONE will give a shit to accept a payment even if its missing 1 FUCKING CENT. But its totally fine that they dont return me however much they dont want to.
How about you sometimes fucking say "hey i know you you come to this store very often heres a discount"???
Or "its fine that you dont have 0.01 fucking dollars, you can take your food"???
Or "hey i seen you buy here often heres a fucking discount just for you today"????
Because of that i have decided to take ALL of my fucking hard earned money and ask for the exact change. I dont give a FUCK just as much as THEY dont give a FUCK.
For reference:
0.01$ = 1 in my currency
0.90$ = 90 in my currency
27$ = 2900 (4 figures) in my currency
My currency is shit. My country is shit. People in my city are shit. The whole vibe here is shit. And perhaps that is why i shit so much because i get stuffed with too much daily BULLSHIT12 -
I have one full stack dev, who claims to know Python and Webpack, but the funny thing is that he is complete shit in anything he does
As he is working in office and I work remotely, CEO and CTO give all his doings a priority
The most fucking part was when he left a project for 2 weeks and when came back he told that nothing had changed.
... he didn't even look to the code, or running website, he just told thst nothing was done
I was so insane, that I told him almost everything I think about him
Fortunately, I am still on this job and he in not working on this project =D -
Yes WP sites can be bad.
But as bad as it can be, just as easy it can serve as a good kickstarter for the next website.
If just the developer behind said website has some kind of dignity about the code they produce and respect for their fucking job!
1. Don't use bloated plugins.
2. Always vheck out alternatives.
3. Don't ever use paid plugins/themes... just don't.
I for one, whenever installing a plugin, if said plugin generates any kind of unexpected output such as a notice it's an immidiate uninstall, and then rolling my own.
I also use a bare minimum boilerplate theme which does not bundle any frameworks, additional libaries or other kinds of that bloatware for all my wp sites, this ensures that every site is somewhay unique.
I've seen so many "devs" being lazy as fuck, using the wrong themes/plugins to "code" the site.
No! using page builders such as visual composer or bloatware slideshows does not count as good tools.
If you buy a theme from themeforest thinking it will save you hours of custom development, then fuck you... go drown in acid.. because guess fucking what?
It will save you absolutely jack shit in the long run..
Anything stating otherwhise is marketing bullcrap4 -
Heard nothing back from an interview I attended 3 weeks ago. I'm sure this sort of thing is common, but it's never happened to me before.
It's so shitty and unprofessional.
The interview was a joke anyway, bouncing between business questions (strictly non-technical, as I learned that one of the interviewers thought Bootstrap and JS were the same), a written test for a Junior (testing to see if you knew arrays started at 0), then random technical questions which didn't allow me to prove what I could actually do.
So what the fuck are you recruiting for here, a business person, Junior, Mid or Senior developer?!
Total fucking bullshit.
Surely the best way to test a candidate is to let them try to fix a recent bug from your app?
Annoying because I know I can do the job.
Fuck you and your shitty fucking questions. -
So fucking stressed. I've been working on multiple projects at the same time, most of which have no clear goals because the one who assigned them to me doesn't know a shit. Everything is done superficially and without purpose but to make money. I need a break, a long one, and after that the only thing I will have to do is find a new job.2
-
Had to take all my annual leave this month because I didn’t take any during the year.
Im fucking bored. I wanna go to the office..
Don’t know what to do with my time. I stopped doing personal projects a while back because I never stick with one idea for long enough to finish it..
My job gives me a purpose..6 -
Working for friends that want to launch a start-up, providing them with what sounds like reasonable advices to me e.g 'maybe test your concept with some leads before asking me to develop the website', 'focus only on the main 2-3 features so we could launch quicker as I am solo dev on this' and 'once set, don't change everything every morning as I cannot make progress on the site if you keep asking me to code X versions of your fucking landing page (that they don't use)' and the only response I got goes like : "okay okay, BUT we've decided to do it this way, no need to test, customer will love it for sure' SURE ! But I am the only one to have a job and sleeping 3 hours to code your shit at night, while your lazy asses remain peacefully waiting for it to become 'the new Amazon' !3
-
!(pure)dev
This might sound like generalisation but the amount of paper people in France (atleast Paris) waste uneccesarily is shocking. It disturbs me to see some jackass printing pages after pages of garbage in the office each time they want to check if a printer is working as expected. Or the professors using huge white sheets to explain shit when the white board is right fucking behind them (to add to it, they use only one side of the sheet). Or literally every single store handing out paper receipts for a 1€ chocolate I buy. Why isn't their a digital alternative? Why are people so not bothered about how much they're fucking the planet just coz they have enough resources to live happily?
If machines ever overthrow humanity, I'm sure they'll do a better job in tidying up everything.4 -
So so so frustrated why is finding the right job such a fucking hassle! Landed my first junior dev job that was not what I was expecting mostly I work jira ticket written my middle aged morons to update PDF's servers that never had anything deleted from them 100k of files and about 10k folders shit you not. Don’t delete anything co worker deleted a file that took down a couple thousand person call center.
Looking at other junior positions with junior in the title and they want 4-7 years expierence at two different places. WTF if I have 7 years I would think I would a senior dev or close to one.
Just there is such a disconnect between the people who post the ads and vett the candiates to the hiring managers.
Does it get better? Started going to meet ups to meet more experienced devs in my area but still trying to find the right fit.2 -
(Spoilers about Ready Player one here)
FUCK YEAH!
I watched Ready Player One in 4DX AND IT COSTED AN UNHOLY FUCKING AMOUNT OF MONEY!
yet it was THE BEST MOVIE Ive ever watched, AND I MEAN IT! IT WAS SO FUCKING GREAT! THE CGI THE ACTORS!
STEVEN DID AN EXCELLENT JOB!
and as a Trekkie I LOVED the scene of Hallidays death I mean his coffin WAS A FUCKING PHOTON TORPEDO! and in the Last scene you could see a bat'leth HOW HOW COOL WAS THAT!
And dont get me started on all the other References like the Holy Handgranade, Rubiks Cube, FUCKING BATMAN HELPING SOMEONE CLIMBING, Minecraft OASIS edition, Halo... I CANT ITS TOO MUCH!1 -
(If anyone remember) A lot of mine two months old rants were related to one of my client who also happened to be my relative. Now this client's uncle (who is also a relative) sent a message to me and asked me if I can put one of his nephew in my company. He assured me he's a good programmer.
Are you fucking kidding me? Just like that? If he was any good, he would have got a job or at least would have done anything by himself.
P.S. When I looked at his CV, he knew almost all languages :-/3 -
First day of new job. No more rants about Blue Prism, that's in the past now. New year new me!
Time to go back to rant against backend developers and their fucking Laravel.
First lesson of the day: if I see another select2 I'm gonna commit war crimes. You see this nice plugin for jQuery, you use it everything's so cool and modern and you think you're the smart one of the team 'cause you don't know you've just polluted an otherwise perfectly fine web page with the dirtiest js shit you could possibly find, just because you didn't feel like searching one more minute for whatever replacement for a drop down you can easily find.
You're not the smart one. You're a criminal.4 -
Fucking windows updates...
Went to do a job on a tank in 18 deg F Weather with snow on the ground. One guy brought an ice fishing tent (very nice). This is next to petroleum tank. We got guys on top of tank waiting for me to get data using a Windows 10 lappy.
Lappy comes up and tries to get into bios to do a firmware update. WTF! I reboot and it does it again! Go to look for power adapter as it wont do update without power. Not in bag. It has to have power to do update.
So I drive back to shop (with guys waiting on top of tank) which is 5 miles away. I am pissed. Its snowing and I have to drive slow. I find that adapter. I get back to the tank and plug it in. The AC source (battery based) starts alarming as the lappy takes too much power. Fuck! But somehow it boots Windows without doing firmware update. Fuck you Windows!
I get my job done, but don't fucking trust windows at all. Had this been a field tech he would be pissing his pants. Useless shitty software you have zero control over. Now considering changing their OS to Linux for field work. I am rewriting their software anyway with something can run Windows or Linux.4 -
The needs of the many outweigh the need of the few, or one.
Yet they fucking stopped all the trains in Sydney because one idiot climbed the power lines.
How about those people who missed their job interviews? Business meetings? Doctor appointments? Scrum meetings? No they had to stop all the trains18 -
"Code"
And the website says "Lonely geeky people do need apply"
So I put my on my glasses and I went in to ask him why
He said you look like a fine outstanding young man, I think you'll do
So I shook his hand and, I said "I am glad I will be working for you."
Code, code, everywhere there's code
Neo vision, tweakin' my mind
Do code this, and API that, can't you read the fucking manual
And the sign says "If you want to use this site you must accept our cookies"
So I found the CEOs address and doxxed him all night!
To put up a dialog and block content from my sight.
If Todd was here, he'd tell it to your face, man, "it just works"
Code, code, everywhere there's code
Neo vision, tweakin' my mind
Do code this, and API that, can't you read the fucking manual
Oh, say now mister, can't you code
You got to have a laptop and a hoodie to get a job
You can't work, no you can't standup, you ain't supposed to be here
And the website says "You got to have an employee ID to get inside" - yo!
And the website says "Everybody welcome, come in, code and share"
But then they passed around a git pull at the end of it all
And I didn't have a character to code
So I got me laptop and I made up my own fuckin' code
I typed, "Thank you OSS for thinking 'bout me, I'm alive and doing fine", yeah
Code, code, everywhere there's code
Neo vision, tweakin' my mind
Do code this, and API that, can't you read the fucking manual
Code, code, everywhere there's code
Neo vision, tweakin' my mind
Do code this, and API that, can't you read the fucking manual
Yes! Some old song, called "Code code", I wish we did write that one, but
We didn't - git blame!
Hello World!6 -
Fucking hell. So, I had an interview with market research company and in said interview I got told to bring my passport to my first shift training and it was ok if it was 5 years out of date. Additional info, they were supposed to call us on Thursday to book said shift and send us an email with a information pack. They never did.
Ok, day of shift comes along. After I booked it because no one fucking bothered to call any of us. Email never arrived but whatever. I go to the place and bring my 3 years out of date polish passport... Big fucking mistake. They don't seem to like polish passport seeing as how it's only the British ones that get the out of date is okay thing. So I'm sitting there still calm because sure, company policy, they have to do it. The training guy was nice and all, offered to get me to their office to speak to them about it. I accept and off we go.
At the office, I basically get the information that it's only British passports that get it and I basically can't use anything else as proof of ID, which is funny seeing as I have a polish identity card that I can leave and enter the country on within the EU. I suppose I'm going to try looking for a job that doesn't require passports for now and if I find a good one then they can go get fucked by a bull for all I care.
In conclusion, I get to wait till I'm 18 (thankfully only a month) to apply for a new passport in the local polish consulate. Brilliant. All thanks to some cunt that decided they require fucking passports with such beautiful (note the sarcasm) rules. The fucktards.
Hoping the apocalypse comes early for these cocksuckers,
BadFox -
In a sprint planning meeting. Getting frustrated. I guess it's my fault. I guess I assumed that attending the same schedule meeting each week meant that we all knew when everything was due. My bad.
Seriously, I fucking hate systems people sometimes. We have 4 major tasks coming down the pipe, but they are scheduled in such a way in which they are staggered. But they want to punt the 1 of the 4 that is fucking done because it is going to cause a lot of testing, but the other three aren't coming til end of next month AT LEAST. So they want to stick their thumbs up their ass holes and wait to test the other three before testing the one that, again, IS FUCKING DONE!!! Are they worried that a super massive black hole will spontaneously form in earth's orbit and cause time to run backwards and somehow cause December to happen in October!?!?
No wonder systems is so fucking far behind. They can't see the forest for the trees. They're so big picture that months and years are at the same level of granularity. Fucking hell how is scrum better than our current agile process again? Besides the fact that it makes me attend more useless meetings and get more angry.
They are punishing the left hand for the actions of the right. Systems wasn't doing their job so now software has to slow down and miss schedule.2 -
(I am not a native english speaker so please excuse any mistakes I make while writing this)
I know, during an internship, its good to see all different sides of the job and of course QA is one of them. Its definately good to know as a dev later how QA works, I can see that. But why the F U C K do I have to test the same 3 pages (not websites, PAGES) since 5 days for 8 hours a day even though NOTHING CHANGES?! The page doesn't get updated, I am just sitting there clicking around and wasting my time I could use to learn more PHP or jQuery or WTFEver. But no! I have to sit there for hours and hours, doing nothing but staring at a page where I already tested literally anything that can be tested 4 days ago. If you don't have a good task for me over there in QA, then STOP WASTING MY FUCKING TIME instead of forcing me to continue testing this stupid website even though testing already completed a few days ago!!! I don't even have Test Cases to follow, its just “yea look at this page and click around is something is broken“ for 5 days. There is nothing broken, your fucking website works fine. And now STOP WASTING MY TIME!!!!6 -
Today marks the end of my first week as a full-time employee in this company (been here a month as a part-time before being hired).
I joined as a QA agent, but they put me in localization duty (in addition to QA) about two weeks in. This week, they told me I'd be responsible for the whole translation process, from choosing the tools to implementing them.
On one side, I'm excited as hell to have some responsibility. On the other, afraid I'll fuck it up and wreck my shiny new position.
Any tips on not fucking up you new job? 😅3 -
uPlay is ramming me down the throat harder than what should be legal, I can barely breathe.
I'm trying to install Far Cry 5, I preordered it. But.. download is stuck on fucking 0B. That being 0 bytes.
I tried disabling all firewall/antivirus, clean Windows boot, restart, reinstall launcher, slam the table, like everything.
Why isn't the shit fucking doing its job? Anyone who got ideas for what I could try next?
I'm not gonna send a message to their support, I'd rather have sex with a hedgehog, where I'm the one being penetrated. Fuck me.6 -
Why is it necessary that software be in a schedule meeting when software has 2 items on the schedule? This meeting is effectively useless for software. It is an unnecessary expenditure of money on a contract that is overrunning. It is right before we go on holiday break and they are training a new planner. And the lead is leaving in January so why is he still asking me questions about what I'm doing. Especially when I have told him what I am doing 4 times already. Fucking hell. Why is it that no one seems to trust me to do my job and be on top of things? And why is it that the people with shit memories are the ones that want to be involved in everything? And most importantly, why does everyone pretty universally hate meetings and regard them as useless yet insist we hold them?2
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My most disliked part about my job is one recurring event that happens way too often: waiting for other teams to do their fucking jobs so that I can do mine.1
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There is no fucking holy grail of programming. It's better to use the right tools for each task instead of wasting hours to make the wrong tool do a horrible job. But noooooo. Even since this co-worker got here, he bragged how good Drupal 7 is for everything, and he never even ised it once before! Now we have 2 fucking projects beyond schedule and a new one coming ing, each of which tries to use a fucking CMS as if it was a fucking framework. Fucking idiots who believe setting a couple of options via gui to generate random code means programming. Fucking bosses who believe using 3rd party community modules and hacking around them to have them do different stuff is better than coding what we need. I fucking gave up and started using raw php to be able to finish this fucking project, but my damn co-worker refuses to. He keeps swearing and punching the desk, saying it's our clients' fault for asking stupid features, and if you dare to mention how it may because we're using a cms like it was a framework, he just goes full bigot about Drupal. Bloody Hell, it would have taken lass than 3 weeks in Rails. I could just headbutt a kitten right now.1
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archaic jsp (java servlet pages) making life hard to do some fucking widget you gotta populate with some dynamic data
upgrading to a modern front end framework is not something the company is interested in doing (react, angular, whatever the hell's popular these days)
we can hack around it on the backend but we'd have to shuffle a boolean down to get used in one place at the bottom only (straightforward but ugly solution)
i hate my job and i don't know what im doing, fuck front end2 -
Quick and dirty job to get some data into a DB wasted my entire evening.
Created table with few columns, tried writing to it from NodeJS app and it kept complaining I wasn't providing values for columns that didn't even exist. After ages pissing about decided that the DB gods had cursed this particular table so created a second one with same DDL. Now it worked first fucking time. Then it finally dawned on me, I'd managed to pick a reserved table name and the RDBMS didn't think to give me a warning when I created it. Not only did it not warn me but it kept going as it nothing was the matter and didn't report the extra columns on a SELECT *. -
Im fucking fed up with overbloated "all in one" ORMs.
For shit I cant find simple ORM that would literally just do fucking CRUD for me.
Thats all I require for some small project, yet still for few tables I have 2 choices:
a) do it without ORM and write models with raw SQL (which I usually end up doing, as its just more fault tolerant and works better)
b) install overloaded ORM that I wont use even 1% of features
Guys, why the fuck nobody created anything small, tiny and yet usefull? I know my SQL sucks and that is reason I want to use ORM in the first place. But when Im just forced?
Best what I found in terms of ease of use, and beeing not too heavy was RedBeanPHP.
A freaking ORM that will create database on the fly. It's awesome, sure. It's usefull, sure.
BUT STILL ALL I NEED IN SMALL PROJECT IS 1% OF THAT FUNCTIONALITY.
Does literally every single ORM dev want to feel their dick when they list out features list?
There should be allways proper tool for proper job. Its like using symfony for creating onepage website with contact form. WTF.13 -
Great fucking job github and git-lfs
Github,
First don't tell no one about your fucking limits and then when one goes to delete those files that clogged up the storage, fucking don't let them
Also, even for the unsuccessfull commit, let's charge their fucking bandwidth
And for git-lfs
You can't even fucking use the goddamn help command on git-lfs which they suggest you to use. (I installed git-lfs just as they said)2 -
Ok being a developer and a technical assistant at the same time
Yesterday was out in the field we where fixing network at one insurance company and extending telephone line to of the offices....man what a labor intense job....
we had to drill a whole on one of those metal trunking.... man those fuckers are hard as fuck
having had spent the whole fucking day out the office i get a call saying 1 of the laptops at the office didnt have OS installed and one had a defected screen and they where in stock
and Im supposed to be checking these laptops when they come before going into stock
and Im like WTF!!??? confused and shit + being tired
got back to the office and fuck it was a shit show
the whole technical department got fucked over this and Up to now I have no fucking idea how those laptops got into stock and we missed it
My only answer is they never came for checking and if you try to air that out they will say you are try to blame some1 else for the fuck up and FUCK it
We had to write reports this morning me had 2 from the tender issue
fuck this
fuck this
fuck this fucking shity place -
To ship a package of two USB cables from one US city to another. What could be easier for a large company? Well, hold on a little.
I ordered two fucking cables from fucking Nomad at 15TH OF FUCKING JULY, and they are still not shipped. Here's how their customer support works: you send them an email, they reply in like a day or two, and that's it, that email thread is abandoned. They won't visit it again. You should write a whole new message where you say "hey, the previous time you said me X, so I want you to do Y then", and the message title should be different, otherwise they'll ignore it.
My roof is under construction now. When it was raining and there was a rain both inside and outside my apartment, I filmed it and an article about the situation was in my local newspaper in like 20 minutes. Russian government organizations are notorious for ignoring people's requests, shutting down their telephones and doing other shit like that, but in one day I managed to collect the foundation of overhaul, my utilities provider, the foreman of the organization responsible for roof repair, his supervisor and the actual guy that did that job. That same day, they all was at my doorstep, collecting the evidence, signing papers, apologizing, threatening to sue each other and collectively signing a document that states that they owe me either a full financial compensation or an overhaul. I managed to do it in the country where you throw an empty plastic cup at a cop and go to jail for it for five years.
Nomad, tell me, what exactly is stopping me from going full Jackson Pollock with a .45 on your company all over the social media (props to @SortOfTested)? You think I can't handle a mediocre iPhone case manufacturer?
Think again.2 -
I've went away but now I'm back. My last job was a fucking nightmare, they were well into my rants! New job now. I'll be tearing into my old one in due course. Watch this space.3
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When the website does auto-copy to clipboard and adds spaces to the copied text. >:(
Let me copy it if you can't do your one fucking job arghhh -
I fucking hate my current job. I switched to this one a few months ago, since my last one was getting stale after being there for nearly a decade.
I'm currently considering to return to my last position. Did somebody face a similar situation? Got a new position, only to realize that it sucks?2 -
> Colleagues complain all the time about dumb shit which have no relevance whatsoever to the job (see my "cat in voice call" post): I get scolded, I need to change
> I complain for the first time in 2 years about relevant stuff which actually matters to the job (some guy collecting bad decisions one after the other): I get scolded, I shouldn't trash talk colleagues
The key lesson I'm learning here is how everyone is allowed to do everything towards everyone, everytime, but by God don't you dare doing it about what should be relevant about your fucking job. We don't do that here.1 -
what is the point of me being here i do nothing but sit in my room and do absolutely nothing. i have no car. i have no job. i have no money. i cant do shit i cant go out with my friends bc it’s always i need money to anything. i’m not good at school i’m so fucking far behind i’m practically a freshman i have no point in even doing anything i’m so useless. so easy to replace i just want a life. i want to live in the city so i can get a better job or even a job at all i wanna go places do things get a car and a job see the boy i’m so in love with. but i cant i’m so trapped in this house it’s not even funny. i have no phone as soon as i leave the house. i cant call or text anyone important. i wanna graduate. move out. go to cosmetology school. live with the love of my life. start a life. move on with this shitty one i’m living now and pay for my own things. but until then i’ll just dream and dream about everything i could have and do. i wish i was that kid who had money who got handed a car from there parents and got to leave the house with no troubles like how am i gonna pay for this or who’s gonna get me how am i gonna get there and back. i want nothing more then to just be happy and be accomplishing things but i can’t. i am the worst daughter ever.3
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Update:
I've been trying to leave DoD for a couple of months now. Translating my 10 year's experience with complex Intelligence enterprise level systems to something relatable to the civilian IT world. Grabbed a few certs to help out A+, network+ and security+ with Linux+ as my next target. Photos of me working on unclassified systems, radios, cell towers and servers. I'm a teacher for military UAS so this shouldn't be to hard to get even a basic job in IT right.
No one will hire...
Linux admin: Nope
Network admin: Nope
Assistant Network admin: Nope
IT call service: Nope
Pool cleaner fucking nope
Many interviews and nothing
I'm broke and sold all of my personal valuables. I can't hold out much longer and really looking at becoming homeless. But I'm kinda ok with it, one last payment on my apartment and car is all I can do now. My parents think I'm in Afghanistan working a six figure job lol
DoD: we see you're trying to leave we'll pay you alot to teach A+, Network+ and Security+ traveling all across the country and staying at hotels with all expenses paid.
FU FU FU I want out please tell me someone has a job, I'll be a janitor of a server room Idc I just want out. Fuck the pay
I start Tuesday...4 -
Dear colleagues,
YOU HAVE RUINED JAVASCRIPT!!@##@
Yes, you are one of those that are responsible for giving JavaScript a bad name and using jQuery for FUCKING EVERYTHING!@#$
Start thinking for yourselves, ditch this shit before it's too late and learn how to write some actual fucking code. The information is out there, you can do it. If you need handholding with $.each, creating concatenated strings with error prone code to send them in one field to the server, just to explode it back there, then consider that the world doesn't need your BULLSHIT code and go and get a job you're actually good at. Stop ruining it for the rest of us.
THANK YOU8